Roswell Fanatics

Part 51











Amy went to bed early that night. She skipped dinner, and she told Jim to finish making the lasagna. She wasn’t in the mood to cook. She wasn’t in the mood to do anything but lie in her bed and think.

“You asleep?” Jim asked, crawling into bed beside her later that night.

She shook her head.

He kissed her cheek. “Thinking about Italy?” he guessed.

“Thinking about Michael,” Amy said. “I talked to him earlier.”

“He’s still leaving, isn’t he?” Jim asked.

Amy nodded. “Yeah, he is. But he doesn’t want to.”

“Of course he doesn’t,” Jim said. “Who would want to leave Long Beach for Roswell?”

“He doesn’t care about that,” Amy said. “He cares about Maria. He doesn’t want to leave her.”

“She’ll be better off when he does.”

“That’s what I told him,” Amy said. “I told him that . . . I told him Maria deserves better.” Amy hated that she had said that. She hated herself for speaking those words. “I told that to my son, Jim. My son. Do you know how hard that was for me?”

He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her to him. “You did what needed to be done.”

Amy went to sleep that night, trying to convince herself that she had done and said the right thing, trying to forget the things that Michael had said to her, trying to forget that Michael clearly loved Maria in every way that one person could love another.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria awoke the next morning and immediately reached for her phone. She called Isabel, and Alex picked answered.

“Hey, Maria,” he said. “How are you?”

“How am I?” She was asking herself. “I’m actually kinda confused right now.”

“Anything I can do?” Alex asked, always willing to help in any way that he could.

“Let me talk to Isabel,” Maria suggested.

“Sure,” Alex said. “Hey, by the way, Maria, I’m really happy for you. You and Michael, being together.”

“Thanks,” Maria said. She listened as Alex passed the phone to Isabel. Isabel bitched and complained for a few seconds about it being to early to socialize, but when Alex told her who was calling, Isabel immediately stopped complaining.

“Hey, Maria, what’s up?” Isabel said.

“Apparently not you,” Maria said. “Sorry for waking you. I know it’s early.”

“It’s okay,” Isabel said. “So, how are things going over at the Drama-House?”

“Drama-House?” Maria asked, laughing a little. “Well, I don’t really know. Dramatically, I guess. I’ve just stayed up in my room forever waiting for . . .” She trailed off.

“Waiting for Michael,” Isabel finished.

“Yeah,” Maria said. “I don’t know what’s going on, Isabel. He hasn’t made any effort to talk to me or even see me.”

Isabel sighed. “You wanna hear my theory?”

“Yes,” Maria said, nodding eagerly.

“He’s scared.”

Maria shook her head. “I don’t think so. Michael doesn’t get scared.”

“Sure, he does,” Isabel said. “I think he’s scared that your parents are gonna freak out if they see you two around each other, so he’s keeping his distance until they calm down about it.”

“What if they never calm down about it, though?” Maria suggested. “He can’t just avoid me forever.”

“You’re right,” Isabel said. “He can’t. I’ve seen the way he looks at you, Maria. He’ll cave in eventually.”

“The way he looks at me?” Maria was well aware of the way Michael looked at her, but she wanted to see what someone else thought of it.

“Yeah,” Isabel said, “like you’re his whole universe.”

Maria found herself smiling. “Really?”

“Really,” Isabel said. “So, look, I don’t think you have anything to worry about. Like I said, Michael can’t stay away from you for long. Give him a few more days, and he’ll be crawling back into your bed at night.”

Maria liked that idea. “Okay,” she said. “A few more days. I can do that.”

When Maria got off the phone with Isabel, she decided to go down for breakfast. She stopped at Michael’s door on the way and tried the knob again. It was still locked. Even though she and Isabel had concluded that he was just scared of her parents’ reactions, Maria still couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something else going on, something bigger.

“Please let me in, Michael,” she whispered. “Please.”

She waited, but the door never opened.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I wanna let you in, Maria. I wanna let you in so bad.

Later that afternoon, Jim knocked on Michael’s bedroom door. “It’s me,” he said unenthusiastically.

“Go away,” Michael told him.

“I brought you lunch,” Jim said. “Amy wants you to eat. Open the door.”

“I said go away.”

“And I said open the door.”

Jim was a strange man like that. Michael wasn’t sure what it was about him, but he had a way of making people do what he wanted them to do. Michael had always considered himself to be fairly strong-willed and obstinate, but even he found himself getting off the bed and crossing the room over to the door, unlocking it and opening it for Jim to step inside.

“Here,” Jim said, handing him a sandwich. Michael took it and set it down on the table beside his bed. He wasn’t hungry.

“Are you ready to go?” Jim asked, leaning against the wall as Michael made himself comfortable on the bed.

“No,” Michael answered honestly.

“I heard you talked to Amy last night.”

Michael had been trying to forget about that. A desperate attempt to stay in the form of a rush of honesty had escaped him last night. He had been hoping that Amy would see how he felt about Maria, that she would take sympathy on him and invite him to stay longer, but she had been cold and shut down, just the way Jim wanted her to be.

“Amy was right,” Jim said. “You and Maria aren’t meant to be together. She deserves better than you.”

“Yeah, I know,” Michael said. “I deserve a drunken father and a trailer park.”

Jim didn’t object. “Are you going to live with your father, Michael?”

That was something Michael hadn’t even thought about. “Do you care?” he retaliated.

“No,” Jim answered immediately. “I’m just trying to make conversation.”

“Don’t,” Michael told him. “I’m not in the mood to converse. I’m feeling pretty fucked up right now, so I just wanna be alone.”

“Right,” Jim said, starting for the door. He stopped in the doorway and turned back to Michael. “Have you told her yet?” he asked Michael.

He shook his head.

“You need to.”

“I can’t.”

“Then I’ll tell her.”

“No,” Michael almost shouted, rising from the bed. “Don’t tell her. I don’t want her to know.” He found himself pleading now. “Please. Don’t.”

Jim nodded his silent agreement and quietly exited the room.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Later that afternoon, Maria emerged from her room again to go talk with her mother. The door to Michael’s room was still locked, and she was beginning to get worried.

“Hey, I need to talk to you,” Maria announced. Amy was downstairs doing laundry.

“Well, you’re just going to have wait a minute,” Amy said, loading a huge pile of clothes into the washer. “I’m busy.”

“Just forget about the laundry,” Maria told her, taking a towel from her hands. “I really need to ask you about something.”

Amy sighed. “What?”

“Michael.”

“Oh big surprise.”

“How is he?” Maria asked. “Just tell me how he is.”

Amy shrugged. “I don’t know, Maria. I really don’t.” She tried to take the towel back from Maria, but Maria held it behind her and out of her mother’s reach.

“Have you talked to him at all?” Maria asked.

Amy shook her head. “No. I haven’t. I haven’t talked to him at all, Maria, now would you give me back that towel.”

Maria didn’t give her back the towel. “Well he’s avoiding me,” she said. “He locked himself up in his room, and he hasn’t even come out to look at me.”

“Well, that’s fine with me,” Amy said, “because I’m not so sure I want him looking at you, Maria.”

“Just stop,” Maria told her. “Just stop, okay? Stop saying things like that. Listen, I’m worried, okay? I am worried about Michael. I’m worried about my boyfriend, and whether you wanna face it or not, he is my boyfriend, so help me out here.”

Amy sighed, almost wincing when Maria said boyfriend. “Honey,” she said, placing one of her hands on Maria’s shoulder, “I think that right now, Michael is most probably up in his bedroom reexamining his relationship with you.”

“What?” Maria shrieked, jerking away from her mother’s touch. “No, he’s not doing that!”

Amy shrugged. “It’s what makes the most sense, honey.”

Maria shook her head. “No, it doesn’t. What makes the most sense is that he’s scared of what you and Dad are gonna think and say and do if he comes anywhere near me. That’s what makes the most sense.” Maria left Amy in the laundry room, not wanting to think about the other possibility. “Just a few more days,” she told herself, hurrying up the stairs to her bedroom, the only safe haven. “Just a few more days and everything will be back to normal.”











TBC...

Part 52








Night fell and shadows overtook the room as Michael Guerin laid on his bed and missed another dinner, still unable to eat with the situation that faced him that next morning. Leaving. Running away. Abandoning.

Abandoning the only person who had ever given him life in order to give her life back to her.

He lay on his bed and closed his eyes, not really dreaming, but remembering. Remembering a conversation he and Maria had a while ago when Tess and Josh had come to Long Beach in order to persuade him to go back to Roswell. They had been up in her bedroom, in her bed.

“It took me forever to realize how I feel about you, and I was just so scared that I was gonna lose you right after I finally found you.”

“I can’t believe you thought I was gonna leave you. It wasn’t even an option for me, Maria.”

“You never even thought about it?”

“No.”

“Good, ‘cause I don’t know what I would do if you left me. Everyone else already has.”

“I’m never gonna leave you, Maria. It’s just not gonna happen.”

He was a liar. He was a stupid, fucked-up liar. Why the hell had he told her that? Why had he promised her that? It made leaving even harder now.

He wasn’t sure what he would miss most about her. He wasn’t sure if he would miss her hands or her lips more. He knew he would miss her eyes a lot. He loved looking into those eyes. He had a feeling that what he would miss the most, though, was her voice. He would miss talking to her, listening to her. He would miss her laugh. He would miss that silly snorting noise she made when she got laughing too hard. Most of all, he would miss the sound of his name on her lips, the way she made it sound like a good name that belonged to a good guy.

Michael glanced at the clock. It was 10:00 p.m. Within a few hours, he would pack his things up in the Ford Taurus that seemed to be his now and drive off to LAX to get on a plane to Santa Fe. He would leave. He would run away. He would abandon.

It would be painful.

He would endure the pain for her.

But he would also cause her pain. The knowledge was unbearable.

He wasn’t sure what it was, but something told Michael to open his door. He got up off the bed and reached for the doorknob, unlocking it and swinging the door open. He stepped out into the hallway, and he froze in place when he saw her, Maria, stepping out into the hallway from her room, too. They stood in place and gazed at each other for several long seconds, and Michael knew he was gazing at perfection, gazing at the only perfection that would ever touch him in this lifetime or any other.

“Hey,” she said timidly when her voice started working again. “I haven’t seen you in a couple of days.”

He noticed her eyes were shimmering, shimmering with tears. She looked so beautiful, and it was painful to see her, knowing that he would never see that beauty again.

He opened his mouth to try to speak, to try to explain, but he couldn’t. His breath caught, and words were not possible. He just stood there like and idiot, looking at her, wanting her, wishing he could have her forever.

She took a few steps forward and neared him, reaching up to touch his cheek. The simplest touch sent shock waves through Michael’s body, and he had to turn to look away.

She pulled her hand away and studied him. “What’s wrong?” she asked him. Leave it to her to know that there was something wrong. Leave it to her to know everything about him.

He continued to look at the ground, avoiding looking at her as long as he could.

“Michael?”

And there it was. His name. His name in her voice, escaping her lips. No longer able to keep from looking at her, he stopped looking at the ground and returned to looking into her shimmering eyes. He saw something new there, now, something that had replaced her tears.

Concern. She was worried about him.

He wanted to tell her that he was okay, even though he really wasn’t, just so that she wouldn’t worry about him, but he still couldn’t find the words, so he did the only thing that he could do. He said her name in return.

“Maria.” It felt good to say her name. It always did. It had been too long since he had last said it.

A small smile found a way to her face, and she leaned in, pressing her lips to his gently. He didn’t allow himself to kiss her back. He couldn’t go that far. Instead, he pulled away, looking at the floor again.

“I’m sorry,” she apologized. “I forgot. My parents. We can . . .” She trailed off and reached back behind her, placing her hand on her doorknob. “We can go in here.”

They could. Michael knew he wanted to. He knew he shouldn’t.

She slowly opened her door, allowing him a glimpse inside. Her room always looked so warm and inviting, but it looked different without his things strewn around the place, without his Metallica t-shirts and CDs and shoes.

“I . . .” He started, trying to explain why he could not go into her room, why it was too much at that point, but he found himself giving in. “Okay.”

She stepped into the room and held open the door for him, allowing him inside. She closed it after they were both inside and waited for him to say something.

“You changed stuff,” he commented, noticing that she had rearranged her furniture.

“Yeah,” she said, nodding. “I had some free time today, so I moved things around a little. Do you like it?”

He nodded. He would like Maria’s room no matter what.

They stood in silence for a long time. Michael didn’t know what to say. He wanted Maria to say something. He wanted to hear her voice some more.

“Are you okay?” she asked him finally. “You’re usually not this quiet.”

“I know,” he said, leaving it at that. He stuffed his hands in his pockets, feeling the sudden need to reach out and touch her, and he started looking at the floor again.

Maria stepped in front of him. “Did my dad say something to you?” she asked him. “You don’t have to worry about what he thinks.”

Michael didn’t say anything.

“Look at me,” she told him. “Michael, look at me.”

He did, and he wished she hadn’t. God, she was too beautiful. He couldn’t stay in that room much longer with her.

“What’s going on?” she asked him. “Why are you like this?”

“Like what?” he asked her, pretending he didn’t know.

She shrugged. “I don’t know. You’re not, like . . . you’re not . . . reexamining our relationship, are you?”

“What?”

She blushed. “I talked to my mom and she says that’s what she thinks you’re doing.”

“Your mom?” Michael asked. Her mother knew exactly what he was doing.

She nodded. “Yeah. It sounds stupid, I know, and I probably shouldn’t even be wondering about it, but I’m kinda getting freaked out now because you’re acting so strange.”

“Sorry,” he apologized.

“You don’t need to apologize,” she told him. “Just tell me what’s going on.”

He couldn’t do that. He couldn’t hurt her that much.

“I’m just kinda confused,” he told her. “Not about you. Never about you.”

She smiled and breathed a sigh of relief. “Okay,” she said. “Good. Um . . . but what are you confused about, Michael, and why have you been locking me out of your room, ‘cause I’m kinda confused by that.”

“I just . . .” So beautiful. “It’s nothing,” he said.

She stared up into his eyes for a long time, and then she placed her hands on his arms. “I missed you,” she told him, leaning in to kiss him again. He pulled away before her lips could brush his. He couldn’t handle this anymore. He had to get out of there before he could never leave. He started for the door.

“Michael, don’t go,” she begged. “Please.”

He stopped with his hand on the doorknob.

“Michael, why are you doing this?” she asked him. “What did I do?”

“Nothing,” he told her. “You didn’t do anything, Maria.” He opened the door, prepared to leave.

“Michael, wait!”

Her voice stopped him from stepping through the door and out into the hallway.

“Don’t leave me.”

He felt a wave of emotion crash over him, and he struggled to stay strong in front of her. He slowly turned and looked at her. Her eyes were a mix of tears and concern now, and her appearance was utterly breathtaking. Perfection. Always perfection.

“Just tell me what’s happening,” she told him. “Tell me, Michael.”

He opened his mouth, but he couldn’t tell her. Words once again failed him, so he did what he did best. He abandoned verbal and embraced physical. He took two long strides toward her and cupped her face in his hands, crushing his lips to hers. He let himself enjoy the kiss, knowing that it would be the last one.

But it wasn’t the last one. He pulled away and started for the door again, muttering to both her and himself, “I should go,”, but she pulled him back. She held onto his shoulders and leaned in, kissing him again, allowing him to lose himself in her. “Don’t go,” she whispered, pressing her forehead against his.

He didn’t want to, and at that point, he didn’t think he could. He made his way over to the door and closed it, locking it into place. He spun around to face her again, all worries and doubts leaving his mind for the moment.

She neared him and placed her hands on his chest, trailing her fingers down to the bottom of his shirt. She slowly eased it up his body, and when he lifted his arms in the air, she lifted it above his head. She dropped it to the floor and the bent forward, pressing her lips to his chest, running her hands across his ribs, circling his nipple with her tongue. He found his hands wrapping around her, holding her closer to him. She kissed her way up to his collarbone and up his neck to nibble on his ear. “Put your hands on me, Michael,” she whispered.

He let one hand wrap around her waist and travel up the back of her shirt to caress the smooth skin of her back. He let the other tangle in her hair.

“I need you, Michael,” she told him, kissing his lips again. “I want you.”

The desire running crazily inside of him started to take control as all thoughts of taking things slow vanished from his mind. He pulled her shirt over her head and threw it to the ground on top of his, immediately fumbling with the bra clasp that kept her beautiful breasts from his view. He cursed when he couldn’t get the clasp undone.

“Shh,” she told him, pressing her index finger to his lips. “I can help.” She reached behind with one hand and undid the clasp, letting the bra fall from her body. His mouth found her breasts, and wasting no time, he began to suck on her vigorously, eliciting a loud moan from her. As he devoured her with his mouth, his hands worked dangerously fast at removing her jeans. His shaking fingers were also unable to undo that button, and he finally just gave up and ripped the jeans where they were supposed to be unbuttoned. He pushed them down her long legs in a hurry, along with her panties. He returned to kissing her lips then, wrapping his arms around her and pressing her naked body into his partially clothed one.

“Take your pants off,” she gasped as his hands gripped down hard on her ass.

With one arm still around her and the other unfastening his belt, he backed them up against a wall and ravaged her neck. He groaned when he felt her assisting him in removing his jeans and her hand brushed his hardened cock. The simplest touch made him feel like he was exploding.

She was pressing her lower body up into his before his pants and boxers were all the way down. “Oh god, I want you,” she cried.

He stepped out of the remainder of his clothes and picked Maria up in his arms, carrying her over to her bed. He fell down with her on top of him, and they resumed their mating frenzy. His hands explored her body while her tongue explored his mouth.

“Need you . . .” Maria moaned, brushing her entrance against his erection, “. . . inside.”

Michael’s body stilled as she sat straddling his hips, positioning her entrance at the head of his cock. He grabbed her hips and stopped her from sinking down on top of him. “No,” he said, shaking his head. “No, I can’t.” He couldn’t let himself go that far. “I can’t.”

“Michael . . .” She gazed at him. Her eyes were dark and filled with lust, with desire, with passion. “Inside.”

Despite what he knew he should and should not do, Michael found himself giving in and groaning in ecstasy as she sank down on top of him, putting his body inside of hers. She cried his name as he began to thrust his hips up to meet hers and dug her nails into his shoulders. Michael let his eyes wash over her as she moved on top of him, over her eyes, her lips, her breasts, her stomach, and finally, lower, to the place where they were joined. It was an erotic sight, seeing himself inside of her, seeing her body joined with his, and it made him move faster, turning them over so that she was on the bottom and he was on the top. He hooked one arm under her leg where her knee bent, holding it up higher for a wider access and pounded into her.

“Michael,” she cried, thrashing around wildy and clutching at the sheets as her climax approached. “Oh god!”

With each thrust, he entered her fully and then exited, leaving only the tip of his throbbing cock inside of her, repeating the motion over and over so that each time was a full penetration. Her orgasm rocked her first, and his followed soon after. He felt himself tightening as he released himself inside of her, and after his orgasm reached an end, he collapsed on top of her.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Downstairs, there was much less activity. Jim sat on the couch with Amy, watching TV. Amy seemed distracted. “What is it?” he asked his wife.

“What’s going on up there?” Amy asked.

Jim shrugged. Nothing, as far as he could tell. “I don’t think anything’s going on,” he said.

Amy smiled. “You’re right. I’m just being silly.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Later that night, they lay breathing heavily under the sheets. He was on top of her, supporting all of his weight with his arms and looking into her eyes. He had been looking into her eyes for some time now, and he looked as if he wanted to say something to her, but he never spoke.

She reached up and brushed his hair off of his forehead, and ran her hands down his sweat-soaked arms, breathing in the scent of their sex in the air, the scent of them.

“Go to sleep,” she told him, leaning in and pressing her lips against his forehead. She brought his head down to rest against her breasts, and he relaxed, breathing heavily against her skin.

Even though she was exhausted, (Sex on the bed, the floor, against the wall, and then on the bed again could do that to a person) she held him until she was sure he was asleep. She burrowed her hands in his hair and ran her fingers up and down his back, admiring the marks her nails had left on him. She fell asleep that night feeling for the first time in what seemed like a long time that everything was going to be alright.










TBC...

Part 53









Amy was up early that next morning putting laundry away. She wiped her tired eyes as she put some of her clothes away in drawers. She hadn’t slept much last night. Michael was leaving today, and that knowledge had kept her awake, thinking. She felt bad for him, to a degree. He obviously didn’t want to leave, and he didn’t seem to have any general sort of a plan as to where he was going to live, who he was going to live with, how he was going to live. Amy was worried about him. Most of all, she was worried at how he was going to separate himself from Maria.

Amy had watched them get close, always thinking they were just friends. She thought back to all of the times that they hung around together, staying up late and watching Will and Grace marathons. She thought about all the times they looked into each other’s eyes and communicated without words, nonverbal. She thought of all the times she walked into a room and found them hanging out in their own created universe.

They really did make each other happy.

Amy pushed these thoughts away, knowing that they were not going to be together, and she headed upstairs to give Michael the last of his shirts that she had washed. She knocked on the door to his room, assuming that he would be awake, but no one answered. “It’s me, Michael,” Amy announced. “I’ve got some shirts here. Your favorite one. You probably don’t want to leave without that.” She waited, expecting him to open up the door at any minute, but he didn’t. She knocked again. “Michael?” Still nothing. Finally, Amy tried just walking in. To her surprise, the door was unlocked. Michael had been locking out the entire world for the past few days. She stepped inside, but she didn’t see him. He wasn’t in his bed. He wasn’t packing any last minute items. The light was off in the bathroom, so he wasn’t in there.

“Michael?” Amy asked again, knowing that no one was going to answer her. Judging by what she had believed she heard upstairs last night, she knew where Michael was.

Amy left Michael’s room and tried the door to Maria’s. This was the door that was locked.

Amy knew. Michael was in there. He was with Maria. He was in her bed, probably in her arms. They had probably just slept together. And for some reason, this did not infuriate her the way she had imagined it would.

Amy left them alone, going back downstairs. Jim was sitting in the kitchen, reading the paper. “Is Michael up yet?” he asked.

“Uh, yeah,” Amy said, not sure if he was or not. “I think he’s getting ready.”

Jim smiled. “This is a glorious day for any father with a teenaged daughter out there.”

“Why’s that?” Amy asked.

“Because,” he said, “the unaccepted boyfriend leaves today. Glorious day.”

Amy tried to hide how uncomfortable she was with that subject. “Sure is.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Too soon. I don’t wanna go.

Michael awoke when the bright morning sun fell through the window. The first thing he remembered was that he wasn’t alone this morning. Maria was laying beside him now, holding him to her. She was still sleeping, and a small smile had formed on her face. She looked so peaceful, so happy.

Michael slowly maneuvered himself out of Maria’s warm embrace. He got up and closed the curtains to keep out the light of the sun so that she would not wake up, and then he went to sit by the side of the bed, not allowing himself to get back in for fear that he would never get out. He sat for at least a half an hour, watching her, trying to remember everything there was to remember about her. He was taking a picture of her with him, but somehow, the picture wasn’t close enough to the real thing.

She was right for him. She was the right one. She was the only one. As he had told Amy, every other girl was just a trash can. Nothing special. Maria was special, and he wasn’t ever going to fall for anyone again, not while he still held the memory of her. Anyone else would be a distant second best.

Maria . . . she was everything. His entire world. He wished he had the strength to tell her that. He wished he had told her so many things. Most of all, he wished he had told her loved her. She deserved to know, but it was too late now. It was too late to tell. Maybe she just knew, but maybe she didn’t.

Eventually, Michael forced himself to get up and get dressed. He had to get out of that room. He only had a little over an hour left before he needed to get on the way to the airport. He thought about writing her a letter or something, but that wasn’t his style anyway, and he didn’t know what to say. ‘I know I told you I was never leaving, but now I’ve left.’ Yeah, that was great.

Michael didn’t write a letter. He just glanced around the familiar room and then down at the familiar girl, and he kissed her on the forehead. He made his way over to the door and paused with his hand on the doorknob, taking one last glance back, and then one more, never able to stop looking at her. She said his name in her sleep, and he felt his lungs tighten, feeling like he couldn’t breathe. She was dreaming about him, just as he always dreamt about her.

It felt like it took the strength of a thousand men for Michael to glance at her one last time and then make his way out the door, closing it in place behind him. He went into his room to shower and change during his last hour in the DeLuca household.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria awoke feeling cold. She didn’t know why she would be cold. She never was cold when Michael was around.

She opened her eyes, rubbing the sleep from them, and reached for Michael on his side of the bed. She didn’t feel him. She reached again. Still nothing. She looked around. Michael wasn’t in the bed. In fact, Michael didn’t even appear to be in the room.

That’s strange, she thought. He always holds me and we talk after . . .

“Michael?” she asked, sitting up and holding the sheets to her naked body. She halfway expected him to answer, but he didn’t. “Michael?” She glanced at the clock, wondering if Michael had left the room because it was getting late, but it was still early. 7:30 in the morning. “Okay,” she said, glancing around some more. She was hoping maybe he would jump out from under the bed or something and surprise her, but he didn’t. She didn’t like that she didn’t know where he was. She wanted him around.

Resigning to the fact that he was somewhere else, Maria got up and went into the bathroom, stepping into the shower. She washed the sweat from her body, wishing that Michael was with her. He was always so romantic in the water.

Maria wrapped a towel around herself and blow-dried her hair. Then she stepped out of the bathroom and started rummaging around in her closet for something to wear. She wanted to wear something nice, because she wasn’t planning on just sitting around the house that day. She planned on going out and having fun in Long Beach for one last day before the vacation to Hawaii.

Maria found herself getting excited as she started to think about Hawaii. After months of planning, it was time to go. She couldn’t wait.

She dressed in a tiny pink shirt and a pair of comfortable jeans and admired her appearance in the mirror. Then she started dancing around the room singing, using her hairbrush as a pretend microphone.

“Love me, love me! Say that you love me!”

She knew she was being a dork, but when she was in a good mood, she sang and danced and did stupid things.

“Love me, love me! Say that you love me!”

Maria turned on some rap music and began dancing around, climbing on top of her bed to pretend that she was up on stage performing as a background dancer for Usher. She started laughing at herself then, wondering why she was in such a great mood. She hadn’t been in a great mood for awhile it seemed.

When she got tired, Maria turned off the music and decided to go check out what Michael was doing. She knocked on his door. “Michael?”

Nothing.

Maria tried the door, happy to see that it was unlocked now. It was nice to know that he wasn’t going to be keeping her out anymore. Maria stepped into the room noticing immediately how empty it looked. It wasn’t like Michael had a ton of personal crap to lay around in his room, and most of his stuff usually laid in her room anyway, but it didn’t look like he had anything anywhere. He must have taken my suggestion to actually store things in the closet, Maria thought. Michael’s stuff was constantly scattered across the floor. Either that or he’s packed a lot for Hawaii.

“Michael?” Maria said, looking around the room. He wasn’t in there. She had a feeling that he was probably already downstairs eating breakfast or something.

“Are you in the bathroom?” she asked, walking towards his private bathroom. “Are you naked? ‘Cause that could be interesting!” She swung open the door to the bathroom, but Michael wasn’t there, either. In fact, nothing was. No towel, no deodorant, no hair gel, no toothpaste, no razor. Weird, Maria thought, shrugging.

She closed the door to the bathroom and headed back out through the room, deciding that she would make an appearance at breakfast today, since Michael had to be down there. She was thinking that they could play Footsie under the table just to piss her father off.

Maria was almost out the door when something caught her eye. The room was virtually empty, yes, but there was one thing that remained. There was some sort of a slip of paper laying on the table beside the bed. Curiosity got the best of Maria, and she went over to see what it was. She picked it up and glanced it over, and she was filled with a sense of undeniable confusion.

What was this?

Michael A. Guerin . . . Santa Fe, New Mexico . . . Southwest Airlines . . .

A plane ticket? Why would Michael have a plane ticket? Why was he going to Santa Fe?

Reality hit Maria like a bullet. Michael was leaving. Michael was leaving her.

She didn’t cry. She was too shocked. She glanced out the window and saw that Michael was loading some bags in the trunk of the Ford Taurus. She shook her head in disbelief, not able to believe what she now knew to be true.









TBC...

Part 54 (The song lyrics in this part are from the song "Only One" by the group Yellowcard.)







Michael took inventory. He had all of his things. He had a little money, he had his identification, he had the car keys, and he had . . . Where the hell was his ticket?

“You know,” a voice said. Michael recognized that voice. It was the voice of the person that he was going to miss the most. Maria. He looked up to see her walking out of the house with his plane ticket in her hand. “If you’re planning on flying to Santa Fe, you might want your plane ticket.”

Michael sighed. Leaving her already was worse than dying a thousand deaths. This confrontation was only going to make it worse, more difficult.

“Just a thought,” she said, waving the ticket around in front of him.

“I didn’t want you to know,” he said, taking the ticket from her and stuffing it into his back pocket.

“Obviously.”

He could see it in her eyes. She was hurt, yes, but she had put that on the back burner for now. As she was looking at him, she was angered, enraged.

“I just thought it would be easier if I--”

“You know, Michael,” she interrupted, cutting him off, “I gotta say, this is a surprise. You leaving like this. So tell me, what exactly was last night, huh? A bon voyage fuck?”

“No!” he said a little too loudly. How could she possibly think that?

“‘Cause we slept together, Michael . . . again, and I woke up thinking that we were gonna talk or . . . or, I don’t know, that we were just gonna lay there or something, but you weren’t even in the room. So forgive me if it seems like you thought last night was pretty worthless.”

“Worthless?” He couldn’t believe she was saying that. “I never thought that, Maria! Last night was one of the best nights of my life!”

“Yeah, and I bet this is one of the best days or your life, isn’t it? You finally get to get away from me.”

“Maria, you know that’s not true. Why are you being like this?”

She threw her hands up in the air, and for the first time, he saw tears in her eyes. “I’m being like this because I don’t know how else to be! All I know right now is that you’re leaving, and I’m not really liking that, ‘cause you told me you would never leave, Michael! You told me that so many times! And I don’t know how to feel or what to say or what to do, because the only thing I can grasp right now is that my boyfriend or stepbrother or whoever the hell you are is going away and leaving me behind!”

Michael stood there in silence. He felt awful for doing this. He hated himself. He hated that he wasn’t the Prince Charming she deserved. If he had been, he wouldn’t have to leave.

A single tear fell down her cheek. “Were you even gonna say good-bye?” she asked him. “Really? Were you?”

He shook his head slowly.

“Great,” she said sarcastically. “Great, Michael. It’s great to know I’m that unimportant.”

“It’s not like that,” he told her. “I couldn’t,” he said. “I didn’t know how to without hurting you.”

“Well, newsflash,” she said, “you’re hurting me right now! God, Michael . . .” A few more tears followed her first. Michael wanted to reach out and wipe them away. “How could you?” she asked him, her voice cracking. “God, how could you do this to me? I thought you . . .” She trailed off and shook her head.

“What?”

She let out a shaky sigh. “I thought you cared about me.”

“I do,” he said. “I do, Maria. I care about you ten times more than I care about myself.”

“I’m sure that’s true,” she said sarcastically, not believing him.

“How can I show you?” he asked her. “How can I prove that I care about you, Maria?”

“You can stay,” she told him simply. “You can unpack everything and come back in the house and stay.”

“I can’t,” he told her.

“Why not?” she asked. “Does this have something to do with my dad?”

“Sort of,” he explained. “He wants me out of the house. Out of Long Beach.”

“He can’t make you leave Long Beach.”

“I know.”

Maria took a few steps back from him. He didn’t like the anger he saw in her eyes. “So you’re choosing to go back to New Mexico? You’re choosing to go far away from me?”

“I don’t want to,” he said, “but I have to.”

“Why?”

He felt tears stinging his own eyes. “I’m not good enough for you.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“What?” Maria didn’t understand anything that was happening. She felt like she was going to collapse. She could barely function, let alone process what was happening. “What do you mean you’re not good enough for me? I never said that!”

“I know you didn’t,” he said, “but everyone else did.”

“Screw everyone else!” Maria insisted. “I don’t give a damn about any of them and neither should you!”

“It’s not just them,” Michael said. “It’s me, too. I believe it. I know it’s true. You deserve better. You deserve perfect. I don’t.”

Maria shook her head. “No . . . no, I . . . I don’t understand how you could possibly believe that, Michael, and I don’t believe it, either.”

“What do you believe?”

“I believe that this is just a little too convenient. You’re leaving right after people find out about us. You’re looking for an excuse to leave. You want out. You don’t wanna be with me. You probably don’t even like me.”

“Dammit, Maria, how can you say that?” he spat, pounding his fist down hard on the back of the car. “Why the hell would I spend almost the past year of my life being around you if I don’t even like you?”

“Sex, probably,” she said.

“What?”

“God, Michael, my first time was . . .”

“I know.”

“I gave you everything!” She was completely crying now. “I gave you my heart, my body and soul! And does that mean anything?”

“It means everything!”

“God, Michael!” she shouted, wiping away some of her tears. She just had to shout for a minute. She was so angry with him. “God! You know . . . I-I really . . . I don’t care why you’re leaving, I just . . . I can’t get past the fact that you’re actually going, that you’re actually going away, and you don’t have to. I know you think that you have to, but you don’t. You don’t have to go. You can stay here, and you’re not. You’re choosing to go.”

“I’m just going so I can make your life better.”

“How is that gonna make my life better?” she asked him in disbelief. “Michael, have you even thought about this? How is it gonna help me if I don’t have anyone to run to when I cry? How is it gonna help me when I don’t have anyone that makes me laugh, anyone that makes me smile?”

He was silent.

“How is your leaving possibly gonna help me?” she repeated. “How, Michael?”

His voice was quiet when he spoke. “You’ll find somebody better.”

She couldn’t believe it. She couldn’t believe that he could even bare to think about her being with someone else, let alone vocalize it. “No,” she said, shaking her head furiously. “No, I won’t. I may find someone with more money or a superstar job or a gigantic house, but I’m not gonna find anybody better. I’m not gonna find anybody better for me. I’m not gonna find someone who can sit there and watch 5 hours of Will and Grace with me.”

He smiled a little.

“I’m not gonna find someone who buys me a $500 dollar necklace when he’s barely got enough money as it is. I’m not gonna find someone who takes me to the prom even though he doesn’t really believe in them.” She hung her head and let the tears fall. “I’m not gonna find someone who makes me feel the things you do.”

They stood in silence for a short while. Michael reached out to tuck a stray strand of hair behind her ear, but she backed away from him. “Maria . . .”

“Stop saying my name like that,” she told him.

“Like what?”

She could barely get the words out. “Stop saying my name like we’re friends.”

“We are friends,” he told her. “We’re so much more, Maria.”

“We were,” she said, “or at least I thought so, but apparently not, because you can just leave me.”

“Because I have to.”

“That’s a load of crap, Michael. It’s because you want to.”

“That’s the farthest thing from the truth!”

Maria let out a shaky breath, still crying. “I’m so mad at you right now,” she told him honestly, “and I know we shouldn’t end things on bad terms and all, but there’s no way we’re getting back on good terms right now.”

“Maria . . .”

“I told you to stop . . .” She ran her hands through her hair, stressed. “God, just stop, Michael. Just stop everything and just go. It’s what you wanna do.”

“How many times do I have to tell you, it’s not! It’s the last thing I wanna do.”

“Bullshit, Michael,” she said. “You wanna go back to Roswell. You wanna go back to Roswell so you can live in that infested trailer!” She knew she was being cruel. At this point, she didn’t care. “You wanna go back so you can live with your drunken father! You wanna go get high with your friend Josh and vandalize some more schools! You wanna go back to Roswell so you can be with your little whore Tess!”

Michael didn’t say anything. He just stood leaning against the car with his hands in his pockets. “I guess I deserved that,” he said.

She nodded, wiping the tears from her cheeks.

He took a step forward and placed what he must have thought was a comforting hand on her arm.

“Don’t touch me!” she shouted in warning. She jerked away from him and wrapped her arms around herself, wanting suddenly to be as far away from him as possible.

He stood there, staring at her, and he must have sensed that there was only one thing he could have said in that moment, because he said it, loud and clear.

“I love you.”

She looked up into his eyes, unable to believe that he had just said that. Michael didn’t say that to anyone, and if he did, he didn’t mean it.

He meant this.

She watched as he went around to the driver’s side of the car and opened the door. Her mouth dropped open, wanting to speak before he got in the car, wanting so desperately to say anything, something, to tell him that she loved him, too, but she couldn’t get any words out. She didn’t know if it was the anger she had been feeling towards him or the sadness that he was leaving that kept her from saying it. Maybe it was just the shock that somebody loved her, was in love with her, and it was for real.

He looked at her for a long time, and he put on a weak smile, but she could see the tears on his face, too. He was trying to disguise it, but it was difficult for him to do this. More than difficult.

He gave her a slight nod and then got in the car, closing the door. Maria took a few steps, but she couldn’t get anywhere fast. She felt like she couldn’t move.

Michael started the car and took off down the road. He left. He really left. He stopped at the corner, even though there was no stop sign, almost as if he was hesitating, thinking it over, but then he continued on his way.

“Wait.” Maria’s voice came out in a whisper at first as she watched him go, but it eventually got louder. “Wait. Wait, Michael! Wait!” She tried to run after him, but that was hopeless. She watched the Ford Taurus disappear from her sight, and she fell to her knees on the grass. At first, she didn’t cry, but then, as the reality of what had just happened set in over her, Maria began to sob. One after another, the tears fell. She thought they would never stop.

Here I go
Scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one

She never moved from that spot for at least a half an hour. She knew she was pathetic, sitting and crying, but at that time, she was capable of nothing else. Then, when her tears finally subsided, a realization occurred to Maria: Michael was her Prince Charming, the once-in-a-lifetime guy that she would never be able to replace, and though he was leaving, he wasn’t gone yet.

I let go
There’s just no one that gets me like you do
You are my only, my only one . . .

She had wasted a half an hour crying. She couldn’t afford to waste anymore.

Maria glanced up at the Hummer sitting in the driveway and then down the long, now empty road which Michael had driven. She knew what she needed to do.

Here I go
Scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one

I let go
There’s just no one . . . no one like you
You are my only, MY ONLY ONE . . .










TBC...





ONLY TWO PARTS LEFT!

Part 55










Maria raced through the hallway to her parents bedroom. She hurried inside and slammed the door behind her. She searched around for the keys to the Hummer, climbing over the many suitcases that were packed and waiting for Italy. She rifled through her mother’s purse, tossing credit cards, check books, loose change, and lipstick on the floor, but she found no keys. She was about to scream out of pure frustration when she spied the keys sitting atop the vanity in clear, plain sight, right in front of her eyes. She bolted up and grabbed the keys, upset with herself for not noticing them sooner. She had just wasted more time, and she couldn’t afford to waste any more time. Each second she wasted was a second that Michael got closer to being gone.

Maria ran back down the hallway, passing through the kitchen and by her parents unnoticed. She took one last glance at them, resenting them with a fiery intensity, and then she threw open the front door and flew out. She wasted no time jerking open the door to the Hummer and climbing in. The seat was too far away, but she had no time to adjust it. She sat on the edge of the seat and put the keys in the ignition, bringing the car to life. She backed out of the driveway carelessly, knocking down the mailbox on the way.

She sped down the streets, not bothering to stop at stop signs or turn on her turn signal. She never put her foot on the brake, because she could never afford to slow down. She passed every other car in front of her. They were going too slow. She needed to hurry.

Maria glanced at the time. The plane was scheduled to leave at 10:00, so they would begin boarding at 9:45. It was already 8:45, and she still had a distance to drive to get to LAX.

Maria cursed when she got on the interstate and realized that she was going in the wrong direction. She wished she was smarter. She wished she knew exactly where to go, and she wished that she could just get there without taking up time, without pushing that 9:45 deadline.

It took her about ten more minutes to get back on the interstate going the right direction. She cursed when a truck almost ran her over, but she didn’t bother to apologize when she ran into the back of the car in front of her. She continued recklessly down the seemingly endless stretch of highway, looking at the time every five minutes. 9:30 now. It was taking too long.

She knew no thought. She only knew action. She needed to get herself to that airport, and she needed to get herself to Michael, because she couldn’t give him up.

After what seemed like forever, Maria arrived at the airport. 9:41. She slammed on the brakes right at the front entrance in what was clearly marked as a no parking zone, and she tore open the doors, jumping out. She left the door hanging wide open with the keys in the ignition, not caring.

“Miss, you’re not supposed to park there,” a regulatory man told her as she ran into the building. “Miss?”

Maria ran through the glass double doors of the entrance and found herself in a crowded mass of confusion. She pushed people out of her way, not bothering with politeness. She cut through the line to the American Airlines desk, ignoring the angry shouts from the people who had been waiting. She turned and elbowed a guy in the face when he grabbed her arm and tried to pull her back.

“Miss, you need to wait in the back of the line,” the man at the desk told her politely.

“There’s a flight going to Santa Fe that’s supposed to leave at 10:00 this morning,” she told him, her words coming out in a rush. “I need to know what gate it’s at.”

“Miss, please go back and wait in line like everyone else.”

“Just give me the damn gate,” she told him, not willing to put up with any of his bullshit.

“Miss--”

“I said give me the damn gate!”

He looked at her, almost frightened, and the nodded quickly in agreement, typing something into his computer. “Santa Fe,” he said, “departs at 10:00 a.m.” He waited while the computer brought up all the scheduled American airline flights. “Ah, yes,” he said pleasantly. “That would be gate 152.”

“152?” Maria shrieked, not liking the sound of the large number. “Okay, um, where is that?”

“There’s a directory close by.”

“Tell me where it’s at!” she told him.

“Uh . . . okay, you need to get on the transportation system and--”

“The what?”

“The monorail,” he clarified. “Take the monorail over to our second building and . . .”

Maria didn’t wait for any more instructions. The guy was taking too long. She sprang out of line and back into the crowds, pushing her way past people, vaulting over their luggage as it stood in her way. She noticed the clock. 9:44. No . . .

“Monorail,” Maria whispered to herself as she looked up and saw a sign that pointed the direction in which she would find the transportation. She hurried down a long hallway into a dark tunnel that resembled a subway station in many ways. Her shoes pounded desperately on the concrete-like floor as she ran to catch the last train, just as it was taking off.

“You’re in quite a hurry,” an old woman said as they rode the fast-paced monorail over to the second building. “Trying to catch a flight?”

“Trying to catch a guy.”

When the doors opened, Maria wasted no time. She hopped off and hurried out into the chaos again. She knew where she was. She had been to that airport many times with her parents. It was where she had first met Michael.

“Up,” Maria told herself, spotting the escalator. “I have to go up.” She got on the escalator, feeling that it was going much too slow. She pushed past people, running up like it was the stairs and found herself on the floor where all the gates were. The place was huge, and from her position, it looked almost endless.

“152,” Maria told herself, looking around to find what gate she was at. Her heart sank in her chest when she saw a sign that told her that she was in a section for gates 200-300. 300? Gate 152 was back farther yet.

Maria felt tears stinging her eyes as she saw another clock. It was 9:49. It was getting later, much too later. She took off running again in the direction of what were supposed to be the lower numbered gates. She tripped and fell as she was running, but she got up right away, unable to stop. She was so close now, she couldn’t give up.

Eventually, the people cleared, and Maria was virtually alone, making her way as fast as she could to gate 152. She passed gate 168. 167. 166.

Michael, she thought. The thought of him made her run faster, flying past 165, 164, 163, and 162.

“Final boarding call, flight 1245, Las Angeles to Santa Fe on American airlines,” a voice over an intercom system said. Final boarding call.

Maria passed the remaining gates and saw gate 152 come into view. She saw him. She saw him standing with one duffle bag over his shoulder, the other at his feet. He was in the back of the line with his hands in his pockets, looking down at the ground. She felt like her heart stopped when she saw him.

He was just about to show a worker his plane ticket when she rushed up, out of breath, and shouted his name. “Michael!”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

He heard her voice. He heard the one thing he was going to miss most, and he heard it just the way he liked it: saying his name.

He turned to face her, and he could tell by the look on her face, the desperate intakes of breath, the trembling hands, and the relief in her eyes that she had hurried to get there. He thought briefly that he had never seen her look more beautiful than she was right then and there.

They gazed at each other in a wonder of silence for what seemed like a long time, and then she spoke. “I drove,” she told him simply, shrugging her arms a little. “I drove out on the interstate. One of the really busy ones. I almost got in about five car accidents, but I think I’m doing better.”

He couldn’t help but smile at her simple conversation. Maria was strange and funny in her own way like that, and it was one of the many things he had grown to love about her.

Love.

“Okay,” she said, obviously nervous. She ran her hands through her hair and then let out a shaky breath. “I’m here,” she said, stating the obvious, “and I didn’t come with a speech prepared or anything, which is probably a good thing, ‘cause I failed speech class pretty miserably. So I’m just gonna stand here and talk, and you can just stand there and listen and not say anything, because I really need you to not say anything right now.”

She was really a fascinating girl. Woman.

“Okay,” she said again, “so, I guess . . . I guess I wanna start out by telling you . . . I’m sorry.” A few tears sprang to her eyes. “The things I said . . . I was really cruel with some of the things I said, and I didn’t mean it. I really didn’t. I was just angry, and I just said some stuff. I don’t know why, I just did. I didn’t mean to say all that about Roswell, about Tess and Josh and your dad. I didn’t . . . I didn’t mean it when I said we’re not friends, ‘cause you’re my best friend. You know that. You’ll always be my best friend. I wasn’t thinking when I said all that. I-I wasn’t thinking clearly, Michael.”

He understood, and he understood why she hadn’t been thinking clearly.

“And I know that we are . . . or were more than friends. I hope that it’s are. I wanna say are. I don’t wanna start using the past tense, Michael.” She was crying some now, struggling to get her words out. “You’re about to get on a plane, and if you do, then I’m gonna have to say were, and that’s not something I’m looking forward to or wanting. So that’s why I’m here. I can’t just let you get on this plane and go away without trying to get you to stay. I just . . . I can’t do that. I can’t not tell you some of the things I haven’t told you. There’s . . . there’s so much to say and not enough time to say it in, and I know I’m standing here fumbling over all my words and screwing up all my sentences, but I’m just gonna say it the best way I know how, and that’s just to say it.”

Maria . . .

“I may have been wrong about a lot of things earlier when we were arguing,” she said, “but I actually did make some sense. I did have some kind of a point. You keep telling me that I deserve better, which is not true at all. You keep telling me that I deserve better, Michael, but we both know I’m not gonna find anybody better, at least not anybody better for me. You’re the one person in this whole wide world that can put up with my complaining and handle all my crying. You’re the one person who knows how to make me smile when I’m frowning. You’re the one person who finds a way to make me laugh when I’m crying.” She looked down at the floor and then back up at him, smiling a little. “Will and Grace marathons, Michael,” she reminded him.

He smiled. Yeah, he loved those.

He loved her.

“You see the thing is,” she continued, “I’ve spent basically the last year of my life being around you, and you would think that I’d be sick of you or something by now, but I’m not. I can’t get enough of you. I wanna be around you all the time, and it practically killed me to be apart from you just for a few days. I don’t know how I’d manage if I’m apart from you forever. I-I don’t even wanna think about it, because it makes my stomach hurt, and it gives me a headache, and it . . . it makes me feel like I can’t breathe.”

He knew that feeling. He was feeling it now, as if he were leaving his oxygen, his air, his way of living in the life.

“I’m not gonna find anyone that stops the aches and helps my breathe,” she said, “because anyone else isn’t gonna be you, Michael. It’ll be someone else, some other guy, and he won’t be better for me. He’ll be second best. That’s not fair to him, that’s not fair to me, and I don’t think it’s fair to you, either, Michael, because I really don’t think you wanna leave.”

She was right. He didn’t.

“I know I said that you do, but that was me being angry and crazy, remember?” She made fun of herself. “I can see it in your eyes, now, Michael, you don’t wanna go. You wanna stay here, and that’s what I want, too. I want you to stay here. I want you to stay in my life. I need you to stay in my life.” She wiped the tears from her cheeks again. “I know I sound all desperate and pleading here, but that’s because I am desperate, Michael. I’m not afraid to admit it. I’m scared. I’m scared that what I’m saying isn’t going to matter or change your mind, and I’m scared that you’re gonna get on that plane anyway and leave, so I’m desperate. I need you to stay. I want you to stay, because, even though you don’t realize it, I . . . I look at you, and I see what I consider to be, like, the most perfect guy.” She smiled, blushing. “I know it sounds cheesy, and you probably don’t like being called perfect because it’s kind of a girly word, but I’ve always thought that, even when we first met and I hated your guts.”

He laughed a little, remembering.

“I can’t come up with one thing I would add to you. I can’t imagine one thing I would change about you, and that’s rare, Michael. It’s completely rare, and I’ve never thought those things or felt those things about anybody before. And I’ve definitely never said them to anybody.”

She was amazing. He couldn’t stop thinking that thought.

“I know I must sound like a blubbering idiot,” she said, “but I hope I got my point across. I hope you understand what I’m saying. So I’m just . . . I’m just gonna ask you now to stay. Please don’t go. Please, Michael. I’m begging, yes, but I’m okay with that.”

Maria . . .

“Don’t leave. Please don’t leave. I need you here. I want you here. Please.”

He was staring into her eyes, staring into her soul, staring into her, when she finally said what he had been longing to hear, what she had been longing to say.

“I love you so much.”

She loved him. She really loved him. Maria wouldn’t say that to just anybody. The past year had taught her a lot about what hate was. She had hated her parents a great deal of the time. She had hated Max, but now she was saying that she loved him. So much!

“Sir, if you’re boarding the plane, I need to ask that you board now,” the woman collecting the tickets told him in a rehearsed and mechanical voice, so unlike Maria’s emotional, lively one.

Michael turned to look behind him at the ticket counter and the long corridor that would lead to his plane, that would lead to New Mexico. It would lead away from Maria.

Michael looked at his lover again, meeting her eyes, and he knew. There was no way. There was no way that he could get on that plane and leave her. Not now. Not ever. He would try, but it would never happen. He belonged with Maria. She knew that, and now he knew that.

Dropping his bag to the ground, he strode over to her, taking her into his arms. He didn’t say anything. He just kissed her, much like the time he had first kissed her, letting himself dissolve into the heaven that was her.

“Maria,” he whispered, pulling back and pressing his forehead against hers. He cupped her face with his hands, saying her name again. “Maria . . .”

“Oh god, Michael,” she cried as the reality hit her. He wasn’t leaving her. “I love you,” she told him again, hugging him tightly against her. She cried tears of joy onto his shoulder.

“I love you,” he told her, wishing that he said it more often. “Maria . . .”










TBC...

Part 56 (Last part!)









Nothing else had ever felt better than this. Nothing else would ever feel better than this. Nothing else would ever feel more secure, more comfortable, more warm. Nothing else would ever feel this right.

Maria laid in Michael’s arms, naked under the sheets. They had gotten a hotel to room for the day and night, and they had spent the entire afternoon making love, talking, laughing, joking, and sometimes just holding each other, basking in the glory of each other’s company.

“I never could have left,” he told her suddenly, running one of his hands through her hair as the other rubbed her back and held her against him. “I would have tried, but I never could have gone through with it.”

“Really?” Maria asked. “You looked like you were pretty close to going through with it to me.”

“I know,” he said, “and I would’ve been able to get on the plane and find my seat and wait for take-off, but I would’ve gotten back off. I would’ve gotten off the plane right at the last minute, maybe, but I wouldn’t go. I couldn’t.”

Maria smiled and tightened her hold on him. “Nice to know,” she said.

He pressed his lips to her forehead. “I love you,” he said again.

“I know,” she told him. “You’ve told me about ten times now.”

“Getting tired of hearing it?”

She shook her head. “Never.”

“Good,” he said, “because I plan on saying it a lot.”

She liked the thought of that. “So do I,” she told him, lifting herself up so that she could look into his eyes. She leaned forward and pressed her lips to his. “I love you, Michael,” she murmured against her lips. “I should have told you that so much sooner.”

“It’s not an easy thing to do,” he said, “telling someone that.”

“It’s monumental,” she agreed. “That’s why I was so shocked when you said it to me. I mean, you haven’t really ever loved anyone before, have you, Michael?”

“Nope,” he said. “I didn’t have anyone to love.” She pulled her in close again, holding the kiss longer. “Now I do,” he said, finally pulling away.

Maria looked into his eyes, and she knew. He wasn’t going to leave her, ever. He wasn’t going to think about leaving her ever again, and she would never feel the need to be with anyone else but him. The misfit guy who had gone to jail twice and grown up with a drunk in a trailer park was the greatest guy in the world, of that much she was sure, and he had picked her. He wanted to be with her, for some reason or another.

“I’m so lucky,” she told him. “Not every girl gets to be with a guy like you. I don’t deserve this.”

“What?” he almost shrieked.

“I don’t,” she said. “You keep telling me you’re not good enough for me, but I think it’s just the opposite, Michael. I’m not good enough for you.”

He shook his head. “Not true, Maria. You know what? I think we need to get past this, thinking that we don’t deserve each other. That’s not what this is about. It’s about feelings, and I feel things for you, you feel things for me. We love each other and wanna be together, and that’s all that matters. That’s how it’s gonna be.”

“I like the sound of that,” she said, “but how are we gonna get everyone else to realize that? My mom and dad, Michael, I don’t know if they’ll ever accept this.”

He shrugged. “Who cares? This isn’t about them.”

Maria smiled. “You’re right.” She settled back down into his arms, resting her head against his chest. “So what are we gonna do now? We can’t keep doing what we’ve been doing. We can’t keep defending our relationship.”

“You still wanna stay with your parents?” he asked her.

She shook her head vigorously. “No, not at all,” she replied. “I just wanna get out of there for good. They’ve managed to make me miserable in practically every way possible for awhile now, and I just wanna be free of them.”

“We can do that. We can get outta there. We can get our own place.”

“Our own place,” Maria echoed in consideration. She liked that. She wanted that. “Let’s do it,” she said. “Just you and me. Nobody else.”

“Nobody else.”

“We can stop back at the house tomorrow morning so I can get some of my stuff,” she said, already thinking about what she would say to her parents to make them realize that they were wrong. “Then we can go.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Michael brought the Taurus to a stop right in front of the huge DeLuca residence, looking over the house. It wasn’t a home unless Maria was in it, and Maria had clearly expressed her desire to get away from it, to get away from the people inside of it. The home was just a house now. They were going to find a place for themselves, a place that was smaller, of course, and most definitely less elegant, but they were going to make that place a home.

“You ready?” he asked her.

She took a deep breath and nodded her head. “I’m ready,” she said. She opened up the door and stepped out, and Michael got out and went around to her side of the car, reaching out and taking her hand in his. He looked at her one last time and gave her a small smile, and then they started for the front door. Maria didn’t even hesitate. She reached out and rang the doorbell, because they were now walking into a house that didn’t belong to them, that wasn’t their’s. They were visitors now, and that actually felt good.

Amy’s hand went to her mouth when she saw them, and tears sprang to her eyes. “Oh, Maria,” she said, reaching out and hugging her stepdaughter, completely forgetting about Michael . . . again.

“You’re back,” Jim commented as he joined them all at the door. He didn’t bother to reach out and hug Maria or show any thankfulness that she was okay. He noticed that they were holding hands immediately, and Michael decided to spell out the obvious for him. “We’re together,” he said.

Amy looked the two of them over, and her facial expression did not become cold and harsh like her husband’s. Maybe she realized that they were meant to be together, but even if she did, she would never voice it. Not with Jim around. She would not allow herself to openly have a different opinion than he had.

“Where did you go?” Amy asked.

“I went to the airport and stopped Michael from leaving,” Maria said. “I drove the Hummer. It’s waiting for you at the airport, if you’re wondering.”

Jim sent her an icy glare.

“Then we got a hotel room,” Michael explained. “Spent some time together. Talked about some things.”

“Yeah, and you see, we realized something,” Maria said. “We don’t have to put up with all of this. We don’t have to deal with all your crap. Believe it or not, we are two mature young adults, and we can be together whether you want us to or not.” Maria let go of Michael’s hand and pushed past her parents, stepping into the house. “That’s why I came by to get my stuff.”

“What?” Amy asked. “Your stuff? For the Hawaii vacation?”

“No,” Maria said, heading up the stairs. “Forever.”

“Yeah, forever,” Michael agreed, letting himself into the house. “You see, you two may not realize it, but that’s what Maria and I are. Forever. We’re not gonna let anything or anyone come between us. We’re not gonna leave each other. We’re gonna be best friends for the rest of our lives, and we’re gonna be in love for the rest of our lives, too.” He leaned against the couch, extremely relaxed and loving the silence Amy and Jim were emanating. “We’re gonna be together forever,” he told them simply. “Maybe you don’t realize it or maybe you just don’t wanna believe it, but Maria and I are supposed to be together.” He looked at Amy. “Or maybe you do.”

Amy shook her head. “No,” she said. “You and Maria are . . .” She trailed off.

“Not supposed to be together,” Jim finished for her.

“Right,” Amy agreed, looking at the floor and unable to meet Michael’s line of gaze. “Not supposed to be together.”

Michael laughed a little. “I guess I should’ve seen that coming,” he said. “You agreeing with your husband. That’s nothing new. It’s all you’ve done for the past year. Have you completely forgotten how to think for yourself, how to have your own opinion on things?”

“That’s enough!” Jim shouted. “I will not tolerate this!”

“Shut up,” Michael told him, sick and tired of the old man. “Do you have any idea what kind of guy you are, what kind of guy you’ve become? You’ve completely alienated Maria, and you’ve completely brainwashed Amy into thinking exactly what you think!”

“What kind of guy am I?” Jim asked, incredulous. “What kind of guy are you, Michael? You got busted for drugs when you were fourteen! You went to jail in October for vandalizing your school’s gymnasium! You barely graduated high school!”

“I made some mistakes,” Michael admitted, “I’m not saying I didn’t. But I worked past them. I found a way to be better.”

“Better?” Jim shouted. “You’re not better! You’re not anything! You’re not anyone!”

“He’s the guy I’m gonna spend the rest of my life with,” Maria suddenly joined in, coming down the stairs with a blue duffle bag. “He’s the love of my life. Isn’t that someone?”

“That was fast,” Michael commented, taking the heavy bag from her.

“It’s not everything,” she told him, starting back up the stairs. “I’ve got a few more things I want.”

“Do you need any help, baby?” Michael asked her.

“No, I think I got it. Thanks, baby.”

Michael laughed quietly to himself at the outraged comments Jim was making under his breath.

“What are you two planning to do with your lives?” Amy asked, slightly less outraged than Jim. “What are you going to do about the future?”

Michael shrugged. “Take it day by day, I guess. Isn’t that the best way to live your life?”

“It’s the worst way to live your life!” Jim shouted, fuming with anger. “It’s reckless and irresponsible and stupid!”

“Stupid?” Michael echoed, not liking the word. Maria had told him once when he had first arrived in Long Beach that her parents had the tendency to make her feel stupid, and she hated it.

“Yes,” Jim said, “and you and Maria are both stupid individuals for doing this!”

“Really,” Michael said, “because you know, I’m not the one who’s losing my daughter.”

“What?”

“Stupid is letting her go, letting her get this far away in the first place. Any guy with half a brain can see that Maria’s not just the type of girl that you can forget about and replace with something or someone else. She’s not the type of girl you can let go. I know that. I realized that. That’s why I didn’t leave her.”

“How dare you come in here and insult me in my own house!”

“Jim, just calm down,” Amy pleaded, wrapping her hands around his arm. “Listen, I think we just need to sit down and talk this through before such a hasty decision is made.”

“Talk?” Michael repeated the word like he didn’t know what it meant. “I don’t think so. I’m tired of talking. So is Maria. We can sit there and profess our love for each other over and over again, and you two still won’t believe it. It’s like talking to a brick wall, to two brick walls. It’s pointless, and it never accomplishes anything.”

Jim and Amy continued to argue with Michael for several more minutes about everything, ranging from important topics to trivial ones. They were finally silenced when Maria came back down the stairs with two smaller duffle bags. “Ready to go?” she asked Michael.

He nodded. “More than ready.” He took the two bags from her and loaded himself up with all three. “I’ll go put these in the car,” he said. He headed outside, glad to be away from Amy and Jim. Those two were suffocating.

“You’re making a huge mistake!” Jim could be heard shouting even from outside the house.

“A huge mistake?” Maria could be heard in retaliation. “No, Dad, you are! You’re letting me leave, and you’re making it perfectly clear that you’re never going to accept my relationship with Michael. If you never accept it, then you’ll never be a part of my life. You’ll never come to my wedding. You’ll never see my children, and yes, Dad, eventually, Michael and I will get married and have a family. You won’t be a part of it.”

Michael stuffed all of Maria’s bags in the trunk of the Taurus and shut it. He leaned against the car and watched as Maria exited the house, fiery and passionate as ever. Even though he didn’t think it was possible, he fell even more in love with her in that moment when she stood up to her parents.

“We’re gonna be together forever,” Maria told her parents, her back to them as she made her way to the car.

“You can’t know that,” Jim said, standing in the doorway with Amy.

“You’re right. I can’t.” Michael tucked Maria safely under his arm, holding her against him. “But I do,” she said. She smiled at Michael, and her arms went up and over his shoulders. “Kiss me,” she told him. “Right in front of them. Kiss me.”

He had no problem with that. He pulled her against him and pressed his lips to hers, holding the kiss for as long as he could before air became an issue. He glanced up to the house to see that Amy was looking away now and that Jim was staring daggers at them both. “Let’s go,” he suggested. He opened up the passenger side door for Maria and let her in, and then he went around and got in the driver’s side.

“So,” she said before he put the key in the ignition, “I still have two non-refundable tickets to Hawaii.”

Hawaii. Yeah, they needed to go to Hawaii. Michael started the car, and they took off down the road for the airport again, together this time, not apart. They left Amy and Jim both standing in the doorway, wondering what had happened and why, and they took off for the future, the bright and shining future full of hope, happiness, love, and most importantly, each other.

Michael and Maria left Long Beach that day. They left to be together.

Forever.










THE END





Thank you for all the wonderful feedback, and thanks for sticking with this story through all of its 370 pages! There probably won't be a sequel, just because I'm content with it ending this way and my new fic is taking up so much of my time. The new fic is called "Meet Me in the Middle." It's looking like it's going to be even longer than this one was! I'm on page 122, and Michael and Maria don't even really like each other! So, anyway, I hope that you'll enjoy that fic, too. I also have a short series that I will post on this board called "Odiamos, Adoramos," so keep an eye out for that one.

Once again, thank you all very much! Your kind feedback has pushed me to continue writing! I hope you've enjoyed reading this story as much as I have writing it!

Thanks!

-April