Chapter 12
It all happened in slow motion when a tall blonde and a lanky guy who assume as the unlikely couple of Alex and Isabel are smiling and walking towards us.
Then all of a sudden a mass of screeching blond curls squealing something unintelligible crashes into Max and latches its screaming orifice on to my boyfriend.
That BITCH is kissing my boyfriend!!!!!!
They are still kissing! I have to go, I have to be away. I go to run and run straight into Isabel Evans the sister, the very beautiful sister. I have tears in my eyes I can’t breathe but she says to me
“Turn around, look at him”
I can’t believe her that she would force me to look when she can see I don’t want to! that I hurt so much I can’t breathe. Her arm is on mine forcing me too look through my tears and the pain in my chest. It like a car accident you don’t want to look but you can’t tare you eyes away. But it was ok he was yelling! Max was yelling at that that... gerbil to get off him and that it was over!!!
“Max tells me everything Liz Parker!”
She just smirks and goes to hug Maria. This was the bitch? I stare bewildered at the woman who just confused me and saved me all at once. All of a sudden I see his eyes on mine those hazel eyes bore into mine.
“Liz I she just was on me I was so shocked I”
“Max its ok I understand just don’t let it happen again! These lips are mine now!!!”
“Yes mam”
And he kissed me he actually initiated a kiss and in front of everyone, I kiss him hard to wipe away the last traces of skank form those heavenly lips. I look to everyone Alex is grinning Maria giggles at my obvious embarrassment and Isabel actually smiled at us. Michael well he was a little angry and a little happy. But the glare and pout on that curly haired freak could trip her up!!!
We all start to walk always hand in hand with my man. Till we get to Maria’s mum van and we pack in the luggage. When I feel a tug on my hair, more like scalp pulling rip
“You may have him now bitch but watch out cause he is mine and will always be mine! You were just something to keep him warm till I got here!”
And she walks away and squeezes in to the small van.
“You ok Liz”
His arm around me he didn’t notice her threat
“Yeah I really like your friends “
I can see Tess glaring at us through the door, but Max wraps his arms around me and kisses my temple.
Feeling Max with me everything usually feels safe but the glare through that window sends a chill down my spine.
“You cold beautiful?”
“No Max I’m fine”
And I can’t help but blush at him calling me beautiful. I have to get used to the compliments. I can’t believe how sweet he is, he actually took of his jacket for me! Its way to big; but its leather and smells just like him.
Once we are all packed in the van and start to head off Alex speaks up talking to no one in particular
“So this is Roswell the home of the great alien crash”
“Alex it’s amazing the junk they have here, right Liz!!!”
Maria sounds like she can’t wait to show him the entire little town
“It’s all a big tourist trap! Just wait till you see the crashdown cafe”
“Max I actually work there and my dad owns it”
I said indecorously like he insulted my honor but he could tell I was joking with the smirk I wore so he just smiled at me.
“You own a restaurant???? yeahhhh free food Liz its official you’re my new best friend!!”
“Don’t mind Alex Liz its all about the food for him!”
Isabel says speaking up for the first time.
“It’s not all about ze food?”
He says in a snotty French accent and attacks Isabel’s neck. I can’t help but laugh out loud at his antics and the witty repertoire these guys have with each other.
I think I’m going to like these people!!!!!
soooo???? dont worry angst fans its coming soon i like to butter you up with sugar and then devour you with my evil ways mwahhhhhhhh. ok yep its over as alwasy keep reading and enjoying and always hit me with it hard
ChanniBella
breaking the habit (AU, M/L, Liz POV) ~{COMPLETE}~
Moderators: Anniepoo98, Rowedog, ISLANDGIRL5, Itzstacie, truelovepooh, FSU/MSW-94, Erina, Hunter, Forum Moderators
-
channi bella
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 83
- Joined: Sat Jan 10, 2004 12:55 am
- Location: Australia
-
channi bella
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 83
- Joined: Sat Jan 10, 2004 12:55 am
- Location: Australia
CHAPTER 13A
It’s been 2 weeks 2 weeks of actually feeling like a normal teenager. 2 weeks since I have actually picked up this journal and wrote in it. So much has happened and I haven’t written it down. Why? Because I forgot.
I forgot about the Liz who thinks too much into boring and insignificant little things. I forgot about the writing down every thing I hate about my life in my journal.
Because I like my life now it’s easy! I get along with all of Maria’s friends, Max and I are still going strong and Michael and I still are just us.
But that’s just it, I’m happy. I Elizabeth Claudia Parker I’m happy. My life is working. My days are filled with friends and laughter and my nights are not plagued with nightmares.
I awoke this morning with a chill; I had run out of toothpaste there’s no hot water and Agnes has called in sick so double shift! But that’s not it I have this feeling. I feel this odd displacement within myself.
I hope that this is not a bit of my old paranoia rearing its ugly head but I just have this feeling that something’s not right.
Putting down my journal and chalk it up to just me being weird and head down for the long day. Maria worked the morning with me but now she is off. We all had plans, so I have to break the news about me working.
Seeing them all squashed in a booth with Maria lying across Alex and Max, Isabel and Tess- who by the way has been distant but eerily nice this past weeks. I can’t help but smile at the picture they make; my friends
“Hey beautiful where grumpy?”
“Michael is upstairs Max on the phone talking to someone about his plumbing? Can I get you guys anything?”
“Nah there ok chica we want to leave soon so as soon as Agnes comes we will change and head off”
“Actually she isn’t coming in!!!”
“What Liz ohhh that’s too bad”
Can you believe that skank with her fake sincerity and fake boobs and blonde hair, she is already eyeing my boyfriend!!!! Thank god for Alex and his timing because god knows what would have been said
“Cant you call someone else in it won’t be the same without you oh oh oh close up early!!!”
“That’s sweet Alex but its ok you guys head out without me”
I here them talking it over but I get that feeling again, I don’t want to acknowledge it but I cant ignore the fear that comes with it. It’s like when you know someone’s behind you without looking.
“liz liz you ok ???”
“Yeah Isabel im fine I just….
The bell chimes above the doors
“Well now there is a customer and we can’t use my closing early idea!!!”
I don’t want to look I cant I hear there steps towards me I know that this is what I was worried about. I look up to Max my comfort and his eyes are on me concerned.
“Elizabeth?”
no it cant be I cant look……
“Liz are you ok girl?
Maria noticed my discomfort felt my fear; they all look at me like that. I can’t look though I cant bare to face the voice that I know is my mother……
WOW WERE DID I PULL THAT FROM ????? KEEP READING AND TELLING ME IF IM STILL ON THE NARROW ROAD TO CRAPLAND LUV YA FOR READING- KEEP DOING IT CHANNIBELLA
It’s been 2 weeks 2 weeks of actually feeling like a normal teenager. 2 weeks since I have actually picked up this journal and wrote in it. So much has happened and I haven’t written it down. Why? Because I forgot.
I forgot about the Liz who thinks too much into boring and insignificant little things. I forgot about the writing down every thing I hate about my life in my journal.
Because I like my life now it’s easy! I get along with all of Maria’s friends, Max and I are still going strong and Michael and I still are just us.
But that’s just it, I’m happy. I Elizabeth Claudia Parker I’m happy. My life is working. My days are filled with friends and laughter and my nights are not plagued with nightmares.
I awoke this morning with a chill; I had run out of toothpaste there’s no hot water and Agnes has called in sick so double shift! But that’s not it I have this feeling. I feel this odd displacement within myself.
I hope that this is not a bit of my old paranoia rearing its ugly head but I just have this feeling that something’s not right.
Putting down my journal and chalk it up to just me being weird and head down for the long day. Maria worked the morning with me but now she is off. We all had plans, so I have to break the news about me working.
Seeing them all squashed in a booth with Maria lying across Alex and Max, Isabel and Tess- who by the way has been distant but eerily nice this past weeks. I can’t help but smile at the picture they make; my friends
“Hey beautiful where grumpy?”
“Michael is upstairs Max on the phone talking to someone about his plumbing? Can I get you guys anything?”
“Nah there ok chica we want to leave soon so as soon as Agnes comes we will change and head off”
“Actually she isn’t coming in!!!”
“What Liz ohhh that’s too bad”
Can you believe that skank with her fake sincerity and fake boobs and blonde hair, she is already eyeing my boyfriend!!!! Thank god for Alex and his timing because god knows what would have been said
“Cant you call someone else in it won’t be the same without you oh oh oh close up early!!!”
“That’s sweet Alex but its ok you guys head out without me”
I here them talking it over but I get that feeling again, I don’t want to acknowledge it but I cant ignore the fear that comes with it. It’s like when you know someone’s behind you without looking.
“liz liz you ok ???”
“Yeah Isabel im fine I just….
The bell chimes above the doors
“Well now there is a customer and we can’t use my closing early idea!!!”
I don’t want to look I cant I hear there steps towards me I know that this is what I was worried about. I look up to Max my comfort and his eyes are on me concerned.
“Elizabeth?”
no it cant be I cant look……
“Liz are you ok girl?
Maria noticed my discomfort felt my fear; they all look at me like that. I can’t look though I cant bare to face the voice that I know is my mother……
WOW WERE DID I PULL THAT FROM ????? KEEP READING AND TELLING ME IF IM STILL ON THE NARROW ROAD TO CRAPLAND LUV YA FOR READING- KEEP DOING IT CHANNIBELLA
-
channi bella
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 83
- Joined: Sat Jan 10, 2004 12:55 am
- Location: Australia
chapter 13b
I can’t hear anything my ears are ringing, I’m trying to block out all these things Max’s questions the women who abandoned me standing right behind me. I just need to breathe I don’t want to breathe I don’t want this. I just need to focus I can’t see or hear anything right it all feels fuzzy. Just breathe it starting to clear and I hear Max voice standing next to me protecting me, when did he stand up?
“Who are you? What’s going on?”
I can feel his confusion and fear and I feel them all of there eyes on me staring at me judging me. But I feel her eyes on me but I can’t bring myself to look.
“I’m Nancy Parker; Elizabeth’s mum”
Silence I can hear Max’s breathing next to me, it gives me some comfort. Not enough
“It’s Liz”
Everyone’s silent when I speak it’s just a whisper but it was harsh. I turn to her see how she has aged; gracefully of course. Just a few more lines around the eyes and her hair a little darker. It has been 11 years since I have seen her
“Sorry”
You should be sorry you left me when I was six with an abusive father. I wished you would come back and take me away to a better life. Until I realized I didn’t want you to rescue me because you’re the one who sent me to hell.
”it’s Liz and you are not my mother, I don’t have a mother”
And I leave I cant deal I just walk not thinking not dealing just barely breathing. I think everyone is too stunned to move. I hope that hurt her I want her to hurt I want her to feel the pain of a thousand slaps, just like the ones he gave me when she left.
I’m back that empty shell of a once happy girl. But this time its worse I actually knew true happiness and friendship even love. I race up the stairs to my room I knock down Michael on my way
“Where’s the fire “
And I just run lock the doors all the doors all the windows. I go to the fridge grab a bottle of water and then my journal a blanket and head to the bathroom. I suffered such abuse in this room nights I spent crying in the dark to frightened to turn on the light, to in pain to go to bed. It’s ironic but it became my hideaway, my solace. .
WELL NEXT LITTLE PART THANKS FOR READING AND PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK EVERYONE PRETTY PRETTY PLEASE, WITH A CHERRY ON TOP!!!! LUV YA CHANNIBELLA
I can’t hear anything my ears are ringing, I’m trying to block out all these things Max’s questions the women who abandoned me standing right behind me. I just need to breathe I don’t want to breathe I don’t want this. I just need to focus I can’t see or hear anything right it all feels fuzzy. Just breathe it starting to clear and I hear Max voice standing next to me protecting me, when did he stand up?
“Who are you? What’s going on?”
I can feel his confusion and fear and I feel them all of there eyes on me staring at me judging me. But I feel her eyes on me but I can’t bring myself to look.
“I’m Nancy Parker; Elizabeth’s mum”
Silence I can hear Max’s breathing next to me, it gives me some comfort. Not enough
“It’s Liz”
Everyone’s silent when I speak it’s just a whisper but it was harsh. I turn to her see how she has aged; gracefully of course. Just a few more lines around the eyes and her hair a little darker. It has been 11 years since I have seen her
“Sorry”
You should be sorry you left me when I was six with an abusive father. I wished you would come back and take me away to a better life. Until I realized I didn’t want you to rescue me because you’re the one who sent me to hell.
”it’s Liz and you are not my mother, I don’t have a mother”
And I leave I cant deal I just walk not thinking not dealing just barely breathing. I think everyone is too stunned to move. I hope that hurt her I want her to hurt I want her to feel the pain of a thousand slaps, just like the ones he gave me when she left.
I’m back that empty shell of a once happy girl. But this time its worse I actually knew true happiness and friendship even love. I race up the stairs to my room I knock down Michael on my way
“Where’s the fire “
And I just run lock the doors all the doors all the windows. I go to the fridge grab a bottle of water and then my journal a blanket and head to the bathroom. I suffered such abuse in this room nights I spent crying in the dark to frightened to turn on the light, to in pain to go to bed. It’s ironic but it became my hideaway, my solace. .
WELL NEXT LITTLE PART THANKS FOR READING AND PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK EVERYONE PRETTY PRETTY PLEASE, WITH A CHERRY ON TOP!!!! LUV YA CHANNIBELLA
-
channi bella
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 83
- Joined: Sat Jan 10, 2004 12:55 am
- Location: Australia
hi im back read on
chapter 13c
Why is she here what does she want? Why now? I can hear them knocking on my door I hear tapping on the window. My name being called.
“Liz are you alright let us in”
“Please Liz we just want to talk lets someone help”
“Please I just we just need to know if you’re alright”
I hear this entire happening but it doesn’t register, I can hear it but I’m choosing not to listen. I just sit in the shower curled up to stunned to cry to hurt to move. I’m so confused I just need to shut off. Turns of my emotions don’t let them rule me. I’m just pathetic. I know I need to deal and there are so many people willing to help…. But I cant I want to be scared pathetic and alone that’s all dad said I’m good for.
“Liz please talk to us, I need you to tell me you’re alright please I cant…..”
Michael my strength for so long I hear his voice breaking. How can I do this to him? I promised I never hurt him never shut him out. We made a pact that we would always be together and never let anyone come between us no matter what. We even cut our fingers and smashed them together in a blood bond.
Standing up I need to take control of the situation of my self. I splash my face and stare at my reflection. I m no longer the scared little girl who dreams are centered on escape of an idealistic fantasy of living with a fictional mother. I’m not naive but I’ am scared but I think its ok. Life s scary but I will take the risk. I’m not her anymore.
I try and shout make my voice strong but it still breaks a little. I leave the bathroom but still inside with no one I tell him or her that I will be out in a minute. Silence but then I hear Maria.
“Ok girl we will wait downstairs for you, don’t be long ok”
“Ok”
And I hear them leave slowly and I start to breathe thanking the heavens for Maria.
I check myself in the mirror my skin is a pasty colour but I need to just go downstairs have the comfort of my friends and face my demons, my so called mother. I just hope she is not down there.
I don’t remember the stairs being this long before. I can hear the sole of my shoes slapping against the stairs and my hand brushing against the wall, makes the loudest noise. My senses are heightened I’m aware of what’s around me….
Michael and his protectiveness Max and co with there questions. These I know those I’m prepared for, but her? Why is she here? In what way is she going to hurt and abandon me now?
As I walk down I see Michael working and stressing, that was me I hurt him. I just walk up to him touch his shoulder he just turns and looks me up and down concerned and worried about what to say….
“Just calm down Michael I’m fine, I freaked yes and I have every right to that but I m ok”
And he just holds me hard. I’m grateful for the hug and support I see everyone looking at us in the kitchen. Isabel is smiling and holding Max who is also has relived face on.
“Hey cuddle bunnies In the kitchen if you hadn’t noticed we have a full house”
Breaking the heavy fog in the room with light humor, Maria with one line cleared the air. I noticed indeed we had a full house. Michael reluctantly went back to the grill and Maria brushed passed me whispering
“She’s gone”
Figures then I noticed for the first time who was helping wait tables.
I laughed so hard my tummy hurt I was nearly on the ground. Because there before me was one Alex Whitman with an alien apron and complete with the little headband antenna. He just turned to me with his little notebook and pen
“Yes?”
Max and Isabel all sat in the booth and were laughing too. I think the tension left we all needed a bit of comic relief. So I could do nothing but go over and kiss that mans cheek.
“ohhh Lizzy what was that for not that I’m complaining?”
“Nothing Alex you are just a true gentleman”
The others had stopped laughing and Alex just gave them a conceded look and walked away with a “humm” and a shake of his hips.
“Liz with your mother I….”
“Max not now I just it’s really busy I I will explain later please”
He was dying to know what was going on but I couldn’t focus on that now I just need to get through this shift. After that I will explain and probably sleep for a day because I already know this will drain me dry. I’m just not good with emotions.
sorry its been so long guys but its hard to be angry at your cheating ex boy when he was in a car accident over the weekend. but enough with the personal whatya think????? keep reading and giving me the feedback luv ya ChanniBella
chapter 13c
Why is she here what does she want? Why now? I can hear them knocking on my door I hear tapping on the window. My name being called.
“Liz are you alright let us in”
“Please Liz we just want to talk lets someone help”
“Please I just we just need to know if you’re alright”
I hear this entire happening but it doesn’t register, I can hear it but I’m choosing not to listen. I just sit in the shower curled up to stunned to cry to hurt to move. I’m so confused I just need to shut off. Turns of my emotions don’t let them rule me. I’m just pathetic. I know I need to deal and there are so many people willing to help…. But I cant I want to be scared pathetic and alone that’s all dad said I’m good for.
“Liz please talk to us, I need you to tell me you’re alright please I cant…..”
Michael my strength for so long I hear his voice breaking. How can I do this to him? I promised I never hurt him never shut him out. We made a pact that we would always be together and never let anyone come between us no matter what. We even cut our fingers and smashed them together in a blood bond.
Standing up I need to take control of the situation of my self. I splash my face and stare at my reflection. I m no longer the scared little girl who dreams are centered on escape of an idealistic fantasy of living with a fictional mother. I’m not naive but I’ am scared but I think its ok. Life s scary but I will take the risk. I’m not her anymore.
I try and shout make my voice strong but it still breaks a little. I leave the bathroom but still inside with no one I tell him or her that I will be out in a minute. Silence but then I hear Maria.
“Ok girl we will wait downstairs for you, don’t be long ok”
“Ok”
And I hear them leave slowly and I start to breathe thanking the heavens for Maria.
I check myself in the mirror my skin is a pasty colour but I need to just go downstairs have the comfort of my friends and face my demons, my so called mother. I just hope she is not down there.
I don’t remember the stairs being this long before. I can hear the sole of my shoes slapping against the stairs and my hand brushing against the wall, makes the loudest noise. My senses are heightened I’m aware of what’s around me….
Michael and his protectiveness Max and co with there questions. These I know those I’m prepared for, but her? Why is she here? In what way is she going to hurt and abandon me now?
As I walk down I see Michael working and stressing, that was me I hurt him. I just walk up to him touch his shoulder he just turns and looks me up and down concerned and worried about what to say….
“Just calm down Michael I’m fine, I freaked yes and I have every right to that but I m ok”
And he just holds me hard. I’m grateful for the hug and support I see everyone looking at us in the kitchen. Isabel is smiling and holding Max who is also has relived face on.
“Hey cuddle bunnies In the kitchen if you hadn’t noticed we have a full house”
Breaking the heavy fog in the room with light humor, Maria with one line cleared the air. I noticed indeed we had a full house. Michael reluctantly went back to the grill and Maria brushed passed me whispering
“She’s gone”
Figures then I noticed for the first time who was helping wait tables.
I laughed so hard my tummy hurt I was nearly on the ground. Because there before me was one Alex Whitman with an alien apron and complete with the little headband antenna. He just turned to me with his little notebook and pen
“Yes?”
Max and Isabel all sat in the booth and were laughing too. I think the tension left we all needed a bit of comic relief. So I could do nothing but go over and kiss that mans cheek.
“ohhh Lizzy what was that for not that I’m complaining?”
“Nothing Alex you are just a true gentleman”
The others had stopped laughing and Alex just gave them a conceded look and walked away with a “humm” and a shake of his hips.
“Liz with your mother I….”
“Max not now I just it’s really busy I I will explain later please”
He was dying to know what was going on but I couldn’t focus on that now I just need to get through this shift. After that I will explain and probably sleep for a day because I already know this will drain me dry. I’m just not good with emotions.
sorry its been so long guys but its hard to be angry at your cheating ex boy when he was in a car accident over the weekend. but enough with the personal whatya think????? keep reading and giving me the feedback luv ya ChanniBella
-
channi bella
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 83
- Joined: Sat Jan 10, 2004 12:55 am
- Location: Australia
chapter 14
The day was busy and passed all to fast. Everyone stuck around except Tess leaving saying something about soap opera dramas not good for her complexion; I don’t think any one really paid attention. But I was glad she was gone and now so was the last customer.
“ohhhh I think I’m going to die how can you work all day like that Liz?”
I don’t trust my voice just yet so I just shrug my shoulders and walk towards the back right into Michaels arms.
“You don’t have to tell them anything! I’m always here and I’m not going anywhere ever. Stuck with me for life.”
“Should Max and I be worried you two are hugging a lot?”
She said It lightly but looking at everyone I realise they are tired confused and want answers. I take a deep breath
“Today that women she was she’s my mother. She left a long time ago, when I was only little I…. You see… I. I haven’t seen her since I was 5 when she just didn’t come home and today was the first time I have seen her, soo I freaked”
“Understandable babe my dad packed up and did the same thing don’t apologies for having a little freak out if it was me, and that Grant Deluca just showed up I honestly wouldn’t know what to do”
Poor Maria its horrible but its different this is my mum the women who gave birth to me It s different somehow.
“I just I’m not a talk out your feelings kinda girl I want her to just tell me what she wants and move on! Can we not make a big deal out of this please?”
They all look a little hesitant and in some weird way that makes me stronger knowing that I have them.
“I’m still the same Liz you guys meet 2 weeks ago, I dealed with this a long time ago. I don’t want to bring it up again, bring back all that mixed emotions. I don’t want you guys looking at me differently just because of something that happened a long time ago”
Isabel stood up and hugged me then Alex did the same antenna and all.
"We don’t know you that well Liz but I think Alex will agree with me that you are our friend, we accept you for who you are!"
I think I’m going to cry I’m just stunned how someone can be so sweet and be branded a bitch.
"Ok so much emotional crap who wants ice cream, my treat!!!"
"whoo hoo Alex actually paying up I’m sooooo there"
I can’t say anything my mouth opens but I don’t speak, but I’m so grateful. I feel Max arms wrap around me. Maria smiles as she anticipates her free ice cream and Michael kisses my cheek.
"You guys go ahead I’m just going to hang here with Liz"
I smile at Max how can he know what I’m thinking what I want, I love this man. His arms are still around me when I try and lock up i just laugh.
"Max you have to let go of me so I can close up"
"Never; you are amazing you know that you are beyond amazing"
And he kisses me our kisses are so passionate so real and full of life. It’s like I can feel his emotions feel him become a part of me.
"mmmmmmmmmmmmm Max we haven’t kissed like this since the airport"
"That is a crime how could I have not been here with you like this I must have been stupid!"
"You were just busy with your friends and I have been busy too"
Little Eskimo kisses, it’s like we can’t stop touching each other.
"Stay with me tonight Max I don’t want to be alone will you just hold me?"
He looks shocked and I’m anxious and embarrassed….
"Forever"
thanks for reeading keep doing it please and giving me the feedback i crave. Strawbehrry Shortcake thanks for the advice, he is ok but its hard to turn of the emotions.... thanks for the advice though girl....
The day was busy and passed all to fast. Everyone stuck around except Tess leaving saying something about soap opera dramas not good for her complexion; I don’t think any one really paid attention. But I was glad she was gone and now so was the last customer.
“ohhhh I think I’m going to die how can you work all day like that Liz?”
I don’t trust my voice just yet so I just shrug my shoulders and walk towards the back right into Michaels arms.
“You don’t have to tell them anything! I’m always here and I’m not going anywhere ever. Stuck with me for life.”
“Should Max and I be worried you two are hugging a lot?”
She said It lightly but looking at everyone I realise they are tired confused and want answers. I take a deep breath
“Today that women she was she’s my mother. She left a long time ago, when I was only little I…. You see… I. I haven’t seen her since I was 5 when she just didn’t come home and today was the first time I have seen her, soo I freaked”
“Understandable babe my dad packed up and did the same thing don’t apologies for having a little freak out if it was me, and that Grant Deluca just showed up I honestly wouldn’t know what to do”
Poor Maria its horrible but its different this is my mum the women who gave birth to me It s different somehow.
“I just I’m not a talk out your feelings kinda girl I want her to just tell me what she wants and move on! Can we not make a big deal out of this please?”
They all look a little hesitant and in some weird way that makes me stronger knowing that I have them.
“I’m still the same Liz you guys meet 2 weeks ago, I dealed with this a long time ago. I don’t want to bring it up again, bring back all that mixed emotions. I don’t want you guys looking at me differently just because of something that happened a long time ago”
Isabel stood up and hugged me then Alex did the same antenna and all.
"We don’t know you that well Liz but I think Alex will agree with me that you are our friend, we accept you for who you are!"
I think I’m going to cry I’m just stunned how someone can be so sweet and be branded a bitch.
"Ok so much emotional crap who wants ice cream, my treat!!!"
"whoo hoo Alex actually paying up I’m sooooo there"
I can’t say anything my mouth opens but I don’t speak, but I’m so grateful. I feel Max arms wrap around me. Maria smiles as she anticipates her free ice cream and Michael kisses my cheek.
"You guys go ahead I’m just going to hang here with Liz"
I smile at Max how can he know what I’m thinking what I want, I love this man. His arms are still around me when I try and lock up i just laugh.
"Max you have to let go of me so I can close up"
"Never; you are amazing you know that you are beyond amazing"
And he kisses me our kisses are so passionate so real and full of life. It’s like I can feel his emotions feel him become a part of me.
"mmmmmmmmmmmmm Max we haven’t kissed like this since the airport"
"That is a crime how could I have not been here with you like this I must have been stupid!"
"You were just busy with your friends and I have been busy too"
Little Eskimo kisses, it’s like we can’t stop touching each other.
"Stay with me tonight Max I don’t want to be alone will you just hold me?"
He looks shocked and I’m anxious and embarrassed….
"Forever"
thanks for reeading keep doing it please and giving me the feedback i crave. Strawbehrry Shortcake thanks for the advice, he is ok but its hard to turn of the emotions.... thanks for the advice though girl....
-
channi bella
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 83
- Joined: Sat Jan 10, 2004 12:55 am
- Location: Australia
chapter 15
I don’t know what mad me so brazen downstairs but now he is standing in my apartment and I’m lingering in the shower too scared to come out. I asked him to spend the night god I sound like a desperate horny skank!!
He doesn’t think that no he knows me. Oh god he doesn’t expect me to well you know….he is beautiful and I know now that I love him whole heartily. Maybe I should?? Oh god Liz listen to yourself considering doing IT when you can’t even say the actual words!!! Pathetic
Ok need to get out of the bathroom. I feel a little dorky in my pinstriped men’s pjs but they are comfy and if he cant accept me like this then stuff him. Ok here goes nothing; I’m strong brave beautiful Liz parker no need to be afraid of my own boyfriend……
“slughyrhhhhg”
Yes I actually made a sound like that because my words cant piece together my thoughts are all jumbled because all I see is skin golden gloriuous skin.
“Liz????”
I shake my head even though now I get a good view of the delicious front and still can’t speak words not working yum chest.
“Uh-hm”
“Are you ok”
I’m pretty sure I’m drooling. Need to speak get control over functions. I just shake my head and avoid the naked skin before me.
“Yeah I’m just tired”
He just smirks oblivious which makes it all the more sexier (if that’s even possible) and crawl into bed. He seems awkward when I snuggle under the covers.
“Um I took my shirt off I hope that’s ok its just these nights are really dry and I get hot easy I can put it back on if you wan…”
“NO its fine”
Whoa did I just cut in. he gets under the covers and we lay there side by side not touching, like the awkward sexually frustrated teens we are. I know nothings going to happen but this is like one of the most erotic moments of my life- well so far.
“My mum is my best friend we talk bout everything and I’m really close to my dad. My parents are my rock I don’t know what it would be like not having family? I can’t imagine?”
“I never really had family until Michael. He had a hard life and no family, my dad and I don’t get along at all. But me and Michael he is my best friend my foundation so he is my family….”
When I started talking I didn’t realize but my voice had taken a wistful tone and Max and moved onto hi side looking down on me his head rested on his arm. His very nice arm.
“If you could be a cookie what sort of cookie would you be?Dumbfounded I look into those eyes and crack up at the sincerity in them. I just bust out laughing
“What it’s a serious question I’m just surprised Alex hasn’t asked you yet?”
“I would be….. Ha I don’t know ummm…. oh I know double choc cookies, you know those chocolate ones with the white choc chips mmmmmmm”
“Oh good choice! I would be just plain sugar cookies”
“Why is that Mr. Evans “
“Well because I’m sweet and every one loves me!”
“Well I do love sugar cookies”
“See everyone loves me”
“I mean it Max I do love sugar cookies”
He just looks at me down at me and I can’t look up at him nervous at the fact I basically told him I loved him. I feel his fingers on my chin raising my face to his. He is so close now I have tears in my eyes from the seriousness of this moment. I have never told anyone I loved them before.
“I love double choc cookies”
And I just release that breathe I have been holding and loose it again with the implications of what just happened he smiles and kisses me. I let the tears fall freely. My day has gone from bad to blissful.
so new part out now a little sweet part to break up the angsty me. whatya think tell me tell me tell me tell me!!!!!! ok sorry little anxious but keep reading please luv ya all ChanniBella
I don’t know what mad me so brazen downstairs but now he is standing in my apartment and I’m lingering in the shower too scared to come out. I asked him to spend the night god I sound like a desperate horny skank!!
He doesn’t think that no he knows me. Oh god he doesn’t expect me to well you know….he is beautiful and I know now that I love him whole heartily. Maybe I should?? Oh god Liz listen to yourself considering doing IT when you can’t even say the actual words!!! Pathetic
Ok need to get out of the bathroom. I feel a little dorky in my pinstriped men’s pjs but they are comfy and if he cant accept me like this then stuff him. Ok here goes nothing; I’m strong brave beautiful Liz parker no need to be afraid of my own boyfriend……
“slughyrhhhhg”
Yes I actually made a sound like that because my words cant piece together my thoughts are all jumbled because all I see is skin golden gloriuous skin.
“Liz????”
I shake my head even though now I get a good view of the delicious front and still can’t speak words not working yum chest.
“Uh-hm”
“Are you ok”
I’m pretty sure I’m drooling. Need to speak get control over functions. I just shake my head and avoid the naked skin before me.
“Yeah I’m just tired”
He just smirks oblivious which makes it all the more sexier (if that’s even possible) and crawl into bed. He seems awkward when I snuggle under the covers.
“Um I took my shirt off I hope that’s ok its just these nights are really dry and I get hot easy I can put it back on if you wan…”
“NO its fine”
Whoa did I just cut in. he gets under the covers and we lay there side by side not touching, like the awkward sexually frustrated teens we are. I know nothings going to happen but this is like one of the most erotic moments of my life- well so far.
“My mum is my best friend we talk bout everything and I’m really close to my dad. My parents are my rock I don’t know what it would be like not having family? I can’t imagine?”
“I never really had family until Michael. He had a hard life and no family, my dad and I don’t get along at all. But me and Michael he is my best friend my foundation so he is my family….”
When I started talking I didn’t realize but my voice had taken a wistful tone and Max and moved onto hi side looking down on me his head rested on his arm. His very nice arm.
“If you could be a cookie what sort of cookie would you be?Dumbfounded I look into those eyes and crack up at the sincerity in them. I just bust out laughing
“What it’s a serious question I’m just surprised Alex hasn’t asked you yet?”
“I would be….. Ha I don’t know ummm…. oh I know double choc cookies, you know those chocolate ones with the white choc chips mmmmmmm”
“Oh good choice! I would be just plain sugar cookies”
“Why is that Mr. Evans “
“Well because I’m sweet and every one loves me!”
“Well I do love sugar cookies”
“See everyone loves me”
“I mean it Max I do love sugar cookies”
He just looks at me down at me and I can’t look up at him nervous at the fact I basically told him I loved him. I feel his fingers on my chin raising my face to his. He is so close now I have tears in my eyes from the seriousness of this moment. I have never told anyone I loved them before.
“I love double choc cookies”
And I just release that breathe I have been holding and loose it again with the implications of what just happened he smiles and kisses me. I let the tears fall freely. My day has gone from bad to blissful.
so new part out now a little sweet part to break up the angsty me. whatya think tell me tell me tell me tell me!!!!!! ok sorry little anxious but keep reading please luv ya all ChanniBella
-
channi bella
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 83
- Joined: Sat Jan 10, 2004 12:55 am
- Location: Australia
chapter 16
I feel asleep I was only 9 and exhausted, but I forgot. I forgot to clean the dishes after I cooked for him. I never felt such pain as being thrown across the room; he picked me up like a rag and tossed me over the couch. I never felt so much pain until he stood above me with the dirty dishes and smashed them on top of me one by one.
“DADDY NO”
“Liz???? Sh sh sh its ok”
Max looking at me scared and worried his eyes always express so much. I had a nightmare well memory. Well I was actually happy for a couple of hours I was waiting for the pain.
I can’t stop shaking I know max is there but all I can think of is the pain and the noise it was so loud. I still remember the plates shattering over my legs the glass in my hair.
“Liz baby its ok it was just a nightmare shhh its ok I got you!”
“That’s just it Max it wasn’t just a nightmare!”
hes confused one minute I’m a shaking slobbery mess and now I’m angry! Welcome to my world. I get out of bed and pace I automatically check the windows and the door, I have this thing about people getting in.
“Liz?”
He doesn’t understand I don’t understand! I feel like there is a huge weight on my chest I want to tell him. Tell him my father was an abusive drunk. Will he be scared? Will he still want me after knowing my mother didn’t want me and my dad just used me as a punching bag? Tears fill my eyes I just look at him; sitting up in my bed the place were we admitted our feelings not hours ago, I open my mouth to speak and can’t make the sounds
“Liz I don’t know what’s wrong but you can tell me anything”
I’m ready terrified but ready to let him know I have never told anyone but Michael but he understands he can relate. Max has had a good life to I need to burden him with my troubled past.
should i keep this going?? i dont know anymore feedback is very important i need the love keep reading please ChanniBella
I feel asleep I was only 9 and exhausted, but I forgot. I forgot to clean the dishes after I cooked for him. I never felt such pain as being thrown across the room; he picked me up like a rag and tossed me over the couch. I never felt so much pain until he stood above me with the dirty dishes and smashed them on top of me one by one.
“DADDY NO”
“Liz???? Sh sh sh its ok”
Max looking at me scared and worried his eyes always express so much. I had a nightmare well memory. Well I was actually happy for a couple of hours I was waiting for the pain.
I can’t stop shaking I know max is there but all I can think of is the pain and the noise it was so loud. I still remember the plates shattering over my legs the glass in my hair.
“Liz baby its ok it was just a nightmare shhh its ok I got you!”
“That’s just it Max it wasn’t just a nightmare!”
hes confused one minute I’m a shaking slobbery mess and now I’m angry! Welcome to my world. I get out of bed and pace I automatically check the windows and the door, I have this thing about people getting in.
“Liz?”
He doesn’t understand I don’t understand! I feel like there is a huge weight on my chest I want to tell him. Tell him my father was an abusive drunk. Will he be scared? Will he still want me after knowing my mother didn’t want me and my dad just used me as a punching bag? Tears fill my eyes I just look at him; sitting up in my bed the place were we admitted our feelings not hours ago, I open my mouth to speak and can’t make the sounds
“Liz I don’t know what’s wrong but you can tell me anything”
I’m ready terrified but ready to let him know I have never told anyone but Michael but he understands he can relate. Max has had a good life to I need to burden him with my troubled past.
should i keep this going?? i dont know anymore feedback is very important i need the love keep reading please ChanniBella
-
channi bella
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 83
- Joined: Sat Jan 10, 2004 12:55 am
- Location: Australia
Hey guys thanks for reading new little bit to tantalise those tatse buds keep you begging for more! thanks to everyone for the feedback and
Behrsgirl77 thanks for the feedback and the love your the best enjoy all and please tell me what you think! everyone give me some love, feel free to PM me keep enjoying...
chapter 17a
“I……..
And I can’t take it I brake down and cry he is out of the bed and in my arms before my sobs could brake free.
“You never met me dad, I still live with him he’s away now but if I tell you, Max you have to promise not to tell anyone”
“Liz I don’t understand?
“Max you have to promise! Swear it you won’t tell anyone?”
“Liz please I don’t understand what’s wrong?”
“My dad he he was angry he blamed me for her leaving I was just a kid I don’t….. I mean it was never that bad…. He I it wasn’t his fault he didn’t mean it he didn’t mean too….”
“Didn’t mean too what Liz?”
I can’t look at him but I felt the intensity of his eyes on me. I started and I had to finish no lore lies no more secrets...
“Didn’t mean to what??”
His voice is harsh and scratchy like he’s trying to control his emotions. He knows! I don’t think he wants to believe it. He wants me to prove him wrong, sorry Max.
“Hit me hurt me he my dad he didn’t mean to Max I swear it, just when she left and I was always there under him around him and he was angry and I was just in the way…”
He doesn’t say anything he just holds me while I cry. Silence I can’t bear it so I just shut my eyes and shut myself off. Sleep my only escape in this life.
what do you think?????????? please be brutly honest
Behrsgirl77 thanks for the feedback and the love your the best enjoy all and please tell me what you think! everyone give me some love, feel free to PM me keep enjoying...
chapter 17a
“I……..
And I can’t take it I brake down and cry he is out of the bed and in my arms before my sobs could brake free.
“You never met me dad, I still live with him he’s away now but if I tell you, Max you have to promise not to tell anyone”
“Liz I don’t understand?
“Max you have to promise! Swear it you won’t tell anyone?”
“Liz please I don’t understand what’s wrong?”
“My dad he he was angry he blamed me for her leaving I was just a kid I don’t….. I mean it was never that bad…. He I it wasn’t his fault he didn’t mean it he didn’t mean too….”
“Didn’t mean too what Liz?”
I can’t look at him but I felt the intensity of his eyes on me. I started and I had to finish no lore lies no more secrets...
“Didn’t mean to what??”
His voice is harsh and scratchy like he’s trying to control his emotions. He knows! I don’t think he wants to believe it. He wants me to prove him wrong, sorry Max.
“Hit me hurt me he my dad he didn’t mean to Max I swear it, just when she left and I was always there under him around him and he was angry and I was just in the way…”
He doesn’t say anything he just holds me while I cry. Silence I can’t bear it so I just shut my eyes and shut myself off. Sleep my only escape in this life.
what do you think?????????? please be brutly honest
-
channi bella
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 83
- Joined: Sat Jan 10, 2004 12:55 am
- Location: Australia
Hey guys just another little part. i enjoy being a tease, i will post more as when i get back from work. thanks for everyone who has ever responded and hi Anya glad you found me lil story enjoy. keep reading everyone and hit me with that feedback stuff cause baby im addicted.
chapter 17b
I awoke to find myself alone. Max knew who I was now I shared my secrets and I wake up alone. I don’t know what to do? I get out of bed my body aching in protest I look around his clothes are gone. Not even a note. I search the house for him with my last thread of hope and find I’m completely alone, the way it should have been.
Why did I think he would stick around knowing the baggage I have knowing that my father was right I’m nothing but a waste of space.
I look around I’m standing in the middle of my apartment waiting for something, someone to be here for me tell me what I should do?? I m stuck here in this moment were I dared to let someone in and they left me.
I will just wait right here wait for him to come back. Maybe he went back to Maria’s to get clean clothes and tell her were he was all night. Or maybe he went to get some breakfast. He works out a lot maybe he went for a run?????. I will just wait here for him he could call or comeback I will wait right here.
It’s been three hours and I’m still sitting in the same spot waiting for him to come back to me. I can’t breathe I can’t see anything I don’t hear a thing but I feel. I just feel so much pain it’s almost physical. Why Max why couldn’t you love me and accept me why did you leave me.
That’s when it happens I realize I brought this all on myself I have to stop being a pathetic slobbering brat and realize I’m ment to be alone. That if my own parents couldn’t love me why would anyone else…
I feel it now the contents of my stomach swishing around and I have to move because I can’t mess up the floor, he will kill me. And I throw up, I let go of all that’s inside me.
well?????????? give it to me ChanniBella
chapter 17b
I awoke to find myself alone. Max knew who I was now I shared my secrets and I wake up alone. I don’t know what to do? I get out of bed my body aching in protest I look around his clothes are gone. Not even a note. I search the house for him with my last thread of hope and find I’m completely alone, the way it should have been.
Why did I think he would stick around knowing the baggage I have knowing that my father was right I’m nothing but a waste of space.
I look around I’m standing in the middle of my apartment waiting for something, someone to be here for me tell me what I should do?? I m stuck here in this moment were I dared to let someone in and they left me.
I will just wait right here wait for him to come back. Maybe he went back to Maria’s to get clean clothes and tell her were he was all night. Or maybe he went to get some breakfast. He works out a lot maybe he went for a run?????. I will just wait here for him he could call or comeback I will wait right here.
It’s been three hours and I’m still sitting in the same spot waiting for him to come back to me. I can’t breathe I can’t see anything I don’t hear a thing but I feel. I just feel so much pain it’s almost physical. Why Max why couldn’t you love me and accept me why did you leave me.
That’s when it happens I realize I brought this all on myself I have to stop being a pathetic slobbering brat and realize I’m ment to be alone. That if my own parents couldn’t love me why would anyone else…
I feel it now the contents of my stomach swishing around and I have to move because I can’t mess up the floor, he will kill me. And I throw up, I let go of all that’s inside me.
well?????????? give it to me ChanniBella
-
channi bella
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 83
- Joined: Sat Jan 10, 2004 12:55 am
- Location: Australia
hi all read me read me read me read me......
chapter 17c
I stay on the floor of my bathroom where I just emptied everything inside of me. Where my father used to lock me up. I can’t move I feel dizzy my head feels heavy and my body feels weightless. I crawl over to the basin and pull myself up, I look at my reflection and I don’t know what to think. I’m pasty yellowish colour my eyes are swollen and my lips are dry, I have vomit on my top.
I take of my shirt and my pants I catch a glimpse of my naked body in the mirror and I look at it in disgust. I just slam my hand against it and turn away from my naked reflection. The mirror didn’t brake I don’t have the strength to walk let alone smash glass. I step in the shower the water is cold but I like it I can feel it.
Turning in the shower I see it again what I look like in the mirror I hat that image I hate that person so I throw my shampoo bottle at it. This time its smashes and its good because I cant see me anymore.
I step out of the shower I feel little piece of glass cutting in to my feet but I don’t notice it. Wrapping my robe tight against my body and roughly drying my hair with the towel I get out of that room. I sit on my bed ironically the place were we confessed our love the place he held me all night the place where he left me.
Music I need music loud music so I don’t hear my father screaming and don’t hear my own thoughts and insecurities I don’t hear Max’s sweet voice telling me I’m Beautiful telling me he loves me. Loud sounds of linkin park filter through my room through my head and get lost in there lyrics.
well???????????????? tell me tell me i was tuck at my friends house so i handwrote theses next parts. tell me how it is??????????? luv ya keep reading ChanniBella
chapter 17c
I stay on the floor of my bathroom where I just emptied everything inside of me. Where my father used to lock me up. I can’t move I feel dizzy my head feels heavy and my body feels weightless. I crawl over to the basin and pull myself up, I look at my reflection and I don’t know what to think. I’m pasty yellowish colour my eyes are swollen and my lips are dry, I have vomit on my top.
I take of my shirt and my pants I catch a glimpse of my naked body in the mirror and I look at it in disgust. I just slam my hand against it and turn away from my naked reflection. The mirror didn’t brake I don’t have the strength to walk let alone smash glass. I step in the shower the water is cold but I like it I can feel it.
Turning in the shower I see it again what I look like in the mirror I hat that image I hate that person so I throw my shampoo bottle at it. This time its smashes and its good because I cant see me anymore.
I step out of the shower I feel little piece of glass cutting in to my feet but I don’t notice it. Wrapping my robe tight against my body and roughly drying my hair with the towel I get out of that room. I sit on my bed ironically the place were we confessed our love the place he held me all night the place where he left me.
Music I need music loud music so I don’t hear my father screaming and don’t hear my own thoughts and insecurities I don’t hear Max’s sweet voice telling me I’m Beautiful telling me he loves me. Loud sounds of linkin park filter through my room through my head and get lost in there lyrics.
well???????????????? tell me tell me i was tuck at my friends house so i handwrote theses next parts. tell me how it is??????????? luv ya keep reading ChanniBella