Disclaimer: The characters of “Roswell” belong to Jason Katims, Melinda Metz, and 20th Century Fox.
Pairings: No pairing for Liz, Implied Rebel and Candy (Pre-polar)
Rating: Teen
Summary: Tess reaches out to Liz after Alex's traumatic death, building a bridge between three unlikely people; Tess friendly. A Liz, Tess and Michael bonding piece.
AN: Fourth in the Spoils of War Series; I highly suggest you read the other stories in the series Shattered, Stand By You and On the Run as well as the drabble/vignette series All's Fair in Love and War to fill in the gaps. Originally was meant to be a drabble but it got so long, Whims convinced me to make it a one-shot.
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Bridges
Leaning her cold, damp cheek on her knees, she stared out over her balcony numbly, clamping her lip between her teeth, shuddering violently as an image of Alex’s cold, lifeless body ripped through her once again, bringing with it an agonizing pain and deep-seeded guilt that rippled over her senses. Pressing her face into trembling hands, she choked back a sob as hot tears spilled from beneath tightly clenched eyes and hung her head between her knees to quell the sick spinning in it, drawing sharp, shallow, wheezing breaths into her lungs as panic sluiced through her bloodstream.
Digging her fingers into the side of her head as taunting voices filled her mind, she drew a sharp, rasping breath, fruitlessly trying to push the image away, gritting her teeth as it continued to swim before her vision. She had no idea how long she’d sat there, holding Alex in her arms when Valenti came into the house, having been alerted by the neighbors of her screams. She had gone into an almost catatonic state that had taken hours to snap out of; and in the end, only Michael’s harsh words broke through the void into which she’d submerged.
This was all her fault.
She may not have actually held the knife, but she had as good as sealed his fate when she changed the future because her one-time husband told her that if she didn’t, their world was going to end and everyone they loved would die. God, she had been so naïve to believe that she could have prevented anything. If she had learned anything over the years, it had been that aliens had little regard for rules, nor did Khivar have any honor.
Breath hitching painfully, she wrapped her arms around her shoulders, a dark, icy void echoing through her soul as she fixated blindly on an unseen point in the night sky, her lips and body tingling as numbness encompassed her heart. It wasn’t supposed to happen this way. She wasn’t supposed to save Michael and Isabel only to kill Alex. Oh God, where had things gone wrong?
Clenching her eyes shut, she grit her teeth as she dropped her head back into her hands, a deep , fathomless grief pouring over the whole of her, hot tears trickling down her cheeks, her brow pinching as despair ripped through her once more. Oh, God, Alex was dead and it was all her fault. It should have been her lying on that cold metal slab in the morgue. She had been the one who introduced him to this life. She had been the one who thought she could change the inevitable. She had been the one that unknowingly attracted the attention of the enemy.
And he had paid the price.
Leaning back in her chair, she stared at the stars listlessly, once a mystery that had intrigued and fascinated her, now nothing more than a bitter reminder of reincarnated kings and queens, intergalactic politics and a war they should never have had a part in. A reminder of how fleeting and fickle life and fate were. A deep rage bubbled in her gut, bile rising in her throat at the unfairness of it all and she clenched her fists against the rising tide of her powers, green light crackling over her arms as she vowed that she’d make that bastard pay for every scream of terror and drop of blood Alex had shed.
Khivar would suffer for each of those wounds if she had to die in the process. She’d see him in hell if she had to follow him down into the fiery abyss herself. She owed Alex that at the very least.
Heart pounding against her breast, she drew in several ragged breaths, desperately trying to rein in the raw power running through her system, a bitter laugh bubbling over her lips as she realized just how much she and Michael had in common; no wonder he had been the only one to get through to her that day. Unclenching her fists, she drew the crackling powers into her hands as Michael had trained her to do and sunk them onto the ground, shoving the excess energy into the cold, damp concrete below, crying out as the power lashed through her and sent the building rumbling faintly.
Panting harshly, her palms still tingling with residual power, she gasped when a shuffling sound caught her ear and raised her hand defensively, her shoulders only slumping when a familiar blond head popped into view, a cautious light reflected in deep blue eyes. Compressing her lips into a fine line, she slowly dropped her hand and silently stared at the other girl, one brow arched inquisitively.
“Impressive,” Tess commented cautiously, crawling over the balcony ledge hesitantly as she still wasn’t certain of her reception given Liz’s obvious mood and their tentative understanding since she and Max had cemented their relationship. She wasn’t exactly sure Liz would want to see her after everything, but with Maria at home with Michael and Max comforting Isabel, she figured the brunette might need someone to talk to.
“What are you doing, here?” Liz asked sullenly, crossing her arms over her chest as she stared at the petite blond who she’d love to blame for all the pain in her life, but couldn’t. She knew that Tess was no more to blame than Max for the way events had panned out, but her broken heart had a hard time listening to that piece of sage advice some days and right now, she wasn’t in the mood to socialize or play nice.
“I thought you could use a friend,” the blond replied quietly, fingering the edges of her jacket uncertainly, wondering if she were doing the right thing. It had only been eight months since Liz had pushed her towards Max, and although the brunette had been the one to initiate the rift between her and Max, something that hadn’t sat right with her from the beginning, Liz had seen his moving on as a betrayal. Yet another reason she didn’t believe the rumors of her sleeping with Kyle.
“What do you care?” the brunette spat resentfully, squeezing her hands back into fists as she fought her own energy as it flared in her body once more, searing over her nerves until she felt like she was lit up from within. Never had she felt more kinship with Michael if this was what he felt every time his emotions flared. Gritting her teeth, she fought the aching burn and unthinkingly lashed out breathlessly in her pain. “Aren’t humans distractions? Isn’t that what Nasedo preached?”
Tess snapped back as if slapped, the color draining from her cheeks at the other girl’s venomous words and wrapped her arms protectively around her middle, stunned by the viciousness of her attack despite knowing she had to remind the brunette of everything she’d lost. Licking her lips, she swallowed harshly and ran a shaky hand over her hair, smoothing the flyaway strands back and bit her lip, nodding quietly.
“I’m sorry to intrude…I just thought…” she replied huskily, clearing her throat of the slight lump that had lodged there and flashed a weak smile at the brunette as she shuffled away from her, towards the low concrete wall, trying not to feel hurt by Liz’s rebuff. She knew the girl was grieving and that made people act out of character. “I’m sorry, I’ll go.”
“Wait,” Liz called, burying her hands into her hair, scrubbing at her scalp in agitation as she once again tried to channel her powers and absorb it back into her system, whimpering when she failed once more. Lifting watery, pain-filled eyes to Tess, she drew a deep breath, her body coiling and rasped tightly “I’m sorry. The power flare is…it’s hurting me and I’m being an unfair bitch.”
Tess turned at that, running her eyes over the petite brunette, finally seeing the faint green lines dancing over her hands as she pressed them into her body, her eyes flaring with compassion as she suddenly understood the girl’s contentious attitude having seen Michael fight his own powers, as well as what she remembered of Rath in their previous life. Walking over swiftly, she sat by her side, taking her hand and tried to draw some of the power away from her, quickly dropping it when Liz cried out in agony.
“Stay,” Liz whispered, smiling weakly at the girl in front of her, her teeth tearing into her bottom lip, spilling a drop of blood over it before she licked at it absently and leaned her sweaty brow against her knees. Groaning, she once again gathered up the excess power and grounded it into the bricks at her side, her body sagging in relief when the power left her body as she whispered wearily, clinging to anything to keep the violent memories sparking her powers at bay. “I can’t stand being by myself.”
“Okay, on one condition,” Tess replied firmly, draping a blanket around Liz’s shoulders, careful not to touch her skin and potentially bring a fresh wave of pain even though she’d stopped sparking for a bit. She didn’t want to chance another flare-up. Reaching into her jacket pocket, she pulled out her cell phone, quickly searching out a number. “I’m calling Michael.”
Liz’s head shot up, worry and a hint of fear touching tear-stained, chocolate eyes as she shook her head, her protest dying off when implacable blue eyes studied her quietly, a stubborn moue quirking the other girls lips and she huffed, looking away petulantly. The last thing she wanted was to take Michael away from a grieving Maria, not to mention she was hoping to avoid the quiet lecture she was sure to get for not calling him sooner.
“No arguments,” Tess refuted, hitting the send button before Liz could offer a protest, listening as it dialed Maria’s house number, knowing that Michael was holed up there, taking care of the other blond and her mother, admonishing the brunette gently. “He told you that if your powers flared like this, you were supposed to call him so he could help you ground it.”
Turning her attention to her phone, she stepped away, speaking quietly to Michael when he picked up the phone, quickly explaining the situation and rolling her eyes when he groused over Liz’s stubborn refusal to involve him before promising to be there in about a half hour. Shutting off the phone, she turned back the brunette, happy to see that her powers had seemed to quiet for the moment as she slumped over her knees limply, a hand pressed to the back over her neck, trying to assuage the tension gathered at the base.
“Every time I close my eyes I see him, staring at me, so filled with horror,” she whispered brokenly, her body tensing once more as the vision flashed across her mind and she clenched her teeth, fighting back the hot, anguished tears that threatened to spill over at any moment. Pressing her hand to her forehead, she fixed glassy, dark eyes on an unseen point and groaned helplessly. “Oh God, this is all my fault.”
“No, no, no…this was not your fault,” Tess refuted, scrambling to the girl’s side, grasping her hand unconsciously, flinching when she realized what she had done, but retaining her hold when it became obvious that it wasn’t causing her any pain. Rubbing the back of her hand, she pushed the hair back from Liz’s face, her heart aching for the other girl’s misguided guilt. “Khivar…”
“Yes, it is,” Liz refuted hollowly, dull brown eyes staring off into the distance as the night Future Max came back to tell her that she had to end their relationship in order to keep their friends and family safe came to mind, a bitter laugh bubbling over her lips as she trailed off and bit her lip, remembering she wasn’t alone. “If I hadn’t…”
“Hadn’t what?” Tess prompted, biting back a sigh of frustration as she watched Liz’s eyes blank, slipping behind that immovable wall that she’d built around herself over the past eight months since she and Max had their falling out. She was getting tired of this stonewall of hers and wasn’t going to put up with it anymore. There was a reason behind her actions and if it was alien related, as she suspected it was, she and the others needed to know before it was too late.
“Nothing,” Liz muttered listlessly, trying to pull back from the other girl, her lips compressing when Tess refused to relinquish the hold on her hand, blue and brown eyes clashing fiercely when the blond wouldn’t back down. Wrenching her gaze from Tess, she inhaled sharply when she felt that familiar tingle in her body indicating her powers were stirring once more and she groaned, muscles coiling in anticipation of the burn.
“Does this have anything to do with why you pretended to sleep with Kyle to push Max away?” Tess pressed, feeling slightly bad that she was badgering the girl when she was still so tightly wound, but refusing to back down as she had a feeling that whatever secret she was keeping was pivotal in her current power struggle. Winging a brow at the brunette’s fearful glance, she held up a hand to stave off her pretty lies with an impatient wave. “Don’t lie to me, Liz, I know better. You may have fooled Max for a bit, but you can’t fool me.”
“You can’t tell him!” Liz cried hoarsely, gabbing at Tess’s other arm, shocking the blond with the desperate vehemence in her tone as she grappled for hold on Tess’s remaining hand. Staring at her intently, lips trembling and eyes wild, Liz drew a panicked breath, her heart pounding further, sending her powers up another notch as she begged quietly. “Promise me, Tess; promise me that you’ll never mention your suspicions to Max. It’s imperative that he thinks it’s real. Otherwise this would have all been for nothing.”
“Liz…” Tess chided, the other girl’s unusual reaction making her own heart pick up in tempo, her breath catching and a chill snaking over her spine at the sheer terror and anguish radiating throughout her small frame, her eyes so wide, she thought they might actually pop out their sockets. What on Earth could have prompted this reaction? Or maybe, she thought darkly, the problem wasn’t of this Earth at all.
“Promise me,” Liz demanded, her fingers tightening on the blonde’s hands unconsciously in her effort to make her comply with this request, panic sluicing through her veins at the thought that telling Max could start a horrifying chain reaction from which they’d never recover, since Future Max was adamant about him not knowing. Licking her lips nervously, her eyes darted over the balcony for a moment as she gathered her thoughts before flicking back to Tess beseechingly. “Please.”
Tess watched her quietly, her heart seizing at the panic and anguish so visible in the brunette’s eyes, and drew a deep breath, anger simmering in her gut towards whatever had put that look in the other girl’s eyes and vowed that she’d see their enemies in hell before she allowed anything happen to her friends, if that’s what caused it. Mulling it over in her head as silence stretched between them, she firmed her shoulders and nodded, making a condition of her own. “Only if you tell me why you did it.”
Liz and Tess stared at each other, assessing the other silently for several moments, each fearful that the other would turn away once everything was said and done between them; especially Liz as she knew she was about to rock the other girl’s happy bubble, and that the news she had to impart would either build a necessary bridge or rent the fragile relationship to pieces. Would they be able to deal with the potential fall out?
“Okay. Okay, but what I am about to show you,” Liz agreed, her voice slightly strangled as she gripped Tess’s hands, fear and worry dancing in her eyes as she asserted firmly, trying to impart with her actions just how serious she was about her silence on the matter. “You can’t tell Max, Isabel or Kyle. At least not right now. Michael, Maria and Alex are the only ones that know. Please, just…don’t say anything until I’m finished.”
Liz watched as Tess closed her eyes, a felt a faint ripple of power as the blonde’s aura brushed against hers, seeking permission to connect on the intimate level needed to share these kinds of memories. Sucking a deep breath, her heart panging with remorse at what she was about to reveal, she closed her own eyes, sinking into a pool of power and opened her mind to the hybrid, giving her access to scenes she never wanted to see.
*flash*
“The closer that you and I grew, the worse it got with Tess, and eventually she left
Roswell,” an older Max whispered, his eyes filled with sorrow as he stared over his shoulder at a shell-shocked Liz, heart pounding in her chest, stomach clenching in disbelief as her head swum with all of the earth-shattering news he’d imparted of a world lost. Shaking her head, she stared at the wall blankly, her fingers tingling with numbness as pain ripped through her soul, the veil she’d so giddily wrapped around her head fluttering forlornly to the floor.
“Why don't you just go to Tess?” she asked hoarsely, her eyes filling with tears as she stared at the husband she’d never have and barely quelled the anguished sob constricting her chest, despair radiating throughout her entire being, all of her dreams turned to dust as he replied sadly. “It's you I trust. It's you I have faith in, and because it's not just about getting me close to Tess. I need you to help me fall out of love with you.”
*flash*
Liz walked down the stairs and into the employee lounge in a daze, reeling at the complete devastation of her life in…had it only been a couple of days? Running a hand over her hair, she jumped when a guffaw caught her ear and she walked slowly to the diamond-shaped window that looked out into the dining room, her heart lurching as she spied Michael and Isabel talking and laughing at the counter, Max’s words reverberating through her head.
“Just twenty-five minutes before I came here, I held Michael in my arms...dead. Isabel died two weeks before that. Now you have to do this.” Swallowing thickly, she compressed her lips together as fresh tears sprung into her eyes and she averted them to get her emotions in check before flicking them back to the hybrids and squared her shoulders, knowing what needed to be done no matter how painful.
*flash*
Liz laughed at Kyle, her head thrown back, mouth open wide, feeling the vise in her chest loosen for the first time since Future Max had landed on her balcony to tell her that the one thing she had come to count on as the only good thing in her life had actually caused the end of the world as they knew it and she grinned at the boy, about to answer him when a shuffle caught her ear. Swinging her head around, she caught Max’s shattered gaze as he stood at the window, concert tickets falling from a limp hand as he staggered back with a disbelieving shake of his head, before storming off into the night.
Numbness fell over her as she watched him retreat, staggering to fire escape and quickly disappearing over the ledge, a heart-wrenching ache icing her heart as her deception did it’s dirty work and she gave a strangled cry, wrenching away from Kyle’s concerned grip, running to her bathroom and sinking to the floor to cry at the unfairness.
*flash*
Liz’s heart cracked as she watched the love of her life creep even closer until his and Tess’s lips were inches apart, hovering together as he cupped her face gently, his eyes shimmering with tears and a contentment she’d never seen in this life
She ripped her gaze away for a second, eyes filling with tears as pain ripped through her heart before being drawn back to the scene inside, her heart plummeting as Max’s lips brushed over the petite blonde’s reverently and then pulled back for a moment, before he sunk into her mouth, deepening the caress as Tess’s lips parted. Biting back a sob she looked on a moment longer, in awe at how beautiful they looked together and heartbroken as all her dreams crashed around her for the final time.
*flash*
Liz staggered over to the gravestone, staring at the words marking her friend’s life numbly and thinking at just how inadequate they were at describing the true spirit of Alex and shook as a sob bubbled over her lips, the cold, acidic burn of guilt clenching her gut as she recalled Future Max’s accounting of their wedding reception. “You called Maria, Michael, Isabel, and Alex, and had them meet us halfway. We spent the whole night singing and dancing in some dive outside Phoenix.” Stumbling back, she tipped her head back to the sky, raging internally at the world and heavens and anyone that would listen at the way things had turned out. This wasn’t supposed to happen. It was all her fault.
*flash*
“Oh God,” Tess gasped as she came to, her eyes widening in horror as the images raced before her eyes, Liz’s last anguished thoughts reverberating in her head as she drew several shaky breaths, her eyes filling with tears as she shunted aside the Future Max implications and focused on the last scene, croaking hoarsely. “No, no, I won’t let you blame yourself for that. There is no way you could have known. And you damn well know that Alex would be the first one to tell you this.”
“But…” Liz whispered, shaking as her powers began another slow spike, electricity dancing over her arms as the memories crashed over her heavily once more, trailing off as she heard heavy steps climbing the fire escape and shot Tess a helpless expression. Flicking her gaze to the wall, she sighed with relief and yet cringed when Michael hurtled over, his lips thinning when he took in her emotional state.
“I thought I told you to call me if it got this bad,” he stated in a low, controlled voice as he crossed over to her quickly, kneeling in front of her and gently pried her hands from Tess’s, shunting the blond aside as he met Liz’s eyes impatiently, stroking the backs of her hands, tapping into the power skittering just under the surface, drawing it into him.
“Maria…” Liz began, cutting her words off when dark honey eyes flicked up impatiently once more, his brow winging as he continued to siphon off the excess power, shaping it into something more useful and feeding it back into her so she didn’t drain herself completely, cutting in brusquely. “Is grieving, but fine. You aren’t.”
Sliding his hands over her arms, he began to work some of the tension out of stiff muscles, all the while still drawing out the power crackling under and on her skin until he reached her shoulders. Cupping the back of her neck with one hand, he pressed the other to her brow, pushing back her hair as he met her gaze questioningly, moving his fingers to her temple when she nodded and sent a soft wash of power through her head, pushing away the flashes that threatened to rise and catching her as she went limp in his arms.
“Get the window, will you?” he commanded softly, glancing over at the still shattered and stunned blond sitting beside him, softening his brusque tone with a fleeting quirk of his lips as he gathered a now unconscious Liz into his arms and stood. Tess scurried over and opened it, standing back to let Michael pass through before climbing in herself.
“What did you do?” she managed to choke out as she watched Michael slide Liz into bed, the boy oddly at home in the brunette’s bedroom, making her wonder how many times Liz had been through one of these episodes, but hadn’t mentioned it to the group, her mind still reeling, unable to grasp everything she’d learned tonight. Yet one more secret that the brunette had kept, likely, in her mind, to protect them all.
“I…uh…essentially put her to sleep,” Michael explained hesitantly, scratching at his brow as he shrugged and grabbed the blankets at the foot of the bed, draping them over the other girl before facing Tess. “Her emotions were too heightened for me to help her ground them. This way, she’ll sleep for several hours and tomorrow morning I can take her out to practice some more.”
Tess stared at the sleeping girl, her brow furrowing as the flashes came back to mind and she frowned, running a hand over her hair as she tried to make sense of it all, trying not to feel devastated over the toll her happiness had taken on Liz. Heart sinking, she pressed a hand to her eyes wearily, torn with wanting to go and rage at Max for being so insensitive, although it wasn’t this Max’s fault and wanting to curl up and cry for the pain she’d inadvertently caused so many. But neither was an option at this point.
“She told you,” Michael guessed as he watched the blond girl quietly, nodding as the tears in her eyes confirmed his suspicions and he shifted uncomfortably, not quite what to say or do in the wake of Tess’s anger and disillusionment.
“Yeah, I kinda didn’t give her a choice,” she lofted bitterly, lips pressing together to quell the angry, bitter tirade that threatened to erupt every time she the vision of Liz crying on the floor of her bathroom, alone and heartbroken flashed through her mind. Facing Michael, she opened and closed her mouth several times before words would come, asking in disbelief. “How could he do that to her?”
“He was desperate, or so she says,” Michael shrugged, his tone hard and angry itself, implying that he didn’t think there was any good reason for Max to have put the sole responsibility of this task on the shoulders of the girl in question, muttering scathingly. “Told her that the world came to an end but the refused to explain himself. Different time, same Max. We should go. Let her sleep this off.”
“Yeah,” Tess sighed wearily, running a hand through her hair as she spun around, yawning as fatigue settled over her as the emotionally intense night finally caught up to her and was headed for the open window when she felt his hand rest on her shoulder. Looking over her shoulder, she was surprised to see him regarding her thoughtfully, a small smile sliding over her lips as he nodded to Liz and offered. “You should come tomorrow, I think she’d like that. She wouldn’t have told you if she didn’t trust you.”
