Roswell Fanatics

Maria thought her plan was simple. Now that Alex was back he could take Liz to prom and Kyle could take Serena. Michael claimed he would not don a suite but she was confidant things would go her way so she rented a limo for them anyways and made dinner reservations for six. Maria thought prom would go smoothly and they would all dance the night away… boy was she wrong.

Fortunately for Liz these past two weeks she had not run into Tess or Max or even Isabel. Michael continued to annoy her with his Jedi-like, but nonetheless unwanted, advice. Between him and Kyle the Buddhist she had her fair share of quotes and sayings that made no sense whatsoever, to her at least. Yet, they were tolerable and with Serena and Maria and now Alex they were their own little group.

Liz’s concern for Alex was growing everyday. After discussing it with Serena she was unsure if she should try and “probe” his mind to check for the amount of damage the mind warp had caused incase it may further it. She did not check at all so she observed him whenever she could and his behavior was certainly odd at times. He just seemed too happy and yet occasionally he would glance away as if lost for minutes at a time. She knew there was definitely something missing.

The feeling of impending doom washed around her every morning she woke up without a plan and even though she did not see the other three aliens she felt an increasing animosity from them that also threatened to drown her. She knew she had to take action soon so she took a drive out to the pod chamber to speak to Larek with her SVH loving friend.

“So all I do is like hold your hand?”

“Serena, you know how to do this!” Liz sighed exasperatedly.

“I know, I know… I just like, totally had a brain fart!”

“Hey, I thought you were going to stop that valley girl talk!”

“I know. I’m done, my mizzle is zipizzled, fo’ rizzle.”

“What the hell! Serena can’t you just speak regular old English? I mean honestly!”

“Liz, I am trying to learn the languages of Earth!”

“Um I hate to break it to you but I don’t think Valley Girl and Snoop Dawg are considered their own separate languages – you know what? I am not having this conversation. Now take my hand, close your eyes and concentrate!”

“Aye, aye El Presidente!” She made a mock salute to that.

“Serena!”

“Okay, okay!”

“God you have been hanging out with Kyle too much…”

“Well Buddha does say that if-“

“SERENA!”

***

Maria decided to drag Liz to the mall to shop for prom dresses. There was no need to drag Serena, once Maria mentioned the mall Serena got all giddy because she was certain she would meet one of the twins there. Serena and Maria were alike, somewhat. They both knew Liz equally well, they both liked ice cream, and they were both whacky in their own way. Serena took to Maria quickly because Maria promised to show her everything there was to know about Earth and “Earthlings” as Maria deemed her race and Maria took to Serena quickly because the innocent alien listened to everything she said intently.

At first Liz had opted not to tell anyone about Serena but Serena wanted to meet them and Liz couldn’t hide her forever. So she arranged a meeting.


“So how come Max, Tess and Isabel can’t be here?”

Michael had stood off in the corner while Liz had introduced Serena and her unearthly origins to Michael, Maria, and Kyle. She had been wary of letting Kyle in on their “secret” due to the fact he was living with Tess but after talking to Kyle about his life when she had “disappeared” it seemed that Tess hardly spent any time at the house and was either away or with Max. Liz tried to suppress a cringe when she heard that and made a mental note to speed up the plans for the safety of him and Isabel.

“They just can’t Michael.”

“What aren’t you telling us, Liz?”

“Nothing.”

“There’s something deeper going on here, that much I can tell.”

“Well no shit Spaceboy,” Maria piped in, “and it’s clear that at this moment in time we can’t know about it, we may know soon or might never but right now Liz needs our trust and I for one am going to give it to her. Kyle?”

Kyle looked around the room thoughtfully. He remembered vividly the last time he helped Liz and though he was wary he knew without a doubt he would do this for her too so he nodded his head.

“Well Spaceboy?”

Michael just stared at Liz.

“Michael?” Maria was inching towards him readying her hand if he needed to be struck upside the head. Liz was happy to see this kind of banter between the two again but she was worried for them, worried for all of them.

“Alright. We don’t tell them. But on one condition.”

“Michael…” Maria said warningly.

“No Maria. Liz is asking us to lie to Max, the so-called leader of this… well right now messed up group and to Isabelle, our friend, so I say a little condition won’t hurt.”

Now it was Liz’s turn to stare at him assessing her options. Michael sighed.

“Liz, how am I supposed to protect you if I don’t know what you’re doing.”

Liz’s eyes grew wide. ‘Did he know?’ she wondered. ‘No, that’s impossible’ she inwardly let a deep breath out. Just Michael being Michael. She had kept the connection tightly closed off from the others so she knew he could not feel her or rather what she was but it was clear he could feel something subconsciously even though he may not understand or notice it.

“Michael… what’s your condition?”

“You have to tell us after prom.”

“Prom?”

“We need to be a unit. We are weaker if we’re all separated into different groups. I mean I barely see Max or Iz anymore because they assume I’m with Maria and she’s with you or the “new girl” a.k.a our new resident alien. How are we supposed to fight our enemies let alone beat them if we can’t stand each other or even stand up together?”

“I… fine. I’ll tell you by prom.” She conceded because she knew ultimately Michael was right and if his gut instincts told him they needed to be a unit soon then Liz would happily comply. She felt a sort of morbid relief knowing that she wasn’t the only one who felt the imposing darkness closing around Roswell and their linked lives.



Liz stared at her reflection in the mirror, Serena stood beside her. The deep purple of the satin made Liz’s skin seem tanner and the sparkling gems that swirled across the chest area made her face glow ethereally. It fell gracefully down to the ground with an empire cut waist, half-inch straps and was completely backless. Serena sighed.

“Liz, you look like a Queen!”

She stared at herself. The black dress she bought last year lay discarded in her closet. It belonged to a prom for someone else with some other boy and that was not the prom happening tomorrow. An ache tugged at her heart for a loss of something more than innocence and love that faded further from her grasp with each passing moment.

“I don’t feel like one.” She whispered.

****

The next night the three “couples” hung out in the Crashdown before the prom and Michael was handsomely dressed, as Maria had confidently thought he would be. Liz wasn’t the only one who was jittery and though Maria said it was only because it was her first prom Liz knew she was nervous for other reasons. Maria had always been intuitive and she knew also something bigger than prom was going to happen tonight.

“So… are the others going to prom?”

“Yeah, Tess said something about Max taking her and Isabelle, which I thought was a little weird. I would think Iz would rather be caught dead than be escorted to a prom by her brother. I guess things have really changed.”

Kyle was dressed just as, if not more handsomely than Michael in a similar black suit and a blue corsage that matched Serena’s dress perfectly. Maria’s green eyes were more vibrant that usual due to her emerald green dress and she looked like a Celtic Priestess. Liz turned to her companion Alex who was staring off into space and he looked devastated, her concern was overthrown and she threw caution to the winds; she probed his mind.


“Hey Alex.” He lifted his head up from the table in the courtyard and Isabelle was standing in front of him.

“Hey.”

“I… so I heard you were back and it, um, looks like you are…” she trailed off lamely.

“Yeah, I guess I am.”

“How was Sweden.”

“I don’t know. I met someone. I think she was pretty. I went out with her or something.”

Isabelle looked slightly hurt but her Ice Queen faced was back in no time.

“That’s… that’s great Alex, really.”

“I guess.”

“Do you – are you still seeing her?”

“I don’t know.”

She raised a quizzical eyebrow at him, “you don’t know?”

“Yeah! I said I don’t know Isabelle! What are you, deaf?” He yelled. His face was contorted with confusion and yet he seemed to stare at her with defiant disgust at the same time. She was taken aback.

“Alex… I just wanted to say I’m sorry. For everything about Liz and what I said. I should have believed you but I just… I didn’t and I’m sorry Alex, I’m so sorry.”

He let out a tired sigh. “Isabelle, I’m sorry too. I’ve just been a little out of it ok. I forgive you, I really do. Honestly. Just coming back and all the commotion with Liz and the tension with the group is starting to wear on me but I do forgive you. I swear.” He smiled at her genuinely and even though he remembered liking Leanna he knew he would always pick Isabelle over anyone. They stared at each other for a few minutes. Facing each other from across the lunch table and Isabelle found her strength and decided to go in for the kill. Everything on the line.

“Alex… I know this might be a bit forward of me but do you want to go to prom with me… as more than friends?”

To say he was surprised was an understatement. Isabelle Evans asking the humble Alex Whitman to prom? He couldn’t believe it. He was amazed. Maybe that time in Sweden had helped him even though parts of it was fuzzy, he had somehow, someway come back only to attract the most out of reach being he had ever yearned for. He would pick Isabelle over anyone forever but he didn’t want to get hurt either so he said no, politely of course.

“No? Alex! Do you have another date or something?” She looked hurt and Alex immediately sensed the Ice Queens icy walls beginning to form so he did damage control as quickly as he could.

“Not as of yet but Isabelle that’s not the reason I’m saying no. I need time Isabelle. So many times I’ve put myself out there only to have you turn me down and I’d be lying if I said it didn’t hurt. I realized, well I think I realized, when I was away that someone beautiful could love me but no matter how much I wanted her to be you she wasn’t and it was wrong for me to ask her to. Though I don’t remember asking her,” he muttered under his breath. “I’m not ready to take that step with you, because just like you needed time before, now I do and that’s all I’m asking for.”

“How long?”

“I don’t know but how about we take it slow? Go to the prom Isabelle and I promise I’ll dance at least two dances with you, if you’ll still want the studly Alex Whitman.”

Isabelle gave him a warm smile that confirmed she would give him time and that held a promise to wait for him until he was ready. Isabelle knew her feelings now and accepted them, she loved Alex Whitman and she would wait forever if she had to. She would prove to him that she could hold his heart safe.

“I’ll always want the Studly Mr. Whitman!” She said saucily as she walked away.



Liz smiled as she looked at Alex. Maybe things would work out after all. He turned in his seat toward her, his face no longer sad but happy go lucky as if nothing was amiss. She smiled at him, got off the stool and headed straight of Serena. Once both girls were behind the door in the employee room Liz’s demeanor crumbled and her eyes began to cloud over with tears sure to ruin her flawless make-up. Serena looked at her with concern. Liz gripped the other girl’s arms: an act of desperation to keep herself from drowning in the pain.

“When is she coming?” Serena stared at Liz so she shook her hard. “Serena, when is she coming?”

“She should be here tonight. I told her to wait on your balcony until after prom. Liz what’s wrong?”

“It’s Alex! Oh god!” she sobbed into her friends arms, “it’s a miracle he’s lasted so long. Why did we wait? God, why did I wait? Serena, Serena, SERENA!” She squeaked hysterically, “I shouldn’t have waited! I’m so selfish! How could I do that? I’m a monster.”

“Liz, Liz! Calm down okay, look at me! Liz, look at me! What are you talking about?”

“I shouldn’t have waited. The second he got back we should have done something. Now Max is in her hands, and maybe Isabelle too. I just wanted… some- something. I wanted just one more taste of normal, you know? Before everything went downhill. But I was blind and I didn’t see…”

“Liz, you can’t see the future, you didn’t know.”

“No, no, no, Serena, I didn’t WANT to see. Listen to me, I DIDN’T WANT TO SEE!” Serena placed her hand over Liz’s mouth so the others in the front room didn’t hear them. When she was clam enough Serena removed her hand, Liz’s brown eyes, huge with grief, met hers.

“He’s going to die Serena. We can’t save him. I can’t heal that mess inside his head. God, that bitch fucked him up so badly! He’s going to die. I can’t save him. God, I can’t save him. No, no… Alex is going to die tonight.” She sobbed forebodingly.

Serena held her friend close to her and let her cry but she knew they also had a job to do and saving Alex’s life was included in that.

“Liz, Alex isn’t dead yet. In fact, he’s sitting right outside that door waiting for you and probably wondering where you are and if you’re okay. Why are you mourning him when he isn’t even gone?” She lifted her friends face up to her own and upon seeing Liz’s expression of doom she knew she had to be tough. She untangled herself from Liz’s embrace and took a step back, steeling herself and putting aside her emotions.

“As your second in command I am allowed to speak my mind when I think you are not seeing the mission through. I feel as though you are faltering. You have already made mistakes that may cost innocent lives and your actions and out of control emotions are showing me that you may make another misjudgment and put more innocent lives at risk. It is my duty to remind you of that mission and your own duty. You took an oath and to break it is treason.”

Serena was hard, cold and void of emotion. She had to be. Liz was about to go off the deep end and she needed to remind her to balance and focus and it seemed the only way she was going to listen was to throw her duty in her face and Serena did just that. Her tact had the desired effect as Liz’s face shone with hurt, then anger and then cold determination.

“I KNOW my duty, General.” She spat harshly. “I know it all too well. Now if you have a problem with the way I am handling the situation then you are free to leave.”

Serena sighed. She was tired and worn out. Her senses were on overdrive and highly alert. She did not mean for this to turn into a battle of egos.

“Liz, I’m sorry. I know what I said was low but you need to understand that he’s not gone. That we’re going to save him. We are. This is a crappy situation but blowing up like that isn’t going to help, and it isn’t like you do to that. What’s really going on?”

Looking at Serena, Liz was going to immediately deny her question but instead her mouth betrayed her, “If Alex dies, Serena, I’ll never forgive him, I’ll hate him.” Liz waved her hand over he face, fixing her make-up, squared her shoulders, plastered on her best smile and walked through the swinging doors. Serena knew Liz wouldn’t hate Alex if he died, so what did she mean? And then a light clicked on and it dawned on her. As far as Serena knew Liz had only seen Max twice since their return. She had forgotten that Liz loved him, for Liz had not mentioned him at all and he seemed to be out of her mind. Yet now she understood that he had not been and that Liz held on to what little hope she had that they might work it out but if Alex’s fate did not last the night then that could never happen.

Serena let out another tired sigh as she headed for the front, ‘this is going to be a long night’ she thought.






****


That's it's 'til next time, enjoy!!!

And PS... I promise there will be some Max action in the next one!

He was watching her dance with Alex, laughing at something he said. He was watching. Watching, stalking, stalking his prey. Her head was thrown back and he could see her smooth, tan neck, so gracefully thrown back. He thought she looked beautiful in purple. The color was so deep, and the silk so soft and light it looked as though it were a part of her skin moving with her hips as she moved around. She was holding him so tightly.

He watched her dancing bitterly. Bitterly he craved her in his arms so he could love her and then break her. Break her like she broke him. He had changed so much this past year. His torture, her actions and his reactions had caused him to love her so passionately and hate her so maliciously at the same time. He was stuck in a place where he hardly recognized himself and he missed her. She had made him a better person… once, but now she only brought out his hatred and his love for her only lived in a small piece of his heart.

She showed him his duty and his destiny and now he accepted it. No more fighting. No more love. He was an alien. Did he feel? Did he love? How could something so inhuman as he love? It must have been a hallucination. She was his salvation and now she was his bane. But wasn’t she an alien too? With powers? His feelings were always so confusing these days. After he saw her alive and well his heart started feeling again but she was cold and distant. Then she told them about her powers and Cerio and some hope crept through him. Maybe they could be together now that they were the same but then an image of her betrayal would shine brightly before him and his hate would eradicate whatever hope he heart yearned for. His emotional turmoil was so deep he could hardly even process that Liz had been to another planet, a planet so close to his. If he was truly honest with himself he did not think or speak of it, even when Iz tried asking him about it, because it scared him more than Pierce or the FBI ever did. Though Liz had shown him his duty and though he may have accepted it he didn’t want to leave Earth. He didn’t want to fight or be King and he didn’t want to die for a planet he never remembered.

He was a coward. Humans had shown him that.

“May I cut in?”

Liz was about to protest but Alex didn’t notice. He wanted to find Isabelle and dance with her for a while and he knew Liz would be all right with Max. They had things to sort out anyway.

“Sure, I’m on my way to go dance with your lovely sister, anyway!”

Max nodded and took Liz into his arms. “So Liz, how’ve you been?”
She felt awkward and nervous in his arms and her emotions were all over the board. How did it come to this? Their relationship was reduced to nothing. No more long soulful gazes met her eyes, only a strange turmoil of indifference, hate, regret and perhaps long lost love.

“The new girl and Kyle look cozy, you aren’t jealous are you?”

There it was, the first strike. Lines were drawn and if Liz said her heart wasn’t aching then Michael would call her a liar again. Learning what she had on Cerio hadn’t changed things. Max hated her and the damage was done.

“Not really. It was more of a wham, bam thank you ma’am kinda screw, you know what I mean?” Max gripped her tightly and she winced a little. His fingers dug into her violently. She knew this was it. This was all they were now. Hurting each other so much, so passionately that hate was the only emotion they could muster around each other.

“I can’t say I do know what you mean Liz but maybe one day you’ll let me have a go? I hear the Parker’s are pretty easy.” It was her turn to fight back. Though she may not be physically as strong as Max her powers were stronger and so she used them. She shocked him with some electricity, her ex-boyfriend, her ex-soul mate, and her lost love. He was the one who winced this time.

“I don’t know Evans, I’m not really into inexperienced men… well I guess in your case, inexperineced boys.”

“And how many have you had? Ten, twenty?”

“How’s Tess? You guys fuck yet? Was it wild Max? Or no, no that’s not you… I bet you were gentle. Whispering words of love and eternity. Real soft and slow, though probably not long. You held her and she loved you back. You’re Queen. YOU’RE destiny. But then again she does look frisky. She probably isn’t a virgin anyway. Aw, look at that, the two girls you’ve ever wanted knew you couldn’t please them so they went to other people.”

Those words were intended to hurt only Max but Liz felt her heart break more for that gentleness and love and eternity. Months before, that is how she wanted Max to have her but she wouldn’t have him and he wouldn’t have her and that experience of awkward movements but most of all love when losing virginity were lost forever. Somehow they ended up dancing into the hallway and he slammed her against the wall roughly.

“Do you need some lessons?” She continued even under his murderous glare and ache in her back and head. “I could teach you. Don’t you want to touch me?”

“You make me sick.”

“Good. You make me sick too.”

“I can’t imagine how I ever loved you.”

“Oh, believe me Max the feeling is mutual.”

Right at that moment he hated her. He hated her with his entire being and he told her so. What she did, she ruined them, she broke him and the world broke him. He was now tamed and he made the first step on his path to Destiny. Holding her against the wall, he let her go.

“In all of this… this whole mess, you were right about everything Liz and now I’m seeing it so clearly.”

“What’s that?”

“We were NEVER meant for each other. I should have listened to you. You aren’t my destiny, you never could be. I could never… love someone like you. All these events that have happened since I saved you has now made me realize that maybe it was a mistake. Maybe everyone would be safer if you were dead. But I guess now it doesn’t matter. You’re dead to me Liz Parker. I never knew you.”

That was the final hit and Liz was cut deeply. So deep she just stood there her heart bleeding out of her, breaking with each step he took away from her and towards Tess. She didn’t need to watch him go to know that it was over. To know that now he would be in Tess's arms and further from her heart, broke her all over again and she mourned for that loss, a loss of a love that was by all means rightfully hers. Long after he had walked away, staring at the wall opposite of her she let her tears run down her cheeks freely.

*****


Isabelle was in heaven. The way Alex held her, the way he touched her felt more right than anything had ever felt. She knew she hurt him. Those months after Liz’s disappearance had taken it’s toll on everyone especially their relationship, and after Liz was gone Alex seemed to become more and more hostile. As he pulled away she wanted more and soon no matter what she did it was wrong… except now. Now she was dancing in his arms. They moved so well together she thought. He held her perfectly and though he promised her two dances they were on their seventh, all in row.

“I want to see you again.”

“Of course you will.”

“I mean I want to see you like this Alex.”

“So you want me to parade around in a Tux forever for you, Miss Evans?”

“Well, not exactly I mean, what I mean is, I want to see you again as more than friends.”

Alex stared at her with such emotion it overwhelmed her and made her feel safe and worshipped at the same time.

“I would love to see you as more than friends.” Alex took a chance and kissed her. This kiss was so different than that kiss on his porch. It was electrifying and Isabelle deepened it. It was a kiss between two people who now felt the same about each other and their passion for each other only fueled it further.


****


She found her in the hallway. Isabelle had taken a break from Alex in search for refreshment and her reverie of the night had found herself in the hallway with Liz. She was sitting against the wall on the ground just staring out into oblivion. Isabelle sat beside her; Liz was the first to break the silence.

“He kissed you… you’re glowing.”

“He let you go.”

“It was coming. I think you forgot something, Isabelle. You were afraid to expose yourselves because you may get hurt but humans, we hurt too and sometimes when we’re hurt so bad… so, so deeply we can’t go back.”

Isabelle sat silently next to her once arch-nemesis, contemplating her words.

“I’m glad you guys are finally together but just remember, you can hurt him just as much as he can hurt you. Then what do you do? What do you do when the person who shares half your soul leaves you and mostly because it’s your fault? How do you feel whole again? How do you continue knowing he can have someone else because of destiny? How do you go on living knowing that he’s kissing her the way he should be kissing you? I don’t- I don't... God, I don't know how to move forward without him.”

“I… I would try to- well I- I guess… I don’t know Liz.”

“Yeah… me either.”


************************************


Continued tomorrow!

Okay, here's the rest as promised and for the first time I am keeping it! This part is a little dark so beware. And all you dreamers... just have faith in them I guess. That's all I can give you for right now...


Erin




She found her in the hallway. Isabelle had taken a break from Alex in search for refreshment and her reverie of the night had found herself in the hallway with Liz. She was sitting against the wall on the ground just staring out into oblivion. Isabelle sat beside her; Liz was the first to break the silence.

“He kissed you… you’re glowing.”

“He let you go.”

“It was coming. I think you forgot something, Isabelle. You were afraid to expose yourselves because you may get hurt but humans, we hurt too and sometimes when we’re hurt so bad… so, so deeply we can’t go back.”

Isabelle sat silently next to her once arch-nemesis, contemplating her words.

“I’m glad you guys are finally together but just remember, you can hurt him just as much as he can hurt you. Then what do you do? What do you do when the person who shares half your soul leaves you and mostly because it’s your fault? How do you feel whole again? How do you continue knowing he can have someone else because of destiny? How do you go on living knowing that he’s kissing her the way he should be kissing you? I don’t know how to move forward without him.”

“I… I would try to- well I- I guess… I don’t know Liz.”

“Yeah… me either.”




Long after Isabelle had left her, she still sat on the floor. The dust and dirt from footprints soiled her elegant gown. She was unsure of how to progress. If Max hated her would he still heal Alex? No. She had just sent him into the arms of the enemy. She had basically just condemned the King of an entire planet to death, she handed him over on a silver platter. Her pain and anger towards him and towards a version of him he wasn’t even aware of, had caused her to throw him to the wolves. And even now she couldn’t move to undo the damage. His words reverberated in her ears and mind over and over again. He wished he didn’t save her. Was he right? Was everyone better off if she were dead?

“It’s his fight, Liz. Whether he likes it or not he’s the King and needs to fish out the enemies. He needs to learn how to be King and telling him won’t teach him anything. He needs to learn it by himself and if he learns in Tess’s arms then so be it.”

“I really hate you right now Serena.”

“I know you do.”

Liz let her head fall back against the wall as Serena sat down beside her.

“I feel… like I’ve lost everything. When you’re a little kid you want to be a grown up but this… this was too fast. I’m not ready for all this Serena. Right now, in this moment I wish all this never happened.”

“So do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.”

“Um- isn’t that from Lord of The Rings?”

“Yeah but it’s relevant here, Liz. Gandalf was right.” Liz rolled her eyes. “This a crap situation but it’s a situation we’re in nonetheless, soooo, do we sit here and mope and let things run wild around us? When have you let this sink in? Never, you just accepted what my dad said to you and your powers. You didn’t run away, cry, and scream… nothing. Now, it’s coming back to you and you’ve screamed, gotten hysterical, cried. Do you need more time? If I had it, I would give it to you, I really would-“

“That’s it! The granolith!” Liz jumped up as the epiphany came to her cause Serena to follow suit.

“Wait- wait- I thought you said that you wouldn’t allow it to be used for you know… time travel after everything that’s happened.”

“I know and that’s not what I mean. I think I kn-“

“Hey Liz are you okay? Isabelle mentioned you were upset… something about Max. Hey, I’m sorry I let him dance with you.” Alex stood five feet away from them; his tie was undone as well as the buttons on his shirt. His coat was draped casually over his arm.

“Where’s Isabelle now?”

“Max and Tess were leaving and are dropping her off home. Liz, oh my little Lizzie, I have a date with her tomorrow. I’m going to sweep her off her feet.” He smiled wistfully at her. He was radiating pure happiness. Liz knew this wouldn’t last long because she had to find answers quickly.

“Alex, I need you to listen to me okay.” He nodded his head. “What were you doing in Las Cruxes?” He looked at her blankly.

“LIZ!”

“No, no Serena… Alex, think about it…. We know you weren’t in Sweden, we know you were in Las Cruxes, what were you doing there?” He continued to stare at her blankly and then his entire demeanor changed. He began pacing back and forth in front of them.

“I was in Sweden, Maria. I met Leanna there and we went to the places. I was in a dorm room and she made me meet Leanna but Leanna’s not Leanna.” Liz gripped his shoulders. He wasn’t making any sense. Maria wasn’t even here.

“Alex… I’m Liz, it’s Liz… what were you doing in the dorm room?”

“I was in the room and she messed with my mind. I want her stop messing with my mind. I don’t remember. The key. Leanna gave me the key. I have the key. But she told me I could never be with Isabelle.” Tears began to trickle down his face and he looked so lost. So lost.

“Where’s the key? Where’s the key?”

“Key… the key, the key. She told me Isabelle didn’t love me. Why won’t she love me, Mom? I want her to love me. No one sees her like I do. I can give her the world. But I don’t know where the world is and Leanna’s not Leanna. Mad. I’m so mad. I hide in the key. I just want her love me. We have a date tomorrow. I think she might like me. Do you think she might love me on day?” He was like a little kid. He looked at her with such hope she could only give him what he wanted.

“I think she loves you, Alex.” She was teary eyed to see her friend like this. He smiled at her so brightly but she had to continue. “Where’s the key?”

“I hide in the key. I take translation. I read letters in the book-“

“The Book! She had you translate the Destiny Book! Okay I just need you tell me where you hide in the key.”

“My car. I’m taking Isabelle, my beauty- she’s a princess did you know that, little Lizzie? Yup, my princess. I’m her prince.”

“You are her prince.” Liz’s shoulders began to shake with tears. She needed to stay calm for him. Stay calm.

“But I need to find the rest of my mind. Tess has it. I need it back otherwise she won’t love me.”

“We’re going to fix you. I’m going to take care of you okay?”

Liz turned to Serena. “Is she here yet?”

“She’s waiting on your balcony as planned.”

“Good, we’re going back to the Crash and everyo-”

“NO!” Liz turned around to find Alex crying on the floor in the fetal position.

“Alex!” Liz ran over to him and held him. “Hey, what is it?”

“She hurt me. My head hurts so badly. She DID THIS TO ME! LOOK AT ME!” He shook her off and got up off the floor to begin pacing again.

“LOOK AT ME! I’m falling apart. SHE NEEDS TO FIX ME! I NEED TO BE WHOLE. I CAN’T REMEMBER-“ Liz walked towards him slowly.

“Alex, we’re going to sort this all out just calm down.”

“CALM DOWN? CALM DOWN? SHE USED ME! SHE USED ME TO DECODE THAT STUPID BOOK. SHE RUINED MY MIND AND YOU WANT ME TO CALM DOWN… LOOK AT ME, LIZ! LOOK!” He grabbed her face. His tears falling just as quickly down his cheeks, as they were hers.

“Jesus, look at me. Liz, what’s my middle name?”

“Charles!” She cried. She placed her hands above his. “Your middle name is Charles, Alexander Charles Whitman. We’re best friends.”

“Do I have other friends?”

“Maria… we... we're the three musketeers.” She cried harder. He looked at her seriously.

“Am I dying?” Liz choked. He shook her.

“Am I dying, Liz?” She couldn’t answer.

“Liz…”

“Yes, Alex.” She cried. His eyes held a devastation beyond anything Liz had ever seen. Seconds later they hardened.

“No. I can’t die. I have a date with Isabelle tomorrow. I’m going. We’re going to have a beautiful time. I’m going to marry her one day. Do you hear me Liz. Tess is going to fix me. I’m going to make her.” With that he let go of her and raced towards the exit. She stood there watching him leave before her senses kicked in.

“Serena,” she wiped the tears from her cheeks, “get Maria and Michael. Go to the Crash, pick her up and call me when you’re on the road.” Serena grabbed her arm.

“But Liz-“

“God damn it Serena! That’s an order. Now go.” Liz kicked her heels off and ran in the direction Alex left.



She didn’t think about the concrete pounding beneath her shoeless feet or the glass that was embedded further into her heel with every step she took. She had to keep the pain away from her mind. She just kept running. He was only a block ahead of her. Heading to Crash she suspected, to his car. He had tripped back near the school, which allowed Liz to catch up to him somewhat.

She had to get to him. She had to. She had to so she kept running.

When she finally reached the Crashdown he was getting into his car. She raced to the passenger side and opened the door, jumping in just before he took off.

“Alex.” She was panting heavily from the run. “Alex. Stop the car.”

“No.”

“Alex, please stop the car.” He pulled out a gun from the center console and pointed it at her.

“I said no Liz.”

“JESUS CHRIST! Alex… where the hell did you get a gun?” His demeanor had changed yet again. Manically cool, calm and collective.

“Funny story actually- oh, wait! I don’t even remember! She is going to fix me and then she’s going to pay.”

“I think we should pull over.”

“Call Isabelle.”

“Put the gun down.” He continued to point the gun at her. She touched his shoulder, he flinched and cocked the gun. She removed her hand.

“Please… it’s me Liz, little Lizzie! Just put the gun down and I’ll help you okay. I only want to help you.” He glanced at her and withdrew the .9 mm.

“I’m sorry Liz. I just can’t think straight. My mind is so jumbled.”

“I know, I know.” Liz pulled out her cell phone from her small purse that hung from her wrist and dialed the Evans number.

“Isabelle?”

“Hi… Liz?”

“Yeah it’s me… listen do you know where Max and Tess went?”

There was a pause. And Liz didn’t need her to say what they were doing. It was prom night after all.

“It’s okay Iz, just please…”

“I think… I’m pretty sure they went to the observatory.”

“The observatory? Okay, thanks!”

“Is everything okay?”

“Yeah it’s fine. I gotta run. Thanks again. Bye.”

“Bye!”



Liz hung up the phone only to have it ring again.

“Serena, did you get her?”

“Yeah, but-“

“Good we’re heading to the Observatory. Follow us there but tell Michael and Maria to go to the Pod Chamber.”

“Okay but Liz there’s something else-“

“No time. I gotta go! Bye”

She hung up the phone. Whatever Serena had to say needed to wait. She needed to deal with Alex.

“If I get back my mind everything will be okay. She’ll fix this and then everything will be back to normal. Isabelle will love me, I’ll show that bitch she was wrong. Me and Iz are meant to be.”

She looked over at her friend who was speeding towards the observatory gripping the wheel with one hand and the gun with the other for dear life and the feeling of dread began to suffocate her.


“step one you say we need to talk
he walks you say sit down it's just a talk
he smiles politely back at you
you stare politely right on through”

Alex pulled the car into the Observatory parking lot. Max’s jeep was there. He began to get out of the car but Liz used her powers to lock the doors.

“Alex. Stay here.”

“No.” Liz grabbed the gun from his hand and looked at him as she dismantled it.

“See this. This gun isn’t you. You don’t carry a gun.”

“I don’t know who I am anymore Liz!”

“I KNOW AND I’M TELLING YOU WHO YOU ARE!” She screamed. She lost control. She took a few deep breaths to calm herself down.

“Alex… you can’t go in there.”

“I have to.”

“I know you think you have to but if you go in there and she tries warping you again… that’s it. One more warp, even a little one and you’re dead. No date with Isabelle, no more musketeers, nothing. We need you, I need you, and Isabelle needs you. Stay here, Alex. For right now just stay in the car.”

“some sort of window to your right
as he goes left and you stay right
between the lines of fear and blame
and you begin to wonder why you came”

He nodded his head. She got out of the car and used her powers to lock him in, just in case. She took one step and winced. The glass was still embedded in her foot. She picked it out and watched morbidly for a few seconds as the blood began to flow from the deep cut. She didn’t have time to heal it right now. It would have to wait.

She took a deep breath and walked towards the door. She peered through the window. Evening expecting what she was could never have prepared her for the image the clear glass presented her with.

Two naked bodies glistening with sweat were gyrating together. She couldn’t take her eyes off them. The way he was touching her, stroking her face and pushing back a stray piece of blonde hair, placing it behind her ear. She couldn’t move. She unconsciously made the same gesture; something he did to her on so many occasions was now tainted. On their faces were expressions of pure pleasure. He didn’t look like he was a virgin. They moved so well together, like it was a rehearsed dance that they had performed before, so in tune with each other. She couldn’t take her eyes off the scene. She touched the window and a brief flash of a baby burst in her mind. Her first premonition.

She puked. She puked all over the front of her elegant deep purple dress before she could move. A baby. A baby.

“where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
somewhere along in the bitterness
and I would have stayed up with you all night
had I known how to save a life

let him know that you know best
‘cause after all you do know best
try to slip past his defense
without granting innocence
lay down a list of what is wrong
the things you've told him all along
and pray to God he hears you
and pray to God he hears you”

A baby. She ran. Tears ran down her face. Her puke stained her dress. She ran. Back to the car. Back to Alex. She got in the car. A baby. A fucking baby.

“We need to leave.”

“What happened?” She saw headlights. It was Serena.

“We need to leave.”

“Is she going to fix me?”

“I SAID WE NEED TO LEAVE.” Liz used her powers to start the car. “Drive.”

“Liz… please.”

“She’s not going to help you.”

“But-“

“Drive to the pod chamber.” Alex grabbed the wheel and put the car in drive.

“where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
somewhere along in the bitterness
and I would have stayed up with you all night
had I known how to save a life”

She felt sick. She smelled. The tears wouldn’t stop. It was over. They were driving away. She would be okay. She had to be. They were going to have a baby.

Alex shook his head.

“No. No. She has to fix me.”

“as he begins to raise his voice
you lower yours and grant him one last choice
drive until you lose the road
or break with the ones you've followed
he will do one of two things
he will admit to everything
or he'll say he's just not the same
and you'll begin to wonder why you came”

“Alex!” Liz warned.

“NO!!!! SHE HAS TO FIX THIS!!!!!!!” He screamed.

“We can find another way! There’s someone else who can help us!”

“NO, NO, NO, NO, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! THERE’S NO ONE ELSE! WE’RE GOING BACK! SHE IS GOING TO MAKE EVERYTHING BETTER!”

“Alex!” Alex began to turn the wheel. “Alex what are you doing?” He swerved. Didn’t he see the cars coming towards them? He tried to do a u-turn. “ALEX!” Liz screamed. The car was going too fast, too fast. “ALEX!!!! STOP! AALEXXXXX! STOP THE CAR!!!!! PLEASEEEEEE!” she screamed.

He lost control. The car swerved. Too fast. The trees were coming at them too fast. She tried to grab the wheel but the impact was sooner than she thought. They hit the trees. The crunching of metal hit her ears. Alex screamed. She screamed. They’re going to have a baby.

Then nothing. Nothing but blackness.

“where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
somewhere along in the bitterness
and I would have stayed up with you all night
had I known how to save a life.”








*lyrics by The Fray.

So I am a DIRTY LIAR. I know I said I would update this sooner but RL has had me in NY a lot and I was unable to post. So I will post this now and the rest tomorrow. Thanks for the fb!!

<3 erin


Chapter 11 - Keep Breathing

Can we ever really know what our destiny is? Sometimes we may have an idea or we may be sure of our path but is that merely based on faith? “Meant to live, meant to die, meant to be together, meant to…” how, without the power of premonition or the pure knowledge of destiny itself, could we know what is truly meant to be? Really, what do we know of destiny but ideas of it? We believe that some people are meant to take another breath and another after that. We believe in the depths of our hearts that certain people are supposed to grow old with us and feel life but what we believe is meant to be is sometimes without our consent... changed. All we, as living, feeling, intelligent organisms, can do is remember to keep breathing when the people we love so much, the people we once believed were destined for something more are taken away from us. All we hope for is that they are some where more beautiful and more peaceful than we could ever imagine.

It was a quiet night in Roswell, New Mexico as Sheriff Jim Valenti knocked on the third and final door, on what was slowly turning out to be the longest, hardest and emotionally devastating night of his career. Diane Evans answered the ominous sound and opened the door.

“Jim, is everything alright?” He took his hat off to reveal puffy, blood shot eyes. He cleared his throat.

“Diane. I need to speak with Max and Isabelle, please.” She looked at him for a few moments not sure if she wanted to wake her children up for what she was sure to be bad and possibly the worst news, from the looks of the Sheriff, they were destined to receive.

And on their prom night no less.

“Diane, please.”

“Right, right...” she opened the door further and gestured for him to come in. “I’ll just go get the kids and Philip if you want to wait in the living room.”

He aimlessly made his way to the center of the room; his mind was blank of thought. The night’s events made him weary and for the first time he felt his age catching up to him. His gaze avoided the window that faced the road, a reminder he didn’t need. This time he felt the loss close enough, so close he didn’t need to be reminded.

He heard the slap of bare feet on the hardwood floor in the hallway. The Evans’ made their way into the living room.

Isabelle was rubbing the five am sleep from her eyes, she was making her way to the couch with her parents but one look at the Sheriff sent her back to her brother’s side. Upon meeting Jim’s eyes Max had remained standing in the doorway.

“What happened?” She asked.

“I think you two should sit down.”

“Sheriff, what happened?”

“Isabelle…” Diane motioned for her to sit down.

“No. Tell us.”

“There was an accident on the road over by the old observatory.” Isabelle's head snapped to Max’s.

“Alex was driving, it looks like he tried to make an illegal u turn and lost control of the vehicle.”

“Is he ok? Is he at the hospital? He can go see him, right?” Isabelle started for her room.

“Isabelle… I’m afraid… Max… Alex is dead.”

“No. No, no, no, no, no. No, that’s impossible.” Jim looked at Max.

“Liz, was in the car too… she… she didn’t make it either. They died on impact.”

“Impact?”

“The car hit some trees, they were going over 70 miles an hour…”

“Oh god! No… no, no, Max can save them, can’t you Max?” She grabbed her brother. “You can save them. You have to.”

He didn’t want to give them the details but even Jim knew deep in his heart that Max couldn’t have saved them.

“Where are they? When did it happen? We can meet you there.” She started for her room again but this time Jim caught her arm.

“Isabelle, I’m going to need you to listen to me. It looks as though they crashed some time around 1:30 am. The paramedics arrived on the scene at 2:06 am and they were already dead. They had to use the Jaws of Life to get the bodies out of the car and even then they were unable to fully remove the bodies until 4:15 am. Alex and Liz had been dead for over two hours then, it’s 5:30 now.”

“Why didn’t you call us? Why didn’t you call?” She couldn't lose hope. She couldn't let tears fall though they began to fall rapidly none the less.

Jim looked down at his boots, tears began to cloud his eyes, “I was out with Miss Deluca, and Hanson couldn’t get a hold of me, he sent an officer out to find me.”

Isabelle jerked away from him, “you’ve known for more than AN HOUR AND YOU DIDN’T CALL?”

“Isabelle!” Diane and Philip jumped up from the couch.

“No… NO!!” She screamed, “He should have called! YOU SHOULD HAVE CALLED!!!”

“Isabelle! I couldn’t! They were already confirmed dead, their bodies were… are… there is no way anyone could believe… I had to bring the Parker’s and the Whitman’s to confirm the bodies, they have already seen them. Believe me when I say, Max couldn’t have saved them.”

“Max? God damnit aren’t you going to say anything?” she cried. Max simply stood there, staring at Jim. “Max?” Isabelle hit his chest. He just continued to stare at Jim. “MAX!” She began to pound her fists against him. He slowly turned his head down towards her.

What was he supposed to say? How was he supposed to feel? He couldn’t process the word. Feelings. He felt… nothing. Nothing but emptiness, nothing.

The connection was dead.

Dead.

Nothing.

So... I have been trying to write an update for this but it's just not coming and I don't want to put up something I don't like. With that said, I'm going to have to put this fic on haitus until who knows. I can't find any sort of inspiration for this one and I wanted to do the Fall Challenge over at RH and I would feel guilty posting that story and not for this one. So until some muse comes at me then I can't update. Sorry guys.

hopefully this one for the challenge will be likable.

ek.