k next chapter, sorry for the delay...
hybrid holds hand out to be slapped.
Chapter 21
“Michael you can leave now if you want, I’ll lock up.” I called out to Michael who was cleaning the kitchen as I swept the front of the Crashdown. The dinner rush was long over and thank God for that. This entire day had been hectic, from screaming kids to endless phone calls for food supplies and explaining to Maria my previous sleepover at Max’s. I was ready to just mellow out in the now quiet atmosphere of the café.
“Are you sure?” Michael bellowed from the order window, “Because I can stay if you want.”
“No, it’s okay.” I continued to sweep casually as he came out the staff door.
“Well I don’t need to be told twice.” He strode through the café ripping off his apron “Maybe I’ll catch the replays of the game.”
“Have fun.” I looked up as he made his way to the front in a kinda jog, he looked so eager to get the hell of here and I couldn’t blame him.
“Michael wait!” I called out just as he was halfway between the doors “I just wanted to say thanks.”
“It’s okay Liz, besides I needed the money.” He said with a shrug
“No, no…I mean thanks for being there for me.” I stuttered out awkwardly
“Anytime.” Michael grinned then continued jogging across the street and into the night.
Now it was time to just chill and think. I had been so busy trying to keep my parent's business from going under and waiting on so many people I didn’t even get to think about what I would say to Max.
The other night when we were together I had been so taken aback by the many things he said and done. Judging from his appearance his father must have hounded him after my Dad was through with hounding him and Mr. Evans. Obviously my Dad had made his life a living hell by telling his father I was pregnant. Something a big time lawyer wouldn’t want put on his reputation that his very own son would be so irresponsible, probably costing Phillip Evans some business.
Max just seemed so out of it, and I’m not even sure if what he told me and did was even him. Maybe everything was the alcohol talking. What if he doesn’t remember what happened, what if he does and takes it all back? What then?
This was so not good; I shouldn’t have kissed him or let him kiss me. He might get the wrong idea and think that we're back together. It was just so hard to stand there and let him break down before me without doing something. Everything is just hopeless, I’m a fool for ever thinking things would turn out better, and everything is just getting worse every time we see each other.
What if our relationship is beyond repair?
I gulped at the thought and realized I had just been standing in the same spot, sweeping the same area over and over.
“I think it's clean.” I gasped with alarm when I spun around to see Max standing timidly at the front of the Crashdown, I didn’t even hear the jingle of the customer bell ring I was so lost in thought.
“Oh Hi, Max.” I spoke slowly while gripping the broomstick so tight my knuckles whitened from the pressure.
“Sorry, am I disturbing you?” He asked in genuine concern while starting to back away.
“No, no!” I all but screamed at him, “…I-I was just, ah thinking.” I said shaking my head as if to get my head around to what I should say to him. I awkwardly shifted my feet as a silence yawned between us. I was quick to break it. “Umm, so why are you here?” I asked while placing the broom up against the counter and turning back to see Max ducking his head.
“Uh, I came to thank you for taking me home the other night. I was lucky to have you pass by.”
“Yeah, no problem.” I averted my eyes still shifting my weight as the awkward silence fell over use again.
“I’m sorry.” We both said simultaneously, then softly chuckled to ourselves.
“Why are you sorry?” Max asked somewhat confused.
“I don’t know, I guess I kinda gave you the wrong impression that night. I’m just sorry if it’s made anything worse.” I confessed ducking my head this time and finding it hard to look at him.
“You shouldn’t be the one to apologize, I was the one who made the move and I’m sorry. I’m especially sorry that you had to put up with me for the night, I had big fight with my father as you probably knew and I was…..thinking about how I screwed you over, you could say I was in kinda a bad place.”
“I could tell.” I said as I looked up to him, his eyes were pools of sincerity and dark with pain. I almost didn’t recognize his demeanor as he shrugged his hands into his pockets.
“I’m so sorry. I wish you didn’t see me like that.” he said regretfully.
“Max, I’ve seen you drunk before.” I assured him, but hid the fact that he had scared me that night.
“Not like that.” He brought his knowing gaze to mine and an unspoken agreement that he was somewhat out of control that night transmitted between us without words.
“Do you wanna sit down?” I gestured over to the booths and Max and I sat opposite each other. I felt like my heart was gonna jump out my throat and I had no idea why. Maybe because I always get hurt whenever I’m around Max, I grimly thought to myself.
“So what happened to make your father do that?” I asked as I pointed to the still raw cut above his eyebrow and slightly bruised cheekbone.
“Ah, well your father and my father duked it out and then after your dad left my father was infuriated and kinda accidentally lashed out.” He said while tenderly touching the raw skin.
“Looks like he ‘accidentally lashed out’ more than once.” I said pointedly as Max averted his gaze from my deliberate glance. He fell silent for a few moments shaking his head while I could see him replay the night over in his head.
“I deserved it.” He uttered under his breath still looking away from me.
“Max, that’s not true.” I spoke sternly but tenderly, but Max didn’t look convinced and quickly changed the subject.
“So what’s been happing with your parents?” He asked while I sat there, a little alarmed by his belief that he did deserve such a thing. I snapped out of my concern when I realized he asked me a question.
“That’s a loaded question.” I stated folding my arms on top of the table, finding it odd that we hadn’t screamed at each other yet. Well the night was still young; at least we were talking.
“I’ve got time.”
“My father locks himself in his study and I have no idea what the hell he does. If he’s not in there he's out, as my mother would put it. It’s just weird you know, his behavior has done a complete 180 and as for my Mom she’s not any better. Normally she’s such a busy-body but now she just mopes around the house or isn’t even around.”
Max nodded attentively as I vented my confusion to him and I felt a weight lift from my shoulders as I told him, I had always come to him if my parents were bugging me and vice versa, and we didn’t get that lately, so it was comforting.
“I’m just waiting for that moment where they’re gonna scream at me and threaten me like they used too. It feels like I’m being snuck up on and I’m just on edge waiting for them to pounce. I haven’t spoken to my father since that day you came and rescued me.” I finished, looking up to his worn out features.
“Sorry, just needed to vent.” I sidetracked my eyes to the napkin holder feeling like an idiot again for baring my soul when Max wouldn’t even do it himself.
“It’s okay.”
“Max?” I spoke after a thoughtful silence fell between us “Do you remember anything of the other night?” The question seemed to tumble out if my mouth.
“Yeah, bits and pieces.” He said slowly as if he were trying to remember right now.
“What do you remember?” I hesitantly asked, Max ducked his head in thought and embarrassment.
“Umm, I fell in the water, then you saved me and you took me home…… Then I kissed you.” Max finished as if he was getting in trouble.
“Before that, what you said to me?” I pushed on hoping to jog his memory.
Max squinted in thought, trying hard to retrace his night and remember what had happened. He finally looked up shaking his head in questioning.
“You told me that you came back after I told I was pregnant and I was asleep.” Max’s features dawned with recollection but his features fell when he realized his confession. It seemed to pain him that he had told me, like a mistake.
“I’m sorry, Liz…I shouldn’t have told you--”
“No Max you should have!” That sudden flood of betrayal and agony swept through me as I remembered that night when I was so scared but so sure that he wouldn’t abandon me. But he did and from my perspective that’s where everything went to hell.
“Why didn’t you wake me or come the next day or the day after that? And don’t say you were terrified.” I bit out the last, repressing the sobs in my throat and the unshed tears in my eyes.
“I don’t know, okay!” Max grunted flipping his head back and dragging his hands down his face in aggravation.
“Bullshit!”
“Well what do you want me to say, Liz? I admit that I did wrong, I was a total dickhead for leaving you like that and I’m forever sorry. I regret it everyday and probably for the rest of my life!”
By this time Max had shot out of his seat and was pacing and fuming at his own mistakes. He seemed trapped in his own mind, torturing himself this very moment. I sunk down more into the booth cushion realizing that I was a cause of this torture as much as him.
“I guess…..one reason would be because of…my brother.” He spoke more calmly after a short torturous moment, I snapped my head up watching as he faced towards the front of the Crashdown staring into space.
“Max….I still don’t understand what you mean by that.” I said slowly while standing up close behind him, I could hear his breath trembled and feel the tension seize up his body. “I know that you feel responsible for his death, but it’s not your fault. And I know that you're scared that you’ll hurt our baby, but I promise you won’t, I know you won’t.”
“How can you be so sure? Right now all this stress and pain that I’ve inflicted could be harming our baby.” He all but whispered, as I was repressing the sudden joy inside me that he had just said ‘our baby’.
“I’m fine” I tenderly whispered as I pulled Max around to face me, his cheeks stained with tears.
“That’s what my Mom said too. After he died I asked my Mom if she was okay, and she lied….she wasn’t fine…she was far, far from it. And it was my fault.” I could barely hear him as he whispered to himself, his eyes were on the floor and I knew he was close to running away from me.
“Max, look at me.” When he refused to do so I framed his face with my hands and forced his watery gaze to mine.
“Max, it’s not your fault. Do you hear? It’s not your fault! Your were a baby yourself, you were not capable of doing something like that.” I searched his face for a slight glimmer of understanding.
“Max, you didn’t kill your brother.” I said painfully as I watched as he wept silently at my words. It was like he had never been told this before.
“BUT YOU WEREN’T THERE!” He yelled abruptly to my face and I stumbled back from his the loud remark.
“My father was right, everyone was right, if it wasn’t for me he’d still be here right now! You have no idea what it’s like to carry that kinda thing over your head.”
“Your father said that to you?” I questioned in disbelief; he shook his head slightly after a minute of pondering silence.
“I overheard him talking to my grandmother when he thought I was in bed.” A bitter and disturbing smile crept across his face as tears still fell freely.
“Max.” I trembled finding the moment heartbreaking, I always knew Phillip Evans was cold hearted, but even that cold?
“I’ve never amounted to anything since that day,” He brought his teary gaze to mine once more “And now it’s happening with you.”
It hit me, it really hit me. Max thought he wasn’t good enough for anything, he thought he was a total failure to people he loved because all his life he was treated that way. His fears ran deeper then just being a teen father; he was terrified to be set up for failure and hurting more people. In his eyes it was like he was cursed to lose everything.
“You don’t think your good enough for me, that’s why you abandoned me…you thought I was better off with out you.” I spoke in disbelief and shock; this side of Max I had never seen before was scary and new all at once. He was baring his soul.
Max took a shuddering breath and nodded slowly as he tried to gain control of his running emotions. At that moment he looked like a lost boy crying in total fear that I was going to shut him out. Like his family did.
“Max I’ve been worse without you. I’ve been through so much pain. It was suffocating me. All I wanted you to do was hold me and tell me everything was all right. I just wanted you to hold my hand through all of this.” I said softly watching as his breathing slowly turned into hiccuping sobs.
“Have I lost you too.” He said while quickly wiping away his teary face
“You almost did.” I trembled out as Max expelled a deep sigh of relief.
When I saw his shoulders begin to shaky violently I couldn’t hold back any longer, I stood on my toes and embraced him tightly as he collapsed into my arms crying into my neck chanting his apologies over and over again. It was a step to recovery and I couldn’t help but let my sobs overtake me too. Max was so broken it hurt my heart to see him that way. Both of us needed to mend our wounds, together.
I knew that I couldn’t just be the doormat and let myself just forgive Max, I’m still hurt by the things he did and I can’t just push that away to make him feel better. I still deserve so much more from him; can I still trust him with my heart?
“Max?” I broke away from his hug when his sobs subsided, “I’m so glad you told me some of this, and part of me wishes that you had said it sooner. But I’m still hurt Max, and I’m scared to trust you.”
Max backed away slightly looking everywhere else but my face and it was killing me to see him like that.
“I understand.” he mumbled, sticking his hands in his pockets, as he continued to back away.
“Max, we’ve been best friends longer then we’ve been a couple…and you broke a trust in both those relationships by sleeping with her.” Max stooped his head lower as I finished my sentence thickly.
“Liz, I was so upset and drunk, I told you I didn’t want to have sex with her. It was the biggest mistake of my life.”
“That doesn’t make it stop hurting.” I whispered painfully, not sure what to say or even do at this point.
“Then what do you want me to do?” He asked with pleading eyes
“I don’t know.” Tears began to fall again, at this moment I was completely numb and I didn’t know where to go from here.
“Get out!” Both Max and I snapped our attention to the staff door to see my father enraged and pointing a threatening finger towards Max.
“Dad!” I yelped in downright shock
“GET THE FUCK OUT!!!” My father screamed once again cutting off my excuse. I turned my head back to Max to see him slowly back away his hands up in defense.
“I was just leaving.” he said calmly, “I don’t want any trouble, Mr. Parker.”
Max backed out of the Crashdown quickly, never once breaking our stare. Once he was out of sight I turned back to my father who was still glaring at the front doors. He turned to me, dropped his furious façade and walked back out with a stone cold expression. I didn’t know if I was relieved or worried by his actions as I just continued to stare at the swinging staff door. I held my breath waiting for his return through that door, but all I could hear was his footsteps thumping up the stairs and a slamming of a door.
It was the first really time I had seen my dad up close since we fought and for lack of better words he looked….bad.
TBC
Forever Changed - [AU M/L MATURE] {COMPLETE}
Moderators: Anniepoo98, Rowedog, ISLANDGIRL5, Itzstacie, truelovepooh, FSU/MSW-94, Erina, Hunter, Forum Moderators
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Hybrid-Angel
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
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Hybrid-Angel
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 57
- Joined: Tue Dec 31, 2002 5:32 pm
- Location: A room with padded walls
Okay heres the next chapter guyz and a new banner i made for my fic, thanks u sooo much for ur patients. 
Chapter 22
“Happy birthday, Liz!”
I bolted up in bed when I heard the simultaneous chorus of a happy birthday thud through my eardrums making me let out a small yelp of surprise. Recovering from sleep and shock I noticed Alex and Maria grinning over me as I grumbled at being woken so early and loudly.
“Oh my god! You guys scared me,” I mumbled grumpily while rubbing sleep from my eyes, “What are you doing here? It’s 6 am”
Alex and Maria gave me a ‘duh’ look as I looked between them still waiting for an answer and trying to wrap the covers more firmly around me before Alex quickly whisked them away. I groaned at his actions, becoming more pissed off.
“Geez, you don’t even have to get out of the wrong side of the bed.” Maria snapped sarcastically
“She puts the phase to shame.” Alex added quickly.
“Mmm.” Maria agreed with a nod.
I groaned once more and snagged the covers back from Alex burying myself underneath them.
“Liz, it’s your birthday today. We must celebrate, party. You remember partying don’t you?” Alex drolly asked as I tried to block them out in an attempt to sleep through this day.
“Yes, Alex.” I said in a deadpan tone, then flipped to covers back to view my two best friends since grade school.
“But what the hell makes you think I’m in a partying mood, my life sucks and celebrating another year to my life isn’t something I’m so interested in doing right now.” I huffed which earned me a pinch from Maria in rebuke. I let out a long ‘Ow’ and rubbed the smarting spot with my other hand.
“What was that for?” I whined
“For being so bitter. Liz your eighteen today and you’ve been shuffling around like death for the past month. And ever since that confrontation with Max last weekend you’ve been sulking even more because he hasn’t spoken to you since.” Maria threw her hands up in exasperation.
“Yes he has, we’ve spoken at school.” I bit back tartly in defense, even though I knew it was the truth.
“Liz an awkward ‘Hello’ doesn’t count.” She snipped back in a dead tone. She was right Max and I hadn’t spoken since that night he came over and we had a decent talk that shared much emotion that needed to be said, but I was a fool to think things would get better. I expected us to at least continue talking but Max had ignored me the entire week at school and when I finally caught up with him, we shared an awkward moment before Max said he had to hurry to class. Had he learnt nothing!
“Liz, we just want to tear you away from all this crap you’re dealing with to have a fun-filled birthday that you deserve.” Alex tenderly said making me snapped out of my torturous thoughts
“Now quit your whining and get dressed, because today we’re kidnapping you.” Alex finished as he and Maria sat more comfortably on my bed, making it obvious that they would not leave without me.
“Fine!” I huffed flipping the covers off me and stomping off to the bathroom.
To my surprise it hadn’t been a bad birthday at all. Today I had totally expected to have the worst day but Maria and Alex made it the best. After blinding folding me and taking me to a secret location I was surprised to find us many miles away from Roswell and at a cool Pancake restaurant where we ate to our heart's content. I was lucky not to get that damned morning sickness so it made the day more so enjoyable.
After that I was once again blindfolded and taken to a fair just off a highway outside of Roswell. Even though with my pregnancy and it being dangerous to go on rides I still enjoyed myself laughing at the fearful faces of Maria and Alex as they went on rides. Alex had thrown up after nearly ever one claiming it to be sympathetic morning sickness.
It was a pure day of light heartened fun; I actually laughed. Laughed with my two best friends like the old days, willingly forgetting what still waited for me in Roswell. Today was my day to relax and enjoy some much needed time with friends, without the hassles of school, parents, pregnancies and Max.
With another round of feasting, laughing and a movie Maria and Alex finally dropped me home and I was still smiling when they drove away saying they’d see me later tonight with my presents.
That smile soon died when I entered my home and realized I had just come back to the weighted worry and pain that I had been living with for over a month. I crept through the house hoping that I’d make a quick escape to my bedroom. I stopped short when I noticed a small chocolate cake with lit candles sitting on the dining table also with a few presents.
“Happy Birthday, Lizzie.” My mom whispered from behind me, I jumped with surprise and spun around holding my quick beating heart.
“Mom, what’s all this?” I asked pointing back to the table of goodies. She slowly walked towards the table as I followed behind her.
“It’s just my baby girl’s birthday and I thought it would be nice to celebrate.” She reached out for my hand and pulled me towards the table to sit me in front of gifts from relatives and a home made cake.
“Go on, open them.” She prodded softly as I cautiously eyed the display in front of me. I slowly unwrapped each present from a relative and not finding each gift particularly uplifting, how was I supposed to just smack on a fake smile when my mother was obvious hiding things from me and my father couldn’t even stand the sight of me. I had questioned her constantly about my father’s behavior but she was always quick to change the subject or make some lame excuse. My father was becoming erratic in his behavior, going from hot to cold and he seemed to shut down when he ever saw me. Like today, we bumped into each other just before I left with Maria and Alex, and he didn’t even mutter a ‘happy birthday’ to me, instead ducked his head and locked himself in his study.
Opening the last gift I held up a knitted scarf scent to me by my great Aunt Margo, god she’s still alive I hadn’t see her seen last year. The familiar soft scent of rose petals that was Aunt Margo’s signature aroma filled my nose as I placed the red scarf around my neck and looked for the gift from my parents…or parent.
“Where’s your gift?’” I asked heavily as I looked up to my Mother who slowly pulled a gift from behind her back and placed it in my hands.
“This is from me personally.” She said softly while pulling out a chair next to me.
I gingerly opened the regular shaped object, becoming aware that my mother was watching each move as if to capture each moment. As I ripped the last of the tissue paper I exposed the rest of the thin box then took one last look at my mother who gave me a small half smile.
I gasped faintly as I pulled a large silver frame from the box that held a picture of Rosa, my parents and me. It was the holiday we had at this small beach; we must have been no older then seven. Rosa and I sat happily of our Mom and Dad’s laps in the sand grinning as a wave crashed around us. I had completely forgotten about these photos, in fact I never really saw any of our family photos any more.
I lifted misty eyes to my mother who also had a lingering tear; it seemed my mother was ready to remember the happier times of the past without my fathers overpowering glare of disapproval.
“It was that summer we spent every day at the beach, you and Rosa would collect shells and made a shell necklace for me…I still have it.” She laughed to herself in sweet memory.
“Rosa wanted to go surfing while you wanted to look at all the rock pools to find all the animals of the ocean. So you and me spent the day walking up and down the beach while your Father and Rosa tried to surf, your dad thinking he was still young enough to do everything.” She chuckled once more as a single tear streamed down her face; I listened attentively while tracing a finger around the edge of the photo.
“I wanted you to have this photo to remember the better times we all had together, before…things got worse.” The way she said it just tipped it off for me, I knew there was some else to the puzzle. I knew she wasn’t referring to just Rosa's death or how I was treated, it was something else. I saw it hidden in her eyes.
“Thank you, I love it.” I whispered before hugging my mother tightly which seemed to break her completely, she wept silently as she held my head close to her heart, much like she use to hold me when I was little.
After a moment or two my mother pulled back wiping away the last of her tears and mine also, she straight herself with that soft smile and pointed to the cake with the candles just moments from burning out. “Make a wish.” She smiled.
With a glance at the now wax covered cake, I closed my eyes running through the wishes I could make finding only one not enough for my long list. With the only one I could think of that seemed the one that need the most wishing, the one that I most hopped for. I took a deep breath.
I wish for Max and I to have a happy ending.
I blew the four candles out without much effort and fingered the chocolate, putting some in my mouth. I had been craving chocolate lately and its sweet taste made my taste buds tingle. But it didn’t distract from the fact that my wish may never come true.
Quickly I snapped out of that thought and watched my mother busy herself with picking up discarded wrapping paper and push three more presents in front of me, labeled from my Mom and Dad. Of course my mom had just put my father's name there; he probably didn’t even know it was my birthday.
I rolled my eyes then continued to unwrap some clothes and some makeup that didn’t compare to the meaningful picture my Mom gave to me, not just because it reflected happier times but because it showed that my mom actually cared about me. Cared about me, I can say it over and over but it’s still unbelievable.
After thanking my mom I started towards my room to shower and change but she stop me by hesitantly saying my name. I slowly turned with most of my gift in my hands or on me and looked to her saddened face and dark eyes. It was like she had aged over night.
“I’m just concerned about you…and your pregnancy.” I froze completely at the moment, I felt uncomfortable to be discussing it.
“What about it?” I questioned fearfully
“Well--”
A slamming of our front door cut my mother off as we both stared in its direction to find my father swaying slightly and smelling badly of cigarettes and alcohol. It was strange to see him that way; he always been in control even when it came to alcohol. He could be dead drunk and still show a straight face.
“Jeff, where have you been?” My mother questioned in annoyance, which only got her a grunted reply, followed by my dad making his way towards the study. But mom didn’t let him go that easily.
“For god's sake the least you can do Jeffery is say Happy Birthday to your daughter.” Mom yelled furiously while I marveled in her stances of bravery.
Dad turned around to give me smug and bitter birthday day wishes then started to turn again but again my mom stopped him.
“Don’t you dare turn your back on your family!” She yelled once again
“You call this a family? How is this a family? It hasn’t been a god damn family since my Rosa was killed!” Dad huffed approaching mom and me.
“It was suicide Jeff, not murder!” She retorted, showing a side of her I hadn’t seen in a long time, a stronger side.
“Like hell it’s wasn’t, those damn ‘friends’ of hers gave her the drugs, they killed her!” My father roared, while I suddenly felt like I was back to the night my dad screamed to the policemen that Rosa had died because of her ‘friends’ even when all the evidence pointed to suicide.
“Jeff, you know as well as me that isn’t the truth, the note proved it!”
“Note, what note? Did Rosa leave a suicide note? Why didn’t you tell me!” I jumped into the fight with no intention of doing so.
“There was no note!” He yelled towards me, “Now go to your room!”
“Stop covering for her, Jeff!” My mother wavered trying hard to hold her ground, “And stop punishing Liz for it.”
I was in totally awe in her last statement; I didn’t know whether to shed a tear or hug her madly because everything I felt in my heart of my parents misunderstanding about me was just voiced by my mother.
“I’m not covering and Liz gets punished on her own accounts, Rosa was never stupid enough to get pregnant or sleep with some asshole who completely disrespects us!”
“No she just took advantage of us, lied to us about the parties, sex and the drugs and killed herself!” She cried out painfully, “Wake up, Jeff Rosa wasn’t perfect!”
“And she is?” Dad pointed to me before storming off and slamming his study door sending chills down my spine.
I looked back to mom who was slightly shaking but still gave the impression that she just stood up to her demons, for me. Without hesitation I dropped all my present into the nearby chair and embraced my mother in a wordless hug.
After a few moments I broke away from her arms, and picked up my presents, “Thank you.” I whispered to her with knowing eyes, transmitting my emotions. With one last look I moved back towards my room and let out a huff of relief. Part of me of was thankful for what just happened and the other part was fearful that things could get worse. Dumping the presents on my bed I was unaware of the shadow moving outside my window.
“Happy Birthday, Liz.” I gasped in surprise to hear his voice behind me.
“Max!” I gasped again clenching my heart as he crawled through the window.
“Hey.”
Chapter 22
“Happy birthday, Liz!”
I bolted up in bed when I heard the simultaneous chorus of a happy birthday thud through my eardrums making me let out a small yelp of surprise. Recovering from sleep and shock I noticed Alex and Maria grinning over me as I grumbled at being woken so early and loudly.
“Oh my god! You guys scared me,” I mumbled grumpily while rubbing sleep from my eyes, “What are you doing here? It’s 6 am”
Alex and Maria gave me a ‘duh’ look as I looked between them still waiting for an answer and trying to wrap the covers more firmly around me before Alex quickly whisked them away. I groaned at his actions, becoming more pissed off.
“Geez, you don’t even have to get out of the wrong side of the bed.” Maria snapped sarcastically
“She puts the phase to shame.” Alex added quickly.
“Mmm.” Maria agreed with a nod.
I groaned once more and snagged the covers back from Alex burying myself underneath them.
“Liz, it’s your birthday today. We must celebrate, party. You remember partying don’t you?” Alex drolly asked as I tried to block them out in an attempt to sleep through this day.
“Yes, Alex.” I said in a deadpan tone, then flipped to covers back to view my two best friends since grade school.
“But what the hell makes you think I’m in a partying mood, my life sucks and celebrating another year to my life isn’t something I’m so interested in doing right now.” I huffed which earned me a pinch from Maria in rebuke. I let out a long ‘Ow’ and rubbed the smarting spot with my other hand.
“What was that for?” I whined
“For being so bitter. Liz your eighteen today and you’ve been shuffling around like death for the past month. And ever since that confrontation with Max last weekend you’ve been sulking even more because he hasn’t spoken to you since.” Maria threw her hands up in exasperation.
“Yes he has, we’ve spoken at school.” I bit back tartly in defense, even though I knew it was the truth.
“Liz an awkward ‘Hello’ doesn’t count.” She snipped back in a dead tone. She was right Max and I hadn’t spoken since that night he came over and we had a decent talk that shared much emotion that needed to be said, but I was a fool to think things would get better. I expected us to at least continue talking but Max had ignored me the entire week at school and when I finally caught up with him, we shared an awkward moment before Max said he had to hurry to class. Had he learnt nothing!
“Liz, we just want to tear you away from all this crap you’re dealing with to have a fun-filled birthday that you deserve.” Alex tenderly said making me snapped out of my torturous thoughts
“Now quit your whining and get dressed, because today we’re kidnapping you.” Alex finished as he and Maria sat more comfortably on my bed, making it obvious that they would not leave without me.
“Fine!” I huffed flipping the covers off me and stomping off to the bathroom.
To my surprise it hadn’t been a bad birthday at all. Today I had totally expected to have the worst day but Maria and Alex made it the best. After blinding folding me and taking me to a secret location I was surprised to find us many miles away from Roswell and at a cool Pancake restaurant where we ate to our heart's content. I was lucky not to get that damned morning sickness so it made the day more so enjoyable.
After that I was once again blindfolded and taken to a fair just off a highway outside of Roswell. Even though with my pregnancy and it being dangerous to go on rides I still enjoyed myself laughing at the fearful faces of Maria and Alex as they went on rides. Alex had thrown up after nearly ever one claiming it to be sympathetic morning sickness.
It was a pure day of light heartened fun; I actually laughed. Laughed with my two best friends like the old days, willingly forgetting what still waited for me in Roswell. Today was my day to relax and enjoy some much needed time with friends, without the hassles of school, parents, pregnancies and Max.
With another round of feasting, laughing and a movie Maria and Alex finally dropped me home and I was still smiling when they drove away saying they’d see me later tonight with my presents.
That smile soon died when I entered my home and realized I had just come back to the weighted worry and pain that I had been living with for over a month. I crept through the house hoping that I’d make a quick escape to my bedroom. I stopped short when I noticed a small chocolate cake with lit candles sitting on the dining table also with a few presents.
“Happy Birthday, Lizzie.” My mom whispered from behind me, I jumped with surprise and spun around holding my quick beating heart.
“Mom, what’s all this?” I asked pointing back to the table of goodies. She slowly walked towards the table as I followed behind her.
“It’s just my baby girl’s birthday and I thought it would be nice to celebrate.” She reached out for my hand and pulled me towards the table to sit me in front of gifts from relatives and a home made cake.
“Go on, open them.” She prodded softly as I cautiously eyed the display in front of me. I slowly unwrapped each present from a relative and not finding each gift particularly uplifting, how was I supposed to just smack on a fake smile when my mother was obvious hiding things from me and my father couldn’t even stand the sight of me. I had questioned her constantly about my father’s behavior but she was always quick to change the subject or make some lame excuse. My father was becoming erratic in his behavior, going from hot to cold and he seemed to shut down when he ever saw me. Like today, we bumped into each other just before I left with Maria and Alex, and he didn’t even mutter a ‘happy birthday’ to me, instead ducked his head and locked himself in his study.
Opening the last gift I held up a knitted scarf scent to me by my great Aunt Margo, god she’s still alive I hadn’t see her seen last year. The familiar soft scent of rose petals that was Aunt Margo’s signature aroma filled my nose as I placed the red scarf around my neck and looked for the gift from my parents…or parent.
“Where’s your gift?’” I asked heavily as I looked up to my Mother who slowly pulled a gift from behind her back and placed it in my hands.
“This is from me personally.” She said softly while pulling out a chair next to me.
I gingerly opened the regular shaped object, becoming aware that my mother was watching each move as if to capture each moment. As I ripped the last of the tissue paper I exposed the rest of the thin box then took one last look at my mother who gave me a small half smile.
I gasped faintly as I pulled a large silver frame from the box that held a picture of Rosa, my parents and me. It was the holiday we had at this small beach; we must have been no older then seven. Rosa and I sat happily of our Mom and Dad’s laps in the sand grinning as a wave crashed around us. I had completely forgotten about these photos, in fact I never really saw any of our family photos any more.
I lifted misty eyes to my mother who also had a lingering tear; it seemed my mother was ready to remember the happier times of the past without my fathers overpowering glare of disapproval.
“It was that summer we spent every day at the beach, you and Rosa would collect shells and made a shell necklace for me…I still have it.” She laughed to herself in sweet memory.
“Rosa wanted to go surfing while you wanted to look at all the rock pools to find all the animals of the ocean. So you and me spent the day walking up and down the beach while your Father and Rosa tried to surf, your dad thinking he was still young enough to do everything.” She chuckled once more as a single tear streamed down her face; I listened attentively while tracing a finger around the edge of the photo.
“I wanted you to have this photo to remember the better times we all had together, before…things got worse.” The way she said it just tipped it off for me, I knew there was some else to the puzzle. I knew she wasn’t referring to just Rosa's death or how I was treated, it was something else. I saw it hidden in her eyes.
“Thank you, I love it.” I whispered before hugging my mother tightly which seemed to break her completely, she wept silently as she held my head close to her heart, much like she use to hold me when I was little.
After a moment or two my mother pulled back wiping away the last of her tears and mine also, she straight herself with that soft smile and pointed to the cake with the candles just moments from burning out. “Make a wish.” She smiled.
With a glance at the now wax covered cake, I closed my eyes running through the wishes I could make finding only one not enough for my long list. With the only one I could think of that seemed the one that need the most wishing, the one that I most hopped for. I took a deep breath.
I wish for Max and I to have a happy ending.
I blew the four candles out without much effort and fingered the chocolate, putting some in my mouth. I had been craving chocolate lately and its sweet taste made my taste buds tingle. But it didn’t distract from the fact that my wish may never come true.
Quickly I snapped out of that thought and watched my mother busy herself with picking up discarded wrapping paper and push three more presents in front of me, labeled from my Mom and Dad. Of course my mom had just put my father's name there; he probably didn’t even know it was my birthday.
I rolled my eyes then continued to unwrap some clothes and some makeup that didn’t compare to the meaningful picture my Mom gave to me, not just because it reflected happier times but because it showed that my mom actually cared about me. Cared about me, I can say it over and over but it’s still unbelievable.
After thanking my mom I started towards my room to shower and change but she stop me by hesitantly saying my name. I slowly turned with most of my gift in my hands or on me and looked to her saddened face and dark eyes. It was like she had aged over night.
“I’m just concerned about you…and your pregnancy.” I froze completely at the moment, I felt uncomfortable to be discussing it.
“What about it?” I questioned fearfully
“Well--”
A slamming of our front door cut my mother off as we both stared in its direction to find my father swaying slightly and smelling badly of cigarettes and alcohol. It was strange to see him that way; he always been in control even when it came to alcohol. He could be dead drunk and still show a straight face.
“Jeff, where have you been?” My mother questioned in annoyance, which only got her a grunted reply, followed by my dad making his way towards the study. But mom didn’t let him go that easily.
“For god's sake the least you can do Jeffery is say Happy Birthday to your daughter.” Mom yelled furiously while I marveled in her stances of bravery.
Dad turned around to give me smug and bitter birthday day wishes then started to turn again but again my mom stopped him.
“Don’t you dare turn your back on your family!” She yelled once again
“You call this a family? How is this a family? It hasn’t been a god damn family since my Rosa was killed!” Dad huffed approaching mom and me.
“It was suicide Jeff, not murder!” She retorted, showing a side of her I hadn’t seen in a long time, a stronger side.
“Like hell it’s wasn’t, those damn ‘friends’ of hers gave her the drugs, they killed her!” My father roared, while I suddenly felt like I was back to the night my dad screamed to the policemen that Rosa had died because of her ‘friends’ even when all the evidence pointed to suicide.
“Jeff, you know as well as me that isn’t the truth, the note proved it!”
“Note, what note? Did Rosa leave a suicide note? Why didn’t you tell me!” I jumped into the fight with no intention of doing so.
“There was no note!” He yelled towards me, “Now go to your room!”
“Stop covering for her, Jeff!” My mother wavered trying hard to hold her ground, “And stop punishing Liz for it.”
I was in totally awe in her last statement; I didn’t know whether to shed a tear or hug her madly because everything I felt in my heart of my parents misunderstanding about me was just voiced by my mother.
“I’m not covering and Liz gets punished on her own accounts, Rosa was never stupid enough to get pregnant or sleep with some asshole who completely disrespects us!”
“No she just took advantage of us, lied to us about the parties, sex and the drugs and killed herself!” She cried out painfully, “Wake up, Jeff Rosa wasn’t perfect!”
“And she is?” Dad pointed to me before storming off and slamming his study door sending chills down my spine.
I looked back to mom who was slightly shaking but still gave the impression that she just stood up to her demons, for me. Without hesitation I dropped all my present into the nearby chair and embraced my mother in a wordless hug.
After a few moments I broke away from her arms, and picked up my presents, “Thank you.” I whispered to her with knowing eyes, transmitting my emotions. With one last look I moved back towards my room and let out a huff of relief. Part of me of was thankful for what just happened and the other part was fearful that things could get worse. Dumping the presents on my bed I was unaware of the shadow moving outside my window.
“Happy Birthday, Liz.” I gasped in surprise to hear his voice behind me.
“Max!” I gasped again clenching my heart as he crawled through the window.
“Hey.”
Last edited by Hybrid-Angel on Sat May 01, 2004 10:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.
-
Hybrid-Angel
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 57
- Joined: Tue Dec 31, 2002 5:32 pm
- Location: A room with padded walls
Thanks Azngurl- just wait ya read this part.
and thanks for bumping Karyn, the fics needs it every now and then.
Okay, here's the next part i hope you guyz enjoy.
Chapter 23
“What are you doing here?” I questioned as I moved over to my door to close it, if my father saw Max in here he’d have his head for sure.
“Well seeing it’s your birthday I thought I’d drop in and give you this.” Max held out a small wrapped up box while I took a step closer to examine it.
“What is it?” I looked at the present as if it would bite me at any minute.
“Open it and find out.” He said as he took a step closer to me, close enough that I could almost smell his cologne.
I plucked the small box from his fingers and slowly opened the gift that I wasn’t so sure I should be opening to begin with. I snapped open the velvet box and found the most beautiful mother of pearl pendant inside.
“Remember when you looked through that magazine and saw a model wearing a mother of pearl pendant and you said you had always wanted one,” I nodded my head still in awe of the gorgeous shimmer of the pendant
“Well since then I made it a mission to find one for you for your eighteenth. Do you like it?” Do I like it! Is he kidding I love it, he always had this way of finding out what I most wanted as a gift, but it’s ironic that he doesn’t see what I want from him. My smile faded then.
“I can’t accept this, Max.” I closed the box and held it out for him to take, his boyish features crashed from joy to pain.
“Why? It’s your birthday present, it’s yours,” he pouted
“Max, I can’t take this gift. It’s just something you’re giving me to make things better,” I finished flatly still holding the box out for him but he refused to take it.
“You think I’m giving you this to distract you from the past week. An ‘I’m sorry’ gift?” Max wavered in a hurt tone
“Well given the timing I’d say yes. This entire week you’ve ignored me completely after what I thought was a breakthrough last weekend but instead you shut down again leaving me in the dark. It’s like I don’t even know you any more.” I accused quietly. I was afraid a loud tone would bring my parents in here.
“I got this present for you long before all this happened; it’s not a petty gift to try and pry my way back into your life, Liz. I just wanted to give it to you because I care about you.” He despondently explained ducking his head slightly
“If you care about me why have you ignored me?” I questioned.
“Because I care about you.” He explained while bring his tender eyes back up to mine.
“What?” I breathed out in perplexity. Max pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and index finger slightly shaking his head.
“Because my father threatened me to leave you alone.”
“He threatened you?” I repeated in disbelief.
“Yes, is that so hard to believe? His got every teacher on surveillance making sure I’m not talking to you. And if I’m seen with you he threatens to make our lives a living hell.”
“Like it already isn’t.” I huffed sarcastically.
“Believe me it can get worse.” He stated while running his fingers through his dark hair.
“How?” I questioned fearfully, already I couldn’t deal with most the stuff I was going through but to have more would just tip it over the edge.
“He wanted to get rid of the baby.” Max said gingerly. Automatically I placed a hand on my stomach and took a step back shaking my head quickly; Max took a step forward to frame my face with his hands.
“I won’t let him, I told him he can’t touch you or I’d leave the family. He wouldn’t take that chance because his business future relies on me.” Max gently stated with full honesty. I jerked my head in an understanding nod but the thought alone was daunting, Mr. Evans had taken things to the next level, it seemed he would do anything necessary for himself.
“What else did he threaten to do?” The question just slipped out and I wasn’t sure if I was ready for an answer.
“He thinks that you’re a liability to me and my future, which means he thinks you’ll earn me a bad reputation in the family business. Being an unmarried father at eighteen is a field day to the press.” Max finished in bitterness shaking his head.
“Do you think that?” I lowered my head feeling like I was nothing to no one, just something everyone finds annoying, a burden.
“Of course not.” He placed his fingers under my chin to lift my eyes to his. His eyes swam with pure truth and concern; my doubts were put at ease.
“Liz, you know how much I hate the media hype that surrounds my family, you know I don’t care what they think or what my family thinks.”
“What about Isabel?” I drolly asked through fading tears.
“She’s my sister; I’m not supposed to listen to her.” Max said with a smile that I gladly returned.
“I wish you told me at beginning of the week.” I said mournfully.
“I couldn’t. I was constantly watched for the first two days; even your Dad was in on it.”
“What?” I suddenly felt a chill run through my body.
“My father and your father made an agreement for us to stay away from each other, that’s why your Dad screamed at me to get out last weekend…. but also because he hates me.”
“My Dad saw your dad again?”
“I don’t know I was only told that night to stay away from you, they could have talked before hand.” I collapsed on my bed in disbelief; things just went from strange to complete insanity.
“How can this be happening? From just one mistake it’s had this catastrophic domino effect on our lives. I wish we could go back.”
I groaned into my hands, and then raked my fingers through my hair.
“Me too.” Max said as he sat down next to me rubbing my back gently in comfort in the growing silence.
“Thank you.”
“For what?” Max questioned in bewilderment turning his gaze to me.
“For this,” I held up the velvet box opening it again, “I love it, it’s beautiful.”
“Your welcome.” He warmly smiled
I leaned in to just give him a small kiss of gratitude, but when our lips met softly but very briefly something new sparked between us, something that was being sealed with that wordless kiss. Something was mending between us. Our love.
Quick to save ourselves from an awkward moment Max reached behind me to pick up the photo frame that lay on my bed among the other presents. He examined it for a few moments.
“Where was this?” He chuckled at the happy family portrait.
“I don’t remember, I think it was a small beach near my grandparents house. I think I was about four years old.” I looked at the photo also, trying to see what Max saw as he continued to study it.
“I can’t wait for moments like this.” He spoke whisper-soft as he traced one finger over my four- year- old face.
“Really?” I tenderly asked, taken aback by the idea that Max thought of us having a future with our child. It made my heart do a funny little flip.
“Yeah, I always wanted a little girl,” he whispered with smiling eyes. Again my heart flipped and pounded in my chest, it was like my heart was swelling to the size of a balloon and would burst any moment. Max was talking to me like he used too, he was talking to me like we should be and it brought tears to my eyes that he wanted this baby. That he was finding joy in the fact that he was now a father.
“Me too.” I said through tears as I placed my hand on top of his which made him look up to my tear-stained face. He then softly brushed away my salty tears and his warm eyes focused on me.
“What’s wrong?” He asked in worry and uncertainty.
“Nothing…it’s just you're talking to me.” I quavered earnestly
“Of course I’m talking to you.” He softly laughed still framing my face with his larger, warm hands, “Why wouldn’t I be?”
“I don’t know,” I shrugged looking away from his face “Because you're scared to tell me what you really feel.” I slowly brought my gaze back to his, somewhat fearful that he’d go into shut down again.
“Liz, I’ve always told you what I feel.”
“But what about your brother…. and when I told you I was pregnant?” I spoke weakly. I found myself now scared to confront him, because it always ran the risk of him shutting down on me again. And I don’t think my heart wouldn’t be able to take it again.
Max dropped his hand from my face and I felt my heart drop with them. The dread of pushing him away again hung over me and I felt those aggravating tears sting the back of my eyes.
“Liz,”
Here it was again I’ve pushed him away again, I’ve caused myself this tumult again. I could already hear my heart breaking when he lowered his eyes and I held my breath in anticipation. But then I felt his hand hold onto mine, his thumbs gently caressing the back of my hand; and that leaden weight of dread lifted at the moment of his tender touch.
“Okay, you got me there.” He smiled to me, which earned him a short outburst of laughter from me.
“I shouldn’t have just bottled that up or run away. It didn’t solve anything. And a simple sorry just doesn’t cover how much I regret what I did.”
“I know.” I said with a sniff. “I know you regret it, it stills hurts but I know you’re sorry.”
“So does that mean you forgive me?” Max speculated with a questioning glare.
“Just a little.” I emphasized drolly with my fingers held up in a slight gap.
“Funny, Parker.” Max nudged my shoulder with a smile.
A smile, he was smiling with me and I was smiling back. I never imagined this to ever happen again, us sitting so close smiling and talking to each other while still aware of the damage we have unleashed on each other.
“So I heard some screaming before, another fight with your parents?” Max questioned after a few moments of peaceful silence.
“Uh, yeah. My dad came in liquored up and my mom just took this stance for me, me! She completely knocked me off my feet by standing up for me.” I said still in awe of her words, words I’ve wanted to hear come out of her mouth for years.
“What did she say?” Max asked giving me his full attention.
“That my dad should stop covering for Rosa and punishing me for all her wrongs.” I said, feeling like it was some dream that this had been so forcefully voiced to my father.
“Wow.”
“Yeah I know. She said something else too, and I can’t stop thinking about it,” I muttered picking at my fingers in thought.
“What?” Max asked quietly, placing his hand on my fingers to stop them from fidgeting.
“She said Rosa left a suicide note, but my father denies it like some government secret,” I sighed, “I’ve never really got all the details of the night she died, don’t want to I guess, but I never thought there was a note.”
“Do you think there’s something on there about you?” He asked with concerned eyes, like I would break at any minute.
“I don’t know, I guess I’d like to know but I wouldn’t know where to find it.” I was somewhat apprehensive about it, knowing there was a note kinda scared me.
“You could start at the police station, they keep records of everything. Maybe they have it or at least a copy if your parents kept it.”
“Yeah.” I mumbled, thoughts clouding my mind, the idea of going and finding this note seemed unreal to me, that I would be finding the last thoughts and words of my late sister. A person I feel such anger for, for leaving me, for not being the sister I loved before the drugs and alcohol, for making our parents into this train wreck. For making me unwanted.
“Liz?” Max jolted me from my thoughts and I whipped around to view his softened features and rumbled spiky hair “Do you want me to help you find this note?”
I merely stared at him for a moment entranced by his question, and I was surprised when I nodded my head slowly. The note meant something to my father, like he's hiding something and I want to know why.
“Wait, but what about your father, won’t he find out we will be together?” I became aware again that we were forbidden to see each other, even when I wasn’t informed.
“We can work around it.” Max casually spoke but we both knew it would be difficult. Max took hold of my hand in his again and faced me completely. “We can get through all this okay? I want us to be friends again, Liz we need each other more then ever. We’re worse apart.” His tender tone made my heart swell for the second time and tears threatened to fall.
“I couldn’t have said it better. I want to be friends again too.” I sniffed before wrapping my arms around Max’s neck to give him a warm hug, which he gladly returned.
“Good, now that we're friends again can you promise me something?” Max said as he broke away from our hug.
“What?”
“Can you please go see a doctor about the baby, I’ve been really scared about all this stress you’ve been through, and I’m scared it might hurt the baby.” Again my heart swelled to a balloon size, I was sure it might burst just hearing Max refer to our baby made me smile from ear to ear.
“Okay. I’ll ring for an appointment tomorrow.” I promised wholeheartedly
“Great.” Max said quickly kissing my forehead and standing up.
“Where are you going?” I said while quickly standing, I didn’t want this moment to end.
“I have to get back before a search party is sent out, my father thinks I’m going for my nightly jog. I’ll try and come over tomorrow night.”
“Okay, I’ll see ya then.” And like that Max was out the window and down the old iron ladder. I quickly spun back around and snapped open the velvet box that held the beautiful necklace Max gave me.
I ran my finger over the small shimmering square and then plucked it from the box while walking over to my long length mirror. Placing my hair to one side I clasped the silver necklace and stood back in awe at the gorgeous gift. Definitely my best present yet, next to the photo my mom gave me. I ran my fingers over it I few more time before I turned around to look over the other gifts I received.
My birthday wasn’t turning out to be as bad as I had expected; even the fight between my parents was good in some ways. The fact that my Mom was breaking out from the shadows and standing up for me like she never really did before. And having Max come here and us rekindle something we used to have just made my body tremble.
I was finally having an upside to my life, no more lingering turmoil or at least less than usual. I just felt this bright light burning inside me growing at every minute because it seemed that things were turning out better instead of spiraling further and further out of control.
I looked to the mirror and held the pendent in my hand once more a secret smile widened on my face because I realized that maybe birthday wishes do come true.
and thanks for bumping Karyn, the fics needs it every now and then.
Okay, here's the next part i hope you guyz enjoy.
Chapter 23
“What are you doing here?” I questioned as I moved over to my door to close it, if my father saw Max in here he’d have his head for sure.
“Well seeing it’s your birthday I thought I’d drop in and give you this.” Max held out a small wrapped up box while I took a step closer to examine it.
“What is it?” I looked at the present as if it would bite me at any minute.
“Open it and find out.” He said as he took a step closer to me, close enough that I could almost smell his cologne.
I plucked the small box from his fingers and slowly opened the gift that I wasn’t so sure I should be opening to begin with. I snapped open the velvet box and found the most beautiful mother of pearl pendant inside.
“Remember when you looked through that magazine and saw a model wearing a mother of pearl pendant and you said you had always wanted one,” I nodded my head still in awe of the gorgeous shimmer of the pendant
“Well since then I made it a mission to find one for you for your eighteenth. Do you like it?” Do I like it! Is he kidding I love it, he always had this way of finding out what I most wanted as a gift, but it’s ironic that he doesn’t see what I want from him. My smile faded then.
“I can’t accept this, Max.” I closed the box and held it out for him to take, his boyish features crashed from joy to pain.
“Why? It’s your birthday present, it’s yours,” he pouted
“Max, I can’t take this gift. It’s just something you’re giving me to make things better,” I finished flatly still holding the box out for him but he refused to take it.
“You think I’m giving you this to distract you from the past week. An ‘I’m sorry’ gift?” Max wavered in a hurt tone
“Well given the timing I’d say yes. This entire week you’ve ignored me completely after what I thought was a breakthrough last weekend but instead you shut down again leaving me in the dark. It’s like I don’t even know you any more.” I accused quietly. I was afraid a loud tone would bring my parents in here.
“I got this present for you long before all this happened; it’s not a petty gift to try and pry my way back into your life, Liz. I just wanted to give it to you because I care about you.” He despondently explained ducking his head slightly
“If you care about me why have you ignored me?” I questioned.
“Because I care about you.” He explained while bring his tender eyes back up to mine.
“What?” I breathed out in perplexity. Max pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and index finger slightly shaking his head.
“Because my father threatened me to leave you alone.”
“He threatened you?” I repeated in disbelief.
“Yes, is that so hard to believe? His got every teacher on surveillance making sure I’m not talking to you. And if I’m seen with you he threatens to make our lives a living hell.”
“Like it already isn’t.” I huffed sarcastically.
“Believe me it can get worse.” He stated while running his fingers through his dark hair.
“How?” I questioned fearfully, already I couldn’t deal with most the stuff I was going through but to have more would just tip it over the edge.
“He wanted to get rid of the baby.” Max said gingerly. Automatically I placed a hand on my stomach and took a step back shaking my head quickly; Max took a step forward to frame my face with his hands.
“I won’t let him, I told him he can’t touch you or I’d leave the family. He wouldn’t take that chance because his business future relies on me.” Max gently stated with full honesty. I jerked my head in an understanding nod but the thought alone was daunting, Mr. Evans had taken things to the next level, it seemed he would do anything necessary for himself.
“What else did he threaten to do?” The question just slipped out and I wasn’t sure if I was ready for an answer.
“He thinks that you’re a liability to me and my future, which means he thinks you’ll earn me a bad reputation in the family business. Being an unmarried father at eighteen is a field day to the press.” Max finished in bitterness shaking his head.
“Do you think that?” I lowered my head feeling like I was nothing to no one, just something everyone finds annoying, a burden.
“Of course not.” He placed his fingers under my chin to lift my eyes to his. His eyes swam with pure truth and concern; my doubts were put at ease.
“Liz, you know how much I hate the media hype that surrounds my family, you know I don’t care what they think or what my family thinks.”
“What about Isabel?” I drolly asked through fading tears.
“She’s my sister; I’m not supposed to listen to her.” Max said with a smile that I gladly returned.
“I wish you told me at beginning of the week.” I said mournfully.
“I couldn’t. I was constantly watched for the first two days; even your Dad was in on it.”
“What?” I suddenly felt a chill run through my body.
“My father and your father made an agreement for us to stay away from each other, that’s why your Dad screamed at me to get out last weekend…. but also because he hates me.”
“My Dad saw your dad again?”
“I don’t know I was only told that night to stay away from you, they could have talked before hand.” I collapsed on my bed in disbelief; things just went from strange to complete insanity.
“How can this be happening? From just one mistake it’s had this catastrophic domino effect on our lives. I wish we could go back.”
I groaned into my hands, and then raked my fingers through my hair.
“Me too.” Max said as he sat down next to me rubbing my back gently in comfort in the growing silence.
“Thank you.”
“For what?” Max questioned in bewilderment turning his gaze to me.
“For this,” I held up the velvet box opening it again, “I love it, it’s beautiful.”
“Your welcome.” He warmly smiled
I leaned in to just give him a small kiss of gratitude, but when our lips met softly but very briefly something new sparked between us, something that was being sealed with that wordless kiss. Something was mending between us. Our love.
Quick to save ourselves from an awkward moment Max reached behind me to pick up the photo frame that lay on my bed among the other presents. He examined it for a few moments.
“Where was this?” He chuckled at the happy family portrait.
“I don’t remember, I think it was a small beach near my grandparents house. I think I was about four years old.” I looked at the photo also, trying to see what Max saw as he continued to study it.
“I can’t wait for moments like this.” He spoke whisper-soft as he traced one finger over my four- year- old face.
“Really?” I tenderly asked, taken aback by the idea that Max thought of us having a future with our child. It made my heart do a funny little flip.
“Yeah, I always wanted a little girl,” he whispered with smiling eyes. Again my heart flipped and pounded in my chest, it was like my heart was swelling to the size of a balloon and would burst any moment. Max was talking to me like he used too, he was talking to me like we should be and it brought tears to my eyes that he wanted this baby. That he was finding joy in the fact that he was now a father.
“Me too.” I said through tears as I placed my hand on top of his which made him look up to my tear-stained face. He then softly brushed away my salty tears and his warm eyes focused on me.
“What’s wrong?” He asked in worry and uncertainty.
“Nothing…it’s just you're talking to me.” I quavered earnestly
“Of course I’m talking to you.” He softly laughed still framing my face with his larger, warm hands, “Why wouldn’t I be?”
“I don’t know,” I shrugged looking away from his face “Because you're scared to tell me what you really feel.” I slowly brought my gaze back to his, somewhat fearful that he’d go into shut down again.
“Liz, I’ve always told you what I feel.”
“But what about your brother…. and when I told you I was pregnant?” I spoke weakly. I found myself now scared to confront him, because it always ran the risk of him shutting down on me again. And I don’t think my heart wouldn’t be able to take it again.
Max dropped his hand from my face and I felt my heart drop with them. The dread of pushing him away again hung over me and I felt those aggravating tears sting the back of my eyes.
“Liz,”
Here it was again I’ve pushed him away again, I’ve caused myself this tumult again. I could already hear my heart breaking when he lowered his eyes and I held my breath in anticipation. But then I felt his hand hold onto mine, his thumbs gently caressing the back of my hand; and that leaden weight of dread lifted at the moment of his tender touch.
“Okay, you got me there.” He smiled to me, which earned him a short outburst of laughter from me.
“I shouldn’t have just bottled that up or run away. It didn’t solve anything. And a simple sorry just doesn’t cover how much I regret what I did.”
“I know.” I said with a sniff. “I know you regret it, it stills hurts but I know you’re sorry.”
“So does that mean you forgive me?” Max speculated with a questioning glare.
“Just a little.” I emphasized drolly with my fingers held up in a slight gap.
“Funny, Parker.” Max nudged my shoulder with a smile.
A smile, he was smiling with me and I was smiling back. I never imagined this to ever happen again, us sitting so close smiling and talking to each other while still aware of the damage we have unleashed on each other.
“So I heard some screaming before, another fight with your parents?” Max questioned after a few moments of peaceful silence.
“Uh, yeah. My dad came in liquored up and my mom just took this stance for me, me! She completely knocked me off my feet by standing up for me.” I said still in awe of her words, words I’ve wanted to hear come out of her mouth for years.
“What did she say?” Max asked giving me his full attention.
“That my dad should stop covering for Rosa and punishing me for all her wrongs.” I said, feeling like it was some dream that this had been so forcefully voiced to my father.
“Wow.”
“Yeah I know. She said something else too, and I can’t stop thinking about it,” I muttered picking at my fingers in thought.
“What?” Max asked quietly, placing his hand on my fingers to stop them from fidgeting.
“She said Rosa left a suicide note, but my father denies it like some government secret,” I sighed, “I’ve never really got all the details of the night she died, don’t want to I guess, but I never thought there was a note.”
“Do you think there’s something on there about you?” He asked with concerned eyes, like I would break at any minute.
“I don’t know, I guess I’d like to know but I wouldn’t know where to find it.” I was somewhat apprehensive about it, knowing there was a note kinda scared me.
“You could start at the police station, they keep records of everything. Maybe they have it or at least a copy if your parents kept it.”
“Yeah.” I mumbled, thoughts clouding my mind, the idea of going and finding this note seemed unreal to me, that I would be finding the last thoughts and words of my late sister. A person I feel such anger for, for leaving me, for not being the sister I loved before the drugs and alcohol, for making our parents into this train wreck. For making me unwanted.
“Liz?” Max jolted me from my thoughts and I whipped around to view his softened features and rumbled spiky hair “Do you want me to help you find this note?”
I merely stared at him for a moment entranced by his question, and I was surprised when I nodded my head slowly. The note meant something to my father, like he's hiding something and I want to know why.
“Wait, but what about your father, won’t he find out we will be together?” I became aware again that we were forbidden to see each other, even when I wasn’t informed.
“We can work around it.” Max casually spoke but we both knew it would be difficult. Max took hold of my hand in his again and faced me completely. “We can get through all this okay? I want us to be friends again, Liz we need each other more then ever. We’re worse apart.” His tender tone made my heart swell for the second time and tears threatened to fall.
“I couldn’t have said it better. I want to be friends again too.” I sniffed before wrapping my arms around Max’s neck to give him a warm hug, which he gladly returned.
“Good, now that we're friends again can you promise me something?” Max said as he broke away from our hug.
“What?”
“Can you please go see a doctor about the baby, I’ve been really scared about all this stress you’ve been through, and I’m scared it might hurt the baby.” Again my heart swelled to a balloon size, I was sure it might burst just hearing Max refer to our baby made me smile from ear to ear.
“Okay. I’ll ring for an appointment tomorrow.” I promised wholeheartedly
“Great.” Max said quickly kissing my forehead and standing up.
“Where are you going?” I said while quickly standing, I didn’t want this moment to end.
“I have to get back before a search party is sent out, my father thinks I’m going for my nightly jog. I’ll try and come over tomorrow night.”
“Okay, I’ll see ya then.” And like that Max was out the window and down the old iron ladder. I quickly spun back around and snapped open the velvet box that held the beautiful necklace Max gave me.
I ran my finger over the small shimmering square and then plucked it from the box while walking over to my long length mirror. Placing my hair to one side I clasped the silver necklace and stood back in awe at the gorgeous gift. Definitely my best present yet, next to the photo my mom gave me. I ran my fingers over it I few more time before I turned around to look over the other gifts I received.
My birthday wasn’t turning out to be as bad as I had expected; even the fight between my parents was good in some ways. The fact that my Mom was breaking out from the shadows and standing up for me like she never really did before. And having Max come here and us rekindle something we used to have just made my body tremble.
I was finally having an upside to my life, no more lingering turmoil or at least less than usual. I just felt this bright light burning inside me growing at every minute because it seemed that things were turning out better instead of spiraling further and further out of control.
I looked to the mirror and held the pendent in my hand once more a secret smile widened on my face because I realized that maybe birthday wishes do come true.
-
Hybrid-Angel
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 57
- Joined: Tue Dec 31, 2002 5:32 pm
- Location: A room with padded walls
Ahhh My lil Mar-garita! Bella, don't feel bad i know what it's like to get around to all the fic ya wana read. i'm just glad ur here.
Okay kiddies, thanks you soooo much for ur patience so i got the next chapter as a treat
enjoy!
Chapter 24
“Liz, honey breakfast is ready.” I heard my mother speak over me as I shifted under my covers groaning at being disturbed from my slumber as she exited the room as quickly as she entered. But even when I still wanted to sleep I still couldn’t help but wake up to a beautiful, warm, sunny day. It had been like that for the past few days sunny, chipper days where my mom would wake me like she used when I was a kid and then make me a hearty breakfast.
I stretched my arms and legs and rubbed the sleep from eyes when I suddenly smelt blueberry pancakes on the morning air. Bolting from my bed I dashed to my bathroom and began my morning routine of brushing, showering and readying myself for the day. I hadn’t felt this alive in so long, I practical buzzed.
The reason why I felt this good was because things were finally going my way. Mom and I have developed this bond that I won’t change for the world, it’s not to say that we’re like Rory and Lorelei on the ‘Gilmore Girls’ but still it something more then what we had. It’s a normal mother daughter relationship something I’ve wanted for quiet some time.
Also I went for my doctor’s appointment the other day and everything seems fine according to Dr Morgan Jennings, my now official doctor. She’s a sweet person who’s handled many teen pregnancies, thanks to my mom for her connections. I now have a check once a month and then every week when it gets closer to the due date, which should be late August. It really freaked me out to go, like I was officially becoming a future mother but I promised Max and that’s all it took.
And of course there was my situation with Max, he has made it to my house every night ever since my birthday just to chat, whether it deep and meaningful or lighthearted. Because he covers it up by saying to his father that he’s going for his nightly jog we only talk for an hour or so, but I look forward to that hour everyday like a lifeline.
Max has revealed more and more about his brother and family issues then he ever did before, it’s like I’m truly seeing him. I found out that his Mom’s heavy depression was the cause of his father’s embittered ways; Max said that when his brother died, his parents died with him. Even through tears Max still opened his heart like he never did before, because he was always so afraid too.
I realized that his reasons for repressing his emotions towards his brother were taught to him from a very young age, he would recall to me his deepest and most painful memories of what happened after his brother's death. Like his mother being bedridden for over a year and not really speaking to Max and his father’s shutting down completely which made him work harder and spend less time at home.
Max even learnt from that early age to never speak his brother’s name again and he still doesn’t to this day. I only know his name was Jeremy because Alex had told me from the family connection between his parents and Max’s.
Max had showed me the part of his life he kept tucked away in the dark corners of his heart and it made me realize just how fortunate I was. Okay given that my family is a train wreck, my mother hiding something, avoiding my questions about my father or why our family became like this and my father’s being beyond sane I still had a happy childhood, my family was normal before it kinda hit a pin point and went down hill from there, before the whole Rosa thing.
For the first time in my life I could see what was going on, I wasn’t in the dark as much as I was before. I could see the pain in Max’s eyes and felt his loneliness when he huddled close to me the other night while we sat on my balcony wordlessly watching the stars. Even with the pain in my life, he endured much worse and I was so blinded by my pathetic complaints of having the worst life ever that I didn’t see that Max’s pain ran deeper than just a fight between him and his Dad.
And that’s what I plan to tell him tonight, that I should have recognized his pain and stop putting the spotlight on my issues. That I should have listened, and been a better girlfriend.
“Liz, c’mon your food's getting cold!” My mom yelled from the kitchen while I hurried around my room in a robe and towel on my head.
Through my favorite pair of jeans I stopped short when I sighted the even growing bump in my abdomen, even though Dr. Jennings said I had lost quite an amount of weight I was still showing.
I turned to my side and kept my face on the mirror as I ran one hand over the small bump in my tummy letting a small smile spread across my face that a small little person was now growing inside of me.
A smell of those blueberry pancakes my mom made for me and Rosa when we were little wafted in, and I threw on my T-shirt and dashed out my door to only be stopped in my tracks when I reached the middle of the hallway in front of my father's study.
What made me stop mid-dash for those mouth-watering pancakes was the fact that the door to the study was just opened a faction. This was odd because my father locked it every time, it was never unlocked.
My fingers itched to push the door open and see what my father had been doing in the room all this time, he basically lived in there.
With a quick look down the hall towards the kitchen I took a step forward and lightly placed one hand on the door. Pushing the door slightly it creaked sharply and loudly, I froze completely like I was going to be caught out any minute. After a few minutes I continued to open the door and stepped into the dark, musty room. The air hung heavy with dust and the swirling smells of alcohol; it was obvious that the study’s windows hadn’t been open in days.
I came fully into the room, noticing that my father wasn’t in it; his desk was littered with papers, photos, empty bottles and videotapes. Ashtrays, bottles and papers also littered the floor, while the small T.V and video recorder sat opposite his desk showing a snowing screen. It filled the room with flicking light and the humming of the fuzzy screen.
Walking over to the desk I picked up one of the tapes, the label read ‘Rosa and Liz playing’, I picked up another one ‘Rosa’s recital’ and another ‘Rosa’s first step’. I glanced at the littered surface of the desk, photos of Rosa, and some of me spread out everywhere.
I hadn’t seen these photos in years; I didn’t even know where they all went too. I remember one day a couple of months after Rosa’s death I couldn’t find a single album that had Rosa in it. Come to think of it, all photo of Rosa that were on the mantle piece and on coffee tables had gone straight after her death, excepted for the school photo of her in my parent’s bedroom along with mine. It’s like they had all disappeared and now here they were all in front of me.
I circled around the desk and sat in the recliner chair that now had my father's imprint in it. I picked up a few photos and marveled at how much I had forgotten what she looked like. The resemblance between us was uncanny, the only difference was that I had dark brown eyes and Rosa had crystal blue eyes like Dad’s.
I flicked through another batch of photos and stopped when I saw Rosa looking about five and me as a baby in her lap. I gave the camera a toothless grin as Rosa hugged me tight also giving a big cheeky grin.
I suddenly notice out the corner of my eye as that there was a tatted photo sitting up right against my father old cigar box. Dropping the photos in my hands I reached out for the one in front of me that seemed like someone had handled the image a lot. The edges were curled and somewhat worn out, but when I brought the photo closer to the light I grasped softly when I saw who was in the photo.
There stood my father holding me upside down when I was little; my face was captured in childish laughed as my father looked down at me with a huge grin. I could barely remember the days when my father would take us all to Summerhaven Park. The image captured a pure love filled moment with father and daughter caught in a moment of play. I flipped the image over to find writing on the back; the inscription made tears sting in the back of my eyes when I read aloud.
“My baby girl.”
I ran my fingers over the image of us together and happy, finding myself yearning for that father I used to play with. Dad looked so young and full of life, something I always saw in Grandma Claudia.
“God what happened to you?” I questioned into the darkness and was suddenly startled but my mother screaming my name again.
“Coming!” I screamed while placing the photo back in place then darting out of the study and leaving the door a fraction open like it was before. Adrenaline rushed cursing through my veins and quickening my breath.
I casually walked into the kitchen taking my seat at the table as Mom busied herself in the kitchen humming under her breath, something she hadn’t done for a while. She seemed almost relieved like a plague had lifted from her shoulders but there was something off putting about it.
Picking at the lukewarm pancakes before me, I suddenly lost my appetite. Because of my recent little endeavor, I had an incredible urge to run back to the study and look through the treasures that might explain the turning point in my family's life, where one minute I’m the baby girl and the next the unwanted child. Rosa always got praised as the favorite but I never really got the full impact until I was about eight or nine.
And maybe even my father had the suicide note tucked away in his little hide away room. I needed to dig through that room, it itched at my like a hot rash. I had to find out more. My eyes wandered back to the direction of the study and thoughts tumbled over and over in my mind as to what my parents were hiding.
“So where’s Dad?” I asked casually like I have been doing for the past week. My mother walked back to the table with a glass of milk in her hand, she avoided my stare and placed the glass in front of me.
“I don’t know, he didn’t come home last night and I don’t think he’ll be home tonight.” Mom said as she turned back to the kitchen.
That’s all I need to know, I could come back during lunch at school and look through room again for that note, or I could do it tonight when Max comes over, he could help me and stand guard.
I just need to make sure I mom isn’t around.
“Oh I’m doing the shopping tonight for the Café; I have to drive out to Santa Fe to get these particular ingredients requested by Eddy.” Mom chimed in from behind the counter.
“Okay, I’ll lock up tonight.”
And the plan was set; tonight I would find that note and finding out what really happened in my family.
***********************************
“So Michael actually thought having a date at the bowling alley would be a great place for our anniversary.” Maria fumed while throwing her hands up in the air in disgust followed by a grunt of annoyance.
“C’mon Maria he's trying.” I laughed as Maria and I walked through the hallways of our school.
“Liz, trying hard is a picnic under the stars or a fancy restaurant, not having a tuna melt and six pin bowling!” Maria ranted again then placed a few drops of her herbal remedy under her tongue as I merely laughed at her antics. It felt good to laugh again.
“Why can’t we have something like you and Max have?” Maria whined as we reached her locker.
“A Relationship like Max and me, HA!” I burst out without any hesitation to stifle my sarcasm.
“Oh c’mon Liz, you have this whole depth thing, you know each other's heart.”
“Yeah and break them in the processes.” I finished blankly
“But you still fight for them, I mean thought all of this heartache you still find a civil ground. I thought what happened between Tess and Max would make you hate Max forever.” I cringed at having to hear the words ‘Tess and Max’ together, the words grouped together actually made my stomach turn.
“What is it?” Maria asked when she noticed me holding my stomach with closed eyes.
“Nothing, I’m just nauseous.” This earned me a small vial being thrust into my face, “What’s this?”
“It’s something I whipped up for you and that morning sickness of yours, just take a few sniffs and it’ll help settle you stomach.” Maria finished with a slam of her locker.
Just as we turned into the quick pace of busy students I took a sniff of Maria’s concoction and immediately ran into to none other then Tess Harding. The mixture spilt all over my front and some on Tess’. She stepped back with a shriek like a deadly poison covered her. I tried hard to repress the smile of revenge as I watched her wipe the front of her expensive blouse.
“You bitch!” She shrieked in a high pitched tone that could definitely shatter glass.
“Calm down, Tess I’m sure Daddy can buy you another one.” I said tartly, hearing Maria's snort of laughter behind me as I pushed past her, which made her stumble.
“Still pissed, Parker, that Max and I made love?” Tess bit out loudly which caused the entire hallway of bustling students to stop in their tracks; it was an official show down.
“Oh is that what you call rape, Tess?” I retorted cocking my head to one side and hearing the whispers of peers around me. I had nailed her.
“You think someone like me could actually do something so ludicrous, of course you’d believe any crap Max tells you.” Tess laughed in my face as she stepped closer.
“Did he forget to mention that he was the one who sought me out and threw me on the bed? Or was he trying to play the innocent victim?” Tess’ bitchy tone wasn’t what cut through me; it’s what she said that did. She was lying I knew she was, but why did I get that rush of panic.
“Like I’d believe what comes out of your trashy mouth.” I strained trying hard not to crumble.
“Believe what you wanna believe, Liz. Just remember that the truth hurts.” She said with a too evil glare as she walked away with an equally evil smirk.
“She’s just trying to get to you, Liz.” Maria said behind me but I barely heard her because I was clenching my stomach once again, willing it to stop turning and dripping at the horrible images of Max being with Tess.
“Liz? You okay?” Maria asked when she noticed me hunched over.
“I think I’m gonna be sick.” I rushed out then made a turn to run to the girls’ bathroom just as the bell rang for next class.
I emptied the contains of my stomach and after a few minutes of dry retching I had emerged from the cubicle, to see Maria sitting on the sink holding a paper towel out for me.
“Thanks.” I said quietly taking the paper and clearing my throat.
“So what just happened?” Maria asked while crossing her and folding her arms as I gave her the pretended ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about’ look.
“Morning sickness, Maria.” I said dumbly and in a hushed tone so no one would be able to hear.
“Before that,”
“I don’t know wh--”
“Don’t give me that crap Liz, I saw that look.”
“What look?” I stubbornly asked as I pulled my hair back into a loose bun.
“The look of someone who’s about to scream ‘bloody murder’ and go ‘Carrie’ on that bitch’s ass.” Maria finished as I hung my head gripping the edges of the sink finding myself in the same position, as I was that day when Max found me crying in the cubicle. I jolted up right to see Maria burning eyes.
“Like me not wanting to rip Tess’ throat out is anything new.” I retorted tartly
“It’s probably more then usual considering Max slept with her and--”
“Not willingly!” I shrieked out in weak defense.
“How do you know? How do you know for sure that he …isn’t lying or that he was too drunk to remember what he did do?” Her questions were making me furious; I didn’t want to think about this.
“I just know!” I shook my head frantically willing the doubt out “I mean he wouldn’t…. he just…. he just wouldn’t.” I wasn’t giving the best defense, maybe because I’ve harbored these doubts and convinced myself that he wasn’t lying.
“Liz, I’m only trying to help you and Max. I love you guys and you know I’d do anything to see you guys back to the way you were, but I just think this Tess thing could get worse and you should confront it head on with Max tonight.” Maria said tenderly as she jumped off the sink bench and came to stand next to me staring at my pale reflection.
“And I think we both know that you’ve harbored these kinda doubts way before them sleeping together.” All I could do was nod slowly at her truth and wisdom as I stared blankly at my ghostly reflection.
That bubbly, uplifting week of no tumult just came crashing down, how one moment things can seemed right on track and the next have it come off the rails, why had fate pushed me back into that dark corner of burdensome misery. I thought I was free of that place, but really I had just blocked it out hoping to carry on like it didn’t exist.
“Didn’t mean to rain on your parade, Liz it’s just I don’t want to see anymore curve balls hit your life especially when someone else is involved.”
“Who?” I looked at her dumbfounded when she suddenly poked my belly with a soft smile as I stared vacantly holding my stomach.
“I can’t believe your gonna be a Mommy, Lizzie.” Maria marveled in girlish delight, but all I could do was pretend I didn’t feel a swirl of dread make my stomach dip.
“Yeah.” I breathed out as a new fear heightened at my new realization
I was going to be a Mommy.
Okay kiddies, thanks you soooo much for ur patience so i got the next chapter as a treat
enjoy!
Chapter 24
“Liz, honey breakfast is ready.” I heard my mother speak over me as I shifted under my covers groaning at being disturbed from my slumber as she exited the room as quickly as she entered. But even when I still wanted to sleep I still couldn’t help but wake up to a beautiful, warm, sunny day. It had been like that for the past few days sunny, chipper days where my mom would wake me like she used when I was a kid and then make me a hearty breakfast.
I stretched my arms and legs and rubbed the sleep from eyes when I suddenly smelt blueberry pancakes on the morning air. Bolting from my bed I dashed to my bathroom and began my morning routine of brushing, showering and readying myself for the day. I hadn’t felt this alive in so long, I practical buzzed.
The reason why I felt this good was because things were finally going my way. Mom and I have developed this bond that I won’t change for the world, it’s not to say that we’re like Rory and Lorelei on the ‘Gilmore Girls’ but still it something more then what we had. It’s a normal mother daughter relationship something I’ve wanted for quiet some time.
Also I went for my doctor’s appointment the other day and everything seems fine according to Dr Morgan Jennings, my now official doctor. She’s a sweet person who’s handled many teen pregnancies, thanks to my mom for her connections. I now have a check once a month and then every week when it gets closer to the due date, which should be late August. It really freaked me out to go, like I was officially becoming a future mother but I promised Max and that’s all it took.
And of course there was my situation with Max, he has made it to my house every night ever since my birthday just to chat, whether it deep and meaningful or lighthearted. Because he covers it up by saying to his father that he’s going for his nightly jog we only talk for an hour or so, but I look forward to that hour everyday like a lifeline.
Max has revealed more and more about his brother and family issues then he ever did before, it’s like I’m truly seeing him. I found out that his Mom’s heavy depression was the cause of his father’s embittered ways; Max said that when his brother died, his parents died with him. Even through tears Max still opened his heart like he never did before, because he was always so afraid too.
I realized that his reasons for repressing his emotions towards his brother were taught to him from a very young age, he would recall to me his deepest and most painful memories of what happened after his brother's death. Like his mother being bedridden for over a year and not really speaking to Max and his father’s shutting down completely which made him work harder and spend less time at home.
Max even learnt from that early age to never speak his brother’s name again and he still doesn’t to this day. I only know his name was Jeremy because Alex had told me from the family connection between his parents and Max’s.
Max had showed me the part of his life he kept tucked away in the dark corners of his heart and it made me realize just how fortunate I was. Okay given that my family is a train wreck, my mother hiding something, avoiding my questions about my father or why our family became like this and my father’s being beyond sane I still had a happy childhood, my family was normal before it kinda hit a pin point and went down hill from there, before the whole Rosa thing.
For the first time in my life I could see what was going on, I wasn’t in the dark as much as I was before. I could see the pain in Max’s eyes and felt his loneliness when he huddled close to me the other night while we sat on my balcony wordlessly watching the stars. Even with the pain in my life, he endured much worse and I was so blinded by my pathetic complaints of having the worst life ever that I didn’t see that Max’s pain ran deeper than just a fight between him and his Dad.
And that’s what I plan to tell him tonight, that I should have recognized his pain and stop putting the spotlight on my issues. That I should have listened, and been a better girlfriend.
“Liz, c’mon your food's getting cold!” My mom yelled from the kitchen while I hurried around my room in a robe and towel on my head.
Through my favorite pair of jeans I stopped short when I sighted the even growing bump in my abdomen, even though Dr. Jennings said I had lost quite an amount of weight I was still showing.
I turned to my side and kept my face on the mirror as I ran one hand over the small bump in my tummy letting a small smile spread across my face that a small little person was now growing inside of me.
A smell of those blueberry pancakes my mom made for me and Rosa when we were little wafted in, and I threw on my T-shirt and dashed out my door to only be stopped in my tracks when I reached the middle of the hallway in front of my father's study.
What made me stop mid-dash for those mouth-watering pancakes was the fact that the door to the study was just opened a faction. This was odd because my father locked it every time, it was never unlocked.
My fingers itched to push the door open and see what my father had been doing in the room all this time, he basically lived in there.
With a quick look down the hall towards the kitchen I took a step forward and lightly placed one hand on the door. Pushing the door slightly it creaked sharply and loudly, I froze completely like I was going to be caught out any minute. After a few minutes I continued to open the door and stepped into the dark, musty room. The air hung heavy with dust and the swirling smells of alcohol; it was obvious that the study’s windows hadn’t been open in days.
I came fully into the room, noticing that my father wasn’t in it; his desk was littered with papers, photos, empty bottles and videotapes. Ashtrays, bottles and papers also littered the floor, while the small T.V and video recorder sat opposite his desk showing a snowing screen. It filled the room with flicking light and the humming of the fuzzy screen.
Walking over to the desk I picked up one of the tapes, the label read ‘Rosa and Liz playing’, I picked up another one ‘Rosa’s recital’ and another ‘Rosa’s first step’. I glanced at the littered surface of the desk, photos of Rosa, and some of me spread out everywhere.
I hadn’t seen these photos in years; I didn’t even know where they all went too. I remember one day a couple of months after Rosa’s death I couldn’t find a single album that had Rosa in it. Come to think of it, all photo of Rosa that were on the mantle piece and on coffee tables had gone straight after her death, excepted for the school photo of her in my parent’s bedroom along with mine. It’s like they had all disappeared and now here they were all in front of me.
I circled around the desk and sat in the recliner chair that now had my father's imprint in it. I picked up a few photos and marveled at how much I had forgotten what she looked like. The resemblance between us was uncanny, the only difference was that I had dark brown eyes and Rosa had crystal blue eyes like Dad’s.
I flicked through another batch of photos and stopped when I saw Rosa looking about five and me as a baby in her lap. I gave the camera a toothless grin as Rosa hugged me tight also giving a big cheeky grin.
I suddenly notice out the corner of my eye as that there was a tatted photo sitting up right against my father old cigar box. Dropping the photos in my hands I reached out for the one in front of me that seemed like someone had handled the image a lot. The edges were curled and somewhat worn out, but when I brought the photo closer to the light I grasped softly when I saw who was in the photo.
There stood my father holding me upside down when I was little; my face was captured in childish laughed as my father looked down at me with a huge grin. I could barely remember the days when my father would take us all to Summerhaven Park. The image captured a pure love filled moment with father and daughter caught in a moment of play. I flipped the image over to find writing on the back; the inscription made tears sting in the back of my eyes when I read aloud.
“My baby girl.”
I ran my fingers over the image of us together and happy, finding myself yearning for that father I used to play with. Dad looked so young and full of life, something I always saw in Grandma Claudia.
“God what happened to you?” I questioned into the darkness and was suddenly startled but my mother screaming my name again.
“Coming!” I screamed while placing the photo back in place then darting out of the study and leaving the door a fraction open like it was before. Adrenaline rushed cursing through my veins and quickening my breath.
I casually walked into the kitchen taking my seat at the table as Mom busied herself in the kitchen humming under her breath, something she hadn’t done for a while. She seemed almost relieved like a plague had lifted from her shoulders but there was something off putting about it.
Picking at the lukewarm pancakes before me, I suddenly lost my appetite. Because of my recent little endeavor, I had an incredible urge to run back to the study and look through the treasures that might explain the turning point in my family's life, where one minute I’m the baby girl and the next the unwanted child. Rosa always got praised as the favorite but I never really got the full impact until I was about eight or nine.
And maybe even my father had the suicide note tucked away in his little hide away room. I needed to dig through that room, it itched at my like a hot rash. I had to find out more. My eyes wandered back to the direction of the study and thoughts tumbled over and over in my mind as to what my parents were hiding.
“So where’s Dad?” I asked casually like I have been doing for the past week. My mother walked back to the table with a glass of milk in her hand, she avoided my stare and placed the glass in front of me.
“I don’t know, he didn’t come home last night and I don’t think he’ll be home tonight.” Mom said as she turned back to the kitchen.
That’s all I need to know, I could come back during lunch at school and look through room again for that note, or I could do it tonight when Max comes over, he could help me and stand guard.
I just need to make sure I mom isn’t around.
“Oh I’m doing the shopping tonight for the Café; I have to drive out to Santa Fe to get these particular ingredients requested by Eddy.” Mom chimed in from behind the counter.
“Okay, I’ll lock up tonight.”
And the plan was set; tonight I would find that note and finding out what really happened in my family.
***********************************
“So Michael actually thought having a date at the bowling alley would be a great place for our anniversary.” Maria fumed while throwing her hands up in the air in disgust followed by a grunt of annoyance.
“C’mon Maria he's trying.” I laughed as Maria and I walked through the hallways of our school.
“Liz, trying hard is a picnic under the stars or a fancy restaurant, not having a tuna melt and six pin bowling!” Maria ranted again then placed a few drops of her herbal remedy under her tongue as I merely laughed at her antics. It felt good to laugh again.
“Why can’t we have something like you and Max have?” Maria whined as we reached her locker.
“A Relationship like Max and me, HA!” I burst out without any hesitation to stifle my sarcasm.
“Oh c’mon Liz, you have this whole depth thing, you know each other's heart.”
“Yeah and break them in the processes.” I finished blankly
“But you still fight for them, I mean thought all of this heartache you still find a civil ground. I thought what happened between Tess and Max would make you hate Max forever.” I cringed at having to hear the words ‘Tess and Max’ together, the words grouped together actually made my stomach turn.
“What is it?” Maria asked when she noticed me holding my stomach with closed eyes.
“Nothing, I’m just nauseous.” This earned me a small vial being thrust into my face, “What’s this?”
“It’s something I whipped up for you and that morning sickness of yours, just take a few sniffs and it’ll help settle you stomach.” Maria finished with a slam of her locker.
Just as we turned into the quick pace of busy students I took a sniff of Maria’s concoction and immediately ran into to none other then Tess Harding. The mixture spilt all over my front and some on Tess’. She stepped back with a shriek like a deadly poison covered her. I tried hard to repress the smile of revenge as I watched her wipe the front of her expensive blouse.
“You bitch!” She shrieked in a high pitched tone that could definitely shatter glass.
“Calm down, Tess I’m sure Daddy can buy you another one.” I said tartly, hearing Maria's snort of laughter behind me as I pushed past her, which made her stumble.
“Still pissed, Parker, that Max and I made love?” Tess bit out loudly which caused the entire hallway of bustling students to stop in their tracks; it was an official show down.
“Oh is that what you call rape, Tess?” I retorted cocking my head to one side and hearing the whispers of peers around me. I had nailed her.
“You think someone like me could actually do something so ludicrous, of course you’d believe any crap Max tells you.” Tess laughed in my face as she stepped closer.
“Did he forget to mention that he was the one who sought me out and threw me on the bed? Or was he trying to play the innocent victim?” Tess’ bitchy tone wasn’t what cut through me; it’s what she said that did. She was lying I knew she was, but why did I get that rush of panic.
“Like I’d believe what comes out of your trashy mouth.” I strained trying hard not to crumble.
“Believe what you wanna believe, Liz. Just remember that the truth hurts.” She said with a too evil glare as she walked away with an equally evil smirk.
“She’s just trying to get to you, Liz.” Maria said behind me but I barely heard her because I was clenching my stomach once again, willing it to stop turning and dripping at the horrible images of Max being with Tess.
“Liz? You okay?” Maria asked when she noticed me hunched over.
“I think I’m gonna be sick.” I rushed out then made a turn to run to the girls’ bathroom just as the bell rang for next class.
I emptied the contains of my stomach and after a few minutes of dry retching I had emerged from the cubicle, to see Maria sitting on the sink holding a paper towel out for me.
“Thanks.” I said quietly taking the paper and clearing my throat.
“So what just happened?” Maria asked while crossing her and folding her arms as I gave her the pretended ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about’ look.
“Morning sickness, Maria.” I said dumbly and in a hushed tone so no one would be able to hear.
“Before that,”
“I don’t know wh--”
“Don’t give me that crap Liz, I saw that look.”
“What look?” I stubbornly asked as I pulled my hair back into a loose bun.
“The look of someone who’s about to scream ‘bloody murder’ and go ‘Carrie’ on that bitch’s ass.” Maria finished as I hung my head gripping the edges of the sink finding myself in the same position, as I was that day when Max found me crying in the cubicle. I jolted up right to see Maria burning eyes.
“Like me not wanting to rip Tess’ throat out is anything new.” I retorted tartly
“It’s probably more then usual considering Max slept with her and--”
“Not willingly!” I shrieked out in weak defense.
“How do you know? How do you know for sure that he …isn’t lying or that he was too drunk to remember what he did do?” Her questions were making me furious; I didn’t want to think about this.
“I just know!” I shook my head frantically willing the doubt out “I mean he wouldn’t…. he just…. he just wouldn’t.” I wasn’t giving the best defense, maybe because I’ve harbored these doubts and convinced myself that he wasn’t lying.
“Liz, I’m only trying to help you and Max. I love you guys and you know I’d do anything to see you guys back to the way you were, but I just think this Tess thing could get worse and you should confront it head on with Max tonight.” Maria said tenderly as she jumped off the sink bench and came to stand next to me staring at my pale reflection.
“And I think we both know that you’ve harbored these kinda doubts way before them sleeping together.” All I could do was nod slowly at her truth and wisdom as I stared blankly at my ghostly reflection.
That bubbly, uplifting week of no tumult just came crashing down, how one moment things can seemed right on track and the next have it come off the rails, why had fate pushed me back into that dark corner of burdensome misery. I thought I was free of that place, but really I had just blocked it out hoping to carry on like it didn’t exist.
“Didn’t mean to rain on your parade, Liz it’s just I don’t want to see anymore curve balls hit your life especially when someone else is involved.”
“Who?” I looked at her dumbfounded when she suddenly poked my belly with a soft smile as I stared vacantly holding my stomach.
“I can’t believe your gonna be a Mommy, Lizzie.” Maria marveled in girlish delight, but all I could do was pretend I didn’t feel a swirl of dread make my stomach dip.
“Yeah.” I breathed out as a new fear heightened at my new realization
I was going to be a Mommy.
-
Hybrid-Angel
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 57
- Joined: Tue Dec 31, 2002 5:32 pm
- Location: A room with padded walls
Guyz i'm sooooo sorry for this delay, i've had performances and uni assessments due and god i'm glad it's over course now i can post this. enjoy!
Mar-garita - thanks bella.
Chapter 25
“Hey.”
Max’s sudden entry from the iron ladder made me jump as I sat in deep thought on my deck chair wrapped in a blanket. Max softly smiled as he made his way over to sit next to me. I could feel those golden eyes drink me in and the warmth of his presence rub against me as I placed the blanket around him also. He only wore some jogging gear that was thin and was soaked by his sweat around his chest and back.
“Have a nice jog?” I noticed also that he was panting just a little bit and perspiring from his temples making his hair look slicked back a bit.
“I thought if I ran here we’d have more time, plus then I’d actually smell like I did go for a jog.” Max softly smiled as I let out a small chuckle.
“What’s on your mind? You looked a little lost in thought.” Max queried as I brought my knees to my chest.
“Umm, nothing it’s just something Maria said today that kinda freaked me out.”
“What did she say?” Max asked attentively when he noticed I was rocking back and forth while biting my nails.
“Umm,” I swallowed hard “That I was going to be a mommy.” I said in a shaky tone, while my eyes vacantly scanned the surface of my balcony floor as if all answer lay before me but was in an ancient language.
“Yeah, you are.” His answer didn’t calm me much, in fact I sprang from my seat in panic. I didn’t know what had come over me lately.
“I don’t know why I’m panicking so much right now, I mean….ever since that night I found you drunk at Summerhaven park I had already came to the conclusion that I wanted this baby a-and I don’t why but I’m just…it’s just… I’m--”
“Freaking out.” He finished for me as I nodded my head quickly slightly hyperventilating.
“Before it didn’t seem real until I went to see Dr. Jennings, and having this bump in my stomach a-and…I-I guess Maria just tipped it off by saying that today,” I finished completely oblivious to the tears running down my cheeks as I shifted my weight from one foot to the other, “I’m scared.” I breathed finally as Max came to stand in front of me and wrap me in his big arms. I cuddled close enjoying his chest and feeling his embrace calm me down.
“It’s okay to be scared, Liz. No one expects you to be tough, you’re going through a lot and everything is changing in our lives. It scares me too.” Max calmly whispered into my hair as he slowly rubbed the length of my back and slightly swayed as if nursing me to sleep.
“What if I’m not a good mother?” I asked into his chest, nuzzling my head deeper into his chest as I felt him smile into my hair.
“Are you kidding me?” He pulled away to look down into my teary eyes, “Who was the best at playing ‘House’ when we were kids?” I chuckled softly at his droll remark and then looked up to his earnest features.
“Liz you’re the most loving, caring and nurturing person I know. And I know that you’ll be the best mom this kid ever had.” Max finished with a sweet smile before tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.
“How did you do that?” I smiled up to his puzzled faced, “How do you make me feel like I don’t have a worry in the world?”
“One of my many Gifts.” He sighed humorously as my smile almost reached my still glistening eyes, it felt so right being in his arms, having him look down on me and hold me. It’s like our souls meld together and makes me feel…. whole.
“There’s that smile.” Max’s deep voice hummed in my ears as our foreheads inched closer, until our hot breaths mingled. I let my eyes linger down to his lips and before I knew it Max pulled away slightly breaking the moment.
“Liz, we can’t….” Max whispered while still holding me in his arms. I felt that pain of rejection swirl through me as I began to pull away from his arms. “Liz …,” But Max won’t let go, “It’s not because I don’t want too, believe me, it’s just our friendship is just starting over…. and I don’t want to ruin anything more in my life or yours.” Max’s pleading eyes searched my face frantically for understanding.
“You're right, I don’t want rush back into it without confronting everything we feel.” I took a small tentative step back, Max’s arms still loosely holding me.
“Which brings me to something else Maria and I talked about today.” I took a deep breath to build the courage I was lacking at the moment.
“Should I sit down?” Max asked, worried as he noticed the various emotions play over my face.
“What happened the night you slept with her?” I barely heard him speak as I rushed my words out, biting my trembling lip as I watched him avert his gaze and take a step back to sit down.
“I told you, I don’t remember much.”
“Exactly, which means maybe you forgot that you wanted to sleep with her or that you're lying.” My voice shook as I whispered the last words because I saw how much my accusing him of lying hurt. The hurt flicked in his eyes.
“You think I’m lying to you?” Max questioned painfully “God, I really have destroyed the faith you have in me.” He uttered quietly under his breath, his sorrow-filled gaze transfixing on the floor.
“Did Tess say something to you?” He looked up to me with brows knitted in confusion, I couldn’t suppress the ever-growing panic in my eyes and voice so I just shook my head quickly.
“No, not really. I just bumped into her in today and she just was trying to get on my nerves saying that you sought her out that night.” My words drifted off at the end when I saw Max drop his head and drag his hands down his face.
“At that party she made it her business to tell everyone that you broke up with me and she was also making up these rumors about you which I over heard from Vicki Delaney. So I asked around where she was, to go and tell her to fuck off and leave you alone…. But I couldn’t find her and that’s when I went to drink some of Mr. Harding’s alcohol.”
“And then she found you.” I finished off still standing in front of him shifting my weight and trying to get a grip as he nodded to me.
“You believe me, right?” Max stood slowly as he asked then looked down into my glistening eyes, his earnest features and painful glare made my tears fall once more, I believed him, I wanted to believe him more then anything, but something pulled me back because my heart needed protection.
All I could do was giving him a simple shrug. “A part of me believes you, because I know you wouldn’t lie about this, I know that you’re not lying. But what if a couple of days from now you remember more of that night…you remember that it wasn’t a case of being taken advantage of.” I sobbed out the last part with my heart on my sleeve.
Max gently took my hand and brought me to sit back down with him on the deck chair, I looked everywhere else but his face trying to hide the waterfall of tears that cascaded down my face and collected in the corners of my mouth.
“What your saying could be true, Liz. I’ve feared the same thing and I wouldn’t want to hurt you like that again.” It pained him so much to see me cry that I could hear it in his velvet voice; it began to quiver with bubbling emotion.
“But I remember having this sickening, panicked feeling that I had to get out of the room that entire time before I passed out.” Max then placed his fingers on my chin and lightly turned my head to see his face. “I also remember screaming at Tess to get off me, but something was pinning me down, in my heart I know I didn’t want to sleep with her and I feel sick thinking about it.”
Max was now silently crying himself, desperately trying to make me understand. Bringing my hands to his face I brushed away the tears from his stubbly cheek and settled back to lie down on my deck chair, drawing him with me. I didn’t know what to think anymore, Max’s night with that money-hungry whore is like a puzzle piece that seemed impossible to understand. I felt in my heart that Max really hated what happened and the he believed he was taken advantage of, but I just couldn’t give in to it that easily. My mind screamed for answers, maybe because I know that if I were in his situation I would have done the same thing. I had never seen Max like that before, broken and remorseful.
Max nuzzled into my neck and placed a feather soft kiss there then laid his head contentedly on my chest. We stayed like that for a few moments hugging each other while trapped in thoughts that we couldn’t escape from. It was heartbreaking and utterly baffling all at once. While we both wanted to heal, we both had this wall of protection in front of us that we seemed to be scared to break. And why wouldn’t we be scared - aside from the mistakes and misunderstandings the bottom line was we broke each other's heart more than beyond repair at same stages.
For our entire lives of being together or involved we never really went beyond some fight that lead to us hurting each other so badly. We were carefree and happy with each other, sorting through the minor crap easily with a kiss and make-up. But now a simple ‘I love you’ and a kiss doesn’t fix everything.
I suddenly felt Max lift his head after a another few more moments of bittersweet silence as he had noticed the pocket knife I had sitting on the table of candles, he reached over and picked it up then looked up to me in perplexity.
“Planning on joining cub scouts?” He asked raising one eyebrow.
I braced myself on my elbows and took the pocketknife out of his grasp. “No, just planning on breaking ‘n’ entering.” And that suddenly lightened the mood. To add to it I gave a droll half smile.
“Huh?”
“This morning I found my father's study open, so I snuck in and found all this stuff in there. Like photos of Rosa and I think some documents. I thought maybe Rosa’s suicide note could be in there.”
“And you want me to be you partner in crime.” Max stated more then asked.
“That’s right. You said you help me.” I pointed out as Max gave a groan of worry.
“Pleeease.” I whined, then gave him the big old puppy dog eyes “I need you to stand watch.”
“Okay.” Max sighed, “But I think this is a bad idea. What if we get caught?”
“We won’t. My mom’s picking up ingredients for the Café and Dad’s…well I don’t know, Mom said he won’t be here tonight. So we're covered for a good three hours.” I said to him like it was the perfect crime, but it still didn’t wipe the worry off his face.
“Okay, let’s get it over with.” Max huffed as we both stood and made our way through my window and down the hall to my fathers study.
“You do realize that the pocket knife thing only works in the movies.” Max said from behind me as we came to a halt in front of the study door.
“Well what else do you propose we do?” I asked sarcastically as I fiddled to open the pocketknife.
“The door knob.” Max said plainly as he reached from behind me and twisted the doorknob and let it open with a soft click.
I looked from the open door and then followed Max's arm up to his face to see him grinning mockingly.
“Smart-ass.” I accused under my breath as we both started to make our way into the study. It still smelt stale and dusty. It was dank and I found it had to believe my dad spent almost everyday in here. Max circled around me and headed for the desk, and switched on the table lap.
The light gave away the full detail of the state the room with in; I could see in every corner and shelf a littered display of papers, liquor bottles, food cartons and photos. The room was a complete disaster; it’s like the room that threw up on itself.
“Look at this.” I heard Max call from my father's chair as he held up that photo I had picked up earlier this morning of me and my father playing at the park.
“It says ‘My baby girl’ on the back.” Max said to me but I could barely hear him as I sighted a tape poking out of the VCR under the TV
“Yeah I saw it this morning.” I mumbled as I knelt in front of the TV and pushed the tape labeled ‘Rosa and Liz’ back into the VCR.
The screen flickered blue then focused on a playground where Rosa and I ran across the screen. The camera followed and focused again on my Dad who was holding out his arms to Rosa and me. A swirl of childish giggles filled the room as I watch my sister and I jump into our father’s arms and then tumble to the ground tackling him.
Rosa then stood up and ran towards the camera coming as close to the lens as she could.
“Hi Mommy.” Rosa said as she looked into the camera.
“Hey sweetie, what’s Daddy doing?” My Mom chuckled sweetly from behind the camera.
“Being silly.” Rosa giggled, as she looked back towards me and my Dad. The camera followed Rosa's direction and focused on my father spinning around while holding me by my hands. The room filled with my swirls of delighted childish giggles as my father spun me more then plopped me on the ground and watched me try and get my balance before falling down.
The screen then cut to a nine year old Rosa standing in front of the camera in a pink tutu, bashfully pulling at her tutu and sticking her fingers in her mouth.
“Do a little turn for us, honey.” My dad encouraged from behind the camera.
“Okay.” Rosa brightly smiled then placed her hands in the air and did a graceful turn finishing with a curtsy. Surprisingly very well done for a nine year old, but then again Rosa always excelled at everything and I had to live up to those standards.
“C’mon Lizzie.” Rosa waved her hand encouragingly then walked off the screen to retrieve a five-year-old me. I stood in a large white coat and a flower hat that fell over my eyes, obviously playing dress ups with our Grandma Claudia. I gave a small laugh as I watched Rosa and myself explain to dad that Rosa was a famous Ballerina and I was a rich lady from the audience with her husband Teddy.
“Daddy can be a audience person too!” I squealed in excitement while tripping and falling over my clothes in an attempt to walk to my father who then lifted me into his lap with soft chuckles.
“Are you wearing Mommy’s Lipstick?” My dad asked me mockingly trying hard not to laugh as I looked up into the camera shaking my head quickly followed by a loud ‘No’. I was obviously lying because my mouth was covered in bright red lipstick.
“Oh Jeffrey, leave her alone she looks beautiful in it.” The camera swung around to the voice of my beloved Grandma Claudia who now hovered above my father and snatched the camera from his hands.
“Grandma.” I whispered out placing fingers on my grandma’s glowing face, never noticing that Max had been crouched beside me this whole time.
The camera then swung away from my Grandma Claudia’s face and back to see me sitting on my Dad lap and him smiling up to the camera holding me close.
“Mom ya gotta stop dressing my girls up in lipstick, pretty soon they’ll have boys chasing them!” My dad said followed by me squealing a loud ‘Eww’.
“Aww boys aren’t that bad.” My father chuckled to me as I scrunched up my nose in disgust.
“Yes they are!” I squealed once again.
“But I’m a boy!” My Dad playfully challenged as I held his face between my child-size hands laughing as he repeated his words and lifted me above his head.
“But you’re my Daddy and I love you.” I childishly squealed in delight still held above his head.
“How much do you love me?” Dad asked while bringing my face closer to his.
“Dis much!” I exclaimed holding my arms out like an airplane.
“That much?” My dad gasped as he looked at me with wide eyes then quickly put me back in his lap and give me kisses all over my face as I laughed in girlish happiness. He finally finished then held me close to his face once again, his nose touching mine, “I love you too, Butterbean.”
The moment was short but pure, a sweet moment between daddy and daughter. It was hard to believe this ever happened to me. It was like someone else's life.
Rosa then jumped into the scene landing on Dad’s back and climbing on him. My dad let out a mocking scream as Rosa and I tumbled around with him on the couch, giggling as we poked and tickled him.
“Mother, Help me! It’s the tickle monsters! Save me!” He bellowed out over our bursting laughter.
“I’m coming my son!” Grandma Claudia bellowed back mockingly. Then the screen went blank.
I could feel Max place one hand on my back tenderly as I vacantly watched the snowy screen before me.
“I’ve never seen that before.” I whispered as the tape rewound and popped back out.
“What about all these other tapes?” Max gestured towards the scattered floor of tapes. I shook my head slowly in response.
“It’s so weird, it’s like I’m looking into someone else’s life. God, Rosa looks so different to what I remember.”
“So does your Dad. You okay?” Max added as he watched me nodded slowly never once removing my eyes from the screen.
“Liz, I found this.” Max said finally, holding up a file folder marked ‘Evidence’. Max placed it in front of me and I finally looked away from the screen.
I gulped once as I stared down at the file laying on my lap. This could hold the very last note that Rosa wrote, the very last thoughts that went through her mind while she was still breathing.
“Liz, are you going to open it?” Max asked softly as I sat closer to him. I jerked my head in what I thought was a nod and ran my fingers over the edge of the file. I held my breath as I flipped the file open.
“Oh my God.”
TBC
Mar-garita -
thanks bella.Chapter 25
“Hey.”
Max’s sudden entry from the iron ladder made me jump as I sat in deep thought on my deck chair wrapped in a blanket. Max softly smiled as he made his way over to sit next to me. I could feel those golden eyes drink me in and the warmth of his presence rub against me as I placed the blanket around him also. He only wore some jogging gear that was thin and was soaked by his sweat around his chest and back.
“Have a nice jog?” I noticed also that he was panting just a little bit and perspiring from his temples making his hair look slicked back a bit.
“I thought if I ran here we’d have more time, plus then I’d actually smell like I did go for a jog.” Max softly smiled as I let out a small chuckle.
“What’s on your mind? You looked a little lost in thought.” Max queried as I brought my knees to my chest.
“Umm, nothing it’s just something Maria said today that kinda freaked me out.”
“What did she say?” Max asked attentively when he noticed I was rocking back and forth while biting my nails.
“Umm,” I swallowed hard “That I was going to be a mommy.” I said in a shaky tone, while my eyes vacantly scanned the surface of my balcony floor as if all answer lay before me but was in an ancient language.
“Yeah, you are.” His answer didn’t calm me much, in fact I sprang from my seat in panic. I didn’t know what had come over me lately.
“I don’t know why I’m panicking so much right now, I mean….ever since that night I found you drunk at Summerhaven park I had already came to the conclusion that I wanted this baby a-and I don’t why but I’m just…it’s just… I’m--”
“Freaking out.” He finished for me as I nodded my head quickly slightly hyperventilating.
“Before it didn’t seem real until I went to see Dr. Jennings, and having this bump in my stomach a-and…I-I guess Maria just tipped it off by saying that today,” I finished completely oblivious to the tears running down my cheeks as I shifted my weight from one foot to the other, “I’m scared.” I breathed finally as Max came to stand in front of me and wrap me in his big arms. I cuddled close enjoying his chest and feeling his embrace calm me down.
“It’s okay to be scared, Liz. No one expects you to be tough, you’re going through a lot and everything is changing in our lives. It scares me too.” Max calmly whispered into my hair as he slowly rubbed the length of my back and slightly swayed as if nursing me to sleep.
“What if I’m not a good mother?” I asked into his chest, nuzzling my head deeper into his chest as I felt him smile into my hair.
“Are you kidding me?” He pulled away to look down into my teary eyes, “Who was the best at playing ‘House’ when we were kids?” I chuckled softly at his droll remark and then looked up to his earnest features.
“Liz you’re the most loving, caring and nurturing person I know. And I know that you’ll be the best mom this kid ever had.” Max finished with a sweet smile before tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.
“How did you do that?” I smiled up to his puzzled faced, “How do you make me feel like I don’t have a worry in the world?”
“One of my many Gifts.” He sighed humorously as my smile almost reached my still glistening eyes, it felt so right being in his arms, having him look down on me and hold me. It’s like our souls meld together and makes me feel…. whole.
“There’s that smile.” Max’s deep voice hummed in my ears as our foreheads inched closer, until our hot breaths mingled. I let my eyes linger down to his lips and before I knew it Max pulled away slightly breaking the moment.
“Liz, we can’t….” Max whispered while still holding me in his arms. I felt that pain of rejection swirl through me as I began to pull away from his arms. “Liz …,” But Max won’t let go, “It’s not because I don’t want too, believe me, it’s just our friendship is just starting over…. and I don’t want to ruin anything more in my life or yours.” Max’s pleading eyes searched my face frantically for understanding.
“You're right, I don’t want rush back into it without confronting everything we feel.” I took a small tentative step back, Max’s arms still loosely holding me.
“Which brings me to something else Maria and I talked about today.” I took a deep breath to build the courage I was lacking at the moment.
“Should I sit down?” Max asked, worried as he noticed the various emotions play over my face.
“What happened the night you slept with her?” I barely heard him speak as I rushed my words out, biting my trembling lip as I watched him avert his gaze and take a step back to sit down.
“I told you, I don’t remember much.”
“Exactly, which means maybe you forgot that you wanted to sleep with her or that you're lying.” My voice shook as I whispered the last words because I saw how much my accusing him of lying hurt. The hurt flicked in his eyes.
“You think I’m lying to you?” Max questioned painfully “God, I really have destroyed the faith you have in me.” He uttered quietly under his breath, his sorrow-filled gaze transfixing on the floor.
“Did Tess say something to you?” He looked up to me with brows knitted in confusion, I couldn’t suppress the ever-growing panic in my eyes and voice so I just shook my head quickly.
“No, not really. I just bumped into her in today and she just was trying to get on my nerves saying that you sought her out that night.” My words drifted off at the end when I saw Max drop his head and drag his hands down his face.
“At that party she made it her business to tell everyone that you broke up with me and she was also making up these rumors about you which I over heard from Vicki Delaney. So I asked around where she was, to go and tell her to fuck off and leave you alone…. But I couldn’t find her and that’s when I went to drink some of Mr. Harding’s alcohol.”
“And then she found you.” I finished off still standing in front of him shifting my weight and trying to get a grip as he nodded to me.
“You believe me, right?” Max stood slowly as he asked then looked down into my glistening eyes, his earnest features and painful glare made my tears fall once more, I believed him, I wanted to believe him more then anything, but something pulled me back because my heart needed protection.
All I could do was giving him a simple shrug. “A part of me believes you, because I know you wouldn’t lie about this, I know that you’re not lying. But what if a couple of days from now you remember more of that night…you remember that it wasn’t a case of being taken advantage of.” I sobbed out the last part with my heart on my sleeve.
Max gently took my hand and brought me to sit back down with him on the deck chair, I looked everywhere else but his face trying to hide the waterfall of tears that cascaded down my face and collected in the corners of my mouth.
“What your saying could be true, Liz. I’ve feared the same thing and I wouldn’t want to hurt you like that again.” It pained him so much to see me cry that I could hear it in his velvet voice; it began to quiver with bubbling emotion.
“But I remember having this sickening, panicked feeling that I had to get out of the room that entire time before I passed out.” Max then placed his fingers on my chin and lightly turned my head to see his face. “I also remember screaming at Tess to get off me, but something was pinning me down, in my heart I know I didn’t want to sleep with her and I feel sick thinking about it.”
Max was now silently crying himself, desperately trying to make me understand. Bringing my hands to his face I brushed away the tears from his stubbly cheek and settled back to lie down on my deck chair, drawing him with me. I didn’t know what to think anymore, Max’s night with that money-hungry whore is like a puzzle piece that seemed impossible to understand. I felt in my heart that Max really hated what happened and the he believed he was taken advantage of, but I just couldn’t give in to it that easily. My mind screamed for answers, maybe because I know that if I were in his situation I would have done the same thing. I had never seen Max like that before, broken and remorseful.
Max nuzzled into my neck and placed a feather soft kiss there then laid his head contentedly on my chest. We stayed like that for a few moments hugging each other while trapped in thoughts that we couldn’t escape from. It was heartbreaking and utterly baffling all at once. While we both wanted to heal, we both had this wall of protection in front of us that we seemed to be scared to break. And why wouldn’t we be scared - aside from the mistakes and misunderstandings the bottom line was we broke each other's heart more than beyond repair at same stages.
For our entire lives of being together or involved we never really went beyond some fight that lead to us hurting each other so badly. We were carefree and happy with each other, sorting through the minor crap easily with a kiss and make-up. But now a simple ‘I love you’ and a kiss doesn’t fix everything.
I suddenly felt Max lift his head after a another few more moments of bittersweet silence as he had noticed the pocket knife I had sitting on the table of candles, he reached over and picked it up then looked up to me in perplexity.
“Planning on joining cub scouts?” He asked raising one eyebrow.
I braced myself on my elbows and took the pocketknife out of his grasp. “No, just planning on breaking ‘n’ entering.” And that suddenly lightened the mood. To add to it I gave a droll half smile.
“Huh?”
“This morning I found my father's study open, so I snuck in and found all this stuff in there. Like photos of Rosa and I think some documents. I thought maybe Rosa’s suicide note could be in there.”
“And you want me to be you partner in crime.” Max stated more then asked.
“That’s right. You said you help me.” I pointed out as Max gave a groan of worry.
“Pleeease.” I whined, then gave him the big old puppy dog eyes “I need you to stand watch.”
“Okay.” Max sighed, “But I think this is a bad idea. What if we get caught?”
“We won’t. My mom’s picking up ingredients for the Café and Dad’s…well I don’t know, Mom said he won’t be here tonight. So we're covered for a good three hours.” I said to him like it was the perfect crime, but it still didn’t wipe the worry off his face.
“Okay, let’s get it over with.” Max huffed as we both stood and made our way through my window and down the hall to my fathers study.
“You do realize that the pocket knife thing only works in the movies.” Max said from behind me as we came to a halt in front of the study door.
“Well what else do you propose we do?” I asked sarcastically as I fiddled to open the pocketknife.
“The door knob.” Max said plainly as he reached from behind me and twisted the doorknob and let it open with a soft click.
I looked from the open door and then followed Max's arm up to his face to see him grinning mockingly.
“Smart-ass.” I accused under my breath as we both started to make our way into the study. It still smelt stale and dusty. It was dank and I found it had to believe my dad spent almost everyday in here. Max circled around me and headed for the desk, and switched on the table lap.
The light gave away the full detail of the state the room with in; I could see in every corner and shelf a littered display of papers, liquor bottles, food cartons and photos. The room was a complete disaster; it’s like the room that threw up on itself.
“Look at this.” I heard Max call from my father's chair as he held up that photo I had picked up earlier this morning of me and my father playing at the park.
“It says ‘My baby girl’ on the back.” Max said to me but I could barely hear him as I sighted a tape poking out of the VCR under the TV
“Yeah I saw it this morning.” I mumbled as I knelt in front of the TV and pushed the tape labeled ‘Rosa and Liz’ back into the VCR.
The screen flickered blue then focused on a playground where Rosa and I ran across the screen. The camera followed and focused again on my Dad who was holding out his arms to Rosa and me. A swirl of childish giggles filled the room as I watch my sister and I jump into our father’s arms and then tumble to the ground tackling him.
Rosa then stood up and ran towards the camera coming as close to the lens as she could.
“Hi Mommy.” Rosa said as she looked into the camera.
“Hey sweetie, what’s Daddy doing?” My Mom chuckled sweetly from behind the camera.
“Being silly.” Rosa giggled, as she looked back towards me and my Dad. The camera followed Rosa's direction and focused on my father spinning around while holding me by my hands. The room filled with my swirls of delighted childish giggles as my father spun me more then plopped me on the ground and watched me try and get my balance before falling down.
The screen then cut to a nine year old Rosa standing in front of the camera in a pink tutu, bashfully pulling at her tutu and sticking her fingers in her mouth.
“Do a little turn for us, honey.” My dad encouraged from behind the camera.
“Okay.” Rosa brightly smiled then placed her hands in the air and did a graceful turn finishing with a curtsy. Surprisingly very well done for a nine year old, but then again Rosa always excelled at everything and I had to live up to those standards.
“C’mon Lizzie.” Rosa waved her hand encouragingly then walked off the screen to retrieve a five-year-old me. I stood in a large white coat and a flower hat that fell over my eyes, obviously playing dress ups with our Grandma Claudia. I gave a small laugh as I watched Rosa and myself explain to dad that Rosa was a famous Ballerina and I was a rich lady from the audience with her husband Teddy.
“Daddy can be a audience person too!” I squealed in excitement while tripping and falling over my clothes in an attempt to walk to my father who then lifted me into his lap with soft chuckles.
“Are you wearing Mommy’s Lipstick?” My dad asked me mockingly trying hard not to laugh as I looked up into the camera shaking my head quickly followed by a loud ‘No’. I was obviously lying because my mouth was covered in bright red lipstick.
“Oh Jeffrey, leave her alone she looks beautiful in it.” The camera swung around to the voice of my beloved Grandma Claudia who now hovered above my father and snatched the camera from his hands.
“Grandma.” I whispered out placing fingers on my grandma’s glowing face, never noticing that Max had been crouched beside me this whole time.
The camera then swung away from my Grandma Claudia’s face and back to see me sitting on my Dad lap and him smiling up to the camera holding me close.
“Mom ya gotta stop dressing my girls up in lipstick, pretty soon they’ll have boys chasing them!” My dad said followed by me squealing a loud ‘Eww’.
“Aww boys aren’t that bad.” My father chuckled to me as I scrunched up my nose in disgust.
“Yes they are!” I squealed once again.
“But I’m a boy!” My Dad playfully challenged as I held his face between my child-size hands laughing as he repeated his words and lifted me above his head.
“But you’re my Daddy and I love you.” I childishly squealed in delight still held above his head.
“How much do you love me?” Dad asked while bringing my face closer to his.
“Dis much!” I exclaimed holding my arms out like an airplane.
“That much?” My dad gasped as he looked at me with wide eyes then quickly put me back in his lap and give me kisses all over my face as I laughed in girlish happiness. He finally finished then held me close to his face once again, his nose touching mine, “I love you too, Butterbean.”
The moment was short but pure, a sweet moment between daddy and daughter. It was hard to believe this ever happened to me. It was like someone else's life.
Rosa then jumped into the scene landing on Dad’s back and climbing on him. My dad let out a mocking scream as Rosa and I tumbled around with him on the couch, giggling as we poked and tickled him.
“Mother, Help me! It’s the tickle monsters! Save me!” He bellowed out over our bursting laughter.
“I’m coming my son!” Grandma Claudia bellowed back mockingly. Then the screen went blank.
I could feel Max place one hand on my back tenderly as I vacantly watched the snowy screen before me.
“I’ve never seen that before.” I whispered as the tape rewound and popped back out.
“What about all these other tapes?” Max gestured towards the scattered floor of tapes. I shook my head slowly in response.
“It’s so weird, it’s like I’m looking into someone else’s life. God, Rosa looks so different to what I remember.”
“So does your Dad. You okay?” Max added as he watched me nodded slowly never once removing my eyes from the screen.
“Liz, I found this.” Max said finally, holding up a file folder marked ‘Evidence’. Max placed it in front of me and I finally looked away from the screen.
I gulped once as I stared down at the file laying on my lap. This could hold the very last note that Rosa wrote, the very last thoughts that went through her mind while she was still breathing.
“Liz, are you going to open it?” Max asked softly as I sat closer to him. I jerked my head in what I thought was a nod and ran my fingers over the edge of the file. I held my breath as I flipped the file open.
“Oh my God.”
TBC
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Hybrid-Angel
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 57
- Joined: Tue Dec 31, 2002 5:32 pm
- Location: A room with padded walls
Okay guyz, put the gloves away and read that next part. thanks for ur words everyone and..HAPPY EASTER!!!!...hope the Easter Bunny is good to u all.
Chapter 26
“What is it?” Max questioned looking at the document closely.
“It’s her records.” I exclaimed in amazement flipping through the sheets.
“How did your Dad get her records?”
“I don’t know, he went into this whole denial thing trying to investigate her death by himself so I guess he must have got them then.” I flipped through the document while Max brought his head to rest on my shoulder as he read a police report.
“…Miss Parker held responsible on all counts of supplying alcohol to minors with fake identification. Denies being supplier of illegal drugs also brought to the party scene....”
“Yeah, one of the many party scenes she went to and ended up arrested.” I finished with a shake of my head as I sorted through the bundle again and handed Max half of it.
“It’s like you can draw a line through her life, one minute she’s my big sister and the next she a total stranger.” I whispered as the flicking of paper could be heard through the stillness of the room.
“Do you remember her much? Like what she was like a couple of days before she overdosed?” Max asked hesitantly as I look up from the papers to see him awkwardly trying to make the question casual.
“Not really, I just remember that she had come back from a trip with her ‘friends’ and was all weird about it. Like something had happened on the trip.”
“Like what?” Max queried again, interest knotting his brow.
“I don’t know, like something changed her. I could just be reading into it.”
“Maybe not, something might have driven her to it, Liz.” Max said carefully as what he was saying dawned on my face. What if Rosa had done something bad or had something bad happen to her to make kill herself. A sudden chill ran down my spine at the realization. What could drive someone to such an extreme?
“Let’s just find the note and get outta here.”
Once again Max and I were sorting through paper and documents finding nothing that even spoke of a note, it was becoming a lost cause and I felt the heavy weight of failure plant itself on my shoulders.
With a groan of frustration I threw the papers on the ground and slapped my hands over my dry eyes.
“Nothing!” I grunted out as I rubbed my now sore eyes.
“Me neither.” I heard Max huff as he let his half of the papers fall on top of mine.
“Maybe he destroyed it.” Max offered as he placed an arm around my shoulders and pulled me into his chest rubbing the length of my arm and back.
“Maybe.” I sighed in defeat.
But then I sited the locked filing cabinet on the left side of Max, which only held my father's most important documents. Sitting up straight out of Max’s arms I crawled past him and over to the filing cabinet to pull at the drawer-pull a couple of times.
“Can you pick locks?” I turned to Max still holding onto the pull. He gave me a pleading look.
“Please don’t make me open your father’s personal cabinet.” He whined while closing his eyes and then looking to heaven.
“C’mon Max, Pleeease.” I begged while holding my hands together and kneeling beside him.
Still not willing, I sweeten the deal by giving him misty puppy dog eyes and a soft, pleading ‘Please’.
“Okay, Okay.” Max groaned before I jumped into his arms for a quick hug. But as I pulled away Max held my chin and brought me closer to his face “But you owe me, ‘cause I could definitely get killed for this.”
“Fine. Now work your magic.” I said with an all too wanting grin, then jumped back so he could move over to the cabinet.
As we both now stood in front of the cabinet I handed him the pocket knife I thought was appropriate for this situation, but he didn’t take it instead taking a look at me, well my hair.
“What?” I asked as I brushed my hand through my hair thinking something was in it.
“Do you have one of those hair thingies?”
“What a bobby pin?”
“Yeah, one of those.”
“No.”
“You’re a girl and you don’t have a bobby pin?” Max asked dryly, which earned him a pinch on the arm. I then spotted a paper clip on the desk. “What about this?”
“It’ll do.” He huffed then began to pick at the lock, while I hovered above him watching as he did.
After a few quiet moments Max triumphantly pulled the first file drawer open, “So what are we looking for?”
“Anything related to Rosa or anything suspicious.” I said as Max and I started flicking through the files, only finding contracts and deeds. Nothing related to Rosa.
After flicking through and putting things back the way they were Max and I reached the last drawer flicking again through more meaningless documents and coming to yet another dead end.
“I guess he doesn’t have it.” Max sighed as we both sat next to the cabinet the open drawer splitting us apart.
“Yeah.” I sighed as I scanned the rows of files slowly hoping I missed something.
“I’m sorry, Liz I know this was important to you.” Max tenderly said while placing his hand on top of mine as it rested on top of the files.
“Yeah, but I guess I shouldn’t get so worked up over it. It’s like I was expecting it to have every answer.” I shook my head slightly, then something yellow caught the corner of my eye.
I quickly focused to see something yellow behind the drawer, without a single hesitation I slid my hand behind the drawer and plucked out a wrinkled, old yellow envelope. The envelope trembled in my hand as I looked from it to see Max’s curious eyes met mine.
Running my fingers over the edges of the opening I finally pulled out several pieces of paper and an unopened envelope. I felt my heart clog my throat as I opened one piece of paper that was crinkled from too much handling.
When I looked over the inscriptions I knew it was from Rosa. I ran my fingers over the jagged letters that was such a contrast to my own loopy writing. I took one deep breath trying to hold my nerves at bay as I spoke aloud what was written there.
“I guess it’s best to start with, I’m sorry.
By the time you read this letter I’ll be gone. It’s hard to put into words just how much I feel alone in this world, it’s hard to describe why I became the person I am now or was.” My voice trembling on each word as I read them had Max moving next to me to provide as much comfort as possible.
“I only have few regrets in my life; one major one is that I could have been a better sister to Lizzie, a real model for her. Not someone who takes the spotlight and in turn make her feel unwanted by her family. I spent half my life sharing a room with her, and I know how much it hurt her to not have the praise and love I got just from a simple trophy.” I stopped short as I read the next line.
“The unspoken secret in our family has shunned my little sister, who may be my half sister.
My only wish is that she knows the truth, because she deserves it.
Goodbye, I love you all.
Rosa.”
I felt sick, physically ill, at the words ‘my half sister’. My stomach dropped and tears flooded my eyes as I gripped the paper, starting to feel myself hyperventilate.
“What does she mean half sister?” My voice bubbled with emotions ready to break lose at any moment. Max simply snapped his mouth open and shut in response.
“I don’t know, Liz.”
“What is she talking about? I’m her full sister; I’m my parent’s daughter! This is crazy, why would someone say something like that.” My voice was harsh with labored breaths, as shock took over my body. Half sister! She must have been doped up when she wrote it.
“Liz, calm down.” Max calmly said while bracing my shoulder as I threw the note from my fingers.
“Calm down? I can’t calm down! I just found out that the reason why my father turned a cold shoulder on me, why Rosa was the golden child, why my mother stood in the shadows and let my life fall apart!
I can’t even get my head around this, Max.”
“Okay, but just think of the baby. We can’t let your stress levels go haywire.”
“They all ready have!” I sobbed in furious anger that I had been a total outcast my entire life to this family; that my very existence represents something unfaithful that happened in the past. My father resents my existence because it represents pain and hate.
“Oh my god, no wonder my Dad hates me.” I sobbed “I’m just a mistake.” I cried out again, finding the tears and whimpers hard to suppress.
Max quickly pulled me into his arms rocking me back and forth as we sat together in the dank study, papers littering the floor in front of us. Max did everything he could to try and sooth my harsh sobs by kissing the top of my head, my forehead, stroking my hair and rubbing slow circles on my back.
“Its okay, Liz. I’m here, its okay.” He whispered endlessly into my ear, it made me let go more to break down for everything I had been through, it’s like I was crying on the right shoulder. I finally had Max there to understand what I was going through and know what to say and when to hug me.
I gripped him tightly as I let the tears continue to flow, tears for every pain I’ve ever felt. And I felt a tension inside my heart release finally as I snuggled closer into his chest, his large arms like a security blanket. After a few more moments the harsh sobs died down to soft hiccups.
“Feel better?” Max spoke against my forehead still holding me close to his body.
I nodded into his chest wiping my wet face with the back of my hand and sniffing as I did. “It just keeps getting worse.”
“What does?” Max asked, his brow knitted in confusion as I looked emptily into the distance.
“My life.” I sniffed finally and felt Max’s arms wrap around me tighter once more.
“Don’t say that, Liz.” He reassured me, but my silence signified I was unconvinced.
“Listen to me,” Max pulled me away from his chest “As long as I’ve known you, you’ve never let the weight for a problem pull you down, if anything they make you stronger. With all the bullshit that happens to us in life, you gotta have faith that things happen for a reason.”
“So you think I was meant to find this letter, which basically proves that my family hates me.” I retorted dryly, as more tears followed.
“No, I think this might be the key to mending your family. Nothing in life is easy, Liz.” I merely scoffed at Max as he tried again to look into my eyes and make a point.
“Just think of that family there.” Max point to the T.V screen which minutes ago played a happy moment in time where things were easy. “If it was like that once, it can be like that again.”
I bit my lip as I stared at the blank T.V screen, finding sense in what Max was saying but at the same time the doubts swirled and tumbled through my thoughts.
“It still hurts though.” I whimpered when I turn back to Max’s warm eyes that glistened as they looked into mine.
“I guess that’s the true test of love, overcoming all the pain just because you love someone that much.”
His whispered words held double meaning, sending chills down my spine as our heads touched and our breath mingled once more, my doubting pain just turned into flattered excitement of having Max so close and yet so far.
I inched closer once more our lips barely brushing against each other, then I saw the focus in Max’s eyes as he snapped away quickly while I lingered in the same spot wanting his return.
“C’mon, we better get outta here.” Max quickly added then stood just as fast and picked me up with him.
After replacing things back the way they were I shuffled out of the study my mind a cloud of confusion as Max followed close behind. I had so many feelings running through my blood that I just now felt overwhelmingly numb. Max placed a hand on the small of my back ushering me out of the study. As soon as we reached the door I spotted my mom standing at the opposite end of the room a gaping expression on her face and groceries in hand.
“Liz! What are you doing?” My mom squealed while looking between Max’s lowering expression and my stone cold one.
“Max, you shouldn’t be here!” She sternly looked over Max as if he just walking into a Girls Locker room.
“I’m sorry, Mrs. Parker I’ll just--”
“No,” I looked from Max to my mother “I asked him to come.”
“Liz I don’t know--”
“Did you have an affair?” The question came out icy and harsh and my mother gaped in surprise at my interruption. She fell completely silent.
“Did you?!” I yelled taking a step forward and watching her face turn a sickly, pale white. She was like a deer caught in the headlights and I couldn’t hold back the fury coursing through my veins.
“AM I SOME OTHER MANS CHILD! AM I A BASTARD?” I screamed as unshed tears blurred my vision, but it didn’t stop my hounding. It was like I went into auto-drive; my angered emotions were taking over.
“The reason I have been put through such a fucked up life is because for you!” I pointed accusingly.
“Because you had some fucking affair and never told Dad until I was older that I wasn’t his child. That’s why he hates me, he resents me because I’m living proof that you cheated on him!” My mother still gawked at me dropping the shopping she held.
“So you just hide in his shadows letting him do what he wants and despise me for something I’m not even guilt of. No wonder you both loved your precious Rosa so much, because she wasn’t a mistake!”
By the time I was finished I was shaking all over, tears streamed down my cheeks as continued to glare at her still frozen form. Why didn’t she move, why didn’t she scream that I was wrong? Please make her scream that I’m wrong. My chest heaved erratically as I tried to control my sobs and trembling breath. I was so fueled with vile anger that I felt disgusted with myself, I’m not who I thought I was. My name is a lie.
“How could you keep this from me? How could you just let me continue to carry on with my life thinking I was just someone a person could never love?”
I never noticed the bewildered looked on Max’s face as he stood behind me. I suddenly felt myself sway as I watched my mother crumble to the floor in still shocked emotions. She just vacantly stared into the space between us. I felt Max’s arms quickly embrace my waist and pull me out of the room and down the hall way to my bedroom.
All of a sudden I just went into shut down, I didn’t move or talk. I felt like the past few minutes just happened without me knowing. I didn’t know what I felt right now; all I knew was that I just mouthed off to my mother, who I hold responsible for making my life hell.
I felt dirty, really, really dirty. If I’m not a Parker then what am I. My mother told my Dad which began his distance thing with me when I was around eight or nine and then Rosa became the shinning star….. well more then usual. I’m nobody, I shouldn’t even exist.
“Liz, put this on.” I heard Max’s voice behind me, and then I felt my arms slip into the sleeves of my navy blue coat.
“You’re not staying here tonight, it’s too much stress for you to just be here and have to put up with your parents. You’ll stay with me tonight till we figure something out, okay?”
I could barely hear him as he braced my shoulders to move me in the direction of my door. I stumbled as he pulled me to his side with his hand clutching mine. I stood blankly against his arms as he asked again.
“Okay?” I nodded without looking at him as he rushed us down the hall once more and past my still stunned mother who hadn’t moved one inch. Max stopped abruptly while in the midst of opening the front door, then spun around to my mother, my heart quickened with every second he just stared down at her.
“I’m taking Liz; it’s too much stress for her and our baby.” Max stated sternly then spun back around storming out the door with me tailing behind feeling I could breathe easier with each step we took away from that place.
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Hybrid-Angel
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 57
- Joined: Tue Dec 31, 2002 5:32 pm
- Location: A room with padded walls
Kelli-Thank u so much for coming out of lurkdom, i'm in total awe that u can reflect on my character help u sort out ur problems. Wow, i never thought i'd touch on someones life. 
i'm soooo appreciative of ur kind words, plus the praise
thank u again for reading and posting.
P.S Never doubt ur feelings
Stacie-good to have ya posting again. i wondered where u went
Thank u for reading Jason's Lover and Sydney ( welcome and thank u for ur compliments )
Now i won't leave u waiting ne longer so heres the next chapter hot from the beta oven
Chapter 27
"Max, Liz what are you doing here?" Michael blurted out in surprise when he found Max and me standing outside the front door of his apartment. He quickly noticed that I had been crying and stepped aside to let both of us in.
Max had decided that it would be too risky to take me to his house for the night so he opted for his best friend’s apartment. Michael had been living on his own for a little over a year, as it was easier than living in a tiny trailer park outside of town. He came from a poor but loving family that only wanted the best for him; a part of me envied that fact. Not only was Michael a good student but his family was always proud of him no matter what he did.
"Can we stay here tonight?" I heard Max in the distance, as I just stood in the middle of the room, tired from all the emotion. It was like my mind was stuffed with cotton wool and I could not make heads or tails of things.
"Yeah sure, you and Liz can take my bed and I’ll sleep on the couch." Michael said with a confused glance from me to Max.
"What happened?" I heard Michael whisper in Max’s direction.
"Long story, listen I’m just gonna go over to my house and tell my parents I’m staying here. Can you watch her for me?"
"Sure."
They spoke like I wasn’t in the room, obviously from the appearance I was giving I must have looked completely out of it. I stared at the floor in front of me with a glazed over expression as I was pulling down the sleeve of my coat over my hands, and transferring my weight from one foot to the other even so slightly.
"I’ll be back soon, just try to rest okay." Max whispered to me then planted a kiss on top of my forehead before rushing out of the apartment and disappearing into the crisp night air.
"Liz? Um, are you hungry?" Michael asked as he came to stand in front of me, my vision now focusing on his chest. I shook my head, slowly blinking back growing tears of bitterness at my family and its lies.
"Wanna sit down? I was just about to watch some cartoons." Michael asked again, I could feel his eyes search my face waiting for it to break in the slightest moment. He looked uneasy at me just standing there and not doing anything but blinking. So for his sake I sat down on the couch quietly and he took the seat next to me.
"You sure you don’t want some fruit loops?" He asked again awkwardly, his big hand pointing to the small kitchen behind us. I shook my head, again staring down at the floor.
"Okay." Michael said quietly then sat back in his seat with a sigh.
"What’s it like?" I blurted out,
"What?" Michael asked as he sat back up in his seat crouching forward with his elbows on his knees and his large hands dangling.
"To have a perfect family." I murmured as I lifted my head to stare out the window into the distance.
"My family isn’t perfect." Michael stated with an underlining scoff.
"Yes, it is you have always had the most loving Mom and Dad who are so proud of you and never make you feel like you shouldn’t exist in this world." I blubbered turning teary eyes to him.
"Liz," he paused and shuffle closer to my side "Trust me my family isn’t perfect, I lived in a trailer for most of my life because my parents couldn’t afford anything."
"It’s doesn’t matter that they don’t have money." I spat out becoming more upset.
"Yes it did, to me anyway. I was a total problem child from the other side of the tracks. My father was never around because he worked so many jobs and so did my mother. A part of that time as I grew up my father had an affair, but my mother acted like it never happened."
My mouth dropped open in awe of what Michael just said to me, I knew he had a tough life with money issues but never did I think Mr. Guerin had an affair. Michael spoke so calmly of it, like he was speaking of what he had for dinner last night.
"Your dad had an affair?" Michael simply nodded.
"How are you not furious with him?" I asked in confusion, Michael simply shrugged his shoulders.
“Maybe because he chose my Mother and me in the end.”
"My mom had an affair and I just found out." I blurted out to him, in some ways hoping he would tell me something that made this all better.
"Oh." Was all he could say, so much for the advice and comfort. My eyes glistened again.
"How did you find out that your Mom had an affair?" He finally asked clasping his hands together.
"It was in a note Rosa left before she died. She called me her half sister." Tears began to fall once more at the memory of the heartbreaking letter.
"So did it say something about your Mom having the affair?" Michael questioned again with a brow knitted in confusion and concern, something I never saw on Michael Guerin.
"No, it just said that I was her half sister." I sniffed wiping away flowing tears.
"Then how do you know it was you Mom who had the affair?" The question had been in my mind ever since I stepped outside that study. It was a question that I hope for, but I already knew the answer. It was plain in the expression in her face.
"I know it’s her because she was the one who never stood up for me in front of my dad, like I wasn’t even worth standing up for. She let him hate me and for good reason." I sobbed after a while.
Michael wrapped his arm around me and pulled me into his chest as I sobbed and whimpered. Michael was sometimes the stone wall and short tempered one, but when it came to the comfort of others he knew when to swoop in. I appreciated Michael all the more; in that second; he had gone from a friend to a close friend.
"Hey, listen don’t you worry about any of this for now. You’ll deal with all this in the morning and for now I’m gonna make you my world famous scrambled eggs." He smiled goofily down into my red face, I couldn’t resist smiling back and letting him make me scrambled eggs.
Michael surprisingly was quiet the chef, I mean I knew he could flip burgers but not actually make a meal from scratch. Even though I didn’t eat that much so much as force my food down I was still happy Michael went to the trouble plus I think it made him feel better.
"Thank you, Michael. It was lovely." I said to Michael just before Max came bursting through the door livid with anger.
Max slammed the door and threw his leather jacket across the room.
I stood quickly feeling my heart pump with fear, I knew that face. It was the face Max only had when something bad went down with his father. Obviously Michael knew the face too, because he came to stand beside me giving me a querying look at Max’s frustrated façade.
"Man, what's up?" Michael quickly asked as we both watched Max pace to the other side of the room then stop with his back to us.
"Nothing." Max grunted bracing his hands behind his head and looking to heaven. He was more than just upset.
"Max, something obviously happened." I stated taking a step forward in his direction, but Michael held me back, as he must have sensed that Max was over the edge.
Max quickly spun around snatching up a lamp as he did and hauled it into the wall across the room. The lamp broken into two large pieces then fell to the floor in a shattered heap. I flinched at his sudden violence and then let my eyes wander back to Max’s heaving form.
He stared at the wall, breathing heavily with a face contorted with livid intensity before he let he head drop. All I could do was watch as his labored breaths trembled out.
"Sorry, Michael." He whispered shortly.
"It’s okay, man." Michael said then looked to me in worry. I moved forward to stand in front of Max watching as he kept both eyes to the floor. I placed my hand on his chest and titled my head to look into his eyes.
"Max, tell us what happened?" I tenderly asked at I watched him close his eyes and shake his head softly before bring his sorrow filled eyes to mine.
"It’s nothing; I just had a fight with my Dad. That’s all." He lied before looking to Michael then back to me.
Both Michael and I knew it was more than a fight and we knew not to touch on it right now. Max was in no mood to talk about it and if he did it would only make him worse. After a few moments Max walked over to the couch and sat down with a thud. I exchanged a worried glance with Michael which didn’t go unnoticed by Max.
"Enough with the worried looks, I’m fine." Max huffed in annoyed anger, but it left Michael and I unconvinced. Max felt it in our silence so he added, "I swear."
I decided to let it go for now and just pretend that what had happened didn’t happen. It’s the least I could do for Max since he helped me discover my mother’s affair and betrayal.
I walked over to Max was a deep sigh and flopped down next to him. He wrapped his arms around my shoulder and pulled me into his chest. To me there was no safer place on earth then in his arms.
"Okay, kiddies I’ve got a date with Maria and if I’m late she’ll beat me to death. So make yourselves at home and behave yourselves." Michael quickly said as he reached for his jacket and was out of the apartment in no time.
Max and I just sat in silence for a few moments. As I rested my head on his chest I could hear his uneven breathing. I stopped myself twice from asking him what really happened with his father but something told me this was better left unsaid. Something in the way he held himself and the look in his eyes that just screamed that he wanted to be left on this one. So I did.
I was beginning to trust Max enough to know that he would eventually come around and tell me. I realized I can’t push these kind of things with Max, like when I wanted to desperately know about his brother Jeremy, I pushed and pushed and made him chosen between me and his most fearful secrets.
I’m pretty sure that if I had kept a cool head back then he would have told me, he even said he would have a couple of nights ago in one of our nightly visits. It’s strange to think back before then when I was on top of the world, before it all of a sudden it came crashing down in a heap of turmoil, the trigger being a pregnancy test.
I cringed inwardly at the memory of taking it; I had never felt so on edge. I remember furiously throwing it across the bathroom and falling into a puddle of fearful tears. While I’m still a little scared about this pregnancy, I would not change the fact that I have my baby.
I looked up to Max seeing his vacant and painful stare; I frowned slightly feeling that there really wasn’t much I could do to distract him from his obvious bitter thoughts. Then I thought back to what I realised this morning when I woke up.
"Hey," I snapped Max quickly out of his thoughts because he looked down at me in curiosity. "I’ll be in my Second Trimester in a few days, it’s almost thirteen weeks." I declared with a smile hoping it would warm Max’s heart.
And sure enough it did, a huge grin spread across his face as he looked down at my belly.
"Wow." He breathed, still looking at my stomach.
"Here you can feel a bump in my stomach." I declared with a grin as I took Max's hand and placed it over my stomach. Unknown to him I shivered when his hand came into contact with my bare skin. I shook it off and focused on trying to make Max feel better.
"Where?" Max laughed as he softly ran his hand up and down my lower abdomen making me tingle all over.
"There!" I said taking his hand and directing it over the bump in my stomach. My hand lay over his as I held it in the spot where our baby was growing.
"Liz, you’re so petite I can’t tell. I think you’re imagining things."
"I’m not, I swear there’s a bump, look." I quickly stood up to prove my point and show Max the tiny bump in my stomach.
"See." I said looking down at my stomach still holding up my shirt at my ribs as I stood side on.
Max quietly stared at my stomach somewhat in awe, he then slowly stood up in front of me and placed one hand over my stomach. His large hand covered most of stomach. I shuddered a breath again at the contact of his skin to mine. I felt a spark flare between us as he held his hand in place, slightly caressing my stomach.
"Liz, I want you to know that I’ll always be here for you and the baby." He vowed in a deep, thick voice.
"I know," was all I could mutter, I was too focussed on Max's hand and its feather touch was becoming more then I could stand.
"And you know I love you so much, right?" he whispered once again, our foreheads now resting on each other.
"I know." Again it was all I could think of to say.
"And I’ll do anything for you and the baby." He inched closer to my mouth, our breath mingling. I ran my hands up his chest and looped them around his neck, bringing my body slightly closer. His hand never leaving my stomach.
I nodded and said once more "I know." I inched closer once again and brushed my lips against his, ever so lightly. And this time he didn’t pull away.
With one last heated gaze between us our lips clashed together in heat of lust and want. It was like he was a starving man and I was a feast before him. If first started out gently, with a soft, sensual kiss then I ran my touch along his lip seeking access.
I wasn’t disappointed, his slick tongue plunged into my mouth and I groaned loudly with such prolonged pleasure. His taste, his caress was all too intoxicating. I felt weak in the knees but before they could buckle Max picked my up under my buttocks and held me against his muscled body.
The kiss was blinding, I could barely concentrate on what my body was doing because all of a sudden I realized Max had pinned me up against a wall and began running his hot lips down my neck and over my collar bone.
I trembled as I felt his hot breath on my tingling skin, the tenderness and forcefulness in his lips and tongue was slowly driving me mad. I wanted him closer, I needed him closer. The tension was building to an all time high.
I ran my fingers through his slick dark hair pressing my fingers into his scalp to will him towards my mouth, he teased me by slightly grinding into me with his restricted throbbing member. I gasped as he took my hip and pressed me further into his body.
It was uncontrollable and restricted all at once. We craved each other more, but knew we shouldn’t. We teased each other caressing, touched each other in sensitive places, darted and licked at each other. Making the resistance to going further weaker and weaker.
I pulled Max’s head to my lips, forcefully caressing his mouth much the way he did. I rolled my head from side to side trying to gain a quick access into his intoxicating mouth.
Sliding one hand down in between us I reached the top of Max’s jeans and cupped his crotch forcefully, making him groan with painful pleasure. As I reached for the button of the jeans I heard a creak from behind us.
"WHOA!" Michael screamed from the doorway, shielding his eyes.
The surprise was automatic, Max and I jumped out of each other's arms like an electric pulse. We were both pink and rumpled looking as if we were two children caught out doing a bad thing.
Max held up his jeans staring at Michael in embarrassment, while I flicked hair out of my face and pulled my top down quickly. At some point Max and I had traveled from the wall to the me straddling him on the couch. I was so hazed over with chaotic arousal that I didn’t even realize Max moving us around.
"Um, just came to get my keys." Michael awkwardly emphasized by jingle them in his hands and then making a hasty exit.
As soon as Michael closed the door, an unexpectedly awkward silence stretched between us. We readjusted ourselves and I had finally been jolted back into reality……unfortunately.
"I’m sorry." Max and I said simultaneously, and then followed by a nervous chuckle.
"Maybe we should slow it down a notch. I don’t want to end up where we started." Max quickly said after a few moments.
"Me too." As I murmured my response, I watched Max walk closer to me with a little smile, I had it down bite down on my lip to cover the smile at what we just did.
"So what would that make us?" I questioned smiling coyly
"I guess it makes us friends plus." He said in a syrupy tone caressing my cheek then tucking hair behind my ear.
"I like it." I whispered, all too happy with our development, friends plus was the perfect name for what we were right now.
We had broken down a communication boundary between us over the past week. Even with our doubts we could still confront each other about them in our own time. While the whole Tess thing still scared me, I had faith in the fact that I could get through it and trust Max again soon. I held onto that faith like a lifeline, because without it I wouldn’t be here right now.
Max kissed the top of my forehead and I closed my eyes trying to remember the feel by heart "I love you, Liz."
"I love you, Max." I breathed before embracing him tightly and never wanting to let go.
i'm soooo appreciative of ur kind words, plus the praise thank u again for reading and posting.
P.S Never doubt ur feelings
Stacie-good to have ya posting again.
i wondered where u wentThank u for reading Jason's Lover and Sydney ( welcome and thank u for ur compliments )
Now i won't leave u waiting ne longer so heres the next chapter hot from the beta oven
Chapter 27
"Max, Liz what are you doing here?" Michael blurted out in surprise when he found Max and me standing outside the front door of his apartment. He quickly noticed that I had been crying and stepped aside to let both of us in.
Max had decided that it would be too risky to take me to his house for the night so he opted for his best friend’s apartment. Michael had been living on his own for a little over a year, as it was easier than living in a tiny trailer park outside of town. He came from a poor but loving family that only wanted the best for him; a part of me envied that fact. Not only was Michael a good student but his family was always proud of him no matter what he did.
"Can we stay here tonight?" I heard Max in the distance, as I just stood in the middle of the room, tired from all the emotion. It was like my mind was stuffed with cotton wool and I could not make heads or tails of things.
"Yeah sure, you and Liz can take my bed and I’ll sleep on the couch." Michael said with a confused glance from me to Max.
"What happened?" I heard Michael whisper in Max’s direction.
"Long story, listen I’m just gonna go over to my house and tell my parents I’m staying here. Can you watch her for me?"
"Sure."
They spoke like I wasn’t in the room, obviously from the appearance I was giving I must have looked completely out of it. I stared at the floor in front of me with a glazed over expression as I was pulling down the sleeve of my coat over my hands, and transferring my weight from one foot to the other even so slightly.
"I’ll be back soon, just try to rest okay." Max whispered to me then planted a kiss on top of my forehead before rushing out of the apartment and disappearing into the crisp night air.
"Liz? Um, are you hungry?" Michael asked as he came to stand in front of me, my vision now focusing on his chest. I shook my head, slowly blinking back growing tears of bitterness at my family and its lies.
"Wanna sit down? I was just about to watch some cartoons." Michael asked again, I could feel his eyes search my face waiting for it to break in the slightest moment. He looked uneasy at me just standing there and not doing anything but blinking. So for his sake I sat down on the couch quietly and he took the seat next to me.
"You sure you don’t want some fruit loops?" He asked again awkwardly, his big hand pointing to the small kitchen behind us. I shook my head, again staring down at the floor.
"Okay." Michael said quietly then sat back in his seat with a sigh.
"What’s it like?" I blurted out,
"What?" Michael asked as he sat back up in his seat crouching forward with his elbows on his knees and his large hands dangling.
"To have a perfect family." I murmured as I lifted my head to stare out the window into the distance.
"My family isn’t perfect." Michael stated with an underlining scoff.
"Yes, it is you have always had the most loving Mom and Dad who are so proud of you and never make you feel like you shouldn’t exist in this world." I blubbered turning teary eyes to him.
"Liz," he paused and shuffle closer to my side "Trust me my family isn’t perfect, I lived in a trailer for most of my life because my parents couldn’t afford anything."
"It’s doesn’t matter that they don’t have money." I spat out becoming more upset.
"Yes it did, to me anyway. I was a total problem child from the other side of the tracks. My father was never around because he worked so many jobs and so did my mother. A part of that time as I grew up my father had an affair, but my mother acted like it never happened."
My mouth dropped open in awe of what Michael just said to me, I knew he had a tough life with money issues but never did I think Mr. Guerin had an affair. Michael spoke so calmly of it, like he was speaking of what he had for dinner last night.
"Your dad had an affair?" Michael simply nodded.
"How are you not furious with him?" I asked in confusion, Michael simply shrugged his shoulders.
“Maybe because he chose my Mother and me in the end.”
"My mom had an affair and I just found out." I blurted out to him, in some ways hoping he would tell me something that made this all better.
"Oh." Was all he could say, so much for the advice and comfort. My eyes glistened again.
"How did you find out that your Mom had an affair?" He finally asked clasping his hands together.
"It was in a note Rosa left before she died. She called me her half sister." Tears began to fall once more at the memory of the heartbreaking letter.
"So did it say something about your Mom having the affair?" Michael questioned again with a brow knitted in confusion and concern, something I never saw on Michael Guerin.
"No, it just said that I was her half sister." I sniffed wiping away flowing tears.
"Then how do you know it was you Mom who had the affair?" The question had been in my mind ever since I stepped outside that study. It was a question that I hope for, but I already knew the answer. It was plain in the expression in her face.
"I know it’s her because she was the one who never stood up for me in front of my dad, like I wasn’t even worth standing up for. She let him hate me and for good reason." I sobbed after a while.
Michael wrapped his arm around me and pulled me into his chest as I sobbed and whimpered. Michael was sometimes the stone wall and short tempered one, but when it came to the comfort of others he knew when to swoop in. I appreciated Michael all the more; in that second; he had gone from a friend to a close friend.
"Hey, listen don’t you worry about any of this for now. You’ll deal with all this in the morning and for now I’m gonna make you my world famous scrambled eggs." He smiled goofily down into my red face, I couldn’t resist smiling back and letting him make me scrambled eggs.
Michael surprisingly was quiet the chef, I mean I knew he could flip burgers but not actually make a meal from scratch. Even though I didn’t eat that much so much as force my food down I was still happy Michael went to the trouble plus I think it made him feel better.
"Thank you, Michael. It was lovely." I said to Michael just before Max came bursting through the door livid with anger.
Max slammed the door and threw his leather jacket across the room.
I stood quickly feeling my heart pump with fear, I knew that face. It was the face Max only had when something bad went down with his father. Obviously Michael knew the face too, because he came to stand beside me giving me a querying look at Max’s frustrated façade.
"Man, what's up?" Michael quickly asked as we both watched Max pace to the other side of the room then stop with his back to us.
"Nothing." Max grunted bracing his hands behind his head and looking to heaven. He was more than just upset.
"Max, something obviously happened." I stated taking a step forward in his direction, but Michael held me back, as he must have sensed that Max was over the edge.
Max quickly spun around snatching up a lamp as he did and hauled it into the wall across the room. The lamp broken into two large pieces then fell to the floor in a shattered heap. I flinched at his sudden violence and then let my eyes wander back to Max’s heaving form.
He stared at the wall, breathing heavily with a face contorted with livid intensity before he let he head drop. All I could do was watch as his labored breaths trembled out.
"Sorry, Michael." He whispered shortly.
"It’s okay, man." Michael said then looked to me in worry. I moved forward to stand in front of Max watching as he kept both eyes to the floor. I placed my hand on his chest and titled my head to look into his eyes.
"Max, tell us what happened?" I tenderly asked at I watched him close his eyes and shake his head softly before bring his sorrow filled eyes to mine.
"It’s nothing; I just had a fight with my Dad. That’s all." He lied before looking to Michael then back to me.
Both Michael and I knew it was more than a fight and we knew not to touch on it right now. Max was in no mood to talk about it and if he did it would only make him worse. After a few moments Max walked over to the couch and sat down with a thud. I exchanged a worried glance with Michael which didn’t go unnoticed by Max.
"Enough with the worried looks, I’m fine." Max huffed in annoyed anger, but it left Michael and I unconvinced. Max felt it in our silence so he added, "I swear."
I decided to let it go for now and just pretend that what had happened didn’t happen. It’s the least I could do for Max since he helped me discover my mother’s affair and betrayal.
I walked over to Max was a deep sigh and flopped down next to him. He wrapped his arms around my shoulder and pulled me into his chest. To me there was no safer place on earth then in his arms.
"Okay, kiddies I’ve got a date with Maria and if I’m late she’ll beat me to death. So make yourselves at home and behave yourselves." Michael quickly said as he reached for his jacket and was out of the apartment in no time.
Max and I just sat in silence for a few moments. As I rested my head on his chest I could hear his uneven breathing. I stopped myself twice from asking him what really happened with his father but something told me this was better left unsaid. Something in the way he held himself and the look in his eyes that just screamed that he wanted to be left on this one. So I did.
I was beginning to trust Max enough to know that he would eventually come around and tell me. I realized I can’t push these kind of things with Max, like when I wanted to desperately know about his brother Jeremy, I pushed and pushed and made him chosen between me and his most fearful secrets.
I’m pretty sure that if I had kept a cool head back then he would have told me, he even said he would have a couple of nights ago in one of our nightly visits. It’s strange to think back before then when I was on top of the world, before it all of a sudden it came crashing down in a heap of turmoil, the trigger being a pregnancy test.
I cringed inwardly at the memory of taking it; I had never felt so on edge. I remember furiously throwing it across the bathroom and falling into a puddle of fearful tears. While I’m still a little scared about this pregnancy, I would not change the fact that I have my baby.
I looked up to Max seeing his vacant and painful stare; I frowned slightly feeling that there really wasn’t much I could do to distract him from his obvious bitter thoughts. Then I thought back to what I realised this morning when I woke up.
"Hey," I snapped Max quickly out of his thoughts because he looked down at me in curiosity. "I’ll be in my Second Trimester in a few days, it’s almost thirteen weeks." I declared with a smile hoping it would warm Max’s heart.
And sure enough it did, a huge grin spread across his face as he looked down at my belly.
"Wow." He breathed, still looking at my stomach.
"Here you can feel a bump in my stomach." I declared with a grin as I took Max's hand and placed it over my stomach. Unknown to him I shivered when his hand came into contact with my bare skin. I shook it off and focused on trying to make Max feel better.
"Where?" Max laughed as he softly ran his hand up and down my lower abdomen making me tingle all over.
"There!" I said taking his hand and directing it over the bump in my stomach. My hand lay over his as I held it in the spot where our baby was growing.
"Liz, you’re so petite I can’t tell. I think you’re imagining things."
"I’m not, I swear there’s a bump, look." I quickly stood up to prove my point and show Max the tiny bump in my stomach.
"See." I said looking down at my stomach still holding up my shirt at my ribs as I stood side on.
Max quietly stared at my stomach somewhat in awe, he then slowly stood up in front of me and placed one hand over my stomach. His large hand covered most of stomach. I shuddered a breath again at the contact of his skin to mine. I felt a spark flare between us as he held his hand in place, slightly caressing my stomach.
"Liz, I want you to know that I’ll always be here for you and the baby." He vowed in a deep, thick voice.
"I know," was all I could mutter, I was too focussed on Max's hand and its feather touch was becoming more then I could stand.
"And you know I love you so much, right?" he whispered once again, our foreheads now resting on each other.
"I know." Again it was all I could think of to say.
"And I’ll do anything for you and the baby." He inched closer to my mouth, our breath mingling. I ran my hands up his chest and looped them around his neck, bringing my body slightly closer. His hand never leaving my stomach.
I nodded and said once more "I know." I inched closer once again and brushed my lips against his, ever so lightly. And this time he didn’t pull away.
With one last heated gaze between us our lips clashed together in heat of lust and want. It was like he was a starving man and I was a feast before him. If first started out gently, with a soft, sensual kiss then I ran my touch along his lip seeking access.
I wasn’t disappointed, his slick tongue plunged into my mouth and I groaned loudly with such prolonged pleasure. His taste, his caress was all too intoxicating. I felt weak in the knees but before they could buckle Max picked my up under my buttocks and held me against his muscled body.
The kiss was blinding, I could barely concentrate on what my body was doing because all of a sudden I realized Max had pinned me up against a wall and began running his hot lips down my neck and over my collar bone.
I trembled as I felt his hot breath on my tingling skin, the tenderness and forcefulness in his lips and tongue was slowly driving me mad. I wanted him closer, I needed him closer. The tension was building to an all time high.
I ran my fingers through his slick dark hair pressing my fingers into his scalp to will him towards my mouth, he teased me by slightly grinding into me with his restricted throbbing member. I gasped as he took my hip and pressed me further into his body.
It was uncontrollable and restricted all at once. We craved each other more, but knew we shouldn’t. We teased each other caressing, touched each other in sensitive places, darted and licked at each other. Making the resistance to going further weaker and weaker.
I pulled Max’s head to my lips, forcefully caressing his mouth much the way he did. I rolled my head from side to side trying to gain a quick access into his intoxicating mouth.
Sliding one hand down in between us I reached the top of Max’s jeans and cupped his crotch forcefully, making him groan with painful pleasure. As I reached for the button of the jeans I heard a creak from behind us.
"WHOA!" Michael screamed from the doorway, shielding his eyes.
The surprise was automatic, Max and I jumped out of each other's arms like an electric pulse. We were both pink and rumpled looking as if we were two children caught out doing a bad thing.
Max held up his jeans staring at Michael in embarrassment, while I flicked hair out of my face and pulled my top down quickly. At some point Max and I had traveled from the wall to the me straddling him on the couch. I was so hazed over with chaotic arousal that I didn’t even realize Max moving us around.
"Um, just came to get my keys." Michael awkwardly emphasized by jingle them in his hands and then making a hasty exit.
As soon as Michael closed the door, an unexpectedly awkward silence stretched between us. We readjusted ourselves and I had finally been jolted back into reality……unfortunately.
"I’m sorry." Max and I said simultaneously, and then followed by a nervous chuckle.
"Maybe we should slow it down a notch. I don’t want to end up where we started." Max quickly said after a few moments.
"Me too." As I murmured my response, I watched Max walk closer to me with a little smile, I had it down bite down on my lip to cover the smile at what we just did.
"So what would that make us?" I questioned smiling coyly
"I guess it makes us friends plus." He said in a syrupy tone caressing my cheek then tucking hair behind my ear.
"I like it." I whispered, all too happy with our development, friends plus was the perfect name for what we were right now.
We had broken down a communication boundary between us over the past week. Even with our doubts we could still confront each other about them in our own time. While the whole Tess thing still scared me, I had faith in the fact that I could get through it and trust Max again soon. I held onto that faith like a lifeline, because without it I wouldn’t be here right now.
Max kissed the top of my forehead and I closed my eyes trying to remember the feel by heart "I love you, Liz."
"I love you, Max." I breathed before embracing him tightly and never wanting to let go.
-
Hybrid-Angel
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 57
- Joined: Tue Dec 31, 2002 5:32 pm
- Location: A room with padded walls
here it is...
Chapter 28
“Max?” I murmured as I rolled over, twisting the covers around me and finding the space next to me where Max had slept cold and empty.
“Max?” I yawned while rubbing my eyes and becoming a little alarmed at his whereabouts. We had shared Michael’s bed last night, which he had generously let us sleep in, but with strict orders for Max and me to not do anything in it.
At first Max slept on the floor next to me, but at some time during the night he had crawled up next to me and slept with his arms lovingly around me. And that’s how we stayed for most of the night, just curled up in each other's arms sleeping soundly for the first time in ages.
I actually felt rested and charged up ready to face the mean, cruel world. While I didn’t really want to step foot inside my house again I still wanted answers from my parents. Scary and terrible as it was finding out that I was a result of my mother’s betrayal, it still provided a better understanding as to why I was hated. Strange as it sounds but I’m glad there is a reason behind it.
I took a quick glance to where Max had left his jacket on a chair last night, finding it not there. Sitting up I pulled the sheets off me and looked back to where Max had slept merely hours ago next to me. My eye then caught a small piece of paper on the pillow he used. I snatched it up and smiled at his words. “Had to get home. Call me if you need anything and I’ll see you later on. I love you. Max.”
I ran my fingers over the tiny letters and then snuggled into the pillow Max used, there was still traces of his scent in the fabric so I pushed my face into the pillow hiding a goofy grin. After a few more moments I shifted and stretched as if to prolong the day ahead. It didn’t help much because no matter what I did I still had to go back to that house. I quickly grabbed my jeans and walked the short distance to Michael’s living area in his apartment.
Michael sat on his couch spooning large amounts of cereal into his mouth with the occasionally dribble of milk. It was quiet the picture, but that was Michael for you.
“Morning.” I said while plopping down next to Michael.
“You mean Afternoon.” He mumbled through a mouthful of milk and a mixture of sugary Fruit Loops and Captain Crunch.
“What?”
“It’s Twelve thirty.” He swallowed then pointed to a clock in the distance. I stared at the clocked in shock.
“It’s Twelve thirty!”
“Yup, you want some Fruit Loops?” He said casually then reached over for the remote to turn on the T.V
“As delicious as they look I think I’ll pass, thanks.” I said as I watched Michael pop another large mouthful of mixed, sugar coated cereals into his mouth then give me a shrug.
“When did Max leave?” I asked turning my attention to the T.V as Michael did.
“About two hours ago, he said he had to go sort some shit out.”
“Did he say what kind of shit?” I asked becoming more aware that Max was definitely going through something with his father. Michael just shook his head and ate another spoonful of cereal.
“Michael thanks for letting us stay here for the night.”
“No problem.” Michael looked back at me with a milky grin.
“Okay, well I better go and confront my mom, which I’m not really looking forward too.” I said standing up on shaky knees.
“Liz,” Michael stood up next to me “Just remember that she’s probably just as shook up about it as you are.”
I gave him an unconvinced look “I’m serious, she’s kept something from you that probably has been killing her from day one. There must be a reason behind it.”
“Her only reason is that she’s a coward.” I finished bitterly then grabbed my coat and headed for the door.
“Liz,” I spun around to see Michael still standing by the couch “My door is always open. If you need a place to stay, you’ve got one here.”
My sour face lightened to a warm smile at Michael’s generosity, he had been nothing but a good friend to Max and me through this whole thing. I quickly raced back over and give him a hug. “Thank you.” I mumbled just before I released from his embrace and made my way to the door feeling my true family was with my closest friends.
Within minutes I was outside the Crashdown feeling my stomach dip with anxieties and fears. I didn’t even know what fears I was harboring, I knew I was a mistake from the beginning and that an affair my mother had was the reason I was hated by my family. I wonder if the rest of my family knew, or even Grandma Claudia. And if they did were they all just acting and really hating me instead of loving me. Or what if they didn’t know and they might find out would they shun me out just like my father and mother did.
Feeling that familiar urge to just run away and never look back slowly creeping up on me, I took that first step into the Crashdown before I really chickened out. The place was completely empty except for Eddy who was sitting at the counter sipping some coffee with his apron scrunched up on the counter beside him. He noticed my entrance at the jingle of the doorbell.
“Hey Liz, where you been? I’ve been waiting for ya all morning. I can’t find your Mom or your Dad.” He said standing up and meeting me half way across the Crashdown floor.
“Yeah, I was out all night.” I murmured while looking around the vacant Café.
“You and Evans’ back together now.” He said teasingly with a wink and nudge. For someone who worked the grill, he was always up to date with everything, thanks to Maria.
“No, yes…I mean. We’re friends… friends plus.” I struggled to smile at Eddy desperately wanting to change the subject.
“Uh huh.” He teased once more.
“Listen Eddy, I think I’m gonna close the Crashdown today.”
“Liz, it’s a Saturday it’s gonna get busy.” Eddy said with a confused look.
“Yeah I can tell.” I looked around the Crashdown sarcastically then back to Eddy.
“Okay, but if your Dad asks I’m sick. See ya Liz.”
“Bye.” I said. As he left, I quickly flipped the closed sign around and locked the doors. Dealing with my parents’ restaurant today was something I really didn’t want to have on my plate. I walked up the stairs and into an empty house; I circled the living room and found my mom’s groceries still on the floor from last night.
The house was completely still and silent, which made me totally unprepared for the hand that suddenly clamped on my shoulder. I shrieked loudly and spun around to see my father standing behind me.
“Where’s your Mother? And where have you been all morning?” He asked coldly as I took a few steps back. For the first time since that night he found out I was pregnant he was talking to me.
“I think the question is where you were last night?” I snapped not even trying to hide my emotions.
“Tell me where your Mother is now!” He screamed at me but I wasn’t at all threatened
“Don’t tell me what to do your not my father!” I screamed back causing my father to turn white as a ghost and stumble backwards.
“What?” He breathed in a trembling voice; I was almost scared to see him so taken aback, so….vulnerable.
“I know about Mom’s little affair and I found Rosa’s suicide note telling the big secret that I’m not a full member of this family!”
“You went through my personal files!” Dad was back to angry with only small amount of wavering fear.
“That’s not the point! For years I have wondered why Rosa was a better daughter than me even when she was taking drugs and going away for days on end. I wondered why I was the black sleep when I hadn’t even done anything wrong, I wondered why I wasn’t a person my parents could love!” I yelled through my tears.
“Now I know why, because I represented something terrible my mother did. Every time you looked at me after she told you, you saw a child that wasn’t even yours.” I finished coldly shaking all over and feeling a weight lift from my shoulder with every breath I took.
“If you hated me so much why did you put up with me?” I trembled finally noticing my dad was silently crying
“I don’t hate you, I never hated you.” He murmured.
“Why do I find that hard to believe?” I strained every word blinking back the ever following tears.
At that moment my mother shuffled through the door like a dark cloud hang over her head. She froze when she sighted Dad and me head to head shaking with emotion.
“Where have you been?” My dad finally spoke, looking my mother up and down.
“I went to my sister’s.” She whispered coming closer to my circle of heated rage.
“That’s over four hours away!” My dad yelled only getting a slow nod from my mother…the betrayer. The only person in this family I thought I reached and bonded with over the past couple of weeks.
“I need some space.” She countered quietly.
“Space! You needed space! Well once again everything has turned back around to being everyone else’s needs instead of mine. God you should have just had an abortion while ya still could and then have a child that was actually of both your blood.” I said just stepping over the line; my father temper was catching up with my ranting.
“Don’t you dare speak like that again!” He pointed his finger accusingly yelling furiously
“Why? It’s true, I was a mistake from the beginning!” I retorted without holding back.
“Stop it! Both of you! I can’t handle the way this family had turned out anymore.” My mom yelled surprisingly, making both me and my dad stop.
“Since when has this ever been a family?” I said coldly staring at my mom with an icy glare.
“The closest to it ever being a family was before Rosa died, she was the only thing that kept the thing we have a semi-family.”
The words tumbled out of my mouth and I couldn’t bring any of it back. While I was glad I was venting everything, there was still a tug at the back of my mind telling me to shut the hell up.
“Liz, just stop it!” Mom screamed once again “You don’t think that I’ve hated myself for so long not knowing if Dad was your father. I will never forgive myself for doing such a terrible thing and having you being blamed for it.”
“What do you mean if?” A strange small spark of interested lit up in the back of my mind. She just said if, like maybe or might not be.
Mom took a long time to actually start speaking again, looking between my father and me. “I was never certain of the paternity.”
“Oh that’s just great! God, the twists just keep on coming.” I cried out anew, tears running down my face and collecting in the corners of my mouth.
“Liz, calm down. I can explain.” My mom took a calmer approach out reaching her hands like she still had the right to touch. I flinched back, obviously hurting her feelings with my reactions. But I simply didn’t care.
“I don’t think I want to hear it. For so long you could have told me the truth, all I wanted was for you guys to love me. And now I understand why that couldn’t happen.” My voice trembled, while my stomach dipped and turned with the staggered glare of my father and the guilty, teary eyes of my mother.
“I just came back to pack a few things. I’m going to stay with Michael till I sort a few things out, please don’t try to contact me.” I said finally straining each word and avoiding my father's surprisingly shamed looked and my mother now sobbing against his side.
Within a few minutes I was packed with the essentials and clean clothes for at least a couple of weeks. If I need anything else I could just come up through my balcony and get it.
I left the house without a single of a goodbye from me, my mother pleading that I stay while my father sulked on the couch playing with his wedding ring.
What just happened astounded me, all the hurt feelings I had towards my parents just came tumbling out of my mouth and what was even more surprising was that they were actually acting like they cared, like everything I said hit home for them. Like they were actually sorry.
I had just thrown the last of my belongings and bag into the trunk of my car when I saw my father staring at me from the living room window, I didn’t pretend like I didn’t see him. I just stared back at him feeling his blue eyes watch my every move.
Four months ago you could not have told me that within weeks I would have found out I was pregnant and that that news would have had a domino effect on my life, I wouldn’t have believed it. Where I’m standing right now, watching my father watch me, I could feel my old self slip away. This was a new Liz Parker, and this Liz wasn’t gonna take crap from anybody. Not even my lying parents.
I arrived at Michael’s half an hour later and explained to him what just happened. He stood by his word and said I could stay as long as I want. I offered to pay half the rent by he didn’t take it, so I just said I’ll provide the food. I wasn’t going to live in a house that was jam packet with sugar coated foods.
Michael made his couch into a very comfort bed for me and I was so thankful I had him by my side. Michael was the most loyal person I knew, and I now thank god for his friendship.
Michael had just left for his graveyard shift at the night guard job he got at Metachem, when Max came bursting through the door out of breath and soaking wet from the pouring rain that just started to pelt down.
“What is it?” I jumped up from the couch where I had being reading a textbook for school.
“Thank god, you’re here!” Max rushed out coming over to me and giving me a big, wet hug.
“Max, what’s wrong?”
“I went over to your house and you weren’t there. I thought something had happened to you.” Max framed my face with his hands and looked me over like he was searching for any injury.
“Max, I’m fine. I had a fight with my parents, so I’ve moved out for a little while just till I figure things out. Michael offered for me to stay here.” I explain quickly, as I could see Max was on total edge.
“You okay, you look really edgy for someone trying to find me.” I laughed out, but Max didn’t even crack a smile. He just looked me in the eyes and quickly gave me another wet hug.
“I’m just glad you okay.” He whispered into my hair.
“Yeah, I’m fine.” I whispered back for his reassurance, something in the way Max looked at me just then, told me there was more to his bursting entrance and shook-up features.
Something scared him, really scared him.
TBC
Chapter 28
“Max?” I murmured as I rolled over, twisting the covers around me and finding the space next to me where Max had slept cold and empty.
“Max?” I yawned while rubbing my eyes and becoming a little alarmed at his whereabouts. We had shared Michael’s bed last night, which he had generously let us sleep in, but with strict orders for Max and me to not do anything in it.
At first Max slept on the floor next to me, but at some time during the night he had crawled up next to me and slept with his arms lovingly around me. And that’s how we stayed for most of the night, just curled up in each other's arms sleeping soundly for the first time in ages.
I actually felt rested and charged up ready to face the mean, cruel world. While I didn’t really want to step foot inside my house again I still wanted answers from my parents. Scary and terrible as it was finding out that I was a result of my mother’s betrayal, it still provided a better understanding as to why I was hated. Strange as it sounds but I’m glad there is a reason behind it.
I took a quick glance to where Max had left his jacket on a chair last night, finding it not there. Sitting up I pulled the sheets off me and looked back to where Max had slept merely hours ago next to me. My eye then caught a small piece of paper on the pillow he used. I snatched it up and smiled at his words. “Had to get home. Call me if you need anything and I’ll see you later on. I love you. Max.”
I ran my fingers over the tiny letters and then snuggled into the pillow Max used, there was still traces of his scent in the fabric so I pushed my face into the pillow hiding a goofy grin. After a few more moments I shifted and stretched as if to prolong the day ahead. It didn’t help much because no matter what I did I still had to go back to that house. I quickly grabbed my jeans and walked the short distance to Michael’s living area in his apartment.
Michael sat on his couch spooning large amounts of cereal into his mouth with the occasionally dribble of milk. It was quiet the picture, but that was Michael for you.
“Morning.” I said while plopping down next to Michael.
“You mean Afternoon.” He mumbled through a mouthful of milk and a mixture of sugary Fruit Loops and Captain Crunch.
“What?”
“It’s Twelve thirty.” He swallowed then pointed to a clock in the distance. I stared at the clocked in shock.
“It’s Twelve thirty!”
“Yup, you want some Fruit Loops?” He said casually then reached over for the remote to turn on the T.V
“As delicious as they look I think I’ll pass, thanks.” I said as I watched Michael pop another large mouthful of mixed, sugar coated cereals into his mouth then give me a shrug.
“When did Max leave?” I asked turning my attention to the T.V as Michael did.
“About two hours ago, he said he had to go sort some shit out.”
“Did he say what kind of shit?” I asked becoming more aware that Max was definitely going through something with his father. Michael just shook his head and ate another spoonful of cereal.
“Michael thanks for letting us stay here for the night.”
“No problem.” Michael looked back at me with a milky grin.
“Okay, well I better go and confront my mom, which I’m not really looking forward too.” I said standing up on shaky knees.
“Liz,” Michael stood up next to me “Just remember that she’s probably just as shook up about it as you are.”
I gave him an unconvinced look “I’m serious, she’s kept something from you that probably has been killing her from day one. There must be a reason behind it.”
“Her only reason is that she’s a coward.” I finished bitterly then grabbed my coat and headed for the door.
“Liz,” I spun around to see Michael still standing by the couch “My door is always open. If you need a place to stay, you’ve got one here.”
My sour face lightened to a warm smile at Michael’s generosity, he had been nothing but a good friend to Max and me through this whole thing. I quickly raced back over and give him a hug. “Thank you.” I mumbled just before I released from his embrace and made my way to the door feeling my true family was with my closest friends.
Within minutes I was outside the Crashdown feeling my stomach dip with anxieties and fears. I didn’t even know what fears I was harboring, I knew I was a mistake from the beginning and that an affair my mother had was the reason I was hated by my family. I wonder if the rest of my family knew, or even Grandma Claudia. And if they did were they all just acting and really hating me instead of loving me. Or what if they didn’t know and they might find out would they shun me out just like my father and mother did.
Feeling that familiar urge to just run away and never look back slowly creeping up on me, I took that first step into the Crashdown before I really chickened out. The place was completely empty except for Eddy who was sitting at the counter sipping some coffee with his apron scrunched up on the counter beside him. He noticed my entrance at the jingle of the doorbell.
“Hey Liz, where you been? I’ve been waiting for ya all morning. I can’t find your Mom or your Dad.” He said standing up and meeting me half way across the Crashdown floor.
“Yeah, I was out all night.” I murmured while looking around the vacant Café.
“You and Evans’ back together now.” He said teasingly with a wink and nudge. For someone who worked the grill, he was always up to date with everything, thanks to Maria.
“No, yes…I mean. We’re friends… friends plus.” I struggled to smile at Eddy desperately wanting to change the subject.
“Uh huh.” He teased once more.
“Listen Eddy, I think I’m gonna close the Crashdown today.”
“Liz, it’s a Saturday it’s gonna get busy.” Eddy said with a confused look.
“Yeah I can tell.” I looked around the Crashdown sarcastically then back to Eddy.
“Okay, but if your Dad asks I’m sick. See ya Liz.”
“Bye.” I said. As he left, I quickly flipped the closed sign around and locked the doors. Dealing with my parents’ restaurant today was something I really didn’t want to have on my plate. I walked up the stairs and into an empty house; I circled the living room and found my mom’s groceries still on the floor from last night.
The house was completely still and silent, which made me totally unprepared for the hand that suddenly clamped on my shoulder. I shrieked loudly and spun around to see my father standing behind me.
“Where’s your Mother? And where have you been all morning?” He asked coldly as I took a few steps back. For the first time since that night he found out I was pregnant he was talking to me.
“I think the question is where you were last night?” I snapped not even trying to hide my emotions.
“Tell me where your Mother is now!” He screamed at me but I wasn’t at all threatened
“Don’t tell me what to do your not my father!” I screamed back causing my father to turn white as a ghost and stumble backwards.
“What?” He breathed in a trembling voice; I was almost scared to see him so taken aback, so….vulnerable.
“I know about Mom’s little affair and I found Rosa’s suicide note telling the big secret that I’m not a full member of this family!”
“You went through my personal files!” Dad was back to angry with only small amount of wavering fear.
“That’s not the point! For years I have wondered why Rosa was a better daughter than me even when she was taking drugs and going away for days on end. I wondered why I was the black sleep when I hadn’t even done anything wrong, I wondered why I wasn’t a person my parents could love!” I yelled through my tears.
“Now I know why, because I represented something terrible my mother did. Every time you looked at me after she told you, you saw a child that wasn’t even yours.” I finished coldly shaking all over and feeling a weight lift from my shoulder with every breath I took.
“If you hated me so much why did you put up with me?” I trembled finally noticing my dad was silently crying
“I don’t hate you, I never hated you.” He murmured.
“Why do I find that hard to believe?” I strained every word blinking back the ever following tears.
At that moment my mother shuffled through the door like a dark cloud hang over her head. She froze when she sighted Dad and me head to head shaking with emotion.
“Where have you been?” My dad finally spoke, looking my mother up and down.
“I went to my sister’s.” She whispered coming closer to my circle of heated rage.
“That’s over four hours away!” My dad yelled only getting a slow nod from my mother…the betrayer. The only person in this family I thought I reached and bonded with over the past couple of weeks.
“I need some space.” She countered quietly.
“Space! You needed space! Well once again everything has turned back around to being everyone else’s needs instead of mine. God you should have just had an abortion while ya still could and then have a child that was actually of both your blood.” I said just stepping over the line; my father temper was catching up with my ranting.
“Don’t you dare speak like that again!” He pointed his finger accusingly yelling furiously
“Why? It’s true, I was a mistake from the beginning!” I retorted without holding back.
“Stop it! Both of you! I can’t handle the way this family had turned out anymore.” My mom yelled surprisingly, making both me and my dad stop.
“Since when has this ever been a family?” I said coldly staring at my mom with an icy glare.
“The closest to it ever being a family was before Rosa died, she was the only thing that kept the thing we have a semi-family.”
The words tumbled out of my mouth and I couldn’t bring any of it back. While I was glad I was venting everything, there was still a tug at the back of my mind telling me to shut the hell up.
“Liz, just stop it!” Mom screamed once again “You don’t think that I’ve hated myself for so long not knowing if Dad was your father. I will never forgive myself for doing such a terrible thing and having you being blamed for it.”
“What do you mean if?” A strange small spark of interested lit up in the back of my mind. She just said if, like maybe or might not be.
Mom took a long time to actually start speaking again, looking between my father and me. “I was never certain of the paternity.”
“Oh that’s just great! God, the twists just keep on coming.” I cried out anew, tears running down my face and collecting in the corners of my mouth.
“Liz, calm down. I can explain.” My mom took a calmer approach out reaching her hands like she still had the right to touch. I flinched back, obviously hurting her feelings with my reactions. But I simply didn’t care.
“I don’t think I want to hear it. For so long you could have told me the truth, all I wanted was for you guys to love me. And now I understand why that couldn’t happen.” My voice trembled, while my stomach dipped and turned with the staggered glare of my father and the guilty, teary eyes of my mother.
“I just came back to pack a few things. I’m going to stay with Michael till I sort a few things out, please don’t try to contact me.” I said finally straining each word and avoiding my father's surprisingly shamed looked and my mother now sobbing against his side.
Within a few minutes I was packed with the essentials and clean clothes for at least a couple of weeks. If I need anything else I could just come up through my balcony and get it.
I left the house without a single of a goodbye from me, my mother pleading that I stay while my father sulked on the couch playing with his wedding ring.
What just happened astounded me, all the hurt feelings I had towards my parents just came tumbling out of my mouth and what was even more surprising was that they were actually acting like they cared, like everything I said hit home for them. Like they were actually sorry.
I had just thrown the last of my belongings and bag into the trunk of my car when I saw my father staring at me from the living room window, I didn’t pretend like I didn’t see him. I just stared back at him feeling his blue eyes watch my every move.
Four months ago you could not have told me that within weeks I would have found out I was pregnant and that that news would have had a domino effect on my life, I wouldn’t have believed it. Where I’m standing right now, watching my father watch me, I could feel my old self slip away. This was a new Liz Parker, and this Liz wasn’t gonna take crap from anybody. Not even my lying parents.
I arrived at Michael’s half an hour later and explained to him what just happened. He stood by his word and said I could stay as long as I want. I offered to pay half the rent by he didn’t take it, so I just said I’ll provide the food. I wasn’t going to live in a house that was jam packet with sugar coated foods.
Michael made his couch into a very comfort bed for me and I was so thankful I had him by my side. Michael was the most loyal person I knew, and I now thank god for his friendship.
Michael had just left for his graveyard shift at the night guard job he got at Metachem, when Max came bursting through the door out of breath and soaking wet from the pouring rain that just started to pelt down.
“What is it?” I jumped up from the couch where I had being reading a textbook for school.
“Thank god, you’re here!” Max rushed out coming over to me and giving me a big, wet hug.
“Max, what’s wrong?”
“I went over to your house and you weren’t there. I thought something had happened to you.” Max framed my face with his hands and looked me over like he was searching for any injury.
“Max, I’m fine. I had a fight with my parents, so I’ve moved out for a little while just till I figure things out. Michael offered for me to stay here.” I explain quickly, as I could see Max was on total edge.
“You okay, you look really edgy for someone trying to find me.” I laughed out, but Max didn’t even crack a smile. He just looked me in the eyes and quickly gave me another wet hug.
“I’m just glad you okay.” He whispered into my hair.
“Yeah, I’m fine.” I whispered back for his reassurance, something in the way Max looked at me just then, told me there was more to his bursting entrance and shook-up features.
Something scared him, really scared him.
TBC
-
Hybrid-Angel
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 57
- Joined: Tue Dec 31, 2002 5:32 pm
- Location: A room with padded walls
Okay the thread been choppped and i got chapter 29 which i know u'll like.
Chapter 29
It’s been a month since I moved out of home and into Michael’s place. And I couldn’t be happier. I feel so free. Max and I are together again and I’m finally getting the thinking space I deserve. For once my parents are respecting my wishes and have left me alone.
I finally feel normal again, aside from my pregnancy. I decided to talk with my principal last week and tell him my situation, I was excepting to be kicked out of school but Principal Forrester said he didn’t want to lose such a good student so he’s letting me graduate early. As long as my grades are up and I get enough credits I’ll be finished with high school within two months.
Max was behind this all the way saying my education was totally important, that’s why we’ve been helping each other study a little bit every now and then. At school my pregnancy will be kept under wraps except for certain teachers. I was sad I couldn’t graduate with my classmates but now I’m just happy I’m graduating.
Leaving my parent's house to just get away was the smartest thing I’ve done in a long time. While I’m still angry with them and not sure how I can fix this with them, I’m getting on with my life. I’ll be graduating in a couple of months, I’ve gone to my doctor’s appointments and everything looks fine. And Max and I are finally on track.
We’ve grown more over these last couple of months then we have in over a year. Max has been totally supportive about everything and comes to see me anytime he can.
In his very short lunch breaks from the UFO center where his worked for over a year, not that he really needs too because his parents are loaded but he says he does it to be more independent. He comes during those breaks and makes me lunch and brings me a big bag of the choc-chip cookies that I’ve been craving lately. Even with only fifty minutes he can make everything perfect.
Max sometimes comes in the middle of the night just so we can sleep in each other arms. Michael has now learned to leave a spare key outside so Max doesn’t have to break in again.
It’s strange but in ways we’re better then we were before. We listen to each other and don’t hold back what we think. We have almost healed a part of us I thought could never be mended, our friendship.
Our love was always there coated with misunderstandings and fear, but our friendship and trust had been broken. It’s not to say everything is fixed and perfect, because it isn’t.
I’m still worried about Tess; I’ve seen her occasionally talking to Max and giving him the eye. Thank god Max’s only responses so far have been a very cold shoulder. He screamed at her in the school hallways to fuck off and get out of his face last week. This earned him after school detention, but I couldn’t hide my smirk of happiness. I only wish I had been there to see her face and the millions of snickering students in the hallways. Thank god for Maria’s detailed accounts.
While Max and I still have to keep it under hush that we’re back together so his father and many ‘spies’ don’t find out, Max and I now have a secret location and messages as to where we can meet at school or just in general.
While the eraser room only worked for a week, we decided to find different areas to talk, eat together and of course make-out. My toes curl every time I think of our secret little make-out sessions under the bleachers, or in the Art supply room. My heart hammers at the thought of being caught but it just makes the whole thing much more exciting.
While we promise to take it slow we seem to forget every time when we come to something more then just kissing. Max usually takes a shower while I go drink something cold and splash my face with water.
Only lately a cold shower and a refreshing splash of water in the face aren’t working as well as we thought.
We know not to take it to the next level just yet, but it’s very hard to resist. We vowed not to do anything till we're good and ready, emotional and physically. Even when I think we’re totally ready now I mentally slap myself for taking that direction, I did that once and it turned out bad. Max and I were moments away from making love the other night that I began to manipulate Max into believing we were ready just for my own greedy pleasure. Luckily Max has incredibly will power and made me get a grip. That night he had wanted to tell me something, talk to me and all I could think about was tearing his clothes off as soon as he walked into the door.
What had stopped me most of all that night was that I had to talk to him as well; I had completely put aside something that had been plaguing me over this past month. The first night I moved into Michael’s apartment, I was shocked to see Max come running in with the most distressed look on his face.
He had clung to me for dear life and I had to calm him down just to be released from his rain-soaked embrace. I had asked him what was wrong but he just explained that he thought something had happened to me because I wasn’t at my house. I believed him, I still do, but I knew there was an underlining something else that he didn’t want to share with me.
Even that night after he helped me in my father’s study and found out the secret of my family he had come storming into Michael place like he was about to lose all control. I knew something happened with his father, but his demeanor was something I had never seen before. And it kinda scared me.
That’s what brought me to our secret place in Summerhaven Park, behind shrub and brush where it’s almost like a little tree hut. I wanted to ask Max now what had bothered him that night and what had happened between him and his father. It had to be something bad because he was hiding it from me.
“Whatcha thinking?” Max whisper behind me, in turn it made me jumped out of my skin.
“God, you scared me.” I held my heaving chest watching as he made his way over to me and crouched down to kiss me softly on the lips. As he started to pull away I grabbed his shirt and pulled him back.
Max collapsed to his knees surrendering to my deepening kiss; I let my tongue slide into his mouth several times. Delving a little further each time before pulling away, Max was completely blown away as he lingered in the same space with closed eyes as I pulled away from his face.
“What was that for?” He huskily whispered looking down at me with hooded amber eyes.
“Just for being you.” I smiled up at him, some times when we were together I got this upsetting feeling that I might lose him again. That was one of those moments.
“So what’s going on? I can tell there’s something on your mind.” He said after a few moments. He could still read me like an open book.
“Nothing, I was just wondering if your father has said anything to you lately?” I saw the colour slightly drain from his face before he turned his face away from me.
“Nothing, just the usual rants of how I shouldn’t pass the opportunity get somewhere in life, of course he's just talking about me taking over his job. And now ‘cause Isabel’s back from boarding school he's hammering me twice as much.” Max said rolling his eyes and then looking back to me.
“Can’t chose your family.” He stated with a lopsided smile and a shake of his head. I could see he was hiding something.
“Are you sure cause that night when you came rushing into the apartment dripping wet and thinking something happened to me, it kinda seemed like something else was going on.”
Max ducked his head and picked at the grass between us. He was obviously not telling me something, it screamed at me like a foghorn in my mind. Max and I had gotten so far over the past few weeks; I didn’t want to go back to where we just didn’t communicate.
“Max I know you're keeping something from me, and I don’t want to be in the dark about this thing you're obviously having with your father.” I placed my hand on his hand that was still picking at the grass.
“I’m not keeping any secrets from you.” He said continuing to avert his eyes.
“Then what’s wrong?” I shuffled closer to him. He merely shook his head and pressed his lips tightly together. At first I couldn’t see the tears roll down his face till he brought his eyes to mine.
“He said….that if I don’t stop seeing you’ll he’ll make sure I won’t have anyone to see in the end.” Max quavered, his bottom lip quivered slightly.
“That’s what he told me when I left you at Michael’s house and then went home. He threatened to move me to another school and he threatened…..”
“To get rid of me.” I finished off his sentence, feeling my body shake all over.
“Oh Max.” I murmured, seeing how distressed he was, I brought his body to mine and cradled his head on my chest.
It made sense Max wasn’t just being there for me at every minute, he was fearing something would happen to me. It was almost hard to grasp the fact that Mr. Evans would get rid of me, but what scared me most was what Mr. Evans was willing do to keep us apart.
“Max, I’m not going anyway. Okay?” I whispered reassuringly into the top of his head as I stroked his messy dark locks.
Max looked up at me and kissed me haphazardly; our lips softly caressed each other in slow burning ecstasy. And before I knew it I was laying on my back across the blanket we were sitting on and I was unbuttoning Max’s pants as he blindly unbuttoned mine.
It wasn’t fast it was sensual and slow. Time was moving at the right speed. It was like every moment every touch was expanding in ever growing pleasure and harmony. Max led heated trails of kisses down my neck and over my shoulders as I slid my hands under his shirt and ran my fingers over his defined torso.
Blindly we fondled with each others clothes not taking then entirely off but still baring enough so our bodies would come into contract. Max stopped kissing my neck to look down at my stomach.
My shirt had been pulled up exposing my now visible pregnancy, while it still wasn’t that big, it was still noticeable.
I watched in pure trembling delight as Max careful watched my tummy rise and fall with every breath. His boyish features were softened like he was look at something for the first time. Carefully with one hand he placed it on my stomach, running his fingers lightly over my skin. I arched a little at the tender contact, feeling my toes curl with yearning desire.
Max was unaware of my fidgeting with wanton desire, he was just running his fingers over my stomach making lazy circles with each touch.
He brought the tip of his nose to my belly then kissed it ever so softly. I heard him murmur something into my stomach, but I wasn’t too aware of what he was saying. All I was aware of was my twitching body craving his touch.
I felt him kiss my stomach again and then he brought his head up to mine for a deep kiss that set my head spinning. I recovered slightly and then looked up into his sparkling honey gold eyes. I hadn’t seen them look like that in a long time.
“What were you doing?” I whispered with a smile, my heart fluttering at his lopsided grin.
“Just talking to the baby.” He said with a smirk then brought his lips to mine again for another mind-blowing kiss, our tongues plunged and dueled with which other.
“About what?” I giggled into his mouth completely out of breathe.
“How much I love it and you. And how I will always be there for both of you not matter what.”
“Do you promise?” I was slightly serious when I asked and Max could tell it worried me that he might turn his back on me again.
“I promise.” He vowed looking so deep into my eyes that I could see into his soul and he could see into mine.
He sealed that promise with a kiss, a kiss that made my heart beat only for him. A kiss I will never forget, because it was the final kiss that mended us. A part of both of us was growing inside right now, an unspoken connection between us sparked as we held each other in this moment. We were beyond lovers and friends…we were family.
Things began to take another turn when we look into each others eyes and saw the heated stares that asked the question, were we gonna go that to that next level. Max looked down in question and I gave a slight nod as I slowly ran my hand down his stomach and into the waistband of his boxer's.
I stopped deliberately for one moment as I watched Max’s face contort with pleasure at my delicate touch. He looked at me again with pleading eyes as I started sliding my hand around his hardening member.
Max gasped at my touch as I started applying pressure and moving my hand. It was merely enough for me just to hear Max groaning in bliss. Max kissed my jaw line gasping when I ran my fingers over his head and resumed my pressured touch.
With yet another intensifying kiss Max combed his fingers through my hair. I felt a tingling sensation run through my spine as he slow traced one hand down my neck, over my chest and then up into my bra.
I arched my back in aching desire as he caressed my breast and then continued his trail down my torso and to my hip. Creeping his hands into the waistband of my panties I gasped at the contact so close yet so far.
Max teased me by running his hand down my thigh pulling my pants with them. I shivered when he slowly brought his hand up again and slide one finger into my center. My reaction to his touch was automatic and I needed him inside me then and there.
I pushed my hips towards his causing a friction with his constricted throbbing member. I quickly pulled down his boxers to free him. We touched every so slightly before Max drove into me with one deep thrust.
I pulled my body to his, clinging my legs around his hips, feeling this blinding indulgence that I had missed so much. Tears run down the sides of my face and collected in my ears from the pure joy and contentment of having Max touch me this way again. To have our bodies become one, to be together as lovers.
“Are you okay?” He asked stopping abruptly, his face was twisted with concern at the sight of my tears.
I nodded my head with a sweet smile, “I just miss having you inside me.”
“I love you.” Max huskily whispered into my ear and kissed my neck and cheek.
“I love you, Max.” I breathed bracing my arm around his neck and combing my fingers through his messy hair, preparing myself for his next thrust.
My body clenched with every movement, Max drove deeply every time and I felt this incredible feeling of being whole, like I had never felt before. Our relationship was beyond boyfriend and girlfriend, it was more than just lovers, it’s…us. We were becoming unified as a family, Mother, Father and child.
The feeling was electric and I know Max felt it too, I brought his lips to mine once again muffle my cries and moans as I felt myself coming close to the edge, my body was building at a mind-blowing rate. Max drove into me hard and faster as he too was close to release.
“Oh god……. Liz, Liz, Liz.” He chanted into my hot mouth
“Max!” I grasped out
Max looked into my eyes one more time before giving his last hard, deep thrust that made my body tremble with his as we came together shivering and grasping for air.
Max’s body collapsed onto top of mine as he both desperately tried to gain back our breath. After a few moments Max and I pulled and adjusted most of our clothing, Max then rolled beside me and stared down into my face. I still melt under those eyes.
“What?” I smiled up at him snuggling closer to his chest.
“You’re so beautiful.” I feel the biggest smile spread across my face at his comment.
“So are you.” I beamed up at him and slightly shivered from being cold and being so close to him.
“I don’t think I’ll ever stop loving you.” He hummed out with sparkling eyes then kissed my sweaty brow.
“Damn straight.” Max huffed out a laugh at my drolly relpy.
“You shivered before, you're cold.” Max quickly assumed holding me close and pulling down my top which was still exposing my stomach and showing a little of my lacey bra.
“Not really.” I smiled up to him, but he was in total protective mood to even notice. I grinned again with a soft “Really I’m okay.”
Max stopped fussing around to try and get me warmer “I just don’t want anything to happen to you.” He said in boyish innocence.
I framed his face with my hands, caressing his stubbly cheeks with my thumbs. “Nothing is ever gonna happen to me or the baby, I promise.”
Max looked serious, his frightened eyes bored into my comforting, warm eyes. He looked so helpless that I could not help but hug him and kiss the top of his head just to give him that extra safety. While I was frightened a little myself at the fact that Max’s father could move Max away or maybe even worse, I still put on a brave face for Max. Because he was never distressed by anything his father says.
“We’re in love Max, and nothing can stop us from being together.” My voice wavered slightly but I still convinced Max because he hugged me closer and sighed into my chest.
“Nothing can stop us.” I said more to myself then Max.
TBC
Chapter 29
It’s been a month since I moved out of home and into Michael’s place. And I couldn’t be happier. I feel so free. Max and I are together again and I’m finally getting the thinking space I deserve. For once my parents are respecting my wishes and have left me alone.
I finally feel normal again, aside from my pregnancy. I decided to talk with my principal last week and tell him my situation, I was excepting to be kicked out of school but Principal Forrester said he didn’t want to lose such a good student so he’s letting me graduate early. As long as my grades are up and I get enough credits I’ll be finished with high school within two months.
Max was behind this all the way saying my education was totally important, that’s why we’ve been helping each other study a little bit every now and then. At school my pregnancy will be kept under wraps except for certain teachers. I was sad I couldn’t graduate with my classmates but now I’m just happy I’m graduating.
Leaving my parent's house to just get away was the smartest thing I’ve done in a long time. While I’m still angry with them and not sure how I can fix this with them, I’m getting on with my life. I’ll be graduating in a couple of months, I’ve gone to my doctor’s appointments and everything looks fine. And Max and I are finally on track.
We’ve grown more over these last couple of months then we have in over a year. Max has been totally supportive about everything and comes to see me anytime he can.
In his very short lunch breaks from the UFO center where his worked for over a year, not that he really needs too because his parents are loaded but he says he does it to be more independent. He comes during those breaks and makes me lunch and brings me a big bag of the choc-chip cookies that I’ve been craving lately. Even with only fifty minutes he can make everything perfect.
Max sometimes comes in the middle of the night just so we can sleep in each other arms. Michael has now learned to leave a spare key outside so Max doesn’t have to break in again.
It’s strange but in ways we’re better then we were before. We listen to each other and don’t hold back what we think. We have almost healed a part of us I thought could never be mended, our friendship.
Our love was always there coated with misunderstandings and fear, but our friendship and trust had been broken. It’s not to say everything is fixed and perfect, because it isn’t.
I’m still worried about Tess; I’ve seen her occasionally talking to Max and giving him the eye. Thank god Max’s only responses so far have been a very cold shoulder. He screamed at her in the school hallways to fuck off and get out of his face last week. This earned him after school detention, but I couldn’t hide my smirk of happiness. I only wish I had been there to see her face and the millions of snickering students in the hallways. Thank god for Maria’s detailed accounts.
While Max and I still have to keep it under hush that we’re back together so his father and many ‘spies’ don’t find out, Max and I now have a secret location and messages as to where we can meet at school or just in general.
While the eraser room only worked for a week, we decided to find different areas to talk, eat together and of course make-out. My toes curl every time I think of our secret little make-out sessions under the bleachers, or in the Art supply room. My heart hammers at the thought of being caught but it just makes the whole thing much more exciting.
While we promise to take it slow we seem to forget every time when we come to something more then just kissing. Max usually takes a shower while I go drink something cold and splash my face with water.
Only lately a cold shower and a refreshing splash of water in the face aren’t working as well as we thought.
We know not to take it to the next level just yet, but it’s very hard to resist. We vowed not to do anything till we're good and ready, emotional and physically. Even when I think we’re totally ready now I mentally slap myself for taking that direction, I did that once and it turned out bad. Max and I were moments away from making love the other night that I began to manipulate Max into believing we were ready just for my own greedy pleasure. Luckily Max has incredibly will power and made me get a grip. That night he had wanted to tell me something, talk to me and all I could think about was tearing his clothes off as soon as he walked into the door.
What had stopped me most of all that night was that I had to talk to him as well; I had completely put aside something that had been plaguing me over this past month. The first night I moved into Michael’s apartment, I was shocked to see Max come running in with the most distressed look on his face.
He had clung to me for dear life and I had to calm him down just to be released from his rain-soaked embrace. I had asked him what was wrong but he just explained that he thought something had happened to me because I wasn’t at my house. I believed him, I still do, but I knew there was an underlining something else that he didn’t want to share with me.
Even that night after he helped me in my father’s study and found out the secret of my family he had come storming into Michael place like he was about to lose all control. I knew something happened with his father, but his demeanor was something I had never seen before. And it kinda scared me.
That’s what brought me to our secret place in Summerhaven Park, behind shrub and brush where it’s almost like a little tree hut. I wanted to ask Max now what had bothered him that night and what had happened between him and his father. It had to be something bad because he was hiding it from me.
“Whatcha thinking?” Max whisper behind me, in turn it made me jumped out of my skin.
“God, you scared me.” I held my heaving chest watching as he made his way over to me and crouched down to kiss me softly on the lips. As he started to pull away I grabbed his shirt and pulled him back.
Max collapsed to his knees surrendering to my deepening kiss; I let my tongue slide into his mouth several times. Delving a little further each time before pulling away, Max was completely blown away as he lingered in the same space with closed eyes as I pulled away from his face.
“What was that for?” He huskily whispered looking down at me with hooded amber eyes.
“Just for being you.” I smiled up at him, some times when we were together I got this upsetting feeling that I might lose him again. That was one of those moments.
“So what’s going on? I can tell there’s something on your mind.” He said after a few moments. He could still read me like an open book.
“Nothing, I was just wondering if your father has said anything to you lately?” I saw the colour slightly drain from his face before he turned his face away from me.
“Nothing, just the usual rants of how I shouldn’t pass the opportunity get somewhere in life, of course he's just talking about me taking over his job. And now ‘cause Isabel’s back from boarding school he's hammering me twice as much.” Max said rolling his eyes and then looking back to me.
“Can’t chose your family.” He stated with a lopsided smile and a shake of his head. I could see he was hiding something.
“Are you sure cause that night when you came rushing into the apartment dripping wet and thinking something happened to me, it kinda seemed like something else was going on.”
Max ducked his head and picked at the grass between us. He was obviously not telling me something, it screamed at me like a foghorn in my mind. Max and I had gotten so far over the past few weeks; I didn’t want to go back to where we just didn’t communicate.
“Max I know you're keeping something from me, and I don’t want to be in the dark about this thing you're obviously having with your father.” I placed my hand on his hand that was still picking at the grass.
“I’m not keeping any secrets from you.” He said continuing to avert his eyes.
“Then what’s wrong?” I shuffled closer to him. He merely shook his head and pressed his lips tightly together. At first I couldn’t see the tears roll down his face till he brought his eyes to mine.
“He said….that if I don’t stop seeing you’ll he’ll make sure I won’t have anyone to see in the end.” Max quavered, his bottom lip quivered slightly.
“That’s what he told me when I left you at Michael’s house and then went home. He threatened to move me to another school and he threatened…..”
“To get rid of me.” I finished off his sentence, feeling my body shake all over.
“Oh Max.” I murmured, seeing how distressed he was, I brought his body to mine and cradled his head on my chest.
It made sense Max wasn’t just being there for me at every minute, he was fearing something would happen to me. It was almost hard to grasp the fact that Mr. Evans would get rid of me, but what scared me most was what Mr. Evans was willing do to keep us apart.
“Max, I’m not going anyway. Okay?” I whispered reassuringly into the top of his head as I stroked his messy dark locks.
Max looked up at me and kissed me haphazardly; our lips softly caressed each other in slow burning ecstasy. And before I knew it I was laying on my back across the blanket we were sitting on and I was unbuttoning Max’s pants as he blindly unbuttoned mine.
It wasn’t fast it was sensual and slow. Time was moving at the right speed. It was like every moment every touch was expanding in ever growing pleasure and harmony. Max led heated trails of kisses down my neck and over my shoulders as I slid my hands under his shirt and ran my fingers over his defined torso.
Blindly we fondled with each others clothes not taking then entirely off but still baring enough so our bodies would come into contract. Max stopped kissing my neck to look down at my stomach.
My shirt had been pulled up exposing my now visible pregnancy, while it still wasn’t that big, it was still noticeable.
I watched in pure trembling delight as Max careful watched my tummy rise and fall with every breath. His boyish features were softened like he was look at something for the first time. Carefully with one hand he placed it on my stomach, running his fingers lightly over my skin. I arched a little at the tender contact, feeling my toes curl with yearning desire.
Max was unaware of my fidgeting with wanton desire, he was just running his fingers over my stomach making lazy circles with each touch.
He brought the tip of his nose to my belly then kissed it ever so softly. I heard him murmur something into my stomach, but I wasn’t too aware of what he was saying. All I was aware of was my twitching body craving his touch.
I felt him kiss my stomach again and then he brought his head up to mine for a deep kiss that set my head spinning. I recovered slightly and then looked up into his sparkling honey gold eyes. I hadn’t seen them look like that in a long time.
“What were you doing?” I whispered with a smile, my heart fluttering at his lopsided grin.
“Just talking to the baby.” He said with a smirk then brought his lips to mine again for another mind-blowing kiss, our tongues plunged and dueled with which other.
“About what?” I giggled into his mouth completely out of breathe.
“How much I love it and you. And how I will always be there for both of you not matter what.”
“Do you promise?” I was slightly serious when I asked and Max could tell it worried me that he might turn his back on me again.
“I promise.” He vowed looking so deep into my eyes that I could see into his soul and he could see into mine.
He sealed that promise with a kiss, a kiss that made my heart beat only for him. A kiss I will never forget, because it was the final kiss that mended us. A part of both of us was growing inside right now, an unspoken connection between us sparked as we held each other in this moment. We were beyond lovers and friends…we were family.
Things began to take another turn when we look into each others eyes and saw the heated stares that asked the question, were we gonna go that to that next level. Max looked down in question and I gave a slight nod as I slowly ran my hand down his stomach and into the waistband of his boxer's.
I stopped deliberately for one moment as I watched Max’s face contort with pleasure at my delicate touch. He looked at me again with pleading eyes as I started sliding my hand around his hardening member.
Max gasped at my touch as I started applying pressure and moving my hand. It was merely enough for me just to hear Max groaning in bliss. Max kissed my jaw line gasping when I ran my fingers over his head and resumed my pressured touch.
With yet another intensifying kiss Max combed his fingers through my hair. I felt a tingling sensation run through my spine as he slow traced one hand down my neck, over my chest and then up into my bra.
I arched my back in aching desire as he caressed my breast and then continued his trail down my torso and to my hip. Creeping his hands into the waistband of my panties I gasped at the contact so close yet so far.
Max teased me by running his hand down my thigh pulling my pants with them. I shivered when he slowly brought his hand up again and slide one finger into my center. My reaction to his touch was automatic and I needed him inside me then and there.
I pushed my hips towards his causing a friction with his constricted throbbing member. I quickly pulled down his boxers to free him. We touched every so slightly before Max drove into me with one deep thrust.
I pulled my body to his, clinging my legs around his hips, feeling this blinding indulgence that I had missed so much. Tears run down the sides of my face and collected in my ears from the pure joy and contentment of having Max touch me this way again. To have our bodies become one, to be together as lovers.
“Are you okay?” He asked stopping abruptly, his face was twisted with concern at the sight of my tears.
I nodded my head with a sweet smile, “I just miss having you inside me.”
“I love you.” Max huskily whispered into my ear and kissed my neck and cheek.
“I love you, Max.” I breathed bracing my arm around his neck and combing my fingers through his messy hair, preparing myself for his next thrust.
My body clenched with every movement, Max drove deeply every time and I felt this incredible feeling of being whole, like I had never felt before. Our relationship was beyond boyfriend and girlfriend, it was more than just lovers, it’s…us. We were becoming unified as a family, Mother, Father and child.
The feeling was electric and I know Max felt it too, I brought his lips to mine once again muffle my cries and moans as I felt myself coming close to the edge, my body was building at a mind-blowing rate. Max drove into me hard and faster as he too was close to release.
“Oh god……. Liz, Liz, Liz.” He chanted into my hot mouth
“Max!” I grasped out
Max looked into my eyes one more time before giving his last hard, deep thrust that made my body tremble with his as we came together shivering and grasping for air.
Max’s body collapsed onto top of mine as he both desperately tried to gain back our breath. After a few moments Max and I pulled and adjusted most of our clothing, Max then rolled beside me and stared down into my face. I still melt under those eyes.
“What?” I smiled up at him snuggling closer to his chest.
“You’re so beautiful.” I feel the biggest smile spread across my face at his comment.
“So are you.” I beamed up at him and slightly shivered from being cold and being so close to him.
“I don’t think I’ll ever stop loving you.” He hummed out with sparkling eyes then kissed my sweaty brow.
“Damn straight.” Max huffed out a laugh at my drolly relpy.
“You shivered before, you're cold.” Max quickly assumed holding me close and pulling down my top which was still exposing my stomach and showing a little of my lacey bra.
“Not really.” I smiled up to him, but he was in total protective mood to even notice. I grinned again with a soft “Really I’m okay.”
Max stopped fussing around to try and get me warmer “I just don’t want anything to happen to you.” He said in boyish innocence.
I framed his face with my hands, caressing his stubbly cheeks with my thumbs. “Nothing is ever gonna happen to me or the baby, I promise.”
Max looked serious, his frightened eyes bored into my comforting, warm eyes. He looked so helpless that I could not help but hug him and kiss the top of his head just to give him that extra safety. While I was frightened a little myself at the fact that Max’s father could move Max away or maybe even worse, I still put on a brave face for Max. Because he was never distressed by anything his father says.
“We’re in love Max, and nothing can stop us from being together.” My voice wavered slightly but I still convinced Max because he hugged me closer and sighed into my chest.
“Nothing can stop us.” I said more to myself then Max.
TBC
-
Hybrid-Angel
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 57
- Joined: Tue Dec 31, 2002 5:32 pm
- Location: A room with padded walls
Okay heres chapter 30....i won't talk i'll just let ya read.
Chapter 30
I felt the morning sun creep over my body as I lay half asleep on Michael's couch that I now call my bed. Every morning is the same I wake up with the thought of Max on my mind and I can’t help but smile every time.
Last week we had taken our relationship to the next level. I didn't realise how much I had missed it. But something was different this time in the way we made love. It made my heart flutter and my mind flip like never before. Before this whole chaos of our lives, sex was just sex, back then I thought it was fantastic but compared to then, now it's phenomenal. Like we’re really in tune with each other, that everything was more than just raging teenage hormones.
I roll over to my side still smiling as I turned towards the sunlight. The warmth felt much like Max’s, when it was near you tingled in delight and just want to have it encircle you.
I started to pull my blanket over the top half of my body but I stopped abruptly when I felt a little tug on my finger as I did so. Confused, I pulled my hand again getting the same response: a small tug on my left middle finger.
Sleepily I realised something thin was tied around the top of my middle finger. With blurred vision I looked down at my left hand, holding it up to study the long string attached to my finger in perplexity.
The string suddenly tightened. I sat up straight in bed and I looked along the line of thin string to see Max standing on the other side of the room near the door. He held the string tightly in one hand and walked a little closer into the light.
“What are you doing?” I laughed as Max continued to stay silent only a lopsided grin showing me he was up to something.
“Is this some invention to make me slap myself in the face at your command?” I smirked, yawning. Max merely shook his head.
“Then what is this?” I gestured to the string attracted to my finger.
Just as I finished that sentence a silver ring slid down the string and looped onto my finger. I beamed a bright smile and snapped fully awake. Max came eagerly to my side as I shone with pure joy over the gift and how it made its way to my finger.
“It’s a special commitment ring.” Max murmured softly in a sweet honey voice. He pushed the ring easily onto my finger turning it around to reveal it to be an Irish Claddagh ring. A heart held by two hands and a crown placed on top of the small heart.
“See in the middle is a heart to symbolize love, the center of everything; the crown symbolizes loyalty and the hands that hold everything together is friendship.” Max and I bumped foreheads as we looked at the ring.
“And when the point of the heart is pointing towards you…. it means you belong to somebody.” Max finished bringing his eyes to mine in a heartwarming stare.
“It’s beautiful, I’ll never take it off.” I vowed as tears blurred my vision.
“I wanted you to have something to remember us in this moment. As lovers…. and family.” My tears finally fell, but were whisked away quickly by Max’s thumb. Max grinned softly at my emotional state, my tears continued to fall and I was too caught up in them to even say a word. So I said what mattered most.
“I love you.” I blubbered which made Max laugh and then kiss my forehead loving and then the tip of my nose, “Right back at ya, babe.”
“Damn hormones.” I sniffed a teary laugh; Max just laughed again and pulled me into his chest for a tender embrace.
After a few moments I calmed down and was now just snuggling into Max’s arms as we lay under the covers. The place I loved the most in the world, nothing could compare to being in his gentle but strong hug.
Max held me close as I snuggled into his chest with a sigh of contentment. I felt completely at peace but I felt Max slightly tense up every now and then.
“What’s wrong?” I looked up to his face, he was staring blankly at the ceiling. He snapped out of his stare realizing I had asked him something.
“Huh?” He looked down at me, he was obviously distracted.
“You seem a little tense; I just wanted to know if something was bothering you?” I looked up to him with big, concerned eyes.
“Nah, nothing.” He said all too easily
“C’mon tell me.” I whined childishly, now turning on my stomach and crossing my arms on his chest giving him the big ol’ puppy dog eyes. “Pleeease.”
Max smiled at my effort and let his eyes drift off vacantly again “I was just thinking how I’m never going to forgive myself for everything I’ve done to you.”
I felt a pang of sorrow with my heart to see him in such pain, another pang filled my heart but it was guilt this time. He shouldn’t feel solely responsible for anything. I was the one who pushed him and was unfair. Equally I had had done my share of bad things as a friend and girlfriend.
“Max, we both have done some bad things but I share the blame too.”
“No, Liz you don’t even share half of what I did. It’s hard for me to believe that you’re still here loving me.”
“Max--” I sighed in sympathy
“I wish I could take it all back.”
“I don’t.” I said with a slowly shake of my head, Max looked at me in bewilderment.
“Max, if we hadn’t gone through all the shit we put each other through we wouldn’t be here. We wouldn’t have what we share now. We would not be as committed and as close as we are.” Max still looked unconvinced
“We wouldn’t have grown.” I continued softly, hoping he’d come around.
Max slowly nodded still lost in his thoughts and picking at the hem of his shirt. I decided to take another tactic by straddling his stomach and tickling him all over.
“Liz, stop!” Max giggled trying desperately to stop my hand from tickling the sides of his stomach.
“C’mon cut it out!” He snickered once more, now sitting upright as I straddle his lap both of us panting from our tickle fight.
I kissed Max softly and then framed his face with my hand smiling down at him.
“That’s the smile I was looking for.” I hummed out in a melted smile.
Max smiled back up at me and then cuddled into my chest with a sigh as I rested my chin on top of his head feeling my heart swell at every breath. I caressed the nape of Max’s neck and ran my fingers through his spiky hairline. I loved the feel of its fuzzy, softness run through my fingers.
“Hey, has the baby kicked yet?” Max said into my chest then finally looked up to me waiting for my reply. “I read that in the sixteenth week there should be movement, and you’re already in your eighteenth week.”
Max looked up at me with such boyish innocence I couldn’t help but smile at his question “No, not yet. But that’s normal for a first pregnancy.”
“Oh.” Max murmured sadly before placing a hand over my belly and rubbing it softly.
“I promise you’ll be the first to know when it happens.” I giggled finding his sadness so endearing.
“I hope I’ll be here to feel when it first happens.” Max pouted still tracing lazy circles over the slight bump in my stomach. I framed Max’s face and made his eyes look into mine.
“You will be here to feel it when it happens.” I vowed with a smile, which gave Max confidence that he would be here when the baby first kicks. “Whether it late at night or during the day, I’ll make sure you’ll be around.”
“Any other worries I should know about?” I laughed not expecting a frown to appear on Max’s face. My smile faded when Max averted his eyes from my stomach again.
“What if you don’t get through this pregnancy?” Max muttered apprehensively.
“What?” I looked at him perplexed, where was all this coming from?
“I mean with all the shit I put you through, all that stress you went through what if…. what if you don’t carry to term? I read all this stuff on the Internet about health and pregnancies and the effects stress can have and--”
“Max, Max! I’m fine. Nothing is going to happen, the doctor said everything is looking great and the only thing I need to worry about is putting on a little more weight. The baby is fine.” I spoke soothingly to Max; it seemed like he was having a panic attack. But why was it triggered now...Then it hit me.
“Has your father been saying all this too you?” Max could only answer by looking down from my face.
“Kinda.” He whispered.
“Oh Max.” I murmured bringing his head to my chest again in a protective hug. I kissed the top of his head cooing my reassurance that everything was fine and would be okay.
Not only was Max now being put down by his father but the man was bullying him too. I was starting to hate the man I once had a little respect for and I was wondering why the hell Diane Evans wasn’t stepping in and at least standing up for her only son. God it seemed like Isabel didn’t even have the balls to do it either. And she was labeled the Ice Princess when she went to our school.
After a few more moments of having Max's loving embrace I realised I was still in my PJ’s and had a bad case of bed hair. Max said I looked gorgeous just the same but I didn’t just wanna go on his perspective of me.
After a long shower, which ended up with Max joining me we emerged from the bathroom feeling refreshed and ready for the day, we made some breakfast and set off for another day at school.
Max dropped me off at the entrance while he went to park his jeep; this is where we normally go our separate ways till our next secret meeting. I kissed him and waved from the front entrance where students were moving into the building like they were going to a prisoner of war camp. But I all but skipped my way into the building to find Maria and show her the ring Max had given me earlier that morning.
“Hey Maria!” I jumped behind Maria making her squeal in fright. She slammed her locker and turned to face me with a knowing glance.
“Gee, you're chipper this morning.” She smiled looking me up and down. I looped my arm around hers as we strolled to our first class together.
“Look what he gave me.” I beamed with joy as I held up my hand showing her the ring.
“Ooo, pretty.” Maria held my hand examining the ring closely, “Is it really silver?”
“Yep.” I grinned wildly
“You’re so lucky.” Maria frowned “Michael's is so romantically handicapped.”
I laughed knowing that right now Michael was planning something for Maria’s up coming demo try-out in New York. A scout had seen her perform at Cow-patty’s and signed her up for a Demo deal. I couldn’t be happier for her because she had waited for something like this her whole life; she was born to sing. Michael is upset that he can’t go but is totally proud of her too.
“So the days are ticking by, you’ll be in New York this time next week signing up with a record company to become a rock star.” I spread my hands in front of me as if envisioning a billboard.
“I can see it now, ‘Maria Deluca World Wide Number One Rock Star’.”
“Ha! Yeah right. I’m not even sure I’m gonna go.”
“What! Maria you not serious.” The look in her eyes proved she was.
“Maria, of course you’re going why you wouldn’t?” I stopped her in the middle of the hallway.
“Because I’m worried about you.” Maria said while crossing her arms.
“Why is everyone so worried about me?” I asked in confusion
“I just have a feeling and I don’t wanna leave you alone here.” Maria whined her excuse, I didn’t know whether to slap her or hug her.
“Maria, you’re only saying this ‘cos you’re chickening out.”
“Hey, hey! Maria Deluca is no chicken.” Maria point her finger in my face, I gave her a ‘You gotta be kidding’ look.
“Okay, maybe just a little.” Maria confessed “But I do have a bad feeling.”
“There is no need to worry; I’ll have Max, Alex and Michael to look after me. It’s me who should be worried about you going to New York by yourself.”
“Phfft! I can take anything…plus I’ll be ushered around by a huge stretch limo.” Maria squealed in delight and I couldn’t help but squeal girlishly with her.
“Whoa! Whoa! No squealing till I’m prepared with ear muffs.” I turned around to see Alex walking towards us twisting his finger in his ear. Maria gave him a slap for his comment and I giggled just like old times.
And that what it felt like, the old days when the three of us would hang out laughing and hitting Alex for his many sarcastic comments.
“So I heard Isabel’s back in town.” Alex said too casually, yep it was definitely like the old days.
“Alex you’re like a moth to a flame at the mention or rumor of Isabel Evans.” Maria shook her head sadly.
“I thought going to Sweden changed your whole perspective on her?” I asked as we started walking down the hallway again.
“Hey, can’t a guy just start a conversation with a past crush without being grilled?” Maria and I stopped in our track and gave him a knowing look.
“Okay, okay. I just wanted to make sure.” Alex held his hands up in defeat. I rolled my eyes and laughed as we made our way into class.
“Hey Liz, do you know where Max is?” Alex asked before we stepped foot into Trig.
“Yeah, he dropped me off twenty minutes ago. Why?”
“Oh it’s just he was supposed to meet me ten minutes ago about the basketball try-outs. He must have forgot.” Alex said with a shrug, brushing it off as it just being an accident that he must have forgot to do.
But my mind started to race and my stomach churned because Max had told me he was going straight to see the guys about the try-outs. I know he didn’t forget.
TBC
Chapter 30
I felt the morning sun creep over my body as I lay half asleep on Michael's couch that I now call my bed. Every morning is the same I wake up with the thought of Max on my mind and I can’t help but smile every time.
Last week we had taken our relationship to the next level. I didn't realise how much I had missed it. But something was different this time in the way we made love. It made my heart flutter and my mind flip like never before. Before this whole chaos of our lives, sex was just sex, back then I thought it was fantastic but compared to then, now it's phenomenal. Like we’re really in tune with each other, that everything was more than just raging teenage hormones.
I roll over to my side still smiling as I turned towards the sunlight. The warmth felt much like Max’s, when it was near you tingled in delight and just want to have it encircle you.
I started to pull my blanket over the top half of my body but I stopped abruptly when I felt a little tug on my finger as I did so. Confused, I pulled my hand again getting the same response: a small tug on my left middle finger.
Sleepily I realised something thin was tied around the top of my middle finger. With blurred vision I looked down at my left hand, holding it up to study the long string attached to my finger in perplexity.
The string suddenly tightened. I sat up straight in bed and I looked along the line of thin string to see Max standing on the other side of the room near the door. He held the string tightly in one hand and walked a little closer into the light.
“What are you doing?” I laughed as Max continued to stay silent only a lopsided grin showing me he was up to something.
“Is this some invention to make me slap myself in the face at your command?” I smirked, yawning. Max merely shook his head.
“Then what is this?” I gestured to the string attracted to my finger.
Just as I finished that sentence a silver ring slid down the string and looped onto my finger. I beamed a bright smile and snapped fully awake. Max came eagerly to my side as I shone with pure joy over the gift and how it made its way to my finger.
“It’s a special commitment ring.” Max murmured softly in a sweet honey voice. He pushed the ring easily onto my finger turning it around to reveal it to be an Irish Claddagh ring. A heart held by two hands and a crown placed on top of the small heart.
“See in the middle is a heart to symbolize love, the center of everything; the crown symbolizes loyalty and the hands that hold everything together is friendship.” Max and I bumped foreheads as we looked at the ring.
“And when the point of the heart is pointing towards you…. it means you belong to somebody.” Max finished bringing his eyes to mine in a heartwarming stare.
“It’s beautiful, I’ll never take it off.” I vowed as tears blurred my vision.
“I wanted you to have something to remember us in this moment. As lovers…. and family.” My tears finally fell, but were whisked away quickly by Max’s thumb. Max grinned softly at my emotional state, my tears continued to fall and I was too caught up in them to even say a word. So I said what mattered most.
“I love you.” I blubbered which made Max laugh and then kiss my forehead loving and then the tip of my nose, “Right back at ya, babe.”
“Damn hormones.” I sniffed a teary laugh; Max just laughed again and pulled me into his chest for a tender embrace.
After a few moments I calmed down and was now just snuggling into Max’s arms as we lay under the covers. The place I loved the most in the world, nothing could compare to being in his gentle but strong hug.
Max held me close as I snuggled into his chest with a sigh of contentment. I felt completely at peace but I felt Max slightly tense up every now and then.
“What’s wrong?” I looked up to his face, he was staring blankly at the ceiling. He snapped out of his stare realizing I had asked him something.
“Huh?” He looked down at me, he was obviously distracted.
“You seem a little tense; I just wanted to know if something was bothering you?” I looked up to him with big, concerned eyes.
“Nah, nothing.” He said all too easily
“C’mon tell me.” I whined childishly, now turning on my stomach and crossing my arms on his chest giving him the big ol’ puppy dog eyes. “Pleeease.”
Max smiled at my effort and let his eyes drift off vacantly again “I was just thinking how I’m never going to forgive myself for everything I’ve done to you.”
I felt a pang of sorrow with my heart to see him in such pain, another pang filled my heart but it was guilt this time. He shouldn’t feel solely responsible for anything. I was the one who pushed him and was unfair. Equally I had had done my share of bad things as a friend and girlfriend.
“Max, we both have done some bad things but I share the blame too.”
“No, Liz you don’t even share half of what I did. It’s hard for me to believe that you’re still here loving me.”
“Max--” I sighed in sympathy
“I wish I could take it all back.”
“I don’t.” I said with a slowly shake of my head, Max looked at me in bewilderment.
“Max, if we hadn’t gone through all the shit we put each other through we wouldn’t be here. We wouldn’t have what we share now. We would not be as committed and as close as we are.” Max still looked unconvinced
“We wouldn’t have grown.” I continued softly, hoping he’d come around.
Max slowly nodded still lost in his thoughts and picking at the hem of his shirt. I decided to take another tactic by straddling his stomach and tickling him all over.
“Liz, stop!” Max giggled trying desperately to stop my hand from tickling the sides of his stomach.
“C’mon cut it out!” He snickered once more, now sitting upright as I straddle his lap both of us panting from our tickle fight.
I kissed Max softly and then framed his face with my hand smiling down at him.
“That’s the smile I was looking for.” I hummed out in a melted smile.
Max smiled back up at me and then cuddled into my chest with a sigh as I rested my chin on top of his head feeling my heart swell at every breath. I caressed the nape of Max’s neck and ran my fingers through his spiky hairline. I loved the feel of its fuzzy, softness run through my fingers.
“Hey, has the baby kicked yet?” Max said into my chest then finally looked up to me waiting for my reply. “I read that in the sixteenth week there should be movement, and you’re already in your eighteenth week.”
Max looked up at me with such boyish innocence I couldn’t help but smile at his question “No, not yet. But that’s normal for a first pregnancy.”
“Oh.” Max murmured sadly before placing a hand over my belly and rubbing it softly.
“I promise you’ll be the first to know when it happens.” I giggled finding his sadness so endearing.
“I hope I’ll be here to feel when it first happens.” Max pouted still tracing lazy circles over the slight bump in my stomach. I framed Max’s face and made his eyes look into mine.
“You will be here to feel it when it happens.” I vowed with a smile, which gave Max confidence that he would be here when the baby first kicks. “Whether it late at night or during the day, I’ll make sure you’ll be around.”
“Any other worries I should know about?” I laughed not expecting a frown to appear on Max’s face. My smile faded when Max averted his eyes from my stomach again.
“What if you don’t get through this pregnancy?” Max muttered apprehensively.
“What?” I looked at him perplexed, where was all this coming from?
“I mean with all the shit I put you through, all that stress you went through what if…. what if you don’t carry to term? I read all this stuff on the Internet about health and pregnancies and the effects stress can have and--”
“Max, Max! I’m fine. Nothing is going to happen, the doctor said everything is looking great and the only thing I need to worry about is putting on a little more weight. The baby is fine.” I spoke soothingly to Max; it seemed like he was having a panic attack. But why was it triggered now...Then it hit me.
“Has your father been saying all this too you?” Max could only answer by looking down from my face.
“Kinda.” He whispered.
“Oh Max.” I murmured bringing his head to my chest again in a protective hug. I kissed the top of his head cooing my reassurance that everything was fine and would be okay.
Not only was Max now being put down by his father but the man was bullying him too. I was starting to hate the man I once had a little respect for and I was wondering why the hell Diane Evans wasn’t stepping in and at least standing up for her only son. God it seemed like Isabel didn’t even have the balls to do it either. And she was labeled the Ice Princess when she went to our school.
After a few more moments of having Max's loving embrace I realised I was still in my PJ’s and had a bad case of bed hair. Max said I looked gorgeous just the same but I didn’t just wanna go on his perspective of me.
After a long shower, which ended up with Max joining me we emerged from the bathroom feeling refreshed and ready for the day, we made some breakfast and set off for another day at school.
Max dropped me off at the entrance while he went to park his jeep; this is where we normally go our separate ways till our next secret meeting. I kissed him and waved from the front entrance where students were moving into the building like they were going to a prisoner of war camp. But I all but skipped my way into the building to find Maria and show her the ring Max had given me earlier that morning.
“Hey Maria!” I jumped behind Maria making her squeal in fright. She slammed her locker and turned to face me with a knowing glance.
“Gee, you're chipper this morning.” She smiled looking me up and down. I looped my arm around hers as we strolled to our first class together.
“Look what he gave me.” I beamed with joy as I held up my hand showing her the ring.
“Ooo, pretty.” Maria held my hand examining the ring closely, “Is it really silver?”
“Yep.” I grinned wildly
“You’re so lucky.” Maria frowned “Michael's is so romantically handicapped.”
I laughed knowing that right now Michael was planning something for Maria’s up coming demo try-out in New York. A scout had seen her perform at Cow-patty’s and signed her up for a Demo deal. I couldn’t be happier for her because she had waited for something like this her whole life; she was born to sing. Michael is upset that he can’t go but is totally proud of her too.
“So the days are ticking by, you’ll be in New York this time next week signing up with a record company to become a rock star.” I spread my hands in front of me as if envisioning a billboard.
“I can see it now, ‘Maria Deluca World Wide Number One Rock Star’.”
“Ha! Yeah right. I’m not even sure I’m gonna go.”
“What! Maria you not serious.” The look in her eyes proved she was.
“Maria, of course you’re going why you wouldn’t?” I stopped her in the middle of the hallway.
“Because I’m worried about you.” Maria said while crossing her arms.
“Why is everyone so worried about me?” I asked in confusion
“I just have a feeling and I don’t wanna leave you alone here.” Maria whined her excuse, I didn’t know whether to slap her or hug her.
“Maria, you’re only saying this ‘cos you’re chickening out.”
“Hey, hey! Maria Deluca is no chicken.” Maria point her finger in my face, I gave her a ‘You gotta be kidding’ look.
“Okay, maybe just a little.” Maria confessed “But I do have a bad feeling.”
“There is no need to worry; I’ll have Max, Alex and Michael to look after me. It’s me who should be worried about you going to New York by yourself.”
“Phfft! I can take anything…plus I’ll be ushered around by a huge stretch limo.” Maria squealed in delight and I couldn’t help but squeal girlishly with her.
“Whoa! Whoa! No squealing till I’m prepared with ear muffs.” I turned around to see Alex walking towards us twisting his finger in his ear. Maria gave him a slap for his comment and I giggled just like old times.
And that what it felt like, the old days when the three of us would hang out laughing and hitting Alex for his many sarcastic comments.
“So I heard Isabel’s back in town.” Alex said too casually, yep it was definitely like the old days.
“Alex you’re like a moth to a flame at the mention or rumor of Isabel Evans.” Maria shook her head sadly.
“I thought going to Sweden changed your whole perspective on her?” I asked as we started walking down the hallway again.
“Hey, can’t a guy just start a conversation with a past crush without being grilled?” Maria and I stopped in our track and gave him a knowing look.
“Okay, okay. I just wanted to make sure.” Alex held his hands up in defeat. I rolled my eyes and laughed as we made our way into class.
“Hey Liz, do you know where Max is?” Alex asked before we stepped foot into Trig.
“Yeah, he dropped me off twenty minutes ago. Why?”
“Oh it’s just he was supposed to meet me ten minutes ago about the basketball try-outs. He must have forgot.” Alex said with a shrug, brushing it off as it just being an accident that he must have forgot to do.
But my mind started to race and my stomach churned because Max had told me he was going straight to see the guys about the try-outs. I know he didn’t forget.
TBC