To your feedback...
Adian, yup, bitter is the word. But it will get better again.
Emerald_iceus, sorry for keeping you waiting. As for when Liz will find Ava, that will take some more time. Sorry.
A Rose Is True Blue, well, you've read them all now, so no more L/A fics that I can draw you into. Yet...
Nah, not planning on starting a new one. Sigh. I love Alec and Liz too. There just so...sigh-worthy.KnightOwl, no, Alec is not looking too good in Liz's eyes when it comes to trustworthiness. (is that even a word?) And Alec will definitely prove her wrong, eventually. Liz is going to fight all the other things drawing her in again. She'll lose in the end, but she'll put up one hell of a fight. And no, she won't be able to stay away from anyone she's started to form ties towards. They won't let her and her heart won't let her either.
Elf3748, chances are high that the Freak Nation incident will happen in this world. As for when they'll find out the big secret...not sure. It will be a little while till that happens.
WomanofMystery, that sucks having to scrap it all and start over. I've had to throw away pages of what I've written too sometimes, so I'm feeling your pain. Hehe, Liz will bite Alec's butt the next time, promise. I'm glad you liked Liz's thoughts on the whole Alec-thing, despite the direction they took and the conclussion she came to. And duh, of course she can't stay away from Alec. Let's face it, who could?
Zevrillion, glad you liked the part. And when you take into consideration that this is Alec we're tlaking about...Liz's resolve shouldn't last too long, now should it?
bLoOdReDeMpReSs, thanks for the feedback! I'm glad you liked the part.
lyra, thanks for not killing me, I'm very grateful. Honestly I am. Hehe, why does it not surprise me that you're still hung up on the pic Liz gave Logan? Yes, that will be resolved now. This part actually if memory serves me right. Now, do you really think that *anybody* could stay away from Alec? And do you honestly think that Alec would just let Liz stay away from him?
Roswell Slayer, you are such a naughty girl! Just like you to like a naked Alec more than anything else, lol. And of course Alec won't just let her walk away from him, so no worries.
stargrl678, thanks for the feedback! Liz will open up to Alec at some point, but it will take some time till she gets there.
Thanks for all the wonderful feedback! I was a bit scared after posting the part. Glad that you proved me wrong.
Part 21
When I reach Logan’s apartment I don’t bother with knocking, I just barge right in. Polite has been thrown out the window again, where it belongs. Doesn’t get you anywhere anyway. Trust me, I know.
I find him…drum roll please…at his computer. He glances up, a hint of surprise in his eyes. Guess he didn’t expect to see me so soon again. Then he smiles warmly, the surprise vanished.
“Hey Liz.”
“Hey.” My tone is cool, even more so than I had intended, but…whatever.
If he’s fazed by it he doesn’t show it. I guess two years with M will make anyone pretty resistant when it comes to bitchiness.
“Good that you’re here,” he tells me in a suspiciously nonchalant voice. “I’ve been meaning to talk to you.”
His tone, the look in his eyes…I’m not liking this. Not liking this one bit. My guard is up – hell, when is it ever down? – but I don’t show it. I just raise an eyebrow at him.
“It’s about the search for your friend. I came across some rather…surprising information.” His voice is even, calm, giving away nothing.
A greasy knot of bad feelings settles into my stomach. This is not good. I know it’s not good. The combination of the words ‘surprising’ and ‘information’ can never be good. I cross my hands over my chest, hardly even realizing how defensive the gesture is.
“And that would be?” My voice is like ice, but once again, Logan doesn’t seem put off. Hell, he hardly seems to notice.
He swirls around in his chair to face me, bent forwards with his elbows resting on his knees, his hands clasped. For a brief moment I wonder if he chose that position on purpose to seem as least threatening as possible.
“Well, for starters, there was a direct match of the picture you gave me. I found it on the website of West Roswell High, but the writing underneath it stated the girl’s name as Tess Harding. I have the last listed address and phone number of her, but somehow I think you’ve already got those.”
I just stare at him. I can literally feel the color draining from my face and my knees are feeling sort of weak. How could I be so stupid? Of course he would find the picture of Tess on the internet. That’s where I found it for crying out loud! Oh shit. Oh God. I lead him right to the truth…to me…to the aliens. This is bad. This is beyond bad.
“I started doing some research,” he goes on. He’s so calm. How the fuck can he be so calm? I’m having a nervous breakdown here for crying out loud! Can’t he see that? How about some consideration?
“She was reported missing quite about six weeks ago on the same day as Maxwell and Isabel Evans. And you. Seems like you all went to the same high school, same grade even. Guess they’re friends of yours, huh?”
I can barely think straight, not to mention speak and so he goes on. “Elizabeth Parker, only child of Jeffrey and Nancy Parker. Born October 4th, 2003. Exemplary Student. 3.9 GPA, 1476 SAT score. Pretty impressive. I’m sure colleges all over the country will be running your door in once you graduate.”
I just stare at him. He drops a bomb like that on me and then compliments me on my scholastic achievements? What the fuck?!
“W-who else knows about this?” I ask. My voice is trembling – hell, my whole body is – but I don’t even care.
Logan seems taken aback by my question. “Nobody. You asked to keep this between us and I respected that.” He almost sounds insulted.
I narrow my eyes at him. Should I believe him? Trust him? My first reaction is a screamed ‘No!’ reverberating through my brain, loud and clear. But do I even have a choice? He has this information. Nothing I can do about.
Except erasing his memories.
I’m so shocked by that thought that I sink down onto the arm of the couch that’s behind me. I can’t…I could never…it would be wrong. It would be wronger than wrong. It’s a violation of privacy, it’s cruel, inhuman. I can’t take away someone’s memories, mess with someone’s mind. I’m not her.
No. I have to find another solution. One that doesn’t include mindwarping or trusting Logan, because God knows that neither of them is a real option. I get up, blindly making my way to the exit. I have to get out of there, have to think straight. I feel trapped, caged, cornered. I need some air…space. I need to get away. Logan’s next words seem to come out of nowhere, stopping me in my tracks.
“You got shot, didn’t you?”
I freeze, fear and terror clutching at my heart, my throat. I can’t breath. I can’t move. This is it…exposure. I fucked it up.
My body turns around – not me…I’m not sure who is suddenly controlling my body, cause it sure as hell doesn’t feel like it’s me. I do my best at masking the fear that must be evident in my features. I try for a smile, try to keep my voice calm, even, composed, knowing that I failed even before I open my mouth to speak. “What?” I laugh. It comes out more like a choke than a laugh, sounding painfully fake and…scared. Even to my own ears.
“I found some articles and reports concerning a mysterious shooting at the Crashdown Café…the café your parents own, where you used to work as a waitress.” Logan’s voice is still calm and composed. Damn him. Damn him for being so cool when I’ve just about forgotten my own fucking name, I’m so scared.
“There were some witnesses who could have sworn that you got shot. But apparently it was only a spilt ketchup bottle. But if that’s the case…why did the FBI take over the investigation? Why was the bullet never found? Why was there blood on your uniform?”
I must be beyond pale by now. I think I’m gonna faint any moment. I’m hyperventilating but at the same time I feel like I’m on the brink of suffocation.
It’s funny how in the least appropriate moments the most asinine thoughts suddenly float through your mind. Right now I’m asking myself why the damn Pulse couldn’t have been a few years later, erasing all records of the shooting. Now that would have been a nice break.
Colorful dots are starting to dance around before my eyes. Logan must have realized that something isn’t right with me. He gets up, a concerned look on his face. “Liz? Are you okay?”
Suddenly I feel them. I don’t know why I didn’t notice it before cause I’m sure that it didn’t just appear…the green, electric currents, covering my hands and forearms, intensifying with every passing second. It hurts. Damn it, it hurts. Logan seems to have noticed it as well. He’s staring at my hands, despite my attempts to conceal them with my sleeves. He looks…shocked doesn’t even begin to describe it. Maybe we’re both going to faint. Let’s just hope he doesn’t land on top of me…he’s not fat or even very tall but he sure looks heavy. Stupid me. Why am I even thinking about this?
“Oh shit…” I whisper and then darkness takes over.
---------
I hear voices. It sounds like they’re far away, distant, muffled by something thick and soft and heavy. I begin to surface and, hell, I wish I hadn’t. Ugh. Everything hurts. My head, my arms, my whole fucking body actually. Have I said ‘ugh’?
Slowly I open my eyes, squinting at the bright light. Where the fuck is that coming from? Wasn’t it cloudy, rainy? After a few minutes my vision adjusts and I realize that it is cloudy and rainy. The light filtering in through the window is hardly blinding, my vision was just screwed up.
I sit up slowly, careful not to make any sudden movements. Sudden movements tend to hurt like a bitch when your body is in this kind of state. Not that normal movements don’t hurt, but they’re bearable…somewhat. Believe me, lately I’ve had more experience with this kind of thing than I ever wanted.
I hear the voices again, strain to listen. Sounds like Logan and…M. Hmm. If I didn’t know better I’d think he was trying to get rid of her. But that can’t be, can it? Puppy-dog Logan Cale? A minute later I hear the door closing. Then footsteps. Logan appears…alone. Hmm…looks like the puppy is finally growing a pair.
He glances at me, sees that I’m awake. That’s enough to freak me out again. I get up, scrambling to my feet much too quickly of course. Damn it. I sway, darkness threatening to overtake me. Oh God. I’m not gonna faint again, am I? Been there, done that.
Suddenly I realize that Logan prevented me from falling, gently forcing me to sit down again. I’m in no position to fight him and so I obey. Shit. I hate other people being able to do whatever they damn well please with me. It’s like having no free will of your own anymore.
“Hey, careful,” he says softly, and I realize how gentle his grip on me is. “You don’t want to add another bump on the head to your collection.” There’s a smile in his voice. I can’t believe this guy. He’s not seriously joking around, is he?
I don’t reply, just lean back, my eyes closed. I’m breathing deeply, trying to regain control over my body. I need to gather my strength, need to get out of here. My flight instinct is still in place, telling me to run. Fast.
“I’m sorry if I scared you,” Logan goes on and I realize that he’s now sitting beside me. “I didn’t mean to. I guess I should have found a better way to approach the subject. I didn’t really think it through. I didn’t expect you to come over today, not this early in any case. Just…know that your secret is safe with me. I won’t tell anyone. Not Joshua, not Max. Not the police or the press if that’s what you’re concerned about. You can trust me.”
I would snort at that if I had the energy. Instead I just sit there, trying hard not to admit that I’m caught between a rock and a hard one. How could I ever let this happen? How could I be so stupid and trust someone? And what the fuck am I supposed to do now? There’s nothing I can do to change the situation. I can’t turn back time, won’t erase his memories even if that might be the smartest option. But what the fuck do I know about mindwarping? How do you do it so that it’s permanent? I guess he’d be mighty pissed if he discovered that I messed with his head, so I’m not even trying. Not to mention the slight possibility of me blowing up his head, frying his brain or something.
Guess there’s only one thing I can do now. What’s that old saying? Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.
tbc
I can't read fics with Alec in them where he isn't with Liz either. That's just...wrong. And you're writing a L/A fic? I'm thrilled! It's not posted yet, is it? I couldn't have miss that. Can't wait to read it! And I'm not planning on never again writing a L/A fic. I just won't start another one. But once I'm finished with either WTRBTF or DTD, who knows? 
But he will be in the next part. Glad you liked the line about the puppy finally growing a pair...I'm currently chuckling myself, hehe. 
*scratches head* I'll have to work on that... 
Yup, Logan knows. Well, not everything yet, but it will be easy enough for him to figure it out with all the clues he's gathered. Others will find out relatively soon. Won't tell who though. Hehe... 
It's always nice to see that your readers are affected by what you write. And I'm quite proud of this cliffhanger myself, hehe. Anyway, you're pretty much right with everything you said about Liz's reaction. I hope I didn't keep you waiting too long...you're not foaming from the mouth again, are you? 
Really, that's just evil. 
Maybe I should run and hide after all...