521 (M+M & CC/UC, AU, Adult) [Complete]

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April
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Part 61

Post by April »

Leila: Okay, first off, I love the new auction banner in your sig. :lol:
As for Maria...I hope she will soon be the Maria we know and love. Ass kicking.
It was really hard to write dreary, depressed Maria, because that's not how Maria was on the show and that's not how she's been thus far in the fic. But she's going through something heartbreaking, and she's actually got a lot more to go through, so . . . we'll see how things go with her.
it's really amazing to see how the most likeable character of this fic-Michael- can transform to the recently most dislikeable person. it shows what an amazing writer you are April.
Thank you! I think the 521 characters are the most dynamic characters I've ever worked with, so it's fun to take the nice guy and have him infuriate people. Fun but sad.

Christina:
Aww, I like Michael. I really do. I just don't like him under the influence...of Isabel.
Under the influence of Isabel. :lol: Nice.
I'm such a horrible person, but I want Liz to go with Max to Phoenix.
I think you'll like this update then. ;)

Krista:
I'll have you know, April, that I live next to Compton, and parts of it are not that bad.
Oh, so it's just a stereotype then? I still think I'll stay away. Man, I lock my doors just driving through South Omaha in Nebraska. :lol:
It's quite interesting how Max really isn't as despicable as he once was. Maybe there's only room for one person of pure evil in that town, and now that Isabel's back, she's it, so Max has to wind down in comparison.
I had a feeling that once Isabel came back, people were going to start being a bit more receptive to Max. I think part of it is that he really has made some changes and become a slightly better person, and part of it is that, like you said, Isabel's back and there's that comparison between the two of them.

Eva:
I sill can't believe they did the test! I was pretty sure Isabel would do everything not to do it. I really thought Tess was right. That the baby wasn't Michael's. Now I'm doubting...
Well, we know that Isabel's a liar and she's lied to Michael before, but the big question still remains: Is she lying about this baby?

Nove:
You know last time I wondered where is the music. I miss April's music. And then today you brought it back. That's awesome! I liked it.
Well, I'm glad to know you take the time to listen to it! I'm bringing some music by today, too. ;)
I'm so glad he's letting Kyle in and he apologized. That's huge. It means Michael is still in there. He's just having the hardest time finding his centre amongst the chaos.
Exactly. Couldn't have said it better myself.
I'm not sure what Max was up to with Liz. It seemed a little desperate and lonely on his part.
I'm glad that came across, because Max was definitely up to something in the last part and you'll find out what it is in this part.

nibbles:
Although, I think that his desire to go ahead with the paternity test despite the risks shows that he has some doubts which he's suppressing.
Definitely. Michael is trusting what Isabel says because he feels like, as the father of this baby, he has to trust her. But at the same time, he remembers how she betrayed him, and he knows what she's capable of. Hence the paternity test. Before he delves into this situation any farther, he realizes he has to be sure.

spacegirl23:
I'm really glad that Kyle's such a good friend, and that he's standing by Michael. While I know that sweet innocent Kyle is not a match to Isabel's professional manipulation, I'm still relieved that part of Michael's pre-baby life is still with him.
Kyle is there to support Michael right now much in the way Tess is supporting Maria. They're good friends.

Alison:
Ok, so either that means things are going to get awesomely better or horribly worse.
Possibly both.
Is it bad of me that I actually cheered Max for making that sexist baby maker remark to Isabel? Oh god, I'm a horrible person who has just set back feminism back sixty years . I think it was just that it was just so effective in insulting her and pissing her off. If he'd said it to anyone else, I would hate him forever, but seeing as it's Isabel, he's awesome. I'm so contrary . I just HATE Isabel so much that I love it whenever someone gets the upper hand over her, no matter how they do it. Does that make sense?
Hell yeah that makes sense! Even though I'm a feminist, I really enjoyed writing that line solely because of the fact that it was directed at Isabel! :lol: I think Max is one of the few people out there, perhaps the only person, who has what it takes to get the upper hand on Isabel; and that's why a lot of readers are rooting him on right now. He's, like, the only person who's bad enough to even compete with her.

Ginger:
Priceless. Adds a little humor to an otherwise angsty couple of days all around.
Yeah, I really wanted the "Ladies Night" part to add a little comedy to all this drama. Plus, it was another opportunity to showcase Kyle's persistent bad luck. :lol:

tequathisy:
I find it hilarious that while the world is falling down and everybody else is neck deep in the Isabel mess, Max has time to go out and blackmail a politician. Classic.
:lol: Max sort of lives in his own world, doesn't he?
I'm so dreading the 'big things' to come. Because I know they're going to be bad thigns. Aren't they?
I don't know, it depends how you look at it. There is a lot more angst, though, so just . . . buckle up and hold on for the ride.


Alright, so this is a very Dreamer-heavy part. It's kind of a break from some of all the other things going on.

The lyrics included in this part are to a song everyone's probably heard before, "Creep" by Radiohead. (Eva, we have such similar tastes in music!) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aWvJ6JL5EGI&fmt=18 I really wanted to find a song that suited Max in this story, and this one totally does. Because no matter what he does, he's always going to be a creep. I love this song.









Part 61








Liz’s mouth kept falling open as Max gave her a tour of the plane. “This is crazy,” she raved. “But nice.”

He loved that awed look in her eyes and was thrilled to be able to impress her.

“My whole house could fit in here,” she said as they strolled into the lounge. It was a serene room with mauve-colored walls, plush white couches, a fully-stocked bar, and a big-screen TV. “I could get used to this,” she said.

“Who couldn’t?” He’d practically lived on that plane in high school back when his father had been introducing him to some of the intricacies of the business.

Liz picked up the remote control for the TV and asked, “Does this work?”

“Yeah, go ahead.”

She aimed the remote at the TV and turned it on. It was on a soft-porn cable channel. She laughed excitedly. “Too bad I wasn’t born rich.”

He shrugged. “It has its advantages.”

She turned off the TV and sat down on the couch, looking out the window as the plane flew above the ground. “Wow,” she said. “Everything looks so small down there.”

“Everything is,” Max said, sitting down beside her. “Except my hotels.”

“Of course.” She smiled and kept looking out the window. She actually seemed like she was having a good time.

A male flight attendant approached the two of them with a tray of drinks in his hand. “Mr. Evans, a martini?” he offered.

“Yes, thank you.” Max took a martini off the tray. Alcohol was good stuff.

“And you, Miss?” The flight attendant held the tray out to Liz.

“Oh, um . . .” She hesitantly took a martini as well. “Thanks.”

Max waited until the flight attendant had gone away to raise his glass in the air. “A toast,” he said, “to our Arizonan adventure.”

“Hmm.” Liz gently tapped her glass against his, but she didn’t take a drink when he did. She brought the glass up to her lips, then brought it back down again.

“What?” he said. “I’m not trying to get you drunk so I can sleep with you.”

“Yeah, well, it wouldn’t be the first time you’ve done that to a girl.”

“True enough,” he acknowledged. “But I wouldn’t do that to you. Besides . . . I wouldn’t need to.” He knew immediately after those words left his mouth that he shouldn’t have said them.

“Are you calling me a slut?”

He grinned. No choice but to roll with it now. “Maybe.”

She made a face of disgust and set her drink down on the table next to the couch. “Ugh, I knew . . .” She rose to her feet and started pacing back and forth in front of him. “I knew this was a bad idea.”

“Then why’d you come along?”

“Because I’m an idiot,” she stated plainly. “What is this, Max? The private jet, the martinis, the trip out of town . . . is this a date?”

He waited a moment before answering. She didn’t seem to think it was a date, so it wasn’t. “No,” he said. “But if it was, it’d be our first real date, and a damn memorable one at that.”

“We went to your dad’s party that one time,” she reminded him. “I thought that was our first and only date.”

“That doesn’t count.” He’d gone to that party out of obligation, and he’d dragged her along.

“And neither does this,” she said.

“I know.” He could tell she was starting to get pissed at him, and that excited him.

“We’re not getting back together, Max.”

“I sense that.”

“You’re just as despicable as you always were.”

He looked away for a moment. Despicable. He knew it was true, but . . . damn. There was just no good to be found in that word. “Yeah,” he said after a moment. “You, too.”

“Max!”

“What? I’m joking. I’m having fun here. You should try it.”

“Max.” She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at him. “I refuse to have any more fun with you ever again, so don’t even try to persuade me.”

He grinned. There she was. There was his mate. She’d been keeping herself restrained ever since she’d gotten back to town, but that fire he saw starting to flicker in her eyes . . . it turned him on.

“Holler at me when we get to Phoenix,” she said, heading down the left hallway of the plane to the smaller lounge. She probably wasn’t going to speak to him again until they got to Arizona.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Michael walked out of the bathroom that afternoon after his shower, towel-drying his hair. Isabel was sitting on the couch, groaning and reaching around to rub her back. She looked uncomfortable.

“You okay?” he asked, setting his towel down on the arm of the couch.

“Yeah,” she reassured him. “Backache.”

He nodded. “Yeah, you got a lot of weight to carry around there.”

She shot him a look. “Thanks.”

“No, I mean . . . I don’t mean it like that. Just right now, because of the baby.”

“I’ll lose the weight soon,” she said. “Thank God. These backaches are killer, makes me dread what the contractions are gonna feel like.”

He definitely didn’t envy her or any woman when it came time to baby delivery. “Anything I can do?” he asked. He wanted to help.

“A massage?” she ventured. “Please.”

A massage. He thought about it for a moment. Since Isabel had been back, he’d done his best not to have his hands on her, and that had been working out well. But if her back was hurting and he could do something to make it hurt less . . . “Okay,” he agreed, sitting down beside her. She scooted forward on the couch, and he placed his hands on her shoulder blades. “How’s that?” he asked, even though he knew that wasn’t where her back was aching.

“It’s actually my lower back that hurts the most,” she told him.

“Okay.” He moved his hands lower, and then lower still. This felt . . . kind of strange. He began to move both his thumbs around in small circles, hoping to relieve some of the tension. He was normally good at massages, but he doubted this was going to be one of his bests.

“Mmm, that’s nice,” Isabel said encouragingly. She smiled at him and started up a conversation as he massaged her. “You know, we haven’t really discussed what we’re gonna name him. We should decide.”

He felt horrible for not even thinking about it.

“Any ideas?”

Not a one, he thought. He couldn’t just pluck some random name out of the stratosphere, either, so he admitted, “I don’t know. We could look up name meanings online, maybe get some ideas.”

“Yeah,” she agreed. “Or we could just make it easy on ourselves and name him after his father.”

Which is me, he thought. Even though they hadn’t gotten the paternity test results back, he felt sure of that much. “But do you think people would call him M.J. for Michael, Jr.?” he asked.

She shook her head. “We won’t let them.”

He wasn’t sure how he felt about naming his son after him. It was fine, except . . . he didn’t want to do that unless he was a good role-model, gave his son something positive to live up to. He didn’t feel like a good role model lately. “Well, that’s one option,” he said. He supposed it was a better name than Phillip or Max. “What’s his last name gonna be?”

“Guerin,” she replied without hesitation. “I was thinking about Evan as a middle name, ‘cause . . . well, you know.”

“Yeah.”

“But if you had other ideas . . .”

“Well . . .” He had always imagined passing his own father’s name onto his son, either as a first name or as a middle name. But Isabel probably wouldn’t go for it. “No, that’s fine,” he said, removing his hands from her back. She seemed to be doing better now.

“Michael Evan Guerin,” she proclaimed. “I like it.” She turned to face him and said, “Thank you for the massage.”

He nodded. “You feel better?”

“Much. Thank you.”

“Okay.” He stood up, picked his wet towel up off the couch, and headed back to the bathroom. He stopped on the way though and turned back around. “Oh, uh . . . what about Lamaze class?” he asked. He’d spaced it off, but he remembered her talking about it. “Weren’t we supposed to be doing that?”

“We were. But Dr. Monroe told me I’d be better off taking it easy at home these next few weeks. I’m so far along now. Don’t worry, though. I’ve done my own research. I’m ready for labor whenever it happens.”

Good, he thought, because I’m not. “Well, I hope I’ll be able to help.”

“You’ll help a lot just by being there,” she assured him. “But if you want, there’s something you could for do for me before the baby’s born. Or . . . with me, I should say.”

He dropped the towel he was drying his hair with onto the floor and was too nervous to pick it up again. What was she talking about, exactly?

“Lots of moms take pictures of their pregnant bellies to show their kids when they’re older,” she said, “and I have some pictures, but not a lot. I just thought to myself, ‘Hey, your son’s father is an artist. Why not put that talent to good use?’”

At least she wasn’t saying what he’d thought she was saying. “So you want me to . . .”

“I want you to paint me, Michael,” she said. “Again.”

He immediately flashed back to the last time he’d done that. It had been their last morning together. She’d been asleep in bed, and he’d dragged his easel and canvas into the bedroom to paint her. She’d dumped him that night over dinner, while he had the ring in his pocket. “I don’t know,” he said. Ever since then, he’d only painted one other person, and he loved that other person more than he’d ever loved Isabel.

“Come on,” she urged, rising to her feet. “It’ll be fun. And special. You won’t just be painting me, you know. You’ll be painting a part of you.” She placed her hands atop her stomach and asked, “What could be more beautiful than that?”

Maria, he thought, and he felt horrible for thinking it. How could anything be more beautiful than his own son? It wasn’t right. He wasn’t right.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“I’m so tired of classes,” Maria groaned when she and Tess got home late that afternoon. They both walked in the apartment and tossed their backpacks on the floor. “I can’t believe we’re only halfway through the semester.”

“I’m working full-time this summer, so it’s not like I’m gonna get a break,” Tess grumbled.

“I’ve gotta find another job.” Maria sighed heavily. “Life sucks.”

“Yeah,” Tess agreed. “But at least we only have a week left ‘til spring break.”

Maria flopped down on the couch, feeling defeated in all aspects. “And what an awesome spring break it’s gonna be. Our vacation plans got shot to hell right about the time the Core Four became two very distinct groups of two.”

“I know,” Tess agreed, throwing herself into her favorite recliner. “But what about the Britney Spears concert? We still have tickets.”

“Yeah, the tickets Michael gave us for Christmas.” Maria just wasn’t in a concert kind of mood. “You should go, Tess, but I don’t think I’m gonna.”

“But I can’t go without you.” Tess frowned. “I’ll just sell the tickets. I’ll probably sell the ones I was gonna use with Kyle, too. God, we’re so depressing.”

“Mmm-hmm,” Maria agreed. She was in a very dark, dreary place, and she was starting to wonder if she’d ever be happy again.

“It’s probably just as well,” Tess said. “Spring break or not, everything’s a mess right now. Who could party at a time like this?”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Max and Liz arrived at the party about an hour after it had started. They took a limo. It was Liz’s exposure to high-society all over again.

“I can’t believe you bought me this dress,” she said as she and Max headed towards the building. The party was being held in a fancy restaurant called Smithson’s.

“Looks good on you,” Max said. “Besides, you couldn’t show up wearing what you were.”

“Gee, thanks.” Liz pulled up on the sparkling black strapless number Max had purchased. It really was a beautiful dress, but he seemed to be under the false impression that she was a C-cup. It kept falling down. Maybe that was what he wanted. He was such a prick. “Hopefully this is more exciting than your dad’s party,” she grumbled, not at all excited to be there.

“It will be,” he promised, holding out his arm as they approached the entrance. “Ready?”

She took a deep breath and linked her arm with his. She was as ready as she’d ever be.

“Mr. Evans, Ms. Evans,” the doormen greeted as they pulled open the big double doors for them.

Liz wrinkled her forehead in confusion as they walked into the restaurant. Ms. Evans?

There were lots of people standing around talking, just like they had been at the Phillip’s party. There was a man sitting at a grand piano in the corner, lending music to the room. And drinks were flowing. Of course.

“Why’d that guy call me Ms. Evans?” she asked Max as she once again tugged her dress upward with her free hand. “Does he think we’re married?” Wouldn’t that have made her Mrs. Evans?

“No. He thinks you’re Isabel,” Max said. “Let him think that. In fact, let everyone think that.”

“What?”

Max slowly turned to face her, biting his bottom lip. “I have a confession to make.”

“Oh, here we go.” Liz glanced around quickly, trying to scope out the most inconspicuous exit so she could slip out unnoticed.

“I didn’t invite you along just to spend time with you,” he admitted. “I need your help.”

“Seriously?”

“Yes. You see that guy over there?” He pointed to a short man with dark grey hair. He was surrounded by people and seemed to be talking to all of them at once. He had a very grandpa-ish vibe to him.

“Who is that?” Liz asked.

“That’s Dale Smithson. This is his party.”

“Really?” He didn’t strike Liz as the corporate type. “Is he a jerk like your dad?”

“No, actually, he’s not. He’s a gold mine, hit it big in the restaurant business . . . hence the restaurant we’re in. It’s a family business, though, see. His wife, his kids . . . everyone’s involved. Oh, how sweet. Now I need his money, but I’m not gonna get it unless I appeal to his good, old-fashioned values. That’s why I brought my ‘sister’ along.”

“Oh my god.” He’d tricked her. She didn’t even know why she was surprised.

“Yeah, see, if you pretend you’re Isabel and he thinks we’re running my business together, that’s gonna appeal to him big time. Twin siblings uniting in the wake of their dear old dad’s death . . . it’s practically poetic. He’s a sucker for that sort of thing. He’ll start to think we’re like-minded business men, and then he’ll considering investing. That’s all I want.”

“Why didn’t you just bring the real Isabel along?” she asked.

“Unwed, pregnant mother-to-be doesn’t exactly scream family values,” he explained. “Besides, she says she won’t help me anymore after I started you and Tess on your little investigation. Good job on that, by the way. A diary steal? I haven’t seen one of those since middle school.”

Liz ignored that last part. “Why not bring one of the women who works for you? They’d actually know what to talk about.”

“True,” he acknowledged, “but none of them would look as good in this dress.” He eyed her up and down suggestively.

“Oh, stop it,” she snapped. “It’s a size too big, and I’m pissed. I thought this was gonna be . . . an excursion, not a scam.”

“Just adjust,” he told her. “Okay?”

She rolled her eyes and sighed in annoyance. Whatever, she thought. She was there now. She figured she might as well give it a shot. “What do I have to do?”

“Lie your ass off. Shouldn’t be too hard.” He grinned. “You see that guy with the Botox smile talking to the bleach blonde with the Double D’s?” He pointed out two people standing close to Dale Smithson.

“Yeah.”

“Kayla and Alan Smithson, the offspring. She heads the PR department. He’s in accounting. They’re our targets.”

“Targets?” He made it sound like a military operation.

“Smithson’s kryptonite.” Max smirked. “If they tell him it’s a good idea to invest with me, he’ll do it without a second thought.”

Liz surveyed the Smithson siblings. They were both very attractive. Kayla had nearly white blonde hair, long, all the way down her back. She was wearing a hot pink dress, and Liz couldn’t spot a bodily imperfection on her. Alan had curly dark hair, broad shoulders, and that whole too-good-looking-to-be-true thing going on. “So . . . what, we’re gonna talk to them?” Liz asked.

“Are you kidding?” he grunted. “We’re gonna flirt with them. It’ll work, trust me. They’re young and horny like us.”

Liz’s mouth dropped open. “I’m not gonna sleep with that guy.”

“I didn’t say you had to. That wouldn’t really promote our fake family values, now would it?”

“Max, you’re so condescending.”

“I know. Now just distract him with coy smiles and cheerful dialogue. And cleavage. The dress should help with that. If it falls down, don’t bother pulling it back up. Then he won’t even realize you don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“And what’re you gonna do?”

“I’m gonna make Kayla Smithson, who I haven’t seen in years, by the way, feel like the sexiest girl in the room,” he explained. “Although truthfully, that title belongs to you.”

She felt herself blushing, and she hated that he could still have that effect on her. “I can’t believe I’m doing this,” she said.

“Buckle up. Here they come.” Max plastered an incredibly huge, unrealistic smile on his face as Dale, Kayla, and Alan Smithson all approached. Dale was up front, of course, his two children flanking him.

“Mr. Smithson,” Max said, extending his hand for a handshake, “wonderful party.”

“Thank you, Max.” Dale shook his hand, staring at him for a moment. “You know, I do believe it’s been over a decade since I last saw you in person.”

“It’s been awhile,” Max agreed.

“It certainly has.” Dale waited a moment, then said, “I was sorry to hear about your father.”

“It was somewhat unexpected,” Max said, “but we’re all coping. Thank you, sir, for your condolences.”

Dale nodded. “Oh, you remember Kayla and Alan, don’t you? My children.”

“Of course,” Max said, shaking hands with both of them. “Mostly I remember what I see in pictures, but . . . I’ve heard a lot about these two. Up-and-comers here in Phoenix, isn’t that right?”

Dale smiled proudly. “Most definitely.”

Liz held one hand to her stomach. This kind of conversation was absolutely disgusting. It practically made her feel sick. It was so superficial and meaningless. Although the Smithsons did seem a hell of a lot nicer than Phillip Evans.

“I don’t believe any of you have met my sister,” Max said, placing a hand on Liz’s back. “Isabel, this is Dale Smithson, Kayla, and Alan. Everyone, this is my twin sister.”

“Hi,” Liz said, waving nervously. “I’m Liz . . . abel. Isabel. Isabel Evans. That’s me.”

“Oh, of course. You wouldn’t remember me, but your father introduced you to me when you were two years old,” Dale Smithson said. “It’s wonderful to see you again, and all grown up now.”

“All grown up.” She pulled up on her dress self-consciously. Dale Smithson didn’t seem to have a wife hovering about, so hopefully he wasn’t getting any pervy ideas.

“Isabel runs Evans Hotels with me,” Max lied through his teeth.

“Really?” Dale sounded shocked. “Phillip decided to leave the company to both of you?”

“Actually, he only left it to me, but I brought Isabel on as an equal partner in management,” Max kept on. “She’s got a great mind for business, and she’s my sister. There’s no way I could do this without her.”

Liz forced herself to smile. If the real Isabel could hear this, she’d probably be so outraged that she’d go into labor.

“I have a lot of respect for that,” Dale Smithson told Max.

“Daddy always says loyal men are loyal to their family first and foremost,” Kayla piped up. God, Liz thought, she even has a beautiful voice. It was that mixture of high-pitched and low-pitched that amounted to perfect pitch. She noticed the way she was eyeing Max, and she tensed.

“I couldn’t agree more,” Max said.

“Well, I’m very happy to have you here,” Dale said, giving Max a pat on the shoulder. “Both of you. Enjoy the party. Let me know if there’s anything you need.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“Thank you,” Liz practically whispered.

Kayla and Alan stuck around after their father left. Max wasted no time getting to work. “Oh, Kayla, you PR goddess,” he said, hooking his arm with hers. “You have to give me your secrets. I’m new at this, you know.”

Kayla smiled as he led her towards the bar. “Seems to me you’re doing just fine.”

Liz rolled her eyes, not even caring if Alan noticed.

“I’m so sorry,” Alan said, “but I didn’t quite catch your name. Isabel, was it?”

“Yes, it was. And still is,” she fibbed. “And you’re Alan. Max told me all about you. He said you’re an accountant.”

“Well, I’m not actually an accountant,” Alan admitted. “I’m the guy who bosses all the accountants around.”

“Well, that’s very important. I boss my accountants around all the time. Because I’m a business girl.” She was so not pulling this off.

“I’m sure you do a very good job,” Alan said, apparently not sensing anything was off. “By the way, that’s a lovely dress.”

Liz glanced down. It was slipping again. So he’s distracted by the sight-seeing, she thought. That’s fine. It would keep her from getting caught in the lie. “Thank you,” she said. “That’s a lovely . . . watch.”

“Rolex.”

“Of course.” She’d never even seen a real-life Rolex before. It didn’t look like anything special. “I’m sorry if I seem nervous,” she apologized. “It’s just, I haven’t been to many of these parties before, not even when Phillip . . . you know my dad, was running things.”

“It’s so unfortunate that he died so young,” Alan said sympathetically.

“Well, he was an ass.” Oh, crap. An alarmed look crashed across her face, and she tried to recover. “But I miss him. Lots.” Family values, family values . . .

“Family is family.”

“Got that right. He was, uh . . . determined.” That seemed to be the most complimentary word she could think of to describe Phillip Evans. “But he didn’t let me do the things my . . . brother got to do.” She couldn’t believe she had just referred to Max as her brother. So creepy. So wrong.

“Well, at least Max is turning things around,” Alan said, “making this a family affair.”

Her eyes bulged in panic. “There’s no affair!”

“Oh, I just mean . . . a family state of affairs. A family business,” Alan clarified.

“Oh. Right.” Had she just blown it? She pulled the sides of her dress down a little bit more, and Alan just smiled at her.

“Max seems like a good guy,” he said.

Liz looked over at the bar. Max and Kayla were toasting drinks. “Oh, yeah,” she said, “he’s a prince.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Max drank only a little wine, pretending to drink a lot. He’d already tossed back quite a few in his office and on the plane. He couldn’t get tipsy and lose his focus. “So Kayla, how long has it been?” he asked.

“A long time,” she said. “Last time I saw you, I was wearing saddle shoes, and you were still in diapers.”

“Those were Pull-Ups,” he corrected.

“Whatever.”

He laughed a little. “Oh, that’s embarrassing.” The girl was hot as ever, though. He’d dig her even if she was still wearing the saddle shoes. Still, he’d done his fair share of blondes. He preferred brunettes.

“Look at us now,” she said.

“Look at us now,” he echoed. “You’re prettier than ever, and you’re your father’s right-hand man. Or woman, I should say.”

“Hmm, am I propelling the feminist movement forward?”

“I’d say so.” This girl was everything Isabel wanted to be: a guy-magnet, rich, and successful. Isabel would only ever be one of those things.

“Your sister seems nice,” Kayla remarked. “A little quiet.”

Max chuckled lightly. If only Kayla knew . . . Liz was a screamer. “Best sister ever,” he said. If Liz really had been born his sister, he’d be the chief proponent of incest advocacy.

“So how’s it feel to have a multi-million dollar completely under your control?” Kayla inquired, flipping her long blonde hair over her shoulder. “Is it everything you thought it’d be and more?”

“It’s . . . challenging,” he admitted, “but hopefully rewarding. To be honest, I’m not quite satisfied with the direction my father was taking it when he died. I wanna do something different, make Evans hotels more accessible and family-oriented. I want to promote fun.” And that was partially true. He fully intended on putting in some very fun strip clubs with eager-to-please strippers in them. “Isabel and I have developed some expansion plans for Santa Fe. We might even have room for one of your family’s restaurants if you’re interested.”

Kayla shrugged. “Well, you never know. We’re definitely interested in outreach to New Mexico.”

I’ve got this in the bag, Max thought, casting a side glance at Liz. She and Alan were talking quite a lot for two people who had never met prior to this night.

“You know, I know some guys in Santa Fe I could refer you to,” Kayla said. “For PR concerns.”

“I’d appreciate that. Thank you.” He felt like such a suck-up, saying ‘thank you’ all the time to these people. But he’d do whatever it took. He looked over at Liz again. What the hell? Now she and Alan were dancing together.

“Kayla,” he said, “I hope I’m not out of line by saying this, but you look absolutely ravaging tonight.”

She smiled confidently. “No, you’re not out of line. You’re just honest.” She leaned in and whispered in his ear, “You don’t look so bad yourself.”

Max grinned, hoping Liz was watching. He really wanted to make her as jealous as she was making him.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Michael brushed dark grey paint on his canvas clockwise to form a half circle. It wasn’t perfectly circular, of course, because it was supposed to be Isabel’s stomach. She was standing before him in his living room, wearing a thin, silver slip. (The skimpy wardrobe had been her idea.) Her right hand was resting atop her stomach, and her left hand was resting below. She was looking down at her belly adoringly, and her long hair was curtaining her face. She looked stunning, that much was true; but he was struggling with the painting.

He mixed in some white paint with the grey and worked on accenting her slip, trying to make it appear wrinkled and shiny like it was in reality. He was off his artistic game, though, and he knew it. He hurried through the painting because he didn’t want her to have to stand on her swollen ankles for too long. When he was done, he was . . . satisfied. Just satisfied. It definitely wasn’t the best thing he had ever painted. But at least it wasn’t the worst.

“You done?” Isabel asked.

He took a step back to survey his work some more. He didn’t want to mess with it anymore. “Yeah.”

“How’s it look?” She walked around the canvas to take a look at it. “Michael,” she gasped. “That’s so beautiful. Thank you.” She leaned in and gave him a quick, appreciate kiss on the cheek, then strode into the bedroom to change.

He folded his arms over his chest and furrowed his brow as he continued to stare at the painting. Pregnant women were beautiful subjects—almost every artist could agree on that. And the fact that he was painting his son more than he was painting Isabel was enough in itself to make the painting good, maybe the second best thing he had ever painted simply because it was his son. But that worried him. If he was painting a part of himself, shouldn’t it have been the very best thing he’d ever painted?

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Max and Liz sat together at the bar as the party at Smithson’s began to dwindle. Even though people were leaving, Max refused to walk out that door without some kind of reassurance that he had Dale Smithson’s money in his future.

“They’re talking. That’s a good sign,” he commented, keeping his eyes locked on Dale, Alan, and Kayla as Liz downed her third shot. “Wait for it.”

“I can’t believe you flew me here without telling me you wanted me to pretend to be Isabel,” she growled.

“If I’d told you, would you have done it?”

“No.”

“Exactly.” He intercepted her fourth shot glass when the bartender slid it towards her. “Stop,” he said.

“Are you cutting me off?”

“Yeah, a drunk sister would reflect badly on me.”

“I’m not drunk,” she said.

“I know. But keep going like this and you will be.” Truthfully, he was scared of what would happen if she got drunk. He didn’t want to hurt her.

“Fine. I’ll just sit here and be bored. What a party,” she grumbled sarcastically.

“I thought it was alright,” he said. It’d been a hell of a lot better than almost every other high society party he’d been to, mainly because Liz had been there. And also because Kayla was obviously into him. “You did good tonight,” he told his accomplice. “This Smithsons love you, or at least the pretend you. They think you’re sweet.” He laughed.

“They also think you’re nice,” she pointed out. “Stupid them.”

“Well, they may not be the brightest stars in the heavens, but they’re good people.”

“And what do you know about good people?” she asked, turning on her bar stool to face him directly.

“Absolutely nothing,” he admitted.

Liz looked over at the Smithson clan as they talked heavily together across the room and said, “I don’t get it. You told me once that you have to be shrewd to be successful. You said that’s what your dad told you. But I look at Dale Smithson and his kids, and they don’t seem shrewd at all. I actually like them.”

“I know,” Max said. He liked them, too. “That’s why it’s so easy to pull the wool over their eyes. Honestly, Evans Hotels, a family establishment?” He grunted. “Please. “My first order of business is to put a strip club in every building I own.”

“You’re such a guy.”

“You know it.” He fell silent as the Smithson’s approached them, and they both got down off their bar stools. Dale had a very optimistic look on his face.

“Max, Isabel, my children and I talked it over,” he said, “and we’re interested in your company. We like what you two stand for, and we foresee a mutually beneficial partnership in our future.”

Yahtzee, Max thought, smiling. “I think we foresee the exact same thing, don’t we, Isabel?”

“We sure do,” Liz agreed cheesily.

“We’ll be in touch,” Dale promised. “I’ll have my people call your people, see if we can work out an investment deal.”

“That sounds fantastic,” Max said. “Thank you, Mr. Smithson, for your consideration, and thank you for a lovely evening.”

“My pleasure. It was great to see you again; and Isabel, it was wonderful to meet you.”

“Thank you . . . sir,” Liz said.

Dale walked away to go bid farewell to the rest of his guests, and once again, Alan and Kayla stayed behind. Alan pulled a business card out of his pocket and approached Liz with it. “I know you’re from out of town,” he said, “but . . . here’s my number. Give me a call sometime.”

“Oh.” Liz took the card and glanced up at Max, then back at Alan. “Sure. Okay.”

“Great.” Alan bent down and gave her a kiss on the cheek. Max bristled and didn’t relax until he had walked away.

“Good to see you again, Max,” Kayla said, giving him a hug as she whispered in his ear, “I’d give you my number if you weren’t so sweet on your sister.”

Max couldn’t hide the alarm that displayed itself across his face as Kayla eased back from the hug.

“Shh,” she said, grinning, implying that she’d keep his secret. Either she knew Liz wasn’t his sister or she thought he had a thing for ‘Isabel.’ Either way, it was screwed up, so he was thankful for her not saying anything.

“Bye, Kayla,” he said.

“Bye.” She waved goodbye to both him and Liz and trotted after her father and brother.

“What’d she say?” Liz asked.

“Nothing. We got ‘em,” he said. “Let’s go.” He placed one hand in the small of her back and led her towards the door. Their limo was outside waiting for them.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“Well, Max, thank you for a perfectly stuffy, small-talk-filled evening,” Liz said as she strode into the hotel room. It was one of his hotels, of course, one of the best rooms. They were staying there for the night and flying back in the morning, apparently. Whatever. She didn’t even care. She just wanted to go to sleep, because she and Max had spent the whole day together now, and that made her very nervous. “So what would you do if I gave Alan a call?” she asked, kicking off her shoes. High-heels were really a killer. “Would you be jealous?”

Max grunted and loosened his tie. “It doesn’t matter. You won’t do it. If you wanted a nice guy, you’d still be dating Kyle.”

She rolled her eyes and pulled her dress upward again, supposing that was true.

“Did you have fun tonight?” he asked, unhooking his watch and setting it down atop the fireplace. Yes, there was a fireplace in the room. It was a far cry from the Budget Inn.

“Not really,” she said. “You know I hate those so-called parties. Plus, it wasn’t even me who was there; it was a . . . persona.” The last person on earth she wanted to be was Isabel Evans. She was even darker and more alone than Liz was. Plus, the whole pregnancy thing really had to suck. “I’m not doing this again, by the way. And if the Smithsons ask about me, you can just tell them Isabel took an extended vacation to Bermuda, and she’s probably never coming back. Oh, and if they ever meet the real Isabel . . . have fun explaining the drastic change in hair color, eye color, height, breast size.”

“Implants, contacts, dye job, and uh . . . yeah, height could be a problem,” he admitted. “Oh, well. They won’t ever meet her. And you don’t ever have to pretend to be Isabel again. You did your job and you did it well. I could compensate you.”

“Compensate?” she echoed. “With what?’

He grinned. “Whatever you want.”

“Oh my god, Max.”

“I was talking about money, sweetheart. But if you had other ideas . . .” He trailed off suggestively.

“No, no other ideas.” She pulled her dress up again. Stupid thing. “Don’t you even feel the slightest bit bad about what you did tonight? Because I feel bad, and I was only an accessory to the crime.”

“What crime?” he asked. “It’s not like I’m stealing. I’m just gonna . . . use his investment for something that goes against his morals.” He shrugged.

“Strip clubs?”

“Yeah.”

She gave him a look. If he really wanted to change, he wouldn’t be so focused on strip clubs.

“Or mini-golf,” he added. “Whatever.”

“You’re such a dick, you know?” she told him. “Oh, by the way, don’t think I haven’t noticed the one and only bed in this room. Crafty. But you’re sleeping on the floor.”

“But it’s a king-size,” he protested. “Hmm, all the more room to--”

“Roll around and have sex?” she filled in, knowing that was what he was going to say. “Yeah, I—just stop. Okay?”

He took off his jacket and set it down on the side of the bed. “What’re you afraid of, Liz?” he asked.

“You. Me.”

He stuffed his hands in his pockets and sauntered towards her, looking almost . . . timid and innocent for a moment. “Can I tell you something?” he asked.

“Please don’t.”

“You weren’t the only person pretending tonight,” he said. “I pretended we were on a date.”

“Oh . . .” She made a face of disgust and backed away from him. “I told you, Max . . . I told you it can’t be that. Why do you have to go there?” She brushed past him and headed into the bathroom. She flipped on the overhead light and tried to shut the door, but he followed her into the bathroom and barged in.

“Why won’t you go there with me?” he demanded.

She braced herself against the sink and looked at his reflection in the mirror. “Oh. Really, Max. Do you even have to ask? I left town because of you. I dropped out of college because of you.”

“And you came back because of me.”

She whirled around, looking at him incredulously. “Could you contemplate getting over yourself for, like, a minute? You’re not God’s gift to women. His curse, maybe, but not his gift.”

“Liz--”

“I left town to put myself back together, because you broke me!” she shouted, feeling tears spring to her eyes as the recent memory of heartbreak overwhelmed her. “I came back to deal with my problems, and it just so happens that you’re one of them. You’re always one of them.”

“You’re your problem, Liz,” he told her. “How’s that going, the dealing?”

“It was going fine until today, until your warped perception of a date came into play.”

“You could’ve stayed home!”

She knew she should have stayed in Santa Fe. She wished she’d stayed in Santa Fe and let him take this little trip all by himself. “If I’d known we’d be having this conversation, trust me, I would’ve stayed home,” she told him. “You could’ve smoke-screened those people without me. I know you. You’d find a way to pull it off. You didn’t need me to come along. You lied to me, just like you always do.”

He shrugged. “You’re right. I didn’t need you at that party tonight; I wanted you there. As middle school as it may sound, I was hoping you’d get jealous when I was flirting with Kayla.”

She grunted. “I think that worked in reverse.” Max had definitely expressed a non-verbal hostility towards Alan. “God, Max. Sex and money and jealousy and power . . . it’s all the same damn thing to you. You can’t distinguish one from the other. You clearly have no feelings . . .”

“That’s not true.”

“. . . which kind of makes you a sociopath.”

“Oh, give me a break!” he roared suddenly. “I’m not a monster. Not anymore. I’m a human being, too, you know.”

“But who you were is part of who you are, Max,” she explained, “and after this little display I saw tonight, I’m not so sure you’ve changed a bit.”

“I have,” he insisted.

“Or maybe that’s just what you want people to believe, so they give you a chance. Like I did.” She raked one hand through her hair, furious with herself. “God, like I stupidly did.” She shook her head, remembering the first night she had seen him, at a party of course, much different from the one they had attended tonight. “Look, Max, you took advantage of Maria physically—we all know this—but you took advantage of me in every other way. And I know I let it happen; I know I brought it on myself. But I sure as hell wasn’t asking for it, and . . . you know what? It doesn’t matter. I gave you a chance, because you made me believe you could change; and then you didn’t.”

He looked floored but managed to rebut. “First off, I didn’t make you believe anything. You did that all on your own. And for the record, I’m never gonna change into Alan Smithson or Kyle Valenti or Michael Guerin. You know that, so don’t even pretend it’s some big shock to hear it.”

“But you chose your job over me, Max!” she wailed. “And it’s not even a job you like.”

He fell silent for a minute, contemplatively. “I chose my whole lifestyle over you,” he informed her. “Was it selfish? Hell, yeah, it was selfish. But I’m selfish. For once in my life, I didn’t do the wrong thing. I may not have done the right thing, but you can’t stand here and argue that it was wrong. If I hadn’t dumped you, you would’ve stayed in town, and we would have self-destructed. Inevitably. But we’re different now. We can handle it.”

“When you were here before
Couldn’t look you in the eye
You’re just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry.”


“Speak for yourself.” She turned back around to face the mirror. She looked down at the sink and mumbled, “I don’t have any more chances to give you. It might kill me.”

“But don’t you get it?” he kept on. “You’re the only one who makes me less of a monster. Without you, I’ll end up just like me dad. And believe it or not, I don’t want that.”

“You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
I wish I was special
So fuckin’ special.”


She lifted her head again to talk to his reflection. “But it’s so not fair of you to put all this pressure on me,” she said. “And I don’t even know if I can believe anything you’re saying.”

“You make me feel things, Liz!” he roared suddenly. “Things I-I can’t even put into words, and it pisses me off. It’s so much easier to just use people and not care. I’ve done that for years. But I look at you now, and I wonder what you’re thinking, and I listen to what you’re saying and . . . God help me, I miss you when you’re gone.”

“But I’m a creep
I’m a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don’t belong here.”


She missed him, too, and she wished she didn’t.

He threw his hands up in the air angrily. “I could apologize for the rest of my life for what I’ve done to you and everyone else, and it’s never gonna be enough, so I’m not even gonna bother. But know that I can actually feel my heart beating right now, and that’s saying something, because before you, I didn’t even know I had one.”

“I don’t care if it hurts
I wanna have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul.”


She tensed briefly before turning around to look him in the eye again. She knew Max had a heart. She’d always known, even when he’d dumped her. She felt it beating when he was close to her. “But this isn’t fair,” she whispered, thinking of lucky girls like Tess and Maria who had great guys who loved them, great guys who would be with them again someday, probably for all time. “I’ll never get to be happy with you.”

“Maybe not,” Max acknowledged, “but with anyone else, you won’t even be content.”

“I want you to notice
When I’m not around
You’re so fuckin’ special
I wish I was special.”


She felt all the hairs on her body start to stand on end in anticipation. It was true. She didn’t want a fairy tale. She wanted . . . this. Whatever this was.

“You love me.”

She swallowed hard. “I love you,” she admitted shakily. “I don’t trust you.”

He stared right at her, looked her right in the eye and made her feel like she was going to melt away. “I don’t trust me, either.”

She felt her own heart jolt in her chest. Her skin buzzed as she gazed at him, and she couldn’t take it anymore. She threw herself against him, her arms around his neck, and kissed him.

“But I’m a creep
I’m a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don’t belong here
Oh, oh!”


Their mouths mated savagely, ferociously. He pulled her in so close to him that she could barely breathe, and her dress finally fell down as her body slid against his. He tangled one hand in her hair and dragged it through the strands, all the way down her side, his fingertips pressing insistently against her. When he reached behind her to yank the zipper of the dress down, she gasped and tossed her head back. He tugged downward on the dress, and she slithered out of it. Speed of light. She pressed her forehead against his and looked down at his white undershirt. Buttons. Buttons, too many buttons. She tore them off and slid the shirt from his shoulders, grinning as it fell to the floor.

“She’s running out
Again . . .”


He pulled her into the shower with him before she even knew what was happening and turned on the water. It was cold; his skin was hot. He backed her up against the shower and pressed his hands against the shower wall, one on either side of her, trapping her there. She pushed her thong aside, locking her eyes with him as she did so, and he growled and hoisted her up in his arms in one swift, easy maneuver.

“She’s running out . . .”

She wrapped her legs around his waist and her arms around his neck, watching in interest as he undid his pants and released his straining cock. He slid the tip of it up and down her slick folds and kissed her deeply. The water cascaded down on top of them, and just when she thought she couldn’t get any more breathless . . .

“She run . . . run . . . run
RUN!”


She literally screamed as he plunged inside her. Tearing her lips away from his, she craned her neck to the right as the feeling of being filled washed over her. He wasn’t gentle. He didn’t need to be. He buried his face in the side of her neck and literally bit down on her skin as he pushed deep inside her. Where he ended and she began was a mystery.

“RUN!”

She lurched forward, clinging tightly to his shoulders, but her hands slipped out of place because of the water. He kept his arms locked around her midsection and pressed her hard against the wall of the shower. She felt him urging her legs so far apart that she thought they might rip off. It was all she could do to keep from dying.

“Whatever makes you happy
Whatever you want
You’re so fuckin’ special
I wish I was special.”


He slowed his movements suddenly, brought both their bodies to a screeching halt. He leaned back and gazed at her. She felt her entire body heat up even more as his eyes roamed it. She knew he could see the lust in her eyes, hear the ragged pants of breath heaving her chest, and she felt herself grow red with embarrassment.

He lifted one of her hands off his shoulder and pressed it back against the slippery shower wall. He intertwined her fingers with his own, smiled at her, and then waited until she smiled back at him. He captured her lips between his and kissed her, plunging his tongue into his mouth as he pressed his hips forward again.

“But I’m a creep
I’m a weirdo
What the hell am I doin’ here?
I don’t belong here.”


The water was still cold, but she needed it to be colder. She reached out and touched the shower knob with trembling fingers. She turned it as far to the left as she could and gasped at the water rained down icy cold. She felt shivers run up and down her spine, but the heat flowing from Max’s body into hers warmed her to the core. He spent himself inside her only after she came, and he slumped against her in a wordless heap. All she wanted to do was stay in that frigid shower forever.

“I don’t belong here.”








TBC . . .

-April
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LOVE IS MICHAEL AND MARIA.
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April
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Part 62

Post by April »

nibbles:
I wish Michael had just taken Isabel's photograph. When her image didn't show up in the print (because beings without souls don't show up in photographs) it might have reminded Michael that she's Queen Satan.
:lol: Beings without souls.
I'm sad that Liz gave in to him though. He hasn't learned enough of a lesson to keep trying to be a good guy. In fact, he's just learned that by being sneaky and manipulative he can get exactly what he wants.
Max is definitely still learning, so now it's kind of a question of whether or not he can keep learning, or whether he's hit a wall.

Leila:
His selfishness will always stop him from being that 'good person' which others want him to be.
Right, Max will never be a good person, and that's something I've been hoping to make clear throughout the whole fic. Part of the problem is that no one--except for Liz--believes that he can be a good person. He's got his own sister telling him he's never going to be one of the good guys, telling him it's never gonna happen. Not so encouraging.

Ginger:
This Max has to be the biggest, I don't know what the right word is but pathetic asshole with a sense of humor sort of comes close.
Pathetic asshole with a sense of humor. Hmm, I like it. :D I'll admit, I think he can be funny sometimes, just because he'll say things that no other guy in this story will say.
As far as Liz is concerned I think her intelligence is confined to the printed word. If it's in a book with written instructions she's there otherwise she's missing a few screws.
This is something that I tried to draw from Canon Liz. And feel free to disagree with me, but I thought that Liz (particularly) in season 3, really followed her heart when it came to Max and not her head. She didn't always make the best choices as far as he was concerned. (Busted, anyone?) She put herself on the line for him, for the sake of loving him, a lot.

Nove:
It is quite fascinating and fun to sink down into this relationship. It's like you want to play in the dirt but you know your not suppose to but you can't help but get dirty too.
Nice analogy. Max and Liz's relationship in 521 = playing in the dirt. :lol: Nice.
Max surprisingly showed himself to Liz there. A very rare thing. It's intriguing. You can't help but want to uncover more about him and what makes him tick.
I'm glad that, after all these chapters, after over 1,000 pages, Max is still interesting enough that you want to peel back his layers. :)
Michael's painting a pregnant Isabel, oh my goodness. I felt horrible for him. That was such a intimate request.
Totally. And he tried, but it just went . . . okay.
This is probably weird but I felt like she took advantage of him in one of the worse ways because this was more than just what he does, it's a part of who he is. And she's just used it as means to try and get him to see her in a favourable light which she hopefully never will be. It just seem violating.
I hadn't really thought about it like this before, but it totally makes sense now that you mention it. Isabel took advantage of Michael's artwork and therefore took advantage of Michael.
Very fitting song for that moment.
I thought so, too. ;)

Alison:
Oh Max... I wish there was a sad head shaking smiley that slowly gave in to laughter that I could use for him. He's a disgrace. An evil, sick, twisted disgrace. But... I kinda like him.
I kind of like him, too! I think you can like Max without endorsing the horrible things he's done in the past. He's still an ass, though.
I'm thinking adoption for that kid, its the only way to give it a decent start at life.
Yeah, that's one the big tragedies here, that there is this baby coming into this world, and its mother is Isabel Evans. Regardless of who the father is . . . having her genes is enough to screw him up.

spacegirl23:
I don't know if I'm alone in feeling hopeful for M+M, but I do get a semblance of hope in this chapter. Granted, it's been days (feels like years!) since Michael and Maria spoke, but this is what I've been waiting for -- for Michael to really really miss Maria, for Maria to realize that she's not happy without Michael, and for Isabel's plans to get back together with Michael to slightly go awry. Fine, the bitch does live with him, and he got manipulated into a massage and a painting, but it's much much less than she's looking for. For that tiny victory, I'm really glad.
That's a good way to look at it! If Isabel had her way, she and Michael would be having sex right now. But obviously they're not doing that. So Thank God for small miracles.

tequathisy:
When is Maria going to fight back and show Isabel that she's not going to take it lying down? When is Maria going to decided she's not going to take it lying down? I miss the old Maria so much. This empty shell of a person is not Maria. She's sad and pathetic. Isabel broke her.
I know, it's sad. It was so hard to write her this way. But she's got a lot going on. And she's got nothing going on at the same time. It's all very confusing and painful for her. Right now, she is no condition to match up with Isabel. Isabel would destroy her right now.

Eva: Thanks, I'm glad you thought the lyrics were fitting!

killjoy:
To have someone you've had sex with many times and in many ways to pretend to be your sister...that's just wrong.But this is Max we're talking about here so why am I shocked?
:lol: Is there still a We Hate Max Club, by the way? I bet there is.
I think her greatest wish is to have Sawyer and Michael fight it out for her....but than decide to share her
Oh. Yes. Yes, my mind just ventured to a very pornographic place. Thank you for this fantastic visual.

Sara:
April.....REPAIR OUR HEARTS!!!
I have to break them a little more first!

Krista:
In a weird way, I feel like Max is smarter than Michael. Michael is the nicest guy, sweet as can be, and look what it's bringing him. He's getting the wool pulled over his eyes because he wants to see the good in someone who doesn't have a good bone in her body. I'm not sure Max would ever let himself get in that situation.
Oh, yeah, I totally agree. Michael is way too trusting and way too willing to see the good in people, whereas Max knows to see the bad in people. They're pretty much opposites. They have different ways of looking at the world, and right now, Michael's way is not benefiting him.
Maria... well, it'd be nice if Maria could stop moping around. Michael was a great guy for her, but at the end of the day, a guy is just a guy.
Yeah, even if the guy happens to be the love of your life, he doesn't define you. Maria fell really hard and really fast for Michael, and she sort of lost herself in those feelings. Now that her heart is broken, she's really struggling to pick up the pieces.
How much longer till the fic is finished so we can see Isabel get what's coming to her?
You guys are on page 1,047 of 1,316. There is a lot of intense stuff yet to come.

Christina:
Max having Liz pretend to be Isabel is so, Max. I thought it was weird how he thought of it as some kind of fun date, and she was just feeling horrible about it the whole time. They're so different, but so alike at the same time.
Yeah, definitely. They're different but the same.
Surprising, Max trying to make sure a girl doesn't get drunk. What does he mean by not wanting to hurt her? Not wanting to have her sleep with him while under the influence, the way he plotted with Maria before?
Yeah, that's exactly what he means. Luckily, even though she'd been drink, Liz wasn't drunk when she had sex with Max. She knew what she was doing. Max would've had a hard time forgiving himself if he took advantage of her. I think it's interesting that, for someone who likes having control and likes having the upper hand in everything that he does, Max often can't control himself, and he hurts people.
You're making me nervous, April.
I try my best. ;)

Jason's Lover:
April, are you the same April that posts on Fishbiscuitland and other Lost forums? Big Skate fan? If you are, this is Castaway.

And I love this story.
Hey there! New feedbacker!

I am most definitely a big Skate fan (Sawyer is "sex on a stick." I like that. 8) ) and I've posted at lost-forum a few times, but I don't think I've ever posted at Fishbiscuitland, so you're probably thinking of a different April.

I'm glad to know you're reading this story and hope to read more of your feedback!


This part again deals with something I know nothing about: paternity test results. Again, I did some research and tried to make this as accurate as possible by looking up sample paternity tests online.

Ooh, the stalking is massive today! I like it.

And as for people who want light-hearted fics . . . bid on me in the author auction and I'll write you one!
:D








Part 62







Michael was loading up his backpack with everything he would need for the day—books, lunch, work clothes—when Isabel came inside waving an envelope in her hand. She had gone downstairs to get the mail. “You’re never gonna believe this,” she said, “but we’ve got our test results.”

Michael tensed. “Already?”

“Yeah. They must’ve made us a priority since I’m so far along. Here.” She handed the envelope to him. “You get to do the honors since you’re the one paying for it.”

“Actually, I spoke to my parents about it. They’re gonna cover the cost.” Michael took a deep breath and carefully opened the sealed envelope. He took out the paternity analysis report inside, unfolded it, and read what it had to say. Michael Guerin is not excluded from being the biological father of the child tested. So that was it. Below that sentence was a lined dubbed the CPI, or Combined Parentage Index, with the number 41,411 to the right of it. The last line was Probability of Paternity, which read 99.9976%. “So . . . this just means I’m the dad?” he clarified.

“Yep.” She leaned over and took a look at the results. “Not excluded, just like I told you you’d be.”

He frowned. Not excluded? Couldn’t they give him something more definitive? As he read on, though, he realized just how definitive it was. The 41,411 CPI meant that he was 41,411 times more likely to be the biological father of the baby compared to an untested, unrelated person of the same ethnicity.

“I don’t get this,” he said when he surveyed columns of numbers that were supposed to be an interpretation of the results. There was a column for him and a column for the baby, as well as a column titled Locus. “I don’t get all these numbers.”

“Let me see,” Isabel said, taking the test from him for a moment. “Oh, it’s really simple actually. All those weird things they have under locus, like CSF1P0 . . . that’s like a genetic thing they tested. And all these numbers in the other columns are comparisons between your genetic system and the baby’s,” she explained. “See how you guys have all these numbers in common? Alex didn’t have any numbers in common with the baby. So that’s how they were able to tell he wasn’t the dad, and that’s how they’re able to tell that you are.”

Michael nodded, soaking it all in. It wasn’t some huge shock, but now there was absolutely no doubt. “Okay,” he said. “Yeah, I get it now. Good. I’m glad we got that out of the way.”

“Me, too.” She gave the test back to him and stretched her arms above her head, yawning. “Now we can just focus on this last month, and then the rest of our lives.”

The rest of our lives, he thought. Damn. “Yeah,” he said. “Hey, uh . . . I think I’m gonna go show these results to Tess. Is that okay?”

“Okay? It’s a good idea,” she said. “I really don’t want my journal stolen again.”

“Okay.” He folded up the paternity test, put it back in the envelope, and dropped the envelope into his backpack. “Then I’m gonna go to class, and then I’ve got work, so I probably won’t be back until later. Are you gonna be alright here?”

She smiled. “Yes. The pregnant lady can spend a day by herself.”

“Yeah, I know.” He slung his backpack over his shoulders and headed for the door. “Call me if you need anything.”

She stopped him when he opened the door. “Michael? You okay?”

He hadn’t been okay ever since she’d come back, but he wasn’t about to tell her that. “Yeah,” he lied. “I’m fine.” He slipped out the door, and struggled to carry his backpack down the hall. It wasn’t that heavy, but the test results weighed it down.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

When Tess opened the door and came face to face with Michael, she knew exactly why he was there. He held up a piece of paper and announced, “I’m gonna be a dad. But then again, I already knew that.”

“That’s the paternity test?” she asked for clarification. Stupid question, she thought. It said Paternity Analysis Report on the top of it. It couldn’t really be anything else.

“Take a look,” he said, handing it to her.

She looked it over sadly. Not excluded. She shook her head. “I thought for sure . . .” She folded up the test and handed it back to him, not sure if this merited a congratulations or not. “Well, it’s good you had this done, and now you know it for a fact.”

“Now you know,” he corrected. “Aren’t you even gonna admit you were wrong?”

She shrugged. “I was wrong.” She didn’t regret trying, though.

“But you were hoping you were right.”

“Of course. You’re not gonna be happy with her, Michael.”

“I’m not with her,” he denied.

Yes, you are.”

“Not like that.”

She shook her head. It didn’t matter. It didn’t matter if they were affectionate or romantic or sexual together. He was going to be with her in some respect for the rest of his life because of the son they were having together, and that limited his possibilities for happiness.

“I’m not having this conversation again,” he decided, stuffing the test results into his backpack. “I gotta get to class.”

He headed down the hallway, and she thought about letting him go. But she couldn’t, because there was something she had to ask him. “Michael, wait,” she said, following him out into the hall. “What were you hoping for?”

He turned around slowly, glaring at her. “What do you mean?”

“The test,” she elaborated. “Did you want it to come back positive or negative?”

He flapped his arms against his sides and avoided answering. “What does it matter?”

“It matters.”

He sighed heavily and took a few steps towards her. “I wanted it to come back positive, because that would mean she wasn’t lying to me.”

She sensed a ‘but’ coming.

“But . . .”

And there it was. She was surprised he was even willing to talk to her about this after the falling out they’d had.

“This is awful,” he said, swallowing hard. “I wanted it to come back negative, because then I’d have a way out. I’d get to be with Maria, nothing standin’ in the way.” He shrugged. “That’s all I really want. But I know it’s really selfish.”

“There’s nothing wrong with being selfish,” she assured him, feeling her heart go out to him. He was a good guy. He really deserved to be happy, and he’d been so sad lately. “She misses you,” she informed him. Maria was sad, too.

“I miss her,” he admitted.

“Then maybe if you guys just--”

“Tess, don’t . . .” he cut in. “Just don’t give me false hope, okay? I can’t afford that.”

She sighed shakily. “Okay. I’m gonna hope, though, if you don’t mind.”

“I don’t mind.” He tried to smile and then turned around to leave again.

“Michael?” Tess ran after him and threw her arms around his midsection, hugging him. “I’m sorry,” she apologized tearfully. “I never meant to upset you. I was just trying to help. I went about it in the wrong way, and I probably did more harm than good. I’m so sorry.”

He was reluctant to hug her back at first, but not for long. “It’s okay,” he told her.

“No, it’s not.” She released him from the hug and looked up at him. “I hate fighting with you. It just feels wrong. So please, let’s not fight anymore. I can’t take it when you’re mad at me.”

“Yeah, I can’t . . . I can’t take that, either,” he said. “I’m sorry, too. I know I said some pretty hurtful things. I didn’t mean any of ‘em.”

“It’s okay.”

“No, it’s not.” They both laughed lightly at their own mimicking. “Alright, as far as I’m concerned, we’re fine,” he told her.

“Still friends?”

“Still friends.”

“Oh, thank God.” Tess lowered her head and tried to hold in the tears, but a choked sob shook her body, and she started to cry.

“Oh, no, Tess, don’t cry,” he said. “Why are you crying?”

“Because, I just feel like I’ve lost so many people this year,” she whimpered, wiping the tears from her cheeks. “Maria, for awhile, then Max, and then Kyle.” She tried to sniff back the remainder of her tears, but they just kept coming. “And I couldn’t bear the thought of losing you, too.”

“You didn’t lose me,” he reassured her. “You got Maria back, and losing Max was a good thing. And you’ll never lose Kyle. You’ll always have a part of him, just like Maria will always have a part of me.”

She shook her head, still sobbing. “But it’ll never be the same.” Parts of Kyle weren’t as good as the whole thing.

“You and Kyle still stand a chance,” he said.

“You think so?”

“Everyone thinks so. Except for . . . you and Kyle.”

She laughed a little and hugged him again. “I love you, Michael,” she told him. “Not in a sexy way.”

He chuckled lightly along with her and patted her back encouragingly. “Yeah, I didn’t think so,” he said. “But thanks.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Liz groaned and rubbed her forehead. Her body was telling her it was time to wake up already, but she was exhausted. She felt like she’d just gone to sleep.

Probably because she had.

She slowly opened her eyes as recollection of last night came back to her. The party had kind of all blurred together by now, but there was nothing blurry about the after-party with Max. Her hair was still damp and matted from the shower.

She rolled over onto her back and took a look at Max sprawled out beside her. There were scratch marks on his chest.

“Oh, crap,” she grumbled. She’d let it happen again.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“Liz, wait.”

Liz scurried away from the private jet towards the limo. She didn’t appear to be waiting for anyone, but Max sure as hell wasn’t going to let her off that easy.

“Hold up.”

She just kept walking.

“Come on, I know you like to run away from your problems,” he said as he followed after her, “but this is ridiculous.” She had locked herself in the plane’s master bathroom and had refused to say one word to him on the flight back.

She whirled around to face him, her eyes blazing with fury. “What did you say?”

His hands ached with the desire to grab onto her. “You look so hot when you’re pissed.”

“Ugh.” She rolled her eyes in disgust and continued her march towards the car.

“What? I’m being serious,” he insisted. He ran in front of her, blocking her forward progress.

“Move,” she told him.

“We have to talk about last night.”

“No, we don’t.”

He sighed heavily. “Okay, I should’ve expected this. This is what you do after we fuck—deny, deny—and pretty soon your ass is in the air. And I’m rammin’ it.” He shrugged. That was the way the world worked.

She glared at him. “Last night was a mistake, Max.”

He grinned. “Three mistakes, but who’s counting?”

She threw her hands in the air and growled angrily. “Oh, you see, this is why we’ll never work, because you’re always saying something or doing something that pisses me off.”

“Or makes you hot,” he suggested.

“Like that! God!”

“Am I God now?” He laughed at his own joke.

“Oh, seriously, Max, do you have any idea how annoying you are?”

“Hey, at least I’m not the one sending mixed signals. But here’s the thing, Liz . . .” He moved in closer to her and stroked her hair. He loved that hair. It bounced when he screwed her. “Actions always speak louder than words. And if we take a look at your actions last night versus your words right now . . . I think you see what I’m getting at here.”

“Mistakes,” she persisted.

“Revelations,” he was quick to correct. “That’s what they were. Every kiss, every touch, every dirty little word you whispered . . . was trying to tell you something. We’re meant to be together.”

She narrowed her eyes skeptically. “Like soul mates?”

He shrugged. “Assuming I have a soul, which—guess what—I do.”

“I’m not so sure.”

“Liz . . .”

“Max.” She backed away from him and shook her head. It was as though she were saying she couldn’t do this again, even though she wanted to. He knew she wanted him, and he wanted her.

She walked around him and climbed into the limo. He swallowed his pride for a moment and signaled for the limo driver to take her back to her hotel room. He could ride in a taxi if he had to.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tess was studying for her last midterm before spring break when a loud, insistent knocking on her door interrupted her. Whoever was on the other side wasn’t even giving her time to get to the door before knocking again. “Alright, I’m coming. My god.” She unlocked the door, and as she opened it, the person on the other side pushed it open, hitting her in the face. “Ow!” she yelped, holding her hand over her eye.

“Oh, god, Tess,” Liz said. “I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, right,” Tess said, confused as to what the hell Liz was doing there. “You probably did that on purpose.”

“Just a little,” Liz acknowledged, strolling into the apartment without an invite. “Can we talk?”

Tess rubbed her eye, hoping and praying it wasn’t going to swell or turn black or blue or anything. “So you heard about the paternity test?”

Liz frowned. “No, what about it?”

“Oh. Michael’s the dad. We were wrong. We stole Isabel’s journal for nothing, made ourselves look like conniving bitches for nothing. Well, actually, that’s your default setting, so . . .”

“That sucks,” Liz said. “I mean, that sucks for him and Maria.” She sighed. “So I guess our little investigation’s over, huh?”

“Pretty much.” There wasn’t anything they could do now. “The girl can manipulate a lot of things, but she can’t manipulate DNA.”

“Does Maria know?”

Tess glanced down the hallway at the closed door to Maria’s bedroom. “I told her,” she said. “She’s asleep right now.” Maria had basically had no reaction to the paternity test results, which freaked Tess out. Maria was crazy emotional, so seeing her so void of all emotion . . . creepy.

“Poor thing,” Liz said sympathetically before completely changing the subject. “So I’m kind of having guy drama.”

Tess sat down in her recliner and kicked her feet up. “Okay, first off, there was, like, no segue there. Second, I am not your friend, so don’t come to me with ‘guy drama.’”

“Why not? You came to me with the Isabel stuff,” Liz pointed out. “And I don’t have any friends. You don’t know what that’s like, because you have Maria. I have no one, and I need someone to talk to.”

Tess rolled her eyes. She had a feeling she knew what this was about. “Max?”

“How’d you know?”

She shrugged. “Because you’re you. You had sex with him again, didn’t you?”

Liz looked at her in disbelief. “How--”

“Because you’re you, Liz.”

Liz ran one hand through her hair and admitted, “Yeah, it kind of just happened, and now I don’t know what to do.” Liz flopped down on the couch, looking distressed. “I’m sorry,” she said, “I know this is a weird conversation for us to be having. You’re not still into him, are you?”

“I was never into him,” Tess informed her. “But you are, and even though it’s not a healthy relationship, it’s clearly what you want, so just go for it, and prepare to get hurt.”

Liz frowned, looking nervous. All of a sudden, she sat straight up on the couch and asked, “Can I move in here for awhile?”

“What?” Tess shrieked. “No!”

“Why not?”

“Because I don’t like you. Besides, I already have a roommate, my best friend.”

“I’ll sleep on the couch,” Liz volunteered. “Please, just don’t make me go back to that dingy motel room. He’ll find me there.”

“Oh my god, are you hiding out from him?”

“Just for a couple days.”

Tess rolled her eyes. How ridiculous. “Kyle and I were drunk when we slept together for the first time, and we still managed to confront each other about it.”

“Yeah, well, in case you haven’t noticed, Max and I are not you and Kyle. Please, Tess,” Liz begged. “A week, tops. That’s all I’m asking. I’m apartment hunting tomorrow. I’ll be out of your hair in no time.”

Tess didn’t know why she was even considering it. She had no reason to. But she reminded herself that she had once been Max’s leading lady. It wasn’t an easy thing to be. “Fine, I’ll run it by Maria,” she resigned. “I’m sure she won’t care.”

“Oh, thank you so much!” Liz squealed, springing to her feet.

“Just don’t get too comfy,” Tess warned. “This isn’t Hotel Harding, you know.”

“Tess, I am so indebted to you. I promise, I’ll never steal your boyfriend again.

Tess half-cringed/half-smiled. “Gee, thanks.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Michael pushed open the door to the bedroom and peeked his head inside that night. “You still awake?” he asked Isabel.

She smiled at him through the darkness. “If I wasn’t before, I am now.”

“Sorry,” he apologized. “I just wanted to say goodnight. So . . . goodnight.” He started to shut the door, but she stopped him.

“Michael.” She pushed herself up into a sitting position and asked, “Will you come sit with me?”

He stared at her for a moment, and he let himself flash back to memories of seeing Maria in that bed, sometimes asleep, sometimes awake, usually unclothed. Maria . . .

“Sure.” He crept through the dark bedroom, stubbed his toe on the edge of the bed, and cringed before getting into bed with her. He sat beside her, slightly uncomfortable, and pulled the covers up over his lap. He was still going to sleep on the couch.

“I know you wanted the test to come back negative,” she said.

He opened his mouth to protest, even though it was partially true.

“And that’s fine,” she added before he could even get a word out. “You don’t have to feel ashamed for not wanting your life to change. I mean, when I took the pregnancy test, I wasn’t exactly thrilled to see two pink lines.” She reached over and placed one of her hands atop his, assuring him, “You don’t have to be perfect. You can be scared and angry and sad; and that’s okay.”

He licked his lips and tried to think of a way to say what he was feeling without coming off as insensitive. “It’s not that I don’t wanna be a father,” he said. “I’ve always wanted that. It’s just . . . I didn’t think it would happen at this point in my life, and I didn’t think it’d happen . . .” He trailed off.

“With me?” she filled in.

“No, actually, for two years, I envisioned myself marrying you and having lots of kids with you, and growing old with you. Preferably in that order.” He shrugged. “But then . . .”

She hung her head. “I cheated.”

He nodded. “Yeah.” There was no denying that fact. “And I moved on. Maria wasn’t a rebound. I fell in love with her. I still love her. I probably always will.” He had a hard time picturing his feelings for Maria ever just disappearing.

“I guess that’s what worries me,” Isabel said, withdrawing her hand from his. “You can love her; that’s fine. And you don’t have to love me. But I need you to be devoted to our son first and foremost.”

“I will be,” he promised. “I am.”

“I know you and Tess patched things up today, and I’m glad about that. Really, I am,” she insisted. “But if you’re able to take her back so easily, then you’ll be able to take Maria back. And where does that leave me? Where does that leave our baby?”

He scratched his eyebrow, perplexed as to how his simply coming in to say goodnight had turned into this serious conversation. “Okay, first off, mending my friendship with Tess is a lot easier than mending my relationship with Maria. Second, I don’t even know if Maria and I will ever be together again. At this point, I really doubt it. We’ve drifted pretty far apart already.” He already felt as though he were a stranger in her life again.

“But if she came to you and said, ‘Oh, by the way, Michael, I thought about it, and I wanna be with you, even if you are having a baby with someone else,’ . . . would you go for it?” Isabel asked. “Would you be with her again?”

He knew the answer. He knew it right away. “In a heartbeat.” He knew it wasn’t what Isabel wanted to hear, but he had to be honest. “That’s not gonna happen, but even if it did, I’d still be there for you and there for our son. He’s gonna have me in his life for his whole life, no exceptions. And I’m gonna be the best father I can possibly be, no matter what.”

Isabel smiled a small smile and reached up to stroke his cheek. “Good,” she said. “That’s what I needed to hear.”

He breathed a sigh of relief. Every once in awhile, a guy could say something right.

She lowered her hand and set it down atop his again. “You know,” she said, “you really are perfect.”

Funny, he thought, because lately, he felt about as imperfect as one person could feel.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria trudged into the kitchen in the middle of the night and opened up the refrigerator. All she wanted was some rosy applesauce, and she and Tess didn’t have any. She frowned, wrote it on the grocery list, and settled for a cookie instead. Chocolate chip.

She wasn’t tired, so she decided to flip on the TV and watch some of those great late-night infomercials. She made her way into the dark living room, felt around for the remote, and turned on the TV as she sat down on the couch. It wasn’t the couch she ended up sitting down upon, though.

“Ow!” a voice yelped.

“Oh my god!” Maria gasped and shot to her feet. The light from the TV shown upon the body on the couch, and for a second, Maria thought she was seeing things. “Liz?”

“Hey, Maria,” Liz said sleepily.

Maria glanced around, utterly confused. “What’re you doing here?”

“Crashing,” Liz mumbled. “Just for a couple days. Tess said it was okay.”

Maria grunted. She supposed Tess had final say on all the apartment matters. It was technically hers since she’d paid all the rent for the past . . . ever. “I thought you were staying in a hotel,” she said.

“I was, but I’m too findable there.” Liz sat up and yawned.

Maria shook her head, set the remote down on the coffee table, and headed for the bedroom. “I don’t even wanna know.”

“Maria, wait,” Liz called after her.

Maria slowed her pace and turned around impatiently. First no rosy applesauce and now a Liz encounter? What a crappy night.

“I’m sorry about what Max did to you,” Liz said. “And I’m sorry for loving him, even after finding out about it.”

Maria rolled her eyes. “Whatever.” She didn’t want to rehash the past.

“He and I may be getting involved again,” Liz told her, “and I just wanted you to know. It kinda scares me.”

“Well, it should.” Max was a scary guy. “Whatever, it’s your life.”

“Yeah,” Liz agreed, pulling her legs up to her chest. “It’s just . . . hard.”

Maria tilted her head inquisitively. “Hard, huh?”

“Sorry, wrong choice of words. Difficult,” Liz clarified. “It’s . . . difficult because, if I screw up, which I usually do, I don’t have anyone in my corner. You have all these friends and family members who are like friends. I don’t.”

Maria crossed her arms over her chest and walked back out into the living room. “You did,” she reminded her coldly.

“But now I just have Max.”

Maria shrugged, unable to feel sorry for her. “Too bad. In high school, you had Kyle. For a long time here, you had me. I would’ve stuck by you no matter what.”

“Except you didn’t,” Liz pointed out. “I mean, how many times did I hear you say that Tess would always win out over me? You were never my friend like you are hers.”

“Well, I would’ve stuck by you through almost anything.”

“Except Max.”

“This actually isn’t about him, Liz. It’s about you,” Maria informed her. “You chose to be this person who nobody likes. So if you have no friends out there in the big, bad world, whose fault is that? It’s not mine.”

Liz nodded slowly in agreement. “You’re right,” she said. “It is my fault. I’m not blaming anyone else.”

“But that’s what you always do. You blame Max, mostly. I’m not saying he doesn’t deserve it, but he didn’t force you to do the things you did. You messed up all on your own. So if you made a mistake and your life sucks because of it, that’s just something you’re gonna have to live with.” Maria glared at her, sort of . . . hating her in that moment. It felt good to hate. It was simple.

“Are we talking about me,” Liz asked, “or you?”

Maria tensed, alarmed. She’d been trying to talk about Liz, but she could see how what she’d said would apply to herself, too. “I’m sorry for sitting on you,” she apologized unemotionally. “Find an apartment.” She picked up the remote control and practically threw it down on Liz’s lap before turning and heading back down the hallway to her bedroom. Liz could watch TV by herself, or fall back asleep on the couch. Maria didn’t want anything to do with her. Her life was screwed up enough already. She wouldn’t care if Liz left town again and never came back.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“You’re leaving?” Maria couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

“Yeah.” Marty averted all eye contact with her as he began loading his pornography collection into a cardboard box.

“Already?”

“Please don’t hate me.”

“No, I don’t . . .” Maria glanced around her brother’s half-empty apartment. When Marty had called her that morning and asked her to come over, she had assumed that he wanted to go out for brunch or something, or maybe take another trip to the mall. She hadn’t imagined he would tell her he was leaving. “I don’t hate you,” she assured him. “It’s just so soon. It seems like just yesterday you were talking about it, and now you’re doing it.”

“I know.” Marty looked nervous about the prospect, but also excited. “I feel like such a bitch for leaving, but I have to. There’s this house that Francis and I love more than life itself, but if we don’t hop to it, they’re gonna rent it out to someone else. Plus, Francis got a great job offer . . .” He shrugged helplessly. “I just wish Massachusetts wasn’t so damn far away from here.”

“Me, too.” Maria wrapped her arms around herself, fearing the idea of her brother not being there for her. Talking to him on the phone and online and text messaging . . . it wasn’t going to be the same. “I don’t know what I’m gonna do without you here,” she admitted. “You’re, like, the one person who can always make me feel better.”

“Oh.” He started to get teary-eyed. “Keep talking like that and you might convince me to stay.”

“No.” That wasn’t what she wanted. She didn’t want to hold him back. She wanted him to live his life so that at least one of them was living. “If you wanna go, you should go. Don’t stay on my account.”

“But you’re my little sis.”

“And you’re my big brother, and I want you to be happy.” It absolutely killed her to say it, but she knew she had to. She didn’t have it in her to try to guilt-trip him into staying, no matter how badly she really didn’t want him to leave her. “Just promise me you’ll have a big, fancy wedding, one with a delicious cake and a choreographed wedding dance.”

“Oh, I promise,” Marty assured her. “Francis and I are already learning the moves to ‘It’s Gonna Be Me.’”

Maria laughed lightly. “NSYNC?”

“Hell, yeah. I’m still holding out hope that Lance isn’t the only gay one.”

She laughed again. This is what she was going to miss the most, Marty’s humor. He was always able to make her laugh, even when she was sad. “So when are you leaving?” she asked.

“Uh . . . tomorrow morning.”

“Tomorrow morning?” That was even sooner than she’d thought.

“Yeah. I’ve got a lot of packing to do today, huh?” He sighed heavily. “Wanna help?”

“Of course.” She wasn’t all that enthused about packing, but any chance she got to spend some quality time with her brother before he left was a chance she was going to jump on. “Can we just spend this last day together, just you and me? Just like we did when we were little kids?”

Marty smiled at her. “I wouldn’t spend my last day here any other way.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Michael was surprised to find Isabel packing a bag when he got back from class that morning. She seemed pretty intent on it, didn’t even notice him standing in the doorway. “Going somewhere?” he asked.

“Uh, yeah, actually. There’s this killer party in Venezuela. I can’t miss it.”

He frowned.

She laughed and teased, “She joked.”

“Right.” Again, he looked at the bulging bag. “So where are you going?”

“Nowhere yet, but I could be soon,” she replied. “Any day now I could head into the hospital for the torturous process known as giving birth.”

“Yeah, thinkin’ about that makes me kind of glad to be a guy.”

“Guys always have it easier,” she grumbled. “Hey, did you know that sex can help induce labor?”

“Is that really true?”

She shrugged. “I knew this girl named Katie in Florida. Her water broke while her boyfriend was . . . well, you know.”

“Sexy.”

“Well, whatever works.” She folded up a sweatshirt and placed it in the already-full bag. “Don’t worry, I’m not insinuating that we should . . .” She trailed off and moved her hands in a circle. “Unless you want to.”

He was grateful that his phone rang out at exactly that moment, because he really didn’t want to respond to that. “I gotta . . .” He took his phone out of his pocket and headed out into the living room. “Hello?”

“Hey, Big Boy!”

Even if that voice hadn’t been the most recognizable voice in the world, he knew exactly who it was. No one else called him Big Boy. “Hey, Marty,” he said. “What’s up? I haven’t heard from you for awhile.”

“I know, I’m ashamed of myself,” he admitted. “But I, uh . . . I heard you’ve got some stuff goin’ on.”

“Yeah.” Michael craned his neck back to look in at Isabel again. “Some stuff. What about you?”

“Same,” Marty replied. “Well, not a pregnant girlfriend, obviously. So I guess it’s not really the same. I’m actually moving to Massachusetts. With Francis. We hear wedding bells, so . . .”

“Oh, yeah? Well, that’s great. I’m happy for you.”

“Thanks,” Marty said. “Here’s the thing: I’m leaving soon. As in very. As in tomorrow.”

“Wow, that’s . . .”

“Yeah. And I’d really like to say goodbye to you and your impressively large package before I go.”

Michael chuckled. Only a guy like Marty could get by saying that to him. “Well, I don’t know about my package, but you can say goodbye to me if you want.”

“Great,” Marty chirped. “Is it too much of an inconvenience to ask you to come by my apartment? I’d stop by your place, but I have all this annoying packing to do. Besides, I don’t think Bitchabel’s a fan of Party Marty.”

Michael laughed again. “That’s fine. I can stop by, uh . . . now, actually, if that works for you.”

“Perfection!” Marty exclaimed.

“You want me to bring Kyle?” Michael offered. He doubted his friend had any exciting, unchangeable plans for the day.

“No, just yourself,” Marty said. “I’ll say goodbye to him later. You remember how to get here?”

“Yeah.”

“Alright. See you soon, Hot Stuff.”

Michael shook his head and closed his phone. That guy was crazy. But he was actually going to miss him.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“Hey, there you are. You really hauled ass,” Marty remarked as Michael strolled into his apartment. He tilted his head to the side and examined Michael’s backside. “Sexy ass.”

“Let it go, Marty,” Michael told him, taking it all in stride.

“Okay.” Marty approached him and placed his hands on his shoulders. “Hey, in all seriousness,” he said, “you’ve been really good for my sister. She’s grown, like, miles with you. Like miles. But she’s still Maria, too, which is nice. Anyway, I know everything’s crazy and up in the air right now, but you gotta promise me that you’ll look out for her, even if you’re not with her. Promise?”

Michael opened his mouth to speak, but before he could, the girl in question came out of the bedroom into the living room, carrying a box. “Michael?” She dropped the box and stared at him in disbelief as though she couldn’t fathom that they were standing in the same room together. Hell, he could barely fathom it. It hardly happened anymore.

“Promise,” Marty whispered.

“What?” Michael hardly even knew what was going on.

“Promise.”

“I promise.” He looked over at Maria again. “What . . .?”

“What’re you doing here?” Maria asked him, bristling.

“Be carfeul,” Marty said, bending to retrieve the box she’d dropped. “These are my sex toys in here.”

“Marty, what’s--”

“It’s my last-minute matchmaking attempt,” he explained. “How could I not?” He shrugged innocently. “You two seriously need to talk. And I really did need help packing, and I really did wanna say goodbye. So . . .” He turned back to Michael, set the sex toys box down on the arm of the couch, and threw his arms around him, hugging him rather ferociously. “Ooh, this feels nice!” he exclaimed.

Michael laughed and locked eyes with Maria over her brother’s shoulder. She didn’t exactly look thrilled to see him.

Marty released him from the hug and said, “Here’s hopin’ I see you soon, Michael.”

Michael frowned. “Did you just call me--”

“Big Boy.” Marty winked at him, picked up his box of sex toys, and gave him a back-handed spank on the butt before prancing out the door.

“Well,” Michael said, “that was bracing.” He stuffed his hands in his pockets and took a moment to adjust to the awkwardness of himself and Maria being alone in that apartment. She wasn’t saying anything, so he took the initiative and asked, “How you doin’?”

“Loaded question,” she replied.

“Yeah, I know what you mean. Isabel and I had a paternity test—I’m assuming Tess told you about that. And it came back positive, of course, so now it’s all about getting her through this last month and getting myself ready to be a dad.”

Maria didn’t say anything.

“You know, I was thinking about it on the drive over here and I realized, I don’t even know if we have baby clothes for him. How messed up is that?”

“I really can’t hear this right now,” Maria told him flat-out.

He’d made the mistake of telling her too much. The last thing she probably wanted to hear about was him and Isabel and the baby. “Sorry,” he apologized sincerely.

“Look, Michael, I know you and Tess were able to work through your drama yesterday and stay friends, but that’s not gonna happen for us,” she said. “We can’t just be friends anymore.”

“I know.”

“So . . . let’s just spare ourselves the heartache and not even pretend, okay?” she suggested. “Too much has happened and too much has changed. I think it’s best if we just keep our distance from each other and don’t interfere in each other’s lives.”

Hearing her say that hurt his heart. This girl standing in front of him . . . she wasn’t his girl. She wasn’t his Maria. His Maria was full of life and energy and spontaneity. He felt like he’d damaged her, and that had never been his intention.

“Good luck with your baby, and with your life with Isabel,” she told him, sounding on the verge of tears.

“I’m not--”

“I really hope it works out for you,” she said, backing away from him. “I really do.” She turned and headed into the bedroom just as she was starting to cry. She slammed the door shut, and he stood in Marty’s virtually empty living room and sighed. He wanted his Maria back.








TBC . . .

-April
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LOVE IS MICHAEL AND MARIA.
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April
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Part 63

Post by April »

Alison:
April seriously, I'm hanging on by a thread here, how long till it starts to pick up? How long till something massive happens and we get the ball rolling again?
Actually, I think this part is going to get the ball rolling again for at least some of the characters.
I'm aching for Isabel to get her comeuppance... tell me it happens!
:lol: I don't know, you'll have to wait and see if her uppance will come.

Leila:
This is my favourite description about Liz' hair in a fic. In the usual dreamer fics you read how obsessed Max is with her hair because of the colour, smoothness etc. Buuuuut this is the best reason for Max Evans loving Liz hair.
Raunchy reasons are usually the best reasons. ;)
I'm gonny miss Marty. he was my faourite gay in that fic beside Max(ine)-the she male.
I love how you're still holding onto Maxine the shemale. :lol:

Sara: I love how you keep telling me I suck, yet it comes off as complimentary! :lol:
I want something good to happen, Tess and Michael reconciling was a good beginning.
For sure. Michael needs his friends and needs their support right now. Hopefully they can keep him from getting sucked even farther into Isabel's web.

Eva:
First that test, now Maria's harsh reaction. Can it get any worse??
Or, and I almost don't dare asking it, is this the last stone you dropped on my fragile M&M heart?
Well . . . I might have a few more stones to drop. :(

Krista:
April, I would totally try to outbid anyone to win you in the Support Stacie auction if I wasn't completely broke.
Yeah, I'm broke, too. That's why I'm putting myself up as an author. Figured I could take part in that capacity.
Maybe now that Michael wants his Maria back, he'll bring her back.
Might be easier said than done.

Ooh, Krista, you're getting in on the stalking, I see. Nice!

nibbles:
Knowing that very soon, Isabel is going to have to go through (what I hope is a long and painful) childbirth is just about the only thing that gets me through these parts. Oh, the thought of her in all that pain. It makes me so happy.
:lol: Isabel is going to hate giving birth!
Liz just wants the girls she hurt to tell her she's not a bad person.
Liz would love for someone to tell her that. Anyone. But particularly the girls Max hurt the most.

In addition to that, I think Liz is really envious of the friendship that Maria and Tess have. She sees how close they are, and she wants to be a part of it; but because of the choices she's made with her life, she's never going to be a part of it.

Nove:
Best part of this part for me has to have been when Liz ask Tess if she could stay with her. I would have never seen that coming. It blew me away. I love that, you are able to do that still after all this time. The audacity of the question just amazed me and then weirdest reply of yes. Wow! They have a crazy I don't even know what to call their interaction.
Liz and Tess are kind of fun to write in this fic, because they have this very strange dynamic where . . . they're not friends, and they're probably never going to be friends, but they've managed to tolerate each other.

Monica:
I can't beleive Max. Is he even trying to better himself? I know he's honest but he can atleast try to be a better man.
Max has made some changes, for the better, but at the end of the day, he's still Max. He's still an ass.

killjoy:
APRIL!!!!.....I love you and all but I swear if you don't throw some K/T stuff in here soon I'm going to bang my head against my computer desk
Ha, ha, ha, it's funny you say that, because this part is almost entirely devoted to Kyle and Tess.

spacegirl23:
I didn't expect Maria and Michael to be like this. After the 'cold shower' incident, I was totally for them breaking up, so they could find their way back to each other and be stronger for it. But not this. They're drifting further apart and pushing each other away.
I know, you kept saying you were glad they broke up, but I kept thinking to myself, 'I wonder how long she's going to be glad.'

tequathisy:
Part of me wants Maria to pack up and go with Marty and to get away from the misery of having to see Michael play house with her.
Part of Maria wants that, too.
Tess is way too nice. Way too nice. I would have told Liz to take a long walk off a short cliff.
:lol: I think I may have, too!

Sarah: Oh, lord. Good old Maury. You are not the father. Michael would never be insensitive enough to do the you-are-not-the-father dance, though.



Lyrics included in this part are to "Adia" by Sarah McLachlan. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QDU8U6X4QyA&fmt=18 You've probably all heard this song before. It's a classic. I guess Adia is a name and it means "child of God" or "delivered from God" or something. I don't know, exactly, but I love the song.


Remember how we had that part a couple days ago that was almost all about Max and Liz? Well, this one is almost all about Kyle and Tess. Long overdue, huh?









Part 63








Liz strolled along downtown, searching for the Highland View apartment complex. She’d MapQuested the directions, but those directions had led her to the wrong apartments. She had been wandering aimlessly for the past twenty minutes, worried that she was going to be late to the apartment showing.

Her face was practically buried in her MapQuest directions when she accidently walked into a man in front of her. “Oh, sorry,” she said, immediately regretting that apology when she looked up and saw Max in front of her, smirking at her.

“Look who finally got out of the Budget Inn,” he remarked. “Good for you, Liz.”

“How’d you know I left the Budget?” she inquired.

“I dropped by this morning, and the crack-whore at the front desk said you checked out yesterday,” he explained. “Where you stayin’ now?”

“None of your business.”

“With Kyle?”

She made a face. “No.”

“Then where?” he asked, thinking about it for a moment. “My god, with Tess?”

How did he know?

“Nice. You can swap sex stories. She’ll give me a 6.5 out of ten, but you know I'm an eleven.”

“Are you following me now?” she asked. “Because, you know, being stalked is actually a turn-off.”

“I know,” he said. “I’m not stalking you. I’ve got a guy who I paid to follow you.”

She didn’t know whether to believe him or not. “You didn’t.”

“No, I didn’t. Or did I?” He grinned slyly, and she rolled her eyes. “No, I don’t. Seriously,” he promised. “I just saw you wandering around out here, told my driver to pull over so I could hop out and talk to you.”

She crossed her arms over her chest. “About what?”

“What do you think?”

Sex. Sex, sex, sex. “No.” If he wanted to offer her directions to the Highland View apartments, then they could talk.

“You can’t just sweep this under the rug, Liz.”

“Watch me.” She tried to walk past him, but he grabbed her arm and pulled her back to him. “Let go of me,” she growled.

“Or what?” he taunted.

“I’ll scream.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time.” He gradually let go of her arm and backed away from her. He gazed at her for a moment, right into her eyes, and then he said something that shocked her: “I love you.” It was a simple way to declare it, but it wasn’t a simple thing. She had never heard him say that word before, not to her, not to anyone. She doubted it had ever crossed his lying lips once in his entire life.

“You don’t have to believe me,” he said as he backed on down the sidewalk, “but it’s true.”

She let out a deep, shaky breath, watching him turn and walk away from her. She didn’t know whether she believed him or not, but she wanted to. She really wanted to.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“Baby clothes, baby food, baby monitors, baby toys . . . don’t worry, I’ve got it covered,” Isabel assured Michael that evening. “Just ask Tess. She likes to snoop through my stuff. She could tell you.” She popped a forkful of pasta into her mouth and said, “Sorry, cheap shot.”

“No, that’s . . .” Michael kicked his feet up onto the coffee table and tried to relax, but it still felt weird to even sit next to her on the couch like this. “So you really already have all that stuff?”

“Hello, baby showers do exist in Florida, you know, and I had two of them. So I was showered with baby supplies twice. Trust me, we’re ready.”

Still, Michael couldn’t breathe a sigh of relief just yet. “Well, you are.”

“Michael.” Isabel gave him a look. “You’re gonna be a great father. You have nothing to worry about.”

“Yeah, thanks for saying that.”

“It’s true.” She set her pasta bowl aside and turned to face him. “You know, I had a whole life set up in Florida,” she said. “Friends, boyfriend . . . I was even thinking about enrolling at the university.”

“Huh.” He nodded, trying to picture that. “You know UM is, like, one of the biggest party schools in the nation, don’t you?”

“Why do you think I wanted to go there?” She grinned. “But then things changed. I found out I was pregnant, and college suddenly wasn’t a priority anymore. And then I found out it was your baby and . . . well, I had to say goodbye to my friends and to Alex so that I could come back here and do the right thing. I had to start my whole life over again in the exact same city I left seven and a half months earlier.”

He shifted uncomfortably. Why was she telling him this? It still made him uneasy hearing her talk about Florida and Alex and . . . Alex, mostly.

“My point is, sometimes your life takes an alternate route,” she concluded. “And it’s scary because you can’t always see what lies ahead of you, but that doesn’t mean it can’t still be a wonderful life. You know what I mean?”

He couldn’t see anything that was in front of him. Fatherhood, sure, but he didn’t know what fatherhood entailed. Not really. “I’m trying to,” he said. He was really trying to understand what she meant. But for some reason, he couldn’t. He just couldn’t. His life felt anything but wonderful, and even though it was self-pitying to feel that way, he couldn’t help it.

A knock on the door broke him out of his thoughts. “Who do you think that is?” he said as he rose to his feet and went to answer it.

“Ten bucks says it’s Kyle,” Isabel wagered.

He opened the door and, just as she had thought, it was Kyle on the other side.

“Oh, I’m good,” she bragged.

Michael reached into his pocket for money and said, “I’ve only got a five.”

“Hey, I’ll take that.”

He smiled and tossed the five dollar bill at her. It landed by her feet. “Hey, man,” he said to Kyle.

“Hey,” Kyle returned. “Am I . . . interrupting something?”

“No. What’s up?”

“Nothin’, nothin’,” Kyle said. “I just . . . can I talk to you about something?”

“Sure.”

Kyle motioned with his head for Michael to come join him in his apartment. He mouthed ‘I’ll be back’ to Isabel and followed Kyle into 522. “What’s up?” he asked again. The dog came up and started pawing at his leg, so he bent down to pet him. “Hey, Frank,” he said, scratching him behind the ears.

“Do it again, Frank,” Kyle said to the dog. “Do it again.”

“Do what?” Michael asked.

“Shh.” Kyle knelt down next to Frank and stared at him intently.

“What, did you teach him to roll over or something?” Michael asked.

“I didn’t teach him anything. He spoke.”

“What?” Michael started to laugh.

“Dude, I’m not kidding. He spoke,” Kyle insisted. “Say it again, Frank.”

Frank tipped over on his side and rolled over onto his back, kicking his legs in the air.

Kyle rolled his eyes and stood back up. “Well, of course he’s not gonna say anything now. But it wasn’t five minutes ago that I was in the bathroom—I’d just eaten one of those microwavable tacos and . . .” He trailed off and shook his head. “Well, anyway, I was in the bathroom, and Frank comes in, tries to lick my leg. I’m like, ‘Frank, I’m . . . really in the middle of something here. Could you just . . .’ And I push him back, gently, of course, and he makes this sound. And at first I thought he was just whining, but then I heard it clear as day. Do you know what he said to me?”

“You’re crazy?” Michael guessed.

“Close. No it was . . . Tess. That’s what he said. Just like that, he goes . . . Tess. He said her name, man. My dog said her name.”

“Oh, did he?” Michael burst into laughter again. Kyle could be so ridiculous.

“Yeah, why’re you . . . don’t laugh. I heard what I heard, man.”

“I’m sure you did.” Michael sat down on the floor and rubbed the pug’s belly. “Frank, you’re one smart pooch.”

“It’s not just him.” Kyle knelt down beside him and kept on with his insanity. “The other day, there was, like, flock of birds circling around me, and I swear one of them squawked out her name. Or—it was more of a caw actually. Like, caw, only . . . Tess.

“Oh my god.” Michael chuckled and shook his head.

“Don’t you get it? It’s the world trying to tell me through animals that I need to call Tess again.”

“Or maybe even go see her, spend some time with her.”

Kyle’s face lit up. “Say, now there’s an idea.”

“Yeah. Yeah, there’s an idea. But it’s not my idea. It’s Frank’s idea,” Michael teased. “I’m sure God Himself just descended from the heavens and possessed this pug just so he could . . . get the word out.” He laughed some more, feeling the laughter coming from all the way down in the pit of his stomach. Damn, that felt good. “Oh, thanks for telling me about this, man,” he said. “I needed a good laugh.”

“Alright, so I was just hearing what I wanted to hear,” Kyle admitted, sitting down as well. “I don’t know how you’re doing it, man, bein’ apart from Maria. You two had the whole true love thing goin’ on.”

“So did you and Tess,” he pointed out.

“More like true lies,” Kyle grumbled.

“Look at some point, you just gotta get over that if you ever wanna be with her again.”

“I do,” Kyle insisted. “I do wanna be with her.”

“Then what’s stopping you?” As much as he didn’t want to sound too forceful, he did want to get through to his friend. “Look, it’s different for you than it is for me. You don’t have a pregnant ex-girlfriend holding you back. You’re the only thing in your way.”

Kyle nodded in acknowledgement of that fact.

“Just call her,” Michael told him, “hang out with her, see what happens. You can still have a wonderful life, you know, a life with Tess.”

“Yeah.” Kyle raked his hands through his hair, looking nervous about the prospect. “Say it again, Frank,” he practically pleaded. “Say it again.”

Frank sat up, stuck his tongue out, and panted.

“Hmm,” Kyle said. “Maybe we’ll just stick to paper-training.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tess was on her way out the door, already five minutes late for work, when her cell phone rang, startling her. She dropped her purse and her design sketchbook, groaned in frustration, and took her phone out of her pocket. “Hello?” she answered impatiently.

“Hey, it’s . . . it’s me.”

She recognized that voice immediately. “Kyle?” She kicked her sketchbook aside and walked dazedly into her kitchen. She was going to have to sit down.

“Hey,” he said.

“Hey.” She sat down at her kitchen counter, feeling her heartbeat ratchet up a few notches. “How’s it going?” She couldn’t think of anything less lame to ask.

“Good, good,” he replied. “Or . . . okay, at least.”

“Yeah. For me, too.” Although things were going a lot better now that she was hearing from him.

“So listen, I was kind of wondering if we could hang out today,” he came right out and said.

Her mouth dropped open, and she almost squealed. “Really?” She pinched her cheek to make sure she wasn’t dreaming. “Ow.”

“Ow?”

“I-I mean, yes. I’d love to you,” she told him.

“Cool. So . . . I can just come over now or . . .”

She noticed her sketchbook and purse on the floor again and slammed the palm of her hand against her head. “Oh, you can’t!”

“What?”

“Sorry, I totally spaced,” she apologized. “I have to go to work today. I’m actually on my way out the door right now.”

“Oh.” Kyle sounded disappointed. “Some other time then.”

“How about tonight?” She wasn’t willing to let this chance pass her by. And hell, nighttime was more romantic. “I only have to work until 6:00, so do you wanna come by around 8:00?” That gave her ample time to get beautiful for him.

“Yeah. Yeah, that’ll work.”

“Great,” she chirped, already envisioning it in her mind. At last, the two of them could reconcile.

“Great,” he echoed.

“I’ll see you at 8:00.”

“See you.”

Tess flipped her phone closed and literally bounced off the stool at her counter. She let out the high-pitched squeal she had been holding in and danced around in a circle, jumping up and down excitedly. “Yes!”

“What’s wrong with you?” Maria asked, stepping over her sketchbook on her way in the front door. “I’m just here to get more boxes, by the way. Marty’s leaving.”

“Oh, really, where’s he going?”

“Massachusetts.” Maria shrugged. “Selfishly, I’m really gonna miss him.”

“Yeah, I’ll bet.” Tess wanted to be sympathetic and console her best friend about her brother’s impending departure, but she was on cloud nine, and she wanted to revel in her own happiness for awhile. “Hey, Maria, do you think you and Liz can . . . go away tonight, say from about 8:00 onward?” she asked, and without waiting for an answer added, “Thanks, I really appreciate it.”

Maria gave her a confused look. “Huh?”

“I’ll tell you about it later,” Tess promised, bending down to pick up her purse and her sketchbook. “I gotta get to work. Wish me luck. I got a big night ahead of me!” She practically danced out the door, a flurry of anticipation.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria begrudgingly brought Liz along with her to the grocery store that evening. She really had no desire to spend any time with the girl, but Liz had made it clear that she was going wherever Maria went.

“Well, I gotta hand it to you, Maria,” Liz said as they walked down the canned goods aisle. “The grocery store. It’s not exactly the most happening place in town, but at least we won’t starve.”

“This is what you have to look forward to when you get your own apartment, Liz, grocery shopping,” Maria informed her. “No more on-campus dining hall for you.”

“I don’t mind,” Liz said. “I got sick of that food anyway. Still, though, the grocery store? We’re young and we’re beautiful. We should go somewhere fun.”

“Look, I know it’s no Evans Hotel,” Maria snapped, “but it’ll have to do. Tess seems to think she’s getting laid tonight, so she wants us gone.”

“Well, I hope it works out for her,” Liz said. “You know, the laying or riding or . . . whatever position they do it in.”

“I don’t know why any of us even bother with sex. It never works out,” Maria grumbled, stopping in front of the applesauce. Where the hell was the damn rosy applesauce?

“That’s bleak,” Liz remarked. She picked up a can of peaches and asked, “Do we need peaches?”

Tess and I need applesauce,” Maria told her, settling for a can of the regular applesauce. “You need to find an apartment.”

“Are you ever gonna stop being a bitch to me?” Liz asked.

“Depends. Are you ever gonna stop sleeping with the scumbag who raped me?” Maria turned her back on her and continued on down the aisle with applesauce in hand.

Liz followed after her. “Look, Maria, I’m not excusing what he did . . .”

“But you are,” Maria said, whirling around, “because you’re giving him what he wants, which is you, in case you haven’t noticed.”

“He told me he loved me today. Am I supposed to just disregard that?”

“You know what, Liz? I really don’t care what you do. Be with Max. Have your inevitable misery and your bordering-on-violent sex. I’ve got too much going on in my own life to give a damn about yours.”

Liz looked somewhat hurt by those words. “You were a lot nicer when you were with Michael,” she said.

Maria rolled her eyes and stomped over to the next aisle. Liz could be such a bitch.

“So where are we going after this?” Liz asked, still tagging along.

We aren’t going anywhere. I’m gonna go stay with Marty. I assume you’re gonna go stay with your boyfriend.”

“Well, you assume wrong.” Liz stopped at the feminine products and picked up a box of tampons. “Whatever. Student Union’s open all night, right? I guess I could just go there.”

“That’s where all the homeless people sleep,” Maria informed her as she neared the shampoos and conditioners. She pretended to be all interested in the various brands while Liz kept on talking.

“Well then, I should fit right in. I mean, you’ve made it pretty clear that I am technically homeless since I’m not welcome with you and Tess.” She shrugged. “Doesn’t matter. You’ll be glad to know that I actually found an apartment today. I won’t be in your way much longer. I just have to have my parents co-sign some rent forms, and then that’s it. I’ll be out of your hair.”

“Good,” Maria grunted.

“It’s a really nice place,” Liz boasted. “Highland View. Have you heard of it?”

Maria tensed. “Yeah, Marty and Francis live there. Or at least they do for one more night.”

“Are they moving?” Liz asked.

Maria nodded.

“Where?”

“Massachusetts. Gay marriage,” she explained quickly.

“Oh. Well, at least things are working out for them.”

Maria grabbed a bottle of Pantene Pro-V shampoo. It wasn’t even the kind she usually used, but she just wanted to get all her items and get checked out at this point.

“What apartment does Marty live in?” Liz asked, still following after her, even though she thought she’d made it abundantly clear that she didn’t want to be followed.

“Maria, did you hear me?”

She rolled her eyes, annoyed. “405B.”

“Oh my god, seriously? That’s totally the apartment I’m renting. Small world, huh?”

Maria slowed her pace gradually until she had come to a stop. “Too small.” Just perfect. The person she wanted to stay was leaving and the person she wanted to leave was staying.

“Maria, can’t you just be happy for me?” Liz asked, sounding almost desperate.

Maria turned around to face her, absolutely pissed off at her for reasons she herself didn’t even quite understand. “No, I can’t, Liz, because my brother’s moving to the other side of the country, and you’re just gonna barge into his home and make it yours. And I’ll hardly ever see him, and I’ll see you all the time, and I like him better than you. It’s not fair.”

“You should just be happy for him,” Liz advised.

“And you should stay the hell away from me.” Maria snatched a box of doughnuts off the shelf and stomped towards the check-out counters. Liz didn’t follow her this time.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Kyle stood outside the door to Tess’s apartment for a minute that evening, trying to collect himself. He was so nervous. His palms were sweating and his throat was dry. He’d been looking forward to this all day, but now that 8:00 had rolled around . . . holy crap, he was a mass of apprehension.

He took in a few deep, steadying breaths and knocked on the door. Please let this go well tonight, he thought desperately. Please.

When Tess came to the door, she looked absolutely stunning. She was wearing a mauve-pink halter dress covered with big, white polka dots, knee-length. Her hair was long and wavy, and her smile upon seeing him was excited and inviting.

“Hey,” she greeted.

“Wow.” He could barely even formulate a coherent thought. On anyone else, that dress would have just been mediocre, but on her. “You look . . .”

“You look . . . too,” she returned, blushing a little.

He shrugged. “Not really.” He was wearing one of his semi-nice shirts, jeans, and a jacket. “I think I’m under-dressed.”

“Or maybe I’m over-dressed.” Her eyes widened after she said that, as did his. If she was over-dressed, was she insinuating that she wanted him to . . . undress her?

“Come in,” she said, pulling the door open wider.

He stepped inside, inconspicuously wiping his sweaty palms against the front of his pants. “Wow,” he said, looking around. “Déjà vu.” It was the same old apartment, pink as ever. Tess had dimmed down all the lights, though, and there were dozens of candles lit throughout the apartment, most vanilla-scented. Soft, melodic music drifted in the background. “It’s been awhile since I’ve been here.”

“Yeah, I actually do still have electricity,” she assured him as she shut the front door. “I just felt like lighting some candles.”

He nodded. If she’d been trying to set a romantic mood, she’d definitely succeeded. “Looks nice.”

“Oh, and I baked something for you, too.” She scurried into the kitchen, her pink high heels clicking against the tile floor, and took something out of the refrigerator, something that immediately appealed to his taste buds. “I tried,” she added. “I had to make it in a hurry. I know cherry cheesecake’s your favorite.” She smiled, then as an afterthought asked, “It is your favorite, right?”

“Yeah.” He was surprised she’d remembered. “Thank you, thank you. You didn’t have to do all this.”

She put the cheesecake back in the refrigerator and shrugged. “It’s not much.”

It was, though. He looked around at her apartment, at the ambiance, and he looked at her . . . this felt very date-like. And he was pretty much okay with that.

“Wanna sit down?” she asked, motioning towards the couch.

“Sure.”

“Okay. Here, let me take your coat first.”

“Oh.” He slipped his coat off his shoulders and handed it to her. “Thanks.”

She smiled and draped his coat over the back of the reclining chair. Then she sat down on the couch and patted the unoccupied cushion beside her, looking up at him expectantly.

He sat down beside her, fearing that he was about to pee in his pants. He felt like the Kyle Valenti who had never slept with Tess Harding, the one who spent most of his time watching her from afar and was delighted at the mere idea of talking to her. He felt like the Kyle he’d been when she’d fallen into the arms—or rather fins—of his man-eating shark Halloween costume.

“Is it just the two of us here?” he asked carefully. He didn’t want to sound like he was suggesting something.

“Yeah,” Tess replied, “Liz and Maria are out.”

“Liz?” he echoed confusingly. “Liz lives here now?” Just how far out of the loop was he?

“Oh, it’s a . . . temporary thing. Very temporary,” Tess explained. “She needed a place to crash and I had an empty couch, so . . .” She shook her head and rolled her eyes. “I can’t wait ‘til she leaves.”

“Well, that’s really generous of you, considering your guys’ history,” he remarked. He never would have pictured Liz and Tess being able to live under the same roof for any amount of time.

“Well, I’m a big believer in second chances these days,” she said. “Just because a person makes a mistake, that’s no reason to shut her out of your life. Everyone has the potential to be better than they were before.”

The subtext there was more text than sub. She wasn’t referring to Liz so much as she was referring to herself, and he got that.

“Drink?” she asked, holding up a glass of what looked to be champagne.

He bristled. “Oh, uh . . . I don’t know. The last time I got drunk . . . well, you remember. I don’t.”

“Yeah, that’s why I went with Ginger Ale.” She handed him a glass.

“Oh. Okay, then.” He held up his glass. “Cheers.”

“Cheers.” They lightly tapped their glasses together and both took a sip. Tess set her glass down and said, “Look, Kyle . . .” right about the same time he said, “Tess . . .”

She laughed a little. “You first.”

“No, go ahead.” He set his glass down on the coffee table next to his, eager to hear what she had to say.

“I know this is awkward,” she said, “and I think it’s supposed to be that way. But I’m really glad you’re here. I’ve missed you so much this past month. Sometimes I feel like I can barely keep my head above water.”

Kyle nodded, understanding that feeling. “Do you realize we’ve been apart for as long as we were together?” he said.

“Feels like it’s been longer. Do you ever notice how the bad times just drag on, and the good times fly by so fast, you barely get the chance to experience them?”

“Yeah,” he agreed, “it seems like that.” He always felt as though he hadn’t had enough time with her.

“We did make good memories, though, didn’t we?” she asked. “Because I think we did.”

“It’s hard to say,” he admitted. “Because the whole time we were together, we weren’t communicating at all. You thought we were just having fun, and I thought we were—I don’t know—soul mates or something.”

“Maybe we are.” She both looked and sounded hopeful when she said that.

“No, you’re right, though, we had good times.”

“Yeah.” She smiled. “Whack-a-Mole. Britney Spears.”

“Just talking, hanging out.”

“Deflowering.” She grinned.

“Hey . . .” He laughed, taking the teasing in stride. He really was glad she was his first, though, even if he had been drunk.

She turned serious again and said, “I know I hurt you, Kyle, and I’m so sorry for that. I never meant to.”

He knew that. He’d always known. “Let’s not talk about the past anymore,” he suggested. “Let’s focus on tonight.”

“Tonight. Yeah.” She picked up her glass again and motioned for him to do the same.

“Here’s to tonight,” he proclaimed, knocking his glass against hers. A bit of his Ginger Ale spilled over onto his lap.

“Oh, sorry,” she apologized.

“No, that’s okay. That’s just my luck, huh?”

She laughed a little and set her glass back down. The song in the background switched, and suddenly she inquired, “You wanna dance?”

“Adia, I do believe I’ve failed you
Adia, I know I’ve let you down
Don’t you know I’ve tried so hard
To love you in my way
It’s easy let it go . . .”


His eyes bulged. Dancing meant close contact. Very close.

“Sorry, is that too prom night?”

He gulped down some of his Ginger Ale to relieve his nervously dry throat and set the glass back down. “No, it’s not. Proms usually have more people than this. Not mine, but I’ve heard rumors.”

She smiled. “Let’s dance. I love this song.”

He loved that she loved it, so he rose to his feet, held out his hand, and pulled her up along with him. They went out into the center of the living room and stood before each other, staring at each other questioningly before they began to dance.

“Adia, I’m empty since you left me
Trying to find a way to carry on
I search myself and everyone
To see where we went wrong.”


She wrapped both her arms around his neck and he placed both his hands in the curve of her waist. His heart was pounding a mile a minute. He could smell her perfume, and it was intoxicating. He’d forgotten how good she smelled.

He kept his head up, his eyes looking forward so as not to look down at her. He didn’t want things to get too weird. It was weird enough already, the two of them just dancing like this, for no reason at all. But he loved it.

“There’s no one left to finger
There’s no one here to blame
There’s no one left to talk to, honey
And there ain’t no one to buy our innocence.”


“This is nice,” she practically whispered. She was keeping her head downcast as though to avoid looking at him in the same manner.

“Yeah,” he agreed, feeling his legs shaking. Literally shaking. Why was he so nervous? This was Tess. This was him, and this was Tess, and that was all that mattered.

He rubbed the small of her back with his hands, just to see what her response would be.

“‘Cause we are born innocent
Believe me, Adia
We are still innocent
It’s easy, we all falter
But does it matter?”


She slowly lifted her head to look at him. Her eyes were such a beautiful shade of blue. He got lost in them all the time, especially when they were in bed together and her eyes became stormy.

He couldn’t think about that right now.

“What’s wrong?” she asked.

“Nothing. I’m just focused,” he replied. “I gotta focus or else I’ll . . .” He accidentally stepped on her foot.

“Ow!” she yelped.

“Do that. I’m sorry,” he apologized. “You okay?”

“Minimal damage,” she assured him. “Keep dancing.” She smiled at him, seemingly enjoying this as much as he was. But she didn’t seem nearly as nervous.

He nodded and looked down at his feet, intent on not stepping on hers again.

“Adia, I thought that we could make it
I know I can’t change the way you feel
I leave you with your misery
A friend who won’t betray.”


She inched closer towards him, but he noticed it. He felt it. He felt the heat from her body, and he wondered if she could feel the heat from his. Or if she could feel him shaking. He couldn’t stop shaking. He felt like a dog at the vet. He felt all on edge.

She trailed her right hand lower, down over his shoulder to rest atop his heart. She stared at it, and he had no doubt that she could feel that much of him. It was beating so hard and fast, it was going to break his chest.

“Pull you from your tower
Take away your pain
Show you all the beauty you possess
If you’d only let yourself believe . . .”


He backed away from her slowly, disentangling her from his arms. He didn’t want to appear as though he weren’t interested. He was most definitely interested. He just needed to take a moment to breathe and process everything that was happening, or everything that seemed as though it were going to happen.

“What?” she asked. “Did I do something wrong?”

“No.” She was doing everything right. He remembered how fast they had taken things last time, though, and a little voice in his head shouted at him to put on the breaks.

“That we are born innocent
Believe me, Adia
We are still innocent
It’s easy, we all falter
But does it matter?”


“Just give me a minute,” he told her as he slipped past her and headed down the hallway to the bathroom. He really didn’t mean to be rude, but if he stood there and danced with her a moment longer, he was going to faint or do something else embarrassing. It wasn’t meant as an insult, but he had to get away from her for a moment just so that he could function.

He shut the door to the bathroom and turned on the light. He looked at himself in the mirror, and the awkward kid he saw staring back at him was far from a romantic stud. But Tess liked him. She wanted him. And that was all that mattered. If she wanted somebody like Max, she would’ve been dancing with someone like Max. She wouldn’t have been dancing with him.

He took a few deep breaths to steady himself, just like the ones he’d taken before entering her apartment, and was ready to head back out there when he caught sight of something in the trash can next to the toilet seat.

It was a purple box, small and apparently empty. He wouldn’t have even given it a second look had it not had the words Pregnancy Test printed on the front of it.

Kyle reached down and picked up the empty box slowly. Why was there a pregnancy test box in Tess’s bathroom? Stupid question. The better question was, where was the test itself? He didn’t see it in the trash can.

All the nerves that he’d felt while dancing with Tess multiplied by about a thousand in an instant.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tess paced back and forth in her living room, relieved when Kyle finally came out of the bathroom. “You okay?” she asked, not sure why he had hurried in there so quickly anyway.

“‘Cause we are born innocent
Believe me, Adia
We are still innocent
It’s easy, we all falter
But does it matter?”


He looked . . . dazed. And confused. And worried.

“Kyle?”

“I think I saw something I wasn’t supposed to,” he mumbled. “Or maybe I was supposed to.”

“What’re you talking about?” She looked down and saw a small box in his hand. He looked her right in the eye and held up the empty box. Pregnancy test.

Tess immediately reached over and turned off the music. “Where’d you find that?” she asked.

“In the bathroom. I wasn’t snooping or anything,” he assured. “I just . . .” He swallowed hard and handed the box to her. He looked truly scared, but he asked the questions anyway. “Was that your test?”

She looked down at the box in her hand. It felt . . . heavy, even though there wasn’t anything in it. “Kyle . . .”

“Just tell me,” he said, “is it yours?”

She stared at the box for a few more seconds before lifting her eyes to look at him. “Yeah,” she answered. “Yeah, it’s . . . I bought a pregnancy test.”

“And you took it?”

She shuddered.

“Are you pregnant?”

“No.”

“You sure?”

“Yes.”

For some reason, he didn’t seem to believe her. “Are you telling me the truth?”

“Yes!”

“Well, you can’t blame me for asking. It’s not like you haven’t lied to me before.”

She grunted, offended by that. She hadn’t lied. She had mis-communicated. There was a difference, a big difference.

“So you’re not pregnant?”

How many times did she have to say it to get him to believe her? “I’m not pregnant.”

“Because all of a sudden I’m thinkin’ back, and there was that time with the broken condom . . .”

“Kyle.” She pushed back tears. “I’m not pregnant, okay? Just believe me.”

“Then why did you buy a test?”

“Because . . . I’m late, but I took the test and it came back negative, so it’s fine. Okay?” She didn’t like this. She didn’t like this at all. She could feel the evening slipping from her grasp. They hadn’t finished their dance, but it was too late to do that now.

“What’d you do with the test?”

“Why are you interrogating me?”

“Why don’t you just answer the question?”

She huffed. This definitely wasn’t the supportive male most girls longed for in a potential pregnancy situation. “I . . . threw it away. Can’t you just trust me?”

“I don’t know, can I?”

She stared at him in disbelief. So Kyle was just like every other guy in this respect. Confronted with the possibility of fatherhood, he became an ass. “I don’t know what’s worse, you insinuating that you can’t trust me, or you freaking out, like the thought of having a baby with me would be the worst thing in the entire world.”

“Well, it would be!” he roared.

That hurt. That hurt her heart to hear that. How could Kyle say that to her? How could Kyle . . .

“I mean . . .”

“No, please don’t go on.” She didn’t want to hear anymore. The more he said, the worse she felt.

“It’s just that we’re not even together right now,” he explained.

“Yeah, and at this rate we’re never gonna be.” She started to cry and dabbed at the tears clouding her eyes. She had always wanted to think that Kyle would be there for her no matter what, through thick and thin. But apparently she’d thought wrong.

“I’m having a hard time understanding how you can be mad at me here,” he said.

“I’m not mad, Kyle. I’m just disappointed,” she corrected.

“Well, I’m a little disappointed that you thought you might be pregnant and you didn’t even see fit to tell me,” he shot back.

“Look, it doesn’t matter, okay?” she cried. “I’m not. Let’s just forget about it.”

“No, I’m goin’ home,” he decided. “This was a bad idea. We weren’t ready for this.” He grabbed his coat and started for the door.

“Ready for what?’

“Just . . . any of it.” He shook his head and walked out the door, slamming it shut behind him.

Tess took in a shaky breath and let it out once he was gone. It was as though all energy had just disappeared from her body.

She glanced down at the box in her hand and then back at the front door. This was not good. This was not good at all.








TBC . . .

-April
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LOVE IS MICHAEL AND MARIA.
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April
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Part 64

Post by April »

So I'm a little late getting this update out today. It's because I slept in until 10:30 and then laid around awhile longer. Laziness is a necessity once in awhile, really. I think in the case of today's update, though, the wait will be worth it.

Yasmania:
Great part. I'm sad that they're still sad but as usual your story just sucks me in to the point where I'm here reading it instead of getting ready for work!
:lol: Sometimes I'll be reading fic when I should be studying or heading to work, too!

Sara:
And Max, he is becoming slimy to me again, not that he ever stopped being slimy, but I just don't know what to think anymore.
Yeah, Max never really stopped being "slimy" as you put it. Trust me, though, he'll never revert to the way he was at the beginning of this story.

Leila:
To have an emotionally working Maria,I propose that you give her a baseball bat then we see what happens. Baseball bats work wonders.
:lol: I'm not giving her a baseball bat! Although that's a good idea.

spacegirl23:
Tensions are too high.
And the tension is going to get higher in this part.
Also, am I the only one who thinks that Tess may be pregnant? I may be reading more into her actions as I should, but I'm a bit suspicious.
You may be reading more into her actions than you should. Or you may not.

Yeah, that line from Part 47 was meant to foreshadow everything that was yet to come. There were a lot of lines like that.

By the way, your name is Trixie, right? I really need to start calling you by your name instead of your username. :lol:

Krista:
But I think Maria's being very hypocritical by alienating Liz the way she is because of the fact that Liz is going out with Max. Tess went out with him for so long, and Maria didn't do the same to her. Granted, Tess is Maria's best friend, but Maria told Liz she would've been behind her no matter what if she hadn't done what she did and it's such a lie.
I think part of Maria's hostility towards Liz arises from the fact that she lumps Liz into the same category as Isabel right now. They're both manipulative, deceitful cheaters in her mind.
I suppose Liz's situation is relatable to women who stay with abusers because they're "in love." They know it's not smart, but they can't get out. Only it's not the same, because Liz isn't getting beat or anything. Her head is just confused.
Exactly.

Eva:
I really felt sorry for Tess this time. Though you know Kyle has a trust issue due to their previous encounters AND his lack in experience in relationships, he reacted rather harsh.
Yeah, that conversation definitely could have been a calm conversation, but Kyle got freaked out and said some hurtful things and it wasn't a calm conversation.

nibbles:
I don't like this thing where an argument has to be somebody's fault. It's not black and white.
I totally agree. I think every argument that's taken place in this story, with the exception of maybe some arguments involving Max and/or Isabel have been grey arguments and not black and white. Or at least that's what I've been aiming for.

And yeah, that line from Part 10 you quoted . . . major foreshadowing. :(

Alison:
I didn't actually see any ball rollingness... I saw Kyle being a bit of a ballbag, but no actual forward momentum of spherical objects.
You'll see more ball rollingness in this part. And I say more because, trust me, there was rollingness in the last part. Rollingness? :lol:

Nove:
I feel so dirty when I say I love Max's actions.
Yeah, I feel the same.
And case in point why I haven't forgiven Tess yet, she still sees the whole mess as a miss communication problem and not that she lied to him.
It's not easy to admit that you intentionally lied to someone you love, and even though I think there was a lot of miscommunication, at the end of day, I think you're right. Tess lied to Kyle when they were dating/friends with benefitting.

killjoy: Dude, I knew that part was going to get you worked up! You wanted Lamptrimmer stuff, and you got it . . . except you got Lamptrimmer fighting. :? Shame on me.

Ginger:
As for the pregnancy test in Tess' bathroom, thank God it was hers. Can you imagine Maria being pregnant on top of all of this chaos...Good Lord!!!
That would be potentially disastrous.

tequathisy:
Have you no consideration of our feelings?
Nope. I'm a sociopath like that. ;)

Christina:
Oh, April. You're so cruel. Especially for teasing us and saying that the ball would be a rollin' and then it totally deflating instead. Meanie!
I promise that it rolled! You'll see in this part how it rolled in the last part.
I think it was kinda clear with how nervous and uneasy Kyle seemed to be around Tess that he wasn't ready to start a relationship with her again. Methinks they still need to talk about what happened in a more civilized manner.
Yeah, I think they were both moving a little too fast in the last part. They went from barely talking to having this romantic evening. So it was kind of inevitable that the evening crumbled.
And well... Maria is pretty annoying right now. I miss her spark and want it back just like all the rest.
A lot of people have been asking me, "Where has Maria's spark gone?" And I think this part will provide some answers to that question.

Karin: Nice serenade. ;)


Oh, these little "stalker" bits just crack me up like no other. Seriously.









Part 64








Maria drove Marty and Francis to the airport the next morning, early in the morning. She stood in line with them while they checked their bags, then followed them to the security checkpoint, beyond which she could not follow without a plane ticket. They said their goodbyes there.

“Mmm, bye, Francis.” She hugged her brother’s boyfriend and said, “I’m so glad you’re the guy Marty decided to settle down with.” Anyone else would have been inadequate.

“Me, too,” Francis said before whispering in her ear, “I’ll take care of him for you.”

“Hmm.” She smiled, happy to hear that.

When Francis released Maria from the hug, he turned to Marty and said, “I’ll get in the security line. You catch up with me whenever you’re ready.”

Marty nodded, and Francis smiled at Maria one last time as he stepped into the long security checkpoint line. That left Maria standing with her brother, the one person besides Tess who had always been there for her.

“This is all happening so fast,” she said in a rush of breath.

“I know. I’m sorry,” Marty apologized.

“Don’t be sorry. Be happy. You’re starting this whole new chapter of your life. With the man you love, stallion.”

He chuckled. “I do love him. Oh, speaking of love . . .”

Maria shook her head. “Let’s not.”

“No, let’s,” he persisted. “I’m hoping and praying that you and Michael will be together again someday. And I think you will be. You know why? That Big Boy is destined to be my brother-in-law.”

“Well . . .” She shrugged. “Anything’s possible.”

“That’s right, anything’s possible,” Marty agreed. “Oh, I almost forgot . . .” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a long, brass key and handed it to her. “The key to the storage unit I rented here in town. I’m gonna be taking care of most of the moving instructions over the phone, which is gonna be a pain in my sexy ass, but I figured someone in Santa Fe should have a key in case I need help.”

“I won’t lose it,” she promised, pulling her car keys out of her purse to add this new key to the key ring. “Oh, speaking of losing it, I talked to Mom this morning.”

“Losing it?” he echoed questioningly.

“Yeah, you know how she’s lost, like, all of her inhibitions with Ed Harding. Anyway, she said she’s planning on visiting you in your new house once she gets back from Vegas and once you get settled in.”

“Mom’s in Vegas?” Marty spat in disbelief. “And the weird just keeps on coming. Well, whatever, I just hope she’s nice to Francis.”

“She will be,” Maria promised. “She’s like a different and less annoying person these days.”

“Ed Harding must have some crazy bedroom skills.”

“Well, it’s always the--”

“Quiet ones,” he filled in. “Yeah, do you believe that? Because I’m not quiet, but I’ve got skills from here to the . . . hills.” He laughed.

She laughed right along with him, feeling tears sting her eyes. She was going to miss this so much. Marty always knew just what to say to make her forget about her own problems, to make her feel like everything was going to be better someday.

“Well,” he said, glancing back over his shoulder at the line Francis was standing in. He had moved up a significant distance already. “I guess this is it then.”

Maria nodded, trying to keep it together. “Do you realize we’ve never lived more than two hours apart?” she asked him. When she had lived in Roswell, so had he, but when she had decided to move to Santa Fe to attend college, he had gone with her because he didn’t want her to be alone, never mind the fact that she’d had Tess with her, too.

“It’s gonna be a change,” Marty admitted. “But hey, all you gotta do is convince New Mexico to legalize same-sex marriage and I’ll be on the first flight back.”

She nodded. “Motivation to become an advocate.”

“There you go.” He let out a shaky, heavy breath and reached out to hold her hands in his. “Oh, I’m really gonna miss you,” he said. “You’re not just my sister; you’re one of my best friends. In the entire world.”

“You, too,” she assured him, feeling a solitary tear spill over. She knew there were more where that came from.

“Take care of yourself, Maria,” he said. “And call me if you need anything. Seriously.”

“Seriously,” she echoed. If her life got too topsy-turvy, which it sometimes did, she wouldn’t hesitate to ring him up.

“Okay, let’s hug it out,” he said, opening up his arms.

She walked towards him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, hugging him tightly as the rest of her tears started to flow. They were like waterfalls. She couldn’t stop them.

“I love you, sis,” he said, sounding choked up himself.

“I love you, too,” she whimpered. In the most selfish of ways, she really didn’t want him to go.

They stood in silence and kept hugging each other for at least a full minute before Maria finally let go of him and tried to smile supportively. “Better go,” she said, motioning towards the line. Francis was practically at the front of it now. “You’ve got a flight to catch.”

“Right,” Marty said, wiping his hand under his nose as he blinked back his own tears. “Alright. Let’s fly, bitches.”

Maria laughed at that and watched him go. He fell into line beside Francis, set off the security alarm when he went through the security scanner, and grinned at her excitedly as one of the more attractive male scanners frisked him up and down. It ended up being a watch that set the scanner off. He looked disappointed when the frisk was over.

As he and Francis headed off to their gate, they both turned around and waved goodbye to her. Crying, she waved back at them, then waited until they had rounded the corner and vanished from her sight to really break down. She sat down on the floor in the middle of the airport and buried her face in her hands as strangers passed her by.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Liz stood inside her new apartment, her arms crossed over her chest as she surveyed the place. It was definitely nice, but the model apartment they’d shown her had somehow seemed . . . nicer. Probably because it actually had furniture in it. All this apartment had was the stove, the refrigerator, the counter, the cabinets . . . all the things that hadn’t belonged to Martin DeLuca. And carpet, thankfully. But not much else.

She felt Max come inside more than she heard him. He stepped up beside her and commented. “Nice. Kind of pedestrian, but I can see this working for you.” He sniffed at the air and asked, “Why does it smell like sex in here?”

“Maria’s brother used to live here,” she replied.

“Oh, that explains it.”

She rolled her eyes. Why was he there? Why was he always wherever she was? “You really are following me, aren’t you?”

“Come on, I’m not that creepy. No, one of my many janitors lives down the hall. At first I was pissed at him for speaking to me today, but when he told me saw you stop by the Highland View apartments to talk to the landlord . . . well, then my interest piqued. Hell, I felt like giving him a promotion.”

“Did you?” she asked.

“No, I fired him. He was a bad janitor.” Max sauntered into the kitchen and hopped up on the counter. “So,” he said, trailing his right pointer finger over the fake marble countertop, “by the looks of things, you have a new apartment but no furniture to put in it. How cozy.”

“At least Marty left the bed,” she said. It was kind of . . . falling apart, though, seemed like it had been used a lot.

“Do you really wanna sleep where those queers fucked?”

“Max!” That was a horrible thing to say.

“Although, I could be wrong. Maybe they didn’t do it in the bed. Some people have a thing for shower sex.” He grinned at her.

“Okay, now that I can officially tell you to get off my property, I’m gonna do it,” she decided. “Leave, Max.”

“It’s not your property. You’re a renter,” he pointed out.

“Can you just go?” She really needed time to settle in to her new place, and she couldn’t do that with him there.

Max stared at her for a moment, then surprised her by saying, “Alright.” He hopped down off the counter, reached into his back pocket, took out his wallet, and scribbled something down on a check first. He tore it out and handed it to her. “Here.”

“What is this?” she asked. He’d written it out for three-thousand dollars.

“It’s this month’s rent, plus enough money to buy furniture,” he said. “Make sure you get a comfortable couch. I don’t fancy springs poking up into my back when you’re on top.”

She made a face. “You think you’re actually gonna spend time here?”

“Oh, I know it.” He smirked and headed for the door.

“I’m not taking this,” she said, scurrying beside him, trying to hand it back to him.

“Why wouldn’t you? A part-time tutoring job isn’t gonna cut it, Liz. Let me help you.”

“No.” Max didn’t know how to help people; he knew how to hurt people. Two totally different things.

“I’m trying to do something good here,” he insisted.

“Yeah, like that’s possible.”

He glared at her, seemingly angered when she said that. “Fine. Keep the check. Cash it if you want,” he told her. “I don’t care.” He stormed out of the apartment and slammed the door. She stood there with the check in her hand, feeling kind of . . . bad. Maybe giving her money really was Max’s way of trying to help.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Isabel was on her way to the art museum to visit Michael at work—she’d stopped by Arby’s and picked up some lunch for him—when she ran into Tess coming out of the English department. She had that look on her face, the one all college students wore at some point, the god-dammit-I-think-I-just-flunked-that-test look. Isabel smirked. Serves you right, bitch.

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t the journal thief,” Isabel called, approaching her. Tess stopped dead in her tracks. “You look horrible. I like that.”

Tess rolled her eyes. “Look, Isabel, I’m . . .” She gulped as though the next word were hard to get out. “. . . sorry I took your journal. It was an invasion of privacy, and it was wrong of me.” She didn’t sound genuinely sorry at all.

“Wow,” Isabel said. “You’re pathetic.”

“I’m trying to apologize.”

“No, you’re not.” Isabel narrowed her eyes at the girl and studied her suspiciously. “You’re trying to suck-up,” she realized. “What do you want?”

“I was just . . .” Tess adjusted her backpack on her shoulders, looking as though she were trying to say something but having trouble saying it. “I was just kind of wondering about something.”

“About why your nose is so weird? Me, too.”

Tess self-consciously touched her nose, then waved off the insult and stepped closer towards her. “Isabel,” she said, her voice lower now, “what was it like for you when you were pregnant? I mean, during the early stages.”

She grunted. “Miserable. It’s still miserable.”

“But I guess what I’m asking is, what kind of symptoms did you have?” Tess re-phrased.

Isabel cocked her head to the side. “Why do you wanna know?”

“I’m just curious. I have a . . . research thing.”

“Then look it up online.”

“But it’s always better to get a first-hand account.”

So not subtle, Isabel thought, but she could play along. “Alright. Well, my boobs started hurting pretty much right away, and the food cravings kicked in around the second week. Obviously there was the missing period drama and the dreaded mood swings. Granted, I’m bitchy under normal circumstances, but these mood swings hit fast and hard. It was like PMS on steroids or PMS on speed.”

Tess nodded. “Uh-huh. Anything else?”

Isabel shrugged. “Just the overall sense of feeling pregnant, I guess. Why?”

“Oh, like I said, I’m . . . I’m just curious,” Tess sputtered.

“I’m sure you are.”

“Yeah. Well . . . I gotta go,” Tess said, starting away. “Tell Michael I said hi.”

Isabel watched her walk away. She was still so tiny. But that was all going to change.

Way to go, Kyle, she thought, grinning. Didn’t know you had it in you.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

When Kyle got a knock on his door that afternoon, he expected it to be Tess, or maybe even Maria. He didn’t expect Isabel, but lo and behold there she was, standing out in the hallway.

“Kyle, hi!” she exclaimed, a big, cheesy smile on her face. “I just wanted to be one of the first to stop by and say congratulations.”

He wrinkled his forehead in confusion. “Okay. On what?”

“Duh, your future fatherhood,” she said, playfully slugging his arm.

His eyes bulged. Had she just said . . .

“It’s so adorable that you and Tess are having a baby together.”

She had. His eyes bulged even farther. “What?”

“Oh, don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about, Mr. Dad,” she teased. “Gosh, you know, I’ve always known you wanna be like Mike, but this is emulation at a whole new level, wouldn’t you say?”

He couldn’t say anything. He was flabbergasted.

“Anyway, congratulations, like I said, and--”

“Isabel,” he cut in, “I don’t know what drugs you’re doing, but Tess is not pregnant.” She had assured him over and over again last night that she wasn’t.

“Of course she is; she’s totally glowing,” Isabel said. “Plus, she came up to me today and was asking me what it’s like to be pregnant. Oh, something tells me she already knows. Come on, Kyle, quit pretending. Fess up.”

Oh my god, he thought. Tess had seemed majorly freaked out when he’d walked out of the bathroom with that box in hand. And if she was asking Isabel questions . . .

“Or don’t, whatever,” Isabel said. “You’re gonna be an awesome dad, Kyle. And you and Tess are so sweet. So in love!” She squealed as skipped down the hallway, slipping into her own apartment and leaving it at that. It wasn’t five seconds later that Kyle felt his legs buckle underneath him, and the shock got the best of him as he fainted.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria stood in the kitchen, chowing down on her rosy applesauce when Tess walked in the door that evening. She looked distressed, tired.

“Hey,” Maria said. “Did you have to work tonight?”

“Yeah, I was hoping they wouldn’t keep me so late.” Tess took off her coat and hung it up in the hallway closet.

“Sounds more fun than what I did,” Maria mumbled.

“What’d you do?”

“I drove Marty and Francis to the airport, and then I watched their plane fly off.” She sighed, missing her brother already.

“Oh, that sucks that they left so fast,” Tess agreed, kicking off her shoes.

“Yeah,” Maria agreed, “but . . . I’m happy for them.” She really was. She’d be happier when she got used to him not being there anymore. “Oh, Liz is gone, too, by the way. Thank God.” She’d been at the end of her rope with that bitch. “She actually moved into Marty’s apartment. Talk about a downgrade for the apartment, huh?”

“Hmm, that’s weird how that worked out,” Tess remarked, coming into the kitchen. She stood on the opposite side of the counter as Maria, took in a deep breath, and said, “Listen, Maria, I gotta talk to you about something, and it’s a big something. I mean, it’s a really big deal.”

Are she and Kyle back together? Maria wondered, setting her spoon down in her bowl of applesauce. No, that’s not it. Tess would have been happy about that, but as she stood in the kitchen now, she seemed to be speaking with a sort of . . . dread. If Tess and Kyle had gotten back together, Tess would have told her before now. “Is everything okay?” she asked her friend.

“It’s kinda hard to say.” Tess bit her bottom lip, looked Maria right in the eye, and said, “You know how Kyle came over last night?”

Maria nodded. “Something tells me it didn’t end in hugs and kisses.”

“No.” Tess hung her head. “It actually ended in an argument. See, Kyle went in the bathroom and--”

“Oh my god, did he do the jack-hammer jerk-off?” Maria cut in.

Tess made a confused face. “I don’t even know what that is . . . so no. No, he-he found something. And he asked me about it.”

Maria shifted. “What’d he find?”

Tess sighed, then reached into her purse and took out a small box. A pregnancy test. She laid it on the counter, and Maria stared at it.

“I lied and said it was mine,” Tess confessed in a rush.

Maria tensed, her eyes never leaving the box.

“Maria, what’s going on?”

She just kept staring, wondering how she had forgotten to throw that box down the trash chute with the test itself.

“Because this is either your test or Liz’s, and since Liz was bitching to me the other day about how bad her menstrual cramps are, I’m thinking it’s not hers,” Tess went on. “And here you are eating rosy applesauce, which I happen to know is your least favorite food in the entire world . . . unless you’re really craving it.”

Maria didn’t say anything. She knew it was only a matter of time before Tess came right out and asked the question.

“Are you pregnant?”

It took almost every ounce of energy she had simply to lift her eyes up from the box. “No,” she practically whispered.

“But judging by the look on your face, this is your test,” Tess concluded. “Or at least the box, right?”

Maria swallowed hard and averted her eyes. “I meant to throw that out with the test. I don’t know why I didn’t.” Stupid. Stupid mistake.

Tess took a few steadying breaths. “Okay. So are you late, or . . .”

Maria nodded mutely.

“How late?”

She wrapped her arms around herself, suddenly feeling cold. “A week,” she replied quietly, looking down at her feet.

“But you took the test and it was negative.”

Maria slowly raised her eyes to look at her friend with wide, scared eyes and a trembling lower lip.

“You took the test and it was positive,” Tess realized, suddenly looking scared herself. “Oh my god, Maria.”

“But that doesn’t meant that I’m . . .” She refused to say the word. Because it didn’t apply to her. It didn’t. She grabbed the box and threw it into the trash can beneath the sink. “These tests can screw up all the time.

“No, not really, Maria.” Tess marched around to the other side of the counter, pulled the trash can out from under the sink, and took the box out of the trash. “You see this?” She pointed to words written on the box. “99 percent accurate. If it says you’re pregnant then . . .”

A few tears slipped from Maria’s eyes. She still had her arms wrapped tightly around herself.

“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be so blunt,” Tess apologized, “but . . .” She threw the test away back in the trash and pushed the trash can back under the sink. “I’m sorry,” she apologized, placing her hands on Maria’s shoulders. “But this is a really big deal. You gotta be honest with yourself.”

Maria gulped hard, trying to keep it together. “But do you remember when you worried you might be pregnant with Max’s baby? Remember, right after you guys broke up? You weren’t. You were just stressed about stuff. I’m stressed.”

“Yeah, but when I took a test, it came back negative,” Tess pointed out.

Maria backed away from Tess as the tears started to fall faster. “Lucky you.”

“Oh, sweetie, come here.” Tess swooped her up in a hug, not letting her distance herself. “It’s okay,” she assured her, stroking her hair comfortingly. “You’re gonna be okay.”

“No, I can’t be pregnant,” Maria cried, shaking her head. “I can’t.”

“Maria . . .”

“This can’t be happening.” She finally pulled away from Tess’s hug and walked around to the other side of the counter. “Oh god.” She raked one hand through her hair, touching her stomach with the other. In her head, the two pink lines she’d seen on the pregnancy test screamed at her.

“Okay, just breathe. Breathe, okay?” Tess instructed, following her wherever she went. She took one of Maria’s hands in her own and squeezed tightly. “Breathe.”

“Okay.” Maria took in and let out several shaky breaths, then tried to talk herself into believing what she knew wasn’t true. “I’m not pregnant,” she said. “I’m not.”

That look in Tess’s eyes was just so doubtful.

“I’m not,” Maria repeated. The words weren’t as convincing as they had been before she’d taken the test. “I don’t wanna be.” She felt her emotions overcome her, and she broke down crying again. She collapsed against her friend, and Tess held her up.

“Shh, it’s okay.”

“What am I gonna do, Tess?” she wailed. “I’m . . .” She still didn’t want to say the word. Saying it made it real. Maybe if she just didn’t say it . . .

“You’re pregnant,” Tess filled in, saying the words for her.

“No,” Maria whimpered, looking at her pleadingly. She really didn’t want to be.

“Maria, I have to ask you something,” Tess said, “and don’t be mad at me for asking, but . . . is it Michael’s? It is, right?”

“Of course.” There was no possible way it could be anyone else’s.

“Okay, that’s what I thought. Good. That’s good,” Tess said.

“How is that good? We’re not even together anymore, and he’s . . .” She shook her head angrily, picturing Isabel. Isabel and her fat pregnant belly. “He’s already having a baby. With Isabel.” She growled, angry now. Her mood was already changing on a dime. “God, he should be, like, outlawed from having sex because his sperm is just out of control!”

“But Maria, you love him. That’s why it’s good,” Tess explained. “You love him, and he’s . . . he’s Michael.”

Maria shook her head. “That doesn’t matter.”

“It does.”

“But I’m still pregnant!” The moment the word left her mouth, she realized it. Her eyes went completely wide and her mouth gaped. She covered her open mouth with one astonished hand and slumped forward, pressing her face against her friend’s shoulder.

“Come on, sit down,” Tess said, helping her over to the couch. “Sit down.”

Heaving sobs began to control Maria’s body as she sat down on the couch. Tess sat down with her, rubbing her hand up and down her back.

“Oh my god,” Maria said, looking down at her stomach. She scrunched her shirt up in her hands and frowned. “I can’t believe there’s something in there.”

“It’s . . . really surreal,” Tess agreed. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

“I just didn’t.” Maria shrugged helplessly. “I’m scared.”

“You don’t have to be,” Tess assured her. “You’ve got me and you’ve got Michael.”

“No, you can’t tell him.”

Tess frowned.

“Please, Tess. Don’t tell him anything,” Maria begged. She wasn’t ready for that.

“No, of course, that should be something you do,” Tess acknowledged.

“Please, Tess,” Maria repeated, even though her friend had already promised not to say anything. “You’re the only person who knows about this, and I wanna keep it that way.”

“You didn’t tell Marty?”

“You think he would’ve left if I had?” She had contemplated it about a dozen times, but it had just never seemed like the right time or place. And as much as she hadn’t wanted him to leave, she didn’t want him to stay just because of her, either, because of her and her stupid knocked-up drama. “Just don’t tell anyone, okay? Not Michael, not Marty, not Kyle.”

“No, I promise I won’t say a word,” Tess vowed. “But when are you gonna tell Michael?”

“I don’t know, Tess,” she snapped. “I haven’t thought that far ahead.”

“Okay. Sorry,” Tess apologized. “I really am sorry. I don’t mean to sound pushy.”

Maria sighed tearfully. How had this happened? She had woken up on Valentine’s Day, thinking it was going to be a great day. And it had been. But then Isabel had come back, kid already in the womb, and then Michael had become daddy dearest, and now it was happening to her, too . . . and she felt like she couldn’t handle any of it.

“I’m sorry this screwed things up for you and Kyle,” she apologized. “I didn’t know--”

“Oh my god, that’s so not even what’s important right now,” Tess assured her. “I don’t even want you to worry about that.”

“But I feel bad, ‘cause you guys had a fight,” Maria whimpered. She didn’t want her life to be getting in the way of Tess’s. “Why’d you lie to him about the test anyway?”

“Because . . . I knew it was yours,” Tess answered slowly. “And I knew if you weren’t telling me about it, you were trying to keep it a secret. So I did what any best friend would do. I covered your ass.”

Maria grunted. “Fat ass.”

“No!”

“Well, it’s gonna be.” She was going to be fat all over. And that was just about the best thing that was going to happen to her now.

“Actually, it’s gonna be your stomach more than anything . . .”

Maria shot her a warning look.

“Shutting up. Shutting up now,” Tess said quickly. “But really, Maria . . .”

“I wish I could be happy about this,” Maria cut in. Maybe if she and Michael had still been together, it wouldn’t have been as bad. It still wouldn’t have been good, though. “God, I haven’t even finished college yet!” she wailed. “This is exactly what I didn’t want for myself.”

“Well, it definitely wasn’t planned,” Tess acknowledged. “But that doesn’t mean it’s not a miracle.”

A miracle? Maria had a hard time feeling as though anything about this were miraculous.

“You and Michael made a baby, Maria. You made life.”

“Yeah, well, he also ‘made life’ with Isabel Evans,” she pointed out.

“Well, just forget about her,” Tess suggested. “She isn’t you.”

“Yeah, but who’s living in his apartment right now? Who has her baby’s father at her beck and call? Oh, I know it’s her.”

“Look, Maria . . .” Tess turned to face her directly. She took both Maria’s hands in her own and held them supportively. “I’m not gonna lie: This is probably gonna test you,” she came right out and said. “Physically, emotionally, financially . . . it’s probably not gonna be easy. And did your entire life just change? Yeah, it did.”

Is this supposed to make me feel better? Maria wondered. Because it wasn’t.

“But I know you, and I know there’s nothing you can’t do.” Tess smiled tearfully. “You can do this. And like it or not, you’re gonna have me beside you the whole time. I’m not going anywhere.”

Maria sighed. “Thank you,” she said. “Really, Tess, thank you for everything.” A lesser friend wouldn’t have pretended to be the owner of that test. She felt so much better now that somebody else knew. “But I’m still so scared,” she cried. “I don’t wanna have a baby. Not now. Not even with Michael.”

“Life has a way of surprising you sometimes,” Tess said.

She grunted. “Surprise.” This wasn’t like a surprise birthday party, though. That was fun and much less life-changing.

“Come here.” Tess wrapped an arm around her, and Maria leaned over, resting her head on her best friend’s shoulder. She kept hoping she’d wake up and find out it was all just a bad dream . . . but she knew that wasn’t going to happen. She was already awake. Wide awake.








TBC . . .

-April
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LOVE IS MICHAEL AND MARIA.
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April
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Part 65

Post by April »

Hey, everyone. So you know how I kept hinting about jaw-drop moments and ball rollingness? That's what that last part was. I couldn't wait to post that part. Your reactions certainly didn't disappoint! :lol:

Karin:
OH MY GOD :o
I was hoping to get that reaction!

nibbles:
Ok, definite ball rolling. Came right out of left field and rolled right over me. I was not expecting that. At all. I totally thought it was Tess who was up the duffster.
Yeah, I wanted there to be a bit of a mislead and fool some people into thinking Tess was . . . up the duffster? :lol: What's a duffster? I've never heard that before. :lol:

Alison:
So anyway, now Isabel and Maria are going to be on an even playing field. Both preggers to Michael, except one of them cheated on him and the other is the love of his life. Things are looking up! Well, as much as things can look up in the 521 universe at the moment.
Well, this recent development does definitely change things. It might be the way out of the angst tunnel. Or it might not. :?
And how awesome is Tess? She didn't cave even when Kyle yelled at her and she could have just told him the truth, all for Maria's sake.
I know, I wish I had a friend like that!

Leila:
Fuck me...one of the best twists I read in a story.
Thanks! You know, I usually try to stay away from pregnancies to create drama, but not with this fic! With this fic, I think it works.
Isabitch striked again. tess wasn't smart. She shouldn't have asked Isabel about pregnancies. Isabel is too smart to not make a connection. Though it was the wrong conclusion but even that will cause some havoc...I love this.
Oh, yeah. Isabel's going to figure it out, and that could potentially be disastrous.

Krista:
I always thought Maria's jealousy over Michael's life with Isabel was unfounded. There's nothing that says you have to be one big happy family because you have a kid together. My parents hate each other, and I still see both of them. I think I'm even more pissed off at Maria for her weird logic. Thanks April. ha.
You're welcome. :lol: Honestly, you haven't seen the last of Maria's "weird logic" yet. :?

Ginger:
And God, Michael must have some seriously strong stroking ability here...Jeeeeze...right through or around those condoms...holy crap.
:lol: I think he probably wasn't wearing condoms. Bad boy.

Now I have to give you kudos: I read your guys' feedback pretty much as it's posted (it brightens my day), and you were the first person on either board I post to mention anything about the test being Maria's. When I read your "can you imagine if the test was Maria's?" I was like "Oh my god, it is!" :lol:

killjoy:
I always did say I HATED this 'ohh I'm just going to lay around and cry and feel sorry for myself'Maria was getting on my nerves....but...if she had messed up pregnant hormones pulling her strings than I might cut her some slack on her not fighting for Michael...but not much of slack.
Well, I appreciate you cutting her some slack. She's got crazy life drama going on right now. Honestly, if I were her, I'd probably just lay in bed all day and eat ice cream and do nothing else.

Nove:
OMG!! You are friggin amazing April!! I literally had my mouth wide open while reading it when it was revealed. Wow!! Genius!! You are so smart and clever!!! Best twist ever!! I never see any of it coming. You can still do that to us 64 parts in. That's talent.
Aw, thank you so much! I was really worried that this part wasn't going to surprise anyone. You guys are all pretty perceptive readers. But I'm glad it came as a shock to a lot of you!
I miss Marty!! He's coming back right?
I don't know, possibly. One thing's for sure: this was a really bad time for him to leave.

Sarah:
Oh my fuckity fuck, that twist was the most awesome part that ever awesomed!
Fuckity fuck? Awesomed? :lol: I like your vocabulary. It makes me giggle.

Trixie:
I knew Tess was acting very suspiciously, but it was to cover up for her BFF! Tess Harding is one fantastic chick.
She most definitely is. She's Maria's rock right now.
Maria doesn't want to tell Michael because she feels that Michael has already set up a cozy home with his bitchy manipulative ex. I don’t blame her for freaking out. It’s the scariest thing, especially since they are broken up, he’s living with Isabel, she’s not out of college, and she is mentally, emotionally, financially unprepared to handle the responsibilities of a child. She was scared of even being a stepmom to Michael and Isabel’s kid, so to have a child of her own, ON her own is truly terrifying.
Yeah, I think you nailed it right on the head here. It would be different if she and Michael were still together and Isabel hadn't come back to town. But even then, she'd still be freaking out. I mean, this is the girl who, for the first third of this fic, freeloaded off of Michael and slept around with losers and basically only cared about throwing parties and having a good time. And now she's pregnant. That's a big deal.

lilah:
Anyway so I think Isabel also cheated on Alex, so there's a third guy somewhere in the mix and HE'S actually her baby's dad.
That's definitely a plausible theory, but I'll just set the record straight right now: There was no third guy.

Eva:
I can see why Maria wants to hide it from her friends and from Michael. But it is absolutely no good idea. And it's not going to last long either. Not now when Isabel has told Kyle she thinks Tess is pregnant.
Tess definitely made a mistake in asking Isabel about pregnancy--she was a little freaked out herself and not thinking too clearly. With Isabel's suspicisions aroused, this entire thing could blow up in Tess and Maria's faces before Maria even gets the chance to tell Michael.

Sara:
I can't believe Maria is pregnant....wow, curve ball. I imagined the test was Maria's at first but then with Tess saying it was hers, I didn't think twice about her lying for Maria. WOW.
Good, I'm glad it came as a surprise. When I was originally making my general plan for this story, I didn't intend to make Maria pregnant, but then I realized the possibilities for drama and storytelling are way bigger and better if she is. ;)

Christina:
Can you just imagine how pissed off Izzie will be when she finds out Maria is pregnant with Michael's actual baby.
Inside she'll be pissed off, but outside she'll be very calm and collected.
I imagine this will be one hell of a shock when he finds out about Maria. Believing to be the father of two up and coming children...
And he's just a 21 year old guy. :(



Oh, thank you so much for the feedback, everyone! That was probably the biggest twist of the story, but there is a lot more really dramatic stuff to come, and some of it's going to get pretty damn controversial. So keep the feedback coming! And anyone who's lurking should definitely come out of lurkdom and join the discussion, because there are some intense parts coming up, if I do say so myself. ;)








Part 65








Max was just about to go to sleep that night when he heard and impatient knocking on his door. It was probably either Roger or Liz. He hoped to God it was Liz.

He answered the door shirtless, wearing only drawstring sweatpants. He smiled when he saw Liz. Her eyes immediately zoned in on his chest, but it didn’t take her long to look him in the face.

“I cashed the check,” she announced.

“Already?” He was surprised. “I thought you’d at least wait a few days until you caved.”

“I went to turn on the TV until I remembered I didn’t have one,” she explained. “I need a TV. That’s what single girls like me do for fun.”

“That’s not all you do.” He grinned, wishing she’d throw him down on the floor and ride him until they both came.

She ignored that remark, brushed past him and stepped inside his dark suite. “I’m gonna pay you back every penny when I can,” she said. “It’s a loan, nothing more.”

“It’s not a loan; it’s a gift,” Max corrected, shutting the door. “Just take it. It’s just money.” The Evans Hotel company wasn’t exactly basking in profits anymore, but he still had enough money to give her.

“It’s not just money, not to you,” she said. “I know you, Max. Your money is your power. It’s what allows you to be the puppet-master in everyone’s lives.”

He smiled, taking that as a sort of compliment. “You really think I’m the puppet-master?” Awesome, he’d beat out Isabel for that title.

Liz rolled her eyes.

“Oh, come on, lighten up,” he urged.

“I don’t wanna be . . . under your control,” she explained. “I don’t wanna be dependent on you.”

He didn’t want that, either. He’d nearly ruined her by controlling her. He liked the Liz who wanted him but didn’t need him. “Spending my money won’t make you dependent on me,” he assured her. “I took my dad’s money for years. You think I was ever dependent on him?”

“Uh, considering the fact that he paid for your penthouse, your cars, your clothes, your food, your hookers . . . yeah,” Liz replied, “I’d say you were dependent on him.”

He shrugged, admitting that much. “Fair enough. But I’m not anymore.”

“Because he died.”

“Then maybe that’s your answer. Just off me, do the world a favor,” he joked. “No?”

“No. And FYI, you’re still dependent on him, Max. Whose company are you running these days?”

“It’s my company.”

“But it wasn’t always.”

The girl had a point. He had to give her that much. He hated the thought of his father being the puppet-master to the puppet-master, even from beyond the grave.

“If you really wanna repay me . . .” He trailed off and let his eyes roam over her hungrily.

“If the next words out of your mouth have anything to do with sex, I’m leaving,” she told him.

“And if I just shut up?” he asked. “Then will you stay?”

She looked nervous at the idea of staying, but she seemed reluctant to go. “Maybe,” she said. “I don’t have anything to eat in my apartment.”

“I can feed you,” he offered.

Her eyes bulged.

“Food. I can feed you food,” he elaborated. Although if she wanted semen . . . “You dirty girl.”

“Max . . .”

He traipsed into his kitchen and picked up his phone. “How does lasagna sound?” He sure as hell wasn’t going to cook it himself, but he had a twenty-four hour five-star chef on duty downstairs in his hotel’s restaurant at all times. He could order room service.

“Fine,” she said. “Hey, Max?”

He paused as he was dialing the number.

“Did you mean what you said the other day, when you said you love me?”

He still couldn’t believe he’d said those words out loud. “Yeah, I did,” he replied.

She nodded slowly, looking away.

“You don’t have to say it,” he told her. “I know you love me, too.”

She looked up at him and blushed just slightly. Even in the darkness, he could see it covering her cheeks. He smiled and dialed the number.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria woke up the next morning, surprised that she had even managed to fall asleep. She couldn’t remember getting to the bed. She had a feeling Tess had somehow managed to get her there. Best friend ever.

Maria slowly opened her eyes. Immediately, she thought about the pregnancy. She couldn’t think about anything else. Hell, she’d dreamt about it, about looking at herself in the mirror and seeing a big, round belly just like Isabel’s. It hadn’t been a good dream.

She sat up and ran one hand through her hair. She felt horrible, and not just emotionally horrible. She felt . . . sick. Like nauseous. Wonderful.

She thought she could contain it at first, but it quickly overcame her. She clasped one hand to her mouth and hurled herself out of bed before she . . . well, hurled.

She ran into the bathroom, shut the door, and bent down in front of the toilet. She lifted the lid just in time and lurched forward, throwing up almost violently. It burned her throat and caused her breath to come in heavy, ragged pants. She felt miserable.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tess stood in the kitchen making scrambled eggs, cringing as she heard the sounds coming from the bathroom. Good old morning sickness. Maria was experiencing it already. Poor Maria.

Tess was moving her eggs around in the frying pan with a spatula when Maria came out of the bathroom, looking like a dead person. Her hair was tossed all about, and she looked as though she were about to toss her cookies again any minute.

“Hey,” Tess greeted. “Rough morning?”

Maria just groaned and slumped against the refrigerator.

“Is this the first morning sickness you’ve had?” Tess asked, turning down the heat on the stove burner.

“Yeah.”

“Then here.” Tess handed Maria a glass of orange juice she had poured for herself.

Maria shook her head. “No, I don’t--”

“If you’re vomiting, you can get dehydrated really easily. You need fluids.” Tess held out the juice for her again. This time Maria took the glass and took a small sip. Tess lifted the scrambled eggs out of the frying pan with the spatula and set them down on a plate. “Looks un-fun,” she remarked. “You know, the . . . up-chucking.”

“Yeah, it is. I can’t be more than a month along. Isn’t it kinda soon to be puking my guts out?”

“Not really,” Tess said. “I did some research last night. A lot of women start to experience morning sickness as early as the fourth week, and usually it doesn’t subside until around the sixteenth week; but for a lot of women, it doesn’t subside at all. It just continues. Oh, and sometimes it’s not just in the morning. It’s all-day nausea, pretty much.”

Maria looked at her in horror. “Thanks,” she said sarcastically, “I feel so much better now.”

“Sorry,” Tess apologized. She had to stop being so blunt about all aspects of this pregnancy. “I just want you to be informed.”

Maria nodded, but suddenly, she looked repulsed. She made a face, wrinkling up her nose, backing out of the kitchen.

“What?” Tess asked.

“Those eggs . . .” She covered her nose and mouth with her hand.

“Oh. Want some?” Tess held up a plate.

“No, no,” Maria replied quickly.

“Oh, heightened sense of smell. Got it,” Tess registered. “Well, more for me then.” She shrugged and used the spatula to put the remainder of the eggs on her plate. “I could cook you something else,” she offered. “Waffles?” She waited for Maria to answer, but all she got was silence. She glanced over her shoulder, and she saw how sad Maria looked. Sad and lost and confused.

“I don’t know if I can do this, Tess,” she whispered almost inaudibly.

Tess opened her mouth to assure her that she could, but before she could get a word out, a knock on the door interrupted.

Maria tensed. “Who do you think that is?”

“I don’t know.” Tess wasn’t expecting anyone. “I’ll get rid of them.” She turned off the stove and traipsed towards the front door. When she opened the door, she came face to face with Kyle, and he looked pissed. “Hey,” she said, surprised to see him. “What’re you doing here?” Whatever it was, judging by the look on his face, it wasn’t anything good.

“I laid awake all night, running through every possible scenario in my head,” he started off, “and now I need you to tell me the truth, for once and for all. Can you do that?”

She didn’t understand. “The truth . . . what?”

“Are you pregnant?” he asked forcefully. “Hey, Maria.”

“Hey,” Maria returned, averting her eyes.

Tess sighed heavily. Having this conversation with Kyle was bad enough. Having it in front of the girl who actually was pregnant . . . way worse. “I thought we talked about this, Kyle.”

“Well, we’re talking about it again. Are you?”

She shook her head, so angry with him in that moment. He wasn’t letting up. Why couldn’t he just trust that she was telling him the truth? “I told you, no,” she answered. “How many times do I have to say it?”

“How come Isabel knocked on my door yesterday to congratulate me on bein’ a dad?” he asked. “Am I a dad?”

“I just told you, no!” she yelled. “God! Freaking Isabel.”

“Then how come you were asking her about pregnancy symptoms?”

She’d done that because she’d been wondering if Maria was pregnant. She never should have asked Isabel. She should have known that bitch couldn’t keep her mouth shut. “I was just wondering,” she insisted. “Burn me at the stake! Is curiosity the eighth deadly sin?”

“You guys . . .” Maria piped up.

“No, Maria, you don’t have to say anything,” Tess assured her. She was willing to pretend that test had been hers as long as she had to. Or until Maria decided to tell Michael, at least. “If Kyle doesn’t trust me, that’s his problem.”

“Oh, ‘cause you’ve given me so many reasons to trust you lately,” Kyle bit out. “Kiss with Max, anyone? Or how ‘bout friends with benefits?”

Tess rolled her eyes. He was never going to forget that. Never ever.

“Here.” Kyle opened his backpack and pulled out a pregnancy test. He handed it to her and said, “You can take this right here, right now. Show it to me. Then I’ll trust what you’re saying.”

She stared down at the test in his hand for a moment, then into his eyes. He reminded her of Michael in that moment, of the Michael who had barged into her apartment not long ago claiming that they were no longer friends. She knew he didn’t mean to be so angry, but he was. And knowing that he was angry at her really hurt. She felt like crying, but she had to be strong for Maria.

She seized the test from him and marched towards the bathroom. “I can’t believe you don’t believe me,” she muttered, throwing herself inside and slamming the door shut. She leaned back against the door and sighed in distress. She’d pee on a stick if that was what it took, but she hated that she’d given Kyle reasons to distrust her.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“You probably think I’m bein’ a jerk.”

Maria sat down next to Kyle on the couch as they waited for Tess to come out of the bathroom. “You could never be a jerk, Kyle,” she assured him. Even on his worst day, Kyle was still technically a nice guy. “But yeah, you were . . . kinda mean, throwing the whole Max kiss back in her face.”

“I’m just really on-edge right now,” Kyle admitted.

“Yeah, I get that.” She couldn’t remember ever being so on-edge in her life. She felt as though any little thing could just set her off, make her erupt like a volcano. She felt horrible about the drama her pregnancy was causing Tess and Kyle, too. Especially Tess.

“She’s telling you the truth, you know,” she said. “She’s not pregnant.” She wished she could say the same for herself. “Be relieved.”

“I’ll be relieved when I see the test.”

She nodded. Those tests were horrible looking things, so objective and impersonal. “Kyle,” she said softly. “What if she was pregnant? What if she was having your baby? Would you just . . . hate that?”

For a moment, Kyle looked as though he wanted to say yes, but he didn’t. “No, of course not,” he replied. “I could never hate my own kid. But I wouldn’t exactly be thrilled, either. I’m not ready to be a dad, and I doubt Tess is ready to be a mom. I just think we’re too young, and things are too uncertain between us, and I’m too much of a spaz. If it happened, we’d deal, but I kinda feel like it would screw up both our lives.” He shrugged. “That’s just . . . how I feel.”

“Yeah.” She felt that way, too.

Tess came out of the bathroom a moment later, looking furious. “Here’s the test Kyle. Here’s the fucking test!” She threw the test down on his lap and asked, “Now do you believe me?”

Kyle picked up the test and saw the negative result. He looked ashamed of himself for doubting. “I’m sorry,” he apologized. “I’m sorry I had to be so forceful. But do you understand where I was coming from?”

“No, I don’t understand. You chose to believe Isabel, the known liar, over me, the girl you claim to love.”

Kyle looked down at the test again, then handed it back to her. “I’m really sorry,” he apologized again, rising to his feet. “I really am.” He left without another word, and Maria allowed her guilt to overcome her. This wasn’t fair to either of them.

“I should be the one who’s sorry,” she said. “This is all my fault.”

“What? No, this isn’t . . . none of this is your fault,” Tess assured her.

“Sure it is. If you hadn’t been covering for me, you and Kyle would probably be back in the honeymoon phase by now.”

Tess shook her head doubtfully and sat down on the arm of the couch. “No, we wouldn’t,” she said. “And you didn’t ask me to cover for you. I did that all on my own.”

Maria thought about it for a moment and decided, “You can tell Kyle, if you want to. You can tell him about me.”

“No way,” Tess said without hesitating. “You are my best friend, and I made a promise to you. I’m not telling him anything.”

“But this whole pregnancy secret is tearing you guys apart.”

“We were torn apart long before this,” Tess pointed out. “Look, by telling Kyle, I’d basically be telling Michael. Those guys are best friends, and they chatter like little schoolgirls. Are you really ready for Michael to know?”

No, she thought. I’m not. She had no idea how she was going to tell him or how he was going to react . . . and not knowing scared the hell out of her.

“Didn’t think so,” Tess said, recognizing her mute response as a ‘no.’

“I’m sorry, Tess,” she apologized.

“Don’t worry about it. And don’t worry about me. I’m gonna be fine. Just focus on you, okay?”

Maria didn’t feel good about any of this. She felt like a coward.

“Okay.” Tess glanced over at the front door Kyle had just walked out of and took in a shaky breath. Maria could tell this whole thing was affecting her more than she cared to admit.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Michael nervously showed Isabel the walk-in hallway closet he had converted into their baby’s nursery that day. By all accounts, it looked really good. He’d painted the walls a shade of baby blue, and he’d been able to take out the lower shelves and fit a crib, a rocking chair, and a lamp in there. A baby monitor was attached to the rear end of the crib, and a baby blanket was draped over the back of the rocking chair. Michael had hung the picture he had recently painted of Isabel on the back wall. He hung an airplane mobile above the crib and put beige carpet down on the closet floor. Overall, it was a cozy atmosphere. A bit too cozy. Even though there was storage space on the upper shelves, it was a cramped space to say the least.

“Oh my god, Michael,” Isabel gasped in astonishment. “This is so adorable. Did you do all this?”

“Yeah. Well, Kyle helped,” he admitted. They had gone out and purchased all the paint and supplies the other day, and they had put it together that morning while Isabel had been asleep. “Oh, don’t touch that,” he said as she reached out to touch the wall. “The paint’s still wet.”

“Oh, okay.” She stood in the middle of the closet—well, the nursery now—and looked around, her eyes sparkling as she took it all in. “This is incredible.”

Michael shrugged. “Not really. It’s a closet.”

“Not anymore.” She couldn’t seem to stop smiling. “Oh, thank you.” She threw her arms around him and hugged him. “Thank you for being such an amazing guy. And an amazing father to your son. He’s gonna love you.”

He felt his heart start to flutter nervously. “I hope.” He gently released her from the hug and brushed past her to go to the crib. He looked down into it. It was empty now, but in a few weeks, there would be a bouncing baby boy in there. His baby boy. Their baby boy. “I realize this is too small,” he said, “way too small. And there’s no window, no plug-ins. I had to drag the lamp cord out into the hallway. But hopefully it’ll do until we get a bigger place.”

“Like a house?” she asked.

“Well, just something bigger than a one-bedroom apartment.” He wasn’t sure if he was ready to be a homeowner yet or not. That was a huge deal. Although he supposed being a father was a bigger deal.

“I’ve actually been looking online at some houses for sale in the area,” Isabel said. “There’s this real nice one that’s having an open-house tomorrow. I was planning on going to check it out if you wanna go with me.”

“Uh . . .” He had no class, and he didn’t have to work. He had no reason not to go with her. “Yeah, sure.” It was probably best that he took an active role in the home-buying process, if that was indeed what they were doing.

“Okay, good,” she said. “You’re the best.” She gave him a kiss on the cheek and left the closet . . . the nursery. Whichever.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“You’re the best best friend, you know that?” Maria told Tess in all sincerity as they sat in the doctor’s office. “I mean, you’re like the best best friend a girl could ask for.” Tess had taken Maria to see her OBGYN, because Maria didn’t have an OBGYN of her own. She felt so stupid for that.

“It’s no problem,” Tess assured her.

“I feel so much better knowing you’re here.”

“Well, I know I’m a poor substitute for Michael, but I try my best.” Tess smiled.

“Honestly, right now, I’m glad Michael doesn’t know,” Maria admitted. “One crisis at a time.”

Tess shook her head. “This isn’t a crisis. It’s a . . . life-altering event.”

Maria gave her a look. “Otherwise known as . . .”

“Okay, but a crisis is, like a bad thing. This is more unexpected than bad.”

Maria appreciated her friend’s attempts to lighten the situation, but . . . there was nothing light about it. “It’s pretty bad, Tess,” she insisted. “Must I remind you of this morning’s puke-fest?”

“No, you mustn’t.” The door to the room opened, and a middle-aged male doctor came in with a laptop computer in his hands.

“Oh, hi, doctor,” Tess greeted.

“This is your OBGYN?” Maria whispered in horror. She’d been expecting a woman.

Tess shook her head. “I think she’s on vacation.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Mrs. DeLuca,” the doctor said to Tess.

“Um . . . actually, that’s me,” Maria informed him. “And it’s Ms. DeLuca. I’m not . . . I’m not married.” She would have felt a lot better with a ring on her finger.

“My mistake,” the doctor said, sitting down at the desk in the corner. He opened the laptop, clicked around for a moment, and pulled up what looked like an electronic patient file. Maria had answered a lot of questions for the nurse already. The doctor looked over all the information she had given and said, “I’m Dr. Carlson. It’s nice to meet you,” without glancing away from the screen.

“Hi,” Maria said, feeling nervous. “Oh, this is my friend Tess. She’s here for moral support.”

“It’s nice to meet you, too.” Dr. Carlson finally looked away from the screen and motioned towards the examination table. “Why don’t you hop on up there?” he told Maria.

“Okay.” She climbed onto the table, feeling so . . . fat.

“So you’re here today about a possible pregnancy. Is that right?” the doctor asked.

“Possible, yeah,” she echoed. “Or . . . definite, maybe. I was just hoping I could get some verification on it. Or feel free to tell me I’m wrong. I’d love to be wrong.”

The doctor smiled good-naturedly. “What leads you to suspect you’re pregnant?” he asked.

“Well . . . I had a lot of sex.”

Dr. Carlson raised his eyebrows at that.

“Oh, I think he means, like, the home pregnancy test,” Tess piped up.

“Oh, right.” She felt embarrassed. “I took a test at home the other day and it came back positive. And I’m a week late with my period, and I have all these symptoms. Like, I was nauseous this morning, and I’ve been having some food cravings.” She waited a moment, then added, “And my boobs are kinda sore.”

“What boobs?” Tess joked.

Maria actually managed to laugh a little. “Shut up.”

“Well, it would certainly seem that you’re pregnant, judging by everything you just described,” Dr. Carlson said. “But we can confirm things for you, and then we can take it from there.”

Maria nodded. That sounded nice and structured. “Okay,” she said. “Are you gonna give me an ultrasound?”

“I can. How far along do you suspect you are?”

“Um . . . I think about four weeks, probably,” she replied. She’d managed to do the math, dating it back to the last time she’d had her period. Four weeks seemed about right.

“Okay, well, an ultrasound at four weeks isn’t going to show much,” Dr. Carlson explained. “We’ll see the gestational sac, but not much else. I probably won’t be able to tell you yet how far into this pregnancy you are or give you an estimated date of conception yet, but I will be able to either confirm or deny that you’re pregnant, based on what the ultrasound shows us.”

“Good,” she said. “That’s really all I want.”

“Okay, then we’ll go ahead and do that today.” Dr. Carlson sat down in front of the computer again and typed some information in. Maria kicked her feet against the examination table, trying to take as many deep, calming breaths as she could. An ultrasound. This was going to be so weird.

“If you are pregnant, do you know who the father is?” Dr. Carlson asked as he typed.

She supposed it was a small miracle that there was no ambiguity there. “Yeah,” she said, picturing Michael. She wondered if he would be happy or devastated when she told him about this.

“That’s good,” Dr. Carlson said. “That’s very good.”

Oh, Michael, she thought, I’ll tell you someday.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Michael accompanied Isabel the next day to the open-house she wanted to go to. Instead of driving there, they walked, and it took a good half an hour. “Are you sure you’re not overdoing it?” he asked her.

“A thirty-minute power-walk is hardly overdoing it,” she assured him. “Besides, moderate exercise is good for pregnant women.”

“Even eight months in?”

“Sure.” She slowed her pace as they approached the corner of 14th and Vine Street and said, “I’ll tell you, though, after I have the baby, I’m gonna take up pole-dancing to get back in shape.”

He laughed.

“I’m serious.”

He stopped laughing. Pole-dancing. Well, that was definitely . . . athletic.

“Ah, here it is,” she announced as they rounded the corner. The house was at the end of a cul-de-sac, white with black ceiling and shutters, two stories tall, very large and well-maintained. There was a big porch out front and a swimming pool in the back. Michael knew immediately that it was out of his price range. “Whoa,” he said. “I can already tell you we can’t afford this.” Which was too bad, because it did look really nice. “What’s it listed at?”

“Two-hundred thousand dollars,” Isabel replied, “but I figure we can offer one-eighty. It’s a buyer’s market, you know.”

He’d heard that, but still . . . “I don’t have a hundred and eighty thousand dollars.”

“That’s what loans are for.”

“I don’t have a loan.”

“We have to apply for one.”

“And get approved for one.” He wasn’t even sure if they’d get approved. He was a twenty-one year-old guy with a part-time job that paid decently. He was a twenty-one year-old guy with a lot of scholarships. But he was also a twenty-one year-old guy with a baby on the way. He couldn’t imagine any banks being very enthused to give him such a substantial loan. “Look, Isabel,” he said, “we can’t get this house.”

She pouted. “You haven’t even looked at it. Come on.” She grabbed his hand and pulled him down the sidewalk towards the house. “You know,” she said, “your parents are pretty comfortably upper-middle class. Have you ever thought about asking them for money?”

“Well, I haven’t had to since I got my apartment.” He sort of enjoyed the feeling of being financially independent. “But I guess they paid for that paternity test.”

“Well, I’m sure they’d be willing to help with a house, too, unlike my dead dad and my stupid brother.”

Almost as if on cue, Max’s voice rang out in the air. “Who you calling stupid?”

Both Isabel and Michael turned around. He was behind them, climbing of a limo.

“Okay, that’s just creepy,” Isabel remarked. “What’re you doing here?”

He gestured toward the home. “Open-house. You two thinkin’ about buying this place?”

“Yes,” Isabel replied at the same time Michael answered, “No.”

“Huh, too bad, ‘cause I wanna buy this place, and I actually have money.” Max shrugged. “What, you didn’t think I was gonna live in that hotel forever, did you?”

“Actually, yeah,” Isabel admitted.

Max chuckled. “I’m just kidding. I don’t want this place. It’s way too small.”

“You know, they say guys who buy big houses are like guys who buy big cars,” Isabel said. “Compensating for something.”

“Oh-ho, funny.” Max didn’t laugh. “Say, why don’t you guys just get a two-bedroom apartment? It’d be a hell of a lot cheaper.”

Isabel made a face. “No.”

“He’s right,” Michael piped up again. He hated agreeing with Max, but he had to agree on this. “We can’t afford this house.”

Isabel looked sorely disappointed.

“Sorry,” he told her. “What’re you doing here, Max?”

“Just tracking down some guests for my party.” He grinned.

“You’re throwing a party? God, do you ever work?” Isabel spat.

“All the time, unlike you,” Max retorted. “It’s a party for the new money of Santa Fe. Very young, very hip.”

“Hmm.” Isabel nodded slowly. “That party was my idea.”

“Yeah, I guess it was. Oh, I’d invite you, but unwed pregnant bitch isn’t exactly the image my company’s aiming for.” He shrugged again. “See you guys around,” he said, traipsing past them towards the open-house.

Isabel sighed heavily and lamented, “He’s so much like my dad.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria couldn’t sleep that night, so she went out into the living room and took out every old family videotape she owned. She watched one right after another. Tess was in a lot of them, but it was mostly her and Marty.

As the sun started to rise, Maria popped in a tape marked Christmas ’91. She sat on the floor, huddled up under her blanket, and watched the younger versions of her and her brother running around their living room back home in Roswell. That house was still technically their home, but neither of them lived there anymore, and Amy barely lived there anymore ever since she and Ed had hooked up. It wasn’t the house that was so affecting, though.

“Here we are, Christmas day, 1991,” Amy’s recorded voice said. She was the one filming everything. She showed the tree and all the unopened presents under the tree. “We just finished opening gifts, and now we’re gonna head to Grandma’s for awhile.” All of a sudden she darted towards eight year-old Marty, who was in the corner playing with some of his new presents. “Oh, Marty, don’t do that with your G.I. Joes!” she shouted, swatting them out of his hands. “They’re both boys!”

“Mom, come on!” he yelled.

Amy tossed the G.I. Joes aside and continued on with the camera. She met Maria at the bottom of the stairs. Maria had only been four years old at the time. She was still wearing footie pajamas, and her hair was in curlers.

“And here’s Maria,” Amy cooed, kneeling down with the camera. “Say hi, sweetie.”

“Hi.”

“Is that your favorite Christmas present?”


Maria watched in interest as the four-year old version of herself held up a doll, rocking it back and forth in her arms. She remembered that doll. It had been one of her favorite Christmas presents ever. She probably still had it stored away in a box somewhere.

“Is your baby doll your favorite present?” Amy asked again.

Four year-old Maria nodded. “Yeah.”

“Yeah, she’s yours, isn’t she?” her mom said. “She’s your baby.”

Four year-old Maria smiled. “I love her.”

“You do? What’s her name?”

She looked down at her baby doll for a moment, then beamed at the video camera and exclaimed, “Miley!”


The shrill ring of her cell phone snapped Maria out of her memories. She paused the video and picked up her phone. “Hello?”

“Hey, girl, how’s it goin’?” Marty exclaimed at once.

“Marty.” Maria breathed a sigh of relief. It felt so good to hear from him.

“Hey, sorry I wasn’t able to call sooner. It’s been crazy getting settled in here.”

“Do you like it?” she asked, crawling forward to eject the home video from the VCR. She didn’t want to watch anymore. Miley the baby doll. Just perfect.

“Oh my god, I love it,” Marty raved. “The house is even more beautiful than I remember, and Francis and I have already made some new friends, and we joined this club. They gave us these little rainbow badges and--”

“Rainbow?” she cut in.

“Uh-huh. Some gay stereotypes just never get old. Anyway, I’m really loving it here, but I miss you, girly.”

She lay down her back in the middle of the floor, staring up at the ceiling. “I miss you, too,” she said. “So much.” He couldn’t even begin to imagine how much she missed him right now.

“You okay?” he asked.

“Yeah.” She wasn’t, but she thought it was best to lie. He was happy and starting the life he’d always wanted. He didn’t need her problems to weigh him down. “It’s just good to hear your voice.”

“Hmm, same to you. So, what’s going on? What’s happening? What am I missing in the land of enchantment?”

“Oh . . .” She rested one hand atop her stomach. “Nothing really.” Just the whirlwind of drama surrounding his future niece or nephew.

“How come I don’t believe that?” he said. “Come on, it’s been a couple days since I left. Something exciting has to have happened.”

Exciting was . . . one word to use for it. “No, it’s just been the same old stuff,” she practically whispered, feeling herself getting choked up. She barely managed to hold it together. “Nothing new here.” Except there was something new. Very new.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Isabel invited Kyle over to hang out with her and Michael that evening. She wanted to know more about the Valenti-Harding drama. It was better than any soap opera.

“So, what’s new, Kyle?” she asked, bringing him a beer. She plopped down on the couch beside him and joked around a little by setting the beer can down atop her stomach. It was practically a table.

“Are you gonna drink that?” Kyle asked.

“No, silly, it’s for you.” She handed it to him, longing for the days when she could just get plastered again. She missed booze.

“Oh.” Kyle took one small sip, then set the beer down on the coffee table. He didn’t strike Isabel as a big drinker.

“Suit yourself,” she said, twirling her hair around her finger. I so need to get highlights again, she thought. After she gave birth, she was going to look hot again. She looked hot enough now, but she wanted to look smoldering. Michael wouldn’t be able to resist her when she was smoldering.

“Is Michael still in the shower?” Kyle asked.

“Yeah, he’ll probably be in there for awhile,” she replied. “I think sometimes he stands under the water and cries, doesn’t want me to know about it.”

“Oh. How depressing.”

“No, he’s not depressed,” she insisted. “I think he’s looking forward to being a father.” That was stretching the truth a little bit. He was scared to death, as most guys in his position would be. “He put together that little nursery, though. Thanks for helping him with that, by the way.”

“No problem.”

“It’s probably good practice, huh?” She grinned. “I mean, for when you set up your own baby’s nursery. How is Tess, anyway?”

“Uh, not pregnant. That’s how she is,” Kyle replied.

“What?” Isabel made a face. “You don’t believe that, do you?”

“Yeah, she took a test when I was there. She’s not pregnant.”

“Oh.” Then that pretty much settled it. Urine didn’t lie. “Well, I guess you’re off the hook then.”

“Yeah, for once I had good luck.”

“Huh.” Isabel sat up straighter, confused by all this. “That’s really weird. I thought for sure . . .” She trailed off and shook her head. She prided herself on being extremely perceptive and deductive. It seemed odd that she would be so far off. “Usually I’m not wrong about stuff.”

“Well, you must’ve just had an off day,” Kyle reasoned.

“I guess.” Still, she couldn’t shake the feeling that something wasn’t right about this. “But why was she asking me about pregnancy?” she wondered. “There has to be some reason.”

Kyle shrugged. “She said she was just curious.”

“And you believe that?” Kyle was way too gullible for his own good.

“Well, yeah,” he said. “Why else would she ask?”

Isabel shook her head and glanced around the living room. “I don’t know,” she said. “Maybe . . .” She trailed off abruptly when her eyes landed on a picture perched on top the television in the living room. It was a picture she hated and had been dying to get rid of ever since she’d moved in, a picture of Michael, Maria, Kyle, and Tess standing together outside the Fairview apartment complex. Somebody must have taken it for them. Both the guys had their arms around the girls’ midsections, and Tess and Maria were both facing each other, laughing about something.

She narrowed her eyes as she stared at the picture, zooming in towards the center of it. Tess and Maria. Tess and Maria. Best friends until the end. Bitches.

“Maybe you’re right,” she said to Kyle. “She was just curious.” She looked at the picture again, smiling devilishly. Or, she thought, maybe Tess wasn’t the curious one.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria groaned as she walked out of the bathroom. Tess was right. Morning sickness wasn’t just in the morning. At least not for her. She had an afternoon class to get to, but she didn’t feel at all like going. Her stomach was doing back-flips, and all the vomiting was really zapping her energy.

She went into the kitchen and poured herself a glass of water. She tried to drink as much of it as she could, but she was too queasy to drink the whole glass. She poured half of it back down the sink, wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, and sighed heavily. Why did this have to happen to her?

She glanced at the clock on the microwave and groaned again. Her class started in five minutes, and she still had to drive all the way to campus, park, and walk to the building. She was going to have to hurry if she didn’t want to be counted absent.

She grabbed her purse and dashed for the door, holding one hand to her stomach. When she opened the door, she literally crashed into Isabel. What the hell was she doing there? Maria felt her stomach knot up even more. Whatever the reason, it couldn’t be good.

“The nausea’s the worst part, isn’t it?” Isabel said.

Maria tried to contain her reaction. “The worst part of what?”

Isabel smiled. “Pregnancy.”

What the fuck? How does she know? She quickly tried to deny it. “I’m not--”

“Yes, you are,” Isabel interrupted. She sounded as though she had no doubt.

Maria looked away nervously. The girl was like an evil genius, but she wasn’t about to verbally confirm anything. “What do you want, Isabel?”

“I just wanna talk.” Isabel brushed past Maria and made her way inside the apartment, her pregnant belly coming into contact with Maria’s side as she did so. “Come on, you could at least act happy to see me. We pregnant chicks have to stick together.”

Maria shut the front door. “I told you, I’m not--”

“Don’t lie,” Isabel cut in again. “You’re no good at it.”

Maria stared at her in disbelief. How the hell had she figured it out?

“I guess I should say congratulations.” Isabel traipsed into the kitchen and pulled open the refrigerator. “A baby changes everything.” She took out a container of Maria’s rosy applesauce and asked, “Can I?”

“No,” Maria growled.

Isabel shrugged and put the applesauce back in the refrigerator, shutting the door. “You did a good job keeping it a secret,” she went on. “You don’t look any fatter than usual.”

Maria rolled her eyes. Typical Isabel; she just had to throw an insult in there.

“Of course, that’s all gonna change soon. A girl like you might gain forty pounds.” She shrugged. “Whatever. Hey, you wanna know what finally clued me in? Your best friend.”

Maria couldn’t believe that. “She told you?” Tess would never do such a thing.

“No, but you just did.” Isabel grinned, and Maria mentally kicked herself for falling into that trap. There was no denying it now. She’d just accidentally confirmed everything.

“At first I thought it was Tess,” Isabel admitted, “but I should’ve known better. You and Michael probably had way more sex. He’s a machine.” She drummed her fingers against the countertop and tilted her head to the side, asking, “It is Michael’s, right?”

Maria was so tired of people asking her that. It literally couldn’t be anyone else’s. But she was reluctant to give up any more information to Isabel, so she said nothing.

Isabel chuckled. “Mr. Responsible. Not anymore. God, I remember him back in his virgin days. And the night I deflowered him. He was kind of awkward at first, but . . . fast learner.” She grinned smugly and stretched her arms above her head. “I taught him everything he knows.”

“Not everything,” Maria growled, narrowing her eyes at her. She was such a pain in the ass.

“Do you remember when it happened?” Isabel inquired suddenly. “I mean, do you remember the exact night? Or day, whichever.”

Can she be any more intrusive? Maria wondered. “I don’t know yet.”

“It happened to me the night he and I broke up,” she said, trailing her fingers across the countertop, “the night I told him I’d cheated. Our last night together. He slept with me even when he knew what I’d done.”

Maria tensed. Michael had never told her that much of the story. She had a hard time picturing him stooping low enough to have a night of break-up sex.

“I packed up all the things I had stored in his apartment, and I was about to leave. Alex was actually out in the car, waiting. You know, come to think of it, he waited a long time. It wasn’t a quickie.” She shrugged. “Anyway, I stopped and looked at Michael, and I knew he was the greatest guy I’d ever meet. So I ran towards him, threw my arms around him, and kissed him. He acted like he didn’t want it, but he’s a guy. It’s not like he could resist. So we screwed. And it was good. He was on top. He was heartbroken. He wouldn’t even look at me, but when he came, I saw tears in his eyes.”

Maria stared at her, somewhat horrified to hear all this. She could see it happening in her head. Sex between Michael and Isabel wasn’t something she wanted to envision, even though she knew it had happened.

“Best break-up fuck ever,” Isabel bragged. “My guy put it to me good.”

Maria flinched. He wasn’t her guy. Was he?

“Right in our bed.” Isabel closed her eyes as though she were remembering. “You think that’s where he knocked you up, too, the bed? Because if it is, we should start calling it the baby-maker.” She laughed, but Maria didn’t find the joke to be humorous at all. “You know,” Isabel went on, “making the baby’s the easy part. It’s everything else that’s hard. I lied to you just now; the nausea’s not the worst part. Just wait ‘til the contractions start up.”

“You’ve had contractions?” Maria asked curiously.

“Not the real ones. Braxton Hicks. Still sucky. You’ll find that out. The backaches are a bitch, too. Kinda feels like knives.” She grimaced and rubbed the small of her back with one hand. “Never lets up. And the mood swings . . . don’t even get me started on the mood swings. You feel like you’re bipolar sometimes. Not fun. But other than all that, it’s like a walk in the park. You know, if the park was full of hot coals.”

Maria felt the fear of it all start to grip her, but she knew Isabel was saying these things intentionally. It was probably all part of some master plan. “You’re trying to intimidate me,” she recognized.

“I’m trying to inform you,” Isabel insisted. “I wish I’d had someone to inform me. If I had . . . well, let’s just say I’d be wearing my skinny jeans right about now.”

Maria frowned. “What do you mean?”

Isabel sighed heavily and looked down at her stomach thoughtfully. “I considered getting an abortion,” she mumbled. “I mean, I seriously considered it. Because I just thought, ‘I’m not ready for this. This isn’t what I want. I’ll make a terrible mother.’ But Alex convinced me not to have one. He said everything was gonna be okay, and we’d always be together. You see how that turned out.”

It’s just intimidation, Maria reminded herself. But hell, it was working.

“Luckily Michael stepped up, committed himself to being the best damn father he can be. But I guess he’s got another nursery to put together now.”

Maria bristled. If this bitch said one word to him about any of this . . .

“Relax, I won’t tell him,” Isabel promised as if she were reading her mind. “I can keep a secret.”

Maria wasn’t sure she could believe that, but she didn’t really have a choice.

“Besides, I want us to get along,” Isabel added. “We’re both having Michael’s babies. That practically makes us family.”

Hearing that almost made Maria throw up again.

“Oh, I can just see it now,” Isabel kept on, “this year’s Christmas. You me, Michael, and the kids, all gathered around the tree. One big happy family.”

Maria wrinkled her face in disgust. “No.” That wouldn’t be happy at all.

“You can’t see it?”

“No way.”

“That’s too bad. You know who this sucks the most for, though? It’s not you. It’s not me. It’s Michael. Having one kid before you graduate college is tough enough, but having two?” Isabel shook her head. “And with different girls at that. Poor guy. He’s gonna have to drop out of college for sure, so that he can work full-time. It’s not like either of us has a job. And he might never get to pursue his art career now. He could end up working minimum wage crap for the rest of his life. ‘Cause two kids . . . that’s a hefty responsibility.”

The last thing Maria wanted to do was ruin Michael’s life with this. She still loved him.

“He doesn’t deserve this,” Isabel said. “You know he’ll pretend to be happy when you tell him, but inside, he’s gonna die a little more. You’d better be prepared for that. And obviously you’d better be prepared for your entire life to change, ‘cause it’s gonna. Suddenly you’ll have this little person who’s completely dependent on you, this little person with little hands feet and little feet. And if you do anything to let that person down . . . you’re a failure.”

Maria didn’t want that responsibility. She wasn’t a responsible person.

“I don’t know, Maria. I could be wrong. Maybe this will work out really well for you. Maybe you’ll be the world’s best mom. After me, of course.”

World’s best mom? Maria grunted. That would never be her, or Isabel for that matter.

“Are you thinking about having an abortion?” Isabel asked bluntly. “Because every woman does, if the pregnancy’s unplanned. Even if she claims she doesn’t, the thought runs through her mind for at least a split-second. It ran a marathon through my mind, trust me.”

Maria didn’t even know what to say, or if she should say anything at all. Anything she said was something Isabel could possibly use against her if she decided not to keep this a secret.

“It’s too late for me,” Isabel said, “but it’s not too late for you, if that’s what you choose. Hell, if you did it soon enough, Michael wouldn’t even have to know about any of this. Ever. I’m envious. You’ve got a way out. I’m already trapped.”

Trapped. Maria couldn’t imagine a worse feeling than feeling trapped. “I don’t know if that’s what I’m gonna do,” she said. She hadn’t even told her best friend that she was considering it.

“Well, if it is, don’t let anyone make you feel bad about it,” Isabel said. “There’s nothing wrong or sinful about deciding what goes on inside your own body. Feminism 101.”

Maria wanted to believe that, but she knew it was so much more complicated.

“Look, for what it’s worth . . . I love my son already,” Isabel said, “more than anything else in the world. But if I could go back and make a different decision . . . I probably would.”

That was a startling admission, one that only served to make Maria feel more unsettled. She didn’t want to be anything like Isabel Evans.

“Good talk,” Isabel said, heading for the door. She gave Maria a pat on the back and said, “Congratulations” before walking out the door.

Maria felt her stomach quench tightly again when she was gone. She wasn’t sure if it was because of what she’d said or just because of the morning sickness. Either way, it sent her bolting for the bathroom again.

She hated this.









TBC . . .

-April
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LOVE IS MICHAEL AND MARIA.
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April
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Part 66

Post by April »

Hey, guys! One last pimp for the Support Stacie author auction and my chat, info listed in my sig. ;)

Alison:
Tell you what, I frigging loved Max popping up at the open house inspection. Right on, Max. Right on. Every time that boy opens his mouth in the presence of Isabel, he redeems himself a little bit.
Yeah, he's easiest to tolerate when he's insulting his sister. ;)
You know what I'd love? If Isabel had the baby and it was black.
Oh my god, this made me laugh so hard when I read it. :lol: I guess you could hope it's Hispanic like Jesse Ramirez. But I've never written Jesse in a fic before, and I'm not about to start now.

Leila:
I love Isabel. The evil within her is my new crush. Seriously, you couldn't tell if she was honest or manipulating. It could be both. I love how Isabel can turn every situation to her advanteage. I love the talk between them.
Isabel knows what she wants, and she's not going to let Maria get in the way of that. I'm glad you enjoyed that talk between the two of them. It was a long time coming, and I have to say, I think it was intense.

Eva:
I hope Maria doesn't fall for her intimidations. She would regret it for the rest of her life. Maria has to tell Michael. As hard as the message is. She just has to.
Maria knows Isabel was trying to intimidate her. But even though she knows that, the whole conversation still affected her. But you're right, she just has to tell Michael.

Sara:
Where is our happiness???? Any of it? This is all depressing and sad and its making me miserable. BOOOOOO! HAPPINESS RULES!! Isabel is a whore!
That's why I gave you lots of happier times at the beginning of the fic, because it's absolutely miserable right now.
I am shocked you didn't give Maria an ounce of spine right then. I would have given everything I have to have Maria slap Isabel so hard across the face.
I know, that would've been awesome, but Maria's just not up to fighting with Isabel right now. She's too flustered and sad and confused to go tow to tow with her.

Ginger:
If Maria aborts her baby then Isabelle thinks she is insured of Michael's support, if Maria doesn't abort it's obvious who Michael will choose to spend his life with, if Maria wants him. Not that he will turn his back on Isabelle's child, if it's his, but he definitely will turn his back on Isabelle. God this web just keeps getting thicker and thicker. What a mess!!!
It just keeps getting more and more screwed up, doesn't it? But you're right, Michael would never turn his back on his child, but if he and Maria reconciled, he would turn his back on Isabel.

nibbles:
Oh Isabel, how I hate thee. Let me count the ways.

1. She broke up Michael and Maria (For that alone she will BURN IN HELL.)
2. She cheated on Michael and broke his heart.
3. She's evil.
4. She's pregnant.
5. She's lying about Michael being the father.
6. She broke up Michael and Maria.
7. She's moved into Michael's apartment and his bed.
8. She made Michael paint her.
9. She's driving a wedge between Michael and his friends.
10. She's manipulating Maria while she's at her lowest and most vulnerable.
11. She's manipulating Michael while he's at his lowest and most vulnerable.
12. She's coercing him into buying her a house despite the fact that he's a 21 year old student.
13. Her brother is Max and she's making me like him.
14. She broke up Michael and Maria.
15. She broke up Michael and Maria.
Wow, that's a long list! She also caused controversy between Tess and Kyle when she went and congratulated him on being a father. You'd better add that one to the list.
Seriously, she's evil. The craziest, evilest thing about her is that she wants Michael. She seems to have feelings for him.
Yes! She does have feelings for him. It's gonna get kind of creepy as you see her feelings start to come out more and more.

Nove:
So as dysfunctional as their relationship is. I'm happy Liz and Max are talking. At the moment they seem the least complicated which is saying a lot since they have one messed up relationship.
I know, right? They're the ones that are actually (sort of) together right now, and they're kind of taking a step back from everyone else's drama to focus on themselves.
She's such a quintessential villain. Think villain in the dictionary and I swear she would pop up. My goodness. You have crafted and personified the devil so very well.
She is the devil, isn't she? She's a pregnant devil. Even though she's a villain, though, I've come to the conclusion that she's the best character I've ever constructed. Not in terms of likability, obviously, but in other ways.

Krista:
I had forgotten that these characters were supposed to be our age, April. I really did. Because nothing like this has ever happened to anyone I know, and probably never will.
I know, nothing like this has ever happened to me, either! My life is so calm and tame in comparison. Maybe that's why I write these super dramatic things, so I can live vicariously through the characters!
So... when do we get to see Michael's reaction? I'm tired of Michael and Maria being so dumb. You need to make them smarter in your next fic.
You'll see Michael's reaction whenever Maria tells him about it. Or whenever Kyle finds out and tells him, or whenever Isabel decides to do something devilish and tell him, or whenever Tess accidentally lets it slip out, or . . . whenever. ;)

They are kind of being dumb right now, aren't they? I'll cut Michael some slack on account of the fact that he's tangled up in Isabel's web, which is a really horrible place to be, and Maria some slack since she just found out she's having a kid. Good decision-making isn't exactly in the cards for them right now.

And yeah, I think 5:30 my time is 4:30 your time. I don't know time zones, either!

lilah:
Tess is such an awesome friend. I feel bad for her, shes trying so hard to protect Maria then Kyle shows up believing something that Isabel said, Isabel of all people?! Come on Kyle
Kyle needs to stop listening to Isabel, doesn't he? I feel bad for Tess, too. She's sacrificing all her own happiness in order to take care of Maria right now. That's a true friend.

Trixie:
I'm totally feeling for Maria. Her mom and brother are not with her and still do not know of the pregnancy, plus her fear of being unable to provide for her child. Not to mention that her life is changing, before her eyes. The only comfort I have is that Tess is there.
Yeah, thank God Tess is there for her. I don't know what Maria would do otherwise.
I totally hate how Isabel's brain worked faster than Kyle's. I was pretty sure Kyle would realize it.
Yeah, Kyle's brain . . . well, it's alright, but nobody's brain can compete with Isabel's.

Nat:
First of all, what the heck is up with Michael's super sperm? Who is he? Dan Scott?
:lol:
If I was Michael's friend, I'd give him two words: Maury Povich. That man has been fathering children all over the US for years now and is probably the only person who can fix this situation.
Oh my gosh, Nat, you are so funny. :lol:
Fourth: Kyle grew a backbone and so did Tess. I love that. It's too bad that their step forward brought them two steps back.
Sad, huh? But it's probably a good thing, in the long run, that they're fighting. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger and all that.
I hope Maria comes back. This whole depressed, shell living she's been doing lately is getting tiring (think S6 of OTH Brooke Davis crying every episode tiring).
Sometimes I miss Seasons 1-3 Brooke. :( But yeah, Maria's in her dark place, and honestly, I have to keep her there for awhile longer, because if I didn't, it wouldn't be realistic.
That being said, if she does get an abortion I hope she tells him before hand. Michael is so self-righteous that he'd hold it over her head for the rest of their lives.
Yeah, I don't think he'd ever forgive her if she did that.

Karin:
Please don't let isawhore ruin Maria and Tess.
Isabitch, Bitchabel, Isawhore . . . quite the colorful nicknames here. :lol:

killjoy:
Ohhh Isabel doesen't want to lose her place at the top of the mountain I see.She knows that if everything was normal that Michael would choose Maria over her in a second.
Yep, so she's got to play every card she's got.



Thanks for the feedback!

I'm bringing more music. "Today" by The Smashing Pumpkins. It's such an epic song, and you can listen to it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yCSLK0WCUd8&fmt=18 when you see :? (And thanks to Leila, I realized you can actually directly link the emoticon, so I'm gonna do that, too. Woohoo.









Part 66








Max made sure to throw his party at the outside pool of his hotel that afternoon. A pool setting guaranteed that the girls in attendance would be scantily clad and possibly naked.

Liz showed up, only somewhat to his surprise. She could never stay away for long, even when it was in her best interest. She wasn’t one of the naked girls yet, and she probably wouldn’t be. Liz liked to remove her clothing in private, mostly with him.

Max hung back for most of the party, overseeing everything that was going on. Most people were dancing, swimming, drinking, or doing all of the above at once. It really was little more than a college party. A very expensive college party with rich guests in attendance, that was.

“Having a good time?” he asked Liz when she approached him. He was sitting near the deep end of the pool, dangling his feet in the water.

“Yeah, actually, I am,” she admitted, sitting down beside him. She rolled her pants up to her knees and stuck her feet in the water as well. “This party’s not half bad. Actually, it’s kind of great. Much better than the last snoozers you dragged me to.”

“I didn’t drag you; I flew you,” he reminded her. “In a private jet.”

“Whatever.” She rolled her eyes. “So who are all these people? A few of them tried talking to me, but they all seem kind of stupid.”

“That’s ‘cause they are,” Max said. He motioned towards a fat guy about to jump into the shallowest part of the pool. “See?” When the guy jumped, he landed smack-dab on the bottom of the pool, his head still poking above water. He grimaced, but his blubber must have cushioned the fall.

“So they’re all rich?” Liz asked.

“Yeah. Fatso over there inherited his father’s multi-million dollar estate last year. Most of the girls here just married into money.”

“So I’m, like, the only poor one,” Liz concluded.

“Poor but sexy.” Even though there were two topless girls making out with each other underneath the diving board, Max couldn’t even concentrate on them when Liz was next to him.

“Don’t start with that,” she told him.

“Why not?”

“Because this party’s fun, and I don’t want you to ruin it.”

“Of course it’s fun. I’m throwing it, and I’m a fun guy.”

She laughed a little at the absurdity of that claim. “Right. And I’m a virgin.”

He grinned. “You were, until you met me.” She had definitely been his favorite deflowering. “You remember our first night together?”

“Loss of my innocence? How could I not?”

“Oh, Liz.” He shook his head. “You were never innocent.”

“Maybe not,” she conceded, “but I remember the pain.”

“And the pleasure.” He hated it when girls complained about how horrible their first sexual experiences were. He knew for a fact that Liz’s hadn’t been horrible. She’d had an orgasm.

He pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it aside before hopping down into the water. He sank down beneath the surface for a moment to wet his hair, then came up again and motioned with his head for her to join him.

She shook her head. “I didn’t bring a swimming suit.”

“So?” He still had his pants on. She could keep her clothes on, too, or better yet, take them off.

“No,” she said decidedly.

“Suit yourself.” He did a few backstrokes away from her, then stopped and treaded water. The fat guy who had just cannon-balled into the shallow end swam up to him and said, “Hey, great party, man.”

“Thanks,” Max returned. “Maybe we can talk business later. What do you say?”

“Sure.” Fatso smiled at Liz, then said quietly to Max, “She’s hot.”

She’s mine, Max thought. Not that anybody else even stood a chance with her. Hell, he wasn’t even sure if he stood a chance with her anymore. He was trying, and sometimes it seemed like he was making some progress, but he could tell how reluctant she was to let him back in her life again.

He swam back towards Liz and grabbed hold of her ankles beneath the water, spreading her legs apart.

“Max, stop,” she said, jerking one foot away from him.

“No, come on.” He grabbed her ankle again and opened up her legs. This time, she didn’t protest. “It’s seven feet deep here. I need something to hold onto.” He held onto the edge of the pool, right in between her legs, and grinned mischievously. If there weren’t so many people around and if didn’t have any annoying clothes on, he would have been in the perfect position to give her a mind-blowing fingering. Or maybe evening tonguing if she moved a little closer to the edge and lay back a little.

“Didn’t you have to work today?” he inquired.

“This morning,” she replied, “but I got off early.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Really?”

“Got off work early.”

“If that’s your story.”

She rolled her eyes and started to close her legs again. “Max . . .”

“No, don’t.” He pushed them back over, even farther this time. “Seriously, I’m gonna drown if I can’t hold onto the side here.”

“You’re so weird.”

He smiled and dropped down beneath the water again to re-wet his hair. When he came back up, she had not only pulled her legs out of the water but was rising to her feet and walking away.

“Wait, Liz.” He pulled himself up out of the water and followed after her. “Shit, it’s cold out here,” he swore. March in New Mexico wasn’t exactly freezing, but it definitely wasn’t hot out, either. “Wanna warm me up?”

She picked up a towel off one of the poolside chairs and tossed it at him.

He frowned and began to dry off. “Not exactly what I had in mind.”

She whirled around to face him. “What did you have in mind, Max?”

“Do you really have to ask?”

“No, I really don’t.”

“Come on, Liz,” he urged, draping the towel around his shoulders. “You’ve accepted my money. You accepted the invitation to this party. Why can’t you just accept the fact that you want me?”

“I’m leaving,” she decided suddenly.

“No, please stay,” he begged. Literally begged. He hated the fact that she always did this, found a way to get away from him. Couldn’t she tell he needed her around?

She sighed heavily, seeming reluctant to stay. But at the same time, she seemed unwilling to go, and he was grateful for that much.

“Come on,” he said. “Let’s go swimming.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria sat on her bedroom floor, digging through packed up boxes of belongings from home. She hadn’t opened some of those boxes for a long time, ever since she’d first gone to college and packed them. There was one full of toys from her childhood, though, including the baby doll named Miley she’d been carrying around in the Christmas '91 home video. Maria took the doll out of the box and looked at it. She had been a crazy child and had ended up pulling most of its hair out. It had lost one of its eyes, and it wasn’t wearing any pants. She hadn’t exactly taken great care of that doll.

She put the doll back in the cardboard box and shoved the box back under the bed. With uncertainty overwhelming her, she went to Tess’s room and knocked on the door. “Tess?” she called, gently pushing open the door. She peered inside and saw her friend sitting on her bed, facing away from her. She had a photograph in her hand, probably of her and Kyle, and she was crying. She didn’t turn around or do anything to indicate that she had heard her.

Maria shut the door again, feeling guilty. This damn pregnancy was messing up everyone’s lives.

She went back into her bedroom, dimmed the lights, and sat down on her bed, taking out her cell phone. She called Marty, figuring it was as good a time as any to tell him what was going on. She could talk to him about some things, and maybe Tess could get a break from some of the drama for a night.

“Hello?” Marty answered.

“Hey, it’s me,” she said.

“Hey, sis, what’s up?”

She swallowed the lump in her throat and came right out and said it: “I’m pregnant.”

“What? Honey, speak up,” Marty said. “Francis has the TV on super loud. I can barely hear you.”

“I’m pregnant,” Maria repeated more loudly.

Marty was unusually silent for a moment before he shouted, “Francis, turn that damn TV down!”

“But Martin, Queer Eye for the Straight Guy’s on,” Maria heard Francis whine over the phone.

“Oh, screw it, I’ll just go in the bedroom,” Marty decided. Maria waited for him to get to a different, quieter room. “Okay, one more time,” he said, “‘cause it sounded like you just said--”

“I’m pregnant,” Maria told him for the third time since she’d picked up the phone. She’d never said the word out loud so much.

“That. Oh my god,” Marty said dramatically.

“Yeah, that was pretty much my reaction, too.”

Marty made a couple of sounds, but nothing coherent.

“You still there?” Maria asked.

“Yeah. I’m speechless,” he confessed.

“First time for everything.” Marty was a talker. When even he couldn’t gather up any words, it was really bad.

“Seriously, I don’t know what to say.”

“Just don’t say ‘congratulations,’” she told him, “‘cause it’s not a congratulatory thing.”

“Sure it is.”

“Well, not to me. Why does this have to happen to me?” She knew she wasn’t the only one this happened to. Girls her age and younger got pregnant everywhere around the world every single day. It wasn’t exactly a rare occurrence. But she still hated that it was happening to her. “Seriously, Marty, what did I do to deserve this?”

“Uh, you had a lot of sex, I’m guessing unprotected,” he replied.

“Only sometimes. But I was always really good about taking my pill.” She had stuck with birth control all these years even after it had made her gain ten pounds during her junior year of high school. “Stupid pill. It’s bad luck is what it is. I got lucky and got really unlucky because of it.”

“I can’t believe this,” Marty said. “I’m gonna be an uncle.” He squealed. “I’m sorry, I can’t help being excited.”

“And I can’t help being terrified.”

“Why?” he asked. “You’re gonna be a great mom.”

Why would he say that? He had to know it wasn’t true. “No, I’m not,” she said. If he saw the doll underneath the bed, maybe he’d change his mind. “I don’t want this. It wasn’t that long ago that my biggest priority was getting sauced at frat parties and getting laid.”

“Well, you’ve changed,” Marty pointed out. “Because of Michael.”

“Who I’m not even dating or living with anymore. Who I’m not even friends with anymore.”

“Maybe this baby’s just what you two need to work things out and get back together.”

She shook her head. “No, I don’t want him to be with me out of obligation. Besides, he already has obligations to Isabel and the baby he’s having with her.”

“Oh, snap. Forgot about that,” Marty said. “Hmm. Yeah, suddenly I’m seeing why this is a bit of a predicament. But you guys can still make it work.”

“Yeah,” Maria agreed sarcastically, “‘cause we could always embrace polygamy.”

“That’s not what I meant. Have you guys talked about this at all?”

Maria sighed heavily. “No. I haven’t told him yet.” She was still dreading doing that.

“You haven’t told him?”

“No.”

“Well, that’s the first thing you have to do.”

“I know. I will,” she promised. “Eventually.”

“Sooner’s better than later, babe.”

“I’ve only known myself for a couple days,” she said. “But I’ll tell him. It’s just really, really hard.” Neither Tess nor Marty seemed to understand how hard it was, or how hard it was going to be.

“Oh, you’ll get through it,” Marty promised. “And you’ll feel so much better when you do.”

“I guess.” She hoped that were true, but she doubted it. After she told Michael, the drama would just amp up about ten more notches. “It’s just . . .” She licked her lips nervously and pulled her knees up to her chest. “I don’t really know what I’m gonna do about this.”

“What do you mean, what you’re gonna--” Marty cut off abruptly as he seemed to understand what she was insinuating. “Oh. Maria . . .”

“I think I’m only a month along,” she said. “I could have one. I could have one and this could all be over with.”

Marty didn’t say anything.

“I’m sorry,” she said, “I know this isn’t what you wanna hear.”

“Well, yeah, selfishly, I’d love for my niece or nephew to be born,” he acknowledged.

“And part of me wants that, too,” she assured him, “but there’s this whole other part of me that just wants to . . . like, fix it.”

“Fix it?” Marty echoed.

“I know that’s a horrible way to put it. I don’t want you to be ashamed of me.” She felt the tears start to roll down her cheeks, and she fought hard to keep it together. “But it’s about fifty-fifty right now, what I’m gonna do,” she confessed. She didn’t want him to think that abortion was just a little idea in her head, because it wasn’t. It was a huge consideration, and it had been ever since she’d peed on that damn stick.

“I should come home,” Marty said. “I never should’ve left. Why’d you let me leave? You need me there.”

“No, I need you happy,” she told him despite her desperate longing to have her brother around. “Stay, Marty. Stay in Massachusetts with Francis and be happy. Get married. I’ll be alright.”

“I don’t know, Maria . . .”

“It’s not like I’m gonna have the kid anytime soon,” she pointed out. “If ever.”

“But I should be there with you when you’re making the decision,” he protested.

“You are here,” she assured him. Even though he wasn’t physically, just being able to talk to him on the phone like this made her feel so much better. “Don’t come home, Marty. Just promise you won’t hate me if I decide to . . .”

“I love you,” he interrupted adamantly. “I will always love you.”

“Okay. Good.”

“I’ll respect whatever you decide as long as you decide it with Michael.”

Maria frowned. There it was again, the Michael mention. She sort of dreaded telling him more than she dreaded making the decision to have the baby or not. It wouldn’t have been so bad if he weren’t already expecting a baby with Isabel. “But in the end, isn’t the decision mine to make?” she asked.

“Yeah, but you gotta take his opinion into account.”

She nodded. That made sense. She knew he was right.

“Look, I don’t wanna sound, like, preachy or anything,” Marty went on, “but I think you should have this baby.”

Maria tensed. She wanted to hear his advice, but she wasn’t sure that was the advice she wanted to hear.

“You can do this; I know you can,” he said supportively. “And even though it may feel like a curse right now, it’s not. It’s a blessing. I mean, do you know what I would give to be able to create a child with someone I love?”

Maria sniffed back sobs as more tears came falling down. Of course he had to say something like that.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“So not only did I get you in the water, I got you naked.” Max smirked. “I’m proud of myself.”

Liz stood in the pool with Max that night, glad that he couldn’t see her blushing under the moonlight. “I didn’t wanna get my clothes wet,” she said. The party was over now. Everyone had left and it was just the two of them out there.

“Oh, God forbid,” he teased. “Why didn’t you leave your underwear on? Not that I’m complaining.”

She leaned back against the wall, skimming her chin against the top of the water. “I wasn’t wearing underwear,” she said.

Max’s eyebrows shot up in interest. He slipped one hand down beneath the water. Liz didn’t even have to look at where it was going to know that it was wrapping around his cock.

“What about you?” she asked. “What’s your excuse for skinny-dipping.”

He shrugged. “I’m a nudist if you’re a nudist.”

“Stupid.” She rolled her eyes, resisting the urge to smile.

“So just out of my curiosity,” he said, stroking his length beneath the water, “just how high is your fuck count these days? You in double digits?”

“Like with how many guys I’ve slept with? No,” she denied. “There’s only been nine.”

“Only?”

She shot him a look of disbelief. “This coming from the guy who’s slept with, like, nine-hundred girls, most of them prostitutes.”

Max shook his head. “Not that many. I can’t seem to get past one-hundred and fifty-five.”

“Oh, please don’t tell me that,” she begged. “I should really get myself tested.”

“No, don’t worry. I’ve always slept with high-class, STD-free hookers,” he assured her.

“Is there such a thing?” she joked. She tried not to notice what his hand was doing beneath the surface, but it was hard not to. He was touching himself with long, even strokes. And he kept his eyes locked with hers the entire time. She was getting so turned on despite her desire not to.

“Did I ever tell you about the girl I slept with?” she asked.

“No, but I wish you would.”

She slid closer to him and said, “Her name was Maxine.”

“Oh, I remember this.”

“She was a good kisser,” she went on, “very skilled in bed ‘cause she’d had, like, a hundred and fifty-five partners.”

He smirked.

“But you see, Maxine and I couldn’t make it work, because she was too full of herself and too focused on making other people miserable.” She shrugged.

“Huh. And what’s Maxine doing now?”

“Oh, she just got done throwing a party so stupid rich kids would give her money.”

“She must be good at getting people to give things up.”

“Unfortunately she is.” As she stood in that pool staring at him, trying not to pay attention to the small ripples he was making with his hand, she knew she was going to give in. She knew it.

He laughed a little and said, “Alright, I gotta stop.”

“What, jacking off?”

“No, talking. I’m too freaked out by the fact that I’m a girl in this analogy.”

She tried not to smile at that.

“No, rule number one of manhood: Never stop jacking off,” he said. “Unless you got a girl to plug into.”

She rolled her eyes. “That’s a stupid rule.”

“Stupid,” he agreed, “but sexy.”

She grinned in anticipation.

“Wow,” he said suddenly.

“What?”

“Your smile,” he said. “I don’t get to see it very often.”

She lowered her head, suddenly very self-conscious. “Nobody really does,” she mumbled.

He smiled back at her, not the arrogant smile of an up-and-coming businessman, but the all too rare smile of Max Evans the boy. And that was all he had to do. He had her yet again.

“Dammit,” she swore, lowering her hand beneath the water to replace his own as her lips sought out his for a kiss.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tess groaned in frustration when she got Kyle’s voicemail that morning. She knew he didn’t have class, and he was always up by 9:00, so unless he was at work, he was avoiding her calls. Great.

“Kyle,” she said when the beep of his voicemail signaled her to start talking, “I realize things aren’t going so well between us, but could you at least have the decency to pick up your phone when I call or call me back when I leave you a voicemail? Like this one.” She sighed heavily and flipped her phone closed. Every day, she and Kyle just got more and more estranged.

“It’s still a cold-front between you two, huh?” an annoying voice sounded from the door.

Tess turned around to find Liz standing in the doorway. “A what?” she said.

“A cold front. You know, the air mass associated with stormy weather, and since things are stormy between you and Kyle . . . cold front.”

“Hmm, meteorology joke. Not my thing.”

“I thought it was funny,” Liz said with a shrug. She came into the apartment and shut the door behind her.

“Well, it’s good to know the claims that you’re smart aren’t completely unfounded,” Tess said.

“Hey, don’t worry. Kyle will come around,” Liz assured her as she took of her jacket. “He still loves you.”

Oh god, is she planning on staying? Tess wondered. It really wasn’t a good time. It never was anymore. “I’m not so sure,” she muttered. “If he still loved me, wouldn’t that make him—oh, I don’t know—answer the phone?”

Liz opened her mouth to respond, but before she could, Maria came storming out of the bathroom. She’d been in there all morning doing . . . well, doing what pregnant women did in the bathroom.

“Oh my god, Tess, this is awful.” She stopped when she saw Liz, then glared at her and demanded, “What the hell are you doing back here? You already took Marty’s apartment. Leave ours alone. God, Liz, when are you gonna realize we’re not your fucking friends?” As quickly as she had come out, Maria disappeared into the bathroom again. Tess listened as the shower sounded. Whether Maria was actually showering or just trying to conceal the sounds of her morning sickness while Liz was there was unclear.

“Sorry about that,” Tess apologized. “She’s . . . really moody lately.”

“We’ve all been there,” Liz said with a shrug. “PMS, right?”

Tess laughed nervously. “Pretty sure it’s not that.”

“Well, I wish she didn’t hate me,” she said, “but I can understand why she does. I am sleeping with the guy who raped her.”

“You slept with him again?”

Liz sighed. “Yeah. I try not to, but I can’t stop myself. It’s like, whenever I’m around him, I alternate between being weak and strong, determined and, like, unable to resist. And I can’t seem to find that happy medium.”

“Oh, how is it that I end up being everyone else’s therapist?” Tess wondered aloud. “I can’t even figure out my own life.”

“Do you think I should risk it and be with him again?” Liz asked. “Should I give him another chance?”

“You wanna know what I think?” Tess opened up the refrigerator and took out a beer. She fully intended to drink that whole bottle down before Maria came back out. It just didn’t seem fair to booze it up in front of her. “I think your issues with Max and my issues with Kyle are nothing compared to other people’s issues,” she said, popping off the lid. “We’re the only ones standing in our way. So why don’t we all just get over it and go for what we want?”

“Uh . . . ‘cause it’s never that easy,” was Liz’s response.

“Okay, then tell me something: You left town and then you came back. Why?”

“Because, I realized I had to face my problems.”

Tess rolled her eyes. What a perfectly rehearsed answer. “Why else?”

“Well . . . I like to think I was doing Kyle a favor by keeping Max away from you.”

Tess made a face. “Yeah, right.” Liz was nowhere near that selfless.

“Fine, I came back for Max,” Liz confessed. “Don’t ask me to explain why I love him; I just do.”

“If you came back for him, then you might as well be with him,” Tess told her.

“But it’s not that simple.”

“Make it that simple.” Tess raised her beer to her mouth and took a swig of it. Horrible. It was so early in the morning that she probably shouldn’t have been drinking, but . . . what the hell? It was noon somewhere.

“I still love him, and he says he loves me,” Liz said. “But I can’t really trust him, you know what I mean? I’ll never be able to trust him. I don’t know what to do.”

“I guess you’ll just have to trust that love is enough.” Tess glanced down at her cell phone. She was still holding it in her hand. It wasn’t ringing, though. “And so will I,” she whispered.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tess took Maria out to eat at the Olive Garden that afternoon. It was one of their favorite restaurants, but they rarely ever went there because of the high prices. They were both feeling down in the dumps, though, so Maria suspected lunch was Tess’s attempt to make both of them feel better.

“I can’t believe you got the Tour of Italy,” Tess remarked, staring at the large, oval-shaped, food-covered plate in front of Maria. “That’s, like, the biggest, most expensive meal here.”

“Well, I’m eating for two now,” Maria muttered. “Or whatever. Don’t worry, I’ll pay for it myself.”

“No, this lunch is supposed to be my treat. I’ll pay,” Tess insisted.

“I’ve got it,” Maria assured her. “I’m just so fucking hungry.” She shoved another forkful of lasagna into her mouth.

“I see that.”

Maria continued to gorge. The Tour of Italy was definitely a wonderful meal. Lasagna, chicken parmesan, and fettuccini alfredo all on the same plate. Gorgeous.

“So have you worked up the courage to tell Michael yet?” Tess asked out of nowhere.

“About what?” Maria asked with her mouth full.

“Don’t play dumb, Maria. You’re not dumb.”

She felt dumb.

“Hang on a minute,” Tess said, reaching into her pocket. She pulled out her vibrating cell phone excitedly and frowned when she read the number on the caller ID. Apparently not the one she’d been hoping to see. “Who’s this?” she wondered as she opened the phone. “Hello?”

I wonder if I could flirt with the waiter and get him to bring me more lasagna for free, Maria thought. She wasn’t inflated like a blimp just yet. Her sex appeal would probably still work.

“Oh, hi, Dr. Carlson,” Tess said, shooting Maria a confused look.

Oh, here we go, Maria thought. When she’d filled out her patient forms at the doctor’s office, she’d written in Tess’s number instead of her own.

“No, this is Tess Harding, Maria’s friend,” Tess went on. “We met. Yeah.” There was a brief pause before she said, “Oh, she did? I didn’t know that.”

Maria lowered her head and kept focused on her meal. She only had the fettuccini left now. Tess was already done eating. Her meal had been much smaller.

“Sure, I’ll take a message for her,” Tess said. She listened, nodded her head, and muttered things like “Uh-huh,” and “Hmm,” and “I see,” before she said, “Alright, I’ll let her know. Thanks for calling. Mmm-hmm, bye-bye.” She closed her phone and shot Maria a look. “You seriously gave them my phone number?”

“I can’t risk having the call traced back to me,” Maria explained.

“What? Do you hear yourself? We’re not FBI here. No one’s gonna try to trace the call.”

“I just don’t want anyone to know I’m getting a call from that person.”

“Why not? You should be getting calls from him. You’re--”

“Shh!” Maria hissed, cutting her off. “Could we at least try to keep this covert until Michael finds out?”

Tess rolled her eyes. “Fine, you’re getting a call from the . . . flower shop because you're . . . planting flowers.”

“Yeah, and I don’t want Michael to know I’m . . . planting flowers until I tell him, okay?”

“Okay.”

“So what’d the . . . florist say?” she asked, setting her fork down for the first time since they’d entered the restaurant. She reached down and unbuttoned her jeans. They were feeling pretty damn tight after this pig-out on Italian food.

“He studied all your ultrasound images--”

“Shh!” Maria hissed again.

“Sorry, your . . . seed packets in detail,” Tess recovered, making a face at the weird analogy. “It’s too early to tell much, but you’re probably right that you’ve been . . . planting flowers for a month now. Dr. Carlson said you probably started planting flowers during the second week of February. He wants you to go back in a few more weeks so he can give you a more precise date of conception.”

“Tess!”

“Of the flowers. Conception of the flowers.”

Maria rolled her eyes. It wasn’t like anyone there knew them or was listening to them anyway. “Great,” she muttered. “I can’t wait.”

Tess leaned across the table and lowered her voice. “Do you remember when it happened,” she asked, “or . . .”

“No, why does everyone ask that? Isabel asked the same thing.”

“Isabel?” Tess echoed, her eyes growing wide. “Isabel knows?”

“Yeah, unfortunately.”

“What the hell? How’d she find out?”

“I don’t know. She just knew.”

“I didn’t tell her,” Tess promised.

“Neither did I.”

“God, I hate her and her big brain,” Tess grumbled. “Well, this just settles it. Now you have to tell Michael. Like really soon.”

“Why?”

“Because if you don’t, she’s going to.”

“She said she wouldn’t.”

“And you believe her?”

Maria shrugged. “I have to.”

Tess shook her head. “No, you can’t risk it.”

“She has nothing to gain by telling him.”

“That may not stop her. Wouldn’t you rather have him hear it from you than from her?”

“Actually, if she told him, it’d save me from having to do it . . .” Maria contemplated.

Tess gave her a look.

“No, of course I’d rather be the one to tell him,” she conceded.

“Then just get it over with. You’re gonna start to show soon.”

“Am I?”

Tess held up three fingers.

“Three months?” Maria shrieked. She only had two months left before her fabulous body got shot to hell?

Tess nodded.

“Crap,” Maria cursed.

“Three months, and by that time, he’s already gonna have settled into his routines with Isabel and their son.”

“One big happy family,” Maria muttered. “You’re right. I need to tell him. I will tell him. Today. This afternoon.” She couldn’t put it off any longer. “I’ll tell him this afternoon.”

“Are you sure?”

“You just said--”

“I know. I think you should tell him, but I just want you to be ready. There’s no telling how he’s gonna react.”

“Well, he can react however he wants. I’m as ready as I’ll ever be,” Maria decided, reaching towards the basket of breadsticks that accompanied every Olive Garden meal. She’d eaten most of them herself. There was one left, though, just a little one. She practically shoved it all into her mouth at once.

“Hmm,” Tess said, “I think you need more breadsticks first.”

Maria nodded. As long as he kept focused on her insatiable appetite and didn’t dwell on the talk she was going to have with Michael, she felt fine.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Michael stood outside on his apartment’s small balcony. He had a rare free day to enjoy. No work, no school. He wondered what he would have been doing had Maria still lived with him, had they been together and had Isabel not been in the picture. They probably would have stayed in bed until noon, then ordered pizza to eat in bed. And they might have gone out with Kyle and Tess that night had they still been together, too.

“It’s a beautiful day, isn’t it?” Isabel said as she joined him on the balcony.

“Yeah,” he said, “I guess it is.” It was kind of sad that he hadn’t even noticed how beautiful it was. The sun was shining, and the wind was blowing, but not too hard. He just found it difficult to enjoy the nice weather anymore.

“I stood out here this morning for a long time,” she went on. “I can tell it’s almost spring. It’s starting to feel like spring.”

He nodded, thinking about spring break. That’s what he and Maria would be doing if they were still together, enjoying their spring break. They would be scuba diving in Hawaii and swimming with dolphins.

“You know, that’s one nice thing about New Mexico, the fact that you’ve got at least some seasonal variation,” Isabel said. “We didn’t have that in Florida.”

“Not at all?”

“Well, I mean, no, not really. It got cooler in the winter, but it still wasn’t cold. It was mostly hot and sticky. I swear, it rained, like, every single day. The humidity shot my hair to hell.”

Her hair looked fine now. It always did. Isabel always looked glamorous and put-together and . . . perfect. She looked that way.

“So that’s one good thing about being back,” he summarized for her, “less humidity.”

“And getting to spend time with you.” She smiled.

Oh, Isabel, don’t go there, he thought. Please.

“So,” she said, immediately changing the subject, “I’ve got a lot of respect for people who live in, like, North Dakota or Alaska. So cold.”

“Yeah, really,” he agreed.

“It’s a tundra, you know, Alaska,” she informed him. “I learned that in my freshman year geography class.”

“Interesting.”

“No, not really.”

Since she had mentioned geography class, that gave him a nice segue into something he’d really been meaning to talk to her about. “So what’s gonna happen with you and school?” he asked. “Are you gonna go back?”

“I’m not sure,” she replied. “The last semester I completed was . . . god, spring 2008.”

“Only two years left,” he pointed out. He thought it seemed kind of pointless to complete two years of college and leave two years unfinished if you had the chance to go back.

“Yeah, but . . . the baby,” she said, rubbing her stomach. “Can I have college if I’m gonna have a baby?”

“I’d like to think so. I think I’m gonna try for that.” He knew it was going to be hard, working and going to school and being a dad, but since he only had one year left after he completed this spring semester, he had decided he was bound and determined to finish.

“All the more reason for me to put it on hold,” she said. “I mean, sure, it’d be nice to get that business degree, but would I even get the chance to use it? It’s different when you’re a woman.”

He frowned. “It shouldn’t be.”

“Well, it is.” She shrugged helplessly. “Besides . . . okay, this is gonna sound really not feminist, but I could probably settle for being a sexy homemaker.”

He laughed lightly, but he had serious doubts about that. “I don’t know, you’ve always been really ambitious.”

“But isn’t being a mom the most important job in the world?”

He thought about it for a moment and nodded. “Probably.”

“I haven’t set anything in stone yet,” she said. “Obviously if there were ever a chance for me to get involved in the Evans company, I wouldn’t hesitate.”

“Yeah.” He nodded. “Although I think you’re better off not gettin’ mixed up in that, though. All it does it make people miserable.”

Isabel gripped the balcony railing with one hand and lowered her head. “I hope I don’t make you miserable,” she mumbled quietly.

“What?”

“I just don’t want you to end up resenting me, looking back on the day you and Maria walked into this apartment and saw me standing here as the day your life ended,” she explained. “Because I think it’s the day your life began.”

That wasn’t the way he would put it. “It’s the day my life changed,” he corrected. For awhile he had felt as though his life had ended, but now he knew it hadn’t. Still, he’d lost something important to him, and things were different now. And not better. “I won’t resent you,” he promised, and he meant that.

“Thanks,” Isabel said, smiling softly. Suddenly, she let go of the railing and touched her stomach with both hands. “Oh,” she said, a look of surprise on her face.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, immediately panicked. Was she going into labor?

“Nothing,” she said. “The baby just kicked.” She smiled. “He’s a livewire.” She gazed at him questioningly and asked, “You wanna feel him?”

Did he? He’d never felt his son before. “Yeah,” he said.

“Okay, just put your hand here.” She took one of his hands in hers and laid it down atop her belly, just slightly off-center to the right. “Do you feel him?” he asked.

It felt like a faint tapping beneath the palm of his hand. It felt incredible. “Yeah,” he said, shocked by the fact that it was his baby in there. “Wow.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria drove over to the Fairview apartment complex, her heart beating a mile a minute. She could barely hold onto the steering wheel because her palms were so sweaty, and she could actually feel her body trembling with nerves. “I’m not scared,” she tried to convince herself as she pulled into the parking lot. “I can do this.” She took her key out of the ignition and climbed out on shaking legs. She took a deep breath, trying to hold onto the miniscule amount of courage she had managed to gather, and shut the driver’s side door, suddenly wishing she’d prepared a speech for this.

( :? )

She had only taken a few steps forward when she made the mistake of glancing up at the balcony she knew to be Michael’s. When she did, she stopped dead in her tracks. Nothing could have prepared her for the sight she saw.

Michael and Isabel were standing outside, close to each other. Michael’s hands were on her stomach, and they were smiling. And laughing. And saying things Maria couldn’t and didn’t want to hear. Isabel looked beautiful, and Michael looked in awe of the son he was having with her.

Maria stared at the two of them—or rather the three of them—in disbelief. She knew Isabel had been staying there, and she knew that Michael had been playing the role of supportive father for awhile now. But somehow, she hadn’t expected them to look happy. They looked like a scene from a painting, like something an artist would capture on canvas and display in a museum for all onlookers to study and say, ‘Oh, that’s so sweet.’

Every ounce of courage she had mustered up vanished in an instant, and she felt all sorts of horrible things: sorrow, envy, hate, longing . . . but not courage. She wasn’t brave, and once again, she felt as though she couldn’t do this. So she got back in the car and fired it up. She had to get out of there.

She turned the car around and took one last look back at the happy couple in her rear view mirror. They weren’t even looking at her. She pressed the gas pedal and drove back through the parking lot.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“Isn’t that surreal?” Isabel said.

“Yeah, it’s really . . .” Michael trailed off when he caught sight of a familiar car driving out the parking lot. Even though he couldn’t see the driver, he didn’t need to. He recognized that car. He’d stood for hours in the mall with his left hand on it. He’d had quite a few fun times with Maria in the backseat of it.

“What?” Isabel asked.

He watched the car turn out onto the street. “Nothing,” he said, trying to smile at her. But his eyes betrayed him. He watched Maria drive away, and he wondered why she had been there. Whatever the reason, he wished she had stayed.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria slammed her car door shut and ran inside The Links complex. She’d started crying on the way home, unable to control herself. No matter how hard she tried to erase the image from her mind, it stayed there. Michael and Isabel and their baby. And the balcony. She and Michael had made love out on that balcony once. Didn’t he remember that? Didn't he remember any of it? Didn’t he even care?

She staggered up the stairs to the third floor, her sobs coming faster and heavier now. She should have just taken the elevator. God, she couldn’t stop torturing herself. She felt like she should have known she would drive over there and see something like that. She should’ve known. And she should have never deluded herself into thinking she was ready to tell Michael the truth when she never would be.

She shakily inserted her key into the lock and shoved open the door. She slammed it shut behind her and ran down the hallway into her bedroom, wailing. She slammed that door shut just like all the others and barely made it to her bed before her legs gave out. She collapsed, barely catching herself on her forearms, and watched for a moment as salty tears splattered on her bedspread. And then something happened: She stopped crying. Not because she wasn’t still sad or angry, but because she imagined what it would be like to feel her own baby kick. She would feel it, but Michael wouldn’t. He’d be too busy with his other child.

She sat up and tried to feel her heartbeat. It’d been beating so fast on the way over to Michael’s, but now she couldn’t feel it at all. Because it had been torn out of her chest.

She wrapped one arm around her stomach, and in that moment, she decided what she was going to do about her baby.









TBC . . .

-April
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LOVE IS MICHAEL AND MARIA.
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April
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Part 67

Post by April »

First off, thanks to those of you who showed up at my chat yesterday, especially Nove, BB, Leila, Alison, and Evelynn since we all crashed onto Roswell Heaven afterwards. :lol: I had fun. You guys are so weird. :lol:

And blame BB's chat for me not getting this update out earlier! I've been distracted. ;)

nibbles:
And I'd just love to see Isabel's face when she finds out that Maria didn't do as she was supposed to.
Yeah, Isabel would be fuming on the inside! Although, if Maria goes through with the abortion, we won't get to see that face.

Sara:
Have a great weekend writing FLUFFY UPDATES!
:lol: Nice! If it makes you feel any better, I was writing fluffy updates for my next fic. ;)

Leila:
Tess needs some lovin' sometime soon. Kyle should answer her and try to make amends...both should.
Yeah, because really, their relationship drama is the least complicated out of everyone in this story. It's still complicated enough that they can't seem to figure it out, though.

Eva:
God, what a mess! And the only one enjoying it is Isabel.
I know, everything's pretty much going her way right now.

Nove:
You are one majestic thinker.
Aw, thanks! I wish I could be a "majestic thinker" with my schoolwork right now.
I'm sad April. I have to go to my little cousin's birthday party tomorrow. So I'm going to miss your chat
Did you end up not going to the birthday party or something? :D

Alison:
Why do you hurt me like this? Do you enjoy it?
Yes. :twisted:

Ginger:
I love Tess's personality and he quick wit. No wonder they all seek her out for support but she needs someone to support her too
Yeah, Tess is trying to figure out everyone else's lives right now, and she barely has any time to think about herself.

killjoy:
You know....Liz,Kyle and Maria are about to get on my last nerve in this story.
Well, while Maria and Liz will probably continue to get on your nerves, the good news is that Kyle is probably going to get back on your good side. I know things have been really rough between Tess and Kyle for literally hundreds of pages now, but they're going to start taking steps in the right direction.
Maria....this 'ohhh feel bad for me' crap has to end
Yeah, she's feeling very sorry for herself. And I can't say I blame her, because if I found out I was pregnant, and the guy who impregnated me wasn't even my boyfriend anymore, and if his ex was in town, also pregnant, and it seemed like he was starting up this happy family with her, I'd feel pretty sorry for myself, too. But you're right, she's not fighting for him, and Isabel is most definitely fighting. But if Maria does start fighting for Michael, she could probably beat Isabel easily, just due to the fact that Michael loves her and not Isabel.

Trixie:
I'm cursing the gods of bad timing for this...How terrible for Maria to witness that. Incredibly heartbreaking.
I know, it was just the exact wrong timing.

Sarah:
If you can abort Isabitch after she has her baby, so much the better.
I think the call to kill Isabel has never been higher. But like I always say, it's not gonna happen.

POM: A new feedbacker after all this time? *does her happy dance* Thank you for the feedback.
I'm loving the Max and Liz parts, please come back soon!!!
You know, not many people have said that over the course of this fic, so I'm glad you're enjoying them.

Krista:
So here's my excuse for missing the author's chat. My mom decided she wanted to take me shopping. So new clothes won out over staying home. You know I love you though.
New clothes win out over everything! And you can't beat mom-sponsored shopping. It's just the best thing ever. ;)
Ugh @Maria.
I think you're going to be ugh-ing @Maria for awhile to come. But bear with her, if you can!

Karin: Isawhore. :lol: And I like your OTH references. I just got Season 6 on DVD. Even though I'm not anti-LP, they're a little nauseating during these first episodes. :roll:

Neve: I figured it's about time I start calling you by your name. Though I still love your username.
Liz is another one who makes my blood boil. She is such a selfish user. She's a junior in college. In three years of school did she really not make any friends other than Maria?
Well, actually, she and Kyle are sophomores in college. But really, Liz has no friends. Which is kind of her own fault.
Isabel is just like Max, she hurts people in the most cruel way possible. Maria suffered through that once already. Can you blame her for bailing before she got hurt again?
That's a really good point. I think you brought up somethign even I haven't thought about it, but you're right.




As I was reading through this part, I realized how incredibly . . . heavy it is. I really can't think of another word to use. Heavy subject matter, heavy discussions, and some stuff that's probably gonna piss you guys off. But the last scene of this part should offer some much-needed hope, so . . . hold onto that. :P








Part 67








Isabel walked into the bedroom that evening and smiled. Inside, she was ecstatic, but outside, she was trying not to show it. Michael had agreed, after much persuasion, to sleep in the bed with her that night. It was a huge deal.

“It’s about time,” she said, lying down beside him.

“Well, there’s only so much couch a man can take before he goes insane,” he joked, sounding nervous. He was sitting up straight, clutching the blankets close to his lap. And unfortunately, he was fully clothed. So was she. It was part of the arrangement.

“It’s your bed,” she pointed out, pulling the covers up over her round stomach. “You have every right to be here.”

“Well, if you stay on that side and I stay on this side, it shouldn’t be a problem,” he said. “We’ll just pretend there’s an imaginary line down the center of the bed.”

“Sexy,” she remarked sarcastically, really wishing they wouldn’t do that. An imaginary line? What were they, twelve?

“Well . . .” He shrugged.

Oh, you’re still adorable, she thought, looking him up and down. She’d slept in this bed with him many times before when there hadn’t been an imaginary line or clothing involved. This really brought back memories. “I had a good day today,” she told him.

“That’s good.”

You had a good day, too, she thought. Just admit it. He looked so adorably sexy sitting next to her. She couldn’t hold out any longer. She had controlled herself ever since she’d come back. Now it was time to cross the line.

“Well,” she said, “goodnight.” She leaned over and kissed him, but not just on the cheek this time. On the lips. She waited as he unsurely kissed her back. And then she kissed him again, wishing he would open his mouth so that she could deepen the kiss.

It only took a moment for him to pull away. “No . . .” He looked down at his lap and said, “I’m here for you, Isabel, but not like that.”

She hadn’t expected rejection. Things had been going so well between them. She’d been hoping that they would make out before bed and agree to start up their relationship again. It was supposed to be inevitable, but Michael was being so stubborn. Fuck.

“I’m gonna go sleep on the couch,” he said, slipping out of the bed. He took his pillow with him and left the room.

She clenched her jaw shut and sighed in disappointment and anger. That hadn’t gone the way she’d intended it to. But someday soon, it would. Once she’d lost all this unattractive baby weight, he’d want her again. He’d want her.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Try as she might, Maria couldn’t get to sleep that night. Her mind was racing, and she needed to tell someone about it. Not only was Tess the only person around, but she was the only person she could talk to about what was going on in her life.

Maria climbed out of bed that night and trudged down the hallway to Tess’s bedroom. She pushed open the door, and it creaked. Tess stirred and opened her eyes. “Maria?” she said, peering into the darkness. She propped herself up on her forearms and asked, “What’s going on? It’s . . .” She glanced at her bedside clock. “My god, is it 3:30?” She yawned and rubbed her eyes.

Maria felt bad for waking her friend up, but she had to. She had to. She stood in the doorway and let the words come out as simply as possible. “I don’t think I can have this baby, Tess.”

Tess froze in silence. Maria didn’t have to see the look on her face to know exactly what it looked like: stunned and worried.

“What?” Tess finally spat as she reached over to turn on her bedside lamp. She squinted at Maria in confusion.

“I can’t,” Maria choked out, heading back on down the hallway.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a minute.” Tess sprang out of bed and ran after her. She grabbed Maria’s arm and kept her from slipping back into her bedroom. “You haven’t said one word since you went to see Michael, and all of a sudden you say that?” Tess dragged her out into the living room and said, “Here, sit down. Sit.”

Maria practically collapsed on the couch, looking down at her lap instead of at Tess. She felt ashamed about this. She couldn’t imagine who wouldn’t.

“I need you to talk to me,” Tess said calmly, sitting beside her. “I don’t understand. When you say you can’t have this baby, what do you mean by that?”

Maria abruptly lifted her head. “What do you think I mean by that?”

Tess just stared at her.

Maria sighed in defeat. “Don’t make me say it.” She really didn’t want to say it.

“You have to,” Tess told her. “If you’re thinking about doing it, you should be able to say it.”

She wasn’t just thinking about doing it; she was for sure doing it. “I want an abortion,” she blurted angrily. “There.”

Tess took in a sharp breath upon hearing the words spoken aloud. “Okay,” she said, still trying to sound calm even though it was clear that she was quickly becoming worked up. “I’m so floored right now. This is coming out of nowhere.”

Maria shook her head, looking down at her lap again. “No, it’s not.” This was an idea that had been in her mind ever since she’d noticed she wasn’t getting her period.

“But I thought you were set on having this baby,” Tess went on as she tried to understand. “You never said anything about an abortion.”

“You never asked,” Maria muttered. “Just because I wasn’t talking about it doesn’t mean I wasn’t thinking about it. You know, I never wanted any of this.”

“Well, I never wanted to be so short, but I got used to it.”

“There’s a big difference between being short and being pregnant, Tess,” Maria pointed out.

Tess sighed. “Fair enough, but . . . God, I don’t even think I know how to have this conversation, Maria.”

Maria shrugged. It wasn’t as though either of them had ever had it before.

“But we’re gonna have it anyway,” Tess decided in that moment. “Do you understand exactly what you’re saying? I mean, do you really get the significance of it?”

“Yes!” Maria insisted. “I’m not stupid.”

“No, I know, it’s just . . .” Tess paused for a moment and raked one hand through her sleep-tousled hair as though she were considering what to say next. “You know how everyone takes a freshman English class,” she said, “and when the professor assigns an argumentative essay, everyone writes about abortion?”

Maria grunted, remembering the D she’d received very well. “Mine was pro-choice,” she said.

“There’s a reason why everyone writes about abortion, okay, because it’s pretty much the most controversial topic in the entire world. It’s obviously not a black or white issue; it’s like the greyest shade of grey,” Tess went on. “So when I ask if you get what you’re saying, I’m not trying to make you feel stupid. I’m just trying to make sure you’re not making a hasty decision.”

“I’m not,” Maria insisted.

“Kinda seems like you are.”

Maria huffed. Of course Tess would assume that. “I’ve thought about this a lot, and trust me, it’s not an easy decision to make,” she said, “but I’ve made it.”

Tess frowned.

“I’m sorry,” Maria apologized, “I know this must be hard for you to hear. I think you’ve always been more pro-life than I am.”

“This has nothing to do with being pro-life or pro-choice,” Tess said. “I’m your best friend, so I’m pro-whatever you decide. I just wanna make sure you’re making a completely informed decision. Either way, this is gonna affect the rest of your life, and it’s gonna determine whether or not your baby’s ever going to have a life. It’s the biggest of big deals.”

“I know.” Maria moved farther down the couch, suddenly feeling a bit suffocated. She wasn’t sure what she had expected. Obviously Tess wasn’t going to not talk to her about this. But somehow, she had let herself be naïve enough to think that she would just announce she was having an abortion, she would have it, and then everything would be good again. No lengthy discussion in between.

Tess scooted towards her. “Maria . . .”

“Look, I’m already sick of talking about it, okay?”

“But we need to talk about it.”

We don’t need to talk about anything. It’s not your decision; it’s mine.”

“I know, but you told me, so that makes me a part of it,” Tess explained. “I can’t just go back to sleep now, and neither can you.”

Maria sighed and pulled her knees up to her chest. She wished she could crawl into that bed and feel safe and warm and comfortable. But she hadn’t felt that way in a long time.

“Do you know what kind of abortion you’d like to have?” Tess asked suddenly.

“What?” Maria didn’t even know there were different kinds.

“Yeah, there’s vacuum aspiration, which is, like, the suction method. That’s the most popular.”

Maria made a face. Suction? “Uh . . . yeah, that, I guess.”

“They have some drug combinations, too, legal, of course. They’re usually pretty safe and painless for the . . . fetus.”

It’s a fetus, Maria reminded herself. That’s all it is. It couldn’t feel pain or pleasure. It couldn’t laugh or move its toes or do any of the things people did.

“When do you think you’d have it done?” Tess went on to ask.

“Um . . . soon?” She figured it was better to get it done soon. “I mean, after a certain point, a lot of doctors won’t do it ‘cause they think it’s too dangerous or unethical, right?”

“Right.” Tess nodded, then asked yet another question, and it was the biggest question of them all. “Why?”

There were too many answers to that question to pick just one.

“‘Cause you think you can’t handle it?” Tess ventured a guess.

“Because I know I can’t handle it,” Maria corrected adamantly. “I know I’m twenty-one and I should be an adult by now, but I’m not. I’m still a kid, and I don’t wanna be a mom. Not now. Not for a long time, if ever.” There had been a time, back when she and Michael had been together and happy, that she’d briefly envisioned little Michaels and little Marias scampering about. But she and Michael weren’t together and happy anymore. It was all different.

“Maria . . .”

“I know if other people found out about this, they’d accuse me of using abortion as a form of birth control,” Maria cut in, “but I swear I’m not.”

“Well . . . aren’t you, though?”

“No. I mean . . . I don’t think so.” Even if she was . . . it didn’t matter. Her mind was made up. “I was actually on the pill, you know. I took the precaution, and this just happened anyway. It’s freakin’ bad luck. It’s like . . . it’s like, you know, if a burglar broke open a locked door and entered a woman’s house, should he have the right to stay there? No.”

“No, of course not,” Tess agreed, “but your baby’s not a burglar, Maria.”

“It feels like it,” Maria confessed. “I know it sounds horrible, but I feel like I’m being forced into sharing this body with someone else. But isn’t it still mine?”

“Absolutely,” Tess assured her, “but that’s not the issue. The issue is whether it just belongs to you.”

Maria rolled her eyes. Even though Tess wasn’t saying it flat-out, it was pretty clear what her opinion was. “Clearly you think I should share.”

“I’m sorry if it’s coming off that way; I’m really trying to be objective,” Tess assured her. “It’s just that I’ve already formed an emotional attachment to this baby, and honestly, Maria, I think you sell yourself short. You say you don’t wanna be a mom, probably because you don’t think you can be a good one. But I think you’d make a great mom. I think you’d love your kids with all your heart, and I think you’d be surprised how much they’d love you back.”

Maria shook her head. They wouldn’t love her. They’d hate her, because she didn’t know what to do. She wouldn’t teach them the right things, and they’d end up resenting her.

“But it really doesn’t matter what I think,” Tess acknowledged. “What’s Michael have to say about all this?”

Maria bristled and snapped her head up. “Michael?”

“Yeah. You were back from his place so soon this afternoon, and you haven’t told me anything. But I heard you crying, so . . .” She trailed off and looked at Maria sympathetically. “How’d he react when you told him? Was he confused, sad, mad, scared? Happy?” She smiled hopefully. “All of the above?”

“I don’t know,” Maria mumbled.

“Well, how’s he feel about an abortion?”

Maria closed her eyes and pressed her fingers to her forehead, feeling a massive headache coming on. “I didn’t tell him,” she confessed.

“The abortion part?” Tess asked.

“Any of it. I didn’t tell him anything.”

“Oh god, Maria,” Tess groaned. “Why not?”

“Well, I was going to, but I just . . .” She saw it in her head all over again, the scene she’d witnessed earlier, the happy couple standing out on their balcony, feeling their baby kick, and she felt jealous and hurt and angry. “I got there, and he and Isabel were standing outside together, and he was smiling and, like, feeling their baby, and they just looked like this picture-perfect happy little family, and I just . . . I couldn’t. I didn’t even know what words to say.

“How about ‘I’m pregnant’ for starters?” Tess suggested.

“Hey, you don’t know how hard this is. If it was just me and Michael and no Isabel . . . then maybe it’d be a little easier, but it’d still be hard. And even then, you and I might still be having this same conversation.” It wasn’t just the Isabel factor that was deterring her from having this baby. It was a combination of things.

“Well, you’re just prolonging things and making excuses at this point,” Tess said. “You have to tell him everything.”

“Do I?” Maria asked quietly, unable to hold it in any longer. From the moment Tess had started harping on telling Michael, she’d wondered why she had to.

“Yes, of course you have to. How could you not--” Tess cut off sharply, and her eyes grew wide. “Oh. No, Maria. No! You can’t have an abortion without telling Michael.”

“Why not?” It seemed like the perfect solution.

“Because it’s wrong!” Tess shouted. “There’s no grey area here! It’s just wrong. You may be the one carrying the baby, but if you’re pregnant, then Michael’s pregnant, too, and he deserves to know about it.”

“But if he knows I’m pregnant, he’ll never let me get an abortion,” Maria pointed out.

“It’s not like he can stop you!”

“No, he could.” Maria had thought about all of this, or at least mostly all of it, and Michael’s reaction to the news that she wanted an abortion was one of the things she had dwelled on most. “He’ll look at me, and he’ll say my name, and he’ll tell me everything’s gonna be alright; and I’ll believe him, even though I know I shouldn’t.”

“Maybe you should,” Tess suggested.

“No.” Maria wanted to be optimistic, but she had to be realistic instead. “And even though he’ll be freaked out, and even though his life’s already screwed up enough, he’ll want me to have the baby, and he’ll wanna be a father again, because that’s just the kind of guy he is.”

“His opinion matters, Maria. This isn’t just about you, you know. There are other people involved here.”

“But what’s the point of telling him?” Maria wondered.

“It’s just the right thing to do!” Tess persisted.

“According to you. But I think it’ll just stress both of us out even more.”

“It’s called honesty, Maria, and it’s always the best policy.”

Maria grunted. “Look who’s talking.” Maybe if Tess had been a little more honest with Kyle, they wouldn’t be so estranged right now.

“You know, I’m really trying not to yell at you right now, but you’re making it really hard,” Tess told her. “How can you even consider not telling him? This is the guy you claim to love.”

“I do love him,” Maria insisted.

“Then give him the chance to react to this and give you his input.”

“I don’t need input; I need an abortion!” Maria shouted, throwing her arms down at her sides. She was getting so pissed. “And no, he doesn’t need to know! If I have one soon enough, he’ll never have to know anything about this pregnancy. He and Isabel can live happily ever after, and I’ll be alone, which is a hell of a lot better than being girl number two in the Guerin-DeLuca-Evans love and baby triangle.”

Tess buried her face in her hands and mumbled, “I can’t believe I’m hearing you say this.” She sounded on the verge of tears. “Having an abortion is arguable at best, but I can support you if that’s what you want.” She lifted her head and looked at Maria again, and Maria saw that she was indeed crying. “I can’t support keeping Michael in the dark,” she choked out. “It’s not right.”

“I’m sorry, but I don’t care about right and wrong right now. I care about the fact that I’m pregnant and I don’t wanna be. And I don’t give a rat’s ass if that’s a selfish thing to say, ‘cause I just said it.”

Tess wiped her tears away and asked, “But how would you feel if the situation were reversed and he was keeping some life-changing secret from you?”

“I’d feel . . . grateful and relieved that he was sparing me the drama.”

“No, you wouldn’t. You’d feel betrayed,” Tess said matter-of-factly. “If you ever found out about it, you’d feel so betrayed, and that’s exactly how Michael’s gonna feel when he inevitably finds out about all this.”

“How’s he gonna find out? I’m not gonna tell him. I sure as hell hope my best friend won’t tell him.”

“No, I won’t,” Tess promised, “because I know it’s not my place. But we’re not the only ones who know, remember?”

Maria felt her heart sink even farther down. “Isabel.” That horrible human being managed to ruin everything.

“Do you really think she’s gonna keep her big mouth shut? Considering the fact that I once heard she sucked off her entire high school’s football team with that big mouth, I’m thinking not.”

“She said she wishes she’d had one, an abortion,” Maria pointed out.

“Of course she said that. It’s called planting seeds of doubt, which is practically what Isabel does for a living.”

“More like watering them,” Maria corrected. “The seeds were already there.” And she’d planted them herself.

“Fine, but this is exactly what she wants. Don’t you see? This is, like, ammunition she can use against you at any time, and you know she will.”

“No, she has no reason to,” Maria persisted. She wasn’t trying to give Isabel the benefit of any doubt, but she certainly didn’t want to acknowledge any flaws in her own plan. “If she tells him I’m pregnant right now, sure, maybe he’ll be mad at me for awhile. But in the long run, it’ll screw up what they have going on, too. She won’t have his undivided attention anymore, and that won’t sit well with her.”

Tess rolled her eyes. “Okay, but say eight months down the line, she notices you’re not big and round and going into labor. Hmm, that’s gonna be a pretty clear indicator you aborted the kid, and then she has no reason not to tell Michael about it. She’ll come off looking honest and loyal and you’ll come off looking like a lying--” She silenced herself abruptly.

“What?” Maria prompted. “Murderer? Killer? Maniac?”

“He’ll hate you for lying, and he’ll thank her for telling the truth,” Tess explained desperately. “And she’ll get what she wants. If nothing else, that’s why you have to tell him. If you don’t, you’re gonna end up in second place for sure.”

“I’m already in second place,” Maria pointed out. Michael had impregnated two girls, after all, but Isabel was the one living with him and enjoying his company 24/7. “He let me go,” she recounted sadly. “I know I wasn’t strong and I backed out on him when he needed me most, but he let me back out. He didn’t fight for me; he fought for Isabel. So I’m used to second place.”

“But he’s not with Isabel; he’s with the child he’s having with her. And if you give him the chance, he’ll be with your child, too. Because you said it yourself: he’s that kind of guy. He’s a good guy. He deserves better than all these lies.”

Maria finally felt her own tears piling up. She’d managed to keep them down throughout the entire conversation, but the more they talked about Michael . . . Michael, the guy she still loved and adored with all her heart . . .

“Please don’t tell him,” she whimpered, rising to her feet. “I understand what you’re saying. Really, I do. But I just don’t want him to know.” She had made her decision, and nothing Tess said would make her change her mind. She hurried off down the hallway to her bedroom before the tears spilled out, leaving her stunned best friend in the living room to cry on her own.

She wasn’t having this baby.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Isabel got up the next day, feeling unusually nervous about things. She hoped she hadn’t made a huge mistake by kissing Michael last night. She hoped she hadn’t scared him off. She was probably going to have to do some damage control. At least she was pregnant. Pregnancy was a powerful tool in the game of getting your guy. Good thing Maria didn’t know that.

Isabel walked out into the living room and looked over the couch. It didn’t appear slept on. Michael had probable either crashed with Kyle last night, paced all night long, studied, or painted. The only thing she knew was that he hadn’t slept in bed with her, and they’d been so close to doing that.

She was grabbing a bottle of water out of the refrigerator when he walked in the door carrying that morning’s mail. He immediately looked as nervous as she felt when he saw her.

“Hey,” she said, setting the water back down in the refrigerator and shutting the door.

“Hey,” he returned, shutting the front door. “Sleep well?”

“Slept alone,” she tried to joke, but he wasn’t laughing. He flopped down on the couch and began sorting through the mail, leaving her to carry on the conversation by herself. She tucked her hair behind her ear and tried to think of something non-threatening to say. But that was hard to do when you were a person who was . . . well, threatening. “Look, I wanna apologize for last night,” she said. “I shouldn’t have kissed you. I overstepped my bounds. It’s just, there we were, getting ready to sleep in that bed together for the first time since . . . he happened.” She pointed towards her belly. “And it brought back memories. Good ones. I got caught up. I just hope this won’t make things weird between us now, because with the baby on the way, we really can’t afford for things to get weird.”

“Yeah,” he agreed, setting the mail aside. “No, it’s fine. Don’t worry about it.”

“Really?” She was so relieved to hear that.

“Yeah, it’s fine.”

“Good. I promise, I’ll control myself next time. Unless you don’t want me to.” She grinned.

He laughed a little and said, “No, I want you to.”

Nice determination, baby, she thought, her skin singing at the thought of him finally giving in and touching her again someday.

“Let’s just forget about it, forget it ever happened,” he suggested as though it were that simple, “and move on. How’s that sound?”

“Hmm.” Sounds . . . convenient, she thought. And frustrating. You tease. “Sounds good,” she lied, smiling agreeably. “Let’s forget.” But she wasn’t going to forget anything between her and Michael. Ever.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria was sitting at the kitchen counter shoveling in spoonful after spoonful of cereal the next morning when Tess came out of her bedroom and slapped a purple folder down in front of her, disturbing her cereal bowl and knocking milk onto the counter. Maria gave her a questioning look, and Tess just motioned to the folder in response. Maria pushed her breakfast aside and lifted up one of the folder flaps. What she saw inside was just about enough to activate her hyperactive gag reflex. It was a picture of what an aborted fetus looked like. She immediately slammed the folder shut and said to Tess, “Three questions: Why would you look that up, why would you print if off, and why on earth would you show it to me?

“Because you need to see it,” Tess replied. “And you should know that if you walk into an abortion clinic, there are gonna be dozens of protestors standing out front holding up pictures just as graphic and worse.”

Who cares about them? Maria thought. I don’t.

“After we talked last night, I looked up a lot of stuff,” Tess kept on. “There was this website with all these testimonials from girls who had abortions. A lot of them said they thought an abortion would fix everything, but it didn’t. It seems like, for the majority of them, it made everything worse.”

“So much for supporting my decision, huh?” Maria snapped, sliding the folder back towards Tess.

“Okay, I’m trying here, but it’s really hard for me to support you when . . .”

“When you think I’m making the wrong decision?” Maria filled in. “Just say it.”

Tess waited a moment before carefully saying, “I think you’re making a decision for the wrong reasons. Maria, I feel like you’re one of those girls who wants this to solve all her problems, but it’s not going to. If anything, it’s just gonna create new ones, especially if you don’t tell Michael.”

“What would be the right reasons?”Maria asked.

Tess gave her a confused look. “What?”

“You said I’m making a decision for the wrong reasons,” Maria reiterated. “So I’m curious, what would the right reasons be?”

“I . . . I don’t know,” Tess stuttered. “Look, I’m functioning on very little sleep and a high amount of stress right now, and I’m not pretending to have all the answers.”

“Sure you are.”

“I just don’t know what to say to make you understand.”

“I understand fine,” Maria assured her. “You want me to tell Michael; you’ve made that perfectly clear. But it’s not gonna happen.” She thought she had made that perfectly clear, too.

“I has to happen, Maria!” Tess erupted. “You say you understand, but you don’t. You don’t understand. I know I promised I would stand by you throughout all of this, but I can’t bear to see you keep this a secret from him. He deserves better than that, and you are better than that.”

“I’m not.”

“Yes, you are,” Tess insisted. “So if you abort this baby--”

When.” There was no possibility that she wouldn’t.

If you abort this baby, I’ll be disappointed,” Tess said. “But if you abort it without Michael’s consent, I’ll be devastated, because I won’t know who you are anymore.” She shoved the folder back at Maria and shrugged helplessly. “I gotta get to work,” she whimpered. “Think about it.” She grabbed her purse and her coat and practically ran out the door. Maria tried to open up the folder and look at the picture inside of the aborted fetus again, but . . . she couldn’t do it.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Max sat in his office with an open beer can in his left hand, his right hand poised on the mouse to his computer. He was playing Solitaire. No, it wasn’t the most productive use of his time, but he was bored, and he felt a bit redneck that day. He was playing the hardest version of solitaire, the kind where three cards were dealt at once; and he was winning of course. He had to change the cards, though. These cards had palm trees on their backs. He wanted naked ladies.

When he heard a knock on his door, he didn’t even look up. “Roger, I told you to leave,” he said. “You smell like desperation.” He caught sight of a familiar figure stepping foot inside his office, though, blonde and feminine and attractive, not at all like Roger. What the hell was Maria doing there? She looked very timid, not like herself.

“Well, now.” He made the last move to win his Solitaire game, and the computer congratulated him. He turned off the monitor and said to her, “Never expected to see you darken my doorway.” He tossed his beer can into the trashcan beneath his desk and said, “I’m not gonna apologize.”

She scrunched up her forehead in confusion. “What?”

“For having sex with you,” he elaborated. “I’m not gonna apologize. It won’t do any good.”

“That’s not why I’m here,” she said, wrapping her arms around herself. “I can’t believe I’m here.”

“I could say the same thing.” Most other hot blondes would be welcome in his workplace, but Maria . . . Maria was a bitch, and the two of them had a very unpleasant dynamic. “Is this about me and Liz gettin’ back together?” he asked, running through the list of possibilities. There were only handful of reasons why she would be there.

“I don’t care about that,” she said, sitting down in the chair across his desk. “Here’s the thing: You’re the most horrible, unethical person I know.”

“Thank you.”

“And I need to talk to you, because . . . I think I’m about to do something pretty horrible and unethical.”

He leaned forward, his interest instantly piqued. “Alright, you have my attention, Maria. Do tell. This better not disappoint.”

“I’m pregnant,” she blurted.

“And it doesn’t,” he chuckled. “Wow.” He glanced down at her flat stomach and tried to make sense of it. “You can’t be very far along.”

“I’m not.”

“Michael’s?” he asked for clarification.

“Yes.”

“Holy crap.” He laughed. “Somebody get that guy a condom. Or two or twenty.”

“I’m planning on having an abortion and not telling him,” Maria went on suddenly.

Even Max was taken aback by that. It took a lot to make him fall silent on anything. At last, though, he regained his words. “So when you said horrible and unethical, you weren’t kidding, huh?”

She rolled her eyes.

“What? What do you want me to say?”

“You just said it,” she mumbled. “If I do this, I become one of the bad guys. Like you.”

“Maybe.” He shrugged. “Maybe not. Why don’t you just have the kid?”

“Because I don’t want to.”

As far as he was concerned, that was a solid reason, and justified as much as it needed to be. “Why don’t you just tell Guerin?”

“Because I don’t want to,” she repeated.

“Hmm.”

“But I really don’t wanna be like you. Do you see the predicament I’m in?”

“Oh, you’re nothing like me,” he assured her. “I’m far too good-looking, and much smarter. And meaner. I’ve sunk to levels you wouldn’t dream of sinking to. Although if you kill the kid behind Michael’s back, that is pretty bad.”

“I’m not killing anyone,” she said.

He shrugged. She was ending a life, or at least a potential life. What the hell else could it be?

“You know what, Max? Don’t judge me,” she snapped, shooting to her feet. “You’re a guy, and you’re a bad guy at that. You’re never gonna be in my position.”

“Then why’d you come here if you didn’t want me to judge you? Don’t you have anyone else to talk to?” It would be absolutely pathetic if she didn’t.

“Tess is as messed up as I am, and Marty’s in another state.”

“So you want my advice?”

She sat back down and sighed. “I can’t believe I’m gonna say this, but . . . yes.”

He folded his arms across his lap and leaned back in his chair. “If you wanna have an abortion, have it,” he said simply, “and if you wanna keep it a secret from Michael, don’t tell him.”

“Just like that?”

“No, not just like that. It’s gonna haunt you every day for the rest of your life,” he warned, “and trust me, that’s not fun.” He’d done a lot of things that haunted him, and even though he’d never admit it to her face, raping her was first and foremost among them. “Are you ready for that?” He didn’t think she was. She sure as hell didn’t look ready.

“I’m gonna go,” she decided, pushing back the chair. She got up and headed for the door, but before she left, she turned back around and said, “I took a huge risk by coming here today, Max. Please tell me I can trust you not to tell Michael.”

“Oh, Maria. You should never trust me.” She knew that better than almost anyone. “But I won’t say a word.” Actions spoke louder than words, as the saying went, and if he kept her secret, it would be like an apology for the rape without actually saying he was sorry. And that worked for him.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“So I think I may have found someone to replace Maria,” Mr. Buckley announced as he strode out of his office with a stack of applications in hand. He and Michael were the only two in the art museum that afternoon. The guy who was supposed to have been working had backed out to go spend his spring break in Vegas. Since Michael wasn’t having a spring break anymore, he figured he should fill in, pick up some more hours at work.

“Is that the girl with the . . . B.O.?” Michael asked fearfully. He had helped his boss interview all the applicants. The girl with the B.O. had been . . . really something. Not something good.

“No, she’s the girl with the underarm hair,” Mr. Buckley informed him.

“Oh, nice.” An abundance of underarm hair could lead to B.O. so . . . that was just fantastic. “Times like these, I really miss Maria.”

“Yeah. She was good for morale around here,” Mr. Buckley agreed, “and I know you two always enjoyed working together.”

“Oh, you have no idea.” Michael sat down at the front desk and flipped open a catalog. Mr. Buckley had already ordered all their new summer items, but he still enjoyed browsing through.

“Actually, I do have an idea,” Mr. Buckley said, laying the applications down on the empty counter space beside Michael. “Awhile back, I was rewinding the tape from that security camera.” He pointed to a small, nearly hidden camera perched above the front entrance. “Nice homemade porno you two made.”

Although he felt mortified, Michael couldn’t help but smile. That had been a great night, him and Maria alone in this museum, all over each other.

“Don’t worry, I didn’t watch,” his boss assured him. “Much.”

Michael felt himself grow red with embarrassment. “I’m really sorry about that,” he apologized.

“Oh, don’t be. Everybody who works here has sex here at some point. I could tell you some stories . . .”

“Please don’t.”

“I’m just surprised it took you so long.”

Michael laughed lightly. “Okay, you’re officially the best boss ever.” Sex in the workplace was something anyone else might have fired him for.

“Well, I can’t get rid of my top employee,” he said with a shrug. “At least not until after April. I need your paintings for the student exhibit next month.”

“Yeah, don’t worry, I won’t back out on you this time,” Michael reassured him. He’d made the mistake of backing out on his exhibit after Isabel had left him. He wasn’t going to make the same mistake twice.

“That’s good to hear,” Mr. Buckley said. “It was hard enough having your friend Kyle back out on this month’s exhibit.”

“Yeah, he’s kind of got some stuff goin’ on. Not baby drama, but love-of-his-life drama.”

Mr. Buckley nodded. “I remember it well. But a word of advice: If you two stop painting every time something goes wrong with your girlfriends, you might as well give up on your art careers now.”

Michael laughed. “Huh-huh.” But then he thought about it a moment and quit laughing. “Huh.”

“Look, Michael, I just want you to know, as long as I’m in charge of this museum, you’ll have a job here,” Mr. Buckley promised, suddenly serious. “And after your son’s born, if you need more hours, wanna start working full-time, we can arrange that. Although if this new girl’s armpit hair gets any longer, I might have to fire her and hire you full-time anyway.” He chuckled.

Michael laughed with him. That was good to hear. As long as he had a job, he knew he could make it work. He was reluctant to start working full-time since he was still going to school full-time, though. He was hoping he could convince Isabel to find a part-time job. They could work around each other’s schedules when it came time to watching the baby, and he was sure his parents and Kyle would help out with that whenever they could.

“I’m gonna run to the Union and get a sandwich. You want anything?” Mr. Buckley asked.

“No, that’s alright.”

“Okay, hold down the fort.”

“I will,” Michael promised as his boss headed out. He remained at the counter, flipping through the catalog for a few minutes. He yawned and rubbed his forehead, wishing he’d slept last night. He hated working on days when he had no energy.

He looked up from the catalog only when the front door opened and Tess walked in. He couldn’t deny being surprised to see her there. She’d never once set foot in the art museum.

“You look tired,” she remarked right away.

“You, too,” he returned, stashing the catalog away beneath the desk.

“What is that, porn?” she asked, leaning over the desk.

“Well, there are some naked statues, if you wanna look.”

“On a normal day, I would, but . . .” She shook her head. “Today I’m just not in the mood.”

“What’s up?” he asked her.

“Oh, nothing much. I was on my way home from work, drove past and saw your car out front. I figured I’d pop in and say howdy.”

“Howdy?”

“Yeah.” She picked up one of the applications from the stack Mr. Buckley had left, looked it over for a moment, and then said, “Armpit hair?”

“Yeah, she’s the new hire.”

“Fun.” She set the application back down. “So, like I said, you look tired.”

“Yeah, I didn’t sleep much last night.”

“Me, neither.”

“Oh, yeah? Why’s that?”

She waited a moment, then replied, “Big project.”

“Oh.” He nodded in understanding.

“What about you?”

“Uh . . . Isabel thing,” he replied reluctantly. He hadn’t told anyone about the kiss yet, not even Kyle.

“This doesn’t sound good,” Tess mumbled worriedly.

“She kissed me last night.”

“Oh, no. Where?”

“In the bedroom,” he replied. When he realized she wasn’t asking about a location in his apartment so much as a location on his body he amended, “I mean, on the mouth.”

“You never know with her.” She sighed. “Well, did you kiss her back?”

He nodded in admittance. “Yeah.” He wasn’t exactly proud of that fact. “Just for a second.”

“Why would you do that?”

“Because I . . . I wanted to see if it would feel like it used to,” he explained. “But it didn’t.” It felt more wrong than right, and he had no desire for it to happen again.

“Good,” Tess declared.

“Actually, not good. My life would be a hell of a lot easier if I still loved Isabel.”

“But you still love Maria?” she guessed.

“Yes.” He knew he always would.

“Good,” Tess repeated. “That’s . . . really good.”

“Yeah.” He didn’t quite understand what she was getting at. “Tess, are you okay?” From the moment she’d walked in, she’d seemed as though she were there with a purpose, and he doubted that purpose was just to say howdy, as she claimed.

“Huh?” was he response. “Yeah. I’m just kinda . . . it’s been one of those days.”

“Yeah, tell me about it,” he muttered.

“Actually, I should . . . tell you about it,” she said slowly. “I should tell you.”

“Okay . . .” The longer this went on, the more confused he got.

“Michael . . .” She looked at him as though she really wanted to say something, but no other words came out. Michael waited, but she didn’t say anything, and he had no idea what it was she wanted to say.

Mr. Buckley walked back in the museum just then with an already half-eaten BLT in his hand. He waved at Tess and headed back for his office.

“Oh, I should go. You’re at work,” Tess said, turning to leave.

“No, wait, what were you gonna say?”

“Oh . . .” She shook her head. “It’s not important.”

He frowned. Generally, unimportant things were easy to say.

She smiled at him and walked out of the museum. She fled, practically. It was as though she couldn’t get out of there fast enough.

Huh, Michael thought. That was weird. He would have given a little more thought as to what was going on with her had he not had so much else on his mind.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Kyle was in the midst of trying to teach Frank to shake hands that afternoon when there was a knock on his door. He gave Frank a treat for his efforts and went to answer the door. “Hey,” he said when he saw Tess on the other side. She was the last person he’d expected to see standing there. They weren’t on the best of terms, and they hadn’t been for awhile now.

“Hey,” she returned. “You never called me back. I left voicemails.”

“I know.” He’d listened to every single one of them, sometimes more than once. “I was surprised you even wanted to hear from me again after I acted like such a dick.” He hadn’t called her back because he was afraid he’d say something he would regret. He’d been doing that a lot lately.

“You freaked out when you thought I was pregnant,” she said. “It’s not the worst thing a man can do.”

He appreciated her attempt to make him feel better, but he didn’t deserve it. “No, I was a complete jackass to you. I was bordering on Max cruelty there.”

“No, he’s nowhere near that nice.”

He sighed and apologized, “I’m sorry for doubting you.”

“I’m sorry for giving you reasons to doubt me,” she apologized in return, then practically wailed, “Kyle, can I come in?”

She sounded . . . emotional. He wasn’t sure if she was emotional about them or about something else, but it didn’t matter. He missed having her around. “Sure,” he said, stepping aside.

“Thanks,” she said, coming inside.

He shut the door and said, “Can you believe we were supposed to be enjoying spring break in Hawaii right now?”

“I wish we were,” she mumbled, sitting down on the couch. Frank came up to her and pawed at her leg. “Hey, Frank,” she cooed, petting his head. “You’re so cute.”

He nuzzled his nose against her foot.

She laughed a little and asked, “How much have you been feeding him? He’s gotten so fat.”

“Dog likes to eat.” Kyle sat down beside her and gestured towards the cardboard box next to his TV. “Hey, check that out,” he said. “His toy box.” Even though Frank had only been his dog for a few weeks now, he’d spoiled him big time. He’d gone out and bought every dog toy he could find. Rawhide bones, nylon bones, squeaky hamburgers, squeaky tacos and hot dogs and chicken legs. Rope toys. And a plastic foot, which seemed to be Frank’s favorite for some reason.

“Pampered pooch,” Tess remarked, letting the puppy lick the back of her hand. Suddenly she looked up and asked, “Kyle, can I talk to you about something?”

“If you want to.” He wasn’t sure why she would want to since he’d been such a jerk lately, but he was there for her if she needed him.

“Really do,” she insisted. “Okay, first off, this isn’t about me. It’s, like, friend of a friend stuff.”

“Okay.” He decided that he was going to listen and try to be a good friend this time instead of over-reacting and jumping to conclusions like he had when he’d found the pregnancy test box. They had been good friends once, friends who listened to each other and helped each other out. If nothing else, he hoped it was possible for them to be like that again.

“Okay,” she said, wetting her lips with her tongue. “So, say someone knows a secret, and she promises not to say anything. But say it’d be really wrong for the secret not to come out. Like really undeniably wrong. Does the girl have a right to tell the secret to anyone, even if it’s not her secret to tell?”

Kyle frowned. It was hard to formulate a response to such a vague scenario. “Well, it depends,” he said. “What’s the secret?”

“I promised I wouldn’t tell you.”

“I thought you said this was friend of a friend stuff.”

She bit her bottom lip, caught in a fib.

“What’s going on?” he asked. “You’re being very . . . secretive.”

“I would tell you if I could, but I can’t.”

“Okay then, two questions: Whose secret is this, and who are you thinkin’ about telling?”

She shook her head slowly. “You’re just gonna have to accept the ambiguity. I’m sorry.”

He wished she could tell him more, but he wasn’t going to force her. “Alright. But this sounds shady. It’s got Max and Liz written all over it.”

“Okay, let’s just say that’s true,” she said. “Say I made a promise to . . . to Liz, and it’s a promise I may not be able to keep. Would that be really bad of me?”

“No, it’s not like Liz is your best friend or anything,” he said. “And if Max is the guy you’re thinkin’ about tellin’ . . . it’s not like he’s a good person who deserves any ounce of respect.”

“Right,” she said. “Right.” She slapped her hands down on her lap and stood up. “Well, thank you, Kyle,” she said, heading for the door. “This has helped . . . a little. Bye, Frank.”

“Tess,” he said, rising to his feet as well. He made his way towards her and advised, “Weigh the pros and cons of telling the secret and not telling it, and then do what you feel, regardless of who it’s gonna piss off or stress out. In the end, all you can do is what you think is right.” He knew Tess, and despite the mistakes she had made, she was a good person with a good conscience and a good head on her shoulders. She would do the right thing.

“Thanks, Kyle,” she said, smiling at him. “This has actually helped a lot.”

He was just happy to be of assistance. It felt good to feel like they were friends again, even if they weren’t.









TBC . . .

-April
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LOVE IS MICHAEL AND MARIA.
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April
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Part 68

Post by April »

Hey, everyone! There was this stupid fire alert in my apartment building, and we all had to go outside for about fifteen minutes. I took my computer and my purse and al my seasons of OTH with me. You know, just the bare necessities. :lol:

First off, I need to thank everyone who bid on me in the auction, but I need to give SARAH a special thanks for buying me in the auction! I think one of the fiercest (fierce, BB ;) ) battles in the whole auction came between you and Nove at the very last second! Nove, you put up a really good fight! You two were maniacs! :lol:

Krista:
But I rather like tequathisy's reason for Liz being horrible for continuing to sleep with Max. She pretty much is betraying her friend, and that's a better reason than I've seen from others. But then, I don't think Liz really considered Maria a friend. Really. Maybe an aquiantance that she sometimes talked to.
Yeah, Liz and Maria were never really close friends. All their conversations seemed to revolve around who they were having sex with at the time. But they were still friends on some level.
I'm eager to know exactly why Isabel is so determined to get back with Michael. He's no richer than Alex now. And Isabel could easily dig her claws into another rich man to take care of her kid. So what's the deal?
Well, as hard as it is to fathom that 521-Isabel actually has feelings, she does have feelings. For Michael. It's not just about the baby and about money for her. She actually . . . really cares about him, in her own twisted way.

nibbles:
I really do feel for Tess right now. It's such a hard position to be in. Abortion is such an emotional and moral quagmire that there's no right answer. It's impossible for her to give objective advice to Maria. Not that Maria wants to hear much objective advice right now. I honestly don't know what I'd do in her position.
I don't know what I'd do in Tess's position, either. I've gone back and forth on the issue in my head a million times, and I still don't know. It sucks for her to have to go through that.

Leila:
Haha..Isabel messed up a bit.
Yeah, she did. She kind of got ahead of herself. She's starting to get impatient with Michael.

Christina:
You're brave, though April. Writing about these topics. I commend you and your mastery.
Oh, thank you! When I decided I was going to address abortion in this fic, I was really nervous about it. But I'm not so nervous about it anymore.

killjoy:
As far as I'm concerned this Maria has no spine what so ever.
I think she does have a spine, she's just lost that spine right now. And she can't seem to get it back. She has, in all fairness to her, gone through some pretty hard stuff lately, and an unplanned pregnancy would be difficult for anyone to deal with. But I think you're right that she may be feeling too sorry for herself. Like in that last part, she was saying that she wound up in second place with Michael, and that she can't take care of a baby because she's still a kid herself. And neither one of those things is true. She could get her life back on track if she really tried.

Ginger:
Great reading before Mass on Sunday
:lol:
Seriously though, Max telling Maria that this would haunt her forever...now that's a shock. Didn't know anything haunted Max or that he would know anything could, what kind of ground work are you laying for us on this one?
I don't know if I was laying any "ground work," really, but I just kind of wanted to resolve the Max/Maria stuff without actually resolving anything. ;) Did that make sense? No, lol.

Alison:
Why else would she go to Max, the most unscrupulous, evil person she's ever met (besides Isabel) to have him tell her that what she's doing is ok? She needs someone to tell her that what's she doing is ok, even when she knows that it isn't. Aborting Michael's baby behind his back is all sorts of wrong, and she knows it.
Exactly, she wanted assurance, and he was the most likely person to offer that assurance. But he didn't. Not really.

I love making your head hurt. ;)

Nove:
What I found most profound, and I think it was quite genius of you, Maria went to the "devil" for advice. Not just any advice but advice on doing something she seems to feel in her heart of hearts is the wrong decision and she was hoping for some justification for it. Something that could make her believe wrong can be right. Loved that paradox.
Thank you!
So Tess gained tons of respect from me today and I would totally be beside her 100% if she decides to come clean to Michael.
Yeah, I don't think anyone can argue that Tess would be doing something wrong if she told Michael. But we all seem to agree that Maria would be doing something wrong if she aborted the baby without informing Michael.

Trixie:
Isabel's insistence to become close to Michael has become downright weird. We all know he's adorable, hot and a totally great guy, but her persistence to get back together with him has to have some backstory.
I'll tell you the same thing I told Krista: Isabel actually does have real feelings for Michael. And that's where the weirdness is coming from. During my author's chat, I told people that Isabel was going to get creepier, and she does. And the reason why she gets creepier is that her feelings for him start to come out more and more.

POM:
*Yess, Tess seems a little iffy--there is a 89% chance that she will tell Michael, about Maria behind her back--which will only turn her aganst Maria once again...*
An 89% that she will tell Michael? I like the randomness of that figure. ;)

Neve:
I think Tess is reacting exactly as I would in her situation. She doesn't want Maria to go through with the abortion but has to be supportive at the same time. I think that's why she's pushing so hard for Maria to tell Michael about the baby. She wants him to change her mind.
Yeah, in addition to it being the morally right thing to do, Tess knows that Michael could change Maria's mind, and that he's probably the one person who could change Maria's mind.

Sara:
I am so glad Tess went to see Kyle.....I think this is going to help tremendously.
Yep, it was a step in the right direction for them. A small step, but an important step nonetheless. ;)

Eva:
At last Isabel took a step too much!
Her patience is starting to wear thin.

Sarah: I'm interested to see what your spoiler question for this will be. Or maybe you'll go spoiler-free. PM me when you decide what you want to ask, you winner. :D



I just want to warn you guys, that this is probably one of the most infuriating parts of the story. For those of you who were at my author's chat, remember how I said that things were going to get worse? This is where they get worse. But you've all read so much of this now that, if you don't keep reading, I'll have to hunt you down and kill you, so . . . :lol: Keep reading. And resist the urge to hunt me down and kill me, because you may want to after this part.









Part 68








Maria broke out a carton of cookie dough ice cream and the second season of Beverly Hills 90210 late that afternoon. She’d had a long day, one that was full of disturbing, often conflicting thoughts, and she just needed to crash. She curled up on the couch under the blanket and reveled in the laziness of it all. She was only fifteen minutes into the episode and a quarter of the way through the carton of ice cream when Tess walked in, though.

“You’re home late,” Maria remarked, barely glancing up from the TV.

“Yeah.” Tess took off her coat, seemingly calm until she threw it down on the floor and growled, “If you don’t tell Michael about this pregnancy, I will.”

Maria just sat there on the couch, the words reverberating off the walls of her mind as Tess stormed into her bedroom and slammed the door. For a moment, she felt frozen in disbelief. Would Tess really tell Michael? How could she do that? They were supposed to be best friends. If she told him . . .

Maria shut off the TV, set her ice cream down, and stomped into Tess’s bedroom. “Now I get it,” she bit out angrily. “The only reason why you claimed to have my back was so you could stick a knife in it.”

“That’s not what I’m doing,” Tess denied.

“Isn’t it?”

“No! If I’m forced into telling Michael because you won’t, then I’ll do it, because it’s the right thing to do. Having an abortion without telling him is clearly wrong. You can’t even dispute that.”

Maria wasn’t trying to dispute that. “What’s worse, huh?” she asked. “Me, lying to Michael by omission or you lying to my face?

“I never lied to you!” Tess yelled. “I promised I’d support you throughout this pregnancy, and I meant it. But then all of a sudden last night, you told me you’re not even gonna have a pregnancy anymore. And even though your decision doesn’t jive with my personal beliefs, I would’ve still managed to support you; but I draw the line at not telling Michael. I refuse to be an accessory.”

“Why do you have to be such a bitch about all this?”

I’m the bitch?” Tess huffed. “How can you say these things to me? Do you know all I’ve done for you? Do you care?” Her voice started to waver as tears shone in her eyes. “You’re my best friend, and I think of you like a sister, but I hate who you’re becoming right now!”

“A good sister would never betray me,” Maria pointed out furiously.

“And a good best friend would be my best friend without expecting anything in return!” Tess shouted. “When you realize I’m only looking out for you, maybe you can grow the hell up and apologize.”

Maria grunted. “Screw that.” She wasn’t about to apologize for anything she was doing. “And screw your pathetic excuse for your betrayal. You’re not looking out for me; you’re looking out for you. You screwed things up with Kyle, and now you’re trying to alleviate your guilt.”

Tess made a face. “What?”

“Yeah. You lied to him, led him on. While he was thinking you were soul mates, you were thinking, ‘Wow, this is great rebound sex.’” Maria knew she was hurting Tess by lashing out like this, but she couldn’t stop herself. She just couldn’t stop. She needed someone to blame and someone to yell at, and right now, Tess was that person. “You figure, if you tell Michael the truth, it’ll all balance out. All better. But that’s a Band-Aid for a bullet wound, honey. At this point, you and Kyle aren’t ever getting back together.”

“And at this point, you’re making Isabel Evans look like Michael’s classier option,” Tess retorted.

“Don’t you dare tell him anything,” Maria growled. She had no right. It wasn’t up to her.

“I’m going to!”

“If you tell Michael about this baby, we’re no longer friends,” she threatened, and she wasn’t sure if she meant it or not.

“Fine,” Tess said. “Then pack your stuff and drag what’s left of your dignity out of my apartment.”

Somehow, Maria hadn’t expected to hear that. She thought that Tess would reconsider things if she were faced with the possibility of losing her. But either she was just really determined, or she valued doing the right thing over their twenty-one year friendship.

“Fine,” she choked out, trying to keep her emotions inside. “I’ll leave tomorrow.” She whirled around and stormed back out into the living room. This was bad. This was terrifyingly bad. She was pregnant, and now she was about to be homeless and friendless, too.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Max invited Liz over to his place that night to try out the new pool table he had bought. Right now it was sitting in his living room. He planned on putting it in his billiard room when he bought a house, though. Because his house was going to have a billiard room.

“How much did this cost?” Liz asked, running her fingers across the felt top of the table. She had been sitting on top of it for awhile now, creating a very effective obstacle as he tried to sink all the balls.

“A lot,” he replied, positioning his cue stick. “Would you move your ass so I can sink this eight-ball?”

“Shoot around my ass,” she told him.

“Usually I shoot straight into it.” He grinned and took a shot. He missed the eight-ball, wide to the right.

“So how’s work?” she asked randomly.

“Stressful, frustrating,” he answered, chalking up the tip of his cue stick again. “When I took over the company, I had all these plans for expansion, but so far, any money I’ve made I’ve had to use to help reconcile my father’s debt.”

“Oh, that’s gotta suck.”

“Yeah, but we’re not any more in debt today than we were a month ago, so I guess that’s good.” He shrugged and took another shot. Wide to the left this time.

“When are you gonna fire Roger?” she asked.

“Soon,” he replied. “He keeps giving me these looks like he wants to have sex with me.”

She laughed. “You mean kinda like the look I’m giving you right now?”

He was surprised he hadn’t noticed, but she was in fact giving him one of those looks. Eyes locked with his, head tilted down, lips gently parted, chest stuck out.

“Yeah,” he said. “It’s a lot sexier coming from you.”

She stuck out one leg and traced her foot up and down along his crotch. “I’ve never done it on a pool table before,” she said.

“Me neither, come to think of it.”

“You wanna?”

He grinned and remarked, “Slutty. But it depends. Are you my girlfriend again?”

“I’m your girl,” she told him. “I don’t think I’ll ever call myself your friend.”

He set his cue stick down on the table, picked up the eight ball, and dropped it in one of the side pockets. “I want us to be together, Liz,” he said in all seriousness.

“I want that, too,” she returned, “even though I shouldn't. So let’s be together on top this pool table.” She grabbed him by his shirt collar and pulled him towards her. He hopped up on the pool table and kissed her, but the moment was screwed up when he started thinking about Maria. It wasn’t as though he were thinking about her in a sexy way or anything. He was thinking about the fact that she was pregnant, and sex was the thing that had made her pregnant.

She pulled away from the kiss slightly, seeming to sense that something was off. “What?” she asked.

“Nothing, it’s just . . .” He shifted uncomfortably. He’d promised Maria he wouldn’t say anything, and strangely enough, that was a promise he intended to keep. He wasn’t even going to tell Liz. “I sort of think of sex differently now,” he explained.

“Why?”

“Well . . . ‘cause my sister’s pregnant.”

She made a face and pointed out, “You didn’t think of it any differently in the pool the other night. Or in Phoenix last week.”

That had been before he’d known about Maria. “Well, girls get knocked up all the time,” he said. “It doesn’t take much. One small slip of the semen and Max Jr. enters the world.”

“Don’t you have condoms?” she asked.

“Yeah.”

“I have condoms, too, if you run out.” She smiled. “Some are neon.”

“Liz . . .” He felt embarrassed, but this was pretty much a typical guy thing. Once you started to think of sex as baby-making, it seemed different.

“Oh my god,” she said. “You really don’t wanna have sex tonight.”

“No, I do,” he insisted, “it’s just . . . I really don’t wanna pull a Michael Guerin.”

“Then pull out,” she suggested.

“That doesn’t work.” That was probably what Michael had done. He saw that disappointed look on Liz’s face, though, the sexy pout, and he did want to fuck her. As much as she could never resist him, he could never resist her, either. “Alright, do me a favor,” he said. “Let me lube up for anal and I’ll go down on you later.”

She smiled and rolled her eyes. “Deal.” She grabbed his shirt and lay back, pulling him down on top of her.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria shoved her clothes in a duffle bag. They weren’t all going to fit in there. She had two suitcases full of clothes already, and she’d probably have to pack up another duffle bag full of her bras and underwear. She hated packing. She hated moving from one place to another like this. She was like a fucking nomad, and she wanted to have a home again.

Tess came to stand in the doorway. Maria pretended not to notice her.

“Where are you gonna go?” her friend asked.

“I don’t know,” Maria mumbled, zipping up the duffle. “Wherever.”

“Are you gonna go stay with Kyle?”

The thought had crossed her mind last night, but she had decided against it. “No.” She would be way too close to Michael and Isabel if she lived with Kyle. Besides, things were about to get even more dramatic, and Kyle didn’t manage drama well.

“Are you gonna stay in a hotel?” Tess continued to question.

“I really haven’t thought about it.” Maria set the duffle bag down on the floor and crossed the room to her dresser. She pulled open the bottom drawer and lifted it out. It was a lightweight drawer, just full of undergarments.

“You have to think about it,” Tess said.

“Yeah, ‘cause you kicked me out,” Maria muttered, setting the drawer down on her bed, keeping her back turned towards Tess. She wasn’t going to miss that bed. It wasn’t comfy, and the headboard fell down on her about every other night. It wasn’t as nice as Michael’s bed.

“Maria . . .”

“Don’t worry, I can handle this,” she assured her, though she wasn’t sure if that was true or not. She was pretty much living one day at a time, and the days weren’t getting any easier. “I’ve done it all before. Remember when I moved out in October, moved in with Michael, befriended Kyle? Core Four and all that.” She sighed longingly. “That all worked out okay. Except that none of us are happy and half of us are parents now.”

“I never wanted it to come to this,” Tess said softly.

“Well, it did.” Maria picked up her duffle bag again and unzipped it. If she scrunched her clothes down a little more, she would probably be able to fit her bras and underwear in there.

“I’m gonna wait a few days before I say anything to Michael, give you the chance to do the right thing,” Tess told her. “But if you choose not to, I’m gonna follow through and tell him like I said I would.”

Maria grunted and finally turned around to face her friend. “Don’t bother,” she grumbled. “I’m gonna tell him today.”

“What?”

She shrugged. “I’m gonna tell him I’m pregnant.” It wasn’t as though she had much of a choice on that now, thanks to Tess.

“Really? Maria, that’s great. I’m so proud of you,” Tess exclaimed. Her eyes traveled down to the duffle bag, though, and she frowned. “But wait a minute, why are you still moving out?”

“Telling Michael isn’t gonna fix you and me. We both said some hurtful things, and it’s too late to take them back.”

“So, what, our friendship’s just over?”

Maria walked out of the room, brushing past her friend. “Think of it this way,” she said as she strode into the living room. “Now you can focus on Kyle and get back to leading a normal life. I’ll be out of your way.” She threw on a light jacket and slipped into her sandals. This is for the best, she thought. I have to get out of here.

“Maria, I didn’t mean it. You don’t have to go.”

“I didn’t mean what I said about you and Kyle. You two will be together again. I know it.”

Tess looked at her pleadingly and said, “Maria . . . stay.”

Maria shook her head and warned, “You’re not gonna want me here.” After she talked to Michael, the shit was going to hit the fan big time, and the best thing anyone could do was just get out of dodge. “I’ll be back later to finish packing,” she said as she headed out the door.

“Maria, wait--”

She shut the door, pulled her jacket tight around herself, and prepared herself for what was going to be the hardest conversation of her entire life. But she knew what she had to say.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Kyle strode into Michael’s apartment that afternoon with two beers in hand. “What an awesome spring break,” he muttered sarcastically.

“Yeah, really,” Michael agreed. He was sitting on the couch watching an infomercial on TV. Hawaii would have been a lot more exciting.

“I haven’t had a spring break this lame since . . . well, last year.” Kyle smiled and handed Michael a beer. “Here.”

“You drink now?” Michael asked, popping the tab.

“Recreationally,” Kyle replied, slinging himself over the back of the couch. He sat down beside Michael and sighed. “Yeah, ever since I lost my virginity in a less than sober stupor, I’ve learned to hold my alcohol.”

“Busch Light. Not that much alcohol to hold,” Michael pointed out.

“I know, I know.” Kyle suddenly craned his neck back and looked down the hallway. “Whoa, speaking of bush . . . did you know your baby mama’s walkin’ around naked?”

“What?” Michael glanced down the hallway as well, but Isabel had already slipped into the bedroom.

“Yeah, she just strolled out of the bathroom without a stitch on.” Kyle grinned. “I liked it.”

Michael shook his head. “No, she’s gotta stop doing that.”

“Why? It was kinda nice.”

Michael took a drink. “I think she thinks we’re gonna get back together, and I don’t want that.”

“Oh, well, fair enough, but if she’s gonna pull back the curtains, you might as well enjoy the view. You know what I mean?”

Michael took another drink. First the kiss and now this. Great.

“You afraid you’re gonna give into temptation?” Kyle asked.

“No, it’s not even that I’m tempted to be with Isabel. But I might be tempted to settle for Isabel,” he explained, “for our son’s sake. It’d be a lot easier to raise him if we were married someday.”

Kyle sat straight up. “Whoa, hold on.”

“No, I’m not saying I wanna marry her.”

“Okay, good. ‘Cause if you’re not happy, you’re not doin’ your son any favors.”

Michael sighed. “I know.” He set his beer down on the end table and raked one hand through his hair, tired of talking about himself. “Hey, enough about me,” he said. “What’s goin’ on with you and Tess? Anything?”

“Nothin’,” Kyle replied, “or next to nothing, I guess. She stopped by yesterday, though, to talk.”

“Progress.”

“I don’t know, it wasn’t exactly a romantic conversation. But yeah, I guess it’s progress,” he acknowledged. “I’m actually kinda worried about her, though. I think she got herself caught up in some Max and Liz drama.”

“Oh, no.”

“Yeah. She kept goin’ on and on about some secret, and how she thinks she should tell it . . . or not tell it.” He shrugged. “I don’t know, it was confusing.”

Michael thought back to the impromptu visit Tess paid him at the art museum yesterday, how she’d said she needed to tell him something, something she later claimed wasn’t important. “Huh,” he said contemplatively. “She was acting kinda weird around me yesterday, too. I wonder what’s going on.”

“She wouldn’t say.”

Michael was mulling it over, trying to think of a possible answer when his phone rang. He took it out of his pocket and glanced at the Caller ID.

“Who’s that?” Kyle asked.

He could barely believe it. He had to stare at the number for a long time, even though he recognized it right away. “It’s Maria.”

“Oh, I’m gone with the wind!” Kyle announced, springing up from the couch. With his beer in hand, he fled the apartment.

Michael took a deep breath and tried to calm himself, but his heart was already beating out of control. He didn’t know why she was calling him, but that didn’t matter. He was just thrilled to hear her voice. “Hello?” he answered his phone.

“Hey,” she said quietly.

God, he missed her. “Hey,” he returned.

“It’s me.”

“I know.” As though he’d ever forget the sound of her voice. An awkward silence overtook the both of them, and he didn’t know what to say, so he said the first thing that came to mind. “How’s it going?” he asked, immediately wishing he hadn’t. How’s it going? Stupid.

“Um . . . not so good, really,” Maria replied.

“Oh.” He wondered why that was. Was that her way of saying she missed him, or was there something bigger going on? “You okay?”

She didn’t say anything in response to that, and he started to worry. Clearly she wasn’t okay.

“I need to see you,” she said. “Today. Now. Right now, if that’s possible.”

“Oh, uh . . .” He felt flustered. He hadn’t expected this to be anything other than a regular day, but if he went to see Maria, it’d be anything but regular. “Yeah, sure,” he said. “Are you at your place?”

“No, I’m at that coffee shop a couple blocks south of campus,” she told him. “Or north, or east or west. I don’t know, I don’t do directions.”

Michael laughed a little. “No, I-I think I know the place you’re talking about. I can be there in ten minutes.”

“Okay,” she said. “I’ll see you.” She hung up the phone before either of them could say another word.

He closed his phone, not sure what to think. On the one hand, he felt apprehensive about whatever it was she needed to see him about, but mostly, he was just looking forward to seeing her again.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Isabel stood at the end of the hallway in the bedroom, the door open just enough for her to peer out. She watched as Michael shot up, accidentally knocking a beer can over onto the carpet. He picked it up and set it back down on the end table but didn’t even bother to stop and clean up the mess. He usually tried to keep his apartment looking perfect, but apparently he had bigger things on his mind. He grabbed his keys, through on a jacket, shoved his feet into some shoes, and practically flew out of the apartment. He didn’t even stop to tell her he was leaving or say where he was going. But she already knew. She’d been listening to his conversation, and she could tell just by the tone of his voice that he was talking to Maria. Fucking knocked up Maria.

Isabel closed the bedroom door and leaned back against it, frowning worriedly. She felt like the evil queen in Snow White. She wanted to be the fairest one of all, but the prince had a different girl in mind.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria sat at the Kopeli coffee shop, a mass of nerves and apprehension. She’d chosen to talk to Michael here because it was a public place, and they were less likely to fight and make a scene in a public place. Plus, no one she knew ever went to that coffee shop. She wanted to keep it as low-key as possible.

Her waitress came up to her and offered to re-fill her coffee. “No, thanks,” she said, shaking her head, gripping the mug tightly in her hands. She’d barely been able to stomach the first cup. It was really horrible. Everything was horrible.

She sighed heavily, feeling her heart thudding inside her chest. She felt as though her whole body were shaking with each and every beat. No matter how much she tried to calm herself, she couldn’t. Her palms were sweating, and her fingertips were trembling, and she was pretty sure she would have fainted had she been standing up.

Looking out the window didn’t help much. Every time a guy who looked like Michael walked by, she tensed up. She knew he was getting there as fast as he could, but it wasn’t fast enough. She just wanted to get this over with. It was probably going to be the hardest thing she’d ever do in her life. Or maybe the abortion would be the hardest thing.

She pressed one hand to her stomach and rubbed it gently. She wanted to hate that baby for how much it was screwing up her life, but she didn’t. She couldn’t.

She felt him enter the coffee shop before she heard or saw him. She looked over her shoulder and there he was, walking in the door. His eyes settled on her almost immediately, and he smiled a little. She didn’t have it in her to smile back.

He looks tired, she thought as he approached her. She gripped her coffee mug with both hands again, tightly.

“Twelve minutes,” he said as he slid into the booth across from her. He had a warm, friendly look in his eyes, and she realized in that moment just how much of a nice guy he was. He didn’t even have to do anything and he was . . . just an amazing person.

“What?” She suddenly felt dazed.

“It took me twelve minutes to get here, not ten,” he said. “I would’ve gotten here sooner if I hadn’t gotten stuck behind this soccer mom. She was goin’ slow, which is weird, ‘cause usually soccer moms move right along, you know?”

I’ll never be a soccer mom, she thought determinedly. Never.

“I gotta admit, I was kinda surprised to hear from you,” he said, “not that I mind.”

Her stomach felt as though it were twisted in knots. She wanted to be anywhere else.

“So what’s up?” he asked. “Why’d you need to see me?”

Just tell him, she thought, opening her mouth. Just say it. But no words came out. She kept opening and closing her mouth, but it was just silence, and he started to look concerned. Tell him, she thought again. Say what you came to say. He was going to hear it from somebody, and he had to hear it from her.

“I’m pregnant.”

His eyebrows shot up, and his eyes grew wider, but everything else about him froze. “What?”

She didn’t want to say it again. He’d heard her.

The silence that had plagued her moments ago encompassed him as he looked away from her. He made a couple sounds of disbelief and then sighed, seemingly stunned. She tried to read his expression, but she couldn’t. It was a mixture of shock and fear, mostly, and he probably thought he was dreaming, having some sort of nightmare.

I’m sorry, Michael, she thought. I’m so sorry. She downcast her eyes and said, “It’s not yours.”

His head shot up abruptly, and he frowned. “What--” he choked out, and it was just a whisper. A confused, desperate whisper.

It was a lie, and it was the biggest lie she could have told. But she needed him to believe her. “I’m sorry,” she choked out. “I have to go.” She slid out of the booth and tried to walk away.

“No, Maria, wait!” he called, coming after her. He grabbed her arm and pulled her back to him. “I don’t . . .” He shook his head and gazed at her with pleading eyes, as though he were begging her to help him understand.

She pulled her arm out of his grasp and slowly backed away from him. She felt like a monster.

“I don’t understand,” he said, his voice lined with tears. “How . . .?” He just kept shaking his head and staring at her.

He was definitely a good guy. Way too good for her. She turned her back and walked away from him, because there was nothing more she could say. If she tried to say anything, she was going to break down and start sobbing and admit she wasn’t telling the truth.

Once she was outside the coffee shop, she ran to her car, climbed in, and cried as she drove away.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria had to force the zipper shut on her largest suitcase. Her eyes were so cloudy with tears that she couldn’t even see what she was doing, and she accidentally pinched her finger in the zipper. “Dammit!” she cried, slamming her hands down atop the suitcase. She slumped forward and continued to wail. All she could picture in her mind was the hurt look on Michael’s face as he tried to understand everything she’d just thrown at him, a mixture of truth and lies.

“Maria?”

She breathed in sharply and stood up straighter when she heard Tess enter the apartment.

“Are you still here?” her friend called as she headed down the hallway. “Did you already leave?”

Maria wiped the tears off her cheeks, though she wasn’t sure why. It wasn’t as though she could disguise the fact that she’d been crying.

“Maria?” Tess poked her head into the bedroom, and one look at Maria was enough for her to conclude, “You told him.”

Maria frowned. She should’ve never told anyone. When Tess asked her if she was pregnant, she should have just denied it all and gone to get the abortion without telling anyone.

“Good for you,” Tess said. “What’d he say?”

Maria sniffled. “What.”

“Huh?”

“What. He said what. And then he said it again.”

“Oh.” Tess nodded. “Well, that’s a . . . pretty natural reaction, wouldn’t you say?”

Maria shrugged. “I guess.” She motioned towards the assortment of suitcases and bags strewn throughout her room and asked, “Will you help me bring these out into the living room?”

“Sure.” Tess slung one duffle over her right shoulder and rolled a suitcase out into the living room with her left hand. Maria followed with the suitcase she had just finished zipping. Either it was really heavy or she just had no energy left, because just rolling that suitcase into the other room felt exhausting.

“What else did he say?” Tess asked as she went back for the remaining bags.

“Not much.” The poor guy seemed like he had been too shocked to even know what to say.

“Well, what else did you say?”

Maria bristled as the words echoed in her mind again. It’s not yours. It’s not yours, it’s not yours. “I don’t wanna talk about it,” she mumbled in a rush.

Tess walked back out into the living room loaded down like a little pack horse. She’d carried out Maria’s backpack, second duffle bag, and last suitcase all in one trip. She set the items down and said, “Well, I just want you to know, I’m really proud of you for being honest with him. I can only imagine how nerve-wracking it was.”

“Yeah, you can only imagine,” Maria agreed. She hoped for Tess’s sake that she was never in this kind of situation, because she wouldn’t wish it on her worst enemy.

“You know, you really don’t have to leave,” Tess told her. “Actually, I’d prefer if you didn’t.”

“Yeah, you say that now.”

“No, I mean it.” Tess frowned in confusion. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Maria shook her head. “You won’t be proud of me for long.” She knew for a fact that Tess was going to freak out when she learned about this new lie she was telling.

“Maria, if you have an abortion . . . I can support that decision now that Michael’s informed.”

“He’s not informed.”

Tess looked as though she were trying her hardest to understand, making up explanations for Maria’s odd behavior in her head. “Well, yeah, I guess that’s probably a different conversation. You don’t wanna bombard him with the news all at once. Give him time to adjust to this new reality before he helps you make a decision about an abortion. Good idea, Maria.”

Maria looked away.

Tess halfway cringed. “Good idea, me?”

Maria rubbed her forehead. She had the worst headache of her entire life.

Suddenly, there was a loud and forceful knock on the door, followed by Michael’s voice. “Maria?”

Maria tensed. “Did you lock that door?” she asked Tess.

“Yeah, for once.”

Maria breathed a sigh of relief.

“Maria, if you’re in there . . . open up,” Michael said.

“Aren’t you gonna let him in?” Tess asked.

“No,” Maria whimpered.

“Why not?”

“Because.”

“Maria?” Michael called again. “Tess? Come on, would one of you let me in?”

Tess moved as though she were going to do just that.

“What’re you doing?” Maria demanded in a whisper, stepping in front of her.

“I’m gonna let him in.”

“No, Tess, you cannot do that.”

“I can’t?”

“Please,” Maria begged. If she even saw Michael right now, she’d probably die. “Let’s just stay quiet and pretend we’re not here,” she suggested. “He’ll leave eventually.”

“What? Maria, this is pointless. You guys have so much to talk about. You should . . . you know, talk.”

Maria stared at the door, listening as the knocking began to let up and eventually stopped altogether.

“What’re you not telling me?” Tess asked her.

“I think he’s gone.”

“Maria.”

“What?”

Tess narrowed her eyes at her suspiciously. “You did tell him, didn’t you?”

“Yes, why do you think he was at the door?” Her cell phone rang, and she pulled it out of her pocket and silenced the ringer. “See, look at this.” She held up the phone for her friend to see that Michael was the one calling. “See? I told him.”

“Okay, then why are you avoiding him? Did he react that badly?”

She shut off her phone and slid it back in her pocket. “He reacted fine.” He hadn’t yelled or cried or complained that his life was over; and being that he had another kid about to be born any day now, he had ever reason to react badly.

“Maria, what exactly did you say?”

“I . . . told him I was pregnant,” she replied simply.

“And?”

She sighed. There was no point in not telling her. She’d find out sooner or later. “I told him it’s not his baby.”

What?” Tess shrieked.

“Shh!” Maria hissed. Michael could have still been out in the hallway.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I meant what?!” Tess shrieked again. “You told him it’s not his baby? Why would you do that? It is his baby.” A look of horror crashed across her face. “Oh my god, it is, isn’t it?”

Yes. It’s one-hundred percent without a doubt his baby. We both know this.”

“But he doesn’t!”

“And that’s fine.”

“That’s fine?” Tess echoed incredulously. “Have you lost your mind?”

“Just a little bit.”

“This makes no sense. Why would you tell him he’s not the father when he is the father?”

“I have my reasons,” Maria assured her.

“Well then, explain them to me because I don’t get it!”

Maria sighed and sat down atop her suitcase. This talk wasn’t much more enjoyable than the one she’d just had with Michael. “You were right,” she admitted. “He was gonna find out about this pregnancy one way or another. If I didn’t tell him myself, you were going to, and if you didn’t, Isabel probably would’ve. And if she didn’t . . . well, actually, I don’t think Max would’ve said anything.”

“Max?” Tess resounded. “Max knows?”

“Yeah, I told him.”

“Are you crazy?” Tess yelled. “Of course you are. I don’t know why I even bothered to ask.”

“I told Michael I was pregnant so that he’d hear it from me.”

“Great, but then you lied to him.”

“Had to.”

Tess rolled her eyes and laughed angrily. “This should be good.”

“If Michael knew this was his baby, he’d do everything in his power to keep me from having an abortion,” Maria explained, “and knowing him, he’d probably talk me out of it.”

“Which, in case you’ve forgotten, isn’t necessarily a bad thing.”

“But I don’t wanna be talked out of it. I wanna get rid of this baby and get my life back to normal.”

“But this isn’t the way to go about it,” Tess protested.

“It’s my way to go about it.”

“It’s a fucked up way to go about it!” Tess roared. “You’re expecting Michael to believe you cheated on him? He’s too smart. He’s gonna see right through that.”

“No, he won’t. Michael hates cheaters. He’ll be too busy seeing red to see the truth,” Maria argued. “Or, here’s a thought, he doesn’t even have to know how far along I am, so I’ll just lie and say--”

More lies?” Tess cut in.

“I’ll just lie and say I hooked up with a guy right after we broke up. Like right after. That’s more believable, and it’ll still piss him off.”

“Maria, do you hear yourself? This is like insanity.”

“No, it’s a good plan,” Maria insisted. “It’ll work.”

“Well, I’ll tell you what: You’re right about one thing,” Tess said. “He is gonna be furious. But if the thought of you hooking up with some other guy makes him so mad, how mad do you think he’s gonna be when I tell him this is all a lie? A selfish lie so you can end his child’s life without him knowing about it!”

Maria stood back up and shrugged. “Go ahead. Tell him. It’ll be your word against mine.”

“Isabel could back me up,” Tess pointed out.

“No, she couldn’t. I never denied to Isabel that I was pregnant with Michael’s baby, but I never actually confirmed it, either.” And she had done that on purpose in case a situation like this arose. “And as for DNA . . . I’ll abort this kid before he can even think to ask for a paternity test. And then he’ll never know.”

“But we will,” Tess reminded her. “We’ll always know. And the guilt you carry around from this is gonna be a lot harder to carry around than that baby is.”

Maria didn’t want to think about that.

“Oh, and guess what? There’s gonna be no hope for you and Michael after this. Enjoy your front row seat at his wedding to Isabel. You earned it.”

“It’s not like there’s any hope for us anyway,” she muttered dejectedly.

“There is, but you don’t see it. You just don’t see it.” Tess shook her head sadly. “You know what I think, Maria? I think you’re so determined to do things your own way that you can’t even slow down and admit you’re wrong.”

“I’m not saying I’m not wrong. I’m saying I don’t care,” Maria declared.

Tess started to cry. “I can’t believe you,” she whimpered. “I just can’t believe this is you.”

“Trust me, I’m not liking it, either,” Maria assured her.

“What’re you gonna do when he asks you who the father is, huh?” she questioned. “And you know it’s him. And he’s looking at you and he’s begging you to tell him the truth. What’re you gonna do then? Are you just gonna blurt out a random name and see how much it hurts him?”

“I have in someone in mind,” Maria said. A random name was good, but a calculated name was better.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Billy trudged to the front door, zipping up his pants, his cigarette dangling between his teeth. He opened the door, and on the other side stood a smoking hot girl he thought he’d never see again.

Maria looked him right in the eye and said, “I need your help.”








TBC . . .

-April
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LOVE IS MICHAEL AND MARIA.
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April
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Part 69

Post by April »

Ooh, I'm getting this part out right on time! I didn't even allow time for stalking today!

Leila:
Great part. It gets worse and worse....I love it.
:lol:
As for Isabel, I think her 'love' for Michael is turning into the obsesseion of being with him and having a future with him. Her behaviour towards him is getting more and more unpredictable. The kiss in the last part showed that she was getting careless. It should be interesting to see how it goes on.
Isabel is definitely getting impatient and frustrated that Michael isn't giving in to her again. So you're right that she got careless in the last part. She kind of messed up, took things too fast.
ETA: Sexy signature and avatar...I love the colors in your avi.
Thanks! I don't know why I can never stick with one avi for long. :lol:

Sara:
You've made Maria this character I don't even know anymore.
And honestly, I did that on purpose. I wanted you to feel appalled by Maria and feel like you don't even know her anymore, because that's how Tess and Michael feel, and that's how Maria feels about herself right now. She doesn't even know herself.

Nove:
I'm guessing there is order in this chaos to be had so.
Yes, there's usually a method to my madness. ;)

Krista:
It's funny that she says she wants to get rid of the baby and move on with her life. She's just gonna continue to crawl further down her little hole of despair.
Yeah, Maria doesn't seem to realize that, with the way she's going about this, she's not going to have a life left to move onto.
You should really donate your brain to science. I'm convinced that you are inherently evil and fanfiction is the only way you feel is safe to express such wickedness.
:lol: I am inherently evil. :twisted:

nibbles:
So, is this 'the worse' or just the beginning of 'the worse'? Are there still new, unfathomable depths of worse through which we must plunge before we get to 'the better'?
This is probably the worst part of "the worse." Or . . . well, there is one certain part coming up that could get even worse. And I think it will be in Part 70. But if you can make it through that, it will start to get better.

Karin:
What the **** have you done?
I think I've just managed to piss all my readers off. Except for maybe Leila, who loves the drama. ;)

Alison:
I can't even give you fb right now. Seriously. This is how much you've broke me.
I'll try to fix you, I promise.
I swear, she's going to turn me emo... she must be stopped. I am made of marshmallows and sunshine, I was not meant for this pain.
:lol: Marshmellows and sunshine?

Nat:
I'm not even following Maria's thought process here.
I know, it's confusing, and it was really confusing for me to write, because I wasn't even following her thought process. She's got this whole plan, and it doesn't really make sense to anyone else, but it makes sense to her; and she's so determined to go through with it that she can't see how wrong she is.

I thought you were going to check back in on this in a month. Not that I'm complaining. It actually might be done in a month. You guys are on page 1,164 of 1,317, so . . . I bet it will be done.

POM:
Love this story...your are such an amazing storyteller!!
Oh, thank you! I like to think I've gotten better over the years. Some of my earlier stories were not told all that well.

Neve:
It's bizarre that the more we see of Max and Liz, the more I like Max and the more I hate Liz. To me, she's ahead of him in the race to hell. (That that that's much of a race. Isabel crossed the finish line, did a lap of honour and had a shower long ago.)
:lol: Oh, goodness. Now, if Maria's not careful, she's going to join that race.

killjoy:
Speaking of Isabel....I bet she's in the shock of her life when Michael gets home.I'm sure she's thinking that Maria is out there telling Michael all about his baby and is expecting him to come home all happy and back together with Maria.What she won't guess is that Maria just pushed Isabel and Michael together.
Yeah, Maria just did Isabel a huge favor. And Isabel will take full advantage of that fact.

There is some Lamptrimmer stuff coming up that I think you'll enjoy.

Ginger: Thanks for reading!



I decided to go home this weekend, so the next update won't be until Sunday afternoon. As always, thank you for sticking with this. I know it's hard right now, but there is light at end of the tunnel. I promise.









Part 69









Isabel was nearly frantic by the time Michael got home that evening. She’d been pacing around the apartment for awhile now, trying to call him on his cell phone, but he hadn’t been answering. When he walked in the door, she was overcome with relief. “Good, you’re back,” she said. “I was worried when you left without a word. I like it better when you’re here.” She knew he had gone to see Maria, but she asked him anyway, just to see if he’d tell the truth. “Where’d you go?”

“Just had to . . . take care of something.” He sat down on the couch, raking his hands through his hair. He looked extremely stressed out. He and Maria had probably argued, which was a good thing. Although arguments could lead to great make-up sex, which wasn’t so good. At least not for her.

“I know you went to see Maria,” she said, sitting down beside him. “It’s okay. I’m not jealous. I just hope you continue to make our family a priority over her.” There, she thought, the good old guilt-trip. Worked every time. “What’s wrong?” she asked, sensing that he was keeping something beneath the surface.

It only took him a few seconds to get the words out of his mouth. “She says she pregnant.”

Isabel put her acting chops to use and pretended to be surprised. “What?”

“Yeah.”

“Really?” She’d known this for awhile now. She was just surprised that Maria had told him. She thought for sure she’d have an abortion without saying a word. Isabel laughed lightly. “She must secretly idolize me.”

Michael shot her a look.

“Sorry, not the time for jokes,” she apologized.

“You know, you don’t seem as surprised about this as I am.”

“Well . . . I had my suspicions,” she lied easily.

“Well, I didn’t. I feel like this is hitting me out of nowhere.”

“Well, that’s because it is,” Isabel pointed out. She really wished Maria hadn’t told him. This was just going to complicate things. “So is she keeping the baby or . . .” Everything would be fine if Maria didn’t keep the baby.

“I don’t know.” Michael slung his head and sighed. “I didn’t even get the chance to ask her. And you know what else she said?”

“What?”

“She said it’s not mine.”

What?” Isabel’s mind immediately retraced the conversation she and Maria had had about this. Maria had certainly acted like the baby was Michael’s, but . . .

“Yeah, I can’t even begin to understand this,” Michael said sadly.

“Right there with you.”

“I mean, how can it not be mine? It has to be mine, right? ‘Cause the only way it couldn’t be mine is if . . .” He trailed off.

“If she cheated on you,” she filled in.

“Yeah. But she wouldn’t do that,” he insisted. “She loves me.”

“I loved you when I cheated on you,” she pointed out, garnering an angry look. “Just putting things in perspective.”

“But she doesn’t look pregnant, so she can’t be that far along. And wouldn’t it be too early for her to have a paternity test?”

Isabel nodded. “Yeah, it would.” She was starting to form her own conclusions, but she didn’t feel the need to share them with Michael.

“So how can she know it’s not mine?”

“Maybe she’s been to a doctor and gotten a date of conception,” she theorized, though she doubted that were true.

“But if I’m not the father, who is?” He looked desperate to understand. “God, this just . . . this is just too much right now. It doesn’t fit in my brain.”

“Did she tell you anything else?” she asked.

“No, she just took off, and I was too messed up to follow,” he replied. “And I went by her place, but she either wasn’t there or she pretending she wasn’t there, and she’s not answering her phone, and I can’t make any sense of this, and--”

“Okay, Michael, just try to stay calm,” she cut in before he worked himself into some sort of hyperventilation. “Getting worked up isn’t gonna help anything.”

“I have to get worked up. I may or may not be a father . . . again.” He groaned and shook his head. “And how am I supposed to feel? Should I want the baby to be mine, or should I be relieved if it’s not?”

She shrugged. “Maybe both.”

“And just . . . how did my life get like this?” he wondered aloud. “My life. I’m a responsible, cautious guy.”

She lowered her head and mumbled, “I have a confession to make.”

He looked at her curiously.

“I knew Maria was pregnant,” she admitted.

“What? Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Because I thought you should hear it from her,” she explained. “I found out and . . . I guess I just kinda assumed it was yours, but . . . come to think of it, she never actually said it was.” She scooted closer to him and placed one hand atop his. “You know, Michael, if she says it’s not yours, I’m inclined to believe her. I just feel so bad for you. This is a lot to deal with.”

“And I don’t know how to deal.” He looked as though he were about to cry. She didn’t blame him, but someday he’d look back and see that Maria DeLuca wasn’t worth crying over. She wasn’t the one for him.

“Well, listen,” she said, “I just want you to know, I’m here for you no matter what. You’ll always have me, and you’ll always have our son. That’s all that really matters.”

He shook his head speechlessly and rose to his feet. “I need to clear my head,” he said, heading for the door. Something told Isabel that his head was going to be pretty cluttered for awhile.

Once he had headed back out, Isabel turned her attention towards the photo atop the television, the one of Michael and his all his friends. Except they weren’t exactly friends anymore. Michael and Kyle were still friends and Maria and Tess were probably still friends, too, but Kyle and Tess were estranged, and Michael and Maria . . . they weren’t even a threat.

Isabel stood up and walked over towards the TV to pick up the picture frame. Her eyes zoomed in on Maria, and she smiled. “Liar.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“So . . . run it by me again.”

Maria sighed and scraped her fingernails across Billy’s kitchen table. “Billy, we’ve been through this, like, a thousand times.”

“If I’m gonna commit to the role, I gotta have a good grasp on it,” he claimed. “Go through it again.”

“It doesn’t have to be an Oscar-winning performance. I just need you to pretend to be the father of this baby.”

He grinned and leaned backward in his chair, holding onto the table edge to keep himself upright. “I still can’t believe you’re knocked up.”

“Would you shut up?” She hated that Billy could talk about it so casually. It wasn’t a casual thing. “Now, if anyone asks, I ran into you the night Michael and I broke up. I was sad. We slept together, and now I’m pregnant with your child. Simple enough for a preschooler to remember.”

“Too bad that didn’t really happen,” he mused. “The rebound sex, I mean. I’m fine with not bein’ a dad. I don’t really have to be a dad, do I? I’m not gettin’ roped into some lifetime commitment?”

Maria sighed. “No, I’m having an abortion.”

“Okay, cool. Just wanted to make sure.”

She stared at him in disbelief. Okay, cool?

“So . . . what’re we hopin’ to accomplish?” he asked finally. “Is there a bigger picture I’m not seein’, or is this all just to piss Mike off?”

“It’s . . . it’s complicated.” She figured she’d have to explain it to him, though, if she wanted his help. “I didn’t even want him to know I was pregnant, but my so-called best friend forced me into it. Now, I don’t want him to know it’s his baby, because he’ll want me to keep it. I’d rather have him think I slept with you again than have him know I aborted his child.”

“So why come to me? Of all people.” He leered at her. “You still hot for me?”

She made a face of disgust. “Ugh, hardly.” Once you went Michael Guerin, you never went back. “It just so happens that you’re Michael’s second least-favorite guy on the planet, and you’re easy to convince.”

“Who’s the first?” he asked.

“The guy who raped me,” she answered. “I would’ve gone to him, but I can’t trust him. Besides, Michael never would’ve believed I willingly slept with him. He’ll probably believe I slept with you.”

“What makes you think you can trust me if you can’t trust the other guy?”

“The fact that you’re a dumb-ass.” She shrugged. Leopard couldn’t change its spots.

“Not nice, darlin’,” he drawled. “You know, I’m not sure I’m sold on the idea. What’s in it for me?”

She rolled her eyes and reached into her back pocket to pull out a wad of cash. It was only a hundred dollars, but to a guy like Billy, it probably looked like a treasure chest. His eyes widened momentarily, but then he looked her up and down and grinned suggestively. “Not exactly what I had in mind.”

“I’m not having sex with you,” she told him flat-out. She’d find someone else to play the role of baby daddy before she did that again. “Come on.” She shoved the cash at him and urged, “Feed your coke habit.”

He contemplated it only momentarily before seizing the money from her. He fanned the bills out, counted them, and nodded in approval. It was probably a combination of the money and the chance to piss Michael off that motivated him.

“That’s half,” she said. “You’ll get the other half after I have the abortion.”

He pocketed the money and stared at her. “What happened to you?”

She frowned, confused. What did he mean by that?

“When we met, you were on fire, full of life,” he said. “Well, I guess you’re still full of life, technically.” He motioned towards her stomach. “But you don’t even smile anymore. Kinda makes you seem like a bitch.”

“I don’t remember asking for your commentary,” she snapped. She was well aware that she’d been the best version of herself when she was with Michael and that she was the worst version of herself now. She wasn’t proud of it, and she didn’t need to be reminded of it by a guy who had a total of two active brain cells.

“I’m just sayin’ . . .” He trailed off and shrugged exaggeratedly. “Oh, well. Hey, so your friend really threw you out on your pregnant ass, huh?”

“More like she helped me load my bags in the car.” She didn’t want to make Tess out to be some monster.

“So I guess you need a place to crash.”

“I can sleep in my car,” she decided. It wouldn’t exactly be comfortable, but she could manage.

He laughed and said, “Where the hell were you when they were handin’ out maternal instincts?”

She shrugged. “Probably in the line for sex skills.”

“Ain’t that the truth,” he agreed. “Well, you can’t sleep in your car. That ain’t safe.”

She supposed it wasn’t.

“Stay here,” he offered. “House has a backdoor on it now. It’s cozy.”

It wasn’t cozy. It wasn’t cozy and it wasn’t warm and it wasn’t safe. It wasn’t apartment 521. But anything was better than sleeping her car. “Whatever,” she agreed. “Thanks.” She got up from the table and headed out to her car to bring her bags inside.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Right as Kyle was about to go to sleep that night, there was a knock on his door. Figuring it to be Michael, he got up and went to answer it, but much to his surprise, his ex was standing on the other side.

“Tess,” he said. “Hey.” He suddenly felt very self-conscious—he was only wearing his boxers and a beater. But when he saw the tears streaming down her face, his concern immediately shifted to her. “What . . . what’s wrong?” he asked. “Are you okay?” She didn’t answer him. “Tess?”

She sniffled and choked out his name. “Kyle?”

Oh god, he thought. What’s going on here?

“I really need a friend right now.”

A friend. He could be that. “Well, come in,” he said, ushering her inside. He kicked the door shut with his foot and noticed how weak she looked. He placed one hand on her back and held her left hand in his. “I got you,” he said, leading her towards the couch. She looked as though she were about to fall down any minute. And indeed, once they did get to the couch, she practically collapsed. He sat down beside her and asked, “You wanna tell me what’s goin’ on?”

She sniffed back more tears. “It’s bad, Kyle.”

His first thought was immediately, “Did Max do something?”

She shook her head. “No. For once, no. It’s Maria.”

“Maria?” If she and Tess were fighting . . . they’d get through it. They always did.

“Has Michael told you about any of this?” she asked, and upon his silent confusion concluded, “Apparently not.”

Kyle had no idea what she was talking about. Something was going on with Michael and Maria? And judging by Tess’s tears . . . something not good?

“Well, I guess there’s no harm in telling you, now that Michael knows,” she said. “You’ll either hear it from him or you’ll hear it from me.”

“Hear what, exactly?” he asked, somewhat afraid to be clued in.

Tess took a deep breath and announced, “Maria’s pregnant.”

Kyle’s eyebrows shot upward in surprise. “What? Oh, wow, that is . . . wow.” He wished he could say something witty or eloquent or . . . something that made sense, but ‘wow’ was just about the only word coming to mind.

“Yeah. That box you found for the pregnancy test . . . it was hers. I just told you it was mine so I could cover for her,” she explained. “It seemed like she didn’t want anyone to know. She hadn’t even told me yet.”

He thought back to the way he had reacted to that, the way he had accused her of lying to him. He’d even barged in with another test for her to take. He’d been such a jerk about it, and that whole issue had really tested what was left of their relationship. “So all the fights we had about that . . . there wasn’t even anything to fight about,” he said sadly.

She nodded. “Yep.”

“Oh, man.” He rubbed his forehead, trying to process all the new information as best he could. “You really threw yourself in the line of fire for her,” he remarked.

She shrugged as though it were nothing. “That’s what best friends do. You would’ve done the same thing for Michael. You know, if guys ever had to take pregnancy tests.”

“Yeah.” He liked to think he would. He was really impressed with Tess for doing that. “Oh, I feel so bad for Michael,” he said, returning his attention to the two people this was primarily going to affect. “As if he doesn’t have enough to deal with already. He’s already got one kid on the way. Now he’s gonna have another?” Michael’s life was changing all the time.

“Well . . . maybe,” Tess mumbled.

“Maybe?” Was there really a grey area when it came to fatherhood?

“Look, Kyle, this is all I’ve been thinking about for days and days,” she said. “Can we maybe . . .”

“Talk about something else?” he guessed.

“Anything else. You’ll hear about this from Michael, too, so . . .”

He nodded. “Yeah, sure.” He and Michael would discuss things in more detail. She clearly needed a breather. “Just . . . one more question: That secret you kept talkin’ about the other day . . . this is it, right?” He couldn’t imagine it being anything else.

“Yeah, this is it.”

“Okay.” He understood now why she hadn’t told him anything. “Man, I was way off. I thought it had something to do with Max and Liz.” He shook his head at his own lack of perceptivity. He should have known Tess would never be so torn up over a secret she was keeping to Liz. They weren’t even friends. Tess and Maria were practically attached at the hip.

He looked at his girlfriend . . . former . . . and she had a sort of lost, dazed look in her eyes. The tear tracks on her face were drying now, and she looked quietly contemplative.

“What’re you thinking?” he asked her.

“Oh, I was just remembering this day when Maria and I were little—ten years old—and she came over to play. It was raining outside, hard. Biggest rainstorm to hit Roswell in years.”

He smiled, picturing Maria and Tess as little girls. They must have been cute.

“We wanted to go outside, but it just kept raining and raining,” Tess went on, “so Maria’s mom called my dad, and they decided she could spend the night.” She smiled fondly. “So we built a fort in the living room. Out of pillows.”

“A pillow fort, huh?”

“Yeah. We built the walls out of couch cushions, and we draped a blanket over the top. And we filled it in with every single pillow we could find. We even took the pillows off my dad’s bed. It was a comfy fort.”

“Yeah, I’ll bet.” He didn’t know what exactly she was getting at, but he was content to just listen.

“And . . .” She sighed wistfully. “We just stayed in there all day, playing with our Barbies and our stuffed animals, and we slept in there all night. And I remember thinking, ‘This is my favorite place in the whole world. I don’t ever wanna leave here.’” Her smile began to fall. “But morning came, and the rain stopped, and Maria’s mom came to pick her up. My dad told me to take down the fort, so I did. And we never put it back up again.”

Kyle frowned at her tone. She sounded so sad.

“Sometimes I wish I could go back there,” she admitted, “because I never felt . . . safer and less afraid than I did in that pillow fort. I’d give anything to feel that way again.”

Something was really bothering her, and he wished he knew what it was. Whether it was the fact that her best friend was pregnant or something more . . . he didn’t need to know. She’d tell him if she wanted to. He’d be there for her even if she didn’t.

He placed one hand on her shoulder, hesitantly. This was really the first night he’d touched her since the night they’d danced in her living room. That hadn’t ended so well.

She gazed up at him with shiny, tear-filled eyes, and he was reminded of how beautiful she was. She was even more beautiful when she wasn’t sad, though. When she was happy, she was staggering.

He wrapped his arm around her shoulders, and she curled up against him, silently but noticeably grateful for the comfort. He wished he could do something more for her, but maybe this was enough. Maybe this was just what she needed. Maybe this was just what they both needed.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Michael lay out on his couch that evening, holding his phone in his hands. He kept trying to call Maria, but she wasn’t answering. He didn’t even know what he was going to say to her if she ever did pick up the phone. He had so many questions to ask and no idea how to ask them.

His life wasn’t supposed to be like this. He’d done everything right. He was a good guy, a good student, a hard worker . . . he’d never gotten into trouble, and he’d never done something to hurt anyone. Not intentionally, at least. So why was this happening to him? What had he done to deserve this mess of a life?

He flipped open his phone and dialed Maria’s number again. He waited for her to pick up, but there was still no answer.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria curled up on Billy’s couch, listening as her cell phone vibrated. It was the only noise in an otherwise silent house. It just kept vibrating, and she just kept listening to it. There was no way she was going to answer, but she imagined what would happen if she did. What would she even say? She didn’t know.

Billy was a stupid guy, but he was right to ask what had happened to her. She used to be a fun person to be around; she used to have a good time all the time. But everything had changed now. She had changed. And she had to confess . . . she hated the person she’d changed into.

She pressed a button on the side of her phone to turn it off. If he really wanted to, Michael could just leave her a voicemail. And she wouldn’t call him back.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tess woke up to the sound of her cell phone ringing. She groaned and ran one hand through her hair sleepily as she tried to open her eyes. She squinted at the morning brightness, and her heart sped up when she remembered where she’d fallen asleep: on Kyle’s couch, in his arms. He was still lying beside her, the sound of the cell phone causing him to stir as well. He opened his eyes and smiled at her, and she smiled back at him softly, loving that this almost felt like old times. Then she remembered everything that was going on with Michael and Maria, and that feeling of being trapped in the middle returned. Unfortunately.

“Um, can you reach my phone?” she asked Kyle. Her purse had somehow wound up underneath the coffee table, and he was closer to it than she was.

“Oh, sure.” He reached out with his left hand, but it was too far away. “Just a minute,” he said, reaching farther. He ended up reaching a bit too far and falling off the couch. “Ah!” he screamed, eliciting a light laugh from her. He finally got a hold of her purse, though, took her phone out of it, and handed it to her with a goofy grin on his face. “Here.”

“Thanks.” This was the Kyle she knew, the one who never ceased to do something dorky. She loved that boyishness about him.

When she looked down at the Caller ID, she saw that it was a different boy calling, someone who had definite reason to want to talk to her. “It’s Michael,” she said.

“Aren’t you gonna answer it?”

She considered it, but she didn’t want to be put in the position of being interrogated about Maria’s pregnancy. She knew things that Michael didn’t, and even though she wanted to tell him, she was reluctant to tell him anything when her own emotions were so up in the air. “He should be talking to Maria, not me,” she said, turning off the phone. She handed her phone back to Kyle, and he stuffed it back in her purse for her. Then he pushed himself up onto the coffee table and sat before her, still smiling supportively.

“Thanks for being my friend last night, Kyle,” she said quietly.

“I’m your friend today, too,” he assured her. He laid out his hands, and she set her hands down in his.

“Oh, you don’t know how good it feels to hear that.”

Before either of them could say more, the door to the apartment swung open, and Michael tumbled inside. “Kyle, you home?” He caught sight of the two of them in the living room and said, “Oh. Hey. Sorry, I didn’t mean to . . . Tess, I just tried calling you.”

“You did?” She pretended not to know that. “My phone’s been all screwy.”

He shut the door and said, “So I assume you know what’s going on.”

She nodded. “Yeah. I filled Kyle in on some of it.”

Some of it?” Kyle echoed.

“Where is she?” Michael asked her. “Is she at your place?”

“Not anymore.” Tess shifted uncomfortably. “She kinda moved out.”

“What?” Michael shrieked hysterically. “Well, where’d she go? I know you know.”

“I don’t know,” she answered truthfully. All Maria had said was that she’d be able to take care of herself, but Tess had her doubts about that.

“So she’s just gone?” Michael flapped his hands against his sides angrily. “Great. This is just great.”

“We’ve kinda been fighting and . . . she didn’t wanna stay with me anymore.”

“Probably didn’t wanna be found,” Kyle added.

“Well, I need to talk to her,” Michael said as he paced back and forth. “Where would she be?”

Tess shrugged helplessly. “I really don’t know.”

“Well, figure it out. If anyone would know, it’d be you.”

“Or you,” Tess pointed out. He was just as close to Maria as she was. Or at least he had been.

“Maybe she’s staying with Liz,” Kyle suggested.

Tess shook her head. “No, Liz isn’t her favorite person right now.”

“Maybe she went home?”

Tess shook her head again. “Doubtful. Her mom doesn’t even know about this.”

“So she’s just wandering around out there somewhere? She could get hurt,” Michael said dramatically.

“We’ll find her, I promise,” Tess reassured him.

“Yeah, Tess and I can go out and look for her today,” Kyle said. “You should get some sleep.”

Michael grunted, still pacing. “No, I can’t sleep right now.”

“Michael, with everything you have going on right now, you need to rest,” Tess agreed. “That’s the only way you’re gonna be able to handle this.”

All of a sudden, Isabel walked into Kyle’s apartment, uninvited as ever. “I think he’s handling it fine,” she said proudly. “Raise your hand if you knew Maria was a slut.” Her right hand shot up in the air and she squealed, “I did!”

Tess rose to her feet and glared at the pregnant girl. “Careful, Isabel. You’re talking about your own kind there.”

Isabel glared right back at her and said, “Tess? Can we step outside for a minute?”

Tess sighed heavily, not liking the sound of this, but she followed Isabel out into the hallway nonetheless, leaving the boys inside to talk. “What?” she asked impatiently. Whatever Isabel had to say was probably just a waste of time.

Isabel shut the door and lowered her voice when she said, “I know Maria’s lying. That baby’s so Michael’s.”

My god, Tess thought, trying not to show a reaction. How does she just know this stuff?

“I don’t expect you to confirm anything. That’d be pretty stupid, even for you,” Isabel went on. “Just know that I’m not gonna say anything. Michael already has a family. With me. I’m really not looking to share. So I guess if he’s ever gonna hear the truth, he’s gonna have to hear it from you; because Maria and I appear to be keeping our mouths shut.”

“Isabel Evans keeping her mouth shut?” Tess taunted. “But where will all the cocks go?” She smirked.

“Funny,” was Isabel’s response. “But you know what’s funnier? The lose-lose situation you’re in. You either don’t tell him and carry around the guilt from that for the rest of your life, or you do tell him and lose your best friend. Hmm.” The very distinct glint of enjoyment shown in her eyes. “Choices.”

Tess swallowed hard. Isabel Evans was a world-class bitch . . . but she wasn’t wrong.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Michael sat on the couch, taking Tess’s spot as he told Kyle exactly what Maria had said to him.

“Oh, man,” Kyle said, shaking his head. “Tess didn’t tell me that part.”

Michael wished there wasn’t a ‘that part’ to tell.

“No. No way. No, I can’t believe she’d cheat on you.”

Michael shrugged. “Isabel did.” Maybe he had a type, and maybe Maria and Isabel were more alike than he’d ever imagined.

“No, no, I still don’t believe it,” Kyle said. “Maria’s not Isabel.”

“That’s what I thought.”

“Oh, but hey, here’s a thought: Maybe she didn’t cheat on you,” Kyle theorized. “We don’t know how far along she is. She could’ve been pregnant for a long time.”

“Trust me, she’s not that far along,” Michael told him. In addition to not looking pregnant, Maria had also given him the privilege of buying her tampons when she’d had her period in both January and February.

“Well, then, maybe she just got pregnant,” Kyle put forth. “You know, recently.”

“Maybe,” Michael agreed. He didn’t know what to believe. “Man, I need to talk to her. I’ve got so many questions.”

“Yeah,” Kyle agreed. “What answers are you hopin’ for?”

“I don’t know,” he admitted, scratching his eyebrow. He’d worked through the situation a million times in his head. Either the baby was his and he became a father of two who had to work out a way to have a relationship with two women who didn’t particularly like each other; or the baby wasn’t his and he settled into a mediocre life with Isabel. And no Maria whatsoever. Either way, it wasn’t what he’d wanted. “I don’t know anything anymore, Kyle,” he said. “I feel so messed up.”

“Hey, you’re gonna be alright,” Kyle told him. “I promise.”

Michael sighed heavily. He wished he could believe that.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria wrote down Wednesday, March 18, 3:30 on a hot pink Post-It note and underlined it twice, then circled it. Then, just for kicks, traced her pen over the letters again, pressing so hard she thought she might be making an engraving in the kitchen table. Wednesday, March 18, 3:30.

“Ah, nothin’ like a little masturbation in the morning,” Billy proclaimed as he came downstairs shirtless, stretching his arms over his head. “I wish it’d been your mouth instead of my hand.”

Maria ignored that and asked, “What happened to the girl you were seeing while you were seeing me?”

“Val?” He pulled open the refrigerator, took out a carton of milk, sniffed it, and put it back. “She got pregnant. Not by me.”

“So a girl gets pregnant and she gets undesirable? Is that what you’re saying?”

“Pretty much.” He took out a can of beer, then reached up into one of the highest cabinets to grab a box of cereal. He emptied out the box into a bowl that didn’t appear to have been washed in years, then poured in beer along with it as a substitute for milk. Maria made a face. She’d drunk a lot of beer over the years, but it didn’t even taste good. Especially not for breakfast.

“You know, I’d still do you,” Billy said, chewing with his mouth full.

“Don’t talk to me like that.” Michael never talked to her like that. He never objectified her or made her feel uncomfortable or . . . did anything mean to her.

“Somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed,” Billy remarked, carrying his cereal bowl over to the table. He sat down beside her and continued to slurp away at his concoction.

“What bed? You made me sleep on the couch,” she pointed out.

“I offered to let you sleep in the bed.”

“Yeah, with you.” That wasn’t going to happen ever again.

“All I’m sayin’ is, if a guy’s pretending to be all paternal, you should shag him as a way of sayin’ thank you.”

Oh my god, she thought. He’s such scum.

“Not that cash ain’t nice,” he went on. “It’s just . . . cunt’s better.”

She hated that word, especially when someone like him said it. “Would you shut up? My day’s pretty much sucked already, and you’re making it worse.”

“Why’s your day sucked?” he asked, already halfway through his bowl of cereal now.

“Well, I experienced my worst morning sickness yet, and then I called and scheduled my abortion.” That was what Wednesday, March 18, 3:30 was all about. “Oh, and I found out it’s gonna cost me about five-hundred dollars, so it’s bye-bye bank account from here on out.”

“Why does everyone act like abortion’s a bad thing?” Billy wondered. “If it helps you live your life the way you want, I don’t see a problem with it.”

“It’s just not that simple,” she said, wishing it was. Part of her problem was that she didn’t even know how she wanted to live her life anymore.

“Are you gonna have sex again after all this?” he asked suddenly.

“What?”

“Relax, I didn’t ask if you’d have sex with me; I asked if you’d have sex. Period.”

“What-what does that have to do with any of this?” she sputtered.

He grunted. “That’s what this is. Sex got you into this mess. When you get yourself out of it, are you gonna chance it again or be one of those freaks who reclaims her virginity?” He laughed.

“That’s really the last thing on my mind right now.”

“Just don’t make your man wear two condoms. Takes all the fun out of it.”

“How did I ever date you?” she wondered aloud, holding her head in her hands. “You’re, like, the most annoying guy ever.”

“Wanna get high?” he asked.

She made a face at the offer. “No.”

“Drunk?”

“Hello, I’m pregnant!” She knew Billy was an idiot, but this was just ridiculous.

“So? You’re not goin’ through with it. What’s it matter?”

She shook her head as he brought his bowl up to his mouth and drank all the beer still pooled in it. “I don’t wanna drink,” she said decidedly. As long as the baby was in her body, she wasn’t drinking anything. But after it was gone, she was definitely going to be ready for a round of drown-my-sorrows.

“Suit yourself,” he said, pushing the chair back. He got up and dropped his now empty bowl into the kitchen sink. “Hey, I got a gig tonight out at some club,” he said. “You should come.”

“I don’t feel like it.”

“Come on,” he urged. “We want people to believe we made a baby, right? So we should make some appearances together.”

As much as she didn’t feel like going out, he had a point.

“Come on,” he repeated. “You know it’s not a bad idea.”

Unfortunately, it wasn’t. She was club-bound.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Michael tossed and turned that evening. He’d been lying in bed uselessly all day while Kyle and Tess were out and about searching for Maria. As much as he wanted to be able to fall asleep, he couldn’t. There was just way too much on his mind. He figured he’d pass out from exhaustion at some point, but for now . . . he wasn’t at that point yet.

He looked over to the right, and his mind started to play tricks on him. He remembered what it felt like to watch Maria sleeping there, and for a moment, he let himself believe she that she was really there, curled up beside him, breathing contentedly, hogging all the blankets. But he blinked, and the image was gone. He was alone there, and the bed smelled like Isabel.

He tossed the covers aside and swung his legs over the side of the bed. He pulled open his nightstand drawer and took out a thin slip of white paper. On it was his very first artwork of Maria, a drawing. He remembered sketching her while she slept, feeling the amazement course through him, thinking how beautiful she was. She’d been lying right there, right in his bed, and it hadn’t even been that long ago.

He clutched the drawing tightly in his hand. He’d held onto all his Maria artwork for awhile now, determined not to throw everything away like he had after Isabel had left him. But maybe now, in light of all these new revelations, it was time to start getting rid of things.

With the drawing in hand, he stormed into the kitchen. He pulled out his trash can from underneath the sink and held the drawing above it, ready to drop it in any minute now. He crumpled it up just slightly in his hands, not enough to ruin it, and then he straightened it out again. He stared at the image on the paper, the only girl he’d ever truly loved, and his already broken heart shattered even more. The tears started to come up . . .

“Michael?”

He shoved them back down when Isabel came out of the bathroom.

“What’re you doing up?” she asked as she approached him. “I thought you were sleeping.”

He swallowed hard. “I couldn’t.”

She glanced down at the drawing in his hand and asked, “What is that?” Slowly, she reached down and took it from him, looking it over for a only a moment before handing it back to him. “You know what I think you should do with this?” she said. “Get rid of it. Get rid of all your artwork of her. You don’t need her anymore. You’re too good for her.”

He laughed at the irony of everything she’d just said. “Oh, I’m too good for her, but I’m not too good for you?”

“She doesn’t matter.”

She’d always matter to him, regardless of whether or not he was the father of her child. “Of course she matters. She might be having my baby.”

“She’s not,” Isabel said. “I am. Michael, you need to accept the facts and move on.”

“No, you know what I need to do?” He slapped the drawing down on the counter. “Get drunk.” He pushed past her, slipped on his shoes, grabbed his jacket, and headed out the door. He wasn’t usually the type to get wasted when things got bad, but desperate times called for desperate measures.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Isabel stood alone in the kitchen. Michael was developing a pattern here, walking out on her, leaving her all by herself in their apartment whenever Maria drama occurred. What if she went into labor while he was gone? He should have stayed with her.

Isabel picked the drawing up off the counter and glared at the girl it captured. Maria looked pretty in the drawing, and innocent. Two things she no longer was.

Isabel purposefully dropped the drawing into the trash can and smiled. “Oops.”








TBC . . .

-April
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LOVE IS MICHAEL AND MARIA.
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Part 70

Post by April »

There's really no excuse for why this update is so late today. It's just laziness. :lol:

Thank you:

Sara
Karin
nibbles
Nove
Ginger
Leila
killjoy (If you like Passion Maria better than 521 Maria, I don't know if I'll be able to do anything to redeem her to you.)
Trixie
Neve
Eva
Krista
behrlyliz


And yes, today's update is probably the worst of the worse. But if you can get through this update, I promise a gradual glimpse of light at the end of the tunnel.

Music Rec: "Inflatable" by Bush when you see :cry: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLXpddAdnOo I love this song. Beautiful, angsty lyrics, and it seems appropriate for the fic right now.









Part 70








Tess had never realized how big Santa Fe was until she and Kyle spent the entire day driving around it. It was nighttime now, and even though she was feeling tired, there were still a lot of places they hadn’t checked. She wasn’t going to feel right until she knew where Maria was.

“You really think she’d hang out downtown?” Kyle asked. “Seems to me she’d rather lay low.”

“I don’t know where else to look,” Tess admitted as Kyle drove along a busy street. Santa Fe had a definite nightlife, and Maria had been known to be a part of it in the past. “We should check out some of her usual haunts.”

“And she’s still not answering her phone?” Kyle asked.

“No.” Tess had called and left her about a billion voicemails begging her to call her back. “I hope she’s okay. I’ll never forgive myself if she’s not.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong,” Kyle assured her, turning left onto another main drag.

“I let her leave,” Tess said guiltily. “I should’ve tried harder to convince her to stay.” Maria was stubborn, but she could’ve been equally as stubborn if she’d really tried. “I shouldn’t have made her leave in the first place. Maria’s not good at being on her own.”

“What’d you guys fight about anyway?” he asked. “The pregnancy?”

“Yeah.” Tess gazed out the window at all the people walking down the sidewalks, walking into movie theaters, walking out of restaurants. None of them were Maria. “I wanted her to tell Michael, but . . . she didn’t wanna do that.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. But she told him, obviously, eventually.” If she’d known that Maria was going to tell him that huge lie, though, she would have told Michael first when she’d had the chance, avoid the whole mess altogether.

“Should we park somewhere?” he asked.

“Sure, make-out point’s not far away,” she managed to joke.

He chuckled. “I mean, should we park and get out and check some of these clubs,” he clarified.

“Yeah, probably.” She smiled a little, thankful that she wasn’t doing this alone. Having Kyle there with her made it easier. “Hey, Kyle?” she said. “Do you realize we’ve spent more time together during the past twenty-four hours than we have during the past month of our lives?”

“Yeah, I thought about that.”

She regretted spending so much time away from him, but she supposed it was a good thing they were spending this time together now, despite the circumstances. “I missed you,” she told him.

He smiled at her. “I missed you, too.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria and Billy walked into the Cowboy Club that night merely minutes before his scheduled performance time. He’d been trying to be fashionably late, but Maria tried to explain that only A-list celebrities could afford to be fashionably late. And Billy would never be A-list anything.

“Oh, yeah,” he said as he looked around. “I’m gonna light this place up tonight.”

“Do you know this used to be a gay club?” Maria said.

“What?”

“Yeah. Michael and I sang karaoke here once.”

“Huh.” Billy shrugged. “I always knew Mike was a queer.”

There was a word Maria despised more than almost any other words. “My brother’s gay, you know,” she told him because she knew he didn’t know. He didn’t know anything about her.

“Oh, that sucks.”

She stared at him in disbelief. “That sucks?” How could one person be so insensitive. She hoped he’d never been that insensitive.

“Alright, I gotta go backstage,” he said, hoisting up his guitar case.

“To set up?”

“Or spark up.” He grinned and said, “Cheer for me,” as he disappeared into the crowd.

She shook her head. Wasn’t gonna happen. Billy was a really . . . disgusting guy.

She walked through the crowded club, trying to find a place to sit (preferably a dark corner where she could avoid being hit on by guys who didn’t know she had a bun in the oven). Something told her to glance over at the bar, though, and when she did, her breath caught momentarily. Michael was sitting there by himself, drinking. His back was to her, but she could tell it was him.

“Michael,” she whispered, her heart fluttering just slightly. She had to remind herself that they were ruined, though, and it would be best if he didn’t even know she was there. She would have just left the club had she been the one to drive there, but Billy had driven, and she wasn’t crazy enough to walk all the way home by herself.

Please don’t notice me, she thought, standing behind some tall guys. Hopefully he’d leave soon before Billy took the stage.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Michael had switched to shots immediately after his first beer. Beer just wasn’t going to get the job done. He needed something harder, and it’d been awhile since he’d drunk vodka. So he asked for vodka.

“Give me another,” he told the bartender, giving him his empty shot glass. He wasn’t sure how many shots he had done by now, but he was feeling it.

The bartender poured him another shot and slid it back to him. Michael downed it, grimacing at the taste, and slid it back to him again. “Another.”

Again, the bartender poured it full. He drank it down and kept on. “Another.”

The bartender hesitated as he was about to pour it this time. He poured only a few drops in, then stopped. “Sorry, guy,” he said, “I gotta cut you off.”

“What?”

“You got a ride home?”

“Uh, I have an empty shot glass that needs re-filling. So go ahead.” Michael wasn’t usually so demanding, but he needed this right now.

“You used to come in here with a girl and a gay guy,” the bartender remarked. “What happened to them?”

Michael shrugged. “Gone. The gay guy left town and the girl . . .” He gripped his empty shot glass tightly. “The girl’s just gone.” He pictured the look on Maria’s face when she’d met him in the coffee shop yesterday, and . . . that wasn’t Maria. Not his Maria, anyway. He gave the bartender a pleading look and asked, “Can you just pour me another shot please?” He was drunk already, but he wanted to get drunker.

The bartender shook his head, not giving in, and Michael moaned in distress. He felt a hand on his shoulder, and when he looked up, he saw Kyle standing beside him.

“Hey, buddy,” Kyle said. “Whatcha doin’?”

“Gettin’ smashed,” Michael replied. He was going to have to start doing this more often, because it was making him feel . . . a little better.

“Yeah, I can tell,” Kyle said. “Did you know Maria’s here?”

“What?” Michael looked around wildly. When had she gotten there? How come he hadn’t seen her?

“Yeah. Tess is over there talkin’ to her right now.” Kyle pointed the two girls out, and for a moment, Michael’s eyes locked with Maria’s, but she looked away just as quickly.

Michael started to his feet, but Kyle moved in front of him and stopped him, pressing on his shoulders to urge him to sit back down. “Whoa, I don’t think so,” he said. “You look like you can barely stand, let alone have a paternity talk. Come on, I’ll take you home.”

“No, no, I’m fine here.” Michael sat back down on his bar stool and picked up his shot glass again. “Another?” he begged the bartender.

The bartender once again shook his head silently.

Michael groaned. “Man, you . . . you suck, you know that? Yeah, I said it. You suck. Go home, Kyle. This guy sucks.”

“Dude, I’m not leaving without you.”

“I can drive myself home,” Michael assured him, even though he wasn’t sure if he was supposed to drive on the right or the left side of the road. It was the right side . . . right? “Oh my god,” he groaned, holding his head. “I’ve never felt so stupid.”

“Come on, let’s go.” Kyle grabbed his arm and tried to lift him up.

“No, I wanna stay here,” Michael insisted, resisting. He wasn’t even sure if he could put one foot in front of the other.

“Michael . . .” Before Kyle could finish his sentence, an announcer walked up on the stage and grabbed the microphone. The DJ cut the music, and the spotlight shown on the stage. “Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to our live music night,” the announcer said. “We’ve got some great singers coming your way. And we also have . . . Billy Darden.”

Michael reacted immediately. “What the--”

Kyle clasped one hand over his mouth to keep him from finishing his outburst.

“Give him a warm round of applause, folks.”

It was a practically a golf-clap as Billy came out onto the stage, his guitar slung over his shoulders. “Hey there, everybody,” he said in that stupid accent. “This one goes out to my baby mama Maria.”

“What?” both Tess and Kyle shrieked.

“Oh, just kill me now.” Michael seized vodka from the bartender and poured himself a shot, filling the glass to capacity. He tossed it back as Billy began to sing.

Mariaaaaaaa!” he hollered as he strummed along on his guitar. “I like the way you fuck me! Mariaaaaaa! I like the way you--”

“Get off the stage, jackass!” Michael shouted at the top of his lungs.

Billy stopped playing. “Hey, who was that?”

A second spotlight roamed the crowd before settling on Michael. He raised his empty shot glass and said, “Cheers.”

Billy laughed and exclaimed, “Mike! Last time I saw you, you were punchin’ me in the face. How you been?”

How had he been? Since then, he’d been the happiest he’d ever been in his life and the most miserable. He’d been a regular twenty-one year old guy, and he’d been a twenty-one year old father-to-be. And now he was drunk.

“Kyle, I wanna go,” he said, trying to stand up. “I wanna go home.”

“Okay, we’re goin’.” Kyle got underneath one of his arms and said, “Tess?” motioning her over.

She left Maria’s side and came over to get underneath his other arm. Together, they practically carried him through the crowd towards the exit.

“Hey, where you goin’?” Billy taunted. “Can’t stand up to a real man?”

As they walked by Maria, Michael felt something in him resist. “Wait, wait, wait,” he said, “I gotta . . .” He got away from Kyle and Tess and stumbled towards the girl he used to love . . . and probably still did. “Maria,” he said, swaying from side to side.

She wouldn’t even look at him.

“Him? You slept with him?” Just thinking about it made him feel sick. “That’s his kid? How . . .?”

Maria finally lifted her eyes to look at him. She looked as though she were about to cry.

“How could you do that to me?” he asked in a rush, his voice choked with emotion. He almost fell over to his left, but Kyle was there to prop him up. “How could you cheat on me?” he said. “I loved you.”

“Michael, let’s just go,” Tess said, gently tugging on his arm.

“No, I wanna know.”

“She didn’t cheat on you, man,” Billy said, hopping down off the stage. “She came to me the night you guys broke up. Isn’t that right, Maria?”

She wrapped her arms around herself and looked down at her feet again. “Right.”

“Oh my god, Maria,” Michael heard Tess say.

“The night we broke up?” Michael echoed. “The exact same night?” By now, the crowd had started to form a circle around their small group. Billy walked into the center of it, poised as though he were expecting a showdown.

“You broke her heart, Mike,” he said, infuriating Michael even more by calling him that. “She needed a shoulder to cry on. Or . . . a dick to ride on.”

“Shut the hell up, you sick son of a bitch,” Michael slurred, staggering towards him.

Billy shrugged. “What can I say? She’s just one of those girls. Once a whore, always a--”

Michael curled his hand into a fist and swung it at Billy’s face before he could finish that sentence.

“Michael!” Maria shrieked.

Billy tumbled backwards, then lunged at him, but the bouncer was there in an instant to get between them. A couple of onlookers held Billy back, and Kyle grabbed Michael told hold him back.

“Break it up, guys. Break it up,” the bouncer said.

“We are leaving,” Kyle decided, trying to haul him out, but Michael wanted to stay and hit Billy again. “Michael . . .” Kyle growled. “You don’t wanna do this here. Come on.”

Michael gave in and allowed Kyle to drag him out of the club. Tess once again reclaimed her spot under his right arm, and the two of them managed to get him out into the parking lot heading towards where their car was parked.

“No,” he groaned. “I can’t believe she’d . . . with Billy? I fuckin’ hate that guy.”

“Michael, give me your keys. I’ll drive your car home,” Tess said.

“I wish it was mine,” he mumbled in a rush of drunken honesty. “The baby. I wish it was.”

Kyle reached into the front pocket of Michael's jeans and pulled out his keys. “Whoa, felt somethin’ I never wanted to feel there,” he said as he tossed the keys to Tess.

“Did you hear me?” Michael asked him, barely able to pick up his feet as they got closer to the car. “I wish it was mine.”

“Yeah,” Kyle said, supporting most of his weight now. “We heard you.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tess pulled the covers up over Michael that night, and Kyle stood back and watched, barely able to fathom the fact that the guy he was seeing was his best friend. He and Tess had managed to get him home to his apartment and into his bed, and he’d fallen asleep the moment his head hit the pillow. Which was probably a good thing.

Tess came to stand beside him in the doorway and said, “This is just so sad. I mean, Michael’s usually such a calm, put-together guy, always able to take care of himself. But look at him now. He couldn’t even stand up or drive home or get himself into bed. He’s like a kid.”

“A kid who’s having a kid,” Kyle said, slipping out of the bedroom. “He’s got a lot goin’ on. Poor guy.”

Tess followed him out, looking almost as exhausted as Michael was. Almost.

“So, Maria and Billy, together again. Can you believe it?” he asked.

She shook her head. “No, I can’t.”

They walked out into the living room, and Isabel was waiting for them.

“Is he gonna be okay?” she asked.

“He’ll be hung-over, mad, sad, pretty much everything in between,” Tess replied.

“I’ll be here for him,” Isabel said.

Tess grunted. “That’s the last thing he needs.”

Kyle put a hand on her shoulder, hoping to calm her down a bit. Tess and Isabel didn’t get along, and that was fine, but now really wasn’t the time for them to be at each other’s throats.

“So, this Billy guy . . . is he a loser?” Isabel asked, seeming to back off a little.

But Tess didn’t let up. “Yeah, he’s moronic, untalented, and deceitful. You know, like you.”

Isabel stepped right up in her face. “Oh, you’re lucky I’m pregnant, bitch, ‘cause if I wasn’t, I’d--”

“What? Talk me to death?” Tess taunted.

“Ladies, ladies,” Kyle interjected, stepping in between him much like the bouncer in the club who’d gotten in between Michael and Billy. “Stop. Or oil up and continue. Whichever.”

Isabel rolled her eyes in annoyance. “You two can leave now,” she said. “I’ll make sure Michael’s taken care of.”

“Let’s go,” Kyle said to Tess. “There’s nothing else we can do here.” He put his arm around her and led her out of the apartment and over to his. She hadn’t been home all day, but unless he drove her . . . she still wasn’t going home.

“I’m sorry,” she apologized as he pushed open the door to his apartment. “Isabel just makes me so mad.”

“Yeah, she makes everybody mad,” he agreed.

“You know, you’re really the Core Four’s backbone tonight,” she said. “I mean, if there was still a . . . Core Four.” All of a sudden, she went limp against him, collapsing.

“Whoa,” he said as he barely caught her. “Tess? Tess?” She’d fainted.

A minute or so later, Tess came to. He’d moved her to the bed and was pressing a cold washcloth to her head.

“What happened?” she choked out.

“You fainted,” he said, brushing her hair away from her face. “I caught you.”

She smiled tiredly. “You always catch me.”

He always tried.

Her eyes fell closed again, and her voice dropped to a mere whisper when she faintly whispered, “I love you, Kyle.”

He froze momentarily as he watched her fall asleep. She loved him. She’d never told him that before, but after everything they’d been through, after everything they’d put each other through . . . he knew for a fact it was true. And he still loved her, too.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“Oh my god, this is horrible,” Maria said dramatically as she and Billy walked in the house that night. “Everything about this night was a disaster.” She threw her purse down on the couch and shook her head. Why had she let Billy convince her to tag along tonight in the first place? She should have just stayed home.

“I don’t know, I think my set went pretty well,” he said, holding an ice pack against the right side of his jaw.

“What set? You didn’t have a set,” she pointed out. “You had two lines of a stupid song and a bar fight in which you called me a slut. Thanks for that, by the way.”

“I speak the truth, baby. And I wrote that song for you.”

“Yeah? Well, it sucks.”

“You suck . . . or at least you used to.” He grinned and dropped one hand down to cup his package.

“Do you not get it?” she shrieked, throwing her hands exasperatedly in the air. “Your innuendo’s not turning me on!”

“That’s ‘cause your hormones are outta whack.”

“It’s ‘cause I don’t like you,” she growled. “Thank God you’re not really this baby’s father. I’d feel like killing myself.”

“That’s sweet,” he said as though he hadn’t even heard her. “Now tell me the truth.” He removed the ice pack from his jaw and turned the bruised side of his face towards her. “Is this gonna swell?”

“It’s already swelling, you dumb-ass.”

“Dammit.” He pressed the pack to his jaw again and flopped down on the couch. “I can’t believe I got hit by that guy again.”

Maria couldn’t believe anything about the night. Of course Michael had been at the Cowboy club the exact same night she and Billy went there. It was an awful coincidence.

“You know what’s funny?” He chuckled lightly. “I always knew he loved you. I knew before you did. I’m smart like that.”

She pressed her hand to her forehead and shook her head. “This wasn’t how I wanted him to find out about us. I mean, there is no us, but . . . you know what I mean!”

“How did you want him to find out?”

“I don’t know, like in private, like somewhere quiet, just me and him. Not in a club full of people while he was drunk off his ass.”

“Yeah, he doesn’t seem like much a drinker,” Billy remarked.

“He’s not. I mean, he can drink—it’s not like he’s Kyle Valenti or anything—but he usually doesn’t get wasted like that.”

“He does now,” Billy said, “thanks to you.”

“And you,” she added.

“Hell no, I’m just along for the ride, baby. This whole thing was your bright idea.”

Dammit, she thought. Billy was an idiot, but he was right about that.

“Wanna screw around?” he asked out of nowhere.

She made a face of disgust. “In your dreams.”

“Alright, in my dreams.” He got up off the couch and headed upstairs. “Mariaaaaaaa!” he sang as he went. “I like the way you fuck me!”

Maria collapsed on the couch and fought the urge to pull her hair out. She was in so deep now.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Michael awoke with a pounding headache. He tried to stay asleep, but the headache was insistent, and eventually he opened his eyes. His blinds were pulled so it was dark in his room, but it seemed bright somehow to him. And his arms and legs felt like they weighed a thousand pounds.

He rubbed his forehead and his tired eyes as vague memories of the night came back to him. He remembered going to the Cowboy Club, and he remembered sitting down at the bar and drinking a lot. And he remembered Billy . . . and Maria. And hitting Billy. From there on out, it got hazy. Tess and Kyle must have been the ones to get him home.

He sat up slowly, looking around. The other side of the bed didn’t appear to have been slept in, so Isabel must have slept on the couch that night. He hoped she was out and about doing something, anything, because he really didn’t want to deal with her.

“Oh, god,” he groaned, rubbing his forehead some more. This hangover was excruciating already, and he could tell it was about to get worse. He felt his stomach churning. He got out of bed and hustled to the bathroom as fast as he could.

As he knelt before the toilet, throwing up more than he’d thought was humanly possible, he felt ashamed and ridiculous and more miserable than he’d ever felt in his entire life. He wished he hadn’t gotten so hammered. He should have stayed in and had a couple of beers instead of going so overboard.

Isabel came to stand in the bathroom doorway, and he wished she’d just leave him alone. He didn’t want an audience for this.

“Hmm,” she said. “Now you know what it’s like to be me in the morning.”

He pressed the toilet handle down and flushed the contents, then sat back against the shower, feeling every ounce of strength and energy evaporate from his body. “My parents would be so proud,” he said, thankful they couldn’t see him now. They wouldn’t even know him.

She came into the bathroom and held out her hand. He reluctantly took it and let her help him to his feet. He felt better now that he’d gotten most of the alcohol out of his system, but he still felt like crap.

“Look, Michael, I’m really sorry you have to go through this,” she said. “I can only imagine how hard it is.”

“Do you know what Billy’s like?” he asked. “No, you don’t, ‘cause you’ve never met him. Consider yourself lucky. He’s a loser. And he’s dumb and he can’t sing and I hate him.”

“That’s probably partly why Maria slept with him,” Isabel pointed out. “She was mad at you.”

“They were gonna move in together once,” he said, “but they didn’t, ‘cause he cheated on her and she found out. Ironic, huh? How come everybody cheats? I never cheated.”

“Michael, come here.” She took his hand and led him out of the bathroom across the hallway to the closet he had converted into the baby’s nursery. She pushed open the door and turned on the light inside. “I know you’re upset,” she said, “and you have every reason to be. But you’re gonna be a dad in a matter of days now, and your son needs you. He needs you to be . . . you, Michael. A good guy. A responsible guy, a loving guy. Not puke-in-the-toilet guy.”

He stared at the empty baby crib, the one that had taken him so long to assemble. She was right. It wouldn’t be long now, and there would be a baby in that crib. His baby. Maybe Maria wasn’t having his baby, but Isabel was.

“Can you pull yourself together?” she asked. “If not for you, then for him?”

What choice did he have? He wasn’t going to be a reject father. He could be so much better than that. So much better.

He nodded, silently reassuring her.

“Good,” she said. “I’m glad to hear it.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

When the doorbell rang that afternoon, Maria wasn’t sure what to do. Billy had left that morning to go run some errands, he said, and that left her home alone. Billy was a shady guy who probably had some shady friends, and she felt nervous about letting any of them inside. But when she peeked out the peephole and saw Michael standing there, she relaxed. And then she tensed up again. She supposed she could pretend she wasn’t there. But now was about as good a time as any to talk to him. They were alone, and the house was quiet, and he didn’t appear to be drunk this time. So she opened the door.

“Michael,” she said quietly. He looked . . . horrible. He had on a baseball cap and sunglasses, and his entire stance seemed defeated. The stubble on his face clearly indicated he hadn’t shaved for awhile, and his mouth seemed permanently etched into a frown.

“Is Billy around?” he asked.

“No, he said he had things to do today,” she replied.

“Things to do?” he echoed. “Like girls who just broke up with their boyfriends?”

She sighed. This was not going to be a civil conversation. She could tell. “Michael, I’m sorry.”

“Can I come in?” he asked. He strode inside without waiting for an answer, and she shook her head sadly as she closed the door. They were both nothing like they used to be.

“Oh, look, this place has a backdoor now,” he remarked as he sauntered into the middle of the living room. “You know, you should’ve told Billy to use your backdoor instead of your . . .” He trailed off.

“Funny.”

“It isn’t meant to be.” He reached up and pressed one hand to his head, muttering, “Oh, crap.”

“What?”

“Nothin’, I’m just really hung-over right now.”

He looked it. In two and a half years of knowing him, Maria had never seen Michael look like this.

“You wanna know something?” he said. “I’ve never felt more messed up in my entire life.”

That was one thing they had in common. “How do you think I feel?” she asked him.

“Guilty, hopefully,” he grumbled. He took off his hat and held it by his side. His hair was flattened out and looked slept-on. “That’s really his baby?” he asked. “You’re tellin’ me the truth?”

No. “Yes.”

He stood motionless, still seemingly reluctant to accept that.

“Why would I lie?” she added. Maybe so I can have an abortion and you can’t talk me out of it.

“Everybody lies,” he mumbled barely audibly. “Mostly everybody lies to me. First Isabel, now you . . .” He shook his head sorrowfully. “I don’t get it. What did I do wrong?”

Nothing, she thought. He hadn’t done anything wrong, not really. He’d handled every crisis thrown at him to the best of his ability. She was the one who’d aggravated an already huge mess. “Michael, everything just started to change,” she said, “so fast. One minute we were having this great Valentine’s Day, and then all of a sudden Isabel was back and pregnant and . . . our whole lives got turned upside down.” February 14, 2009 was probably forever going to be the worst day of her life.

“So that’s an excuse to go to Billy?”

“I didn’t need an excuse,” she said, committing herself to the lie despite how heartbreaking it was. “We were broken up.”

“Yeah, for all of what, two hours?”

He was getting mad. She could tell, and that made her nervous. When Michael got mad, he got really mad, and everything he kept bottled up inside started to come out. “I was . . . I was hurting,” she stammered, “and he was just . . . he was just there and--”

“Where? Inside of you?” he cut in angrily.

She huffed, feeling like such a slut even though she hadn’t actually been a slut with Billy. “Michael, I’m not . . . this isn’t something I’m, like, proud of, okay? It was a mistake.”

“Well, you’re gonna have to live with that mistake for the rest of your life,” he pointed out. “You’re gonna have to change that mistake’s diapers and shout over that mistake’s music and send that mistake to college . . .”

She wasn’t going to do any of those things. “So encouraging,” she said sarcastically. “Then you know what? I won’t look forward to any play-dates with your mistake.”

He tore off his sunglasses and glared at her with bloodshot eyes. “My son is not a mistake,” he ground out.

“Isn’t he?” She was being too harsh, but she couldn’t stop. “Because I’ve heard all about the night he was conceived.” The fury and the jealousy she always felt at the thought of him and Isabel started to boil up and boil over, and the words came tumbling out. “Break-up sex? Seriously, Michael? You had to be such a guy that you couldn’t keep it in your pants that night of all nights?”

“I was confused,” he said.

“So was I when I slept with Billy! Why is it such a double-standard?”

“It’s not a double-standard,” he denied. “Isabel and I made a baby before I ever fell in love with you.”

( :cry: )

“But what’s worse, screwing the bitch who cheated on you and revealed she’s gonna leave town to be with the other man, or spending the night with a guy you used to date because it’s the only solace you can find?”

“Solace?” He made a face and rubbed his forehead again. “Oh god, my head hurts.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t have had so much to drink,” she suggested.

“Maybe you should’ve stuck by me when I need you!” he roared suddenly, throwing his hat and sunglasses down on the floor. “If you hadn’t left me when Isabel came back, none of this would be happening. If you hadn’t been so selfish . . .”

“Don’t you dare blame this all on me,” she interrupted adamantly. “I may have been the one to leave, but you let me leave. In fact, you made me leave. Kicked me out of your apartment, remember?” She could still hear him saying those words in her mind, ‘This isn’t your home anymore.’

“Should’ve never let you move in with me in the first place,” he mumbled, dragging one hand through his matted hair.

“This, all of this . . .” She held out her arms. “This isn’t something I did. This is something we did.”

“Yeah, but that’s something you did with Billy,” he growled, pointing at her stomach. “And I’ll never forgive you for that.”

Never? Her heart ached at the thought, but she reminded herself that she had anticipated this. She had anticipated never. “Fine, then I’ll never forgive you for choosing Isabel over me.”

“I never . . .” He shook his head forcefully. “I never chose her over you, Maria. Never. Even after we broke up, I still thought we’d end up together. Somehow. In fact, when you asked me to meet you in the coffee shop, I thought we were takin’ our first step in the right direction.”

She shrugged, finding it so hard to pretend she didn’t care how much he was hurting. “Well, then, you’re naïve.”

“Well, then, you’re a bitch!” he shouted.

“I can’t believe you thought we’d get a happy ending when you know you’re having a son with Isabel Evans of all people.” But she had to admit, knowing that he’d been hoping made her wish she’d hoped a little harder.

“It would’ve been weird,” he admitted, “but we could’ve made it work. It wouldn’t have been the end of the world. This, standing here right now, knowing you’re carrying that bastard’s child . . .” He swallowed hard, looking as though he were on the verge of tears. “This feels like the end of the world. And I’ve never felt worse.”

She’d never felt worse, either. She felt like she was dying, and even though she should have known how to save herself, she’d fallen so far down by now that she wasn’t sure she could climb back out. She hung her head and mumbled, “You should be relieved it’s not yours.” And that was about the only thing she’d said to him since he walked in that she truly believed. Michael wasn’t ready to have two kids with two different women.

“Are you kidding?” he said. “I prayed it was mine. Not at first, but I started to. Because I’d do everything I could to be there for you and be a good dad. Billy’s not gonna do that. He’s not gonna be there for you or this baby.”

She sniffed back tears and said, “It doesn’t really matter.” She was still having an abortion. Her baby wasn’t going to have a father because it wasn’t even going to have a life.

He frowned as he studied her, apparently trying to understand what she meant by that. She averted his eyes at all costs. She could lie about it all she wanted to, but she knew. She knew she was housing a part of him.

“I really do hope it works out for you, Maria,” he said as he bent down to pick up his sunglasses and his baseball cap again. “Honestly. But we’re done.”

Her bottom lip trembled. He sounded like he really meant it this time.

“I’m not gonna hold out hope anymore. I can’t keep gettin’ my heart broken by you.”

I’m so sorry, Michael.

“As far as I’m concerned, you cheated on me. We may not have been together anymore, but where my head was at, and where my heart was at, there was no way I could’ve slept with anyone else. No way.” He shook his head sadly, looking absolutely ruined. “So from now on,” he finished, “I’m just gonna devote my entire life to my son, because he’s the only thing I have left. And if that means I’m with Isabel, then I’m with Isabel. I don’t care.”

He didn’t care? How had she done this to him? She hadn’t meant to.

He put his sunglasses and his hat back on and trudged towards the door. He walked out without another word, and the devastation settled in. As ruined as he was . . . Maria felt that ruined, too. She sank down onto the floor dazedly and placed one hand atop her stomach. She wished it was her baby’s fault, but it wasn’t. It was hers.

What have I done?

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Michael rode the elevator up to the fifth floor of the apartment complex. It seemed as though it were going really slowly. Fed up, he pushed the emergency stop button—it was practically at a stand-still anyway. He turned to face the right side wall and pressed his fists against it, breathing deeply, trying to keep himself calm. But he wasn’t calm. He was a train wreck.

He slammed his right fists against the wall three times, hoping it would make him feel better, but it didn’t. It just made his hand hurt.

“Dammit,” he swore, reaching out to press the emergency stop button again. The elevator resumed its upward movement, and eventually the doors opened on the fifth floor. Michael got out and practically staggered down the hallway to his apartment. He pushed open the door, slammed it shut behind him, and slumped against it in defeat.

“Michael?” Isabel asked as she came out of the bedroom. She gazed at him curiously. “Are you okay?”

He was so far from okay. He was so far from okay, he didn’t even remember what it felt like to feel that way. He stared back at her, and he allowed his impulses to take over. He just . . . didn’t care anymore. Maria had clearly given up on him. It was finally time to give up on her.

He made his way towards Isabel wordlessly and cupped her face in his hands, bringing his mouth down to crash into hers. He kissed her hard, too hard, and he hoped she’d have enough sense to push him away, but she kissed him back without hesitating. It felt wrong and it didn’t feel good, and he wanted to stop; but his hands found their way to her shoulders so he could pull her up against him. Her enlarged stomach kept him at a distance, but she seemed determined to close that distance as she threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck, moaning.

He pressed his forehead against hers and reached in between them to grip his shirt in his hands. He ripped it where buttons were supposed to be unbuttoned and shrugged it to the ground. She smiled excitedly and trailed her hands down his chest to unfasten his jeans. He watched her fingers work, expecting this to feel the way it used to. This was the girl he’d lost his virginity, too, and back then, it had always felt good. It didn’t feel good anymore.

She shoved his pants down. He frantically gripped her hips and backed her down the hallway towards the bedroom, struggling to walk with his pants around his ankles. What was he thinking? She was eight and a half months pregnant, and he didn’t even have these kinds of feelings for her anymore.

She sat down on the side of the bed and pulled him downward to kiss her again. He slowly moved to sit down beside her, not sure how they were going to find a comfortable position for her. They lay down on the bed, side by side, and he propped himself up so that he could bend down and kiss her. He had just begun to scrunch her shirt up in his hands when something inside him snapped to and made him stop.

Maria.

He looked up into the empty doorway, and even though he knew it was empty, he imagined Maria standing there, watching what was happening with sad, tear-filled eyes.

“What?” Isabel asked him, stroking the side of his face. “What is it?”

He kept staring at the doorway. His imaginary image of Maria started to fade, but the emotion she brought with her didn’t.

“Michael.” Isabel sounded impatient, expectant.

He slowly glanced back down at Isabel, and he couldn’t believe he’d sunk this low, low enough to use her like this. This wasn’t him, and this wasn’t something he wanted.

“I’m sorry,” he apologized, getting up. He pulled his pants up and fastened them as he walked out of the room. When he’d gone to see Maria today, he’d told her he could have never slept with anyone else right after they’d broken up considering where his heart and his head were at. And even now, that still held true.









TBC . . .

-April
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LOVE IS MICHAEL AND MARIA.
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