Roswell Fanatics

****

Liz’s POV

“I love the way you taste,” I tell him as I nibble and lick his body.

“You’re not getting where I want you fast enough.”

I grin wickedly. “Tough. People who tease other people, get teased back. The circle of life.”

My hand slips around his length and to my surprise and pleasure, I feel him harden more. “But enough teasing.”

****

Max’s POV

She works me until I think I’m going to pass out.

“Liz, I need to…”

She replaces her mouth with her hand. “It’s okay Max, you can let go.”

When her mouth replaces her hand and she does wonderfully arousing things to me, I have no control left in me, I completely let go.

It takes a while for my body to stop humming and by then, I’m on the bed and am not exactly sure how I got here.

“You okay?” she asking hovering worriedly over me.

I lift my hand and tuck her hair behind her ear. “I’m fine. That was just…wow.”

“Thank you,” she grins. When we kiss, I can taste me on her. I tug her down and in a few quick moves, I have her under me.

“What will you do with me now?” she asks.

Her lips are used and bruised, her eyes dark and drunk. She is a sight.

I watch her eyes widen with surprise then flutter close with a contented sigh as I slip into her.

****

Liz’s POV

I meet his movements thrust for thrust, hard and fast at first, then slow and tender. When I close my eyes to let myself be swept away, he cups my face in his hand.

“Don’t close your eyes Liz. Look at me.” The tender passionate love in his voice has me staring at him in surprise at first, then as we drive each other to the edges of pleasure, I look at him because I can’t look away. I’m caught up in him, with him, it’s almost like I can feel what he’s feeling and he can feel what I’m feeling. Like we’re connected. It’s intense and magical and brings a tear to my eye.

He kisses it away and we proceed to make that hour count.

****

Max’s POV

Liz and Xan stay for the weekend. I spend time with them between scenes and whenever I have any free time with them and the cast. To my surprise, although it really shouldn’t have been, Liz and Angelina get on really well. We talked about how she feels about me doing intimate scenes with her and she’s as uncomfortable as would be expected but she knows I love her and wouldn’t cheat on her and vice versa.

It’s the strangest thing being in love, everyone pales in comparison to the woman who owns your heart.

When it’s time for them to go, I can’t quite let them go.

Her forehead rests on mine. “We’ll see you when we see you,” she tells me.

“I know. It’s just that…”

I trail off, how can I explain that now that I’ve had her, I’ll crave her even more?

“I know.” She kisses me one more time, our mouths fuse, our lips caress, tongues explore, our mouths hold, linger and let go.

****

Me and some of the crew are driving around our new location, Vegas, during our break when I see her larger than life. I have to blink a few times to make sure I’m not hallucinating.

“Hey Max, isn’t that your girl?” asks Jude.

I stare at the billboard ad for Viencenzia’s Alter-ego. It’s a blend of dreamy spring greens and yellow, it’s Liz in summer shorts and pants, sweet as sugar. Other images are of Liz, her hair blowing in the wind, dressed in an elegant suit and exotically enchanting dress. I know she’s beautiful, but seeing her touched up and all, makes her jaw droopingly stunning.

“I think so.” I flip open my cell and dial her number.

“Hey babe.”

She’s in a playful mood. I love it when she calls me babe.

“Guess what I’m staring at?” I ask.

“It could be anything. Do I get a clue?”.

I ditch the clue-giving idea, I’m too curious to play along.

“I’m staring at a billboard of you or someone who looks exactly like you, advertising Alter-ego.”

“Really? In Vegas? Do you like it?” she asks.

“It looks good.”

“Then it’s me. I wanted it to be a surprise for you. Mark Stevens, head of the campaign, liked Rath’s shots of me and signed me up. The launch party is a week from today. Can you make it? Don’t worry if you can’t I know you’ve got a busy schedule and all.”

When she pauses to take a breath, I finally speak. “I’ll see what I can do. I can’t believe it, my girlfriend the model.”

“It’s just for this. It was an opportunity. Are you okay?”.

She knows me too well.

“I just feel a little out of the loop,” I reply.

“I didn’t meant for it to be like that. I just wanted you to get this out of the blue reminder of me to make you smile.”

Who can be mad at that?

“It did,” I tell her. “I’m proud of you.”

“Thanks. Oh damn, that’s the other line. I’m expecting a call from Karen.”

“I’ll let you go then,” I tell her. “Love you.”

“Love you right back.”

I hang up and stare the billboard in wonderment. I go away for a few months and my girlfriend becomes the face for a high profile fashion fragrance.

I lead a bizarre life.

****

Liz’s POV

The last time I saw Max was at the launch party for Alter-ego. He flew over to be with me for the night. I was beyond touched. The whole night was completely surreal, I wore one of Viencenzia’s gown and with Max on my arm, I felt like a princess.

After that night, I’ve become part of the media buzz, it’s so weird. Everyone wants to find out about the woman who ‘ snagged Max Evans, who is the face of Viencenzia and working on a book with Karen Rei’. I just did this for fun, now it’s become this thing. I expected attention, but not this much. I even had to do a few interviews and photo shots for a few magazines. I’ve kept those to a minimum because I want to maintain some semblance of privacy but according to Christy, I had to give them something. As well as that, Karen and I have been working on the as yet untitled book. It’s going well.

Life is good, but in an our, it should get better. Max’s filming has been put on hold for a month, so he’s coming home for the time being for Michael and Maria’s wedding, which is in two weeks, and for me and Xan.

I can’t wait.

****

Max’s POV

I unlock the door and am two steps inside when the sight before me shocks me into dropping my luggage.

She’s wearing a red sexy bra and pants, her lips are painted in a similar colour and her left foot is decorated with a silver anklet.

“Hey.”

I’m surprised to find my voice working. “Hey.”

“You tired?” she slinks towards me.

I open my mouth to reply but never get the chance to because she’s in my arms with such force that we stumble back into the door.

“I missed you,” she whispers in my ear.

“Me too.”

She kisses me hard and rough before moving to take off my clothes.

“I figured it would save us time if I wasn’t too dressed,” she tells me.

I step out of my trousers. “Good thinking.”

We should take this to the bedroom or somewhere more appropriate but decide to screw that when I’m free from my boxers.

I nip her lips. “Now you’re a lot dressed.”

Not giving her a chance to react, I switch our positions and have her pinned against the door. Starved for her, I tug her out of her underwear. Lust drives through me when I cup her and feel her heat.
I lift her hips. “I have to have you,” I tell her in a harsh strangled voice unlike my own.

I slip into her and she clamps around me. My mouth seeks and tastes hers. Frantic and helpless against the clawing need inside of me, I take her against the door. Her cries merge with mine until out of control and slick with sweat, we violently climax together.

****

Liz’s POV

I sit leaning into him. We didn’t have the strength to go anywhere but the floor. I feel tired, used but incredibly satisfied. I lift my head and catch the content look on Max’s face.

“Welcome home.”

I feel the movement of his chest a he chuckles. He plants a kiss on my head. “Good to be here.”

We sit there for a little while longer until we’re steady enough to get up and make our way upstairs.

When I saw him at the door, a painful tug of heart of how much I missed him, how much I care, sent me into his arms. It scares me how much I love this man.

He stops by Xan’s room to check on him before taking a shower while I fix him a meal.

****

I’m not hungry, I just watch him eat as we talk. He tells me about filming and I tell him about the progress of the wedding.

After that, we spend time with Xan until I finally have to force a yawning Max into bed.

“Tuck me in?” he asks.

“It’s too hot for that,” I reply.

I crawl onto the bed and pull him along until he’s resting on my chest. “How’s this?”.

“Better.”

****

It’s been a week since Max came back and life is better than good. Especially our sex life. We’re working our way through the house. Last night it was the stairs, this morning, it was the kitchen. It’s crazy how much I want him. When we’re in the same room, there’s no way we can’t touch, just small touches here and there, but they must happen otherwise I’ll feel empty. It’s bizarre and scary but I like it.

****

Max’s POV

I’ve got everything sorted out. It didn’t take long to arrange. The living room is decorated in roses and candle light. I thought the bedroom was too obvious, besides, so much as happened in this room, it’s fitting that this should happen here.

Xan is staying over at Maria and Michael’s for the night and Liz will be home from shopping and doing girl-things in about ten minutes.

I am beyond nervous and more than excited. I know she loves me but I’m not sure she’ll say yes. I haven’t told anyone what I’m doing, I guess it’s because I really don’t know what she’ll say. My relationship with Liz is up in the air; we know where we stand with each other but we don’t. I know what I want in this relationship long-term wise but I’m not sure what she wants exactly. Tonight, I’ll find out.

****

Fifteen minutes later, I hear the front door open, the rustle of shopping bags and the click of her heels coming nearer.

She turns into the room and gaps. I stuff my hands tensely in my pockets.

Putting the bags down, she comes towards me but stops a few steps away. “What’s going on Max?”.

“Come here.” I hold out my hand for her. Throwing me a quizzical look, she humours me and takes my hand. Taking a shaky breath, I begin.

“Liz, you are the one person I never though I could have as the love of my life. You’re the one I’ve never gotten over and if you ever broke up with me, I’d pick up the pieces but would never get over you.
You own my heart. I love watching you do the ordinary, making you smile, taking care of you and our son, being with you. I want to be with you forever Liz,” I get down on bended knee, reach into my pocket and produce the small box that’s been weighing at tonne ever since I bought it.

I open it and she covers a her mouth with a trembling hand.

“Marry me.”

Her fingers reach out for the ring, but then she pulls back. She doesn’t know it, but she hold the rest of my life in her hands.

“Are you serious?” she asks in a hushed whisper.

“I want to become a one woman man for the rest of my life. I’d never joke about that,” I reply.

“Oh.”

She stares at the ring, at the room and then at me with shimmering eyes.

“Liz, will you marry me?” I ask again.

“Yes,” she nods. “Of course I will.”

****

****

Liz’s POV

I watch stunned as he stands up and pulls me into his arms.

I just said yes to marrying Max Evans!!!

I lean into his touch as he strokes my cheek and bends down to draw me in a tender kiss.

I can’t help but sigh in absolute bliss. This is where I’m supposed to be, with him.

“I love you so much.” The emotion in his eyes brings tears to mine. Before I can respond in words, he feasts on my lips and neck. His hands caress the length of my arms, trace the contours of my body and flare up passion, wild and rampant within me. I want to take him now but first thing‘s first.

“How’s Xan?” I ask.

“Fine. Spending the night with Michael and Maria,” he replies. “Which means, we have the house to ourselves. I have you to myself.”

“Whatever will you do with me?” I ask playfully.

I arch into him as he nibbles my ear lobe. My fingers seeks out the hair at the nape of his neck.

“I’d rather show than tell,” he replies and with a kiss that has me burning for him, he proceeds to show me.

****

Max’s POV

We made love on the couch and then stumbled to our bedroom where we tasted and feasted on each other until we were too tired to move.

I don’t think I’ll ever grow tired of the smooth slide of our bodies moving together or that pleasured fluttering of her lashes or the way her eyes grow dark and blind when an orgasm shudders through her.

She is as insatiable for me as I am for her. It baffles me, but pleases me at the same time.

She’s asleep now and I watch her. She matters so much that it scares me. I can’t believe she said yes. She matters and she’s mine forever.

****

Liz POV

I don’t know what time it is when I wake up, but Max is still asleep.

I lay there watching him, wondering how I managed to get him to love me enough to want to marry me.
How is it that I’m enough for him?

My gaze drifts to the ring box. I never did get the chance to try it on, we were otherwise distracted. I pick it up, open it and just stare. It’s beautiful, a white diamond band with a simple beautiful crested diamond. Perfect.

I slide it one and hold it out for inspection. My hand starts to tremble, that’s when everything goes wrong.

****

Max’s POV

“Max!”.

Her voice and prodding pulls me from sleep. The lazy smile I started to flash her fades when I take in her expression.

“What’s wrong?” I ask sitting up.

She bites her lip. A sign of nervousness. “I can’t marry you.”

I think my heart stopped for several beats there.

“What?”.

She takes off the ring and puts it in the box and hands it to me. I stare at it, not touching it. She places it inbetween us.

“I can’t marry you,” she repeats.

“Are you having second thoughts.” I’m panicking here. “ It’s okay to have second thoughts.”

“I’m not having second thoughts okay? I know I can’t marry you okay?”.

“No, it’s not okay. I asked you downstairs and you said yes,” I tell her slowly trying to get a grip on myself. “You slept with me and now after you’ve had your fun, you’re saying no?”.

I feel used and not in a good way.

“It’s not like that,” she protests.

“It seems that way.”

“I don’t want you to be mad.”

I feel like hurling something breakable against the wall. “I’m not mad Liz. Where did you think this was going? I wasn’t just going to keep living with you.”

“I know. I want to marry you Max, it’s just…”

****

Liz’s POV

“Just what?!”, he blasts.

I have to stop myself from running out of the bed. “I can’t marry you. I put on that ring and my hands started shaking and I couldn’t breathe. I felt closed it-”

“I’m not trying to trap you Liz. What kind of game are you playing?!”.

His eyes flash dangerous, his jaw is painfully clenched. This is a conversation not to have in bed. Crimes of passion happen in bed.
I slide out wrapping a bed sheet around me.

“I’m not playing any game,” I tell him honestly.

There’s so much going around in my head, I can’t think straight.

“Then what is it then? What do you call what you’re doing to me?”.

The devastation on his face has me speechless.

“Fuck it,” he throws up his hands. “I’m tired of this.”

I get a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. “Tired of what?” I croak out.

“Of being the one fully into this relationship.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I mean that while I’m fully committed to you, you have one foot in and one foot out. I mean you sleep with me in my bed, cuddle up next to me and then go back through the nursery to your room. I mean you’ve still got that house of yours to go back to. I mean you have escape hatches Liz.”

Okay, I know anger may not be the way to go here, but I can’t help it.

“What the hell do you expect me to do? Sell my house because I’m living with you? We haven’t even been together for a year Max!”.

The look he gives me is lethally cold, the same as his tone. “We’ve been together for more than that and you know it Liz.”

****

Max’s POV

“I don’t know what you want me to say Max. Just because I won’t marry you, it doesn’t change how I feel about you. Our relationship before your proposal was fine,” she tells me.

“But I want more. I want you, fully or not at all.”

She blinks back in shock and I too am surprised by my ultimatum. “You don’t mean that. I love you.”

I feel like she just slapped me. “You what? I can’t do this. I can’t hang in limbo with you. Just get out. Get your stuff and leave.”

I can’t believe the words are leaving my mouth, but they are, they have.

We stare breathing hard at each other for five tense seconds. My heart’s screaming ‘idiot’, my brain too, but pride has me mute and standing my ground.

I will her to break me, to push me, but I see the lightening flash of stubbornness and wisp of hurt and confusion, then- nothing. She closes off to me, I can’t read her anymore and I feel something in me die.

“Fine,” she says softly. She doesn’t rush out of my room but calmly walks out, slamming the door.

I stare at the door open-mouthed. That’s not what was supposed to happen. It wasn’t supposed to go this far.

I just want her to want to be with me as much as I do her. Now I’m going to lose her. She leaves, she’s not coming back.

That was my ultimatum, all or nothing right?

“Fuck that.”

****

Liz’s POV

I’m in a nightmare. Or maybe the part before this was a dream and now I’m awake. I swipe at the tears running down my cheeks and rub the blur from my eyes. I look around my room not quite functioning right. I don’t know what to do, what to take, where to start.

I sink onto the bed.

How did things go so wrong?

Ah well, it doesn’t matter. The other shoe has dropped and it’s time I picked up what I can from this wreck and get packed.

****

Max’s POV

I can’t let her leave. There is no way she is leaving this house.

I burst into her room without knocking and straight away launch into my pleas for her not to leave. My words come to an abrupt halt when I see her sitting on her bed, my sheet wrapped around her, looking like a lost child.

“I couldn’t pack,” she tells me in a broken voice. “I can’t leave.”

My system flood with relief.

****

Liz’s POV

“Guess we’re stuck together,” he tells me. He doesn’t get any closer to me and that’s my fault.

I freaked out on him and didn’t make a lot of sense. All he heard, all I said was that I couldn’t marry him. I didn’t tell him why.
I need to figure out why and from the look in his eyes and the guarded way he stands, I know I need to tread carefully.

“Max, could you give me a few minutes to get my thoughts together. Then can we talk?”, I ask softly.

“Take all the time you need. Come find me,” he responds in a clipped tone before turning to leave.

“Max,” I call out to him.

His shoulders drop and casts a glance at me over his shoulder. “It hurts Liz.”

I nod. This isn’t going to be easy. “I’ll come find you.”

****

AN: Hey all, I know, I know I'm evil and sorry to say that this is another cliff hanger.

I'll be better in the part after this, I promise,

About this next part...all I gotta say is faces from the past are making a come back oh and for those of you not jazzed about Mark? read on...

Lisa1783 wrote:
i really really need to know liz's reason for not marrying max. what other issues can they possibly have left????

I know, lol, that's what I thought when I was writing it, but this issue seemed like the next one for the couple to tackle.

Lisa1783 wrote:i've been kinda lurking here for the longest while but i can honestly say that everytime i come to rf.net, i immediately check for an update on this fic. it's just such a wonderful fic with all this love and passion and angst and fun and i'm just left breathless after every part.

:blushes: thanks for that. I'm glad that I could get you out of lurkdom and that you're enjoying the fic.

NorafanofMaxandLiz wrote: Your fan,

NorafanofMaxandLiz

Wow, I'm totally honoured.

Ellie wrote: Right now her relationship is nice and undefined, and as Max said, she has those escape hatches. She thinks she needs them, they both have to work through that. It sucks Max is getting hurt like that, but I'm so glad he went after her to stop her from leaving. In the end I think it was exactly what the situation called for.
Perfect isn't easy, she needed to try to leave so she could see how much it hurt and what it would cost her and to see that he'd come after her and not give up. He needed for her to run, prove she couldn't leave even though it was her initial reaction, and so he would go after her and take an active roll in preserving his relationship with her.
sweet.

kay_b wrote: She's scared of marriage, not of marrying Max but of the married life itself. She has so many things going for her right now and she feels that once she marries Max it won't be the same. She has enjoyed her independence for so long that disrupting it probably means being trapped in chaos for her.

Seriously, are you two reading my mind? lol

CME wrote: Usually the whole freaking out about commitment thing happens to men not women. Intriguing.

That's the fun I've had with this fic. Max sorted out his issues early on, not that he had many, now it's Liz who has to sort through all her stuff.

VenusStar wrote:Think back to all of the time that Max spent trying "break her" (which, btw, pissed me off to no end. It was very "she's a wild horse I have to tame and conquer" which SOOOOOO utterly wrong of him to want to do).

Loved that! , lol


Thanks to:

Alma
anonymousarfan
BehrObsession
begonia9508
cherie
CME
Dreamer06
Ellie
Emz80m
flyawayraven
FSUMSW94
hellsbitch666
janesdilemma
Jason's Lover
kay_b
Lisa1783
Liz86000
Mica
NorafanofMaxandLiz
RASaero611
RoswellScripter
RosyLady
su-lyn
Surfgirl02
taressa05 - I liked the term 'commitment issues' , so much I had to use it.
Timelord31

Loved reading all your feedback, it was encouraging, it was interesting. You all tried to understand Liz, got mad at her, as I did when I was figuring out where I was going with this. Your reactions tell me I'm definitely doing something right, so thanks

Oh and by the way, thanks to all for the nomination for Fic That Left You Bouncing in Your Seat for an Update . ...ummmm....I'm guessing that after this part, you're gonna go vote for me,

****


PREVIOUSLY

Liz’s POV

“Guess we’re stuck together,” he tells me. He doesn’t get any closer to me and that’s my fault.

I freaked out on him and didn’t make a lot of sense. All he heard, all I said was that I couldn’t marry him. I didn’t tell him why.
I need to figure out why and from the look in his eyes and the guarded way he stands, I know I need to tread carefully.

“Max, could you give me a few minutes to get my thoughts together. Then can we talk?”, I ask softly.

“Take all the time you need. Come find me,” he responds in a clipped tone before turning to leave.

“Max,” I call out to him.

His shoulders drop and casts a glance at me over his shoulder. “It hurts Liz.”

I nod. This isn’t going to be easy. “I’ll come find you.”

****

Nice to meet you anyway - part 26b

Liz’s POV

I find him outside the garden with Xan. I just watch them for a minute, father and son…my family. I take a deep breath and make my presence known.

“Hey.”

He turns. My breath catches in my throat as I take in his dark handsome features and the torment clouding his eyes which mars his beauty. I still struggle to accept that I can affect him that way.

“Hey.”

He doesn’t make his way over to me. He shouldn’t have to. It’s not his problem that’s brought us here but mine. I sit on the chair next to him and try to find the right words to start off with.

So far I’m coming up with nothing.

“You’ll trust me with our son, but you still won’t trust me completely with your heart,” he speaks quietly.

I open my mouth to protest but a niggling part of me knows he’s onto something that I’m not quite sure of yet, so I just sit in silence.

“Why is that Liz?” he asks, “What do I have to do for you to trust me?”.

“I don’t know,” I reply honestly.

“You know if you think hard enough about it. You told me that once.”

Me and my wise words. I guess I should take my own advice now.

This is hard. I turn to him but he keeps looking down at Xan.

“I trust you, Max,” I try to fumble for clarity, but am getting nowhere. “I do and that’s the problem. I’ve never trusted anyone with myself as much as I have you. I depend and rely on you and love you so much that it scares me. It frightens me that someday you’ll look at me and wonder what you’re doing with me and I won’t be able to handle that.
You have the power to hurt me more than anyone and it scares me,” I finish.

This time, he lifts up his head and turns to me. I’m taken aback to see the threat of tears in his eyes.

“And I suppose you don’t think I feel that way?”. He asks the question so calmly and quietly that I’m put on edge.

“I think you’re crazy in love with me right now,” I carefully reply.

“Too crazy in love to think straight,” he finishes off my thoughts. “Liz, I am wildly passionately in love with you. Sometimes I want you so much it scares me. Do you hear me? it scares me too. You have the power to break me, to hurt me to a dangerous degree. Do you think you’re the only one who’s scared? Do think this is easy for me?”.

His eyes are blazing now and I think it wise to keep quiet and let him talk because I’ve never heard him say this before.

“I’ve changed. I’ve come a long way since that first night we met and it’s not just been for me, it’s been for you. It’s all for you Liz.”

It takes me few attempts to get my mouth working and when I do, my voice is thick with emotion. “I never asked you to change. I never asked you to fall in love with me.”

He blinks and it’s like he’s a different person. He shifts away from me. “No you didn’t,” he says coolly, “My mistake.”

I know I should be stronger than this, but hearing him say that hurts. “That was harsh.”

“I’m sorry,” he apologises softly. “I’ll go put Xan down.”

I let him walk away because I know he’ll come back. He always comes back even when I don’t expect him to.

****

By the time he comes back, I’m as ready as I’ll ever be.

“When Jules proposed to me, I turned him down because you were the only man I could see saying yes to. The only man I wanted to marry. When you asked me, I said yes because I wanted to. I want to marry you Max,” I tell him.

“But.”

“But, I put on the ring and panicked. The idea of marrying you, of spending my life with you I could deal with. The reality of it, of what that ring means, I can’t deal with yet.”

“You want to marry me, but you don’t.”

He’s ticked off. He has every right to be. I don’t think there’s an easy way to have this conversation, so I just get it done.

“I want to marry you, but I’m not ready to be your wife, to be married.”

“Everyone says we’re like a married couple already.”

I nod in acknowledgement. “That’s different. We live together, sleep together, raise a child together but I could walk out on you or you me and we wouldn’t have those vows, those promises hanging over us. I wouldn’t walk out on our marriage. Neither would you.
This year, these past few years with you, have been a rocky road with twists and turns. The past few months have been steady, smooth. I’m just getting used to the way we are now and suddenly, you want that to change…but I’m not ready for it yet.”

We sit in timeless silence. I don’t know what he’ll say, if he’ll want to break it off. If he does, I don’t know what I’ll do.

“Do you know when you will be? Ready, I mean?” he asks.

I can’t stop the tears from streaming down my cheeks. “I can’t say.”

He nods, opens out my palms and places the ring box in my hand, closes my fingers around it, followed by his. He squeezes my hand, I am unprepared for what he says next.

“Let me know when you are.”

He stands up, looks down at me with a ghost of a smile before walking away.

****

Max’s POV

I find her asleep in my bed. I’m surprised and pleased to find her there. When the woman you love turns down your proposal, you need all the reassurance you can get that she still wants you.

I didn’t think I’d get back this late, I should have called or returned her concerned voice mail messages, but I needed time alone, away to process.

My heart’s still sore, but I know she loves me, that she does want to marry me, but not now. I’ve known since she was pregnant with Xan- or deep down, even before that- that I’d marry her and I prepared for it. She didn’t, hasn’t yet. She needs time, I’ll give her time. I just can’t be without her.

I strip down to my boxers, slide in next to her and watch her sleep. This little bewitching creature is perfect for me. I love her with an astonishing intensity which makes it worse when she hurts me.

I can’t resist kissing her goodnight. But because I hurt, I don’t bring her into me as I usually do, instead, I turn my back on her and will myself to sleep.

****

Maria’s POV

“In three days, you’ll be Mrs Maria Deluca-Guerin and you’ll look beautiful,” Liz tells me.

We’re having the last of the last fittings for my and their dresses. Liz, Isabelle and Courtney are going to be my bridesmaids.

“Won’t I just,” I agree staring at my reflection.

Everything has been sorted, everything is ready. Now, I just have to wait away three days. Not that I’ll be bored, there’s Max’s Dream In Colour Productions to celebrate their first project. The possible drama there is that Tess is attending. Then there’s my bridal shower the day after and then my bachelorette party the night before. I can’t wait to marry Michael, but at the same time, a niggling bit of fear and uncertainty is interfering with my joy.

****

We finish up the fitting and head out for lunch where the topic of conversation is Liz and Max.

“I still can’t believe that you, Miss-Romantic-Dreamer-Liz Parker, has commitment issues,” I tell her.

“Neither can I,” she shrugs. “But I do.”

“Heck, I don’t blame you,” says Courtney. “Who wants to be legally tied down just yet? It‘s like a frigging prison sentence at our age”.

Three eyebrows are raised in her directions.

She smiles sheepishly. “I doubt I’d do a good job of extracting my foot from my mouths, so I won’t bother.”

We all laugh about it, but her words hit something in me that I don’t want to investigate right now.

Shaking the unease away, I focus on the now frowning Liz. “I take it things are not going well?” I ask her.

“Things are fine, just different. Like he doesn’t touch me as often as he used to and sex? We haven’t had any in three days! That’s not normal for us.”

I feel her pain, three days of no sex with an adonis like Max? That’s harsh.

“…It’s just strange. I know he said he was okay with me not marrying him, but I don’t know, maybe he’s not and I’m not sure what I should do with that. I mean, should I move out to give him space?”.

Has she learned nothing? But hey, seeing as I’m going to be married in a few days, I think I’d do the same in her situation.

“Don’t you dare”, jumps Isabel.

“I have to agree with Izzy,” I tell her. “Liz, the guy put his heart, dick and balls into your hands when he proposes. You accepted, lifted his hopes, then squashed his heart, dick and balls after the sex. His ego isn’t exactly going to bounce back in a flash. You‘ve gotta give this time.”

“I know. It’s just, it sucks you know?,” she tells us. “I hate it when we’re like this and the thing is, I could easily change things and say yes again, but that would be a lie. I’m not ready.”

I fix her with a comforting smile. “No one said relationships were easy.”

“That’s true,” Courtney puts in. “But, you have tomorrow night to drive him wild.”

“With Tess there you mean,” Liz says with a frown.

“Why the hell is she coming again?” asks Isabel.

“Because he put their friendship,” she rolls her eyes, “on hold for me and I think it’s about time he stopped. I shouldn’t dictate who he should and shouldn’t be friends with. I wouldn’t want him to do that to me.”

“Yeah, but said ‘friend’ is an ex who wants to get in his pants,” Isabel comments.

“I’m not over-joyed with it, but,” she shrugs, “I have to trust him sometime right?”.

“Better you than me,” quips Courtney.

“Still, let’s fix you up with something that will definitely test that no sex rule he seems to be holding on to,” I tell her.

There is no way Max would cheat with Tess, but might as well remind him, as well as that gerbil, of what he’s got at home.

****

Max’s POV

I’m talking to Tess but I’m only half listening to what she’s saying. Most of my attention is on Liz and Mark Stevens.

I don’t like the way the guy’s looking at my girlfriend or the personal little touches he’s sneaking in.

I know I’ve been slightly off with Liz for the past few days, but that’s the only way I’ve managed to deal everything. I know I haven’t touched her just for the sake of it, kissed her or made love to her in days, so I have no particular right to be jealous, but damn it, she’s still mine.

There are plenty of beautiful women here tonight, but there’s something about Liz, about the fluid shimmering black Viencenzia number she’s wearing - that elegantly fresh beauty that’s appealing not only to me, but to quite a few people in the room.
When I left her to mingle, every time I pinned her down, she was talking to someone and the majority were male.

When Mark tucks a stray strand of hair behind her ear, I’ve had enough. I excuse myself from Tess and make my way over.

He sees me before Liz does and from the shift in stance and his expression, he knows that I know exactly what he’s thinking about when it comes to Liz. He alerts her of my impending arrival. She turns and smiles. Her beauty strikes me like an arrow I happily take right in the heart.

“Can I borrow my girlfriend for a minute?” I ask him. My arm is already around her waist.

He reads the silent message and nods. All slick and charm and smiles. “Sure.”

****

Liz’s Pov

As we dance, I can’t help but take note of the tension in his muscles and the flare of anger in his eyes.

“Everything okay?” I ask.

I think he just growled.

“That guy wants to get into your pants,” he replies roughly.

“Who?”.

“Mark.”

Surprised into a laugh by the resentful tone in his voice, I immediately stifle it back when his clenches his jaw. “Max, we’ve talked about Mark before, he’s not into me like that.”

Yeah sure, he makes comments about my beauty and sometimes looks at me in a weird way, but he works in the model-beautiful people world, chatting about looks must be his default setting by now.

“He knows I’m taken,” I add, “Plus, he has a beautiful girlfriend who he’ll probably marry in the next two years.”

Okay sure, his girlfriend didn’t know about our friendship until she called me off his phone, but we talked and she sounded nice and he told her in the end. Although I still don’t get why he kept it from her in the first place.

“Liz, I’m a guy, I know that look in his eyes when he’s looking at you.”

Aww, I’m touched by his jealousy. I can’t help it this time, I grin, lean up and give him a quick kiss. “Whatever the look in his eyes, to me, he’s a friend and you’re my boyfriend.”

He abruptly pulls me flush against him. “Hey-hello,” I trail off when I feel him hard against me.

I look up at him and am scorched by the hot hunger in his eyes. It’s the same look he had when he first saw me dressed up tonight, but he held himself back then.
I swallow air and try to breathe. His head’s leaning down to me, I don’t think he’s holding back anymore and it’s about ti-

“I hate to interrupt.”

My head snaps in the direction of the voice, irritated by the interruption and by the fact that the woman doesn’t seem to be all apologetic.

“But, can I steal Max for a second?” she asks.

She wants Max. Of course. It’s been a while since I’ve been to one of these things in Max’s world. I’d almost forgotten about the Max fan club- whore club, whatever.

“Not a problem.” I smile loosening my hold over him to let him go, but he holds me close.

“Liz, this is my old friend Stephanie,” he squeezes my waist softly and I don’t understand why until the name clicks. “Steph, this is my girlfriend Liz.”

Stephanie. Blowjob Stephanie, who from the way she’s looking at Max, probably wants a repeat of last time if not more.

We exchange pleasantries before she leads Max away.
First Tess, now Stephanie and at a time when Max isn’t too happy with me. He could relapse to his old ways. If he did, I’d kill him.
I’m jealous, a little bit, but not as worried as I expected to be.

A tap on my shoulder draws me out of my thoughts.

“I don’t believe I’ve had the pleasure of a dance yet,” Mark tells me with a smile.

“Well, who am I to deny you that one pleasure?” I grin taking his outstretched hand.

****

We’ve danced to about three songs and in that time I’ve managed to pinpoint Max and Stephanie. Their having a conversation, more her than him. My eyes narrow at the way she’s leaning in way too close. I want to pound her to dust.

I shift my eyes away from them. Watching them won’t help make anything better. Besides, I trust Max. I wholeheartedly trust him.
My eyes widen at the sudden realisation. A bit of jealousy is human I suppose but I trust him and the other women don’t worry me. They meant and still mean nothing to him, they were amongst the many while I mean something to him. Something important enough for him to want to marry me.

I’m more than over-joyed, more than ecstatic.

I. Trust. Max.

Relieved beyond measure, I tune back into conversation with Mark.

****

****

“Did I mention that you look really spectacular tonight?” Mark asks.

“Just a few dozen times,” I reply.

“I can’t say it enough. This,” his fingers trail down the curve of my sides, “This dress and material fits you so well. It glides with you when you walk.”

“I think it’s safe to say you work for a quality fashion house, Stevens.”

His eyes light up. “I like it when you use my last name like you do with Evans.”

“I only do that with friends and when it feels appropriate,” I tell him.

And we’ve become fast friends ever since that day in his office. He’s an interesting and funny guy in a different way from me. I find his sense of humour new and refreshing and I guess, I’m different from most clients he’s worked with who are used to his industry.

“I like you Liz,” he tells me.

“Well, I like you too Mark,” laughing as he spins me around and brings me back to him.

“I like your…interesting sense of humour, your bluntness, your intelligence, your beauty-”

“Are you wanting me to respond in kind and boost your ego some more?” I joke.

“I can’t imagine you and Max together. I mean, I saw you come in and dance and everything, I just can’t imagine it.”

“Want me to walk up him and make out to help you visualise?”.

“Let’s have an affair.” He says it suddenly and so casually that I chuckle away the idea that it’s more than a joke.

“I’m serious. You and me, let’s have an affair,” he continues.

My brain suddenly shuts down and then flicks back on again, but I’m slow on the uptake.

“Huh?”. I’m shocked to stand still for a second before he smoothly coaxes my feet and body back into dancing.

“An affair. Where, in our case, two people in separate relationships, decide to have a relationship with each other,” he explains.

I’m still slow on the uptake and so say the first thing that comes to me.

“I’ve got a boyfriend,” I tell him.

“Who was looking pretty cosy with his ex and who is now to be seen with that sexy woman he left you for. I know Max Evans’ rep. Since you’re a smart woman, so do you. He’s into open relationships.”

Okay, my circuits are connecting faster now.

“He was. Now with me, our relationship is strictly exclusive.”

“Maybe, you think so, but Max-”

His know-it-all, casual tone is starting to tick me off.

“What Max choose to do is his choice. But speaking for myself, I don’t like to share my partners. You have a girlfriend.”

I’m enraged for her. This guy is scum. He made some excuse about her being busy to come tonight, but now I’m wondering whether he even asked her.

“Who is beautiful, intelligent and only half of what I want. I fulfil her needs, problem is, she’s not half her and half you. We’ll get engaged, get married, have a happy life, but I’ll miss you Liz. I’d have liked not to have an affair, but we can’t have everything all in one sometimes.”

I’m morbidly fascinated with the fact that he can do this and act like it’s nothing.

“You’re a bit of a bastard aren’t you?”, I muse.

“It’s what I expected you to say. I love that bluntness about you. You might not be up for the idea now,” he continues, “think about it.”

He’s smiling acting as if this is a normal everyday thing.

What the hell is wrong with people?

“I don’t need to, the answer is no,” I tell him.

“May I interrupt?”. It’s Max and from the expression on his face, I’d say he knows something just happened here.

“Of course.” Mark is all charm and innocence, as if he didn’t just proposition me. “I’ll call you,” he tells me before leaving us alone.

I dazedly stare after him until Max steps into my line of sight.

“Everything okay?” he asks.

If I tell him right now, Maria isn’t going to make it through the night unharmed. He might be a jerk, but I like the guy and don’t feel like ending this night by posting bail for my boyfriend.

Ignoring his question, I wrap my arms around his neck. We fall into a slow dance despite the fact that there’s a fast song playing.

“What happened with Stephanie?” I ask.

****

Max’s POV

She’s switching topics and I’ll let her for now. I saw the way Mark’s fingers were dancing over her; he touched her hair, trailed his slimy fingers across her arms and back. She didn’t seem to notice, she was too focused on whatever he was saying to her, but I noticed.

“She made an offer,” I reply. “I told her I have a jealous girlfriend who doesn’t like to share.”

The smile on her lips is small but the one in her eyes lights up her face. This is the first time we’ve been to one of my industry parties - even though I’m throwing it- and I’ve not screwed up with her.

“What happened with Mark?” I ask.

She moves to answer but hesitates. I’m sure she’s carefully selecting her words. “I told him I didn’t share,” she finally replies.

“I didn’t like the way he was touching you,” I tell her.

“You were watching?”.

I don’t want to get into an argument with her.

“I didn’t like it,” I repeat.

“You don’t have to worry, I think I’ll cool off our friendship for a while,” she tells me.

“Can I ask why?.” I’m trying to keep my voice, calm and light.

“You can, but you won’t get an answer right now.”

“Why not?”.

“Just because,” she replies with an sing song voice.

And just like that, we’re back on track.

“About the last couple of days,” I begin.

“You did what you had to do,” she tells me.

“I hurt you.”

“I hurt you and pissed you off. Sometimes there’s no other way. Are we okay now?”

“I love you.”

A wry smile dances across her mouth. “You still haven’t answered my question.”

“Yeah, we’re okay.”

I tuck her hair behind her ears and smile.

“You haven’t touched me like that in days,” she comments.

“We haven’t made love in days,” I add.

She bites her bottom lip increasing the appeal of her mischievous smile. “What do you think we should do about that?” she asks.

My mouth crashes down on hers and everything else disappears. I missed this. It hasn’t been too long but I’ve missed this.

“Max,” she breaks away panting.

“What?”. I blink back the inventive images of sex with Liz, I had playing in my mind.

She moves my hands off her cute ass and onto her hips. “Let’s not give everyone a free show.”

I glance around and notice that a lot of curiously amused faces are watching us.

Blushing I turn back to her. “I want you.”

“Ditto,” she stands on tip-toe and places a light butterfly kiss on the tip of my nose. “But, we have to mingle. Oh look, there’s Quinn and George”, she grabs my arm, “let’s go say hi.”

She’s doing this to tease me. It wouldn’t be hard to convince her of a quickie somewhere but I want to take my time with her. I want to peel off that dress and enjoy her.

“Two more hours tops,” I lower my voice and speak into her ear. “Then I don’t care, I’m taking you home.”

****

Abby’s POV

I pick up the phone and dial five of the digits before hanging up. I’ve been debating on whether to call her ever since my final attempt at stopping him let me standing outside his house watching him being driven away.

I’m more than his secretary, I’m like his surrogate mother and I’m worried about him. His obsession with isn’t healthy. She made her choice and he has to let her go, but Julian isn’t used to losing, especially losing things of the heart of which he only has a few.

I could call Liz Parker and warn her. I’ve been trying to, but I haven’t, I won’t. He has to go through this, he has to find out for himself that it’s truly over. But never having truly met the girl and observed her and Max Evans, maybe he’s right.

Maybe he, as opposed to Max Evans, is the best for her and that third time will be charm with him and Liz. I’ll let him find out and be here no matter what the results.

****

****

Michael’s POV

She knocks carefully on the door. I call out and tell her to come in and lock the door behind her.

“Max said you wanted to see me?”.

I turn to her, dressed up in my tux, nervous and excited as hell and ready to get married.

“Maria’s gonna ditch me,” I tell her.

If I have a bride.

“What?”.

I run worried, frustrated fingers through my hair. “The whole not seeing each other until our wedding thing? We’ve stuck to that, but we’ve been talking on our cells. I just rang her a few minutes ago, she picked up and hang up. I tried again, it went to voicemail. Sent a text message, no reply.”

“Maybe she’s put her phone somewhere, turned it off. Michael, we left her alone to have some time to herself. She was ready and excited to get married,” Liz tells me.

“She’s picked up the phone every time even if it’s to tell me to stop calling except for this time. At least you turned Max down in private and before you made plans. I’m not all touchy, share you feelings but I’m scared Liz,” I tell her honestly. “I think she’s going to bolt and I need you help.”

“What can I do?” she asks.

“Talk to her. Calm her crazy busy brain down because I can bet you she’s freaking out in there.”

She smiles. “You know her so well.”

“I love her,” I tell her simply.

“I’ll go check on her, but I’m sure everything’s fine,” she tells me.

****

Liz’s POV

Everything is not fine.

Maria is indeed, freaking out and having drastic second and third thoughts about marrying Michael.

“I mean, who am I kidding Liz! This is me we’re talking about here. Since when was I all about ‘til death do us part’? What the hell do I know about marriage? Raised by a single parent here!”.

“You know how it’s not supposed to work,” I offer. “And that includes Michael not walking out on you.”

She bites her lips nervously. Maria never bites her lips.
“They should have teaching classes as a legal requirement on this or have a step by step guideline to how not to screw it up. What if I make a lousy wife?”, she asks despondently.

Shit, this is not my area of expertise. A wedding, a marriage hangs in the balance and he asks me to help him out?!

I take a breath and take a shot. “What if Michael makes a lousy husband?” I counter.

“I’ll be stuck with him,” she shrugs.

“And him with you.”

“Marriage. Me!!. That was your deal,” she turns on me, “you were supposed to go first. I was supposed to be still wild and free. How can I get married?”.

It takes me a few beats to realise that she asked a genuine question and wants a reply from me.

“You’re asking a person with marital commitment issues that question?” I counter.

“Uh huh.”

Damn. She really wants an answer.

“You should be talking to someone who knows what they’re talking about,” I advise her.

“I want to hear what you think.”

Oh crap. Okay.

“You love Michael?” I ask.

“I do.”

“He loves you?”.

She smiles. “He better do.”

“He doe. Want to spend the rest of your life with him?”.

She nods blinking back tears. “I do.”

I close my hands over hears. “Then calm the freak out session and go say those two words that’ll seal the deal.”

“Really?”.

I could tell her yes, of course, go for it, but I can’t make that decision for her.

“If that’s what you really want,” I reply. “Maria, you and I aren’t the same person, my commitment issues are not your issues. Marriage is a trust, a promise, it takes hard work but the rewards are endless. If you want to go through the good and the bad with Michael, then go through with today. If you don’t, then don’t. That’s it. That’s my pep talk, that’s all I got.”

I hope it’s enough.

I give her a hug before standing up to leave. “I hope we’ll see you out there. But if not, I’ll still keep you around as my friend.”

That results in a relieved smile from her. I smile back and leave her to think.

****

It’s a torturous few minutes, while the wedding march plays and we await Maria’s entrance. She misses the first intro, the second and just when I think I’m going to have to calm Michael down, on the third intro, she appears and she’s beautiful and radiant.

I watch them exchange their vows through blurred vision. I look across as Michael kisses his bride, his wife and lock eyes with Max. The unspoken that passes between us says it all.

That could be us, it will be us…someday.

****

Max’s POV

The wedding reception goes smoothly. We all make speeches about the newlyweds, drink, dance, eat and have fun. I all the while, am thinking that I can’t wait until Liz and I do this.

****

After a few dances and a lot of champagne, I leave her to go off to the gents completely unaware of what’s about to happen next.

****

Liz’s POV

I’m by the bar ordering a drink when I feel someone’s eyes on me. It’s not Max. It’s weird but, I know what being stared at by him feels like. Thinking for some irrational reason that maybe it’s Mark - even though he didn’t get an invitation - and that I don’t want to deal with him right now, I turn around with a frown in place.

My muscles slacken in shock. Tall, dangerous and delectable, he stands a few feet away staring at me.

What is he doing here?

We meet mid-way and just stare. To the untrained eye, he looks okay, his usual gorgeous self but to me, I see the tired brooding behind his stunning features.

“Haven’t we been here before?” he begins.

I smile. “And we’ll be here again.”

“Don’t I get a hug?”.

****

Julian’s POV

She flies into my arms and gives me a tight hug which I reciprocate.

“I missed you Jules,” she tells me.

“Missed you too L.P.,” I breathe her in but I lessen my hold on her, but don’t let her go.

“I thought we’d start off with phone calls before we moved on to visits,” she comments.

I’m sure she can feel the rapid beating of my heart.

“I like to give the things that matter most my close personal attention,” I respond.

Reluctantly, I let her go, stand back and holding her hands in mine, I study her.

“You make beautiful bridesmaid, but you’ll make a breath-taking bride,” I tell her.

“How did you get in here?- wait, I don’t wanna know.” Her brows furrow. “Do you think reconciling at a wedding is healthy considering?”.

“I think it’s a fitting place for us to be.”

And the best place for us to start again.

****

Kyle’s POV

“Sooo, who’s gonna tell Max that Mr rich-billionaire’s back in town?” I ask.

“Hey, we’re exempt ‘cause we’re newlyweds,” says Michael.

“I’m out,” jumps Isabel.

“I vote Kyle,” Maria says.

I panic at the chorus of agreement that follows.

“What? Why?” I ask.

“You bet on the guy and lost,” Maria replies. “I say this would be your last task in paying up.”

I’m not the only one who bet on Julian, Isabel and Jesse did too, but I’m not stupid, I hold back from saying so.

“Fine, but after this, I’ve paid up.”

“Consider it done,” Maria agrees.

****

I find Max on his way back into the room. How to break it to him…

“Hey.”

That’s a good start.

“Hey.”

“You know in horror films when you think you’ve killed the psycho but he gets up again and never dies?” I start.

“Okkkay…” He looks at me puzzled.

“Bad example. You know how exes come back to bite you in the ass sometimes or knock you over the head?” I try.

“I know you’re not sober, but are you that far gone?” he asks.

“Oh screw it. I’m not one for tact…”

And we’re already in the room anyway.

“…Julian Reed is here and is all chummy and cosying up to Liz.” I point to the bar Julian is rubbing the ring with the giant rock he gave Liz with his thumb. I look back at Max, his jaw clenches and same goes for his fists.

Damn.

I step back as he strides forward. I’m gonna watch this from a safe distance.

****

“Jules, Liz and Max triangle round two. Anyone taking any bets?” I ask around the table.

“I can’t take anymore vicarious emotional wringers through them,” Courtney replies.

“Same here,” inputs Isabel.

“Hey, we’ll be on our honeymoon, we’re in the clear,” says Michael.

“I juts hope it won’t last as long as it did the last time. Either way it should be interesting,” I comment.

“You’ve got nosy woman tendencies, Valenti,” Noah tells me.

“Guilty as,” I admit. “Keeps me entertained when I need to be.”

****

Julian’s POV

She’s still wearing the ring. I love that fact. She could have taken it off- it has to mean something. And the way she smiles at me, touches my arm, the way we interact…it’s so very us

“How long are you staying?” she asks.

“Two weeks at the most,” I reply. “I have business in these parts.”

I could have taken care of it over the phone or flown over for a few meetings.

“Uh huh.”

I can tell she doesn’t believe me. I grin back caught out. I took the business as a sign to come out here. I haven’t stopped thinking about Liz. I’ve tried. I’ve tried to get over it, but I can’t.

I gave up on us too easily, I haven’t fought for her. Isn’t that what you’re supposed to do for love? Fight for it?.

This battle for Liz has to be carefully and cleverly waged because I know she wouldn’t appreciate or stand for it.

“Hey.”

I didn’t notice him approaching but he’s here.

“Max.” I assess him coolly.

“Julian.”

He doesn’t know it yet, but before long, Liz is going to be with me where she belongs.

I’ll grind him into dust.

****

TBC

AN: Hey all, I'm pretty busy at the weekend, so thought I'd post a day early. Thanks for all the feedback and for voting

P.S. I know the ring thing has been driving you guys crazy, it drove me crazy too, but as to why Liz still wears it, that will be explained in this part...enjoy

PREVIOUSLY

“How long are you staying?” she asks.

“Two weeks at the most,” I reply. “I have business in these parts.”

I could have taken care of it over the phone or flown over for a few meetings.

“Uh huh.”

I can tell she doesn’t believe me. I grin back caught out. I took the business as a sign to come out here. I haven’t stopped thinking about Liz. I’ve tried. I’ve tried to get over it, but I can’t.

I gave up on us too easily, I haven’t fought for her. Isn’t that what you’re supposed to do for love? Fight for it?.

This battle for Liz has to be carefully and cleverly waged because I know she wouldn’t appreciate or stand for it.

“Hey.”

I didn’t notice him approaching but he’s here.

“Max.” I assess him coolly.

“Julian.”

He doesn’t know it yet, but before long, Liz is going to be with me where she belongs.

I’ll grind him into dust.

****

Nice to meet you anyway – part 27a

Max's POV

"Max, we're not having conversation again," Liz argues as she walks away from me.

Not letting up, I follow her into the kitchen. "We'll keep having it until you realise what that guy is up to!".

I can't help it, something about him rubs me the wrong way. Ever since Michael and Maria's reception, the guy has been monopolising Liz's time; taking her out, taking her and Xan out so that they can 're-establish' their friendship.

What a bunch of crap. That guy wants Liz permanently and she's too blind to see it.

"His name is Julian Max and he's my friend. We.are.friends. That's all!".

That's all huh?

I slide over to her today's newspaper's showbiz gossip section. She picks it up and rolls her eyes at the pictures.

"So we went out for lunch, then for a walk. Wanna know what we talked about? Not you and me, not him and I in a dating sense. We talked about what I was doing, what he was doing, what our friends were doing, about what's going on in the world-"

"He's got his arms around your waist, hugging you Liz," I interrupt.

The picture, of which there are a few others, is of Julian with his arms around Liz's waist, lifting her off the ground while she's laughing. They look very close and very intimate and as usual the media is speculating, which isn't making me feel any better.

"We were goofing around, teasing, tickling, and then that," she points to the picture, "we were fooling around as friends do Max."

****

Liz's POV

I am so tired of having this argument with him. He seem to think Jules is here to win me back. The idea of that is completely ludicrous because I turned Jules' proposal down and broke things off with him because I chose Max. Julian understood that, which was why he left and now he's back to put our friendship back on track again.

Max's crazy jealous boyfriend behaviour was amusing at first, now it's just plain irritating and making me angry. Even if Jules did want me back, he's acting as if I'd fall for his charms. Julian means a lot to me and Max's continued resentment towards him is starting to put a strain on our relationship and that's not good but I don't know what to do about it because I want Jules to continue being in my life.

The door bell rings. It's Jules, he'd called before and said he was ten minutes away. He's taking me to this gallery he read about near the coast. I've been his official tour guide to L.A. when he gets the time but sometimes, it feels like he's the one giving the tour.

"You better go. Wouldn't want to keep him waiting," he sneers.

I sigh tiredly. I don't know how much longer I can handle this. It's only been a week but it feels longer. I don't want to leave him mad or sulking especially when there's nothing to be mad or sulky about.

"Look. Just say that Jules does want to steal me from you," I resist the urge to roll my eyes at the words, "Just because he wants that, it doesn't mean it'll happen. I chose you, I choose you again." I cross over into his personal space and trap his face in my hands. He needs to know this. "I love you. Do you get that?".

He tries to avert his eyes from mine but I force him to look at me. "Do you get that?" I repeat.

"Yeah," he answers. The tension and anger has deflated from his stance and from his eyes.

"Good, then don't be ass." I stand on my tip-toes and kiss him hard and smack his delicious ass, "I gotta go."

I rush over to Xan's play pen and give him a quick kiss and rush over to the door.

I'm more than amused to find Jules, Kyle and Rath at the door. Rath and Max had second and third encounters and they're better than okay now. They're actually friends.

"Hey guys, I thought you were coming over later on," I tell them.

"We finished up early," Rath replies.

They both sizing up Jules, Rath more out of curiosity than anything, and vice-versa.

"Okay, well," I grab Jules' hand leading him away. "See you later."

****

He opens the passenger door for me. "Your friends are suspicious of me," he comments.

I slide in and wait until he's in the car before responding. "Word has gone 'round about what went down during your last appearance."

"Ah."

I bite my lip. Just to be sure, I have to ask.

"Jules."

"Yeah?".

"This may be awkward and don't be offended but I have to ask, for the record because Max is just way too jealous paranoid-"

He smiles at me amused. "Liz, just ask."

"You're not here with some misguided plan to steal me from him or anything are you?" I ask.

It's so ridiculous when I say it out loud.

"Do you want to be stolen?" he asks.

He's got that playful sparkle in his eyes, but that's not an answer.

"For the record, I'm with Max and you and I are just friends," I tell him.

"So noted in the record book," he grins.

I know I'm blushing. "Sorry, it's just I had to ask, to put it out there."

"I understand. If I was Max, I'd be having problems with this too."

"He needs to get over it. It's driving me crazy," I confide.

He turns on the ignition. "Let's put Max's issues aside and go drink outrageously expensive champagne and look at art."

"Let's," I smile.

I like hanging out with Jules. When he last came, it was all about seeing if we were going to be a couple again but now that we've dealt with that, we can be just friends and hang out without that pressure. Jules has different interests to Max- not different, but more. I guess it's because he has grown up with money and has traveled nearly everywhere. He opens me up to new cultures and ideas.

It's refreshing.

****

Max's POV

"I hate that guy," I profess.

"Seeing as it was my first meet with him, I can't judge except he is beyond gorgeous," Rath comments. "Did Liz ever sleep with him? 'cause I'd bet he'd be amaz...ing".

He trails off as I slant him a vicious look.

"Where are they going today?" Kyle asks.

"Some gallery," I frown," Liz still won't see what he's trying to do."

"You got into it again?" he asks.

I nod. I hate fighting with her but I can't not when it comes to Julian.

"Max man," he begins. The tone of his voice instantly makes me defensive.

"What?". There's nothing wrong with what I'm doing.

"Arguing constantly over the guy isn't helping you in Liz's books," he replies.

"I can't help it," I sigh dumping myself onto a sofa, "Everytime I think about them- see those stupid pictures in the papers, when she talks about him, I see red."

Rath has that dying-to-interfere-but-trying-not-to face.

"Say what you want to," I tell him.

"Well, I wasn't there to watch the drama unfold last time, but Kyle's given me a summary and of what I know of our Dear Lizzie, I'd say your arguing strategy is pissing her off right?".

I think back to the blaze in her eyes before.

"She's getting angrier," I agree.

"Look Max, you don't like the guy. No one can blame you fro that, but Liz does. Before they were a couple, they were friends of some-sort. He means a lot to her and every time you pick at him, you're hurting her and pushing her further away from you. Heck if he had a plan to break you two up, that would be it. I'd say just leave it-"

Is he crazy?

"But-"

"Go punch something or whatever, but stop raging on the guy. He's only here a week longer, after that, it's phone-calls and what not, but bottomline is Liz is with you. She comes home to you," he finishes.

I grudgingly admit that he's making sense. As Liz has been telling me, she chose and chooses me. Julian can do whatever he wants and sure he grates at me, but if he's sticking around in her life, I have to find a way to deal.

It's just that....

"Of all the times to drop back into her life, why now? I mean it's like he knew when to drop in, just after Liz turns my proposal down, he swoops back in."

"The guy's bad-ass powerful, I wouldn't put that past him," says Kyle.

"Wonderful," I respond dryly.

I know Liz loves me and I do trust her. It's just the proposal declining still has its effects on me. She hasn't made a commitment to me and considering what Julian was to her...I'm just scared of losing her again.

****

Liz's POV

"This is really nice. I should bring Max here sometime, he'd like it."

We've had a bit to drink, left the gallery and are walking down the docks leading to the ocean.

"You'd know," Jules responds.

Our tongues are slightly loosened by alcohol and if my mind is as foggy as his is, then this should be interesting.

"You don't like him either?" I ask.

"I don't like him for the same reason he doesn't like me."

We both stumble to a halt, holding onto each other for support. Okay, so we're taking a cab home.

"I don't know why, what is that?" I ask.

His brows furrow in concentration. "Okay, maybe not exactly the same reason. He has you which is why I don't like him and he doesn't like me because he thinks I'm trying to have you for myself," he replies.

I snort out a laugh. "You two are just plain stupid."

We make our way to the railings, leaning on them for support. Closing my eyes, I lift my head higher to let the cool breeze brush past me.

"Nah, we just love that's all," I hear him say.

I smile. "Aww, that's sweet."

"You know what surprises me though?".

"What?".

The breeze is so fresh, so cooling, with my eyes closed I pretend I'm flying.

"That he hasn't proposed, that you aren't married. I had you for a week and I proposed."

"He did propose. Ring's perfect as well..."

I don't want to talk about this now. It doesn't produce happy feelings. "...I turned him down- postponed, long story. I have issues."

"Huh."

"Hmm."

I open my eyes and turn to him about to make some kind of joke I think- it all happens pretty quickly. I'm trying to work out what his intense expression is all about and then his lips are on mine, warm and probing. They instantly sober me up.

I push him away as well as taking a step back.

"Whoa Jules."

Oh crap, this is one of those nightmare situations where ex kisses you and then the dilemma of what to do next.

I only have one question. Why?

Someone really wants me to jump through a couple of hoops.

"Oh gosh. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." He looks mortified.

"It's..." I'm supposed to say it's okay, but it's not, not really. It's not like a felt anything- okay, so I did- residual stuff, but it's not the same as Max's kisses. Max's kisses are...more, more powerful, more breathtaking, more everything.

"I thought we were just friends," I say after a moment.

"We are. It's just that I was watching you just be and you looked so beautiful. Then all these feelings just came over me and I couldn't not kiss you. I'm sorry, it's the drink, residual feelings and-"

"It's okay," I interrupt. I was a bit tense at first but now I'm okay. That kiss washed away any crazy thoughts of me still having romantic feelings for Jules. What we had was great, but nothing compared to what Max and I have.

The kiss was just some one-time slip, everyone's entitled to one of those right? It didn't even last long and he feels bad and is very apologetic, Jules is never very apologetic.

"I don't want to screw up anything with you and Max."

"Don't worry about it. It's just a one time thing right? Like falling off the wagon," I tell him.

"Yeah, yeah of course. I'm just such a jerk, I can't believe I did that!".

"Don't worry about it Jules, one-time relapse, there's no need to tell Max and blow it out of proportion. Let's just forget about it. Deal?".

"Deal. I am sorry," he says again.

The sight of Julian Reed all vulnerable and apologetic has me amused. "Stop apologising."

"Okay."

"We should get going. Seems a good time as any to call it a night," I tell him.

"I don't want things to be awkward between us-"

"Jules, you're making it awkward. Loosen up."

He grins and suddenly he's back to his controlled self. "Loosened."

I laugh encircling my arm companionably with his as we walk. "Although, it happens again, I will have deck you," I threaten.

"I wouldn't expect anything less."

****

I don't get home too late, so I'm not surprised to find Max awake in the kitchen.

"Hey."

Julian kissed me.

"Hey. Just making some hot chocolate. Want some?" he asks.

Hot chocolate has become our drink since that memorable first date of ours.

The sensation of Jules' lips on mine suddenly floods into my mind along with guilt. I smile it away.

"Sure."

I slide onto a stool and watch him make the drinks. He's wearing a black t-shirt and jeans, his hair is a bit of a mess as if he's been running his fingers through it. He makes a pretty picture.

"How was tonight?".

Eventful.

"It was pretty good actually." I tell him about the gallery and everything about the night, save for Jules' kiss.

"Listen Liz, about you and Julian-"

"I don't want to fight about that right now Max."

He hands me my mug almost like a peace-offering. "I'm not going to. I just want to say that I'm sorry for pushing this..."

Come again?

"...It doesn't matter what I think his agenda is."

I open my mouth to say something but he holds up a finger for my silence. I comply because I have no idea what I would have said to him had the words come out.

"...He's important to you so I should make an effort. I realise that my questioning your friendship is hurting you, hurting us and that although I don't like him, I love and trust you. So if you say you're friends, I know from your part, that you're friends."


I love this man. I really, really love him. And after he's said what he's just said, it's definitely best not to mention the kiss.

"We're friends," I tell him.

"And us, what are we?".

The tension that's been festering between us for the past week vanishes. My eyebrows lift at the playful smile gracing his mouth.

I take his mug and mine and move them a safe distance away before hopping onto the countertop with him trapped between my legs. "We're a lot of things," I tell him.

Circling my arms around his neck, I lower my head and taste his lips until I can't breathe.

I know I have a stupid grin on my face when he stands up and entwines his fingers with mine. I love him and want him desperately.

Instead of kissing me on the lips, his kisses on cheek and then the other. "We're a lot of things. Like?" he muses.

Screw playfulness. I hitch my legs around his waist and with my arms already around his neck, I have him where I want him for now.

"Like, in a few minutes, we'll be lovers," I reply.

I arch into him as his teeth tease the sensitive area at the base of my neck.

Julian has nothing on Max.

"I like that," he murmurs before capturing my lips in his.

****

****

Julian's POV

I'm bored.
I'm beyond bored.

I met up with a few old friends, got drunk and ended up in this high-class discreetly exclusive strip club to unwind.

I look over at Christopher and Blake who are each currently stuffing $100 bills down two strippers' g-strings.

"We're helping them pay their way through whatever they need," Blake yells at me.

A tall leggy brunette smile at me, an offer in her eyes but with a slight shake of my head, I turn her down.

I'm not interested in strippers. I'm not interested in any other woman except Liz Parker. But she's with Max Evans.

Max Evans, who the hell is he?! Just some actor while I'm a successful, powerful businessman in all areas of industry.
I'm the one who had Liz first. We had and still have great chemistry. She's the only girl I've ever date who can make me completely lose my temper and let go of the control I've mastered so well. We bring out the passion in each other. I haven't seen her do that with Max- granted I haven't seen them together as a couple for long periods of time, but it doesn't really matter.

What matters is that what Liz and I have is far more important and precious than what she and Max have. If that wasn't it, then why did she turn him down when he proposed and why is she still wearing my ring?

I've played the good friend role just to put a strain on their relationship well now, I think it's time I was a little more direct.

I never lose and I always take what's mine. Liz has feelings for me, she just needs a push and I'm going to give it to her tonight.

****

Liz's POV

Max, Rath and Kyle are playing some video game they're addicted to while I'm on the phone to Karen when the door bell rings. Seeing as the three game addicts aren't making a move to answer it, I finish off my call by the time I'm at the door.

I'm puzzled as to why Jules is at my door so late at night. I open the door prepared to ask him that but I never get the chance to.
"Get, your things, get Xan and let's go," he orders. I stunned still while he brushes past me and marches down the hall. After a moment, I rush after him utterly confused.

"Jules, what?-"

He comes to a halt right outside the living room and turns to me. I narrow my eyes at his appearance, his hair is disheveled, he looks frustrated but it's the eyes that get me. They're too stimulated, dilated. And he smells of tobacco.

"Are you drunk?" I ask.

"I had some to drink and it's made things really clear. I'm here to take you away."

Oh yeah, he's drunk.

Great. Fabulous. Fun-freaking-tastic.

"Jules, I'll call you a cab. You go home and sleep it off," I tell him firmly.

He grabs my wrist in return and suddenly there's heat in his voice and eyes. "We belong together Liz. You're mine. I love you and I'm taking you."

Can I not have some peace? Can I really not have some peace?!

I wrench my hand free from his. "You're taking me? I'm not some freaking prize Julian. I'm calling you a cab and you can talk to me when you're not stupid drunk."

"No." He grabs my arm again. "Liz, don't fight it. I know you feel the same way."

Damn it. He's drunk. When he's drunk, he's more stubborn than usual and he seems to think he's still in love with me or something.
Great. He's going to make a scene and Max, Rath and Kyle are here.
This is not good.

"Jules-"

I break off my when starts dragging me straight into the living room. Before I can stop him, we're there and Max, Rath and Kyle suddenly find us more interesting than their game. My eyes sweep over them and settle trained on Max. He takes in Julian, then his grip on my arm, then the panicked look on my face.

His eyes narrow for a second, his jaw clenched, he stands up. Heck, they're all standing up with anything but friendly expressions on their faces. While I'm touched that they would want to protect me, I know Julian isn't going to hurt me.

"Jules needs a cab home," I tell them.

If I can get him out of the house, this could be solved more calmly.

Jules screws up my plan by shaking his head stubbornly. He drops my arm and stands in front of me. "I've come for Liz and Xan. I'm taking them. They belong with me, not you."

I close my eyes briefly and brace myself for this. I step out from behind him and try to do some damage control.

****

Kyle's POV

When I came over tonight, I didn't expect to be involved in a face-off between two very capable guys but hey, life's full of surprises.

I watch as Max clenches and unclenches his fist.

"She belongs with me. Xan is my son. Liz is my girlfriend. You're just her friend. Deal with it," he spits out.

Sure he needed to say that and I've got no problem with it, but it's doing nothing to pacify this situation. Not that I'm all for walking away but this could get very ugly.

"Like hell I will," retorts Julian. He advances on Max and Max does the same but Liz steps between the two.

"Look guys, let's just calm down okay. Max?". She holds his gaze like they're having some kind of silent battle which she wins because he steps back.

Next she turns to Julian. "You need to go."

"I'm not going anywhere without you." The guy's stubborn and seems slightly drunk. I don't think this will be settled calmly.

"Jules, we're not together. I love Max, I'm with Max."

"You heard her, get out," Max adds.

Julian's eyes are fire when he snaps up at Max. They fizzle out when he looks at Liz.
"You're with him are you?". That pleasant frigid calm scares me.

He fires up at Max. "That's why we kissed last night is it? Because she's with you?".

Woah, woah, woah!. That's news.

Mine is not the only jaw that drops.

"Liz?". Max's questioning gaze is on her. She closes up her jaw, her lips fuse into a small frown and there's so much emotion in her eyes as she looks at him. Then it's gone. Like a flick of shutters, now there is only one emotion she's riding on now and it's anger.

"You asshole." She grabs Julian's arm and shoves him to face her.

I stand corrected, she riding on fury.

"For the record. We didn't kiss, you kissed me and I pushed you away. And I didn't tell Max because the kiss meant nothing, didn't last long enough to mean anything.
You were drunk- though it seems to be an excuse for you to act like a jerk nowadays. I didn't say anything because I felt sorry. If I'd known you were going to do this, I would have punched you there and then!".

Wow, I'm not under her wrath but she's scaring me.

Julian glances over at Max with a grin on his face. Did I miss something?

"See? See the passion she has. I bet she doesn't do this with you. Bet you've never seen her like this," he taunt.

I've never seen her this furious but why is he grinning happily about that?

Liz looks at him dumbfounded for a moment as if trying to figure out if he's lost his mind. "Seriously?!", she exclaims in disbelief.

Julian turns to her, all tender and sweet. "Liz, I lov-"

"Oh no buddy." Max makes a move to attack him but I hold him back.

Looks like Liz has a few issues with Jules herself and he might get caught in the cross-fire.

"Seriously? I thought we talked about this Jules," she tells him.

"Those are just words. They don't match with how you are around me," he responds.

"And how am I around you?" she asks.

I wanna know too.

He doesn't say anything, just looks at her and that sets her off even more.

"That's it! You and I are having it out." She grabs his arm, propelling his forward before taking over and drags him out of the room with superhuman strength. Max, Rath and I follow the sound of her cursing him along.

"Liz," Max begins but she shakes her head at him.

"Max, let me deal with him." She leaves no room for arguments when she open the nearest door and shoves Julian inside slamming it behind her.

"I should go in." Max makes a move to turn the knob but Rath stops him.

"Let them hash it out," he advises.

"I want to pound his face in," Max bites out.

"You might get the chance, but Liz'll be pissed at you if you interrupt. They have history, she needs to deal with it."

Thank you Rath. He's saving me from having to go all sensitive insightful.

"Okay," Max relents, "but we stay here in case things get out of hand."

And so that we can eavesdrop.

****

Liz's POV

"What the hell is wrong with you Jules?" I ask.

"What the hell is wring with me? What the hell is wrong with you being with him instead of me?" he retorts.

I tug at my hair in frustration. "We talked about this. I love him, chose him. You and me, just friends."

"I beg to differ."

I think my head is going to explode.

I take a deep steadying breath. "Where do you get that from Jules?"

"From the way you are with me. It's like nothing's changed."

"Of course some things haven't changed. We had a relationship, you can't have a good relationship without friendship, so we still have that, but the kissing and general non-platonic intimacy, we don't have."

"That's because you're not letting us," he argues.

How many ways do I have to say this?

"Jules, you proposed, I said no. I broke it off with you for Max. We went our separate but link ways. Now you come back into my life trying to solidify our friendship. I reiterate the fact that I'm with Max, that you and I are just friends and you seemingly accept that and yet we're here. Why?".

"Damnit because of you!".

I automatically duck at the bowl headed my way. I cringe at the sound it makes when it smashes against the wall. I look from the shards on the ground to Jules' shaken face.

"That could have hit me," I almost whisper.

"I threw it wide," he tells me.

Oh yeah, that makes it alright.

"You threw something at me, that could have hit me".

"I'm sorr-"

The door cracks open and Kyle's head pops through. "Everything okay?".

"Out!", I shout.

I wait for the door to close before speaking again but Jules beats me to it.

"I'm-"

I pick up the first thing in sight, a hardback book and chuck it at him. This time, he has to duck because I was aiming it at him.

"Hey!". Standing up tall, he holds out his arms in surrender. "I'm sorry."

"You're sorry?! Jules, you're obviously not okay with us just being friends. It sucks for you, I get that now. You were playing the friend card to try and break up Max and I. I don't understand, what is it didn't you understand about where I said- where you agreed that we stood?".

I am so tired of this drama. I just want it to end.

"I understood your words Liz, but they were all said and are still said while you're wearing my ring not Max's."

I stare at him blankly for a moment, then lift my hand to inspect the ring in a quite detached way. "This." I lift it up to him. "Is this what it's all about?".

He shrugs and looks at me as if it's completely obvious.

I march up to him.

"I wore this ring- on my right hand mind you- because you asked me to. Because it represents what we had and to me, it includes our friendship. I can wear this ring instead of Max's because it doesn't mean the same as his. Wearing his would be a symbol of the vows and promises we'd make to each other when we got married, which I'm not ready for. That's why I'm not wearing his.
I'm wearing yours because I look at it and remember you, because it's something from someone I care about. And if it's this STUPID ring that's causing all the drama, then there," I wrench it off my hand, grab his, force it on his palm, "take it back."

He stares at it, then slips it into his trouser pocket. "Liz I-"

The door bursts open and in storms Max flanked by Rath and Kyle. From the bloodthirsty look in his eyes, I have a feeling reason won't matter to him.

"Max, Julian is just leaving." I realise that I'm standing too close to Jules, so I take a step back for his safety.

I shoot him a look to play along but he shakes his head.

"No, I'm not," he responds.

Oh crap.

"Wanna take this outside?" Max asks.

"Guys really-"

"Liz, stay out of this," he warns.

"I'm fine right here," Jules replies.

They start circling each other like a pair of wild wolves.

"Let's go then."

"Kyle, Rath, do something. Stop them before this gets out of hand", I tell them.

"Liz, let them work it out," Rath responds.

"What?!".

Are they insane? They look about ready to kill each other.

"You and Julian have issues. He and Max have them too. I mean Jules tried it on with you more than once and Max has got you so that's issues enough for Jules," Kyle elaborates.

I flinch as Max's fist connects with Jules' jaw. "So, you want them to sort it out with fists?".

I can't believe this.

"Pretty much," shrugs Rath.

I roll my eyes giving up on them. I try to to talk sense into Max and Jules from a safe distance as they pummel each other.

"Guys seriously, STOP IT! You're being ridiculous!".

Great, raw male violence has me yelling on the sidelines like some feeble 1950s girl. I don't know who's winning, I don't care. I just want them to stop.

I look around the room frantically trying to spot anything I can use to separate them but I'm coming up empty. I wish I had a taser or tranq gun to take them both out with.

They crash onto and into a wooden table. Completely ignoring the fact that they just broke a table, they continue to pound into each other.

"Broken furniture," I point accusingly. "Now will you do something?", I ask Kyle.

"I'm on it." He rushes over and tries to break the two up, but it would easier with another pair of hands.

I wait on Rath expectantly.

"Doesn't being gay make me exempt from this type of thing?" he asks.

"Get in there," I order him.

It takes them a while, but they finally separate the two. Rath has Jules while Kyle has Max and they're both cursing each other.

Nice.

"Enough!", I shout between them. "If this ruckus wakes up Xan, both of you will pay," I threaten.

They are instantly silent. I should have used Xan a while ago.

"Okay. Kyle, take Max out of here to cool off while I talk to Jules," I tell him.

"What? So you're choosing him now?" Max accuses.

I pinch the bridge of my nose to cool my temper down.

"There is nothing I can say that won't be infected by the testosterone haze you're both stupidly blinded by, so I won't even try," I tell him.

"I'm not leaving you with him," he argues.

It takes Rath, Kyle and a few kisses from me to get him to leave.

Then I turn to Jules.

****

Julian's POV

"Feel better?" she asks.

Actually I do, but I don't think she'll be glad to hear that.

"I'm sorry about the table. I can replace it," I offer.

"The table doesn't matter Jules. What the hell was that about?".

She still doesn't know. It constantly surprises me that someone so smart can lack self-awareness and doesn't realise the effect she has on some people. It makes her all the more endearing.

"You," I reply.

"You were fighting our me? Why?- What was the need?".

To Liz, it's all black and white. She's with Max, she loves Max, her and I are just friends. That's it.

"You won't get it. It's a-"

"If you say it's a guy thing, I'll throw something at you again," she interrupts.

I start to smile but flinch at the pain on my bottom lip.

"You've sobered up," she comments.

"You're still pissed in the non-drunk sense of the word," I respond.

"Of course I am. This whole thing baffles me, how we got here. I don't do subtext- correction, we don't do subtext Jules. We never have. Last time I checked, we both said what we meant. When did that change?".

"When you didn't choose me," I reply sadly.

"Okay." She covers her face in her hands and guilt floods me.

"I'm sorry about his," I tell her.

Her fingers run through her hair. "Well you should be."

Apologies won't be accepted tonight. She's raw and I'm starting to get sore. We all need to sleep on it.

"I should go. I'll call a cab and wait for it outside," I tell her.

I can see her struggling for something to say and I can't help but try to smile again.

"You look awful, you've got a cut on your lip and your jaw's looking pretty bruised," she ruefully comments.

"You should see the other guy."

"You okay?" she asks.

No wonder I love her. Shit, I've gotta get over this.

"I've been better," I reply. "Your friends are going to treat me like an asshole when I'm making my way out."

"Yeah well, people who act like assholes get treated like assholes. Circle of life," she quips.

Can't argue with that.

"I get it now Liz. I'm gonna go."

It's hard to leave her but I do. She's in my heart and in my head but I'm not in hers that way. It's hard when you love someone who doesn't love you back.
It's not hard, it's damn near destructive.

****

TBC

AN: Hey all, I'm early with the posting this week due to busy weekend to come. First off just wanted to say prayers go out to all those affected by the London bombings. I'm so lucky I decided to come home last week otherwise, I would have been going into Kings Cross this morning.

Onto the fic,

Thanks for all the feedback and I know you're all frustrated with Liz right now, but there are only 6-7 parts to this story left, so since I'm all about happy endings, things should start working out soon and after this part, there will be more happy moments with our dreamers but...i'm not done with the angst yet

Thanks for voting on the poll, it's looking very strongly that my first update after finishing this fic or before if I get the time, will be You've Got To Be Kidding Me, followed by The Promise.

Oh and Desperately Wanting Lyrics belong to Better Than Ezra


PREVIOUSLY


"I should go. I'll call a cab and wait for it outside," I tell her.

I can see her struggling for something to say and I can't help but try to smile again.

"You look awful, you've got a cut on your lip and your jaw's looking pretty bruised," she ruefully comments.

"You should see the other guy."

"You okay?" she asks.

No wonder I love her. Shit, I've gotta get over this.

"I've been better," I reply. "Your friends are going to treat me like an asshole when I'm making my way out."

"Yeah well, people who act like assholes get treated like assholes. Circle of life," she quips.

Can't argue with that.

"I get it now Liz. I'm gonna go."

It's hard to leave her but I do. She's in my heart and in my head but I'm not in hers that way. It's hard when you love someone who doesn't love you back.
It's not hard, it's damn near destructive.

****

Nice to meet you anyway – part 27b

Liz's POV

I look around the room, it's not that trashed. There's the book I threw at Jules lying haphazardly on the floor. The bowl he threw against the wall, in pieces on the floor, the area around the broken table is a disaster though. Things have been tossed aside from where they belong, the table itself, splintered in two.

The room's not trashed, but it's a mess, just like a part of my life. What have I been trying to do? Run this relationship into the ground?

I close my eyes against reality, trying to hide in the dark, but I reluctantly open them again. I've done enough hiding of late.
I could have prevented this, maybe, I don't know. What I do know is that I at least partly through willing ignorance, contributed to what happened tonight.

I feel sick, disappointed and disgusted with myself and to top it all, now that I'm not hiding, there's a gaping hole in my chest that I used Julian to fill this week, but that I should fill with Max, but can't just yet.

"Well, this sucks". Speaking helps me feel better, I need to do a hell of a lot of talking with Max.

****

I go in search of him, but find Rath and Kyle first in the living room lounging around.

"Where is he?" I ask.

"Cooling off in the gym," Kyle replies.

I take a deep breath, blinking back tears. I don't even know why I'm wanting to cry. Oh yeah, because I'm seriously messed up in some way.

"Thanks for being here guys," I tell them.

"I haven't man-handled anyone like that in a long time. It was a rush," smiles Rath.

"Do you need us to stay?" asks Kyle.

"No, I can take it from here," I reply.

They scrutinize me just to make sure and then relent.

I hug them goodnight. "Oh and if Jules is still out there waiting for a cab, just walk past him, pretend he isn't there, don't beat him up or anything. Please."

"Fine," Kyle agrees with what I hope is mock reluctance.

****

The house seems deathly quiet after all of that, the gym's at the other side of the house, that's where I'll end up but I can't quite take myself there yet. Instead, I go to Xan's nursery to make sure he's okay. At least that's what I tell myself when honestly, it's to get my thoughts together.

He's asleep, completely dead to the world. He's so beautiful and precious.
Max and I made him.
Max and I. Max who is so much more than I could ask for and I- I roll my eyes, I don't even want to get into me right now. No, instead, I want just a bit of the peace and contentment Xan has, being around him, watching him sleep soothes me.

****

Taking a bracing breath, I open the door to the gym and step inside. My anxiety level rises when I see Max thrashing a punching bag bare-fisted and showing no mercy.

After going at it with Jules, I don't know where he's getting the energy from. Probably rage.

Okkay then, I'm kind of scared, I bite my lower lip nervously, so gentle steps for me then.

"Hi."

He doesn't look at me, just continues punching the bag. Harder this time. There's definitely rage and pain in each pounding, I can almost feel it.
I'm pretty sure he's pretending the bag's me.

Screw gentle steps. Dawdling won't make it any easier and until recently- scratch that, before Max, I wasn't one for sticking my head in the sand or shirking away from the obvious.

I cross over to the mat and hold both sides of the bag while he punches. Still he's not looking at me.

Ouch. But okay, I deserve it.

"I haven't been a very good girlfriend to you," I confess.

****

Max's POV

My fist is stopped from connecting with the bag at her words. My hands drop to my sides.

"What are you talking about?" I ask.

Her eyes shift from my face to my knuckles which are pretty raw.

"Max."

I know that tone and that look.

"I'll take care of it later," I tell her. I don't say anything else because anything I'd say would center around Julian and not in a nice way. Besides, she seem to want to talk first, so I let her.

"Sorry doesn't quite cut it for tonight- for the week." She pauses and has this strange look on her face as she looks at me.

I have no idea what she's talking about just yet.

"No wonder I can't marry you," she says after a moment of staring.

I blink carefully keeping my expression blank. "I'm gonna let you clear that up."

"It goes back to me not being a very good girlfriend..."

She's biting her bottom lip and fidgeting a lot, which clues me into the fact that she's more than nervous.

"...It goes back to me being completely and utterly screwed up and selfish and I know I'm making this about me, when I know there's the you factor and you and Jules- but it all comes back to me so-"

"Liz." I stop her for fear of her passing out from lack of oxygen.

"I know me spending time with Julian bothered you. You were pretty honest and vocal about it and I got it and I got it, I really did, but I didn't or wouldn't let myself."

I understand a little of what she's trying to say, but...

"You're not making much sense Liz."

She nods and running nervous fingers through her hair, starts pacing in front of me.
"I know it hurt you to see me go out with Jules- taking Xan along too- but..." she stops pacing and pierces me with her eyes, "...it was like, the part of me that would do something about that stepped aside. Bottom line Max, is I've been sticking my head in the sand to you and a lot of things lately because...it's been easier on me."

"What?".

I wasn't expecting this.

"Yeah," she nods shamefully. "It's not pretty. I've basically been selfish. I've made things not bother me by basically blocking them off. You, Jules, Mark."

Whoa, Mark now?!

"In this relationship..." oblivious to the turmoil I'm going through, she continues, "...you're in it like really committed. And I-I'm not ready to be that way which is why I'm not ready to marry you..."

Is this going to get any better?

"...and then Jules' is back in tow and suddenly, here's the life I had before you- not the intimate side, but he's sort of like a symbol of what I had before you."

I feel like she just backhanded me on the face a couple of times and I'm defenseless to stop it.

"I'm sorry if being with me bores you," I bite out.

"It's not that," she protests and I'm relieved that she does. "Look," she takes both my hands in hers, "can I just explain...please?".

I nod. Might as well hear it all.

To my surprised amusement, she sits down cross-legged on the mat and tugs me down with her.

I love her little quirks.

We sit opposite each other both cross-legged as if we're a couple of girlfriends about to gossip.

If only we were talking about meaningless gossip instead of this.

"So when Jules comes back, it's like, I have you and what we have together," she continues, "and I have him too. I have the independent lifestyle from before. Like the best of both worlds and I liked it...so I let him take up way too much of my time and refused to listen to you when you spoke of him having an ulterior motive. Basically because I was selfish and," she shrugs, "that's it."

I'm grateful for her candor, I really am. It's one of the things I've always loved about her but that doesn't mean it's easy to handle.

"You can't have one foot in and the other out Liz. You have to make a decision sometime," I tell her.

"I know. I know that and I'm asking you to be patient with me because no matter what I do that seems to be to the contrary, and I've been doing a lot lately, I do love you Max and I do want to marry you. Never doubt that."

I knew Liz would be a hard woman to love, but I do love her and I'm still mad and hurt.

"Do you have any feeling for him?".

That's what I want to know, because if she does, then- I don't want to think that far.

"I care about him," she replies. I can see the glittering honesty in her eyes and I'm more than relieved.

"You kissed him," I eye her coolly.

I can't quite get over that one yet.

"He kissed me and I pulled away the second it all clicked." she responds.

"You lied to me about it."

"I-I just didn't tell you," she finishes lamely.

"A lie by omission Liz, " I remind her.

"I knew you'd lose it if you found out. You were already wound up as it was and the whole thing was completely one-sided. I just wanted to prevent something like tonight."

She doesn't understand that there's no way she could have. This showdown was a long time coming.

****

Liz's POV

"I take part responsibility for this," I tell him.

"How?".

He's considering me with curious interest and I'm feeling slightly self-conscious but I continue. "When Jules' came to the reception, I ignored that instinctive feeling in my gut about why he was here. I thought 'let's think the best, don't jump to conclusions'."

If only I had, I could have saved a lot of grief.

"Jules', with me at least, is blunt about what he wants. So I figured, why would he have an ulterior motive? And I got mad at you because you were pushing it," I finish.

"I wonder why," he comments dryly.

He's being a lot more controlled than I would be in this situation.

"But then, if it was you and Tess, I'd've been the same," I tell him.

He raises a disbelieving eyebrow.

"Okay, if it all went down the way this week did with you and Tess, I'd probably be hurt and jealous and rashly break up with you," I admit.

"Do you think I should do that? Break up with you?". He asks the question with a quiet seriousness that has my throat closing in one itself.

My heart hurts. Oh God, I've screwed it up that much.

I bite down on my lip and will no tears to fall.

My mouth is as dry as a desert. "Uh...if..if that's want you want. I mean, I would blame you. It's just..."

I'd just hate myself forever and concoct way to win you back until you had me arrested for harassment.

He smiles that endearing half smile of his and I'm wondering what kind of vindictive bastard he is to take pleasure in doing this when he takes my hand. "You're work Parker, you know that?".

I eye him suspiciously but don't pull my hand away from him. "That's the second time you've said that to me in our relationship and I still don't know how to take it," I tell him.

He lifts a bruised hand and caresses my cheek. I'll be honest, I'm shocked. One minute I'm frantically trying to prepare myself for him breaking up with me and then next he's touching me in a non-break up way. My emotions are all over the place and if I don't find steady definitive ground somewhere I might just freak out on him.

I think he sees that because his smile gets wider.

I think he's getting some kind of sick pleasure from this.

"I'm not breaking up with you, Liz. You're work, I knew that coming into this and I love you for it."

"Okay."

I can accept that.

His eyes take on a dark hue, I've never seen before. "But never lie to me again, about something like the kiss."

"Fair enough," I nod. Inside, I'm jumping for joy. "Same goes for you, if it ever happens or something like that. I should tell you that um..."

Total honesty right? Plus I don't think this particular problem is over with yet.

"...Remember when I told you that I told Mark that I didn't share?" I ask.

His eyes bore into me. "Yeah."

"To elaborate, he suggested that me and him have an affair."

"Seriously?" he asks taken aback.

"Yep. Said it with an air of casualness too. I turned him down, obviously, but he left a 'we-can-still-be-friends' message on my cell which, now that I've lifted my head from the sand, I can tell you is one of those 'we-can-still-be-friends-but-I'm-holding-onto-hope-that-I-can-change-your-mind' messages. I think it'll be best to break off that friendship."

"Can't say I'm disappointed with your decision," he grins.

I'm happy to see him smile. He hasn't done a lot of that this week.

"About what happened tonight," I begin.

"Hey," he interrupts, "while you were in your denial land-"

"Hey!", I give him a good-natured shove.

"all week," he continues with a teasing smile which soon fades, "I got to watch the guy come between us, then he kisses you, then he has the balls to step into my home and disrespect me like that. You didn't expect me to do nothing did you?".

I see his point.

"I guess not."

"You may not have been consciously aware of what you were doing Liz, but he was. We needed to settle this."

****

Max's POV

"I should have known. Jules doesn't give up on a first attempt, plus, I should have seen the signs. When he left after my birthday party, he left me a red rose. That should have been a neon sign that he wasn't done."

"What's special about that?" I ask.

"You know me and my roses. Red is for love only, from people who know me. If he'd let me go, he would left me white roses or tulips or some other flower I like, but even then he knew what he was doing and I didn't- or chose not to see."

She's beating herself up over this.

"I think sorry is appropriate now," I tell her.

She looks at me blankly for a second till realisation dawns. "Oh. Sorry, for hurting you. For being a selfish bitch."

She surprises me into laughter. "Accepted."

"And Max, I am working on having both feet in on this."

I make the first move by intwining our fingers. She looks down and winces.

"We should get you checked out," she tells me.

"I'd rather you check me out," I grin wickedly. "You're not wearing a nurse's outfit, but I'm willing to overlook that."

She smiles and it reaches her eyes. "You're sick, you know that?".

I nod and wait expectantly.

She tries to frown but can't keep from smiling. "Tell me where it hurts and I'll kiss it and make it better."

My heart leaps in my chest. She'll always have that effect on me.

I point to one side of my cheek. "Here."

She leans over and kisses it.

I point to the other side. "Here."

She kisses that side too. Deciding to go for it, I point to my lips which she kisses very softly and slowly. "And here," I point to my chest.

She leans back considering me. "The t-shirt's gonna have to come off."

I eagerly whip it off. Grinning, she pins me in with her arms. Our eyes fuse, followed by our lips. I pull her down onto of me for the real healing to begin.

****

****

Max's POV

Xan's still got an hour or two of sleep before he wakes up and I'm making it count.

I grin as she moans out my name. "What?" I ask innocently while continuing to play with her breasts. She didn't honestly expect me to do nothing when she's walking around the kitchen naked under her robe.

"How am I supposed to cook us breakfast when you keep doing..." she trails off when my mouth latches onto her upturned lips.

I haven't stopped touching her since last night. I can't help it, after a week of harboring the fear of losing her in the back of my mind, I just need to touch her.

The sound of the door bell penetrates through the Liz induced haze.

"Go get the doors," she shoos me away, "while I finish up."

I turn her around for one deep kiss, before grinning like an idiot, I head to the door.

My smile vanishes when I find out who it it. If he want another round, I'd be more than happy to oblige.

I open the door but don't let him in.

"Julian."

"Max."

I wait expectantly.

"Can I come in? I promise not to cause any trouble."

I'm curious as to what he wants so with a frown, I let him into the hallway. "What do you want?".

****

Julian's POV

I knew this was going to be hard and I didn't expect him to make it easy for me, but if he could kill me with a look, I'd be long dead by now.

"I want to apologise for yesterday. I had no right to come into your home like that."

He just stares at me, waiting.

Okay.

"And I'm sorry for the week, for hitting on Liz. I couldn't let her go because...she's Liz. Just so you know, she was in it for the friendship."

"If I thought otherwise, I wouldn't have let you in let alone left you breathing without help," he tells me.

I'd do the same and worse.

"I just want to say..."

I woke up with a killer hangover, bruises not only on my body but on my ego and not pleased with my behaviour. Me and Max pounded on each other, that was a given, but I hurt Liz last night too and that's something I never wanted to do.

"...sorry. And that I really do understand that Liz is with you now."

It's excruciating to think about or accept, but it's the truth.

"Good."

"But, I do want to be friends with her...and maybe you eventually. Do you think that will be possible...after sometime?".

I'm offering out a hand of truce, of giving up Liz to him. It's been a while since I've been unsure of whether things will go my way or not.

****

Liz's POV

"Hey Max!, Everything's all set," I shout to him.

Curious as to where he is, I go in search of him and find him in the hallway with Julian. My steps slow as I take in the staring match between them. There are no clenched fists so I'd say that's a good sign.

Still...

I stand by Max's side just to make sure. "Max."
He's still looking at Jules. Wait...it looks like Jules is waiting for an answer. To what?

"My gut feel like steel punched through instead of your fist," he says.

What?

"My jaw feels like it's been worked over by a baseball bat," Jules responds.

There are small smiles on each of their faces, so I'm guessing everything's okay now.

"Liz."

"Reed." I fold my arms over my chest as his eyes settle on me.

"I apologised to Max and he accepted."

"That's good," I respond.

"Now, I'm apologising to you."

"Do you actually mean it this time or is it an act?".

I can't help it, I'm pissed off. He lied to me, he played me under the guise of friendship. Granted I let him in a way, but he shouldn't have done it in the first place.

"I mean it. I disrespected you with all this Liz. I disregarded your feelings when you told me repeatedly that we were over and that you were with Max. I made the decision for you and that's not how relationships of any kind work."

Don't I know it.

"I still want us to be friends, actual friends," he finishes.

I eye him warily. "I don't know Jules, you manipulated me. That's a serious dent in our trust friendship. I'm still mad at you and your Julian knows best attitude."

"I know and I deserve that. I just want a clue as to maybe, when you're less incensed at me, you can give me a second chance?".

If there's anything I've learnt from Max, it's the skill of giving people chances after they've screwed up but I want him to sweat it out a bit.

"Maybe...but that all depends on you. You have to be okay with us being just friends, take the time to- this sounds so self-centered- but take the time to get over me," I tell him.

"I will. It'll take more time than I thought, but when I'm okay, you'll know."

I nod my head in acceptance.

"I'm gonna head back to New York today. I just wanted to clear us up," he tells me.

I want to hug him, but I don't that'll help with his recovery, so instead, I smile and wish him a safe trip.

I watch him and Max shake hands.

"Take care of her Evans."

"I will do."

It's a touching moment for me. Two areas of my life that previously clashed have now made peace.

****

After Jules leaves, I can't help but feel bad for him.

"What's wrong?" asks Max.

"I just wish I had a twin or a clone- I don't know, I just wish he didn't have to be so hurt," I reply.

"It sucks to have your heart broke. I should know," he smiles softly.

"So should I," I tease back. Just as we're about to start eating our breakfast, the door bell rings again.

"What is it with visitors in the morning?!". I leave Max in the kitchen and go answer it.

Mark.

First Julian, now of course, it would be Mark.

What is it with today?

"Hey Liz."

"Mark, what are you doing here?" I ask.

No way am I letting him in.

"You haven't been returning my calls. I just wanted to make sure you were alright."

"I'm fine. And I didn't return your calls because I think it's best if we don't see each other, in the platonic sense anymore."

"You don't want to have an affair, that's fine. There's no reason to end our friendship."

Is he for real?

"See there is Mark. The more time we spend together, the more, no matter what you say right now, you'll think maybe, one day we might happen. We won't. Ever."

"I saw you in the papers with Julian Reed," he accuses.

"I'm sorry, you're going to argue me into an affair? Mark, I like you aside from your relationship lechery, you're a nice guy. I don't think it'll be healthy for your relationship with your girlfriend if we remained friends. I'd still be in your life, taking up your time and taking the place of where your girlfriend should be."

He stares at me unfazed by what I just said.

Okay, let's try it another way.

"I feel sorry for her, she's getting cheated. She deserves someone who won't go looking for a side-piece. I will not be the other woman in any capacity," I tell him resolutely.

"But-"

"I do believe you heard what the lady said." Max's dangerously leisurely drawl has me bracing. I really don't want anyone coming to blows again.

"I don't think we have anything let to say Mark. We'll be civil to each other when we cross paths, but that's it okay?" I tell him.

He glances at Max, then back to me. "Okay, I'll see you when I see you Liz." He acknowledges Max one last time and then turns to go on his way.

Shutting the door, I turn to my protective boyfriend. "Do we need to do a debriefing session on all of that? Him, Jules?".

"No." He wraps his arms around my waist, draws me close and kisses me until my lungs brun.

"I just want you."

I put his hand over my heart. "Then have me."

His lips crash onto mine, hard and breathtaking at first, then slow and gentle. Under the assault of his busy fingers, I lose my robe and find myself naked and pressed up against the wall.

"Max, the food," I murmur dizzily against his lips.

"We can warm it up," his responds with a voice thick with need.

My hand play with the waistband of his boxers, then go in and down. I smile in satisfaction at his hiss.

"I love you," he whispers. Before I can say it back, his tongue is making love to mine and I'm craving more of him and lost in that need. So lost that it takes me a moment to realise that my hands are pinned above my head.

"Max." I struggle trying to break free. He silences me with a rough kiss.

"No. Let me have you."

Under the power of his eyes, I can't refuse him.

The back of my head hits the wall as a vicious orgasm spears through me at the workings of his tongue.

"Max," I gasp out when his fingers work me towards the edge again.

He smoothers my cries with is mouth.

"This is just the beginning Liz," he promises in a hot liquid voice, "You're mine. All of you. I will have all of you."

His attacks are relentlessly maddening and mind-blowingly satisfying. There against the all, I let him take me. I let him have me until my legs can't support me and even after that, he holds me up.
He steadies me and just when I have my breath back and vision steady, he plunges into me, sending me spiraling into the blissful abyss until I'm drenched and scented with him, only him.

****

Max's POV

This year was spectacular for me. After sorting out the Julian and Mark situations, Liz and I had a week of peace before I went off to finish shooting. After that, life was amazing. I was working on a production project, Liz was juggling writing for Orange Sky, the book with Karen and being a mother to Xan. It was a bit of a trial for her at first, but together, we made it work.

We spent Christmas in Roswell, both of our families were together and I got a chance to see where Liz grew up. It was a definitely a moment for me. We even got a call from Julian wishing us a Merry Christmas. He and Liz have been talking on the phone. She let him make the first step when he was ready and I'm pretty sure that they both know where they stand with each other now.
It bothered me a bit at first, but Julian talked to me over the phone, which was weird, but we cleared everything up.

With the fame and fortune I had before I met Liz, I didn't think life could get any better for me, but it has. The only thing that would top it all, is if Liz wold marry me. My mum and Les wanted to bring it up over Christmas, but I held them back. I didn't want Liz to feel pressured or ganged up on. So I brought it up at New Years.


"Your mother and sister and my parents asked me the same thing over Christmas," she told me.

"Damnit it, I told them not to".

"It's okay," she smiled, "they were just curious and it's understandable. We're good right now and there doesn't seem to be any outward reason as to why I shouldn't marry you. I don't know what else to tell you Max, I'm just not ready yet."

"Is there anything I can do?", I asked.

"I told you. It's not you, it's me. And I know I'm pushing you, but I still feel-"

"Trapped? Boxed in?" I supplied.

She could have started an argument at that, but she merely lifted my hand and kissed it. "Not ready to be the wife yet."

"I love how you flinch at the word wife," I commented.

"It's not that I hate it, it's just, the word means a lot...of commitment and, just a lot more than what we are just now. I'm trying to get to that place where I can be okay with being your wife as fast as I can."

I kissed her, a pact, a promise. "I'll be waiting."


She isn't ready and I'm okay with that, I am, but it still hurts a bit because it feels like she's rejecting me again.

****

Liz's POV

"Hey Liz."

It's Christy, my official agent ever since the Alter-ego deal.

"Hey Christy, what's up?", I ask.

"You heard of a band called Better Than Ezra?".

"Yeah...I think so. We used some of their music for the show. They're pretty good. Why?".

"They've been in the background, underground but have a huge following. Now they're coming out, so to speak. They want you to do their music video."

My jaw drops. "You're kidding".

"Nope. I got a call this morning. Early. They've got Jake Gyllenhal, now they want you. What do you think?".

What do I think? I think wow.

"Um..."

"You should be getting the song and video premise delivered soon. If you like it, we can setup a meet and iron out any kinks."

"Um okay."

I hang up the phone in a daze. Someone wants me in their music video? I wonder why.
To work next to Jake Gyllenhal? He's a good-looking guy, not to mention talented actor. I've never done a music video before, it would be a challenge and fun.
Why not? As long as the song's good, I'll do it.

****

Three hours later, I slide the c.d. in and press play. I'm captured by the intro chords instantly. And the lyrics.

Past the road to your house
That you never called home
Where they turned out the lights
Though they say you'll never know

I remember running through the wet grass
Falling a step behind
Both of us never tiring
Desperately Wanting

When they pumped out your guts
Filled you full of those pills
You were never quite right
Deserving all the chills

They say the worst is over
Kicked it over and ran
Then they ask what went wrong
When they turn you on again
They turn you on again.

I remember running through the wet grass
Falling a step behind
Both of us never tiring
Desperately Wanting

Kick them right in the face
Make them wish they weren't born
And if they bring up your name
Well they'll say you won the war.
Baby burst in the world
Never given a chance
Then they ask what went wrong
When you never had it right

Oh, the letters have dropped off
Though they say you got them all
I finally figured out some things you'll never know.
Take back your life and let me inside
We'll find the door if you care to anymore.

I remember running through the wet grass
Falling a step behind
Both of us never tiring
Desperately Wanting.



I love the song. I'd do it on that alone, but I flick through the video premise and it's good but there's one little problem, it calls for quite a few kissing scenes and not just any kisses, ones with the passion and desperateness of the lyrics. It basically calls for me to make out with Jake Gyllenhal. Make out with another guy who's not my boyfriend. It would be only acting of course but still.

I really want to do this, but can I get comfortable with the kissing? And it's not just me, it's Max. He does scenes like this and more in his films, that's his thing, we both accept that. So far, it hasn't been my thing. I never thought it would be.

I listen to the song again. And again.

Okay, so I really want to do this. I just have to break it to Max. I want him to be okay with me doing this.

****

TBC

AN: Hey all, the next part is up. This week's been kind of busy and I'm on my way out at the moment, so thought I'd do a quick post of this part.
Thanks for the feedback.
Thanks for voting.
Here's my beautiful award and the next update.



PREVIOUSLY


Liz's POV

I love the song. I'd do it on that alone, but I flick through the video premise and it's good but there's one little problem, it calls for quite a few kissing scenes and not just any kisses, ones with the passion and desperateness of the lyrics. It basically calls for me to make out with Jake Gyllenhal. Make out with another guy who's not my boyfriend. It would be only acting of course but still.

I really want to do this, but can I get comfortable with the kissing? And it's not just me, it's Max. He does scenes like this and more in his films, that's his thing, we both accept that. So far, it hasn't been my thing. I never thought it would be.

I listen to the song again. And again.

Okay, so I really want to do this. I just have to break it to Max. I want him to be okay with me doing this.

****

Nice to meet you anyway - part 28a

Max's POV

I've know since I came home that there's something my darling Liz wants to tell me, but for some reason, she's putting it off. If it was bad, breaking my heart news, she would have given a sledge hammer type delivery and I'm comforted by that. That's why I'm letting her tell me in her own time.

Which she decides is over dinner.

"So Max," she begins while coaxing food into Xan's mouth. I swear ever since the kid got out his first word, aside from 'mama' and 'dada', 'no' seem to be his next favourite word. I think he does it purposefully for fun though because right now, he's smiling and he presses his little lips shut.

"So Liz," I respond conversationally.

"I got this offer today that I'm really excited about and I want you to be okay with it."

Okay.

"What is it?" I ask.

"It's to be in a Better Than Ezra- amazing band- music video."

"That's great, honey."

That sounds okay but there must be more coming.

"Yeah...Jake Gyllenhal's my co-star."

Right.

"And you want me to be okay with that because..."

"Because I have to make out with him for some scenes," she rushes it out.

"Uh huh."

Liz making out with another guy. Huh.

"Are you okay?" she asks eyeing my carefully.

I'm working through it, processing the emotions and initial rash reactions.

"Are you asking for my permission?"

She snorts incredulously. "You're not the boss of me, but I want you to be fine with it and not all awkward."

So this is what she had to go through when accepting me completely. With Tess, it never occurred to me to be bothered that she had intimate scenes with other men, we both did the job. But this kind of of thing hasn't been a part of Liz's job until now and it would be hypocritical of me to be upset with her when I do more than have a few on-screen kisses sometimes.

"Jake's a nice guy," I finally respond.

Translation: he's not the type to scam on someonelse's girlfriend.

"I forgot, he's one of your people isn't he?" she teases.

"I haven't done anything with him, but I've met him at a few after-premiere parties," I reply.

"I'm so glad you approve." Her sarcasm brings a smile to my face.

I trust her.

"I'm okay with it," I tell her.

She squeals, Maria-style. "Good because I really want to do it. And don't worry, even though I get to make-out with a very hot nice guy, with cute dimples and drowning ocean blue eyes, be secure in the knowledge that I come home to you."

"Ditto."

Her eyes twinkle. "You make out with cute dimpled faced, blue eyed guys too?". She abruptly stands up and melodramatically presses her hand to her forehead out of mock despair. "Why Max, I'm shocked. You swing the other way too? I'm heart broken."

"Funny."

"Really," the corners of her mouth lift upwards, "It's so overwhelming."

"Yeah, yeah." I tug her down to my lap. "I love you."

Her lips brush and linger against mine. "I love you too."

****

Liz's POV

The music video shoot goes absolutely amazingly well. MTV Making The Video and MTV Diary Of...Jake Gyllenhal were there for the band and for Jake because he's been a very busy boy and has a much anticipated film coming out soon- so there were cameras everywhere over the course of the two days.

I got to meet the band, as well as Jake beforehand. Jake and I got to spend a few hours together, just to get comfortable with each other, I think he heard that this was a first for me, so he wanted to put me as much at ease as possible. Max was right, he is a nice guy, with a quiet, quirky sense of humour. We hit it off which was good because it made me more relaxed.

We had to do a few scenes over again during the first day because I was a little off. I had to get used to the music playing in the background, movements and direction. I like being behind the camera a lot more, I've decided, but Jake was great, so was the director and Ava was there with Xan, so I got better as the day went along.

We ended up having a lot of fun with it, Jake and I would goof around a lot because our characters are supposed to be best-friends in love with each other, so we totally went with it. Max visited on the second day which was a nice surprise.

"I thought I'd make a thoughtful gesture to rack up those boyfriend points," he smirked.

"Oh and I thought as well as that, it was a chance for you to check up on me and broadcast to whoever needs to hear that my boyfriend, the talented and gorgeous Max Evans is on set, so hands-off," I teased.

"Well," busted, he sheepishly shrugged. "There's that too."

I was touched. "Oh Max." I kissed him until I was dizzy and then had to rush off back onset.

The kissing scenes with Jake after initial awkwardness went fine, especially after we agreed to a no tongue rule. I can tell you, it was an experience to make-out with someone with people watching and the director telling you to tilt your head more to the side or slide your hand lower.
Jake and I cracked up a few times when we were supposed to be getting really intense. All in all, I can't say kissing him was a painful experience, it was a fun thing and I got to meet and spend time with new and interesting people.

****

When the video premiers on TRL, Maria has us all over for the viewing. I didn't think it was a big deal to go that far, not to mention how weird it would be watching myself making out with someonelse with my friends there. I got to see each scene after we shot it, but this would be the first time I'd be seeing the video in it's entirety, so I was nervous. But Maria was having none of it.

So with Xan in his playpen with toys, we all settle down with food and drink in the monster screening room her and Michael have. We pay attention to the stuff that's interesting to us and chat around the boring stuff. I almost forget about it until Suchin Pak presents it.

"...Now, we're going to have the guys on the show next week as well as star of Dazed, Jake Gyllenhal who took time off his schedule to do the video..." I zone out as she continues to talk and zone back in when the video starts. Even though I'm holding my breath, I still smile at the introductory chords. I really love this song and suddenly, I'm excited to see what it's like.

The premise of the video, is that Jake and I are best-friends with a will-they-won't-they chemistry. I'm pretty messed up and have an overbearing family and Jake's character keeps me grounded. My parents' send me away, we're separated for years, but we write and then years later, we meet up again, past the road to my house, in the field we used to escape to in our youth and have a major make-up session.

As I watch it, I have to say, it's really good. Jake and I have great on-screen chemistry especially with the song. I got to wear lots of different outfits for the shoot. I have a few favourites, like during my 'confused' state, I'm all painted up with make-up wearing tight leather pants and a strappy red top, I show up at Jake's at night a complete mess. I cry in his arms, it's so cute.

Then there's the scene where I ran over to his house in a thin-strapped white top, hot pants and lime green heels. My hair is in these cute curls. Jake opens the door and I leap into his arms. He's looking pretty good too; his younger version is all clean cut, but for the older version, he had to leave a shadow, to look rough and kind of rugged, which also looked pretty hot.

Then there's the other scene, where we're goofing around in his room and all I'm wearing is his white shirt and black tie with a hat, doing this mock-dance show stint, before tackling him on the bed, where we proceed to make out. I feel myself blushing because I feel like I'm doing a weird voyeuristic thing but I must say, the kiss along with the music is pretty hot, even with no tongue.

It's really cool to see how all the scenes link up, I got to see some of the band's scenes on-set but to see them cut with mine and Jake's, it's...wow.
The last part is one of my favourite scenes, Jake and I - our older versions- meet up in the field and I'm wearing this stylish camel blend fitted suit. We see each other, our gazes lock as flashbacks of our past bombard the screen, then I'm walking and he's walking, then we're both running and end up in each other's arms- well my legs around around his waist and arms around his neck. It's all pretty hot, when he shoves off my jacket while our lips are attached to each other. It's all pretty hot but tasteful. All in all, they kept four kissing scenes of the eight that we did, so it's the almost kissing parts that cause me to catch my breath. We gave these characters spark and I'm proud of it.

I'm smiling at the end, I liked it. I look around at everyone whose eyes too had been glued to the screen.

"Well, what did you think?" I ask, the nerves suddenly coming back.

"I think, I need a cigarette," replies Kyle.

"You don't smoke," Karen reminds him.

"I need to take it up after watching that. Either that or get laid tonight 'cause that was hot," he adds.

I grin.

"Hey, that's my girlfriend you're talking about Valenti," Max warns.

"Sorry man," Jesse adds, "but it had to be said."

"You and Jake," Maria begins," you conveyed sizzling chemistry and passion in under four minutes. My hat's off to you."

"Thanks 'Ria," I beam. It means a lot coming from her, acting isn't really my world.

I turn to the person sat beside me. I want to know what he thought. "Max?".

He looks at me for a moment and I'm holding my breath. "I think you did good," he smiles. "Question, did you get to keep some of those outfits?".

I shot him a withering look, topped off with a dry smile. "Mind out of the gutter."

"Aww, you're no fun." He leans down and catches my lips with his and the next thing I know, Michael's telling us to get a room before we get R rated.

Blushing I pull back from Max. The burning in his eyes has me itching to get him home. "Sorry guys."

"No problem, in fact, after seeing that, you all need to go and leave us newlyweds to it," Maria responds.

" 'Ria, you've been married for nearly a year now," I remind her.

"What's your point?" she grins.

Pulling Max up with me, I have to laugh. They're so happy together.

Lately, I've had this feeling of urgency to get over my fear of marrying Max because that's what it is now, fear and something else. Whatever it is, I want to figure it out fast because I want to be married to him.
Michael and Maria have argued and fought. They've had misunderstandings and dealt with the strain of their careers in marriage and they've got through it because above the passion, is love and I'm reaching the point of desperation with wanting all that Max and I have in marriage. And I know it's me who has to make the next next, but I can't bring myself to do it.

A month ago, I tried out this technique, where I'd try on the ring to see if I felt any better. The first time, I had the same reaction as before; chest-tightened, found it hard to breathe, my fingers were shaking.
I took it off and tried again the next day. After a week, I stopped because I didn't think weaning myself off panic and hyperventilating is the best way to enter into marriage.

****

Max's POV

"You really okay?" she asks me.

The drive home was fine. We talked, joked, listened to music, but I know that now we're alone, in private, she just wants to make sure.

"I'll admit, it stung to watch you kiss someone else with that much...enthusiasm. I understand that it's all acting and stuff, but if felt weird at first, but I'm okay now," I tell her honestly.

"Good."

"It makes me love you ever more," I continue, "because I know falling for someone who sometimes does intimate scenes with other women wasn't what you had in mind."

"Life's funny like that," she shrugs.

"Daddy play!". Xan shakes his toy at me. "Daddy play!".

I grin as I kneel down into his play pen and play air-plane with him. "Speaking of play," I say to Liz, "that hot pant number with the heels and the shirt and tie one you wore?".

"Uh huh."

"On my fantasy list," I tell her.

"Done."

"Really?". I'm surprised, I didn't think she'd give in that fast. I decide to go for gold. "With the hot one, after I've got you naked, you have to keep the stilettos on while we-"

"In your dreams Evans," she shoots me down.

"You betcha," I grin. At least I gave it a shot.

****

Liz's POV

"I think that's about it for today. A day or two and we'll be done, so I'll leave you before Max gets home."

"Thanks Karen," I tell her.

We're just putting the finishing touch to the book, what started out as an overall summary has turned into a piece that I'm proud of.

"So does tomorrow around two sound good?" she asks as we make our way to the door.

"Max has a meeting at two and I'm picking up Xan at midday, so that's perfect."

I open the door and come face to face with Max...and Kyle.

Great, I'm seeing my plans go down the drain.

"Hey," I greet him, " we having company tonight?".

****

Max's POV

I take in the red v-neck top and white hot pants...and matching red stiletto heels.

Her question of whether we're having company tonight penetrates through my fog of ways to enjoy her.

Company?

"Not anymore," I reply. "Kyle, go home."

His jaw drops, but I'm sure if he was in my position, he would do the same. "You're ditching me for a woman? Where's the friendship man?".

I can't take my eyes off her. "Somewhere," I respond vaguely.

****

Liz's POV

The intensity of his stare has my stomach tying in knots. I guess this was a very good idea. I let him think I'd forgotten all about his fantasy request, I wanted it to be a surprise and I can tell he's very surprised.

"Kyle, take a lady out for a drink?" Karen asks.

I hold back laughter as the jaw he just picked off the floor, drops back open again. Kyle's had a crush on Karen since they officially met a few months back, but hasn't had the nerve to ask her out. Karen likes him 'for fun' but she let him sweat it out a bit and wanted to concentrate on the novel.
But seeing as that's nearly done...

"Sure," he manages after a few soundless seconds, "um...um"

She laughs amused, gives me a quick hug and takes his arm. "Let's go."

I can tell who'll wear the pants in whatever they'll end up being.

Meanwhile, I've got a makes-you-weak-in-the-knees devastatingly gorgeous man still devouring me with his eyes.

"You gonna come in or you just going to stare at me all night?" I ask.

"Oh-I-um, I.." He steps in. I close the door behind him with an amused smile. It's been a while since I've made him, stammer and fall back into his shy-boy routine.

This is fun.

****