Pull Me Out From Inside (Liz, Teen) 1/1 [10-16-05] AN IMP!

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Hopeless Romantic
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Pull Me Out From Inside (Liz, Teen) 1/1 [10-16-05] AN IMP!

Postby Hopeless Romantic » Thu Oct 13, 2005 11:11 pm

Pull Me Out From Inside
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Summary: What if Max wasn't the only one who got visions from the timeline that Liz changed? What would she do with the knowledge she was never meant to have?
Rating: Teen
Disclaimer: I own nothing pertaining to Roswell. Title comes from the song Colorblind by The Counting Crows.
Author's Note: I think I got Lost on my way to the AU boards... It's kinda scary over here, now I know why I stayed away ;). Well...this is my first venture into CC land. Hopefully it doesn't suck. Also, I know that this idea has been done, but this is sort of my take on it...Read to find out what the hell I'm talking about. It's only one part!

*ducks back into my little AU coccoon*

ENJOY!

<center>Pull Me Out From Inside</center>

I’m not even sure when they started. Blurred images, vague feelings that I could only just recognize. They felt so familiar, but at the same time they seemed so distant that it felt like they belonged to someone else entirely.

It was the night in Las Vegas that I realized they did.

Well, they belonged to Liz Parker, but it wasn’t the same person that I was. This Liz Parker was loved, happy, complete...the love of her life wasn’t seconds away from blasting off the planet with his former alien bride who he had not only slept with but managed to get pregnant.

It was when Max told me that he had a flash of us hopping out of a cab, like we’d just been married in Vegas, that I realized what was happening to us.

Our hearts, unable to truly let go of each other, were somehow accessing the memories of a life we never lived, a life where we never had to leave each other, where we were cemented. A life I would’ve given anything to live.

Anything but the entire world...anything but the lives of the people I loved.

Nights later, after I finally knew what they were, I had been laying in my bed when it happened again. Only this time, it was different. This time the images weren’t blurred, the feelings weren’t vague. And I knew exactly what it had felt like to make love to Max. I knew what it felt like to be whole.

For one agonizing, heartbreaking moment, I was in his arms, surrounded by his love, and I couldn’t breathe under the weight of it. Because when the moment was over and the memory gone, the person I was now, the broken shell of a girl who had given up and lost everything, left me feeling nothing but emptiness.

And lying on my best friend’s bed, waiting for Max to leave my life forever, waiting for the moment when I would truly be broken, I was hit with a memory that would change everything. I didn’t even know it then, because that was before everything fell into place, Maria’s mom, the tapping, Kyle’s memory...

When we found out it was Tess, that Tess had killed Alex, and we were on our way to the Pod Chamber to stop them before they left with her, speeding down that highway I couldn’t help but wonder.

What had I really done when I changed the future that night in October?

Alex was dead. Not only had an alien killed him, but it was Tess. Max, Isabel, and Michael were about to blast off the Earth with a murderer. My shoulders sagged and my head dropped. Nothing had changed...in fact, I had just made everything worse.

This time, Tess had hurt the group, and she was about to take the Granilith right back to the people who wanted it, the people we were supposed to keep it away from. The four square would be incomplete, the Granilith would be gone, and this time...this time we didn’t have Alex.

I had changed the future, changed our lives and somehow made things worse, a consequence we could’ve never predicted. But it was up to me to change it.

And there was only one way to make it right.

<center>***</center>

“Tess killed Alex!”

It had been a relief to say it, but at the same moment a curse. In a way it was sealing my fate. Bringing the truth to light, making her intentions known, left me with only one choice.

He wanted us out of the Pod Chamber, he wanted us to leave. But I knew something he didn’t. I knew that there was only one way to fix everything. I had one more sacrifice to make.

The memory in my mind, I stepped to the Granilith. Kneeling beside it and looking up to Max.

“Liz! You need to get out of here, now!”

He was frantic, worried as time ticked by, but I was determined.

“Max, I need your help.” He came up to me, looking like he was about to carry me out of the pod chamber to make sure I was safe, but I wasn’t going anywhere. Well, I was...but I couldn’t tell him that just yet, because he would never let me go.

He knelt beside me, and we stared at each other for a second, him trying to figure out what I was doing, me wanting to just take him in, my last memory of him.

“I need you to trust me, Max.”

We were hardly aware that Tess was watching us, or that Michael had remained at the entrance of the Granilith, stopping her from leaving. Not that it mattered, she would never hurt anyone again if I could help it.

And when Max nodded, and began listening to my directions, changing things, modifying as quickly as he could, I just watched him. This was really happening, I was really going back.

When he was done, I stood, and now it was his turn to watch me. Brow furrowed in confusion as I reached my hand out placing against the cool, humming surface of the Granilith.

We were all that existed in that moment. Our eyes locked, and I lifted up, placing my lips against his own for the final time.

I’m not sure if he truly understood what I was doing, I’m not even sure if he agreed with it. But I knew now that he did trust me. He trusted me enough to let me go, to let me do what I needed to so I could save them all.

I shut my eyes as I felt the pull, my body feeling like it was in a million places at once, before coming back together. Opening my eyes, feeling a tear slide down my cheek, I found myself in a different place, and he was the only thing I could see.

As Tess shouted in angry protest, as Maria walked back in, shocked at the turn of events, Michael holding both of them back, my eyes remained only with him.

And in my last moment, I placed my hand against the glass, watching as he reached up, his palm meeting mine, tears in our eyes, as the world around me disappeared in a shining white light.

<center>***</center>

It was amazing how different the streets of Roswell were almost two years before, even while they remained the same.

I guess it was just proof of how much I had changed. How different things became...Back then, I was just a normal teenage girl. I walked these streets in ignorance, only to have my eyes opened to the array of possibilities and realities that truly did exist.

Face hidden by my curtain of hair, I peered discreetly into the bustling café I had come to know and love as I had grown up. The Liz Parker inside was innocent, her parents’ little girl, and minutes away from losing it all.

I had been given a second chance at life, had my world turned upside down by Max Evans from the moment he placed his hand on my dying flesh. This Liz Parker was incomplete, but she would never know what she was missing.

I had once chance to make things right, to save Alex, to truly save the world.

I didn’t view myself as some martyr, sacrificing everything for the greater good. Maybe at one time I had seen my actions that way, but this time way different. This time, all I was doing was correcting a mistake. Because I was never supposed to live.

Alex was. He was supposed to grow up, to fall in love, get married, have kids. That had never been meant for me and I knew that now.

It was a hard pill to swallow, but it was one I was willing to accept if it meant he would live, if it meant that Max would never go through the things he did for saving me. It was a sacrifice he had been willing to make, one that I had no choice in back then, but now things were different.

I knew better, I knew what it would lead to, and I had a choice this time. It was one I was prepared to make.

But the one thing I wasn’t truly prepared for was seeing him again at 17. I remembered Future Max’s words to me, and I couldn’t help but agree. That nervousness that hid just beneath the surface of my emotions whenever he was around...seeing him crossing the street, coming to meet Michael who was already saving their booth, brought it all back.

I did the only thing I could. I took a deep breath and walked up to him, taking his hand in mine and pulling him into the alley beside the restaurant.

“Liz, wh-what are you doing?” The confusion etched on his features, our close proximity, everything just making my heart race.

He was staring at me, waiting for an answer but all I could do was stare back. It was finally hitting me, what I was about to do, about to give up, what I was taking away from all of them, from us.

Another shuddering breath, and it all came spilling out.

“I know this might not make sense, Max...but I know who you are.” Realizing he still had no idea what I was talking about I pressed on. “I know what you are.”

Once he had processed this, I continued. We didn’t have much time. I could already here the men shouting inside the restaurant.

“I just want you to know,” I began as I felt my tears finally come, “that I love you. And you might not understand, and you might think I’m absolutely crazy right now, but I need you to know...you are the reason I’m alive. Who you are, everything about you...”

My breath caught in my throat as I heard Maria scream my name from inside. Max was still staring at me in confusion, but his head shot to the right at the sound.

“Liz, what’s going on?”

The sound of a gunshot resounded around us, screams of panic, the sound of the Crashdown door opening as the men ran away.

I doubled over in a pain I knew I had felt before. It was happening. I had been shot. Chin trembling from the effort, I reached out, grabbing Max’s arm as he moved to see what the commotion was, and pulling him to me.

“Liz!”

He pulled me against him, searching my face to find out what was wrong but there was only one thing I could focus on. I was secure in his arms, complete for the last time, and I did the only thing left to do. I placed my lips against his, and prayed that he would respond.

It took less than a second for him to kiss me back, and I felt my knees weaken. I could barely distinguish if it was from the pain I was feeling, because in one quick move he had his arm looped around my wasit, pulling me against him and holding me up.

We melted into each other, my arms wrapping around his neck as we found each other, became one, and once again came home.

Images flew through my mind, all the things he needed to know, things that would protect him and keep him safe. But beyond all that was the one thing I wanted him to know more than anything. How much I loved him, how much I hated the decisions I had to make, and how much I regretted that he would never know what it had felt like...

I could feel the life slowly draining from me, and knew that as I stood here, as I kissed him, inside I was dying. It was amazing how true that was in every single way.

Our kiss ended seconds before it happened. With his forehead resting against my own, he stared at me, the tears in his eyes showing me he understood what I was doing.

“There has to be another way...” he pleaded with me, but I just shook my head, biting my lip with the effort it took. “Liz, no.”

He started to pull away but I knew it was too late. I was leaving, dying...I closed my eyes as his hand slipped from my fingers, sinking to my knees, as the pain of my past self’s reality crippled me.

This is what I had come here for, this is what I had come to do. It was the only way to make things right. There would be no suspicion from Valenti, no orbs, no Pierce, no white room...The Skins would never find them, never hunt for the Granilith, and even if there was a Tess and Nasedo, this Max knew the truth about them now...

They would be safe. Everything would be the way it had been meant to be.

With that last reassuring though, I smiled. And just as quickly as this had all begun...

It was gone.

<center>The End</center>
Last edited by Hopeless Romantic on Sun Oct 16, 2005 6:00 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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"The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of will..." - Vince Lombardi

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