Everything's Not Lost (UC, Z/L, MATURE) [WIP]

[Applebylicious]

11/05/05 -

Hey guys.

This is an extremely difficult note to post, because it sort of signifies the end of an era for me. I hope all of you will understand and support my decision, and not hold it against me for any reason.

As of now, I am officially resigning from writing fanfic for Roswell. This is something that has been on its way for a while now, and the only reason I've been putting it off is because of the wonderful support you all have given me. But I'm afraid my time has come to an end. I've hit my stride, and there's no point in trying to deny it to myself any longer.

I'll always treasure the time I've spent getting to know all of you, and hopefully I've succeeded in entertaining you all as well. That's all I've ever wanted to achieve.

I won't lie and say that this moment doesn't bring me a sense of great relief - as much as I love this fandom, there are things that I hate about it, as well. Those are the things I won't miss. However, the negative pales in comparison to the positive and that's what I plan on taking with me.

I've been writing for Roswell since the first season, and never in my wildest imagination did I dream that it would turn out this way. The way you all have taken to my stories means more to me than you'll ever know. I'd like to thank everyone who ever took the time to give me a chance, who left me feedback, who nominated me for an award, who recommended me to a friend. It's because of you that I am where I am today. And you are what has made this journey so incredible for me.

I'd like to take this time to report that just because I won't be WRITING anymore stories for Roswell, doesn't mean I won't be around. I will be - chatting, reading, keeping the Roslove alive.

I will also still be writing, for those of you interested. From now on, I'm actively writing in the Veronica Mars fandom, and you can read any further works by me at The Pink Spy Pen or at My Journal. So if you're a fan of VM, I'd love to hear from you!

And please don't be afraid to drop me a line, anyway - either via PM here, or via my email at f0llow_the_butterflies@yahoo.com.

Last but not least, I will finish posting 4th and Inches and probably The Jade Tower, but other than that, I'm afraid I will be leaving some fics unfinished. I'm sorry for that, but I hope you can all understand my circumstances and the fact that Roswell no longer inspires me in that way. Once again, if you have any questions, feel free to contact me and I'll try to answer the best I know how.

It's truly been a pleasure, everyone.

Much love,

Lindsay (Applebylicious)

[Applebylicious]

For those of you who missed the chat - shame on you, hee hee! - I'm posting the outline here. I'll leave it up for a few days, then this thread will be moved to Dead and Buried. Thanks once again for all of the support, everyone! I'm glad to at least be able to share my plans for the fic with you, if not finish it.

PLEASE NOTE THAT THESE ARE SIMPLY NOTES THAT HAVE BEEN BEEFED UP IN ORDER TO EXPLAIN THE DIRECTION THE FIC WOULD HAVE GONE. GRAMMAR/SPELLING ERRORS MIGHT BE PRESENT.


Everything’s Not Lost by Lindsay
– A Comprehensive Outline.

<center>Chapters 11-Conclusion</center>




Chapter Eleven

• • Ava is reliving Zan’s “death”. She’s now living in a small-California town with human boyfriend, Cameron “Tater” Wallace. Tater knows about her alien status because she saved him from being robbed during a drug deal gone bad. He’s a rich boy-turned-punk who is extremely protective of Ava, but knows that she’s harboring feelings of a past she refuses to share with him. After a particularly vivid dream, Ava is shaken enough to reveal the events from years ago, and Tater is disturbed to discover that Rath and Lonnie still pull Ava’s strings. Ava admits that she’s begun to feel that perhaps Zan has survived, and knows she has an obligation to him if it’s true. Tater is stunned.
  
  • In bed. Liz is attempting to convince Zan to stay, but he is still plagued by reservations over Isabel. He finally agrees, but Liz feels that he’s hiding something from her. :::Play up Ava connection here:::
  
  • Isabel is dressing to visit Alex’s grave. She’s not ready to visit Jesse’s, and has a flashback to the car accident. Kyle walks in on her, immediately sensing something is wrong when she tries to hide her tears from him. They argue about whether she’s ready to leave the house so soon after the healing, but Isabel stands firm that she “needs to talk to Alex about something”. Kyle relents, but insists upon coming with her. It is revealed during this conversation that both Evans’ adults are deceased, which is why neither have been to visit their daughter. Diane committed suicide after Max’s death, and Phillip of more natural causes. Isabel is the only Evans left, and this explains more the reason why she’s so determined to force a bond between herself and Zan - who stumbles upon them as they’re leaving the house. Awkward moment during which Isabel tricks him into joining their outing. Liz watches nearby, unseen.
  
  • Valenti household. Michael comes home from work to find Liz speaking with someone back in New York about when she’ll be returning. In typical Michael fashion, he confronts her about deserting them all now that Isabel has been healed. Liz tries to calmly explain that she was merely reassuring her roommate that things were going well, but Michael retaliates with a few choice barbs about Max. Things dissolve from there, with an outpouring of grief and frustration from both sides. During a particularly tense moment, Liz passes out. Michael is shocked and frightened as the symbol of the V constellation appears on her left hand. Something inside of him recognizes the meaning: A King has chosen his mate.

Chapter Twelve

• • Graveyard. Kyle and Zan have a silent standoff while Isabel hovers over Alex’s grave. Alex appears, greeting Isabel with quiet acceptance as he notes Kyle watching over her protectively. Alex warns her that something bad is about to happen, and that Isabel needs to figure out a way to “keep him with her”. Isabel wonders if he means Zan, but Alex doesn’t confirm or deny the statement before disappearing as Zan and Kyle approach. Zan is silent, but Kyle is obviously concerned as he suggests that it’s time to leave. She agrees, but not before taking one last look over her shoulder to see Alex in the distance, watching with worried eyes. She turns just as Zan collapses, chanting in a language that strikes a chord somewhere inside of her. At the same time, Kyle’s cell phone rings. It’s Michael, telling them that Liz is having a seizure. Both look down to find Zan clawing at his shirt, tearing the material away to reveal the sign of the King.
  
  • Ava is walking home from work and is pulled into an alley by an unseen force. She fights, prepared to use her powers against her attacker when she comes face to face with Rath and Lonnie. Both are the worse for the wear since attempting to murder Zan and losing their chance to leave the planet after Max discovered their duplicity. They demand that she tell them where Zan is hiding. Ava is unnerved by their presence and by the fact that they know Zan is alive. She denies knowing anything about it, and Rath angers and blasts her into the wall. Lonnie stops him from doing further damage, calmly explaining that they know Zan is alive because the Four Square symbol has reappeared, marking their flesh. Lonnie then demands to know whether Ava knows that it only happens when the King finds his mate. Ava is taken aback by this, and Rath snidely baits her that Zan has moved on without any of them. Ava is hurt, but replies that she knew she was never the one for Zan. Lonnie, tiring of the game, tells Ava that she still has the strongest connection to Zan because of their genetic coding, and she’ll help them track him down. Ava bravely demands to know why she should help them, only to be horrified when Rath reappears with Tater in tow – who is unconscious and heavily drugged.

Chapter Thirteen

• • Back at the Valenti household. Isabel and Kyle arrive, a sedated Zan in tow, to find Michael and Maria attempting to hold Liz down in Kyle’s room. Liz is wild-eyed and soaked with sweat, shrieking in the same unknown language Zan had used, and Isabel begins translating without thought. “The Power of Four. The battle for Salvation has begun and shall end with him.” Michael finishes the chant with “A King has chosen.” Kyle and Maria are stunned, and not a little worried as Liz quiets, dropping into a coma-like sleep along with Zan, the alien symbol glowing on their skin.
  
  • The sewers of California. Ava is watching over Tater, who has awakened to discover the part he’s played in gaining Ava’s cooperation with Rath and Lonnie. He doesn’t remember anything but that he was on his way to grab a pack of cigs and was knocked cold by a blast of power. Ava is distressed, but thankful he’s all right. Tater rages that everything’s his fault, and begs Ava not to do whatever the others have planned. Ava hesitates, and then tells him that if she doesn’t, Rath and Lonnie have sworn to kill him. She’s not willing to put his life at risk in order to defy her family, and Tater retorts angrily that “this isn’t the girl I fell in love with.” Ava is hurt, but the conversation is cut short when Lonnie appears. She informs them that the four of them will be leaving that night for New Mexico, since that’s where Ava’s connection to Zan is the strongest. Ava pleads with her to leave Tater in California, but Lonnie refuses, saying that he’s their only insurance that Ava won’t betray them. Tater stands by silently, but his mind is racing with plans…

Chapter Fourteen

• • Isabel and Michael are talking about what’s happened. Michael doesn’t want to accept that Zan could possibly have taken Max’s place as King, but is unable to deny the evidence that this is true. They share a moment of shared pain, brought on by memories of Max, when Maria and Kyle interrupt to say that Zan and Liz are awake. The group gathers in the bedroom and Liz wearily explains her theory of the passing of power from Max to Zan. Zan is unhappy and clearly uncomfortable by the situation, but doesn’t speak out against his mate as he excuses himself to use the bathroom. He leaves the room, only to be followed by Isabel who asks him if he still believes that his finding Liz and coming to Roswell is a coincidence. Zan doesn’t answer, but concedes the point. Isabel is quiet for a moment, and then tells him she has something to show him. Zan is hesitant, and then follows her outside. Isabel drives them to the Pod Chamber, which has been sealed off since Tess’s departure years ago. Zan feels an immediate draw to the chamber, and allows Isabel to lead him inside where he glimpses the discarded pods and the Granolith. Isabel tells him about how she discovered the chamber, and Zan studies the Granolith in amazement, realizing that he’s found what his family had been searching for their entire lives. Isabel tells him that he has to learn to trust her and Michael, and is offering their most important secret to him in exchange. Zan wavers, torn between hatred for his sister and his growing affection for her Dupe.
  
  • On the road to Roswell. Tater is awakened by Rath in the middle of the night as Ava and Lonnie sleep. He attempts to fight the alien as Rath drags him out of the car and into an alley behind an abandoned factory building. Rath tells him that he’ll destroy Ava if Tater doesn’t cooperate and follow orders without fucking anything up for them. Tater calls his bluff boldly, claiming that they’d never hurt Ava. They need her help to find Zan. Rath admits this is true, and then follows the statement up with “but there’s more than one way to hurt Ava.” Grinning maliciously, Rath proceeds to beat Tater up until the human is unable to fight back. Lonnie yells for Rath, and he leaves only to come back and find Tater missing.

Chapter Fifteen

• • Inside of the Pod Chamber. Isabel is telling Zan everything they know about the Granolith. Zan takes it all in, still slightly bewildered by the fact that the object of his long search is staring him in his face. He says as much to Isabel, who then tells him that Rath and Lonnie came to Roswell to seduce Max into giving up the location. Zan bitterly reminisces that he’d refused to believe that the Roswell Four was the true Four Square and had scoffed at the idea that they’d know the location of the Granolith. This was one of the reasons Rath, Lonnie and Ava tried to murder him. Isabel recalls Ava’s help saving Max, and wonders if Ava really meant to hurt Zan. Zan isn’t reassured.
  
  • Valenti household. Liz wonders what’s taking Zan so long, and Michael suggests that perhaps he’s left them all high and dry. Maria is irritated by Michael’s continued resistance to accept Zan into the fold and says she saw Zan leave with Isabel. Kyle perks up at this, wondering why they wouldn’t have told anyone. Liz says she knows: Isabel took Zan to the Pod Chamber. Michael demands to know how she knows this, and Liz hesitates before admitting that she can now track Zan through the V symbol. The others are astonished, and Michael asks if she had the same reaction to Max. Liz says no, but then backtracks to say that Max is the one who changed her, therefore she’s always been connected to him. Kyle worries over Isabel and Zan being alone, knowing Zan’s feelings regarding Vilondra. Liz assures him that Zan would never hurt Izzy. Kyle flares up and demands to know how she can be so sure, and if it has something to do with her suddenly being Queen. The others are surprised by his vehemence, and Michael admits he has a point. Liz is frustrated and upset, and Maria moves away from the window, interrupting to say that Isabel and Zan have returned.

Chapter Sixteen

• • On the road to Roswell. Ava goes wild when Rath returns, covered in blood without Tater. She attacks Rath, her grief and rage strengthening her assault so that she easily overpowers him. Lonnie lets it go for several moments, and then steps in to say that Tater has abandoned Ava just as Zan did, so now she owes her allegiance to no one but them. Ava turns on her, but Lonnie is able to control Ava’s powers as she forces the smaller female to the ground. She warns that another outburst from Ava and she’ll kill Zan for real this time. Ava claims that that was their plan all along. Lonnie doesn’t deny this, but releases Ava from her hold as the other female alien weeps for her loss. Rath smirks that she truly has no one but them now. Ava doesn’t argue as they get back into the car and continue the trip to Roswell.
  
  • Upon arriving back at the Valenti home, Zan demands to speak to Liz. Ignoring the weak protests from the others, Liz asks them to leave so that she and Zan are alone. She asks him what he found at the Chamber, and he asks her if she realizes what the symbol means. Studying it on her palm, Liz softly responds that she’s aware that she’s his chosen mate. Zan defensively asks her how she feels about it. She wonders at his reaction, and then he reaches out and connects with her. The two slide into a flashback of happier times between Max and Liz. Liz is moved to tears as she watches herself interacting with Max during the night in Michael’s apartment when they discovered the orb. The flash abruptly changes to the night Max slept with Tess, and she jerks back in pain as Zan stares at her. He demands to know whether it’s true that Max betrayed her in that way. Liz hedges, explaining that she’d pushed Max to Tess by sleeping with Kyle. Zan is furious when she adds that it had all been a setup. He insists on knowing why she manipulated Max, and wonders if she’s merely manipulating HIM now. Liz is taken aback, but doesn’t allow his fury to hurt her. She ignores his anger and continues the story, explaining the events that led up to Max’s death. When she speaks of the Dupe’s visit to Roswell, Zan grows tenser. He’s shocked to hear of Ava’s role in saving Max’s life. Liz tells him that she thought Ava was truly good, and Zan is vulnerable at the idea that one of his family didn’t betray him. Emotion gets the better of them both and they make love. After, Liz falls asleep, hand over the mark on his chest as Zan lies awake, pondering the new events. Something flashes through his eyes, and he suddenly realizes they’re coming for him.

Chapter Seventeen

• • Tater is hitchhiking to Roswell. He knows he has to get there first and warn Zan, but the only thing he has to go on is a random flash he received from Ava during a particularly heavy bout of lovemaking. Battered and nearly broken, he finally is met with success as a truck stops to offer him assistance. Ignoring the offer to be taken to a hospital, he asks where the driver is headed. The driver answers that he’s on his way to Santa Fe. Tater asks if he can drop him off in Roswell, and the driver reluctantly agrees.
  
  • Kyle goes to see Isabel before bed. She’s looking through old photo albums of Max with a strange sort of smile on her face. Kyle decides to leave, but she catches sight of him and asks him to come and look with her. He hesitates, then joins her on the floor as they peruse the photos. They come across the prom picture from season 2 and the mood plummets as awkwardness sets in. Kyle blurts out that he should have known then about Tess, and Isabel comforts him by saying that there was no way he could have known. Tess had fooled her first, after all. Somber, Kyle declares that at one time he’d thought himself in love with Tess. Isabel listens silently, wondering why the revelation stings. She traces the image of Alex on the photo, and suddenly his words from the graveyard come back to her. She begins to wonder if it really was Zan Alex was referring to. Kyle catches her staring at him consideringly and makes a joke about something being in his teeth, when Isabel suddenly drags him forward by the collar and kisses him. Kyle is stunned, but recovers quickly enough to kiss her back. The moment heats up as the two succumb to the feelings that have been growing for longer than they care to remember.
  
  • Zan is dreaming of the New York Four coming to find him. The dream takes a nightmarish turn as he watches Lonnie murder Liz before his eyes. He awakens with a scream on his lips to find Liz comforting him. Ragged with emotion, he pushes away from her and stalks out of the house, running through the streets of Roswell and collapsing on the side of the highway, breaking down as the enormity of the situation weighs down on him. Headlights signal the approach of someone, and he half-expects to find Liz there. Instead, it’s Michael. They don’t speak as Michael joins him on the ground, both staring up at the prominent V constellation in the otherwise starless sky. Zan finally admits that he doesn’t have things under control, and he doesn’t know how to protect Liz should anyone come after him. Michael asks him if he has reason to believe anyone would know he was still alive. Zan tells him that so long as he was alone, he’d been able to conceal his whereabouts and the fact that he was alive from his family. But now that he’d found a mate – Liz – he couldn’t control his powers on his own. They’d easily be able to track him. And her. Michael is disturbed by this revelation, and wonders if they might already be on their way. Zan assures him that they are. Before Michael can reply, a strange figure comes running up to them in the darkness. Zan and Michael prepare to defend themselves, but the lights from a passing car illuminate the figure’s face. It’s Tater, who takes one look at Zan and tells him they’re coming. While Michael is demanding to know who the young man is, Zan feels something probing his mind. Recognizing Lonnie, he attempts to break the connection, but is too late. He brusquely informs the others that it’s too late. They’re in Roswell, and they want him dead. Michael tells him that they’ll be in for a fight, and Zan corrects him to say that no one will be fighting for him. He’ll simply leave Roswell and draw Rath and Lonnie away from the others. Michael isn’t happy with this decision, but it’s Tater who interrupts to say “It isn’t you they want. It’s your girl.”

Chapter Eighteen

• • Kyle and Isabel in bed. Neither knows what to say after what’s just happened between them, but Kyle breaks first and nervously cracks a joke. Isabel turns to him and tells him that she’s not in any sort of place to be in a relationship. Kyle is devastated, but understands. Isabel then repeats that she isn’t ready, but it doesn’t matter, because she wants to be with Kyle more than she wants to feel safe or secure. They kiss; things heat up again, until Liz’s screams break them apart. They quickly make their way downstairs, and discover she isn’t alone. Rath leers at their state of undress as Maria stares at them wildly and thrashes against invisible bonds. Liz is in the air, hands spread apart like a modern-day Sacrifice, and shrieking as if experiencing horrific pain. Without thinking, Kyle throws himself at Rath, who easily blasts him into the wall. Maria screams, and Isabel demands to know what they want. Ava seems strangely detached as Lonnie answers her Dupe, saying they’ve come for the Royal Pair. Isabel plays dumb, saying that Max is dead, but Lonnie doesn’t buy it. She grabs Liz and points out the royal symbol on her palm. Isabel bluffs that they’ve never seen it before, while gathering her power. The door crashes in and Zan and Michael appear, and Isabel uses the distraction to disarm Rath, who is holding Maria captive. The ensuing chaos is magnificent as the Roswellians and New York Four battle it out against each other. Zan catches sight of Liz and falters, which is enough for Lonnie to use to her advantage. She grabs Liz and blasts her with all of the power inside of herself. Zan screams in horror as Liz goes pale and dies before his eyes, just as his dream predicted. Michael steps in as Zan is rendered useless, coming face to face with his own self as Rath taunts him. The two soldiers battle mercilessly, with the end result being Rath thrown through a window and impaled on a ragged shard of glass. Meanwhile, Isabel finds herself at Ava’s mercy, who is still showing the same unemotional presence as when she’d first appeared. Isabel pleads to Ava to help her, to help save her family. Ava wavers, but her expression hardens again as she explains to Isabel that so long as she lives, Ava can never escape Rath and Lonnie. They’ll continue taking everything from her. Isabel continues to try and appeal to Ava, but to no avail as the smaller alien mind warps her so that her sense of judgment is precarious at best. Tater appears just as Ava is preparing to kill Isabel, and throws himself in front of the blast. Ava screams at him, but it’s too late. Tater dies saving Isabel, by Ava’s own hand. Ava is grief-stricken and wild as she tries to heal her fallen boyfriend. Isabel tells her that the only person who can save Tater is Zan, who is slowly losing the battle to Lonnie. Ava turns to find Liz staring straight through her, and jolts as Liz’s voice sounds in her head, telling her what to do and offering her own power. The two combined help to destroy Lonnie. Before she dies, Zan demands to know why she betrayed him, angry and deeply hurt as his and Max’s feelings merge together. He tells Lonnie that he tried to love her, but Lonnie simply tells him that love means nothing compared to power and glory. Zan finishes her off himself, and she dies cursing her lover Khivar’s name. Liz falls to the floor, unconscious and not breathing as Zan makes his way to her and begs for him not to leave him. He places his hand on her stomach, in the same place where Max healed her all those years ago, and is taken inside Liz’s mind.

Chapter Nineteen

• •Liz is with Max. He’s holding her, staring into her eyes with a smile in his own gaze. She’s so moved by the sight of him that she can’t choke out any words other than his name, over and over. He looks over her shoulder and tells her that she’ll always have a part of him with her. She asks if he means Zan, and he shakes his head and cryptically touches her abdomen. As his meaning sinks in, he disappears and Zan appears. She cries out in relief, and the two reunite as Zan tells her he has to bring her back. Liz tells him she’s pregnant and Zan is stupefied, but accepts it readily as he finally allows Liz all the way past every barrier he has. Zan asks how she knows and she tells him about Max. He’s not sure what to make of this – or the fact that Max will live on forever inside him and her - but Liz reassures him. ::Possibly use this line? “He’s my past and you…you’re my future, Zan.”
  
  • Back in the Valenti house, Ava is crying over Tater’s body as Liz and Zan come to. Ava throws herself on Zan’s mercy, begging him to help save the man she loves. Zan is at first unmoved by her display, and fumes that she tried to kill him and the ones HE loved. Ava breaks down, unable to explain herself. Isabel tells Zan that Ava was acting out of her own pain and suffering, not unlike his own when he first came to Roswell. Zan wants to argue the point, but Michael of all people says something to make him realize how wrong he is. The two males finally come to an understanding, and Zan relents as Ava weeps softly. He moves to Tater’s fallen form and quickly and methodically heals him. Maria asks how it’s possible since Max hadn’t been able to heal Alex’s body, but Kyle’s the one who figures it out first. And it all has to do with Liz and Zan accepting one another as truly chosen mates. ::play up the Max/Liz insecurity after EOTW:: Tater is healed, and the others rejoice as Isabel looks out to find Jesse and Alex watching her with a smile on their faces as Kyle comes to her side. Liz has a similar moment with Max, that fades all too quickly. Both women realize that no matter what they’ve lost, they’ve gained much more.

Conclusion

• • Back in New York, months later. Liz is selling her apartment to Candice, who is equally parts horrified and intrigued by her continued association with Zan. Her pregnancy comes as a monumental shock, but Candice is happy for them both in the long-run and offers to throw Liz a shower. Liz relents only when Zan cracks a joke about how turning down free stuff would be a crime against his nature.
  
  • Isabel and Kyle get married, with Michael standing in as Best Man and Zan giving her away in lieu of Mr. Evans. Very emotional scene as they all reminisce about her wedding to Jesse. Wedding song for Isabel and Kyle: Everything’s Not Lost by Coldplay, and it holds a double meaning for Liz and Zan.
  
  When I counted up my demons
  Saw there was one for every day
  With the good ones on my shoulders
  I drove the other ones away
  
  So if you ever feel neglected
  And if you think that all is lost
  I'll be counting up my demons, yeah
  Hoping everything's not lost
  
  When you thought that it was over
  You could feel it all around
  And everybody's out to get you
  Don't you let it drag you down
  
  'Cos if you ever feel neglected
  And if you think that all is lost
  I'll be counting up my demons, yeah
  Hoping everything's not lost
  
  If you ever feel neglected
  If you think that all is lost
  I'll be counting up my demons, yeah
  Hoping everything's not lost
  
  Singing out
  Oh, oh, oh, yeah
  Oh, oh, yeah
  Oh, oh, yeah
  Everything's not lost
  
  So come on, yeah
  Oh, oh, yeah
  Come on, yeah
  And everything's not lost
  
  Oh, oh, yeah
  Oh, oh, yeah
  Oh, oh, yeah
  And everything's not lost
  
  Come on, yeah
  Oh, oh, yeah
  Come on, yeah
  
  Come on, yeah
  Oh, oh, yeah
  Come on, yeah
  And everything's not lost
  
  Sing out, yeah
  Oh, oh, yeah
  Come on, yeah
  And everything's not lost
  
  Come on, yeah
  Oh, oh yeah
  Sing out, yeah
  And everything's not lost...
  
  THE END!