Numb (DA, XO, UC, Adult) Chp 10 , 10/22/11 [WIP]

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Numb (DA, XO, UC, Adult) Chp 10 , 10/22/11 [WIP]

Post by Traitor » Mon May 10, 2010 4:14 pm

Title: Numb
Author: Traitor
Category: DA X-over, X-tremer
Timeline: Post-Graduation, Post-Love in Vein
Rating: Adult for strong language and dark subject matter
Disclaimer: I do not own nor do I have any association with anything Roswell or Dark Angel related. Don’t sue…cause I have no money and that would be bad.
Summary: Tragedy and heartbreak have followed the Pod Squad for to long. Two years ago, after the group had been on the road for a year, Maria and Liz went to Seattle. Now their just trying to get by…Liz more so than Maria.
Authors Note: I began posting this story over 5 years ago on RoswellFanatics, but real life got ahold of me for a few years and I was never able to finsh it. I'm starting over posting and I promise I will finish it this time!
Dedication: For everyone who read this and gave me so much support the first time around. I’m finishing this for you.


Roswell Fanatics Round 14:

ImagePrologue: Not what I seem

Gotta keep running.

I can hear the crunch of the snow beneath my heavy boot-clad feet. It hurts to move, it hurts to breathe but I force myself onwards, never looking back.

One step, then another.

I’m a goddamned solider! Running through the snow shouldn’t be this hard. In fact, it should be a piece of cake, a walk in the park. But of course, the fact that I have a gaping bullet wound just millimeters above my heart could attribute to my unusual sluggishness.

Yet still I press on – pushing past the blazing white fire burning in my chest – and never once do I look down. If I look down, I know I’ll see the snow under and behind me, absorbing the dark crimson of my blood…and that would make this whole thing real.


My whole body is becoming numb from a combination of hypothermia and blood loss. I know that it will be over soon. At least then I can see Jack and whoever else didn’t make it out tonight.

Wait though.

Do Transgenics go up to the Blue Lady or are do we simply…disappear?

The gun that I’ve been holding tightly in my left hand suddenly becomes to heavy and it slips from my fingers, disappearing under the mountain of snow.

My knees give away.

My eyes get heavy.

I feel like my world is going up in flames. My dreams of freedom are fading too, dying with me.

The snow caves in around me as I fall to my knees.

Every breath feels like fire scorching my lungs.

Then suddenly I’m on my back, looking up at the star covered sky. Faintly, I can hear the sounds of gunfire on the other side of the perimeter fence. I wonder how many are dying right now. Just like me.

I can feel the blood and snow soaking my clothes. Damn…it’s so cold.

I blink heavily.

At least I’ll die like a solider.

With one last shaky breath, my world implodes around me.


“Liz! Liz!”

Liz Parker bolted upright, sweat dripping down her face and into her eyes, stinging on contact. Her hair was stuck to her face and shoulders, soaking wet. Maria DeLuca, Liz’s best friend and roommate, sat across the room on the edge of her bed, staring at Liz with obvious concern. She had been awakened by her friends screams to ‘Make the pain go away’.

Liz eagerly gulped air into her oxygen starved lungs. The memory of her dream flashed back into her mind. Despite how unbelievably hot she was, Liz shivered.

“Are you okay, Chica?” Maria asked, her eyes trained firmly on Liz’s shaking form.

Liz couldn’t help but let out a dry chuckle. Was she okay? Now that was a loaded question. She supposed it depended on what your definition of okay was.

“I’m peachy, ‘Ria.” Liz reassured her friend. “It was just a nightmare…a really bad nightmare.”

Maria raised an eyebrow and shot Liz a knowing look. Liz flinched underneath her fierce gaze, giving Maria all the conformation she needed.

Maria turned over and grabbed a green pill bottle from her nightstand, one of the many that lined the table. She glanced at the label, just to make sure she had taken the right one, and then threw it across the room to Liz. Liz caught it in her hand and smiled.

“Just don’t take too many this time.” Maria warned, before she rolled over and fell back asleep.

Liz rolled the bottle in her hands, loving the way the pills rattled in their container. Before long she heard the heavy even breaths coming from Maria and she smiled. Now she was alone in the dark with nothing but bad memories and those blissful little pills.
Last edited by Traitor on Sat Oct 22, 2011 9:39 pm, edited 19 times in total.

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Re: Numb (DA, XO, UC, Adult) Chapter 1

Post by Traitor » Tue May 11, 2010 9:05 pm


Thank you for the feedback and I hope you enjoy the next part!

Chapter 1: Slowly Slipping Away

When she was younger, her mother and father had taught her all about the afterlife, about God and Heaven and Hell, and for the longest time, she’d believed in it all. She’d trusted in the fact that if she was good, she would go to Heaven.

But her faith in things wasn’t what it used to be.

The very idea that God and Heaven existed on any level at all seemed ridiculous to her now. She stopped believing in them when Max had started pulling rank, making rash decisions, and dragging her down with him every step of the way, never once letting her breathe. She stopped believing when the Pod Squad had all split up nearly two years prior.

Hell – now that was something she still believed in. In fact, she was 100% certain that it existed. Because this - living here in this place, breathing past the pain, simply existing - was Hell. That she was sure of.

Liz broke from her musings and stretched lazily. She wanted to sleep, but her body refused to comply. In the real world, she had to deal with the pain of existence. In sleep, she was numb – blissfully unfeeling and finished. Or at least she had been until those damn memories started invading her dreams. For eleven years she’d pushed them aside but now it seemed that evading them wouldn’t work anymore.

The faint sounds of music hit Liz’s ears and she smirked to herself. Maria was in the living room, singing up a storm to an old Kelly Clarkson song. The words echoed through the walls and Liz listened intently.

Now I can’t breathe.
No I can’t sleep.
I’m barely hanging on.

She knew every word by heart. The song dated back to several years before the Pulse had hit, but it had been one of her favorites as a teenager – Thanks to Maria and her eclectic taste in music. It had even become her own personal anthem after Max had started to act like he had. No, she thought while shaking her head, she would not start thinking about Max right now. Thinking about him made her need the pills and she really didn’t need to take anymore than she had to. God knows she was already addicted; she didn’t need to make it worse for herself.

A sudden pain momentarily flared in her chest and Liz clutched at her heart, at a phantom wound that had healed when she was still a child. Funny how old wounds can fade physically but the pain left in its wake remains all the same – always choosing to surface when you are at your most vulnerable. That’s what she was at this point too. Vulnerable. Liz could thank the seemingly constant string of flashbacks and her Max moments for that.

The bedroom door jerked open and Liz looked up from the bedspread to see Maria standing in the doorway. Liz took in the petite blonde’s appearance: her hair was curly and loose, falling just past her shoulders, she wore more make-up than usual, and her short black leather skirt left little to the imagination. There was only one place that Maria would dare go dressed like that. She glanced at the clock for conformation – 7:15, almost time to get to work at, what Liz and Maria affectionately called, BT aka The Blowfish Tavern.

Maria grinned and ran towards Liz. She dove on the bed and let out a tiny squeal as she went.

Liz didn’t say anything at first, but merely let her eyes travel down Maria’s arms, which were covered by the sleeves of her cheap imitation leather jacket. She couldn’t see the green sparks of energy, but she knew they were there because Maria seemed to wince every time she hit her arms the wrong way.

“How’s the energy level this morning?”

The first signs of Maria’s change had started to develop nearly a week prior. They had both been at work at BT when Maria started wincing in pain and rubbing her arms. Liz had recognized the signs and gotten her out of there, making excuses to Bernardo, their boss, that Maria was coming down with something. The blonde could blame her newly hybrid status on a nasty fall that she had been involved in about 3 months after they group had left Roswell. She’d cracked her skull open and was in pretty bad shape so Max had to heal her – thus relinquishing Maria of her position as the only human left in the group.

Maria frowned. “Comes and goes,” she mumbled, rubbing up and down her arms. “I’ve pretty much gotten it under control now. There are still moments where it hurts like hell though.”

That’s an understatement, Liz thought bitterly to herself as she glanced out the window at the gray night sky. She thought back to her own change just over three years ago. It had started with fire, then the fever, then those damned energy streams shooting through her skin. She of all people knew how painful the process could be. Surprisingly though, Maria was handling it all quite well-better than Kyle had anyway. Liz tore her eyes away from the sky and looked back at Maria. She nodded sympathetically at her best friend. “If it gets to be to much, I can try and heal it.”

Maria reached out her hand and grabbed Liz’s. She shook her head, blonde hair waving about as she did, and locked eyes with Liz. “If you can heal things so easily, maybe you should try focusing on healing yourself.”

Liz sighed heavily and ran a hand through her long, matted up hair. She was tired of having this conversation with Maria. No, scratch that. She was just plain tired. Every day it was the same and Liz’s answer never changed.

“Healing a soul is beyond even my powers, Maria. It’s not possible. Mine will just have to stay broken.” It was a depressing thing to say, she knew that, but it was the truth. If Maria couldn’t handle that…well so be it.

“Well popping pills certainly isn’t going to fix it!,” Maria snapped, her eyes flashing with a brief spark of anger. She suddenly paled and hung her head. “I’m sorry Chica. I-I’m just worried about you is all. If something happens to you then I’m alone. You’re the only family I have left and I can’t loose you too.”

Liz’s head cocked to the side and she narrowed her eyes, studying Maria for a moment before speaking. “It’s alright. You aren’t going to loose me, you know that it’s just..”

“But what if the people from Manticore find you, Liz?” Maria said, cutting her off in mid sentence. Her eyes glazed over, filled with tears.

“Manticore is gone, Maria,” Liz soothed. “The government may be looking for me but there’s no way they can track me down.” She paused and placed a finger under Maria’s chin, tilting it up slightly so that the blonde would look her in the eye. “I’m. Not. Going. Anywhere.”

Maria nodded dumbly and they two sat on Liz’s bed for a moment in complete silence. Maria’s eyes brightened and she glared at Liz, her eyes narrowed suspiciously. “Hey! Why aren’t you ready for work? Bernardo will flip if you don’t show.”

Liz chuckled. When all else failed, Maria would change the subject. She smiled mischievously. “Ah, ah, ah,” Liz tisked, waving a finger in Maria’s face. “You have to work tonight. Bernardo gave me the night off.”

I’m the one who goes all Green Lantern last week and he gives you the night off?! Un-fucking-believable! Why?”

Liz smiled, absently thinking back to the other day when Bernardo had cornered her in the back room and started scolding her. “He mumbled something about labor laws and me suing him. And then something about a judge siding with me ‘cause I have a cute ass. Anyways, I guess he thinks I’m working up there to much. When the boss man tells me to take a break, I do not complain.”

“Lucky Bitch,” Maria teased rolling her eyes.

Liz’s eyes widened as she feigned outrage. She grabbed one of the pillows from behind her back and flung it at Maria, who let out a piercing squeal as she dodged it. Moments like this between Maria and herself were few and far between these days. She cherished moments like this when they would just laugh. She almost felt like she did before the alien mess had infiltrated their lives.

“Speaking of lucky bitches, Weren’t you supposed to go out with Claire earlier?”

“She got all pissed off at me, as usual. I had to cancel because of work tonight.”

Liz gagged, showing her contempt for Maria’s latest fling. After the group had split up and gone their separate ways, Maria had sworn off men – human or any other kind. She told Liz that putting up with Michael for five years was enough to make her turn to women. Liz didn’t mind, she still loved her best friend. But back to the subject of Claire, Liz hated her. She was rude, obnoxious, and to be blunt, a straight up ho.

“I don’t know why you bother messing with her.”

“You know,” Maria purred, batting her eyelashes in an obviously fake flirtation. “I mess with her because you don’t seem to like entertaining the thought of me and you sharing a bed.”

“Eww! God ‘Ria!” Liz shrieked. “Max Evans may have scared me on the men front but I am still very much heterosexual. Besides, I love you and I’d do anything for you…but I won’t do that.”

“Such a pity,” Maria sighed, “wasting such a pretty piece of flesh like yourself on the spawn of Satan. Men…blach!”

Liz suppressed a laugh and glanced quickly at the clock on her bedside table. She groaned, realizing how long they’d been talking. “You need to go. Get out before Bernardo fires your skinny ass!”

Maria looked at the clock and yelped. She jumped up quickly, as if something had bitten her, and ran to the door, trying desperately to straighten her skirt as she went. Silly Maria, Liz thought, the skirt was going to rip off completely if she kept tugging on it like that. When Maria reached the door, she paused and looked at Liz. The playfulness in her eyes had disappeared only to be replaced by hardened concern. Liz sighed, bracing herself for the inevitable.

“J-Just don’t go after the pills again Liz. Please?”

“Gotcha, my lady. Paws of the pills!”

“Not funny,” Maria growled. “I’m serious.”

Liz nodded and watched her friend disappear with a less than satisfied look written across her pale features. Once she heard the heavy door to the apartment click shut, she let out a shaky breath. Maria was understandably upset because Liz hadn’t promised; Liz hadn’t promised because she knew it was a promise she couldn’t and/or wouldn’t keep.

Liz clutched again at her heart.

Maria just didn’t seem to realize how much it killed her to simply live through each day. The strong confident Liz Parker from Roswell was gone, only to be replaced with an inferior product; weak and breakable. She felt alone most of the time, even when Maria was with her.

She was broken….there was no other way to put it. It wasn’t simple, it wasn’t pretty, it was just the truth.

Now, Liz thought, to find that Vicoden.

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Re: Numb (DA, XO, UC, Adult) Ch. 2

Post by Traitor » Wed May 19, 2010 8:20 pm

Thanks to everyone for the feedback. I'm glad people remember this story and want to see it finished. I've had a lot of fun working on it over the years and I hope this will help me finish it! Keep the feedback coming people, it makes me write faster!

Sorry it took so long for an update, but I just started my summer semester at school and I have to put that before writing. So, without further interruption, I give you chapter 2.

Chapter 2: I’ll Always Find You

She could hear her heart pounding against her chest. She could feel the blood pulsing through her veins. In the silence that surround her, Liz’s senses peaked. The noises were almost deafening and the feelings almost painful.

Liz leaned against the cracked white porcelain sink in the tiny bathroom of her apartment. One hand was placed on either side of the fixture for support as she stared down at the tiny pill bottle sitting next to the rusty faucet. That bottle, so seemingly insignificant of an object, was empty not, filled with nothing but air. Empty. Empty because she had swallowed the last of the pain killers that had been contained in it. Empty because she hadn’t been strong enough to resist taking them. They, the pills, seemed to have called to her, ‘Just a little bit Liz. Just a little bit more and the pain will all go away. It will all float away. That is what you want isn’t it? We will make you numb. Just a little bit more.’

That is what she wanted – that numb feeling. She’d needed it, craved it, and so she’d taken the pills.

A grim smile crossed over her lips. Maria had warned her, hadn’t she? ‘No good can come out of you sitting in the dark popping pills. Bad things are gonna happen if you do this when you’re alone.’ That’s what Maria had told her, days, weeks, months ago. She chuckled bitterly to herself. As usual, she had chosen not to listen to other people’s advice. She had trusted in herself to make the calls on what was and was not good for her. Yeah, that had been really smart. Now, because of her obstinate nature, she had given in and taken, hell, maybe 15 or 20 pills all at once. Liz was shaking and horribly scared – and emotion that was very hard to evoke from her. She had never taken such a large about in such a short period of time before. Liz had no way of knowing exactly how high her tolerance level was.

What if she overdosed?

If she overdosed, she imagined that the effects would set in quickly, even for a transgenic-alien hybrid.
Liz shuddered violently. Maybe this time everything wouldn’t be okay. Maybe this time she had toed the line a little to carelessly and gone to far.

The small gold clock that hung on the wall kept catching her attention.

Tick. Tick. Tick.

It was mocking her.

Tick. Tick. Tick.

You’re running out of time.

Every second that went by was painful, reminding her that she was loosing precious time. It had bee two-and-a-half minuets since she had swallowed the pills. The moment of truth would be soon-judgment time, live or die. She imagined the pills dissolving in her stomach, entering her blood stream, choking her heart until the heavy thuds faded into nothing but silence. Her hand rose up to her mouth of its own accord, ready to force herself to expel the vial things from her system.

But she couldn’t do it.

A part of her, a very small part but enough of one to make an impact, was screaming at her that this was the way out. She had wanted it to be over for so long now that it almost seemed like the Blue Lady was granting her wish. She just wanted peace-rest. She lowered her hand. With this outlook on the situation, if she did overdose, it was basically a suicide, a cowards way out. Yet Liz didn’t care anymore.

Liz’s dark brown eyes strayed from the clock to the small, dirty mirror that hung above the sink. She felt physically sick when she caught her reflection. To the untrained eye, Liz Parker looked almost exactly the same as she did when she left Roswell – her hair was a little longer and had dark blue streaks in it, her eyebrow and her nose was pierced. A little rough around the edges but still the same girl…until you looked in her eyes.

Liz’s eyes had always been her sort of trademark. They were large, soulful, and impossibly deep. They also gave away her every emotion. Zack used to scold her about how she needed to learn to, in a sense, shield them so that she wasn’t so vulnerable. Brown eyes had flickered, sparkled – they had been beautiful. Now though, it was as if there was nothing behind them. There was no spark, no light, no playfulness, there was simply a dark vacant abyss. She chuckled dryly. Zack would be so proud.

Unable to analyze herself anymore, she tore her eyes away and looked down at the empty bottle. She extended her shaking hand and wrapped her fingers tightly around the plastic. Liz picked it up and examined it as a large bubble of rage sprang to the surface. Her grip on the bottle tightened the rage, beautiful hate and contempt, coursed through her. Her palm seered as the plastic bubbled and melted within her hand, falling drip by drip into a puddle at her feet. Liz screamed, louder than she’d ever screamed before. The screamed burned her vocal cords but she ignored it. The outburst was long overdue – she’d held it in for to long. God, it hurt so badly.

Liz sobbed as she fell, her legs underneath her, onto the tile floor. She yelled, letting years of pent up emotions spring forth – she cried for her family, she cried for her friends, she cried for Max, and she cried for herself. Then she began to feel cold, the kind of cold that seeped into your skin and bit at your bones. She didn’t like the cold – it was the one thing that really and truly frightened her.

This was how it always ends. It creeps up on me and pulls me into the ice. It happened when I was 10 and fell in the escape and it happened when I was shot in the café 5 years ago. It’s death. It’s happening again and it’s taking me this time. Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. No one to save me this time. No Ben, no Max, just the cold.

Liz’s body shuddered and the whole world went into slow motion as her head hit the floor.

Cold, Icy fingers, clawed at her heart as she felt it begin to slow. Her normally high body temperature was beginning to plummet as well. She could feel it, seeping into her soul, freezing every inch of her with it’s frosty touch. This was what she had wanted wasn’t it? To feel nothing, to be numb? Numb, yes. Cold, no.

Funny how when we get what we want, it’s never quite what we expected it to be.

Liz’s breath hitched, her eyes closed.


Tiny fingers entwine with my own. Max. I know who it is without even looking. She and I have always shared this strong connection, a sort of bond – Max likes to say that we’re blood sisters. I really couldn’t tell you. We like to pretend we are though.

She shuffles her feet nervously beside me and her grip on my hand tightens. We’re just standing here, looking at the one tiny little beat of moonlight that had manages to filter in through that joke of a window about 10 feet above us.

“They’ll probably take more of us next. Jack was the first but I doubt he’ll be the last. We have to get out of here,” Max says with a fierce determination that mirrors my own. We’ve always been the strong ones, Maxie and me. We’ve always been the ones that stood up for the others. We’re the only ones that have ever dared to talk back to Zack and we’re the only ones who have ever smarted off to Lydecker. We only did that once though because he stuck me in isolation for a week as punishment. I didn’t like it there. It was to cold, to lonely. I don’t want to go back to that place.

I shift, still clutching Max’s hand in my own, and look over at her. She stares at me, large brown eyes meeting an almost exact copy. She’s looking at me like I have all the answers, like I can solve all of her problems. I should scoff, or laugh, or something. I don’t know a damn thing. I’m just as scared and clueless as she is.

“Max, I whisper. “How are we going to do that? There are more guards than we can dare to take on and Lydecker…”

“We’re stronger than Deck and you know it!” Max hisses, cutting me off mid-sentence. Her grip on my hand tightens and a brief spark of anger snakes across her eyes. “If we stick together then we could do it.”

I sigh and break our staring contest. I look back to the window and focus on that one lonely streak of light. I can see every little particle of dust filtering within it. It’s mesmerizing, almost magical.

“Alright. But we don’t do anything until Zack gives the word.” The words leave my mouth before I even realize what I’m saying. I just conceded to an escape from the only home I’ve ever known. Great, just great.

“Just promise me, Max,” I whisper. My gaze flickers back to her and we lock eyes. This is a serious. A promise between us is sacred, it’s a pact. “Promise me that if we get out, if Zack gives us the order to scatter, promise me that you’ll find me when the time comes.” I inhale slowly. “I don’t think that I could make it out there alone. Not without you.”

“I promise,” Max says sternly. Her voice is full of conviction. I know she means what she’s saying. “As long as I’m alive I’ll look for you. I’ll find you.”

“Even in the dark? Will you find me there Max?”

“Even in the dark I’ll find you. That’s a promise.”

I sigh, momentarily content. My sister and I are a team, now more than ever. Nothings going to tear us apart. Nothing.


I never thought that silence could be so horrible. That’s the only thing I hear. Silence. For a moment, I think I’m dead. I mean, I should be dead by now, shouldn’t I? But the cold seeps back into my body and I shiver. Nope, not dead, but close…maybe I was dead for a few minutes but not now.

Why can’t I hear anything?

Wait, there’s something! It’s close, but it’s muffled. A voice, a very familiar voice, is calling my name. It’s becoming clearer and clearer with every passing moment.

I struggle. Yes! Go to that voice. It’ll help you, keep you grounded, keep you safe.
I oblige and force myself to open my eyes. It hurts and it’s hard to do. My eyelashes have frozen to my cheeks. God, how long have I been out here?

“I let them get you. We left you behind and you were still alive! We could’ve saved you. I could’ve saved you.” It’s Ben. I’d know that voice anywhere. I would smile if only I had the strength. Sweet Ben – my big brother. “I let them kill you. You died to protect us.”

His words finally sink in and I realize that he thinks that I’m dead. You’re a transgenic, Ben! Can’t you hear my heartbeat? I don’t care how faint it is…don’t you hear it? It’s there, slow but there. I’m here, Ben. I’m here.

I summon every once of strength I have and part my lips, willing the words to come. They do, but it’s weak, barely above a whisper. “Ben?”

I watch as he raises his head and looks at me in stunned silence.

“Eva? Eva!” he yelps, his eyes sparkling with excitement.

I shudder in the cold. My chest hurts, but not as badly as before. The sub-zero temperatures must have flowed my blood circulation to where I’m not bleeding as profusely as I was. I’m still in pretty bad shape though – that’s a given.

“Help,” I manage to squeak out.

My eyes close of their own accord. I’m tired again, so tired. I feel momentarily happy that Ben found me, but then that happiness fades.

Ben found me.

Not Max.

“Even in the dark, I’ll find you. I promise. I promise.” She broke her word. Am I forgotten so easily?


Maria hummed to herself as she locked the apartment door behind her. She kicked off her black heels, sending them crashing into the wall with a loud thump, and she threw her keys onto the coffee table in the living room.

“Lizzie! Oh Lizzie!” she cried energetically. Liz never slept much, so Maria doubted she would be causing a disturbance.

She listened.

She waited.

No reply.
No reply.

Maria swallowed the lump that was beginning to form in her throat. Her chest tightened as nothing but silence greeted her ears. This is not good, she thought. Not good, not good, not good.

Her feet pounded loudly on the oak floors as she ran to the bedroom that she shared with Liz.


Something in the corner of her eye caught her attention, a light. The bathroom, she realized. The pills, she thought sickeningly.

Maria didn’t think she had ever moved that fast in her life. When she reached the open door, she sobbed. Liz was lying on the floor in a heap, her skin a sickly ashen color.

Maria fell to her knees and grabbed Liz’s wrist, searching frantically for a pulse. It was there, slow and just barely, but it was there.

“Come on Liz!” she screamed, shaking Liz furiously. “Don’t leave me! I-I can’t do this. I can’t heal, Liz! You have to wake up! Wake up!!”

She attempted to pull herself together and fumbled in her pocket for her small cell phone. She couldn’t heal Liz, it wasn’t one of her powers, so she did the only thing she could do. She broke the cardinal rule.

"911. What is your emergency?"

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Re: Numb (DA, XO, UC, Adult) Ch. 3 6/8

Post by Traitor » Tue Jun 08, 2010 6:30 pm

Sorry I'm late with an update guys. I've got three weeks of summer term left and then I'm out for two months so the updates to this and Possession should come a little more swiftly.

Thanks to Synera, AlysLuv, and rachelg224 for the feedback. Now, I need more feedback, people! It is my own little drug and it makes me happy!

Chapter 3: Falls on Me

What if she doesn’t make it? Maria thought absently as she watched the Paramedics open the ambulance doors. She stared, wide-eyed and un-blinking, as the two men, she thought their names were Eric and Travis, jump out of the back, pulling an unconscious Liz out on the gurney behind them. Maria stepped out of the ambulance carefully and followed behind them silently. She felt detached. She knew she was moving, yet she couldn’t feel it, she wasn’t conscious of it. It was like an out of body experience. She followed behind like a ghost.

They walked swiftly to the hospital doors. Maria glanced up at the bold lettering above the entryway and flinched. Harbor Lights. She and Liz had heard about the incident that had happened there nearly two weeks prior. Apparently they had gotten their hands on a real-life transgenic. They had tried to keep it quiet that the girl had gotten away, but Liz had dug around and had found out anyway. Maria cringed at the thought of being captured. No, she thought. That cannot and will not happen. We’ve got powers to protect us.

The doors of the hospital were being held open by a pretty young doctor, Maria guessed she was in her late twenties, with dark hair and a dark complexion. They speed through the open doors and Maria cast a quick glance at the woman’s nametag – Dr. Beverly Shankman.

“What do we have?” Beverly asked in such an eerily calm tone that Maria shuddered. The fact that seeing something like this and not being affected by it was unnerving to her. But then, she supposed Dr. Shankman saw things like this everyday… Maria didn’t.

The taller EMT, Travis, looked up at Beverly and frowned. “Elizabeth Doyle, 21, apparent overdose. Her sister Maria found her on the bathroom floor. We’re going to have to work fast on this one. She crashed twice on the ride over.” Travis passed Beverly Liz’s chart and she eyed it carefully. Maria knew she was suspicious of how little information it held, but she said nothing, merely looked up at Maria. “You’re the sister?”

Maria nodded feebly and starred down at Liz. God, she looked so… lifeless, so dead. Maria’s heart beat furiously against her chest as, for one tiny moment, she pictured Liz lying dead in a coffin… like Alex. “S-She didn’t mean to do it. I know her, I know that this isn’t what she wanted. She’s just been through a lot and…” She trailed off, unable to convince even herself.

“Do you know how much she took?” Beverly asked.

“I-I’m not sure,” Maria stuttered. “I had about a half a bottle left and I didn’t see the bottle when I found her. I was at work.”

Beverly nodded uncertainly and looked from Maria to Liz. She still wasn’t moving. Maria was afraid that if she touched her, she’d be cold. She couldn’t deal with that. “Let’s get her into Trauma 1,” Beverly ordered the growing crowd around them. “She’s going to need her stomach pumped and fast. Draw some blood too…”

“No!” Maria shouted, cutting Beverly off. She trembled and her eyes grew wide as she struggled to remember the cover story that she and Liz had concocted in case anything ever happened to them. God, if she could only deliver it and sound believable. “It’s against our religion to take blood from someone. It’s like the life-force of a person.”

Beverly stopped and stared at Maria. Her eyes roamed every inch of her, as if she were summing her up, analyzing her from head to toe. It made Maria uneasy. “Alright.”

They continued walking down the hall until they finally slammed through the doors of the trauma room. They quickly wheeled the gurney up beside another bed and prepared to transfer Liz’s limp form onto it.

“Alright, on three,” Eric commanded, putting his hand underneath Liz’s body while two other doctors did the same. “One, two, three.”

They all lifted together, placing Liz on the bed and Maria froze. When they moved Liz, she’d been turned to the side slightly and her hair had fallen loosely to the side – her barcode had shown. She prayed desperately that none of the doctors or nurses had seen it, but if she had to take a guess, she’d say that Dr. Beverly Shankman had.

Beverly was looking from Liz to Maria with some hint of fear and a hell of a lot of concern. She seemed to snap back into reality and looked at the other doctors around her. “Get her stomach pumped and an IV started.”

“But,” A younger male doctor interrupted.

Beverly shot the boy a serious, commanding look. “But nothing,” she growled. “I need to get a medical history from the patients sister. You are aware that that’s the procedure aren’t you?”

The doctor sighed and nodded in defeat. Beverly turned on her heel and began to walk towards Maria. Maria began to panic. She knew that she needed to run, but her legs weren’t really complying at the moment. It was like her body refused to let her abandon Liz – to leave her to the dogs.

Beverly stopped walking just inches from Maria and the two locked eyes in what seemed to be a silent challenge.

“We need to talk.”

Maria gulped. She hoped that the doctor couldn’t hear her heart pounding. “A-About what?”

Beverly rolled her eyes at Maria’s less than convincing question. “About the fact that your ‘sister’ is a transgenic, which probably means that you are too. I know you know that I saw her barcode. You looked like a deer caught in the headlights when her hair flipped back.”

“Please,” Maria whispered, pleading. “Please don’t turn us in.”

“Don’t worry,” Beverly whispered. She loosely gripped Maria’s arm and began to lead her away from Liz and down the hall. “If you’ll just trust me, even a little bit, then I may be able to help you and your sister.”

Maria stopped, hesitating for a moment. How could this woman, this doctor, help them? She’d learned long ago never to trust people who claimed they could help – Tapolski, Tess… Maria didn’t trust anyone other than Liz these days. The incident between Max and Liz flashed briefly into her mind and she flinched. No, forget Tess. That night with Liz and Max was why she didn’t trust people. Liz had trusted Max with her life and look what that had gotten her. He had… no, she wasn’t going to go there.

But at the moment, Maria was caught. She could either take a chance and trust the doctor, or she could risk someone else seeing Liz’s barcode and freaking out. Neither option really looked to appealing. She closed her eyes briefly and let out a long, heavy sigh. “Alright. But I know that I’m going to regret this.”
They continued walking down the hall and stopped before a heavy red metal door. Beverly looked quickly down the hall before she opened the door and ushered Maria inside.

“We’ll be able to talk in here.”

Maria looked, once again, uncertainly at Beverly before she moved completely into the room and closed the door behind her. Whatever she was going to have to do to save Liz from exposure – she would do it.


Max won’t stop watching me. I can feel him, feel his eyes burning into my back as I walk further away from his grasp. Jesus, I can’t even walk to the fucking bathroom without him getting all possessive.

I open the bathroom door and walk inside. I feel like I want to vomit. The stench in here is unbearable. I’ll deal with it though. I mean, I’ve been in worse places and I just can’t go back out there right now. I can’t deal with it.

I lean my back up against the wall and groan when I feel my legs tremble beneath me. I can’t believe I’m doing this – hiding from him. This isn’t me. This isn’t something that I would do. I’m a solider and I’m hiding like some, some coward.

“What are you doing in there, Liz?”

Oh god. My breath catches in my throat and I look nervously around. The door is locked, not that it makes much of a difference when dealing with the boy king.

“I’m just washing my face,” I say. The words leave my mouth in the coldest tone I’ve ever heard. I don’t think I even gave Deck this kind of freeze out. I reach for the faucet and turn the water on. “I’ll be out in just a second.” I glance in the mirror and frown. The bruise on my cheek has darkened since this morning. I really should get rid of that, but I won’t. I want him to see what he did to me. Hell, I should have stopped it from getting there in the first place. But let’s face facts shall we? Even though I can take Max physically, my powers are no match for his. He could squash me with a flick of his wrist. If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the last year, it’s never to piss off an alien, especially a royal one.

“Liz,” Max growls through the door

“I’m coming,” I grind out.

I have to get away from him. Soon.


Maria and Beverly sat across from each other in the most awkward silence that Maria had ever experienced. Maria coughed and Beverly shifted in her brown leather chair.

“So you guys are transgenics, right?”

Maria nearly laughed. She was about as far from a transgenic as you could get. She smirked and gave her answer. Might as well let her think that. “Yeah.”

Maria watched as Beverly hesitated. The doctor obviously wanted to ask her something, but was reluctant to do so. “C-Can I see your barcode?”

She scrunched her nose and sighed. Maria whirled around and lifted up her hair, revealing a barcode tattooed on the back of her neck. What Beverly hadn’t seen though, was Maria’s hand waving over her neck as she’d moved her hair. Maria didn’t like this, not one bit, but giving this woman visible evidence that she was a transgenic was better that telling her that she was an alien.

Beverly surveyed the barcode and nodded when Maria turned back around. “X5?”

Maria crossed her arms. She’d heard Liz say that before, X5. It had something to do with what batch of ‘super solider freaks’ she was a part of. The fact that Beverly knew that made her curious as to what else she knew. “That’s what they tell me.”

“How long have you two been in Seattle?”

Maria’s eyes narrowed. She was beginning to feel like Beverly had her under a microscope. “2 years. What’s with all the damn questions.” Hell, she thought, now I sound like Spaceboy.

“Look.” Beverly blinked heavily. She was obviously exhausted. “If you want my help then I’m going to need a few answers.”

“I never asked for your help,” Maria growled, staring sharply at the doctor.

Beverly clasped her hands and leaned forward on the desk. “While that may be true, you know you need my help, otherwise you wouldn’t have come into this office. Look, I know that you must be scared-“

“I’m not scared,” Maria snapped. Suddenly, everything that had happened over the last few years began to come out, to take it’s toll, and the tears that she’d been holding back finally sprang free. “It wasn’t supposed to be like this. W-We left to get away from all this shit. She can’t leave me here. I need her!”

“I-I really am sorry,” Beverly stammered. She grabbed a tissue from the desk and handed it to Maria, who took it gratefully. “but I can help you. I’m with Eyes Only.”

Maria’s tears suddenly stopped and she jerked her head up. Now that had caught her attention. She wondered if she was hearing things. Dr. Shankman couldn’t have said what Maria thought she just said.

“Can you repeat that please?”

“Ever since Manticore went down,” Beverly began to explain, “Eyes Only has put word out to all his informants that we’re to contact our contacts if we come into contact with a transgenic. We’re trying to help you guys, get everyone to safety across the border or wherever they want to go. That’s why I’ve been doing pro-bono work at a lot of clinics lately, hoping I could help people like you and your sister.”

Maria sat dumbfounded. Even though she hadn’t wanted to admit it, when she called 911 she expected her and Liz’s lives to be over, that they were sure to be captured. Yet although coming to Harbor Lights had at first seemed like a bad omen, it had really been a prayer answered. Liz may not have believed in God, but Maria sure as hell did now. Maybe she should go to church more often.

“I’m going to call my informant now, okay?”

Maria nodded. Maybe things wouldn’t be so horrible after all.


Logan groaned when the shrill, piercing ring of the phone hit his ears. He’d finally been making some progress on figuring out this stupid virus and the interruption was grating on his last nerve. He dropped his half gnawed up pencil and grabbed the phone.


“Logan. Hey,” a soft voice said. Logan snapped to attention as he realized who the voice belonged to. She wouldn’t be calling unless it was important.

“What’s up, Beverly?”

“Well,” she said hesitantly. “You’re the one I’m supposed to call if any transgenic related stuff goes down.”

He tapped his fingers against the desk anxiously. He already felt the need to page Max. “Are you at the Helman Clinic?”

“No, I’m up at Harbor Lights today. There are two girls here, came in about an hour and a half ago. One of them was pretty bad, overdosed on painkillers. Her sister found her and called 911 as a last resort.”

“Why do you say it was a last resort?” Logan asked, his curiosity getting the better of him.

“They have barcodes. Both of them.”

Logan began to frantically scribble down the information that Beverly had given him. “X5’s?”

“Yeah. But something doesn’t add up. The sister said they’d been in Seattle for two years now.”

Logan dropped the pencil and the urge to call Max grew stronger. “Listen,” he said, ignoring her statement before. “I’ll send a team in to get them in about an hour. Just meet up with them out front.”

“Thanks Logan.”

“I think I’m the one that should be thanking you,” Logan said just before he hung up. His head was spinning with new information. Who could the two girls be. If they had been in Seattle this long then they had to be part of the group that escaped that night in ’09. The question was, which ones were they. Not wasting another moment, Logan hit the speed-dial button that would ring Max’s cell.

“Go for Max,” her voice purred over into his ear.

“Hey Max,” He began. “Look, we’ve got a problem. You might want to get over here fast.”

“What’s up”

“I’ll fill you in when you get here. You better bring Alec, CeCe, and Biggs with you.”

“We’re already gone. See you in a few.”

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Re: Numb (DA, XO, UC, Adult) Ch. 4 7/7

Post by Traitor » Wed Jul 07, 2010 4:50 pm

Thanks to alisakuya, barbara87413, and VanilCoke for the feedback. I appreciate it guys and I hope you enjoy the update!

Chapter 4: Back to who I was

“This is fantastic, really. I mean, this is really my ideal way to spend my Friday night.” Alec pounded his head against the steel elevator walls to prove how bored he was. When Max had told him that they were needed, he had been cool with that, really he had. But by some cruel twist of fate, there had been a brownout when they’d boarded the elevator up to Logan’s apartment. So now he was stuck, with Max of all people. Yeah, this was fan-fucking-tastic.

“My bologna has a first name, it’s O-S-C-A-R. My bologna has a second name it’s M-A-Y-E-R…” Max glared at him as he began to sing the single most annoying song he could think of. He watched with amusement as her fists balled up at her sides and she clenched her jaw. Alec smirked and looked over at Biggs. Biggs smiled and they both continued to sing.

“Oh I love to eat it everyday-“

“Alec,” Max warned.

“And If you ask me why I’ll say…”

“Alec,” she hissed. Biggs and Alec merely glanced at each other and sang louder.

“Cause Oscar Mayer has a way with –“

“Spell it and die,” Max growled.

Alec smirked and leaned his head back against the wall. “You prefer another song, Maxie? Maybe the Spam or McDonalds theme perhaps?” This was just to much fun. They’d been in here less than half and hour and he already had the great 452 fuming. It was to easy.

Max glared, clenching her teeth in an effort to restrain the scream he knew she was dying to let out at him.

“What I want is for you to shut up. Think you could do that for me?”

He smirked again, just to piss her off. “Could, but won’t.”

“I’m going to kill you!”

He raised an eyebrow and wagged his finger at her. “Tisk, Tisk. Haven’t you already tried that a few times?”

Max snapped and with a cat-like hiss, she lunged at him. Luckily Biggs and CeCe were there and held her back. Max really did need to control that temper. He knew that the whole, ‘no nookie with Logan’ was the main cause of her aggression.

The lights above suddenly flickered and the soft whir of the elevator running caused a chorus of cheers to break out in the small group. Less than thirty seconds later, the where all piling out into the hall, Max out in front and Alec bringing up the rear. Huh, he thought with a smirk. As usual, I get stuck being the ass.

Max threw open Logan’s apartment door without even bothering to knock, not that she ever did anyway, and led the group to his desk around the corner. She didn’t even look to make sure that’s where he was, that was where he always was. In Alec’s perspective, Logan’s life consisted of two things: Brooding about his ‘relationship’ with Max and doing his super hero thing. Sad, if you asked Alec.

“Hey,” Max said, nodding to Logan in her lame attempt at a casual gesture.

“Hey yourself,” Logan said back.

The two would-be lovers locked eyes and remained silent for what seemed an eternity. Oh god, the puppy dog eyes. Anything but that. Alec rolled his eyes and resisted the urge to gag. He really needed to help Logan and Max find a cure for this virus cause all this was just pathetic.

“Not that this isn’t touching, “ Alec began sarcastically, breaking the pair from their trance. He crossed his arms and smirked again when he heard Biggs and CeCe try to contain their laughter. “But what was so important that I had to give up my night? I could have had a date.”

Biggs quirked and eyebrow in interest. “Who?”

“No one,” he replied. “The point is that I could have.”

“Riiight..”Logan drawled. Alec chose to ignore his attempt at sarcasm and watched as Logan turned and retrieved a file from his desk. He tossed it to Max, who promptly opened it and began to read.

“For those of us in the back of the line?” Biggs shouted in an overly loud voice, eliciting a growl from Max as she continued to read.

“I got a call about an hour ago from Dr. Beverly Shankman over at Harbor Lights. She's an Eyes Only informant, on the prowl for any transgenic related news,” Logan explained. “Beverly called to report a girl who came in about two hours ago, overdosed, and her sister who brought her in.”

“Transgenic?” CeCe asked, trying to confirm everyone’s thoughts.

Logan nodded before continuing. “They both have barcodes and they’re in desperate need of an extraction. Only, here’s the kicker.” Logan paused, looking thoughtfully at Max. “They’ve been in Seattle for two years.”

Alec looked to Max, whose face had suddenly gone slack and horribly pale. Escapees? What the hell was going on?

Without a word, Max turned on her heels and began to walk towards the door.

“Max!” Logan called out. “Where are you going?”

“Apparently,” She called over her shoulder, “I’m going to rescue some family.”


Liz opened her eyes and blinked slowly. She looked around, wincing as the stark white walls of the room reflected light back at her. Her heart pounded furiously against her chest and she struggled to breathe, tearing at the oxygen mask perched over her mouth and nose. Her first thought had been that she had been captured, that she had been taken to the White Room, but now she realized that she was lying in a hospital bed. At the moment, she wasn’t sure which of the two places was better. One was bound to lead to the other. It was only a matter of time before someone caught a glimpse of her barcode, if they hadn’t already.

Her stomach tied itself into knots as she struggled to remember the events of the last few hours, days, however long she had been out. She remembered telling Maria goodbye before her best friend left for work. She remembered and overwhelming cold and a thick, heavy darkness that had settled itself upon her. Liz cringed at the memory and clenched her eyes tightly shut. She couldn’t deal with this now. She was to weak and in far to much pain.

She yawned against her will and nuzzled her head into the pillow behind her. Her fingers scratched absently at her hand and she winced when her nails caught the edge of the IV. Letting go, she relaxed and fell into a steady breathing rhythm. She was still so tired…


Their names are Jeff and Nancy Parker.

My name is no longer X5-766 or even Eva. I got rid of those, a piece of my past that I would rather forget. Now I’m Liz Parker and the people sitting in the car with me are my parents.

My eyes settle on the Parkers. Jeff is behind the wheel driving us home and humming along with the radio and Nancy is asleep in the passenger seat, her head resting against the window. I can’t help the smile that breaks out on my face when I look at them, my parents. Wow, that sounds really weird. My. Parents. I wonder if any of the others have found a home yet, if they’ve been as lucky as I have.

It’s been nearly six months since the escape from Manticore, since Ben found me lying half-dead in the snow. I’m still not entirely sure what happened. All I know it that my brother saved me. I remember him pulling me up into the safety of his arms. I remember his breath against my ear, whispering for me to hold on. After that, all I remember is darkness. When I came to two days later, we had managed to make it to some little cave out near the woods. Oh yeah, and where a rather nasty bullet wound should have been, a faint shimmering handprint lay instead. When I asked Ben, well begged is more like it, to tell me what happened and why the hell I was glowing, all he would do was break out into this goofy grin and tell me that The Blue Lady was much prettier than we had imagined. She’d heard my cries, he would tell me, and she’d came to us and saved me.

It’s strange. Ever since I woke up that day I’ve felt different somehow, stronger, smarter, faster.

After about a week of letting me rest, which I totally didn’t need, we set out, just Ben and me against the world. We wandered around for nearly a month, only stopping occasionally to rest and take what we needed. Eventually though, Ben said he had to leave me, that Zack had ordered us to split up and we had to obey. He refused to leave me alone though, so he dropped me off at an orphanage in Las Cruces, New Mexico. He promised to find me later though. And I know Ben, he always keeps his promises.

I didn’t like it at St. Peters. The kids all cried to much and the nuns scared the shit out of me. I sometimes thought about handing my ass back to Manticore with a ‘Return to Sender’ stamp – but that whole being killed on the spot option didn’t look to appealing, so I stayed where I was. I raised hell and stayed depress, missing my family, and then they finally came. Sister Margaret, the scary witch in charge, tried to talk them out of taking me. She told them that I was a problem child. That I couldn’t even remember my own name.. They didn’t care though. They just smiled, signed the papers, and then I was theirs. 10 year old Elizabeth Ann Parker. I had a real name and I had parents. Life was finally beginning to look up.

Nancy, my mom, sighs softly in her sleep, breaking me out of my sappy moment. I watch with fascination as Jeff reaches out and pulls her gently towards him, letting her rest on his arm. They both look so sweet. I think I could get used to this life – no training, no killing, just growing up with two parents who have made it clear that they adore me.

Jeff looks back at me and smiles brightly. His smile is warm. It makes me feel, I don’t know, safe. Like if I stay near him then nothing can touch me. Like if I should fall, he’d be right there to catch me.

“Look up ahead, Lizzie girl.”

He jerks his head towards the front window, at the scenery at lies ahead of us. I crane my neck up to see what’s gotten him so excited.

A large sign with an enormous green alien sits off to the side of the road about a mile ahead of us. It’s completely ugly and horrible and I struggle not to laugh. One the center of the sign, the aliens hand points to letters in bold black script. ‘Welcome to Roswell.’

“This is it, Lizzie,” Jeff sighs warmly as he looks out at the open road. “Welcome home.”

Home. I try my hardest to suppress a smile, but I fail miserably. I’m smiling, smiling so big it hurts. No more Manticore. This is home now. Welcome, Liz Parker, to your new normal life. I have defiantly, without a doubt, deserved it.


They’d made it to their destination in what had to be record time.

Heavy footsteps sounded across the pavement as a scowling Max hopped off of her bike and began to walk towards the hospital’s entrance. She hissed in anger when a hand clamped around her arm and she spun around to face Alec. Her eyes flared up in anger but Alec just stared her down, smirking his usual smirk.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

“Where the fuck do you think I’m going? She growled. Max jerked, attempting to free herself from Alec’s grasp, but he held her firmly.

“Oh no you’re not,” he said, rolling his eyes. “You are staying out here while Biggs, CeCe, and I go and get the girls. Remember that little incident that you were involved in here? I’m sure that those doctors and the CDC guys would love to get their hands on you again, Linda. So unless you plan on being captured, again, you’re not going anywhere.”

Biggs and CeCe, who had been standing a few feet back, smirked at the look at pure fury then defeat that crossed Max’s face. Alec was right, of course, not that any of them would admit it aloud. Max just couldn’t afford to go prancing in there so soon after her prior incident.

“Fine,” she spat, voice dripping with obvious disdain. She jerked again, this time managing to free her arm from Alec’s hold. “But if anything happens to them, make no mistakes. I will crush you.”

“Do you know who they are, Max?” CeCe asked hesitantly.

“No. That’s what I’m hoping to find out.” Her head snapped back around and she stared at the three of them in turn. “Now go. White and his goons will probably show up soon looking to capture them if we don’t hurry.”

Alec’s eyes narrowed. He was worried seeing Max like this, as were Biggs and CeCe.


“Just go Alec. Please,” Max sighed, crossing her arms across his chest. “I’ll meet you around the back exit.”

Alec nodded, readied himself, and motioned for Biggs and CeCe to follow. They exchanged a quick glance and followed him, moving stealthy toward the front door. Leaving Max behind to ponder exactly which of her siblings she would be meeting at the door.


Maria shivered as a strong blast of wind his her in the face. Beverly stood beside her, rocking back and forth on her heels anxiously. They had been standing outside, waiting on Liz’s salvation, for over an hour now. Both of them were worried because, as of yet, no one had showed and Liz was still alone. Beverly suddenly sighed in relief, catching Maria\s attention, and she pointed to three people running across the parking lot.

“That’ll be them.”

“How can you be sure?” Maria asked uncertainly.

“Because no one else looks that determined,” Beverly explained. “They have a purpose.”

Maria sighed, leaning back further against the wall in a futile attempt to shelter herself from the wind. She watched as the three people moved towards them at what seemed to be an agonizingly slow pace. For Maria, they couldn’t get there fast enough. She was petrified. Not for herself, but for Liz.

Biggs, CeCe, and Alec walked up to Maria and Beverly. Maria studied each of them in turn while they did the same to her. Alec nodded to her then turned his attention to Beverly.

“She one?”

Beverly nodded. “Come on. The sooner we get Elizabe..”

“Liz,” Maria corrected.

Beverly smiled. “Liz,” she amended, “out of here, the better.”

Biggs looked at Maria and smirked. “Can you take care of yourself? Cover the rear?”

“Yeah,” Maria said, doing her best to sound convincing, watching her feet as they entered the hospitals double doors and began their decent down the hall. “I’m good. I’ve got us covered.”

They arrived at the door before Maria ever realized that she’d walked five steps. She’d been to lost in her own thoughts to notice.

“This is it,” Beverly said. She looked over her shoulder to make sure that the coast was clear and then pushed open the door, stepping aside and letting everyone else enter before her. All eyes went to Liz lying limply in the hospital bed. Alec, CeCe, and Biggs looked at each other and gaped.

“Is it just me or does she remind you of a cranky, ill tempered, someone that we left outside?” CeCe whispered.

Alec watched Liz then glanced up at Maria. “It’s not just you, Ce.”


All five of the rooms conscious occupants whirled around to see a burly security guard standing in the doorway.

“Let’s move,” Alec hissed, staring down the security guard until he retreated. Surly he’d be back soon…and with a few more friends.

Alec moved over to Liz and swiftly unhooked her from the machinery that she’d been hooked up to. As gently as possible, he pulled Liz into his arms, marveling at how light she was, and he briefly caught a glimpse of her barcode.

For only a moment, Liz’s eyes fluttered open and Hazel eyes locked with Brown. Alec froze.

“Ben?” she murmured before slipping back into unconsciousness.

His mind reeled. Had she just called him…

“Stop right there!” a security guard shouted, his gun, along with ten others, raised at Alec. “Put the girl down and back away.”

Alec chose to ignore the warning and began to walk toward the blocked doorway. The security guard in front jumped and an antsy trigger finger caught on the gun, releasing a loud pop.

Maria screamed and raised her hand in defense. Please God! She thought, pouring all her strength into harnessing her powers. It worked, and in a an instant, a large green force-field deflected the bullet away from Liz and back at the wall. She glanced at the rooms occupants who stared at her in shock. “I can’t hold this. We have to go. Now.”

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Re: Numb (DA, XO, UC, Adult) Ch. 5

Post by Traitor » Tue Jul 27, 2010 5:44 pm

Big thanks to barbara87413, behrstars, VanilCoke, Synera, and roswellian love for all the feedback! I'm really glad you guys are enjoying it. And to the lurkers, thanks for reading.

Also, this is the last chapter that was previously posted on the boards, so the next chapter will be the first new one in over 5 years. *gulp* I'm working on it hard, guys, and I'll try not to dissapoint. :wink:

Chapter 5: Somebody Save Me.

Maria glanced back at them again as she felt the energy beginning to drain from the rest of her body to pool at her fingertips. She hadn’t been holding this thing up even a minute and she already felt like she was going to give out. Her eyes locked with Alec’s and she held his gaze momentarily.

“Please go,” she begged. “Just get her out of here.”

There was so much desperation in her eyes as she spoke to him. Alec glanced down at Liz and pushed away the thoughts of another person who had looked at him like that before. He wouldn’t, couldn’t, and refused to think about that right now. He looked back up at Maria, a girl he knew absolutely nothing about and who he was pretty certain was defiantly something other than transgenic. Right now, exactly what she was didn’t matter though because she was the only thing keeping all of them safe from the rather large amount of gunfire coming from the guards.

Alec nodded. “Let’s move out,” he ordered, glancing back to Biggs and CeCe before eyeing the only human in the room. Beverly was shaking, holding onto her lab coat with an iron grip. “You’re going to have to come with us, you know.”

“Yeah. Well seeing as how going to prison is my other option, I’d say that coming with you guys is a pretty big given,” she said sarcastically, rolling her eyes and letting a dry chuckle slip past her lips.

Maria ignored Beverly, instead settling her eyes upon Liz. She looked so broken, and Maria knew that the only way Liz was even going to have a chance at a future was if a sacrifice was made. Someone had to stay behind and cause a distraction, draw the fire from the mounting number of guards on the other side of her shield.

She looked away as Alec crawled out the window, CeCe sliding out behind him after she handed Liz through. Biggs ushered Beverly through but he didn’t follow. He started at Maria, the way her shoulders stiffened, the way her cheeks were flushing at the extreme effort she was putting out. He knew what she was going to do. He would have done it himself had CeCe or Alec been in danger.

“You aren’t transgenic, are you?”

She shook her head and chuckled bitterly. The truth didn’t matter when you were about to die. She remained strong, holding back the tears. It’s funny, she never thought she’d die the same way as…

“Are you coming?” he asked hesitantly, already knowing her answer but needing to ask the question all the same.

She shook her head again. “Someone has to stay behind. This time it’s my turn.” Her turn, her turn to die. She wished she could have told Liz goodbye.

Biggs nodded and began to climb out the window, but something inside of him wouldn’t allow it. He couldn’t leave her behind. Maybe because he needed answers as to what was going on, maybe it was something else, all he knew was that he couldn’t do it.

He walked over to Maria, grabbing her free hand in his own, and threaded their fingers together. She looked at him hesitantly, confused and shocked by the sudden contact.

“Start backing up,” he said sternly, switching to solider mode. “Keep that thing up and when I tell you to, drop it.”

Maria nodded and began to step back, arm still outstretched, until her back hit the wall. Biggs positioned himself on the window sill, still holding tightly to Maria’s hand..


Maria swallowed thickly and dropped her arm, allowing the shield to drop with it. An assault of gunfire broke out but with one quick jerk from Biggs, they were out the window and hitting the pavement underneath. They scrambled up quickly and began to run full force around to the back of Harbor Lights. Maria felt herself growing weaker by the moment and she moaned as her legs gave out from underneath her. She fell, only to be yanked up swiftly into Biggs’s arms. He briefly wondered why all the transgenic men were carrying around unconscious women today but his humor faded as he reached the corner, greeted by a frowning Max.

Max glanced and Maria then nodded her head towards the free bike behind her.

“Let’s blaze before White shows.”
Max and Alec were the first ones to barge through Logan’s front door. One glance up and Logan had practically bolted from his computer over to them. He surveyed Liz, laying unconscious in Alec’s arms, and was briefly taken aback by the resemblance that she and Max shared. He wondered if behind her closed lids the same dark chocolate brown eyes as Max’s were there.

“Where can I put her?” Alec asked, swallowing thickly.

Logan pointed down the hallway. “First door on your left is the guest bedroom. Put her there.”

Alec nodded in thanks and walked swiftly down the hallway, only once looking down at Liz to wonder what in the hell they’d gotten themselves mixed up in.

“So who is she?” Logan asked, glancing over at Max who stared blankly at the wall, her eyes glazed over in a mask of uncertainty.

“Dunno,” she answered dryly. “What with that little incident of mine at the hospital Alec wouldn’t let me go in. Figured it’d stir up trouble. So I got stuck being the lookout. All I know is that they were under some heavy fire for about 2 minutes before they came out. They had to bring your doctor friend with them to.”

Logan caught a glimpse of the door opening swiftly behind them as Biggs, CeCe, Beverly, and a now conscious Maria walked in. Max jerked uncharacteristically as the door clammed behind them and she whirled around, glaring coldly at Maria, then looked to Biggs and CeCe.

“Get them settled in. I’m gonna have some questions in a few minutes.” She ordered. The other two transgenics nodded, already used to being ordered around by Max. “I need to talk to Alec first though.”

He’d sat her down on the bed as gently as possible before pulling up an arm chair from the corner to sit beside her. It irritated him that he didn’t know who she was, and it irritated him even further that she thought he was is serial killer psycho twin, Ben.

Her eyes fluttered open briefly and she smiled a ghost of a smile.

Her dry, cracked lips parted.

“Ben,” she whispered hoarsely. “I-I’m sorry.”

Her eyes fell shut again and Alec started at her in shock.

A heavy sigh sounded behind him and he glanced back to see Max standing there, eyes wide, with her arms hugged tightly around herself.

“Did she just…” Max paused as she knelt down beside the bed. Her eyes roamed, her heart raced, and her mind reeled. She prayed silently for an instant answer to everything but nothing came. “She called you Ben.”

Alec nodded dumbly. “She did it at the hospital too. Then I picked her up, she said it. It’s getting kind of annoying to be quite honest.”

Max frowned and Alec’s eyes fell to her. He hadn’t seen her like this since they found Zack that day in the alley. She looked broken, like a piece of herself was missing. Her eyes brimmed with tears that she refused to shed. He knew she was trying to be strong, but the damn had to break sometime. Even he knew that.

“I don’t know who she is,” Max whispered hoarsely. “She’s a part of my family and I don’t have a clue.”

“Well,” Alec began, “Didn’t happen to grow up with any junkie sisters did ya?”

Max glared daggers at him and he silenced. She’d already gone through the list of known escapees in her head, as had Alec, and Liz didn’t seem to fit anywhere on that list. This girl….it wasn’t possible that she’d escaped with them…..was it?

“Well she has to fit somewhere, Max,” Alec said, as if reading her mind. “It’s not like she just magically appeared. She knows about, “ he stumbled over the next name, but continued, “Ben after all.”

Alec blew out a puff of air and sighed. He rubbed his eyes tiredly and something hit him that should have been obvious to even the slowest of people.

“Her barcode.”

“What?” Max asked

“Look at her barcode,” Alec elaborated. “Read her designation.”

Max’s eyes light up and she mentally slapped herself for not thinking of that sooner. She reached out, gently rolling Liz over and Alec pulled back her hair to get a clear view of what they were looking for.

Max’s eyes widened and she stumbled back on her knees. The color drained from her face and she shook her head fiercely from side to side.

“No,” Max whispered hoarsely. “No, No, No, No, No.”

Alec’s brow furrowed in confusion. “Max?”

Max looked at him, eyes swimming with uncertainty. “She’s supposed to be dead! I saw her die! I-I saw…”

“Max?” Alec asked. “Who is she?”

Max looked at Liz, a person she knew nothing about, and thought of a girl who she’d once regarded as a sister so many years ago. The memories bombarded her. Thoughts of tiny fingers locking with her own, whispered promises that had been broken days after they were made, and a gunshot ringing out loudly as a sister became the first to fall.

She’d seen her fall. She’d seen Lydecker shoot her, but she’d never even considered the possibility that her sister had survived the bullet. Max swallowed back the guilt like bile. And she hadn’t even gone back to save her. She hadn’t even checked. She hadn’t even tried.

The words slipped past her lips, barely a whisper, laced with more guilt and confusion than she’d ever felt. “She’s Eva.”

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Numb (DA, XO, UC, Adult) Ch. 6 9/9/10

Post by Traitor » Thu Sep 09, 2010 4:39 pm

Hey guys! Sorry for the wait, I know it's been awhile, but I just started my last semester or school and I've been really busy.

Loads of thanks for all the feedback and bumps, I love you guys and I love reading what you have to say, so keep it coming!

Now, this is the first part of this that I've written in 5 years, so if it doesn't flow properly I apologize. I'm trying, I really am!

Hope you enjoy!


Chapter 6: Before I wake…

Maria shifted uncomfortably on the couch, trying to pretend that four pairs of eyes had not settled on her, unblinking. They hadn’t taken their eyes off of her since they had arrived back at Logan’s apartment. Biggs and CeCe were analyzing her, she had no doubt about that, Maria could pratically see the wheels spinning in there heads. They wanted to know what she was, who she was, but no one in the room seemed to want to be the first to ask that question.

CeCe squinted at Maria, taking in every detail, every line on her face, every scar that was visible. This girl had saved their asses at Harbor Lights today, how, they still weren’t sure, but there could be no denying what she had done.

Biggs, Alec, CeCe, Liz….they all owed Maria their lives.

But the question remained…..what was she? Just because Maria had saved them didn’t mean that they were simply going to forget what she had done back there. They had questions for her, lots of them, Was she mearly a Manticore project or was she something much more, something unknown?

Maria let out a sigh, blowing a stray piece of hair from her face and crossed her arms defiantly. She was worried about Liz, about what was going on in the other room. Nothing else mattered to her right now She didn’t have time to sit here and be interrogated. Hell she wasn’t even being interrogated….she was just being stared at. It was unnerving.

“Can I just go check on Liz now? Please?” she asked, her eyes pleading with Logan. Logan looked to CeCe and Biggs for conformation, but Biggs shook his head, effectively dismissing Marias request.

Biggs shifted on Logans couch, standing up tall and proud to stare at Maria. Her eyes gleamed at him, showing an unwavering confidence he was not sure even Max could match.

“What are you?” he asked suspiciously.

Maria rolled her eyes and scoffed. “Oh yeah, that’s the way to woo a girl. ‘What are you?’ I’m so glad I turned to women.” She gave a wink to CeCe who shifted uncomfortable in her seat. “And I’m not a what, by the way. I’m a person.”

“Not a normal one,” Logan interjected.

Maria cast a sideways glare at Logan. She wasn’t sure she liked him yet.

“I,” Maria began, “never claimed to be normal, did I?”

Biggs sighed in annoyance. He was getting tired of the games she was playing. He wanted answers and he wanted them now.

“So you aren’t a transgenic?” he asked, eyes narrowed

Maria shook her head. “Nope.”

“Are you a manticore side project?” CeCe asked.

Maria wanted to laugh. She would have thought that a super solider could smell the anomaly in her blood. It smelled metallic and tangy, that was how Liz had always described the changed human scent. But Liz had always been smarter the the average bear, hadn’t she?

“Nope.” Maria answered once again. “Strike two for the transgenic. You know, I’d tell you, but you aren’t asking the right questions.”

Logan leaned forward, his attention fully peaked.

“And what is the right question?” he asked.

Maria laughed to herself and turned her attention to the grey sky hovering outside of Logans apartment window. It reminded her of Liz. Dark, clouded, ready to burst.

She looked back to Logan sadly and smiled. “You shouldn’t be asking who I am. You should be asking who Liz is…..and how you’te friends in there are going to react when they find out.”


Alec watched Max anxiously, waiting for some clue as to who she was talking about. One eyebrow cocked up in question and he folded his arms. This was just like Max, give him half an answer and them leave him hanging. He really loathed that about her.

“Aaaannnnd,” he asked, snapping his fingers at Max, who still refused to look at him. “Who the fuck is Eva. And why are you so upset at her being alive?”

Max clutched her sisters hand tightly. Her eyes brimmed with tears that she refused to let fall. Not now, not when Alec was standing there to mock the pain that wanted to burst free from inside.

“Eva,” Max said, managing to ebb the pain in her voice. “Was the first of us to fall in the beginning.”

Her thoughts turned dark then, revisiting that night so many years ago. Eva had fallen, fallen to save them all. She had been the smallest of their unit, but she had also been the bravest. She had always challenged Zach, always made her voice heard, and that night, she had stood up to Lydecker and was payed back with a bullet to the heart.

She’d fallen lifelessly to the floor. No breath, no noise, just a warm pool of blood spreading out underneath her. Eva was dead. Max had been sure of that.

Max’s eyes looked to the face of her sister, a face that looked so much like her own, and her walls broke. Why hadn’t she made sure? Why hadn’t she taken that extra second to check for a pulse?

Something dark and nasty inside of her hissed back, Because you were to worried about saving your own ass.

Alec shifted uncomfortable behind her and sighed. Part of him wanted to laugh at her sudden display of emotion, but another part of him felt sorry for her, He reached out, patting her shoulder with a heavy thud. He grimaced at the contact.

“It’s ok? I mean, I’m not really sure what the hell I’m supposed to say here, Maxie.” He scratched his head. “I’m very confused right now.”

Max was about to turn around and yell at him, scream, hit him, do anything she could to release the pain that she felt, but a tiny squeeze of her hand made her jump instead, Her eyes darted up, coming immediately into contact with dark chocolate orbs that mirrored her own,

Her sister was awake.

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Re: Numb (DA, XO, UC, Adult) chapter 7

Post by Traitor » Mon Oct 18, 2010 6:40 pm

Hey guys!

Sorry to leave you all so long without an update, but I'm back now and just wanted to thank you all for your support. My husband is fine, at least in the sense that it isn't anything that is going to kill him, and I appreciate the thoughts guys!

I wish i had time to leave individual feedback, but I am running late for class so I'll just say THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart for all the feedback. I love you all and you'll never know how much I appreciate it!

Onto the show!

Chapter 7: Never Been Easy

Liz groaned, forcing herself to take in a deep breath, the oxygen burning her lungs. Sound was muffled, like she had cotton stuffed in her ears, and she had never had so much trouble opening her eyes.

It felt like someone had punched her in the gut and for a moment, she couldn’t make sense of what was going on, of why she felt like this, but then she remembered.

Cold creeping blackness.

No light.

The hard pills going down her throat as she tried to swallow.

Memories breaking free that she had tried so hard to seal away behind a stone wall in her mind.

Something warm was in her hand, fingers laced with her own, and she squeezed them as tightly as she could. It had to be Maria. She had to be there and Liz had to let her know that she was ok. She wanted to smile, thinking of the friend that always stood by her, even though she knew Maria would probably kill her for this, but she couldn’t make her lips move.

Her eyes stung as the first bit of light managed to crack through her lids and she blinked severly times, trying to make the blurry images around her focus.

Liz saw a room with high cealings, full of warmth and color, difinatly not a hospital. And as she moved her eyes around, she caught movement, shapes, people.

Long, dark hair spilled over shoulders. Tan limbs. Taught muscles. A flash of pain across warm brown eyes that made her heart retch.

Familiar, warmth and love, regret.

She knew those eyes. Knew that soul that lived in this unfamiliar body and even though Liz had difficulty grasping what was going on around her, there was no doubt in her mind who this girl was that clung tightly to her hand.


X5- 452

Her sister.

She flinced under Max’s gaze, feeling suddenly dizzy, and trying desperately to hold onto consciousness. She couldn’t lose this, couldn’t lose her.

Maybe she had died.

Maybe this was her own personal hell.

She wanted to laugh at the irony of it. How fitting that she should end up being merciasly tormented by the sister who had left her. Had forgotten her.

Liz shrugged off the dizziness, letting Max come into focus more clearly and she noticed another person behind her sister, turning away towards the door behind him. Sandy blonde hair and a lean body. She thought of Ben and focused on him as he walked out of the door, shutting it quickly and quietly behind him.

Liz’s eyes shot back to the girl in front of her, and she instantly hardened, stealing herself back behind her iron walls.

Yes, this was her sister.

Yes, she had loved her once.

But that had been a lifetime ago. Before she had been abandoned.

I’ll always find you, she heard the echo of Max’s promise whisper across her mind.


She hadn’t even tried.

“That’s not my name.”

Her throat burned like fire as the words pushed themselves up and out of her mouth. She hated being called that. Hated to remember who she had been, who she was.

Max’s eyes were filled with tears that she refused to shed, filled with hurt and regret.

“I know it’s you. I’d know you anywhere.” Max sighed, her voice cracking as she attempted to hold back a sob.

Liz turned her head, every movement filled with agony, and refused to look at Max, refused to acknowledge her.

She knew then she was alive. Knew that even the devil couldn’t be so cruel as to do this to her.

She suddenly longed for the pills again, for the numbness, for death.

Why hadn’t the Blue Lady let her die?

Why did she have to be brought back here? Back to life? Back to her?

But she had never been able to do anything right.

She couldn’t even die properly.
Maria was still staring at Logan with narrowed eyes when Alec ran out from around the corner.

He didn’t look at her, only at the doctor who sat across from her. He pointed, beckoning with his finger. “You need to come in here now.”

Maria froze and began to panic. “Is it Liz? Oh my god, is she dead? Is she alright?” she shrieked, the pitch of her voice getting higher with each word.

Alec flinched at the shrillness of her voice. He put his hands up as Maria bolted up, about to rush him. “Woah, chill pixie stick. She’s not dead.”

“Then why do you need the doctor, huh?” Maria asked, trying to brush past him, but being stopped by his hard body stepping in front of her. “What’s wrong?!” she screamed, beating her fists against his chest.

Normally Alec would have laughed at her, but he figured this wasn’t the best time for his sarcastic humor.

“She’s awake.” he said, trying his best to be soothing. “And we know who she is.”

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Re: Numb (DA, XO, UC, Adult) Chapter 8, 6/27/11

Post by Traitor » Mon Jun 27, 2011 2:12 pm

So first I would like to apologize for the MAJOR delay in this story. I had alot of rl stuff going on and unfortunatly, when it came to this story, my muse decided to abandon me. Fortunatly it's back now, but this part still doesnt flow quite right to me. I worked on it majorly but this was the best I could get it.

Thank you all so so much for sticking with me. Thanks to all of you for commenting and bumping this story. I love you all for it and as always, I hope you enjoy!


8. Keep Pressing

Max’s hands shook as she shut the door behind her softly. Dr. Shankman and Maria were in there, giving Liz a through exam.

Liz. That name didn’t sound right, didn’t feel right when she let the name roil off of her tongue. Seeing her made it hard to breathe, made moving and being and existing that much harder. Everything around her seemed slowed down, weighted. Eva, because that was exactly who she was, made Max’s world turn on its axis.

Alec had rounded the corner, watching her, taking in the situation with a keen observant eye. She hadn’t noticed him and she flinched ever so slightly when he leaned against the wall beside her.

Her eyes caught him off guard.

Max, miss I’m going to kick your ass, was crying. He didn’t know if she even realized she was doing it. Probably not or she would have wiped them away before he had noticed.

The always present smirk of his disappeared in a flash. He wasn’t going to bait her….and Max thanked god for that,

It unnerved Alec to see her like this. This was not the Max he had come to know and, reluctantly, love. He watched the bleak hollowness in her eyes and couldn’t help but compare her to the girl lying broken in the other room.

Their eyes mirrored each other.

Broken down….Tired.

“Eva, huh?” His eyes never left her. He was trying to gage her reaction, get more out of her. Alec crossed his arms against his chest and leaned his head against the wall. “An ‘09er?”

She nodded bleakly.

“You’ve never mentioned her.”

Max’s head snapped towards him and her eyes darkened. Anger, resent, self hatred…it rolled off of her in waves and he couldn’t help but unconsciously take a step back. “Thought she was dead…..I saw her. She couldn’t have made it…..but,”

Max’s eyes went absent again and she looked at the closed door beside her, wanting to run in, wanting to shake Liz until she had an answer.

“Here she is through,” He scoffed, letting his old self slip back in without a thought. “And I gotta say, she’s a fucked up girl, Maxie….”

As soon as the words left his mouth he regretted it. Max was on him faster than he’d ever seen her move.

Alec’s head slammed against the door….hard.

He choked back the urge to wince. Yeah, he had deserved that, but he wasn’t about to let her know that.

“I left her, you jackass!” Her words were sharp, biting, and more directed towards herself than at him. “Lydecker shot her in the fucking heart and what did I do?” She pushed her forearm tighter, digging into his throat. He let her. “I fucking ran away.”

She threw him back against the wall in release and slid down to the floor, hands over her head. “He shot her in the heart.”

Memories of her own wound raced through her mind….. Had they recaptured her? Was that how she had lived? Had they given Eva a heart like they’d done with her?


She stood up, steeling herself off, turning her normal self back on. Breakdown time was over, now it was time for answers. “I need to talk to Logan.” She didn’t look at him, just turned and stalked off towards her pseudo lovers library.

Alec huffed and rubbed his brow. “I try and be understanding and I get slammed against a wall.. Just great.” He turned, staring at Liz’s door a moment longer before heading back towards the living room. “These women are all insane…”


“So she’s ok, right?” Maria questioned, pacing the floor and chewing her fingernails down to the nub. Liz had always cringed when she did that. “I mean, like, on a scale of one to ten, how ok is she? Cause I’m kinda wigging out here.”

Even in the darkest of moments, Maria managed to make Liz crack a smile. That was her Maria. Her wonderful, crazy, peppy best friend that would never stop talking. Liz wanted to listen to her forever right now, to drink in the wonderful comfort of her voice.

Dr. Shankman sighed, pulling Liz from her thoughts and she looked between the two of them. She was asking Liz, silently, for permission to speak honestly. Liz nodded her approval.

“Honestly, “ the doctor said with a sigh, “She’s perfect.”

“Oh thank god!” Maria breathed, rushing forward and grabbing Liz into a hug. Darkness slipped from Liz’s thoughts momentarily and she giggled at her friends excitement.

“But….” Beverly continued. Liz sighed. So much for her moment of happiness. “that’s physically. Mentally, I’m worried.”

“I’m fine,” Liz ground out. She sat up in the bed, shaking away the rest of the haze from her mind and smiled sarcastically. “See? Fine.”

“Liz, You tried to kill yourself.”

Liz’s eyes darkened. Her mind screamed at her. “Yeah, but I didn’t. So we are all peaches around here, really.”


Liz raised her hand, She didn’t want to hear this now, especially when it came from a stranger, especially when her long lost sister was in the same house. “You can go now, doc.”

Liz waved her hand, forcing a little power to nudge the good doctor, who looked extremely startled.

“Al…Alright, but Logan knows how to contact me if you need me,”

She wavered for a moment, unsure is she should actually leave or not, but eventually, she shook her head and left without another word.

Once the door shut, Liz looked at Maria with all seriousness.

“I’m sorry, Ria. I love you and I’m sorry….” She paused, squeezing Maria’s hand fiercely. “But we need to get out of here fast. I can’t stay here.”


“Liz, do you really think we need to be leaving like this?” Maria hissed, trying to remain quiet. “I mean, they did save you.”

Liz ducked around a corner, pulling Maria behind her. Her wonderful, amazing best friend had managed to keep the others at bay all day, telling them Liz needed to rest and giving her some peace, although Maria had told her that it had not been easy to keep Maxie out.

But now it was night, and now was her chance.

She looked warily around, noticing nothing but empty couches and chairs before her.

Liz looked at Maria and nodded her head. They needed to move, and fast. It was times like this that she was grateful for her two years of running. Maria would never have been so stealthy without all that practice. You learn how to sneak about when you have bullets constantly barraging you.

They made it to the elevator and Liz let out a sigh of relief at the sight of it. A few more feet and they were free, they were out of this fucking nightmare full of ghosts that should have stayed buried.

But Liz had no one to blame for this but herself. If she hadn’t been so stupid, she never would have been here… never would have had to know that Maxie was alive and breathing and in the same city.

God had a twisted sense of humor.

She gripped Maria’s hand tightly urging her forward and they made it to the elevator without any noise alerting them.

A suddenly very strong warm chest collided against her and she lurched back with a hiss, the feline in her taking control.

Why, of all of them to try and stop her did it have to be him?

His eyes sparkled with warmth, humor… light, something that Ben didn’t have the last time she saw him. No, this wasn’t Ben, but he made her heart ache for him none the less.

He quirked an eyebrow and stared down at her, making her silently curse his height advantage. “Going somewhere?”

Maria was shaking behind her, Unsure of what to do. Liz continued to stare at him but cocked her head to the side. “Maria, get on the elevator. I’ll be right behind you.”:

“Liz, no.”

She turned around, eyes narrowed, commanding. But a small smile crossed her lips to reassure the blonde. “Go. I’m right behind you.”

Maria nodded and reluctantly moved forward, Liz never taking her eyes off of Alec.

“Where are you going?” he asked when Maria was safely tucked behind the elevator doors. His eyes were soft as they looked at her, not hard or judging….. Just….there.

“I can’t stay here.” she whispered.

“Why not?” He crossed his arms and loomed over her. “We need answers, Max needs answers.”

Liz chuckled bitterly. “Yeah, well, I’m sorry. I just can’t help her with that right now.”

She stared at him, and suddenly the urge that had been growing inside of her pushed to hard. She reached a hand out and touched his face gingerly. Stroking his cheek with the pads of her fingers. Alec didn’t move, didn’t react, just let her feel.

“You look so much like him…”

He wanted to speak, to say something, but his face grew hot and suddenly his world started to grow dim.

He knew she’d be gone when he awoke.

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Re: Numb (DA, XO, UC, Adult) Chp 9 , 7/19/11

Post by Traitor » Tue Jul 19, 2011 9:55 pm

barbara87413: Glad you enjoyed the update!

pandas2001: lol. I'm glad my getting out a new chapter, finally!, made you happy! Thanks for the feedback!

VanilCoke: Thanks for reading and I'm happy you like it!

jake17: That made my freaking day! lol. I'm so happy you enjoy the story and thank you immensly! That means alot coming from you. I LOVE all your stories!

WHAT? What is this? Me, posting another update in less than a month? :shock: It's a miracle! lol. Thanks to you all. I'm trying to pull myself out of a writing slump and all you're feedback has helped immensly. Thank you all for reading and as always, I hope you enjoy!

(*Note: As always flashbacks are in Liz POV and in italics. There is no rhyme or reason to their order. Its sporadic within the timeline.)


Chapter 9. Now you see me…

I can’t take this anymore. I can’t take sitting her in silence everyday, never opening my mouth, never saying one word to contradict him. It is my job, I suppose, to play the dutiful wife, to be stoic and bear my burden silently. I can’t help but wonder why I ever even married him, what I ever loved about him. The Max Evans that wooed and loved me so many years ago no longer exists.

I’m tired of this life. I’m tired of pretending to be weak for the greater good. I’m tired of Max Evans… no, make that exhausted.

I have been tempted so many times to end this. I’ve pictured him falling from a cliff, body dashing against rocks in utter fatality. I wouldn’t morn the loss of him, I’d fucking relish it.

I wonder when I turned into this person that I am now, curled up into a ball under the sheets and flinching when I hear him stumble in. It’s my twisted sense of duty that has made me who I am now.

Fuck….even I don’t believe that.

The bed behind me sinks under his weight as he lays down beside me. His breath on the back of my neck is hot and sickly sweet. His hands snake around me and I have to fight the urge to vomit at his touch. His hands wander roughly, uncaring and unfeeling, up my shirt.

I clench my eyes tightly and pretend to be somewhere, anywhere but here. It used to work….but pretending doesn’t help anymore.

No matter how hard I try, I stay exactly where I am.

Pinned in.


I can’t do this for one more second. Not tonight. Not ever fucking again.

Liz Parker was my balance. Liz Evans is my nightmare. Eva….Eva is my salvation.

His hands move lower down, inching towards my inner thigh.

The anger starts to boil beneath my skin. Hot, warm, blessed rage pours past the wall I’ve kept it carefully sheltered behind for so many years.

I clench my fists tightly.

My nails dig into my palm. I relish the blood that flows from the half moon cuts. I relish the pain. Its more real than anything I’ve felt in such a long time.

“No,” I spit out the word like venom. It strikes at him forcefully and his grip on me tightens.

“What the fuck did you just say?”

I know he’s angry, and slightly taken off guard. I roll from his grip effortlessly and sit up, looking him square in the eyes….. His eyes flash dangerously. There’s nothing there, no soul, no light, just self serving riotous indignation.

His arrogance is the last straw. You wanna play, Maxie boy? Oh, We’ll fucking play alright.

“I, Said. No.”

I grind out each word slowly and bitterly.

The veins in his neck bulge as his face grows red. He expects me to back down, to bow down to him and apologize. Servent to her king. Slave to her master.

Not anymore.

“You ungrateful bitch.”

I see his hand raise. I see that he intends to try to hurt me again, beat me into submission like he usually does. But I’ve had it. Eva’s back and god does it feel amazing.

I grab his arm as he tries to strike. His eyes grow wide and I laugh just a little at his utter shock. He squirms, but I hold tight.

“You will never. EVER, touch me again.”

The crack of his wrist snapping makes me smile.


Liz shuffled her feet, kicking a small rock that lay in her path. She shivered as a sudden gust of cool air bit at her back. She shoved her hands deeper into the pockets of her worn leather jacket.

Step by endless step, she wandered the streets of Seattle for the first time in what seemed like years, but had really only been months. She relished the anonymity. The way the dismal urban landscape bleed together in varying shades of black and gray, the way every passerby’s face seemed to meld into an unrecognizable blur.

She smiled to herself, eyes cast forward, head held high. As strange as it was to admit, she had missed this, had missed life.

They had stayed hidden, her and Maria, since they’d fled her family. Liz had remained inside, to frightened of being recognized from the incident at the hospital to dare venture out. Today she had decided to brave the world though, even against Maria’s insistence that it was to soon, that she may be recognized. Liz had tried to soothe her. She wanted her to keep her sanity? Well staying holed up in the shit hole they had been hiding out in was defiantly not the way to do it.

She needed something more.

For all the darkness that still raged within her, she needed a light to balance it.

Liz took a deep breath, inhaling the chilly air and marveling in delight at the icy chill that ran down her spine. The smells here were so much different than they were back home. She missed the warm dry heat of Roswell, the desert perfumes that blew teasingly around her whenever the wind shifted.

It wasn’t often that she thought of home anymore, but after seeing Max, seeing her sister, and the man who was probably very well Ben’s twin, made her yearn for a bit of that familiar comfort.

Maxie…. Thinking about her still hurt. Years of resentment couldn’t be washed away in so little time. She’d talked to Maria about this, worked through what she could. She wasn’t going to let her past eat at her anymore, at least not outwardly. She refused to put Maria through all of that again.

Keep it inside, she thought bitterly. Be the good little solider.

She shrugged off her thoughts, clenching her fists in determination. She craved the pills…craved the numbness, blessed release. That was what she wanted… but it sure as hell wasn't what she needed.

What she needed was a focus. A distraction to keep her mind occupied and her hands busy. Someplace that didn’t revolve around drugs and debauchery like her last job. She smiled to herself. Although dancing in the cage at BT had been awfully fun. Men had been plentiful, the money had been good, and the drugs had flowed freely. But that wasn’t what she needed right now, she needed a job where she could lay low, someplace that she could blend in seamlessly with the crowd.

It would be even easier now that she’d altered her appearance. She’d lengthened her hair down to her mid back and let her naturally straight locks spiral into loose curls, highlighted by a warm burgundy that only shone noticeably in the light. Her piercings were gone, as where any visible tattoos. She hadn’t been able to alter her eye color though and it was still obvious that the sparkle was missing from them, the constant flicker of emotion that made her who she was had still not returned.

But how do you back who you used to be when you constantly lie about who you really are?

Liz’s eyes wandered the street, her ears opening and listening carefully to conversations from passers by. Her vision narrowed in on a tall, lanky man on a bike arguing with a petite black woman leaning up against the outside wall of a business. The smile on the man, the dopey grin that spread lazily from ear to ear reminded her of Alex. Her heart warmed a little.

Liz took a deep breath and steadied herself. Her back straightened, shoulders squared off, and she glided over to the pair like an alley cat on the prowl. Sultry and loose.

“Lookie here, boo,” the woman said, waving her finger in front of the mans face. “Alls I’m sayin is that I know my girl, and she don’t play it like that. Specially with your narrow ass.”

Liz cleared her throat and caught the pairs attention. They both turned their heads, the man immediately smiling and the woman taking her in with more than a little interest. Liz smirked, she knew that look well. Maria gave it anytime she met a new potential playmate.

“I’m sorry to just butt in here,” Liz said sweetly. She was good at working the charm when she needed to. She supposed it was something ingrained in her DNA. Hell, she may as well bat her eyelashes and completely captivate them. Work what your maker gave you, she thought in amusment. “Please excuse me, but,’ she pointed to the sign on the door beside them, “Do either of you happen to work here?”

The man looked confused in a sweet adorable way that made Liz want to giggle, but he soon caught her meaning. “Yes M’am, Jam Pony. Do you need a delivery to be packaged? I, I mean if you have a package…” He flushed, embarrassed at his stammering. “I mean, I’m excellent at package delivery.”

Liz laughed, for the first time in what seemed like forever.

'I'll just bet you are," she purred with a grin. It felt good to be playful, but foreign at the same time. It didn’t even sound right in her ears.

The woman cocked one eyebrow and delivered a swift slap to the back of the mans head.

“Ow!” He murmured, rubbing at his head. “That hurt!.”

“Please pay no attention to the fool next to me.” The woman smiled warmly at her and extended a hand, which Liz gladly took without hesitation. “I’m Original Cindy, but most peeps just call me OC and this demented male,” She thrust a thumb in his direction, “is Sketchy.”

“It’s nice to meet you,” Liz answered in genuine happiness. Something about these people felt safe, they reminded her of they way her friends had once been. Conversation was easy. “I’m Liz…..” she paused, thinking of the new last name she and Maria had agreed upon, “Trent. Liz Trent. So…. You do work here?”

OC nodded her head rhythmically to her own unheard beat. “All day, every day. Is there something we can help you with, boo?”

Liz felt almost high, blissfully euphoric to be making human contact. Not that she didn’t enjoy Maria’s company, but the ranting was making her carefully pieced together self start to crack again ever so slightly. “I… actually, I was wondering if you guys were hiring?”

OC smiled….. Sketchy continued to stare.

Liz laughed to herself. The poor boy looked almost dazed. She wondered briefly if maybe he’d fallen off his bike one to many times. She made a mental note to wear a helmet next time she rode on one. “Normal is the boss man, so you’ve gotta talk to him,” OC stated, “But he’s usually looking for reliable employees. You seem like you may be able to sache your way into his good graces.”

Liz rolled her eyes and let out a sigh of relief. “Oh that’s fantastic.”

OC brazenly put an arm around Liz’s shoulder and pulled her towards the door. “Come on boo, I’ll take you in to meet him. We could use a girl like you around here.”

Liz followed gratefully through the door giving one last look behind her and shooting Sketchy a playful wink. She sighed at the hustle and bustle of the business when the were inside. This is what she needed. She could feel it. This felt right….

Her balance faltered and OC let go as Liz ran smack into something.

She hadn’t been paying attention, hadn't noticed the…., (she gulped deeply,) the warm….(her eyes inched up), muscled,….(her nostrils flared at the pure masculine smell), body that had stepped into her path.

Hazel eyes sparkled playfully and she groaned inwardly at the smirk on his lips.

Seriously? She said to herself. Three months in hiding and I deal with this on day one of normalcy?

Fate had a seriously demented since of humor.

“Well, well, well,” he said, paying absolutely no attention to OC who stood watching them in utter confusion. “Where the hell have you been?”

Liz bit on her bottom lip and moaned.


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