AlysLuv
Eve
Carolyn
deamon
thank so much for the feedback!
chapter four
All day Sunday, the day after seeing Max with the kids from the burn unit, the day after he mysteriously jumped out of her car refusing to let her see where he lived, Liz couldn’t stop thinking of him.
With a ton of homework piled on her desk she found herself lying on her bed staring out the window as the rain continued to fall, with music streaming through her ear buds.
She had dug through the back of her closet searching for her Westfield Jr High’s yearbook, along with all her other grades, going back to class pictures taken from Kindergarten through fifth.
There he was in every picture looking down, or off to the side somewhere, as if feeling unworthy, or ashamed to have his photo taken.
While other kids were caught in awkward positions of laughing or talking, Max seemed removed from everyone, separate the rest, the isolation was heart wrenching, something that Liz never really noticed until now.
While it was obvious that he wasn’t popular, she always thought it had to do with his shyness, or the rumors of what happened to him in those foster homes, but now she wasn’t sure.
She wondered more and more about the hospital, about his constant breathing problems that suddenly seemed way more serious than just the asthma she had assumed.
Liz couldn’t wait to go to school when Monday came, she decided that, uncomfortable or not, she was going to talk to him and find out what was going on.
She had it in her mind that she just felt bad for him, going through all these years without a friend, other than crazy Michael Guerin, had to be difficult, and that’s what she wanted, a friendship, to get to know him better.
Only when she got to school to find that he was absent, she was surprised by the strong twinge of sadness and disappointment she felt.
Max lingered with her throughout the day, the memories of him over the years, that she was surprised she remembered, that haunting beautiful poem that she found herself reciting over and over in her mind all the time, the sight of him playing with those kids, making them so happy, and especially those eyes, those damn stunning sad eyes.
Hardly being able to sleep that night she walked in her homeroom to find out that yet again Max was absent.
The rest of the week was the same, he was a no show, by Thursday she decided to talk to a teacher they both shared, thinking that she might know something.
"Hey, Mrs.LaCava, have you heard anything about Max Evans, he's been out all week, i was just wondering - "
When approaching their English Lit teacher, Liz tried to be casual, but to her surprise she was shut down immediately.
“Liz, I really have to get going, I’m sorry”
Growing more concerned by her teacher's horrible acting job, Liz chased her down the hall.
“Wait! Mrs. LaCava, please, I’m really concerned about him, he’s been out all week, I know he has some kind of health issue, can you please just tell me if he’s alright?”
Sighing heavily her teacher stopped briskly walking to her car to turn towards Liz.
“Liz, you’re a great kid, but I can’t discuss another student’s personal issues with anyone, even someone as trustworthy and sweet as you. My advice? Talk to him , he’s so much more than anyone knows.”
With that Mrs. LaCava took off in her SUV, leaving Liz standing in the parking lot, softly whispering to herself.
“Yeah, I know he is.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Walking in the hospital, Thursday night, ready for her normal scheduled volunteer shift, Liz checked in for her assigned floor.
Giving her a warm smile Hazel handed her the clipboard as usual to sign in.
“So tonight you’ll be on the Orthopedic floor, unfortunately no one under sixty five is up there, lot’s of hip replacements this week.”
Leaning on the counter, yawing from her lack of sleep, Liz shook her head.
“Actually, I feel more comfortable with the older generation Hazel, you know that, I told you, kids my age? Vicious, man eating, dead eyed sharks!”
Hazel laughed hard as she sighed her name to Liz’s worksheet.
“Oh Liz I’m sure that’s not so for all young people, you’re not a shark, I bet there’s a sweet dolphin out there in that vast ocean of life just waiting for you.”
Raising her eyebrows. Liz rolled her eyes waving as he got on the elevator.
“I highly doubt it Hazel!”
Pressing the ninth floor Liz leaned up against railing as a group of doctors walked into the elevator on the fifth floor.
“He’s certainly a mystery, honestly he should’ve been gone a long time ago, sometimes I think its sheer will keeping that kid alive.”
Liz’s ears perked up, but she knew there was no way they could be talking about him, only her heart was telling her something different.
“Such a shame, he’s the nicest kid I’ve ever treated, even as a child, no visitors, no parents, still he was always more worried about the child in the next bed, always making sure he was being taken care of.”
The third doctor nodded in agreement, “Yeah, that Max is a special case, worst part, because of his situation, he’ll never get to the top of that transplant list, and without it we all know his will or anything else won't be strong enough to keep him alive.”
Liz grabbed onto the rail behind her, feeling faint she immediately lowered her head as she felt the sting of tears in her eyes.
In the distance she could hear voices, but she was too upset to pay attention, this just couldn’t be, it had to be another kid, a different Max.
“Excuse me, but is this your floor?”
Once again she heard someone talking, it was then that she realized they were talking to her.
Looking up at the number nine lit up over the doors she shook her head, it was her floor, her assigned floor, the Orthopedic floor, but she had to know.
“No, s-sorry I didn’t hear you, that’s not my floor.”
It was a struggle to find her voice, still reeling from the shock of what she had overheard.
Hoping the group of doctors would lead her to another kid, as horrible as that sounded, she stayed on elevator as it rose up another five floors.
Getting off the fourteenth floor, the intensive care unit, Liz could hardly breathe.
The last time she was there was when her Grandma Helen had a heart attack, it was the last time she talked to her, the last time she saw her before she died.
Shoving her hands in the deep pockets of her pink scrubs, she walked down the hallway with her head down and her ears open hoping to hear something to point her in the right direction, so she could find out that it wasn’t him and get the hell out of there.
Unfortunately when she turned the corner, after going down a very long hallway with many room with glass walls so the nurses could see in quickly at anytime, Liz saw him.
Laying in bed, propped up with pillows, Max was staring out the window, just like in class, just like always.
He looked the same, no visible injuries, no massive machines hooked up to him, no tubes come from every which way.
She didn’t understand, she still had no idea what was wrong with him, what she did know is that they don’t put you in intensive care for nothing.
Liz was trapped, part of her wanted to turn and run back on the elevator, back to Hazel and pretend none of this happened, but the other half, the stronger, louder, more insistent half was demanding her to be brave, to go talk to him.
Covering the photo ID around her neck with her hand, she worried, she knew she wasn’t authorized to be on this floor, and could not only get throw out, but kicked out the volunteer program, which would not be good.
Sighing, she nervously tapped her foot on the ground, watching closely for any activity from the staff.
Looking up at the big clock over the nurses station, she realized that it was time for a shift change, that meant confusion, people coming and going, not knowing who was there and why.
Waiting till the nurses desk was basically empty, except for one nurse that seemed way overloaded with work, Liz took a deep breath and pushed open the glass door.
Looking down at her clean white sneakers, Liz felt immediately as if she were intruding, this was so incredibly personal, and she was just walking in, breaking the rules, it was wrong in every sense of the word, completely unprofessional, totally unethical…
“Hey.”
Liz’s guilty train of thought was abruptly shoved off it’s tracks when she hear a soft, gentle voice coming from across the room.
Looking up slowly, she started to walk towards him immediately tripping over a cart with jello and juice that had been left untouched.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry.”
Nervous Liz started wiping up the spilled juice, thoroughly embarrassed.
Shocked beyond belief, Max tried to straighten out his hospital gown, while running his fingers through his long hair, knowing how horrible he must look.
“Please just leave it, it’s fine, I didn’t want it anyway.”
Shoving his notebook under the blanket, he raised the head of his hospital bed up higher while keeping an eye out for the nurses that were coming in every fifteen minutes to check his vitals and meds.
“Liz, what are you doing here, how did you know - “
Twisting the inside of her pockets around her fists, Liz shrugged, knowing what she did was wrong.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to intentionally invade your privacy.”
Pointing backwards, towards the big silver doors, she bit down hard on her bottom lip, something Max always noticed she did when she was unsure of herself, something Liz was totally unaware of.
“I was on the elevator, it’s Thursday, and well, you know that’s when I volunteer here. I … well I was on my way to the Orthopedic floor when some doctors got in, they started talking about this kid they were treating, at first I didn’t think anything, but then they said your name, not your last name, your first, they had no idea I knew you… well that’s pretty obvious, it’s not like they would, I just didn’t want you to feel like you couldn’t trust your doctors, see it’s just that you weren’t in school all week, and I was worried, and when I tried to talk to Mrs. LaCava about you, she made me worry even more… not that she told me anything, because she didn’t, it’s just I guess how she told me nothing that got me thinking … omg what the hell is wrong with me, someone please stop me from talking, Max smack me or something… “
Giving her a warm smile he nodded towards a chair beside his bed.
“Why don’t you sit for a minute, catch your breath… we have about thirteen minutes before nurse Amy is due to come in.”
Nodding Liz smiled back, suddenly feeling a lot more at ease, he was even sweeter when he talked, and his voice, well that gave her an entirely different feeling.
“So, I guess it would be too personal to ask why you’re here.”
Looking down, Max took a labored breath, searching for the right words.
“Please don’t be offended … but… I’d rather not.”
Shaking her head, Liz felt horrible.
“No offense taken, absolutely Max, I totally understand, god, I shouldn’t even be here.”
Flashing the most mesmerizing golden stare her way, he rasped softly, touching her heart in a way she’d never felt before.
“I’m glad you’re here Liz.”
