Carolyn: Michael has just made the biggest mistake of his life and of course he already regrets it.
Of course. He knows his heart isn't into it 100%. It's like he's said . . . he loves Sarah, but Maria is the love of his life.
WHAT A MESS.......
Oh, you can say that again.
Don't know what to think about Liz and Alex.......going on a date. Maybe time will tell.
Maybe.
Sara: OMG. I think I would have thrown up!!!!
Me, too. I can't even imagine how it would feel to not only find out the guy you love is marrying someone else, but that he gave your ring to her, too.
MICHAEL YOU IDIOT!!! AHHH!
That deserves all caps.
Thanks for reading and leaving feedback!
Part 53
The shower. Every girl’s favorite place to cry.
Maria kept to herself for much of the night, which was easy enough to do, because Max and Dylan were slaves to the Xbox again. She tried not to say much, because she was worried that if she said anything, they’d sense how upset she was. Or at least Max would. Dylan was too little to sense that kind of thing.
By the time she was able to get in the shower and let it all out, she felt . . . even worse than she had earlier, if that was possible. Now that she’d had some time to think about it, it was really sinking in. Michael was going to
marry Sarah. He would be her husband, and she would be his wife. They would start a family together someday, and their kids would be smart and beautiful.
Just thinking about it made her cry even harder. Even though she’d known this was coming, she hadn’t expected it to be so soon, and she hadn’t expected it to hurt so much. Maybe it wouldn’t have, if he’d just used a different ring. Why couldn’t he have at least done that?
As pathetic as it was, she couldn’t remember the last time she’d cried this hard. Maybe her first night away from Roswell, when all she’d been able to do was lie awake in bed, picturing how devastated Michael had looked when she’d driven away from him.
Now she wondered if that was how devastated
she had looked today.
“Oh god,” she cried, pressing both hands against the shower wall as the water poured down on her. This wasn’t right. She knew this shouldn’t have felt so excruciating. She should have been able to put aside her annoyance that he’d used the same ring and managed to be happy for him. Because this was what she’d wanted, right? This was why she’d broken up with him, so he could go out there in the world and find a relationship like this with a girl who wouldn’t be a burden.
But it hurt so much. And she
couldn’t stop crying, even though she wanted to.
The tears kept falling, but she managed to silence herself when she heard the bathroom door open. “Maria?” Max said.
Oh god, she thought, panicked. No, she couldn’t even look at him right now.
“Room for me in there?” he asked, probably already taking off his clothes.
“Um . . . actually, I’m just finishing up,” she said, her voice wavering. “And then I’m gonna go straight to bed.”
After a moment’s pause, he said, “Oh,” and then, “Okay.” He sounded disappointed, but he’d probably tell her he wasn’t. “I’ll just wait my turn then.”
She winced, regretting that she couldn’t just be honest with him about what she feeling right now. And why she was feeling it. “Sorry,” she apologized.
“No, it’s fine.” He opened the door and left the bathroom, shutting it firmly behind him.
Maria’s body jerked forward as another sob tore through her, as tears mixed with water on her cheeks. All this sadness inside was something she had to get out now, because when she stepped out of that shower, she had to bury it again.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Tess was singing when Michael stopped by the next day, and it was awful. He could hear how off-key she was even before he walked in the door.
“Baby, baby, baby, ooh!” she sang. “Like baby, baby, baby, nooo!” She was using a spatula as a microphone, dancing around and performing for no one while she washed the dishes.
“Really Tess?” he interrupted. “Bieber?”
She set the spatula back down in the water and held one hand to her stomach. “I’m singing to the twins.”
Twins. That was still unreal to him. “Yeah, I’m sure they love that.”
“It soothes them,” she insisted.
“Are you sure?”
She picked up a wet washcloth and flicked it at him. “Shut up, Michael.”
He chuckled.
Kyle came out of the bedroom a moment later, looking like his vintage self. Work-out clothes and a Patriots hat.
“Hey,” Michael said, “ready to go?”
“Yep. Are we walking?” Kyle asked.
“I can drive.”
Kyle shrugged. “I’d rather walk.”
Good, Michael thought. Kyle had done enough walking these past few months that it was pretty much back to normal for him now. Once in a while, his back spasmed and he had to sit down, but other than that . . . normal. Next came running, but that was going to be more of a gradual process.
“Alright, let’s go,” Michael said.
“Bye, honey.” Kyle stopped and gave Tess a kiss on the cheek first.
“Bye.” She smiled, and Michael thought she looked . . . genuinely happy. It was nice to see.
He was just about to follow Kyle out when Tess called him back. “Hey, Michael, wait.”
He took a few steps backward, veering into the kitchen. “Yes?”
“So . . .” She dried her hands off on a dishtowel and asked, “How’s it feel to be engaged?”
Oh, no, he thought. He didn’t want to talk about this. “Feels good,” he replied.
“Good. Just don’t be engaged for as long as Kyle and I have been. You guys should get married sooner rather than later. Like maybe this summer.”
“Well . . .” That just seemed
very soon. “We’ll see.”
Tess smiled and continued to babble on, “Sarah seems so happy. She loves the ring.”
“Does she?” Now that was something he
really didn’t want to talk about.
“Oh, yeah. You did a good job. It’s really pretty. Although . . .” She trailed off, sounding . . . almost skeptical or something. “I have to ask.”
“What?” His heart started to beat faster out of nervousness. He knew girls paid attention to this kind of thing, but she wouldn’t possibly remember, would she?
“Well, it’s just that it looks
so familiar,” she said, causing the hairs on the back of his neck to stand on end. “Like I remember seeing that same ring three years ago. On Maria’s finger.”
Oh, shit. He should have known this was coming. Of course Kyle wouldn’t recognize it, but Tess would. “She lost that ring,” he reminded her.
“Down the sink, right? I remember.”
“Yeah, so . . .” He felt absolutely no need to tell her the truth about where it had been or how it had found its way back, so he just kept up the lie. “It’s not the same, but it
is similar.”
“Okay,” she said. “I just wanted to make sure you didn’t propose to my best friend with a hand-me-down or anything.” She laughed as if it were a joke, but there was nothing funny about it to him.
“No,” he said, guilt swirling inside. “I wouldn’t do that.”
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Jake was almost a little
too well-behaved for Michael’s liking on Monday. They sat through his afternoon classes together, alternating with actual music on the iPod and mimicking music with things like pencil tapping and lap patting. It kept him pacified, for the most part, and when it was time to leave for the day, he actually gave Michael a hug. It was the first normal social interaction Michael had seen from the kid, so it was something to celebrate.
But he couldn’t celebrate, not with the mood he was in. All day, he’d been distracted, unable to
truly focus on Jake, or his workout with Kyle, or anything else he’d attempted to do. He could only think about one thing.
He’d just said goodbye to Jake when Dylan came waddling down the hall, a look of concentration on his face as he read something off of a crinkled piece of paper. He was so focused on it that he nearly ran into a few people.
“What you got there, Dylan?” Michael asked him.
He looked up and grumbled, “A note.”
“A note? From who?”
“Emily.”
“Emily? She’s in your class, right?”
“Uh-huh. Look.” Dylan handed him the note, and Michael only had to read the first sentence to know what it was about.
“Uh-oh, you’re in the big leagues now, buddy,” he cautioned. “This is a
love note.”
“She loves me?” Dylan sounded surprised.
“No. She just has a crush on you. Take it as a compliment. You’re a stud.”
He made a face of disgust. “But girls are weird.”
“They are,” Michael readily agreed. “But they’re also awesome.”
“Really?”
“Oh, yeah. Trust me, I would know. Girls like me, too.”
“Hmm.” Dylan smiled and took the note back from him, shoving it into his pocket. “My mom likes you,” he stated simply.
Michael fell silent, just staring at Dylan like an idiot. He wanted to ask what he meant by that, but . . . it was probably nothing.
“Bye, Micho!” Dylan chirped. With a little wave, he darted outside.
“Bye,” Michael whispered, watching him go. He scampered out to the loading and unloading zone of the parking lot, where Maria was waiting for him. She knelt down, and he ran straight into her arms and hugged her tightly. She looked happy. Happy to see him, at least. Probably not all that happy overall.
Even though this probably wasn’t the right time or the right place, Michael knew he had to seize the opportunity to talk to her, maybe set things straight. He couldn’t stand the thought that he’d upset her, but he knew he had. That look in her eyes yesterday when she’d seen that ring on Sarah’s hand . . . she’d seemed
so broken-hearted.
He hurried outside and got to her just as she was buckling Dylan into his car seat. “Maria. Can we talk?”
She shut the back door of her car and muttered, “No,” avoiding all eye contact with him as she walked around to the other side.
“Please?” he begged, following her.
She whirled around, hand resting on the driver’s side door handle. “No, Michael. There’s nothing to say.”
“Are you kidding?” he spat. “There’s a lot to say.”
She flapped her arms against her sides as if it were no big deal. “You’re engaged. It’s fine. Let’s just leave it at that.”
“But I--”
“Michael.” She stared at him sternly, as if she absolutely
refused to have this conversation. “Dylan’s in the car. Let’s not do this right now.”
But if not now, he thought,
when? This wasn’t exactly the kind of conversation they could have in the back of the classroom tomorrow. “Maria . . .”
“I don’t wanna talk about it,” she snapped. “Just leave me alone.”
I don’t want to, he thought. He wanted to talk to her, apologize, tell her it’d been a mistake. He’d never intended to use that ring again. It had just . . . it’d just happened.
She got in the car, and he was left with no choice but to step back up onto the sidewalk and wave sullenly at Dylan as she drove away. It wasn’t the first time she’d driven away from him, and at this rate, it probably wouldn’t be the last.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
“Knock, knock,” Liz said as she came into the house, holding Scarlet’s hand.
All nestled up on the couch, Maria managed a groggy, “Hey,” and a tired smiled.
“Wow, you look all settled in,” Liz remarked. She let go of her daughter’s hand, and Scarlet immediately ran for the Xbox controllers. Even though she didn’t know how to use them, she seemed to enjoy fiddling with the knobs and buttons whenever she was over there.
“Come, grab some couch,” Maria urged her friend, bringing her feet in to make some room. “This is where the party’s at.”
“Clearly.” Liz sat down, and Maria noticed how nice she looked. Full makeup and wavy glamorous hair. She even had on a maroon off-the-shoulder dress that looked new. Apparently this date tonight was a big deal.
“Where’s Dylan?” Liz asked.
“In his room doing homework,” Maria replied.
“How responsible.”
“Well, either that or he’s writing a note to this girl in his class.” She spotted him reading the note from Emily on the way home. She knew what was up.
“Romance?” Liz gasped. “In kindergarten?”
Maria rolled her eyes. “Whatever. Either way he’s writing, so it’s educational.”
Liz laughed lightly. “That’s one way to look at it.” Her eyes drifted over to Scarlet for a moment, and after telling her a few times not to chew on the Xbox controller, she returned her attention to Maria and deduced, “So I take it you finally checked Sarah’s Instagram.”
I must look really down in the dumps then, Maria thought, knowing she’d have to perk up before Max got home. “No, I didn’t,” she said, sitting up a bit. “But I heard the big news. They’re engaged.”
Liz nodded, then asked, “Who told you?”
“They did.”
Liz seemed surprised by that. “Face to face?”
“Mmm-hmm.” She doubted any of it had been planned. Michael would have wanted to tell her alone, and he would have tried like hell not to let her see that ring right away.
“How’d that go?” Liz asked.
Horrible, she thought. Even now, she wished she didn’t know about it. “It was weird, but . . .” She shrugged, trying to seem more at ease with it than she actually really was. “It’s fine. I’m happy for them.”
“Yeah, you look thrilled,” Liz noted sarcastically.
“I’m okay with it,” she insisted, only because she
had to be okay with it. “Here, show me those Instagram pics.”
“You sure?” Liz asked, hesitantly taking her phone out of her purse.
“Yes.”
Liz sighed. “Okay.” She slid her thumbs over the screen rapidly, and soon enough, she’d navigated to Sarah’s Instagram and handed the phone over to Maria.
“Cute,” Maria remarked, quelling her resentment when she looked at the first picture, which was the ring on Sarah’s finger. She scrolled to the next one, which was a selfie where Sarah was holding up her hand. “Cute.” The third was probably the hardest to look at, though, because Michael was standing behind her, his arms around her. “Super cute.” She handed the phone back to Liz and commented, “They’re like the perfect couple.”
“They do seem like a good match,” Liz agreed, putting her phone away again. “And that’s a nice ring.”
Maria swallowed hard, agreeing, “Sure is.” She wondered what Sarah would think if she found out she wasn’t the first girl to wear it, though. Surely then she wouldn’t be so eager to post all those photos online. Not that Maria ever planned on telling her. She wasn’t about to be that vindictive.
Itching to change the topic, Maria cleared her throat and asked Liz, “So what’s the sitch? Who you goin’ out with tonight?”
“Oh, you know . . .” Liz squirmed around a bit, then mumbled, “Alex.”
“Alex?” Maria echoed in astonishment. “Wait a minute, I thought you said he ran for the hills when you made a move on him.”
“He did, but . . . I don’t know, I guess he had a change of heart.”
Finally, Maria thought,
a little good news. “So you guys are
finally officially going out on a date?”
Liz blushed. “Yes.”
“Oh my god, it’s about time. I’m telling you, you two are meant to end up together.”
“Well, I’m not so sure about that,” Liz said, ever the skeptic. “And neither is he, so tonight’s really just about testing the waters and seeing if it’s even possible.”
“And if it’s not?” Maria asked, even though she was pretty sure there would be at least
some sparks tonight.
“Then we’ll just stay good friends,” Liz said, as if it were that simple. “At the end of the day, that’s really what means the most to me, you know?”
“Yeah,” Maria said, wishing she
did know. She wished her friendship with Michael was so strong, but it was just frustrating that, no matter how close they became, that friend level of their relationship just never did overpower the romantic one. “Well, I hope it goes well,” she said.
“Thanks,” Liz said. “And thanks for watching Scarlet.”
“No problem.” Maria looked at the little girl again, who was now singing some kind of song in her own language and rolling around on the floor. “Now
she’s super cute,” she said, wishing it was possible to be that little and carefree again.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Liz and Alex had no real plan in mind for their date night. The whole thing still felt sort of strange to Liz, so she dressed for the ambiguity and decided to just go with the flow. And the flow was good. First they stopped at one of Alex’s favorite restaurants for pizza, and after that, they just drove around and talked for a while. Eventually they ended up at The Cave, which was much less packed than it had been on the night of its grand reopening. They ordered drinks, and Liz even got Alex out on the dance floor for a bit. Even though he had two left feet, he didn’t act embarrassed. In fact, it was only when he literally bumped into one of his students out there that he decided to sit back down.
Once they’d had their fill of the club scene, they drove down the street to another bar, an older, less-crowded one. The had another round of drinks and played some pool, then sat and talked some more until they started to feel tired and decided to head home.
It really had been a nice night, and a great date, better than any date Liz had been on in a long time.
Alex drove her home and came inside with her, and that was the only point when it actually started to feel weird. Up until this point, she’d felt relatively normal, like she and Alex were just hanging out as friends. They hadn’t held hands or sat extra close together or flirted or anything. But now that the date was over, it almost seemed like . . . like there was an expectation. To kiss or something.
“Well, I had a great time,” he told her.
“Yeah, me too,” she agreed, setting her purse down on the couch. “I’m really glad we did this.”
“Yeah, it was fun.” He stuffed his hands in his pockets, suddenly looking nervous himself. Did he feel that same expectation? And if he did, would he do anything about it.
“So . . .” She flapped her arms against her sides, unsure of where to go from here. If Scarlet weren’t with Max and Maria tonight, she was sure Alex would have stuck around and played with her for a while if she was awake enough. If not that, he would have sat with her in the chair and rocked her while she slept. But it was just the two of them tonight.
“Well, I should probably get home,” he said, taking a few steps forward. “Unless . . .”
“Unless?” Was he seriously thinking about staying the night? He couldn’t be. That was way too . . . extreme.
He took his hands out of his pockets, reached out to take hers in his, and slowly leaned down, as if he were about to kiss her. Part of her wanted to take a step back, or tell him to stop, just because it felt too strange. Sure, they’d kissed before, slept together even, but that had been a long time ago. Before Max.
Max. The moment she thought of him, he managed to overshadow every amazing thing about this date tonight.
Even so, she closed her eyes and let Alex kiss her. She even tried kissing him back, because . . . well, it was worth a shot. But all she could think about was Max Evans, and how much she wished he was the guy doing this with her.
This wasn’t fair to Alex.
She pulled away sheepishly, wishing she hadn’t let that happen. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt his feelings. But when she caught sight of that knowing, resigned look on his face, she started to feel relieved, because it just seemed like they were on the same page.
“No,” he said.
“No,” she agreed. “I’m sorry.”
He shrugged. “Don’t be sorry. I get it.”
“I just don’t think . . .” She trailed off, sighing frustratedly. “There’s no . . .”
“Chemistry,” he filled in. “I know. At least not the romantic kind.”
“I wish there was,” she mumbled, sitting down on the couch. “It’d make things a lot easier.” This whole harboring feelings for her ex-boyfriend thing was growing very old very fast. And it didn’t help that he was with Maria, who really truly was one of her best friends.
“We can’t force it,” Alex said, sitting down beside her. “At least we gave it a shot, though. Now we know for sure there’s nothing there.”
“Nothing but a really solid friendship,” she said, smiling at him. “You really are my best friend, Alex. You know that, right?”
He smiled back at her, reaching over to pat her leg. “I know,” he said. “You’re my best friend, too.”
Growing up, she’d always thought she would end up marrying her best friend. But apparently that wouldn’t be the case. And honesty, at this point, she felt like she’d be lucky to ever get married at all. It was as if all she could do was compare every single guy to Max. Whether it was something subconscious or calculated, she always did it. And it wasn’t that Alex was inferior to Max in any way. It was just that Max had a hold of a part of her, and even through the ups and downs, that hold hadn’t loosened at all. If anything, it had tightened over the years.
“Can I ask you something?” he inquired suddenly.
“Sure.” He could ask her anything.
But what he
did ask . . . caught her off guard. “Are you still in love with Max?”
She froze momentarily, stunned. How did he know? Did he just know her really well, or was she obvious? Had anyone else asked her that question, she surely would have lied, but because it was Alex, she fessed up and told the truth. “Yeah. I am.”
Alex nodded, as if he’d already known the answer. But it was nice that he didn’t react judgmentally at all.
“What about you?” she questioned in return.
He chuckled and joked, “No, I’m not still in love with Max.”
“You know what I mean.”
“What, Leanna?” he filled in. “No, no, that’s over now.”
“Alex.” She gave him a look. “Not Leanna.” It was pretty obvious, to her, at least, that there was still a girl in his heart, and that girl wasn’t his ex-wife.
He took in a deep, shuddering breath, as though he didn’t want to own up to it, even though she already knew. “Who then?” he asked.
“Who else?” Max wasn’t the only Evans who had a magnetic pull over the opposite sex. “Isabel. Do you still have feelings for her?”
Alex was silent for a few seconds as he lowered his head and stared down at the floor. He didn’t seem proud to admit it, but at long last, he did. “Yeah,” he mumbled. “I don’t know why. But I think I always will.”
Liz nodded, understanding. What Alex felt for Isabel was hardly different than what she felt for Max. It was intense, constant, hard to explain. And unrequited.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
“Oh, Isabel!”
Isabel groaned when Courtney came up the stairs, singing her name at the top of her lungs. Wasn’t it too early to get up? It felt too early.
“Isabel!” Courtney exclaimed, throwing open the bedroom door. “Wake up! You’ve been sleeping all morning.”
“What?” Isabel forced her eyes open and squinted at the numbers on the bedside clock. The furthest number to the left was about three numbers over what it should have been. “Oh my god, I slept through class!” she fretted, sitting up. “Why didn’t my alarm go off?”
“Oh, I turned it off,” Courtney informed her.
“What? Why?”
“Well, we all had such a late night last night, and I figured you needed your sleep. But then you just
kept sleeping, and the boys went out, so now I’m really bored.”
Isabel groaned, running her hands through her hair. “You can’t do that, Courtney.” She already missed class enough this semester; she really couldn’t afford to miss anymore.
“It’s just college,” Courtney said. “It’s so pointless, Isabel. I mean, it’s not like you’re really gonna be a famous writer or anything.”
Thanks for that vote of confidence, Isabel thought sarcastically. Courtney was her friend and everything, but she was annoying as hell sometimes. Didn’t mean she was wrong, though. “No, I guess I’m not,” Isabel agreed sullenly. That dream had faded away, right along with Princeton.
“Now that you’re
finally up . . .” Courtney hopped onto the foot of the bed, looking like an excited puppy or something. “Guess what?”
“What?” Chances were, whatever Courtney was bursting at the seams to tell her, it wouldn’t be all that interesting.
“Michael got engaged.”
Isabel’s eyebrows show up.
Okay, she thought,
so I was wrong. That
was interesting. “Where’d you hear that from?” she asked.
“Friend of a friend . . . of a friend of a friend. Word gets around.”
“Huh.” Had it not already happened once before, it probably would have been more shocking. But still . . . it definitely threw Isabel for a loop. “Who’d he pop the question to this time?”
“His Asian girlfriend,” Courtney replied.
“Really?”
“Yeah. Why do you sound so surprised? She’s hot. I’d totally do her.”
“Yeah, she’s really pretty,” Isabel acknowledged—Michael didn’t really date ugly girls. “But . . .” There was just one problem that she could see. “I just didn’t think he’d ask her to marry him.”
“Oh, right,” Courtney said. “He
is more of the ‘hit it, don’t commit it’ type.”
Isabel shook her head. “No, I don’t think he has a problem with committing,” she said. “I just didn’t think he would. Not to her.”
“Why not?” Courtney asked.
Isabel laughed angrily, recalling all sorts of unpleasant memories of betrayal at his hands. “Because she’s not Maria.”
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
In desperate need of an energy boost, Michael stopped by the student union for coffee before class. He didn’t even know what exactly it was that he ordered, but the barista assured him it was full of caffeine. Taking one look at it, though, Michael was unimpressed. It seemed like a hell of a lot of foam and not a whole lot else.
“Hey, is there even any coffee in here?” he asked, a bit more demanding than he usually would have been. He wasn’t in a good mood today, which meant anything could set him off. This pathetic excuse for coffee could be that thing.
“Yeah, it’s exactly what you ordered,” the barista said.
“I ordered
coffee,” Michael snapped. “This is like air. I don’t wanna drink air.”
The barista just shrugged helplessly, clueless, and Michael was about to demand a refund. Or a new cup of coffee. Or
something. But all of a sudden, there was Isabel, sidling right up next to him, obviously about to make his morning even worse.
“Now, now, Michael, don’t be rude,” she scolded.
He rolled his eyes, stepping out of the line, and of course she followed him. “What do you want?” he grumbled.
“God, you’re in a bad mood,” she remarked. “I wouldn’t think someone who’s recently engaged would be so testy.”
He stopped and gave her a hard look. “Who the hell told you?”
“Just heard it through the grapevine.” She took his coffee right out of his hand and took a sip. “Mmm. Do you not want this then? ‘cause I’ll take it.”
“Whatever.” He turned to walk away, but she must have been feeling especially obnoxious today, because she scurried in front of him, blocking his progress.
“So are you really gonna do it?” she asked almost tauntingly. “Marry someone who’s not Maria?” She gasped exaggeratedly and brought her free hand up to cover her mouth. “Shocking.”
“Maria and I aren’t together,” he pointed out. “We haven’t been for a long time.”
“Right, but . . . I’m gonna assume you’re still in love with her, because you’re . . . well, you know . . .
you.”
Even if she was right, there was no way he’d have this conversation with her.
Hell no. He hadn’t even been able to have it with Kyle. “I’m in love with Sarah,” he informed her. “Deeply, truly, madly in love. That’s why I proposed to her.”
Isabel narrowed her eyes at him doubtfully. “Are you sure?”
No, he thought, but he didn’t miss a beat. “Yes. You see, that’s what happens when a guy loves a girl, Isabel. He asks her to marry him. Now, I don’t expect you to ever experience that, because the only thing your boyfriend loves is his porn business.”
She glared at him and deadpanned, “Funny.”
“But I do love Sarah, and I am gonna marry her. So I think what you should be saying is
congratulations.”
“Oh, I would congratulate you,” she said, “if I thought for a second you were gonna go through with it.”
God, Isabel Evans, you are such a bitch, he thought, rolling his eyes, pretending to
just be annoyed with her. But the truth was, he was unnerved, and not because of her attitude. Because of her skepticism.
“Goodbye, Isabel,” he said, pushing past her, eager to get out of there.
“I know I’m right, Michael!” she called after him as he walked away. “I know you!”
No, you don’t, he thought, trying his hardest to forget everything she’d just said.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Music class that day was pointless because Maria wasn’t there. Michael sat through the whole thing, just in case she showed up, but she never did. Work the next afternoon was pointless, too, because Maria also wasn’t there. Spencer came in to work the shift with Michael instead. Frustrated by all the avoidance, he tried to reach her. Phone calls that resulted in voicemails. Texts that were left unanswered. It was like she was deliberately trying to cut herself off from him.
He showed up early to class on Thursday, hoping and praying that today would be different. If he could just see her and say something to her, then maybe they could straighten this whole thing out. It killed him to think that he might have screwed up his relationship with her. Friendship. Whatever the hell it was.
He waited and waited while the other students started to flock into the classroom. Gradually, the seats became more and more filled up, and the clock ticked closer and closer to the start time. He was starting to think she wouldn’t show, or worse, that she’d perhaps dropped the class entirely or switched to the other professor’s section; but then suddenly, there she was, barely peeking her head in the door, as if she weren’t sure whether or not she was going to enter.
“Alright, let’s go ahead and get started,” the professor said.
Come on, Maria, Michael thought, but she didn’t even make eye contact with him as she shut the door and left.
No.
“We’ve got a new decade of music to study,” the professor went on, “and while it may lack the notoriety of the sixties or the infamy of the eighties, there is certainly still a lot to appreciate about the music of the 1970s.”
Screw this, Michael thought, shooting up from his seat. He was in such a hurry to get out of there that he almost left without his backpack.
He rushed out of the room, not bothering to be polite or quiet on his way out, and raced down the hall after Maria, who had a pretty quick pace going herself. “Maria, wait!” he called, catching up with her.
“Let’s not do this, Michael,” she mumbled, still zooming forward, her eyes fixed in front of her. “Not here.”
“I just wanna talk to you.” Was that really so much to ask? “What’re you gonna do, ignore me for the rest of your life?”
She grunted. “I wish.”
He followed her out the door and down the steps, about to get in front of her and just fucking block her progress at this point. “Maria, please!”
She stopped abruptly and whirled around, her hair practically whipping his face as it swung over her shoulder. “I don’t know what you expect me to say,” she ground out.
“I just want you to talk to me.” He didn’t even care if she yelled, because he knew he deserved it. “I miss you.”
That seemed to soften her a bit. Her angry frown morphed into more of a sad pout, and she took a few steps back. “Look, I’m not . . . I’m not mad that you asked her to marry you,” she told him. “She’s a really good person, and you guys are great together.”
Are we? he wondered. Lately, he wasn’t so sure. “Maria . . .”
“But the same exact ring, Michael?” she cut in, her voice shrill with emotion. “You had to propose to her with the same exact ring you gave me?”
He felt helpless, because there was no way to let her know that it had been a mistake without divulging too much. If she knew he’d just
happened to have that ring in his hand when Sarah had walked in, then she’d have even more questions, ones he wasn’t prepared to answer. “I’m sorry,” he apologized, not sure what else he could say.
“You said that was
my ring.”
“You didn’t want it,” he reminded her. “You gave it back to me.”
She threw her hands up in the air, looking exasperated now. “Not so you could give it to her!” Tears sprang to her eyes suddenly, and her voice was quiet and broken when she squeaked out, “How could you, Michael? How could you do this to me?”
Those words . . . they were like a knife to his heart. He’d never meant to cause her any pain, and he hated himself for it.
“And it’s not fair to Sarah, either,” she added. “I’m guessing she doesn’t know. But how do you think she’d feel if she knew I used to wear that ring?”
Common sense told him to stay quiet, but impulse got the best of him, and he snapped, “How do you think I feel knowing you’re back together with the guy who stole it?”
“Oh, so is that what this is about? You’re trying to spite me?”
“No! It’s just . . .” He stopped and took a breath to prevent himself from getting riled up. “Look, you know me; you know how I am. Sometimes I do stupid things.”
“But you’re not a stupid guy,” she pointed out, “so why didn’t you just use a different ring? Her
own ring.”
“I don’t know.” He wished like hell he had. Then they could have avoided this whole issue. He flapped his arms against his sides and decided, “I’ll get a different one now.”
She laughed tearfully at the ridiculousness of that idea. “No you can’t. You gave her
that ring. It’s hers now.”
No, it’s not, he thought. Maybe he could take it from her, just like Max had taken it from Maria. He could use the down-the-drain excuse, get her a new one. And give this one back to Maria. Just so she had it. Because it was still hers.
“It just hurts, that’s all,” Maria told him, gulping back tears. He could see all her emotions
right there, right on the edge, about to pour over. But somehow, she kept them in. “But I’ll get over it,” she said, forcing a smile. But it was the sad kind, and those were always hard to look at. She turned her back to him just as her tears started to fall, and slowly this time, she walked away. And even though he would have only had to have taken one step to keep up with two of hers, he let her go this time, sensing that she needed space.
She didn’t look like she was getting over it, though. She didn’t look like she was over anything.
TBC . . .
-April