Control (AU without A, M/L, Mature) Chapter Six 02/06/25

[Stefuh]

Title : Control
Category : Alien Abyss (angst), AU without Aliens.
Rating : Mature
Pairing : M/L
Disclaimer : I do not own Roswell nor the characters, those belong to Jason Katims, Melinda Metz, WB, and UPN.
Summary : Liz has finally landed the part she was waiting for, but with it, she'll discover that her life in Los Angeles won't be as perfect as she had previously hoped...
Trigger Warning : Eating Disorder, Anorexia, Bulimia, Self-Loathing... Depression maybe.
A/N : English isn't my first language and Control is my first Roswell story, so please be nice! I don't have a beta, so if anyone notices any error, you can tell me! The prologue is short, but the chapters will be longer.

Prologue

2001

Liz dry-heaved one last time into the toilet bowl and then froze as she opened her eyes... Her respiration started to grow shallow as an anxiety attack seized her small body.

Blood.

There had never been blood before.

Feeling the tears slide down her face both from the vomiting and the anxiety, she quickly flushed down the spoiled water, wishing the guilt to go away with it, as she got to her feet, trembling.

At the same time, the door from the ladies' bathroom opened, and Liz closed her eyes, making herself feel smaller in the stall, hoping no one had heard her, or that it wasn't Maria, Sofia or even Max...

She let a sigh of relief pass her lips as she heard a customer or employee from the burger joint enter the stall next to her. She quickly opened the door before she made her way to the sink, rinsing her mouth and splashing some water on her face, hoping it would erase the tears along with her sullen expression.

The fake smile she put on didn't reach the brunette's eyes, but she knew that she would be able to rectify it back in front of the cameras after lunch break. Liz popped a mint into her mouth, sucking on it as the fresh taste invaded her mouth.

She couldn't let the sight of the blood worry her, not now... She had to get back to work, back to pretending everything was fine.

[keepsmiling7]

Can't wait to see where this goes.....
Thanks for bringing us a new story!

[Stefuh]

Thank you keepsmiling7 for reading! I'm truly sorry that it took me so long to write the first chapter, a lot of things happened after I put up the prologue... I promise I'll post the next chapter sooner!


Chapter One

1993

"I want to be an actress."

Nancy blinked as her nine year old daughter appeared in the kitchen in her pink nightgown covered with small white bunnies.

"Aren't you supposed to be in bed, miss Parker?"

"I'm serious, mom, we need to find out if anyone is recruiting for a nine year old girl!"

Liz's mom let go of the papers she was looking at as she put her reading glasses down on the table next to her cup of tea.

"Where is this coming from? I thought you wanted to study science."

At an early age, her daughter had spoken about going to Harvard to study biology and science. Liz's parents had no idea where she had picked that idea from, since they were the owner of a Café, but had guessed a teacher must have impressed her at school.

"Maria is already doing singing contests and she is my age-"

Nancy frowned, "Isn't Maria your new friend at school?"

"Yes, and she has such a beautiful voice! I want to act in movies where she'll sing the theme song!"

The mother sighed, finally understanding where her daughter was coming from. "Liz... I know you won't believe me, but this is just a phase you're going through. Since you're seeing your friend Maria trying to be a star, you want to do the same."

"But mom, I really want to act, I'm sure I'd be good at it, I can make myself cry on command and I have a really good memory to remember the script!" said the nine years old, smiling.

Nancy smiled at her little girl, her eyes were so huge in excitement. "I'll tell you what... If on your 10th birthday, you still want to act, we'll search for an audition."

"But that's in ten months!"

"That's all I can do for you... Now go back to bed, you have school tomorrow."

And with her lip pouting, Liz did as she was told.

*

2000

Liz screamed in pure joy after she hung up the phone, jumping up and down as her best friend, Maria, did the same next to her.

"You got it? You got the part?"

"Yes! My own TV show, can you believe it?"

The young girl, now seventeen years old, had managed to wait until her ten year old birthday before she began taking acting classes. Her mom had seen to it that it hadn't just been a phase after all and that her baby girl truly wanted to be an actress, so she had made sure that Liz wouldn't regret her choice.

"You just need to promise me one thing... Even if you become a big star tomorrow, I want you to still go to school and study hard. You're a bright young girl, and I know you'll go far in life, as an actress or as a scientist... but you need a plan B in case Hollywood isn't for you."

Liz smiled, school had never been a problem for her, and she was certain she could juggle both acting and schoolwork.

"I promise, mom."

She had had difficulties landing a role at first, but had managed to do commercials here and there, before an agency had recruited her at thirteen years old. Her manager, Sofia, had told her she could see potential in the young girl, and she had found a couple of roles for Liz to star in, mostly guest appearances on TV shows and TV movies... but last week, Liz had auditioned for the lead role in a new comedy series, which would tell the story of Jessica, a fifteen years old who had to move in with her aunt, uncle and cousin in Florida after her parents had to move away for work.

It sounded cliché, but Liz couldn't care at all.

"And guess what?" Liz added, after she had stopped jumping. "They don't have a theme song yet!"

"Oh my God! Are you going to recommend me to Sofia?"

"Of course I will, you're my best friend, Ria, how long have we waited for this moment?"

And as a shrill escaped Maria's lips once more, Maria's mother appeared in Liz's bedroom, frowning. "Girls! What is all this screaming so early in the morning?"

"Liz scored Sunkissed!!"

Amy screamed as well, joining her daughter and Liz in jumping up and down.

As Liz had began to get more and more roles on the small screen, Nancy and Jeff had agreed that it would be best for their daughter if she moved near Hollywood, after all, if she wanted to make the auditions, the six hour flight between Roswell and Los Angeles could be done, but it had it's restrictions. Since Liz's parents couldn't leave the CrashDown Café, Amy had suggested that she come live with her and Maria in L.A. Liz would have the same personal tutor as Maria so they could both finish High School (with, Nancy hoped, honor for Liz) in a prestigious school in Beverly Hills, and Amy could supervise Liz so her parents wouldn't be worried.

At first, it had taken a lot of convincing on Nancy's part, but she had finally agreed, Liz was over the moon at the thought that she would be living in Los Angeles and under the same roof as her best friend.

"Have you told your parents yet?" Asked Amy, and Liz shook her head. "Better tell them the good news in person! How about a trip to Roswell this weekend?" She frowned, "When are you due on set?"

"Next week, Sofia is going to send me the script for the first episode right away."

"Wonderful! Maria will be able to help you with your lines."

"Oh and, Amy? Maria will totally sing the opening song for Sunkissed, I promise you we'll make it happen."

Amy smiled at her daughter and her friend, before she hugged them close to her.

"I'm proud of you, both of you. I can't wait to see where this new adventure will lead us! Now, hurry and go pack, as soon as Sofia delivers you the script and the info on the show, we're out of here!"

*

Sofia had made her appearance twenty minutes later, so the trio had departed thirty minutes after. Liz couldn't help but flip through the script to see how many lines she had, the audition had only covered two scenes and she was certain there would be changes made at the last minute. A shiver ran down her spine and she smiled, turning toward Maria.

"Sofia said you should send a demo tape of the theme song, she left a demo they already had for another TV show, they want something similar."

"I'll listen to it tonight! Oh, Liz, I can't wait to meet the other actors, especially Isabel Evans, God, can you believe such a popular actress will play beside you?"

Liz squinted her eyes, trying to remember who she was. "I don't think I know her..."

Maria gaped at her best friend, taking the script out of her hands and turning toward the first page which listed the cast and crew. "She's going to play your cousin, Heather, how can you not know who she is, she's this tall, blonde, up and coming actress-"

The young woman continued to talk, but Liz stopped listening after "tall" and "blonde"... She had to become a better actress than this girl, otherwise, the attention of the audience would surely be on Miss Evans and not her. Liz shook her head, she knew it was wrong to think that way, but it was her first leading role and she wanted to make sure the producer wouldn't want to decide to focus on Heather instead of Liz's role, Jessica.

"I'm going to learn my lines so well, I'll impress them." murmured Liz as she took the script back from Maria's hands, studying the first page, trying to process how she would play the role.

They must have loved what she had done at the audition, but this was just a small part of Jessica's personality, Liz had to flesh her out, give her life, and be sure that she wouldn't be two dimensional. Even if the script turned toward this direction, Liz promised herself that should ask to make changes if she could.

"You look so serious," Maria said, smiling at her best friend before she took Liz's hand in her. "I'm really proud of you, Liz. We'll look back at this moment later in life, remembering how happy and excited we were at our beginning."

Liz smiled brightly, forgetting everything about Isabel Evans. "True, it's time to realize our dreams, Maria."

*

The young woman was so happy to be standing in front of her parent's café. She hadn't been in Roswell in a couple of months and she missed both her parents and their workplace, she had so many childhood memories here. It was evening time and it looked like it was a slow night at the CrashDown as she made her way in, followed by Maria - they both knew that the Parkers would agree to let her stay with their daughter for the weekend, and Amy had told them that she would be back tomorrow morning to have a chat with Nancy and Jeff. As Liz saw her dad behind the counter, counting the money in the cash register, her eyes welled with tears as she knew that her parents would be proud that she finally had found a leading part. As they entered, Jeff looked up from the register and his eyes widened at the sight of his daughter before a smile appeared on his face. "Liz!" He put the cash back in and went to the young woman, hugging her tightly. "What are you doing here?" He asked, before he said hello to Maria.

"Well... I have something to tell you, but I want mom to be there too!"

Seeing the joy in Liz's eyes, he nodded. "Alright, I'll warn Carrie to take over closing the café and we'll go up to see your mother."

As Jeff made his way to the waitress, Liz turned to Maria. "I want us to listen to that demo tonight," she said to her best friend. "I'm inspired right now and I'm sure we can come up with the right lyrics for the song."

Maria felt a shiver of anticipation run down her spine as she tried not to giggle, she was so happy to finally have the opportunity to sing a theme song! Of course, her dream was to go on tours and make CDs that people would love to listen to, but it had also been a dream of her to work on a project with Liz.

"Yes! I'm inspired too."

"Alright, let's go." Jeff said and the two girls followed him into the apartment.

Liz first went to her bedroom with Maria so they could put their stuff in there while Jeff went to search for his wife. After Nancy had hugged her daughter tightly and they had all sat in the living room, Liz finally delivered the news.

"I landed a leading part in a new TV show called Sunkissed! We start filming next week!"

Her mom gasped as Jeff got up and went to hug his daughter.

"Wow, Liz, that's amazing!" He announced and as Liz looked back to her mom, she saw that she had tears in her eyes as she looked proudly at her daughter.

"I always knew you could do it." Nancy said, before she went to sit on the couch with the rest of her family.

"Thanks, mom, thanks, dad..." Liz said. "And Maria will hopefully sing the song... We have to start right away and practice!" She announced, but her mom stopped her from getting up and sprinting to her room.

"After dinner, girls..." Nancy said and Liz reluctantly agreed.

She had missed her parents' cooking but she was too hyped right now to eat... but after all, the girls would be able to think more clearly with their stomachs full.

"Alright, mom, but after that, don't interrupt us, this is as important to me as it is for you that I succeed in school."

Nancy smiled, she couldn't agree more, but at the same time, she was beginning to think that acting was truly her daughter's calling and that she wouldn't really need her degree in biology after all. All that mattered to her was that Liz was happy with whatever she chose to do with her life.

[keepsmiling7]

Welcome back, I was hoping you'd come back and work on this story.
Nine year old Liz really did have big plans, along with her friend Maria.
It's always good to study hard in school just in case plan B is needed.
Lucky arrangement with Amy and Maria in LA.
Looking forward to more.

[Stefuh]

Thank you keepsmiling7! Here's the next chapter. Sorry, it's a bit boring, it's just to introduce the story a bit, but don't worry, Max will come along soon.

Chapter Two

Liz was looking at the first scene they were going to do. It had felt so surreal to finally be on the set and to see every decors – and more – that she had only read some lines so far. It had been strange to go into her character's room and to know that she would spend more time here than in her room back home in Roswell for at least a year. For now, if it wasn't canceled, Sunkissed already had two seasons ordered since the WB had liked the story so much. They would be filming the seasons back to back so Liz already knew she wouldn't see much of Roswell this year. She would miss her hometown, but she was too excited about the opportunity that she had been granted.

“So, how do you like it so far?” Liz turned around to see Jenna, the producer of the show, and the young woman smiled at her.

“I love it, it's so colorful and bright here.”

It was such a contrast to her home which was more warm and comfy. When she was around twelve, she had realized that she didn't want to be an actress only because she wanted the life Maria had, but because she wanted to get away from her hometown. She had always had big dreams that included going away from Roswell, and to see something else, see the world. L.A., and what she was about to embark into, sure gave her this feeling of grandiose she had been missing.

Jenna looked around. “It's exactly what I had in mind when I pictured Jessica's room and I'm glad the interior designers were able to reproduce my ideas so perfectly. Do you want to see the other rooms?”

Liz nodded before she followed the producer into the other rooms of the set.

“We will only be filming indoors this week since there's a lot of rain forecasted until next monday, so you'll see the exterior then.”

“It's great!” Liz said. “Are the other actors here?” She asked.

“Yes, Isabel and Steve are in the conference room because they wanted to practice their lines together, do you want to join them?”

“Yes, I'd like to know what it's like to be with the others before we start filming.”

Jenna smiled at her and directed the young woman to follow her. Liz's heart began to thump against her ribcage, she was finally going to meet Isabel Evans. Steve was the actor who played Will, her uncle. There was a grander cast, but the main characters would be Jessica, Heather, Will, Christine, and Heather's boyfriend, Ian.

“I just want to warn you, Liz, that this show is centered around Jessica's character. And since you were only giving the script for the pilot episode, I want to sit with you and talk about what your character is going to go through. I know the WB ordered two seasons, but they still need to see the pilot before anything else. We did give them a test-pilot with a different Jessica, but it just didn't work out.”

So I was a second choice? Liz wondered. She hadn't been made aware of that. Of course, she knew how the channels ordered their shows, but she had just thought Jenna and the crew had had connections that had given them the greenlight without a test pilot. “Can I see it?”

Jenna turned to her and smiled. “Only after we're done shooting the first episode. I want it done your way, I don't want you to compare yourself to someone else, okay?”

“Alright.”

She was suddenly feeling even more nervous. What if she screwed up and they had to replace her too?

“Here we are. Get to know each other, but not for long because you'll have to go through hair and makeup. Then we'll start shooting the two scenes we talked about, and after that I'll see you about Jess's journey.”

Liz nodded and her eyes scanned the room before they landed on the two actors sitting at a long table, talking. When Jenna had said 'conference room', Liz had thought about a long mahogany table, just like she had seen in the movies in offices job, but the place was mostly white, with some splashes of colors here and there. She let out a sigh of relief, this place was more calming than she thought.

“Liz Parker?” Steve asked, and Liz smiled at him and Isabel before making her way to the table.

“Hi, nice to meet you,” she said to both of them before she sat down at the table. “Were you practicing for the scene?”

“Yes,” answered Isabel before she looked at Liz. “Is this your first TV show?”

Liz couldn't help but blush at this, she didn't like to feel like the new kid. “Yes... you have to start somewhere, after all.”

She tried to give herself confidence but even her voice felt flat. Damn, why did Isabel made her feel so nervous?

“Don't worry, it's gonna be great!” Steve replied, smiling. “Why don't we practice a bit together? Sean should be here soon.”

“Sean?” She asked.

“Ian,” Isabel replied. “They just made their choice for the actor before today.”

She remembered not having seen anyone listed for Heather's boyfriend, but she had only thought it had been a typo. So she wouldn't be the only one who hadn't filmed the test pilot with the other cast members, that was a relief.

“Why don't we start with the bathroom scene, since it involves the three of us...” Isabel stated and Liz agreed.

It was about Jess's first day at school and how Heather thought she was using the bathroom for too long and how Jess's uncle was calming them down. Like Liz had thought before, very cliché stuff, but if everyone liked it, she wouldn't complain, unless it made her character look bad. She was about to ask if they could make changes to the script but decided to shut up instead. She didn't want to look like she was demanding too much in front of the others, and truthfully that was more a question that she should ask Jenna. The young woman would ask her later, during their meeting.

Time went by quickly as they practiced, and Liz felt immediately comfortable with how the others acted. She couldn't help but smile at the fact that maybe the shooting would go smoothly after all. She was quickly called in for her hair and makeup setup.

“See you on set.” Isabel said, and Liz smiled at her.

She had been nervous for nothing after all.

*

They had decided to let her hair straight for the first scene, and she was wearing light makeup which accentuated her brown eyes. Liz had been overly satisfied with it, she knew that since Jessica was the main character, she wouldn't be overwhelmed by her makeup, hair and clothes, and Liz preferred it that way. She had a light purple sweater on with a long skirt – also purple, but a darker one. She had a small silver necklace with a gemstone on it, and a bracelet to match with it. Her feet were in flat wooden sandals, and she liked how she looked. Purple wasn't a color she wore often, but it matched the image she had of Jessica in her head. She would also be sporting a backpack and a white coat since she was supposed to go to school.

She reread the scene once and for all before going onto the set where everyone was waiting. She saw that Sean had arrived, and Liz had to squint, because he had a familiar air, but she couldn't place where she could have seen him before.

“Alright everyone, we'll start at the beginning of the scene,” the director announced. “Try to make it flow naturally. You can make it your own, but please stay on the marks we gave you. Ready? Action!”

Liz walked into the room feeling quite confident, as her first line went smoothly past her lips. “Stop knocking on the door Heather, I won't go faster because you do so!”

There were a couple of mistakes here and there, whether it was about people's lines or how they acted, but otherwise, her first day flew right by.

“And cut! That's a wrap for the day, everyone! Same time tomorrow morning!” the director announced, before everyone started clapping and cheering.

Liz smiled brightly before she turned to her coworkers. “That was amazing, guys.”

They chatted as they exited the scene and Liz saw Maria standing close to the conference room. “Oh, hey Ma-”

“Maria! What are you doing here?” Sean said as he walked toward the blonde girl, hugging her, and Liz frowned.

“Sean?? I should be asking that question-” Maria asked, her eyes wide as she looked at Liz's coworker with what looked like surprise in her eyes.

“I'm in the show.” He simply stated.

“What-Who do you play? I don't remember seeing your name.”

“Heather's boyfriend.”

Liz blinked a couple of times before Maria finally refocused on her. “Oh, Liz, this is Sean, my cousin.”

“What?” She said, surprised to learn that Maria had another talented person in her family. Except for Maria's mom, Amy, Liz didn't know any other of her best friend's relatives... So that's why he had seemed familiar, and looking at them both, she could see some resemblances. “Why didn't you tell me before that your cousin was an actor?”

“Because I didn't know!” She stated, looking back at Sean. “Well, we'll definitely have to talk later. I'm busy right now.” She turned to Liz. “So? What did Jenna say about my song?”

“Oh! We didn't have time to talk about it but I have to meet her right now, why don't you come with me?”

Maria acquiesced and the two girls intertwined their arms before they walked toward Jenna's office, as the blonde girl asked her best friend how her first day had been, and with details.

“I really love it, Maria... I mean, I know I've wanted to be an actress because your world fascinates me, and my logical brain tells me it's not a reason to change your plans so drastically, but... I feel great about all of this, like I'm finally where I'm supposed to be.”

“Well, I'm glad you found your calling, chica, you see, we'll have a great year together! I have an audition in a week to entertain a restaurant, and while it's not what I would prefer, it's still something and I feel like it will lead me towards my dream! If I can sing the theme song of Sunkissed, it'll be even better.”

“I never thought we'd both in L.A. at sixteen,” Liz smiled. “I can't wait to see where it will take us!”

They ended their talk as they walked in front of Jenna's office, and Liz knocked on the door.

“Come in!”

Liz opened the door and smiled at her producer. “It's me, if you don't mind, I brought a friend, Maria DeLuca.”

Jenna's eyes widened and she smiled at them. “Oh, yes, the demo tape, I did want to talk to you about that too! Please, sit down, both of you.”

As soon as Maria sat down, she began to babble about how if they didn't like her song, she could modify it to fit the show, but Jenna laughed and cut her off.

“No, we don't need any change for it, well maybe one or two lyrics, but otherwise, it's perfect for the show! Of course, we're going to record a proper version, but you nailed it, Maria.”

The young woman froze at that and Liz smiled. “I knew they would choose you!!” She said before she embraced her best friend and Maria finally smiled too.

“Oh my God, thank you so much, I swear you won't regret it, I'll perform my best for the official song!”

“I'm sure you will.” Jenna said before turning to Liz. “Now, Liz, about Jessica's journey...”

[keepsmiling7]

This is going to be an interesting journey for Liz and Maria even though Liz was second choice for the Jessica character.
Now Sean has arrived.....wonder how this will turn out?
Thanks for the new part.

[Stefuh]

I'm so sorry I haven't updated in a while, life got in the way... Here's a short chapter.

Chapter Three

“What about going to Eclectic tonight?” Sean asked the group, and Liz frowned.

“The club?” Isabel asked.

Oh, of course they would want to party after their week of shooting. The week had gone by really fast and Liz was beginning to get accustomed to her new job, and well, she really liked it. It was different than what she had imagined, but she was finally happy that she had decided to go down this path in her life. It was really a dream come true. She only hoped that it would continue after the show ended.

Liz had never been a big drinker, she had tried it once or twice, but her and her friends had never really been into it.

“Well, we should eat first.” The blonde woman added, and Liz nodded.

A part of her wanted to ditch the group and go back to Amy's place, but she didn't want to be left out of the cast, especially since everything had been going well this week.

“Can I invite Maria?” Liz asked Sean.

“Of course!”

Liz took this chance to get away and to get to the phone that was available to the group as she dialed Maria's number.

“A club? Who are you and what have you done with my best friend?”

Liz rolled her eyes. “Come on, Ria, I only want one drink, just to loosen up a bit, it's been a stressful week... plus, I just want to hang with everyone.” She looked back at her co-stars. “I guess underage drinking in L.A. isn't that uncommon, huh?”

Maria laughed at that. “Only if you knew... God, if Alex learns about this he will freak out.”

“Well... just don't tell him. We'll tell him after, it's only going to be one drink after all. We're all going to eat before, do you want to join us?”

“Alright, only so I can keep an eye on you.” Liz rolled her eyes at that before she smiled. “See you later, bestie.”

They had decided to go to a bar-grill to eat first, and Liz had to say that she was impressed with the place. She had thought it would have looked like any other place she had seen before, but this one was in fact, chic and glamorous. She was underdressed for this, but so was Sean. Only him, Liz, Isabel and Maria had made it.

Of course, her best friend had made sure to dress to the nine, before she turned to whisper to Liz. “I have another dress in my bag if you want it. It's red, it'll suit you perfectly.”

“I-” It was all so new to her.

“And makeup. Let's go to the bathroom.”

“My brother will join us at the club.” Isabel added as she sipped her martini. “He goes there often, so he'll get us in without a problem.”

“Great!” said Sean, just as his cousin and Liz got up.

“We'll be right back.” Maria said. “I've never been to Eclectic before,” She said as they walked into the bathroom. “But I know what kind of place it is, believe me, it's far from being trashy or normal, you'll be glad to be in a dress and some heels.”

“You brought heels too?” Liz asked, impressed.

“Of course, who do you think I am?” She said as she took the dress, which was neatly packed in her bag, with the heels. Thank God for big handbags. “Now go change and I'll do your makeup after.”

Liz smiled and raised an eyebrow. “You think we'll meet a couple of great guys there?”

“Well, if Isabel's brother is as good looking as she is, and I hope he has some friends! Better be prepared.”

Liz laughed before she shook her head and went into the stall to put the dress on. “Oh, it's short-” She stated, before she came out with the glittery satin red dress and the black heels on.

“And it fits you perfectly, just like I thought. Now come here, we don't want to let Sean and Isabel wait before we get going.” She said, as she went to Liz to apply some eyeshadows, eyeliner, mascara, blush and lipgloss on. “You look perfect, chica.” Maria stated as she looked back at her work. “Now, let's go party.”

*

Liz hoped that the salad and chicken she had eaten at the restaurant would help her to keep her drinks down. Of course, the one drink had soon become two... She had almost ordered a burger but had been intimidated by Isabel's healthy choice and had followed her lead instead. She had been so nervous after a while that she hadn't even been able to finish her plate, even though the food had been delicious.

“Where's your brother?” Maria screamed over the music at Isabel.

“He should be around somewhere.” She stated.

They had been able to get in because Isabel's brother, Max Evans, had asked the bodyguard to put his sister’s name on the guest list but he hadn't made his appearance yet. Since then, they had gotten a table and Sean had ordered a round of shooters and drinks for everyone.

Liz was now on her second cranberry vodka and had taken two shots of tequila. She was surprised that she seemed to handle the alcohol quite well, but she couldn't say the same about her best friend. As “Ray of Light'' by Madonna started to blast out the speakers, Maria suddenly got up, spilling her tequila over herself.

“Oops!” Liz quickly helped her to clean up, but the blonde girl ignored her, turning to the others. “Let's go dance! No need to be sitting here when there's music playing.”

Isabel smiled at that. “I agree with your friend, Liz, let's do that.”

Sean got up too as they made their way to the dancefloor.

As they began dancing, Liz got lost in the music, swinging her hips and smiling. Her heart was full of joy right now and she couldn’t believe her chance. She was going to have a great life! She felt Maria’s hand slide into her as the two best friends danced together and as Liz opened her eyes to look at the group, her eyes landed on a young man at the bar. He was leaning against the bar with a drink in his hand, smiling as he looked at Liz.

The young brunette blinked and blushed as she saw that he was making his way toward her. She couldn’t see him perfectly because of the flashing lights, but soon, he appeared next to Isabel and whispered something in the blonde’s ear. Jealousy flashed into Liz’s mind for a second before she realized who this fine man was…

Max.

Maria had been right about Isabel’s brother being handsome… and as his eyes locked into Liz, the young woman sensed a shiver run down her spine.

Oh, boy.

She would never forget that look.

[Stefuh]

Edit : I just learned that it's not SERENA but SERINA.

Chapter Four

“And cut!” sighed the director before he turned toward Jenna. “Can you go talk to her, please?”

Jenna nodded before making her way toward Liz, who knew that she had screwed up once again. She didn’t know why, but she couldn’t get that scene in her head… or maybe she knew why. She had barely slept last night because she kept dreaming about Isabel’s brother. She couldn’t stop thinking about him, and the young woman was wondering if maybe she should ask Isabel if he was single.

She shook her head. No! She couldn’t be distracted right now, she had just scored her first TV show, it wasn’t time to think about boys… and how could she approach Isabel with the question? She felt so unprofessional next to her that she couldn’t see how she would ask the blonde woman her brother’s number.

“I’m so sorry, Jenna, I slept poorly. I’m doing the best I can, I swear.”

“Do you drink coffee?” Jenna asked and Liz shook her head. “Well, you should start, maybe it will help.”

Liz sighed at that as the producer looked toward her assistant to ask her for a cup of coffee.

“We won’t be able to leave before this scene is finished.” Jenna said. “Take five, drink that coffee and let’s hope for the best, okay? I know you can do it, Liz.”

The young brunette closed her eyes and tried to center herself before Brody arrived next to her.

“Here, Liz. Black with sugar so it can be more effective.”

She smiled at him. “Thanks, Brody.”

She took the cup of the hot beverage and went to sit down next to Sean.

“You okay?” He asked, concerned.

“Yes… sorry about all those retakes. I’ll try to get some sleeping pills.” She said, well, if they did go back home tonight. “I’ll be better on monday, I promise.”

Sean smiled at her. “Hey, we can’t all have good days. It happens.”

Liz nodded and took a sip of coffee. While she had served coffee a lot at the Crashdown, she had never tasted it… She quite liked it and the warmth helped her to stop shivering. Whenever she slept badly, she shivered all day long after. As her eyes landed on Isabel, she hoped that she wasn’t too inconvenienced against her co-star. She bet Isabel Evans didn’t have bad days.

After she downed the coffee, she got up, ready for another - and final, she hoped - take from the cafeteria scene.

Thankfully, she finally nailed it.

*

“You came home late tonight.” Maria noted and Liz sighed before laying down on her bed.

“I know, I had to retake a scene so many times because I kept screwing up…”

“It happens.” Maria said. “We can’t all have-”

“Good days, I know, your cousin told me the same thing. I still feel worthless.”

Maria frowned at that before she sat on her best friend’s bed. “Naha chica, we’re not doing any self-deprecation here. Just get over it, you’ll see, everything will be better tomorrow. I’ll let you sleep now, you look like you need it. We’ll go get breakfast tomorrow, how about that? There’s this amazing place that I’ve been meaning to try.”

Liz smiled. “Arlight, Ria, thanks.”

Maria smiled at her, wished her goodnight and left her room. Liz quickly changed into her pjs and brushed her teeth, and as soon as her head hit the pillow, she fell asleep.

*

Thankfully for the young woman, it was a Saturday so they didn’t have school today. Liz took her time to get up, shower, and get ready before meeting Maria downstairs. She was starving and couldn’t wait to get to the restaurant.

As they made their way in, they both saw that the place was packed, luckily, Maria had made a reservation the evening before.

“Deluca? Yes, follow me, please.” said the boss boy at the door as he led the two girls to their table.

“This place is amazing,” Liz said as she looked around and recognized some young actors that were trying to break into the industry. She felt at home here because she knew that most people must feel just like she did. Worried that she’ll never be a star, excited about her new projects and opportunities, afraid that one day she’ll lose it all…

The waiter came to their table to put down the menu and serve them some water before he went to another table and Liz looked at what she was going to order.

“I think I’ll have the eggs and bacon,” Maria said.

Liz nodded and chose the pancakes with fruits. After they ordered, she turned toward her best friend.

“So, you’re recording the official music on monday, right? I can’t wait to hear it.”

“And I can’t wait to be in a studio…” her friend said with stars in her eyes, “I’ve dreamt about this for so long, and I am sure that it will lead me to record my own album!”

Liz smiled brightly at Maria. She was about to answer when their plate got put right in front of them. Right on cue, the door to the restaurant opened and the brunette’s eyes landed on the newcomers… Her heart skipped a beat as she saw Max Evans enter.

She knew practically nothing about him, but she couldn’t help how she felt whenever she was in a room with him.

Isabel quickly followed in his footsteps… and another beautiful woman followed them. Liz’s heart seized as a quick scenario formed into her head. Of course, he had a girlfriend, after all, looking like he did, he couldn’t be single.

Maria followed Liz’s gaze and a gasp escaped her lips.

“Oh my God, that’s Serina Blair, she’s a model!”

Liz frowned at that, as worries filled her mind. She quickly withdrew her eyes from the group as they got placed at their table. Serina had long brown curly hair, and had such a great body. She was wearing a dress, and Liz couldn’t imagine herself ever being that beautiful. She was certain that Max Evans would never look her way now.

“Liz, your pancakes are gonna get cold.” Maria said, around a bite of food.

The young woman sighed, she wasn’t hungry anymore… She took smile bites here and there as not to waste the whole thing.

As laughter erupted in the restaurant, she looked up to see Max laugh at something her sister had said. Her eyes wandered toward the model and she got instantly jealous that Serina was laughing with Max.

Now, every time she would see Isabel at work, Liz would only think of Serina.

*

“Let’s go shopping!” Maria said as they exited the restaurant.

She had noticed how her friend hadn’t eaten that much this morning, and she didn’t know what was bothering her, but she hoped that she could lift her spirits up.

“Maria, I don’t know if that’s a good idea, I need to study-”

“Please, Liz, you can study this afternoon. I need a new skirt to celebrate the fact that we’re on our way to become stars.”

Liz couldn’t help but smile at her friend’s enthusiasm, and she nodded. “Alright, but promise me we’ll be back by one, I really need to study.”

“Me too, girlfriend, me too.”

[Stefuh]

Chapter Five

Liz was staring at herself in the mirror. Last week, when she had gone shopping with Maria, she had bought a red top with long sleeves and a pair of black pants… Looking at herself now, something was stirring in the back of her mind. She had never thought of herself as ugly or beautiful, she was just the plain girl from Roswell, New Mexico… but now, she saw some flaws.

She didn’t have curves at the right place, her lower belly was showing through the shirt and her arms looked awkward.

She couldn’t help but remember how beautiful Serina had looked at the restaurant, in that dress.

Sighing, Liz took off her outfit before finding a regular white shirt and some jeans to wear. Who was she trying to kid, she would never be as beautiful as a model. As she was about to exit Amy’s home, Maria came in through the door.

“Liz, I have the song!” Her best friend practically screamed in her ears and a big smile appeared on Liz’s face.

“Oh my God! We need to listen to it right now.”

She had wanted to go on set earlier to practice her lines, but she could spare five minutes to finally listen to the theme song her friend had written.

As Maria put the tape in, Liz’s heart began to beat faster. The first notes could finally be heard and when she heard Maria sing, tears welled up in her eyes. She stayed silent for the rest of the song so they could both listen to it, and once it was over, she turned toward her best friend and hugged her.

“I’m so proud of you, Ria! You sound so professional! I knew Jenna had made the right choice when she chose you, but seriously, I’m in awed right now.”

“Thank you, thank you! We did it, Liz!”

Both girls began to jump up and down, still holding one another.

This was going to be their year.

*

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Liz muttered under her breath as she walked onto the set of the Sunkissed school.

There were a few extras talking on set as they were playing students. Liz was supposed to walk while talking to Jessica’s new best friend, supporting actress Eileen Burrows, about how her cousin was getting on her nerves and that she wasn’t sure if she made the right choice moving in with her aunt and uncle. Among those extras was not other than Serina Blair.

“Why is Serina Blair here?” Liz asked no one in particular, as Isabel entered the room.

“I asked Jenna a favor. Serina would like to become an actress, and Jenna is going to try to write a new character into the show.”

The young brunette blinked a couple of times in disbelief. Competing against Isabel’s popularity on set was already something she had trouble with, but now, she would have to endure Max’s girlfriend too?

It was only nine A.M. and the day was already going terribly.

Oh, how Liz wished she had Maria’s cypress oil to calm her down right now. She looked down at her white shirt and her jeans and, even though she knew she would have to change into Jessica’s outfit, she was regretting not showing up wearing the new clothes she had bought with Maria.

She decided right then and there that she would now put more effort into her appearance. As soon as she would get home tonight, she would ask her best friend for advice. Maria’s style was a bit eccentric, but she always knew what was the latest in fashion. She had never cared about her looks before, except when she went on a couple of dates, but she was in L.A. now, she couldn’t ignore that. Liz took a deep breath and walked toward her dressing room.

Today was going to be a long day.

*

“I’m so happy that you want me to teach you how to do makeup!” Maria said as she sat down on Liz’s bed.

She had gotten all her makeup out with a couple of magazines to see which style would fit Liz better. A CD of Christina Aguilera was playing, and even though they had school tomorrow morning, they had decided to have a girl’s night. Makeup, ice cream and boys talk.

“Sooo…” Maria started. “You don’t need to tell me that you’re doing this for Max.”

“What” Liz exclaimed. “Ria, I haven’t seen him in weeks.”

The young woman was too embarrassed to admit to her friend that she wanted to get more beautiful so she wouldn’t feel ugly around Isabel and Serina…

“Well, who knows, maybe he’ll pop up on set to see his sister. You have to be prepared.”

Liz smiled at that, wishing that Max would come on set so she could talk to him. She didn’t think it was possible to miss someone she had only met once, but she couldn’t deny that she had a crush on Max Evans.

As Maria started to put light foundation on Liz’s skin, the young woman looked down and grimaced as she saw her protruding stomach through her shirt. She was sitting cross legged and she knew her position wasn’t helping her, so she straightened her back and looked into her friend’s concentrated face. Her logical brain was telling her that, since she was a woman, that it was normal for her to have belly fat to protect her organs, but she kept getting flashes of Serina in that tight dress…

She knew it was important to stay healthy and fit. She had opted out of gym classes at school since she had a lot of work to do for her TV show, but maybe she could visit the gym that was near Amy’s place.

“Do you want eyeshadows?”

Liz blinked as she focused on Maria. Shaking her bad thoughts away, she nodded. What was she doing, thinking about the gym when she was supposed to have a girl’s night with her best friend.

“I’m thinking maybe brown…” Maria said, looking through her makeup bag. “Warm tones would suit you better.”

“I trust you,” Liz replied. “So, since we’re talking about boys, do you have someone in sight?”

Maria sighed. “The restaurant I’m performing at doesn’t have a lot of candidates… there’s only this irritating cook who keeps eyeing me whenever I’m singing, but he’s always yelling when the food is ready and I think he’s getting on my nerves.”

“What’s his name?”

“Michael.”

Liz smiled. “Why did you bother to learn his name if he doesn’t interest you?”

Maria opened her mouth, then closed it. “Whatever, chica, enough boy talk.”

Liz laughed at that, grateful that her best friend had managed to make her day better. Oh, she would be teasing her about Michael from now on.

“Thank you, Maria.” Liz said, sincerely.

“For what?”

“For being my friend.”

“You and me, it’s forever, chica. Now we need eyeliner and mascara.”

[Stefuh]

Chapter Six

Liz looked at the clock. It was six A.M. on the dot. She had woken up early before eating breakfast and changing into running gear. It was a bit freezing outside, and she had noticed that she didn’t have any pretty running clothes… and for some reason, she wanted some. She would go shopping after work. She was wearing a pair of gray joggers and a pink t-shirt with a grey zipped hoodie, this would have to do for now. She put her hair up in a high ponytail and grabbed her Discman with the Run Lola Run CD in. When she was finally ready, she got out before Maria woke up, running toward the park where she usually saw people jogging. As she was getting there, she wondered if she should have walked to the park before starting running but it was too late now. Liz stopped at a water fountain, and when she felt refreshed, she looked around for a bit.

Some people were walking their dogs or their children in a stroller. Some people were running too and her eyes landed on a blonde girl. Was that Isabel? She couldn’t tell from here but it sure looked like her. She had sunglasses and a cap, surely to keep herself hidden from the paparazzi. As the girl was getting closer, Liz decided to run the other way to not greet her, and as she was about to turn, she bumped into someone who was getting to the water fountain.

“Oh, I’m sorry-”

“Liz?”

The young woman looked up and felt her heart miss a beat as she looked into the face of Max Evans.

“Oh, Max, hi.” She said, smiling.

“Do you always come here to run? I feel like I’ve never seen you around before.”

“No, I… Well, it’s my first time.”

He nodded. “Excuse me,”

As he stepped toward the water fountain to drink, Liz couldn’t help but stare at him. She couldn’t help it, the guy was so sexy with sweat in his hair, and, wow, had he always been this muscular?

“Max!” Liz got out of her trance as she looked back to see Isabel joining them. “Oh, hi, Liz, sorry, I didn’t see you there.”
“How are you, Isabel?” Liz was trying to be polite, but truth be told, she didn’t really want to talk to Isabel. She looked down at her watch. “Oh, I got to go back, I’m sorry-”

“Wait-” Max said, taking her by the arm to not let her go. Liz looked at Max’s hand on her and then back to his face. He let her go. “Sorry, it’s just… we’re going to eat breakfast around 8 at The Orchid, do you want to come? You can invite Maria too.”

The Orchid was the restaurant where Liz had seen Max with Serina… She couldn’t believe that she had been so jealous of them and had wanted to be seated with Max, and now her dream would come true!

“Sure,” She answered, trying to hide her excitement.

“Great. See you there!”

And at that, Max and Isabel both continued jogging.

What a lucky morning!

*

When Liz had asked Maria to go to the restaurant with her, her best friend had refused, saying that she was too tired from her singing gig from the night before.

“But Max invited me.”

Upon hearing that, Maria sat up on her bed and looked at Liz with wide eyes.

“What, like on a date?”

“Not exactly… he’s going there with his sister and he wants us to join. Please, Ria, I really want to go and I don’t know if I’ll be able to do it without you. Sitting alone with them makes me… nervous.”

Maria pushed the comforter aside to get out of bed. “Alright, give me an hour to get ready and then we’ll go to the restaurant.”

“Thanks, Maria, you’re the best!” Liz said as she hugged her friend closely.

The blonde girl rolled her eyes. “Don’t I know it.”

*

The restaurant was as busy as it had been the other day and Liz tried to look around to see if she wouldn’t spot Max and Isabel first. Truth be told, a part of her was scared that Max had also invited Serina… after all, if she truly was his girlfriend, wouldn’t it be awkward for him to invite two girls to eat with him without her?

Liz had put on her new clothes that neither Max nor Isabel had seen yet, and she felt a bit subconscious. Maria had told her that she looked great in them, and her friend had also done her makeup, but still… Liz felt a bit like a fraud. Was she trying to be someone she was not?

“Do you have a reservation?”

“Max Evans.” Liz said. The man nodded, and without even looking down at the reservation list, led them to Max’s table.

“I guess he must be a regular here,” Maria said. “Or he has connections, like he does at Eclectic.”

As they approached the section in the back, Liz finally spotted Max and she couldn’t help but smile. He was dressed in a casual chic style with a black blazer and God, did he look good. She noticed that next to Isabel was a man that Liz had never seen before. He had brown hair and brown eyes and was talking animatedly to the young woman.

As Max looked up from his menu, he smiled at both girls. “I’m glad you could make it.”

Liz was about to answer when Maria suddenly said “Michael!” in a slight high-pitched scream. The tables around them looked at her, and Liz frowned as she looked back at the unknown man at the table.

“Maria.” Michael said.

“What are you doing here?”

“He’s my best friend.” Max simply replied and looked at Michael. “You know her?”

“We work together.” The young man said and as Max looked back at Maria, Liz could swear that a spark of recognition appeared in Max’s eyes.

So, Michael had also been talking about Maria? They were clearly both infatuated with each other, Liz thought.

They sat down and Liz took a sip of water before looking down at the menu.

“I don’t want to rush anyone,” Isabel said. “But we have to be at the studio in an hour, so if everyone could choose what they’re ordering.”

Michael groaned in frustration and Liz wondered if Max and Michael had known each other for a while… If so, he must have been used to being around Isabel by now. Well, at least, Isabel wasn’t only getting on Liz’s nerves, that was good to know.

As the waiter came to their table, everyone ordered and Liz chose to have some fruits with yogurt and whole wheat bread. She was happy that there was a healthy breakfast section. As she was looking at the menu, images of Serina had kept popping in her head. If she wanted to look as good as the model, she needed to watch what she was eating on top of exercising.

The four of them talked about living in L.A., Sunkissed, and the restaurant both Maria and Michael were working at. For the first time in a while, Liz felt at ease in her new city, and she wished that breakfast could last longer. Unfortunately, as Isabel reminded them, work would be starting soon.

Max and Michael stayed at the table to finish their coffee as Isabel and Liz went on their way to work. Maria claimed she had stuff to do and followed her friend toward the door. Before leaving the restaurant, Liz looked back at Max and hoped that she had made a good impression on him. He smiled at her and she waved him goodbye.

“I think everything went well.” Maria whispered in Liz’s ear so that Isabel wouldn’t hear.

At that, Liz giggled.

“Oh, girl, you’re so in trouble.” Maria replied and Liz smiled at her.

“You’re one to talk.” She said, referring to the fact that her best friend and Michael had talked mostly to each other through breakfast.

Isabel hailed them a taxi and Liz said goodbye to Maria.