Thank you for all your feedback I really appreciate it. This is the next chapter . I hope you are not gonna kill me because it's pretty sad.
Max P.O.V
My father's request brought me out of my thought. I slowly rise from my spot and went to sit down on my office chair. I look at where Liz is. She is kneeing down in front of our daughter and kissing her. OUR DAUGHTER. She is beautiful, she looks just like me except her hair. She has her mother's hair and smile. I wouldn't change it for the world though because she is perfect, I wouldn't wish anything else. How could I be so stupid? I wanted to kill her when she was still inside Liz. How could I even think about killing this precious little person in front of me.
Guilt.......That's what I feel right now. Then her word come back to me " if you really love someone you wouldn't want them dead because they are too important for you" How right she is, she is the most important little person I ever seen and I feel so protective of her right now. God how could I be so stupid? How could I be such a coward? An asshole, a heartless bastard that's what I really am. I am nothing compare to this little person in front of me, I feel ashamed of myself. Liz's voice brought me back from my misery.
"During my high school years, I was in love with your son. He was this most fascinating person I ever seen. But for him i didn't exist, I was just Elizabeth "Ugly" Parker. They even used to call me "Myrtle" but I went on, on my everyday life. My goal was to study and then get out of Roswell so I can live my life in peace. On my Senior year though, Mr. Popular here decided to play a little game on me."She said, she referred to me as Mr. Popular because that's how people call me in high school. She still remember that.
"He already slept with every single girl in our school, I was the only virgin and untouched left. I wouldn't give him the time of the day, I wouldn't let him touch me so he got frustrated and used the only thing he knew to get me to sleep with him. He threaten my mother's life, he looked for some dirt on my mother and used it against me." She paused. I'm ashamed of myself, how much did I hurt her? How can I make things better? How can I change this? But she continue on.....
"I didn't want people to know that the reason why I am my person's only child was that a month after my birth, my mother was raped. the damage was really sever that it destroyed my mother's womb completely. The doctor then told my parents that my mother couldn't have any more kids because her womb couldn't handle it. My parents were devastated that it become a family secret. Max founding it out was a shock for me, I didn't know how he found it out but he did. He used it to get me to sleep with him" she paused again. I see tears rolling down her cheek because this must be taking it's toll on her. It must hurt her a lot, I HURT her a lot. I wish I could make her pain go away, i wish I could take those pain she has and take them on me instead. I don't know what to do or what to say, I put my head down in defeat. I feel all the things that she is feeling as she try to tell the story and know I understand. I understand what a horrible person I am, I understand what an irresponsible person I am and what type of father I am. There is nothing that make me different from a murderer, as a lawyer I know what my fault is, and I know that i would pay for it. And right now I'm paying for it emotionally but i will make sure that I pay for it physically too. She took a deep breath and continue on, on her story...........
" We didn't use protection, i wasn't even on the pill because I never thought I would make love to anybody until I get married. But I lost my virginity protecting my mother and I don't feel guilty for breaking the promises I made to my grandmother that I would stay virgin till I get married. I don't feel guilty because I broke by protecting my mother and anyway why should I feel guilty if I get this little precious person in front of me." She said and took another deep breath while wiping the tears away from her eyes, her beautiful eyes.
"Anyway, a month later, I found out that I was pregnant, I went to the doctor and he confirmed it for me. I didn't know what to do so I went to my only friend Maria and I told her everything, she told me then to tell Max and go from there so I agreed. The next day I went to the UFO Center to find him working. I told I'm about the fact that I was pregnant and he is the father, I told him that I don't know what to do. He accused me for tricking him then, he said that I am doing this to keep him with me because I am a stalker. He was the who force me sleep with him then he has the guts to accusing me of tricking him. The he told me that he doesn't want to have anything to do with the baby, he told me to get an abortion. Then he gave me a check. I ripped it into pieces and throw it at his face. How could he want to kill a baby that is so innocent and fragile? I got so mad, my parents doesn't even know that he is Hope's father because he said he doesn't want to have anything to do with the baby then I left him as he wishes. I didn't want to press charges because it's too emotional for me so i let it go. I struggle to work 2 jobs at a time to keep us alive. Sometimes I got beating up because I fall asleep while working. I made it in the end and I'm proud of myself, I raised my daughter alone. I never told her all the things that she just told you, I don't know where she learn all those from."
I felt like killing myself right now. God, she's been through so much and it's all because of what I did to her, I almost ruined her life. While in one way I did. how can I make this up for her? God help me because I sure as hell don't know what am I supposed to do. I want to hold her right now, I want to take those pain away but I don't know how?
I have made a terrible mistake in my life, a lot of them. But right now I'm too shocked and too overwhelmed to really say anything. I am afraid that I would say the wrong things, that if I open my mouth I would say something I would regret. I hurt a part of myself, probably destroyed her. That little person sleeping in that coach. I walk slowly toward her then knee down in front of her, she is so peaceful. All the things she said to me come back to me. I hurt her, I hurt her really bad, she is just five years old and she shoulder so much pain, she carries so much pain inside of her. She is in so much pain because of me, God, pleas take those pain away from her she doesn't deserve those. I wish I could go back in time and prevent all this from happening. I didn't only hurt Liz but my daughter too. What kind of person am I?
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This is part A I will post part B soon............very soon