Roswell Fanatics

OOC: don't know how good this is, but hopefully it works. I was trying to make it longer, but all I could do was add the last paragraph

~Alex~

I almost think I’m dreaming as I see Isabel begin to nod, and the sensation of her touch as she wraps her arms around my neck makes me think that if I’m not dreaming…I’m in heaven…

Then she speaks though, and it dawns on me that this is really happening… “I’d like that, Alex…” She tells me softly.

I feel a smile spreading over my face, but she’s not finished yet. “As much as I fear hurting you…I can’t deny wanting to be with you anymore…”

Does she know how long I have dreamt of hearing her say that…?

I want to respond, but in all honestly I’m not too sure how, and in the end I’m spared from the need of doing so as Isabel takes the initiative, leaning towards me and pressing her lips against mine. I kiss her back for a short sweet moment, gently drawing her into my arms. “I love you…” I murmur softly as I pull away slightly and look at her. This is my dream come true, and I just hope she doesn’t begin to push me away again.

I know things aren’t easy for her…I know things aren’t simple… But like Liz with Max, and Maria with Michael – even if the two of them don’t seem to realise it at the moment, I want to be there to help her through it… Feelings aren’t something to be scared of, to push away… I don’t know whether Isabel ‘loves’ me or not…but I know what my feelings are, and I just hope she’ll be willing to give ‘us’ a try…

*Max*

“Max…I-I don’t want to make you feel awkward…but before we go back…there’s something I need to ask… I know that you said we needed to take a step back…that you needed to be able to focus… B-but do you think there’s any chance we could try again…?” Liz asks.

I hear Liz's question and I something inside me seems to react. She sounds so unsure and unhappy and I know I'm the one causing it. I've tried hard to do what I said, to step back and find my focus. After the scare with Michael, I was afraid that I was forgetting what was important, what was real. Me and Michael and Isabel and surviving here without being discovered. Being safe. Being careful. I forgot all that when Liz was shot and when she started to return my feelings, I started to get lost in that.

"Liz," I tell her, quietly. "I never wanted to stop. Just to slow down. The trouble is, I just don't know how to do that. When I'm with you, it's like there isn't anything-else and that's dangerous. I can't forget who I am or what I need to do to stay safe, to keep the others safe."

I see Liz's expression begin to fade from hopefullness to disappointment and I hurry to correct myself. I reach up for her face, caressessing her cheek. Liz grabs my wrist, holding it still, looking in my eyes as I continue... "But Liz, when I'm away from you, it's worse. I don't think I can keep this up any longer. I need to be with you, too. Not just because of what's happening to you, but because I love you. I can't stop that and I don't want to try." She releases my hand then, and I move it gently across her cheek.

OOC: formatting later, hope this works for you Isabelle

~Liz~

I look up into Max’s eyes, waiting for the answer that I both need, but also fear. I need to know if there is any chance for us, but I’m so scared that he will say no… I love him so much…

The expression on his face is not one that I can read…that I understand… He looks almost torn, as though tossing up two points of views and I can’t help hoping that the strongest will be in my favour…

Finally, he begins to answer me. “Liz…” He starts in a quiet voice. “I never wanted to stop…just to slow down.”

I swallow, remembering the night after Michael was ill when he said the same thing… He needed to step back…he never said stop, but that was what it turned into… We couldn’t seem to find a half way point… Friends…even being involved, but not completely falling into each other as we had done for those few days…

“The trouble is, I just don’t know how to do that. When I’m with you, it’s like there isn’t anything else and that’s dangerous… I can’t forget who I am, or what I need to do to keep safe, to keep the others safe…”

Those few words seem to extinguish the small amount of hope which I had allowed to build… He’s right, the way we ended up it was dangerous… I laugh bitterly inside. Whoever heard of loving someone too much… So much that it destroys you both…

I swallow and try and told back the tears which want to come. I know what I want, but I also understand what Max is saying…I can’t push him anymore…if this is his decision, I have to respect it…however hard that might be…
I go to step back, to move away, nodding silently. I can’t bring myself to say the words, but I want Max to know I won’t press him any further.

Before I can do this though…Max reaches for my face, stroking my cheek with his hand and I just can’t stand it…to know I’ll never have what I want…I can’t do this… To have him do this while saying ‘we’ can’t be is torment and it can’t continue… I grab his wrist, keeping it still a few millimetres from my skin.

His touches make me look into his eyes carefully though, almost confused, and as I do so, he continues. “But Liz, when I’m away from you, it’s worse. I don’t think I can keep this up any longer. I need to be with you, too. Not just because of what’s happening to yo, but because I love you, I can’t stop that and I don’t want to try…”

As his words slowly begain to sink in, my hand drops, releasing his wrist as it falls to my side. His gentle touches continue and it’s just like I’m in heaven. Is this really happening…? I take a breath and look up at him. “I love you too…” I echo his sentiments, leaning forward not to kiss him, but simply lean my head against his chest. Things are changing so much, I’m changing, but with him, I can face anything…

~*TESS*~

I stand in the dark shadow of a pine tree, watching the events unfolding before me. The human girl with more energy then she should have, the human girl with a different kind of energy then she should have, and Isabel, a girl like me give away her energy.
I can’t believe the others! How involved they are with humans. Nesado said that they might be, that they might not have been educated properly, but I have no idea it was this far gone. Isabel is kissing that boy, that boy who is defiantly not Michael. And Max! He is so focused on the little human girl who could have ruined everything with her little display of power. At first I’m surprised, but then I’m angry; angry at them for not missing me, for going on like I don’t exist. I’m angry at Nesado for not preparing me. I’m angry at the humans who distract them from their purpose here. I stand in the dark and fume, allowing my anger to gradually warm me from the inside out. Enjoying being angry at everyone and everything, allowing the anger to make me powerful. I’ll be forgotten and discarded no longer. I will take my place when the time is right, and all things will be as they shall be.

*Max*

“I love you too…” Liz says, leaning against my chest. I gently push the hair back from her face and then move my hand to the top of her head to smoothing her straight hair down over her shoulders. Not that it was in any way unkempt but just for an excuse to touch her, to comfort her.

"Don't worry," I tell her, kissing Liz gently on the top of her head. "We'll figure it out. I'll get Isabel to understand, somehow..." Dealing with Isabel and Michael might be harder than helping Liz get control of this strange new power, but it has to be done. Isabel should at least be possible. Michael - well, Michael might never come around. I think his middle name should be 'stubborn.'

No. Even as I think that, I remember the strange way he greeted Liz in the vision when we were healing him. Like, he was okay with her, afterall. I was never quite sure how real that was, but it felt real, at the time. Like it was much more real than his words. A truth living underneath his skin...

I shake my head as Liz turns her face up to mine. I kiss her gently and give her a soft smile. "I think we better get to the washroom before your dad sends out a search party."

OOC: going to leave formatting in favour of trying to get a few more posts out cos I know I'm behind, yet again sorry. I'll try and tidy up the formatting of my posts tomorrow evening. Hope this works for you Isabelle, tell me if you want me to change anything.

~Liz~

Such little small things, but every touch is amazing… I’ve missed Max so much… I understand what he said, and deep down I know he was right… We were getting in so deep, so fast, and we were forgetting about anything else…

The thing is, that we didn’t just take a step back did we… We stepped away, and as I saw him grow distant again, I felt as though my heart was being torn out…

Before the shooting, I didn’t really know Max, but I couldn’t go back to that now… I love him too much to go back to being casual acquaintances… I love him…

I know that Max can’t afford to forget the risk…I know this thing is bigger than us, but I have to believe we can find a way…

“Don’t worry…”

There’s Max’s soft voice… His gentle touch as he kisses the top of my head. I don’t move, wanting nothing more than to stay in his arms forever… I feel so safe…and it feels so right…

“We’ll figure it out. I’ll get Isabel to understand, somehow…”

I can hear a certain edge to his voice and I know full well this isn’t going to be easy. With Max’s help, with him there, I know that I will be able to control this power that I know is there inside me… Convincing Isabel and Michael…that could be more difficult…

I want to show them that they can trust me…rely on me… But then I let Michael down when he needed me didn’t I… I had to step back from that circle because I was scared…I was scared not of what the three of them were…I was scared of losing Max…

And in the end, I did because of that… He said he needed to step back, but that wasn’t what happened… He closed off again, he locked me out, and I felt as though I lost everything…

I need him…

I look up at him, silently questioning and I see him shake his head as though to wave away my fears. He dips his head and a moment later my his lips brush mine… And it’s just…heaven…

He smiles at me. “I think we better get to the washroom before your dad sends out a search party…”

I smile back at him, because it’s him, but it fails to make me laugh as it usually would. That talk with my father earlier is still fresh in my mind, and I can’t say I’m looking forward to going back and facing him again…

I take a breath and nod. “You’re right…” We begin to walk down the path again and I smile as I feel him slip his arm around my waist. I lean against him slightly as we go along and then pull away reluctantly as we reach the washroom. My hand lingers on his a moment as we walk up together. “I…uh…need to…” I gesture awkwardly to the building before hurrying away and slipping inside.

Pit toilets…G** Part of me wishes that my dad hadn’t found out about this stupid trip… But then, when I think about it, I know that if he hadn’t, I wouldn’t be here, and the I wouldn’t be with Max, so in the end it’s all worth it…

When I emerge a few minutes later, Max is stood in from of the sink and motions for me to join him. I nod and smile, walking over and setting my wash bag down on a ledge just above the taps. I rinse my hands and face quickly, shivering as the cold water splashes my face. “Ah that’s COLD!” I exclaim, pulling a face as I grab the small dry cloth from my bag and dry my face off quickly. I knew it would be cold, but that’s FREEZING!

When I’m done, Max pulls out his toothbrush and I do likewise. Although there’s more than one tap, I move up next to him, sharing the same one as he’s using, and can’t help smiling about the simple act. It might be silly, but it feels nice…sharing something like that…and I hope it will lots more in the future…

Short I know........


~Isabel~



As I was drawn further into Alex's embrace I felt my body relaxing, the tension in my shoulders and back easing slightly. When he pulls away a bit and looks at me, his murmured words cause a myriad of emotions to swim through me. “I love you…”

How can I respond to that? I don't know if that's what I'm feeling. I've never been good with knowing this sort of thing. I don't want to hurt him. Hearing him say he loves me caused me to feel a rush of warmth through me, but I just wasn't certain that what I felt was the same. I know that Alex is not the kind of guy that would say something he doesn't mean and there is no way I want to hurt him by saying something if I don't know if I mean it or not.

I threaded my hands in his hair as I lowered my gaze slightly, "I don't know the extent of how I feel, or what I feel, I don't want to say something unless I know completely how I feel." I told him, looking up to meet his eyes, "I care about you a great deal, Alex. I've tried to fight it, tried to ignore it, but love? I don't know. I've never loved anyone other then my family and Michael who is like a brother." Okay, so I sound like a sap, but it sort of feels good because as usual I don't have to be the eternal ice queen when I'm around Alex. Whether he realizes it or not, he has changed me by being in my life.

OOC: this isn't the longest either, but hopefully it works for you storm. I'm sorry about the other posts I owe, I'm trying to get them sorted, but some are easier than others I guess.

~Alex~

Isabel looks down, and for a moment I think I’ve just made a huge mistake… Why did I open myself up so much in order to allow myself to be crushed…? The answer is simple, I wanted her to know how I feel…

I take a breath, waiting, unsure what she’s going to say. The response which comes is hesitant and uncertain. I think she’s as worried about saying it, as I am about hearing it. It’s enough though…it’s more than enough… She might not say that she ‘loves’ me, but I don’t know that I really expected that… Hoped maybe, but I think really I knew that it would take time… If and when Isabel says it, I know she’ll mean it, and I just hope that day comes eventually…

For now, telling me she has feelings for me, that she cares about me, that’s enough… I just want to show her that I’m there for her… I smile softly, reaching to touch her cheek. “Isabel, I’m not asking you to say you love me…if or when you feel you can, well it will be the most wonderful sound to my ears, but I know that’s not going to happen overnight, and that’s ok… I know that it’s not easy for you to let people in, and I’m just so glad you decided to do so with me…” I trail off awkwardly, wondering if I’m making a complete mess of all this. “I guess what I’m trying to say Isabel, is that I’m willing to wait, for as long as it takes…” I look at her again, realising the time and remembering her earlier rush. “I guess you need to be getting back…” I comment, reaching down for her hand. “Just be careful…ok…?”

*Max*

Liz slips inside the Latrine so I take a moment to do the same on the other side. I've done a fair bit of camping with Michael while we were hunting for signs of the true crash or the pod chamber, but I never really like the pit toilets. But then, I guess nobody does. Our own one-time-use pits seem cleaner...

Isabel never wanted to be part of the overnight journies, but she did plenty of the day trips. The habit of Camping with Michael has become a convienent excuse for so many other unexpected outings - like the sudden trip to Atherton's...

When I'm done, I go to wash my hands, waiting a bit on Liz. She comes out only a moment later and I smile an inviation for her to join me. I laugh as she complains about the cold. "I thought you did this every year," I comment, although I'll have to admit, she's right. I actually used a bit of power to warm the water as it hit my hands although clearly Liz doesn't have the control to do that herself yet.

As we brush our teeth together, I get a feeling of cozy that makes me wish for a future of little moments like this. When my mouth is clean, I give her another smile. "Looking great," I tell her and then pause, considering our next step.

I slip my hand into hers as we walk. Quietly, I say, "I guess I should take you back to your dad, then. Isabel and I will be heading out in a half hour or less... Whenever enough people have settled in, including you-know-who." The sheriff is the biggest threat. I'm sure he'll be watching for an exit after we're in bed, but we have to try it anyway. "If you wanted to come with us you could just meet us up at the turtle rock. Whoever's there first can wait for the other as long as we stay out of sight..."

I'm not sure sneaking out is gonna be a good idea if Liz is already having trouble with her dad. On the other hand, I do want to keep an eye on these power surges. Not to mention how much I just like having her around....

OOC: tell me if you want me to change anything Isabelle

~Liz~

Max laughs at my comment about the water, pointing out that I do this every year. He’s right, but that doesn’t mean I enjoy it, and I have to say, I don’t remember it being that cold before. I used to enjoy it kinda…but that was always more for the spending time with dad than the actual camping… I’m not saying that I’m one of those girls who needs her make-up and hairdryer, but in general I do prefer having hot and cold running water and a proper bed.

As we finish cleaning our teeth, Max gives me another smile. “Looking great…” He tells me although I’m not too sure what to believe. It’s not like there’s a mirror to check though I guess and I simply shrug. “If you say so…” Of course I can’t help smiling back at him… I mean it’s Max, and just being around him like this, after the time we’ve spent apart recently…it’s wonderful…

We hang around a few more minutes, not really saying or doing anything, just enjoying being close I guess, until someone else appears. It’s no one I recognise, so can’t be from the school group but I guess it does remind us of the time. As the woman heads over in our direction, the two of us quickly pick up our stuff and head back towards the path together.

A few steps along, I feel Max slip his hand into mine and I smile, enjoying every little bit of this. We’re going to try again…he’s not pushing me away…

“I guess I should take you back to your dad…”

I bite my lip as I hear his words. Facing my dad again… My only hope is that he might have gone to bed by the time we get back…or that he’ll be talking to one of the other dads… Anything that means I don’t have to deal with his suspicions again, because I don’t know how I’ll manage not to completely lose it if he does…

“…then Isabel and I will be heading out in half an hour or less…Whenever enough people have settled in, including you-know-who…”

I nod understanding exactly who he means. They can’t afford for the Sheriff to see them that’s for sure. Of course while they’re gone it’s more important than ever that I don’t lose it…Max won’t be around to help if it gets bad…

I swallow nervously, knowing that could have really bad consequences but telling myself I can do this. I’ve brought it under control with help twice, and all I have to do is keep it under control…I just hope that won’t be as difficult as I fear…

I look up again and am surprised to see Max looking at me. “If you wanted to come with us you could just meet us up at the turtle rock…”

Come with…? Two hours earlier Max wouldn’t have dreamt of saying that… Even after my first little power display it wasn’t anything he voiced even if he might have been thinking it… I guess that shows how much this changes things…

“Whoever’s there first can wait for the other as long as we stay out of sight…”

I nod slightly. I’m not too sure this is a great idea given that my dad’s already on the war path, but if I stay back, and I have a problem…if I lose it and someone gets hurt, I would never forgive myself… Besides, I said that I wanted to help him…I do want to be with Max…and this is one way of doing that… I chew my lip a moment and nod again. “Sure…I’ll be there…” I tell him softly. I don’t exactly know how I’ll get out without alerting Maria, or even my dad, but I’ll find a way…I want to do this with him…