Roswell Fanatics

Note: There are two more updates before this one (so you don't miss them )

*hugs*
Jo

EIGHTY-ONE

"I'm so sorry," was the first thing Max said to me, before I even had my eyes fully open. "I pushed you too far. I should have noticed how your energy... God... I'm so sorry."

I tiredly blinked my eyes and tried to focus on his face looking down at me.

"What happened?" I mumbled tiredly, the letters rasping against my dry throat.

"I fucked up," he said tensely, no confusion to the magnitude of his self-hate as disgust made the corners of his mouth tremble in a grimace and anger blotched his cheeks red - in stark contrast with the whiteness of his face.

With a moan, my eyes fell shut. My whole body ached, but mostly my head. My head was pounding. As if someone had hit me over it with a considerably hard object.

"If you'll let me, I'll remove that for you," Max said. His words made no sense and through the fog of my headache I realized that he wasn't touching me. He felt really far away. I groaned while pushing myself up on my elbows, attempting to get closer to him.

At least my movement made him touch me, if only to gently pushed me back down, right as I was starting to feel dizzy. "No. Stay down."

I wet my lips. Slowly. Distractedly. Why was everything so dimmed? So unreachable? "What are you talking about, Max?"

I was too tired to even attempt to search through his thoughts. But I had the strongest horrible feeling that he was blocking himself from me.

"I won't heal you without your permission."

I made a feeble attempt at deciphering the detachment in his voice, before resigning with a tired sigh. "Don't be silly." What was he on about now? "When have you ever needed my permission?"

"I keep putting you in danger. I can't believe I just did that. I was careless - with you. That's... I can't even..." The sound level of his voice was rising and I felt it throb inhospitably through my overwhelming headache.

With my eyes closed, I used the little energy I had to blindly fold my arms around his neck and pull his talking mouth to mine.

"Shut up," I commanded weakly against his lips and used my lips to work around his resistance. I knew that he had nothing against kissing me. He just thought he didn't have the right to, all of the sudden.

He pulled back before we, in my opinion, were anywhere close to done, causing me to moan with a mixture of dissatisfaction and frustration, and rested his forehead against mine.

"I should have noticed too, you know," I said, the memory of the minutes just before I had passed out in front of everyone slowly coming back to me. "That I was getting tired."

He pulled back, breaking the skin contact between our foreheads, and my arms lost their grip on his neck. "But you weren't the one coming up with more and more stuff to do."

A cold shiver raced through me at his physical distance, emphasizing our emotional and mental separation. Through the dazed haze of my mind, only one thing had the power to make its way clearly through. Like a bright beacon in the night.

I had to, quickly, pull him out of his darkness.

I took a deep mental sigh in preparation, gathering my strength to focus on reaching him. My head throbbed painfully, my eyelids blinking slowly, while I give him a soft half-smile and tried to get him to see my point of view. "You were having fun. I loved how much fun you were having."

Obviously, my means of comfort fell flat as Max said darkly, "I can't have fun at the expense of your health."

I took a deep breath, my attempted smile dying on my lips. "Of course not. But you would have stopped if you had noticed, right?"

He dipped his head forward, the hair against his forehead casting a shadow down his face, down his pulled down eyebrows as he mumbled lowly, "I should have noticed."

With him back within my reach, I lifted a tired hand and threaded fingers through his fringe. His hair was getting long. He needed a haircut. "You're not Superman, Max."

Max looked up at me, his eyes the darkest shade of disappointment. Disappointment with himself.

"I still should have noticed," he insisted stubbornly, as if my health and well-being was resting on his shoulders. Just like he had said even before we had really known each other; that I was 'his responsibility'. I was starting to understand how much he actually believed that.

And having to look out for another person's life was a very heavy task to carry. Especially for a 16-year-old.

I sighed, the painful presence of my headache winning out over my patience. "Can you please heal me now? My head is killing me."

His hand was trembling slightly as he wordlessly placed it against my forehead. He was upset. Really really upset.

The relief was immediate and felt amazing.

I inhaled deeply and closed my eyes, reveling in the sensation of floating and easy breathing, "You do great work, Evans."

He pulled his hand away, making me look up at him at the sudden chillness. "Liz, this is serious."

I slowly got up from my horizontal position. There was no risk of me being dizzy this time. Not with Max's energy thrumming through my veins. I took in the hunch of his shoulders, how he hung with his head, the shadows of worry in his eyes as he moved them between my face and his hands. His whole demeanor had changed. His self-loathing had melted into chilling fear.

"I know, Max," I said gently. "Calm down."

He leaned forward, trailing a hand down the front of my throat, down over my heart, pressing his hand to the top of my breast for a second, a distant look in his eyes as they followed his hand's journey. "You could have died."

I caught his hand, lifted it from my chest and pressed my lips to his palm. "But I didn't. Not with you there."

He frowned, annoyed, "That's not-"

Looking at him sternly, being infected with his irritation, my voice was sharp as I interrupted him, "How do you expect me to go into battle with you, when I haven't tried my limits? At least now we have some idea of how much my body can handle. At least at this stage of my...development. And we know now that the fatigue seems to come on quickly, which is why we missed it. I just have to be a bit more in tune with it. We got a bit carried away, sure, but wasn't it better for it to happen in our living room than in front of Command?"

I couldn't hear his thoughts, couldn't hear his reasoning, but I could see them working through his mind, his gaze tracing my features, his mouth set into a stubborn line.

"Trust me, Max."

He frowned. "I trust you."

I searched his face. "Then trust yourself."

That probably hit straight home, because he didn't give me a response to that. His jaw tightened before he dropped his eyes to the bed sheet.

God, you're so stubborn, I told him, knowing that he could hear me.

His jaw clenched.

Guiding his hand back down to my chest, I held it gently in my hand and my voice was equally gentle as I leaned forward, closing the distance between us. "I think, for this to work, that we have to be equal. Not in power, but in our trust in our power. We have to be equal in our belief in each other, in ourselves."

"I believe in you," he told me, slightly defensively, worried that he had failed in proving that to me.

I smiled at him. "There's no doubt about that." I shook my head slowly, "But you don't believe in yourself."

I could see that he wasn't really agreeing with me, but he didn't voice his objection, instead letting me speak, "It feels as if the connection is trying to guide us, but in the end we have to be the ones to carry things through." I looked down at his hand in mine. The hand that could heal. And I was saddened, for not the first time, about his blindness to his own capabilities.

"You have to let go of your control, Max." I kept my eyes on his hand. It was difficult to be this honest with him. I didn't want to hurt him, didn't want to boss him around or make it sound as if I knew better than him. Because I didn't. We were both equally lost regarding facts about this connection. "So do I. Do you really think that I would have lasted that long today if we hadn't been having fun?"

He looked up at the same time as I did and I rose a bit in my seat, coming to my knees, resting my behind on my heels. "I don't think I should have been able to do all of that. Not my first time around. How long were we at it? An hour? An hour and a half? But we were playing around with it, letting go of the control. Believing in us, in the connection, in our strengths."

Light flickered in his eyes and I could see him swallowing his pride, second-guessing if he had, indeed, reacted badly to this whole thing. Looked at it in the wrong way. If there even was a right or wrong in these situations.

"Outside of making love to you," he whispered, his eyes burning as they traced the blush that colored my cheeks. "I've never felt more alive than I did today." His eyes were deadly serious as he looked at my mouth. "But then you sank to the floor, and I-"

I put my arms around his neck and pressed my forehead against the side of his warm neck. "I'm right here."

His arms went around my back and my hold on him tightened at how his arms quivered in their embrace.

"I can't lose you," he whispered. "And I know that in order for us to be able to fully live, to be free, we have to fight them. I'll have to put you out there. That scares me...so much. Sometimes I can hardly breathe. I don't know how to deal with all of that..."

"Don't you think I feel the same?" I asked him, placing small kisses in the curve between his neck and his shoulder, in the space not covered by his shirt. "I don't want you there either. I'm afraid of what you might turn into when you see them, knowing what they have done to us-"

"To you," he interrupted tightly. "I don't care about what they did to me. They're a part of me. They're my race. I've known of the laws my whole life and, being fully informed of the consequences of breaking those laws, I still broke them. You, on the other hand, had no idea what you were getting yourself into. You had no choice. You never had a choice. That's what I hate most about all of this. That you were punished - relentlessly - even when you had done absolutely nothing wrong. You were punished when you haven't even been given a choice. That's sick. That makes me want to do...fucking terrible things to them."

I had slowly crawled into his lap during his confessions. "They wronged you too. Even if you broke their laws, those laws are not the truth. They're made up by power-hungry heartless control freaks. Just because they were created by a council doesn't mean that they are right. They have no right to treat you that way."

I pulled back, my wrists resting against his neck, my hands lightly interlaced behind his head and I warmed from top to toe from his intense gaze locked on my face. I had his full attention. Even though his full attention seemed distracted by the closeness of my lips to his, considering that his gaze kept moving between my eyes and my mouth.

I was, myself, momentarily distracted by the thickness of his long eyelashes, by the curve of his mouth, by the enigmatic color of his eyes, before I forced myself back to the conversation with a slow controlled blink of my eyes.

"I'm afraid that you will only fight for me out there. And I will fight for you. That doesn't unite us. That doesn't make us help each other. That puts us on our own separate paths, with separate agendas. We have to hold them accountable for what they've done to us, to my mother, to previous gaeas, to humans who've had their minds involuntarily erased to not reveal alien secrets, and all other terrible things they might have exposed my race to. But we also have to hold them accountable for what they might have done to their own race. Because even if I don't know much about your history, I know that you have a whole center for wiping the memories of your own when you 'get out of line' and that's just horrible."

He opened his mouth to speak, but I had to get my final two cents in, "This is personal, but we can't make it too personal. It will make us vulnerable."

He closed his mouth again and just stared at me, the hint of a smile on his lips.

"What?" I whispered, tempted to smile along with him.

"We should make you our new president or something," he said, grinning now.

I raised an eyebrow. "President of Aliens?"

"And I would be First Gentleman," Max announced simply.

I laughed. His ability to completely flip a serious situation to a light one still impressed me. "I think you're getting ahead of yourself now, Max. Do you have any comprehension of the commitments the spouse of a President would have to handle? There's only so far your pancakes will take you."

"Ha. Ha," he quipped sarcastically.

"Knock knock," Isabel said from the door, making us both turn our heads in her direction. "Are we interrupting?"

"No, you're fine," I answered, scooting off Max's lap and silently telling him, Now, stop blocking me.

He snapped his eyes towards mine in amused surprise, most likely as a result of my authoritative tone, and answered, Yes, Madam President.

I was about to roll my eyes at him when his thoughts and feelings rushed through the bond and I swayed in my spot. It was amazing that the unblocking of the bond continued to have that effect on me. That I never quite got used to the depth and richness of his essence.

"Are you okay, Liz?" Isabel questioned and I noticed Alex standing behind Isabel in the doorway. "You got us a bit worried there."

Alex stepped into the room, pausing next to Isabel. "A bit?" He snorted. "You should have seen how Max reacted. He- ooof." Isabel had just jabbed him in the stomach with her elbow.

But I had already felt Max's reminiscent feelings of the incident, the exact things he had been blocking from me. I caught glimpses of my unconscious body on the floor, of Max pushing all his feelings to the side to focus on transferring energy into my lifeless body. With a shiver in response to his dark memory I reached out and grabbed his hand, pressing it tightly against mine as his panic and fear echoed through me.

"I'm okay," I said, trying to keep my voice from shaking at Max's feelings thrumming through the bond. "I got a bit carried away."

"Yeah," Isabel frowned. "What was that?"

"That was quite the show," Alex added and took a deliberate step away from Isabel, in case she felt like 'silencing' him again. To the causal observer, Isabel didn't acknowledge Alex's antics, but I caught the small smile in the corner of her lips and the subtle flicker with her eyes in his direction.

"We're not sure," Max replied, interrupting my quiet observation of Isabel and Alex, "but it seems as if Liz has fully tapped into the connection."

Isabel raised a perfectly shaped eyebrow in interest. "Really? Does this mean that we should call for a meeting?"

I met Alex's eyes and I could feel his worry. He was having a hard time controlling his emotions again, letting them seep out from his empathic ability and affect the people around him.

Isabel noticed too, since she turned to Alex and, to my surprise, briefly took his hand. "She'll be fine, Alex. Liz can do this." She looked away from him, releasing his hand and looked at me. "Right?"

Alex was staring at Isabel, probably just as surprised as I was at Isabel's method of comforting him. But Isabel was back to being untouchable, with her eyes fixed on Max and I, her facial expressions neutral and slightly expectant as she waited for our answer.

"I'm working on it," I replied, not wanting to disappoint her.

I knew that I could do it, especially if Max was in it along with me. But I also knew that I still needed time.

And you're getting as much time as you need, Max told me.

But maybe we should talk to your father still, I mused. He has the right to know.

I can do it, you don't have-

You can't protect me from these things forever, Max. I need to become a part of it. Attending those meetings is the least scary part of our future.

"Care to share?" Isabel asked, interrupting our mental conversation with a bemused smirk.

"Liz wants us to have a meeting," Max said, giving me a grumpy look.

I wouldn't necessarily use the word 'want', but...

"Does this mean that you'll start practicing now?" Alex asked. "Cuz that would be cool."

Max tensed next to me. His voice was a biting growl, "We're not doing this for entertainment value, Alex."

Alex just smiled at him, holding his hands up in surrender in front of his chest. "Whoa, down boy."

"We know that, dear brother," Isabel said calmly, looking at Max as if he was being silly.

I turned my head to smile at Max, squeezing his hand. Through our bond, he was worrying about our future and he was still plagued by what had recently happened to me. Something that might very well happen again if I were to go into 'practice'.

Indubitably, Max was not ready to be calm and reasonable about this subject yet.

"Let's talk it over with your father first, okay?" I suggested, meeting Max's eyes.

His jaw muscles contracted, sharpening his contours and darkening his eyes, before he finally nodded.


TBC...

Well things are moving right a long. So Liz is now able to tap into the connection. That is a good thing. I got to wonder though what is going to happen at this meeting. I do love how very protective Max is of Liz.




Helen

WOW!!!

So much to read that I don't know what to FB! And it's your fault! lol

Now seriously, thanks for the three parts and I missed the story, this week-end! We had an awful weather and I consoled myself re-reading the old stories I had!

Liz is fantastic... Max should not feel responsible but more, help her to increase her strenght and possibilities!

Her, healing him was really an hit and I loved it! And without talking about the love scene it made me envious of them!

So thanks a lot - this story is a bomb! EVE

Great Chapters!!!! Please please please please please please please please please please come back and post more chapters really really really really soon? I can't wait to read what will happen next for Max and Liz. All I can say is wow. I just re read chapters 79 - 81 and wow!

From:
L-J-L 76

all caught up. wow this is a great story. I had to re read it again it's that good

Please come back and post more really really really really soon? I can't wait to find out what Max and Liz will do next.

From:
L-J-L 76

Helen (roswelllostcause)

So Liz is now able to tap into the connection.

It sure seems like it

Thank you for the feedback! How's the hunt for Command going? He's still out there...


Eve (begonia9508)

So much to read that I don't know what to FB! And it's your fault! lol

I missed the story, this week-end! We had an awful weather and I consoled myself re-reading the old stories I had!

That sucks. I should have been updating then, so you had something new to read... Sorry

Her healing him was really an it and I loved it!

It's a big thing

Thank you so so much for the feedback!


L-J-L 76

All I can say is wow. I just re read chapters 79 - 81 and wow!

That's all you have to say Thank you!!!


Natalie36

I had to re read it again it's that good

Thank you!!


From EIGHTY-ONE:

"Does this mean that you'll start practicing now?" Alex asked. "Cuz that would be cool."

Max tensed next to me. His voice was a biting growl, "We're not doing this for entertainment value, Alex."

Alex just smiled at him, holding his hands up in surrender in front of his chest. "Whoa, down boy."

"We know that, dear brother," Isabel said calmly, looking at Max as if he was being silly.

I turned my head to smile at Max, squeezing his hand. Through our bond, he was worrying about our future and he was still plagued by what had recently happened to me. Something that might very well happen again if I were to go into 'practice'.

Indubitably, Max was not ready to be calm and reasonable about this subject yet.

"Let's talk it over with your father first, okay?" I suggested, meeting Max's eyes.

His jaw muscles contracted, sharpening his contours and darkening his eyes, before he finally nodded.

EIGHTY-TWO

There was something about the way Philip Evans looked me over that I hadn't noticed before, but in retrospect I was fairly certain he had done to me several times. Max did the same thing. I wondered if they were scanning me. If they were unconsciously checking my status or consciously looking for injuries.

The reason why I noticed this time was probably because of the lingering slowness to Mr. Evans' 'scan'.

Max tensed next to me and I distractedly caught onto his insecure thoughts. He was wondering if his father was seeing something Max had missed. If Max hadn't healed me properly when I had fallen to the floor. Because even if Max hadn't felt allowed to remove my headache earlier, I was grateful that he hadn't been ruled by his self-blame (and not healed me) when my energy had been dangerously low as my limp body had connected with the floor.

Max was now wondering if there was something inside of me that he had not picked up on; something that could be hurting me.

Like a shocked and frightened man, awaiting the test results to his loved one, Max was holding his breath as his father's gaze moved up my body and slowly reached my face.

Mr. Evans frowned, a small barely noticeable twitch in the corner of his eye putting me on edge. I'm sure I wouldn't have noticed that twitch on my own. It was actually Max - who knew his father better - who had picked up on it.

"You're using non-human abilities," Mr. Evans stated slowly, his voice bouncing off the thick hushed anticipation of the room.

I nodded haltingly, still wanting to know why Max was stressing out, and why his father had frowned when he had seen me.

There's something wrong, Max whispered fearfully into my head, making my heart clench. But he's not going to tell us.

If he hadn't been so afraid for my health, Max's primary reaction right now most probably would have been anger. Instead, he reached for my hand and interlaced our fingers.

My eyes were fixed on Mr. Evans' face, enabling me to catch the faint interest in his eyes as he followed his son reaching out to grab my hand. I looked down at Max's and my hands almost expecting to see something fantastic.

But there was nothing odd about our handheld. His skin was darker than mine, his hand so large in comparison, the tightness of the grip visible to the eye as the tips of his fingers were white from the clasp, creating equally light areas of whiteness where the pads of his fingertips pressed into my skin.

"Let's take a seat," Mr. Evans suggested evenly and gestured towards the dining table. We had gathered in the common room of the hostel. Where pieces of exploding bread still covered the wooden floors, along with several puddles of water on the floor from me boiling the water in assorted pans and pots. It looked like the aftermath of the playtime of two under stimulated kids.

I moved forward in accordance with Mr. Evans' suggestion, but Max stood still, tugging me back with our clasped hands.

I looked over my shoulder at him, frowning. "Max?"

The connection was bubbling with his conflicting emotions, making me dizzy and making it impossible for me to read him.

With his strong pull, I stumbled into his body. He wrapped his arms around my waist, the difference in our height making him lift my body to the tip of my toes as he hugged me tightly, his warm lips touching the side of my throat as he pressed his head into the curve of my neck.

Are you okay? he whispered through my head, in a mental voice that told me that he was anything but.

I swallowed, that familiar fear making me feel weak. Too weak to reciprocate his hug. My arms hung at my sides, over his arms, as the pressure of his arms under mine had me float slightly in the air.

What do you see? I whispered, wondering if Max had figured out what Mr. Evans was reacting to (in his mild way of 'reacting').

His grip tightened, making it hard for me to take full breaths. But before I could object, he had realized what his panic was making him do and had eased off on his grip again.

There's something going on with your color field. I didn't think much of it, because you have just been unconscious and you've been drained of energy, but...

His anxious mental rant trailed off and my thoughts filled in, But he's seeing something else.

Moisture from his lips heated the side of my neck as he pressed a kiss there while thinking, You seem okay. I can't-

"Max," Mr. Evans interrupted us.

I had forgotten that we were not alone.

"Let's talk, shall we?" Mr. Evans suggested, his voice defining the concept of neutral.

The reluctance with which Max let me go tore at the very fundamental level of my cells. It was like he was cleaving himself in half by releasing the grip on my body.

I wrapped my hands around his left underarm and tugged him gently forward, towards his father.

"How are you feeling, Elizabeth?" Mr. Evans asked as Max pulled a chair out for me and silently gestured for me to sit.

I was concerned that Mr. Evans' observations of me was making me into a liar, which had my reply waver with uncertainty, "Fine?"

Mr. Evans nodded thoughtfully, before turning his intelligent and observing eyes to Max. "And you, my son? How are you?"

I'm not really sure why (because it could as well just be a father in general asking about his son's current status as means of being polite), but his question sent my stomach to my toes with ice-cold apprehension.

My eyes snapped to my lover's profile and I felt the immediate shock to his father's question be replaced by Max's annoyance. "I'm not the one who just passed out, Dad."

Was there something wrong with Max? I tried to swallow around the dry lump of frantic fear in my chest. Was Mr. Evans seeing something in Max?

I found myself wishing that I could scan him, see his color field (and know how to interpret it), so that I could tell if something was wrong.

I'm fine, Max spoke clearly in my head. But he failed to conceal his defensiveness and the wobbling insecurity.

"No, you didn't pass out, Max," Mr. Evans agreed. "But you two are bonded. What happens to her," he hitched his head meaningfully towards me, "happens to you."

My eyes shot to Max's face. I thought about feeling the knife go into my chest by Sean's hand. I thought about Max feeling my menstrual cramps. I thought about feeling the freezing coldness in his body when he was being kept half-naked in an ice-cold basement.

My heart was beating wildly in my chest as I asked Mr. Evans with a whisper, "What's wrong with us?" while still keeping my eyes on Max's profile.

Max's thoughts were matching mine. While I was going through memories of feeling whispers of his pain, he was sharing my nightmares, feeling my anxiety, soaking in my tears of grief from the death of my mother.

I was holding my breath as I watched his presence visit me in the shower, right back to a time when I thought I had imagined his presence, brushing it away with rationality. Before I knew he was an alien. At the very beginning of the best and worst period of my life.

Of course, I had unconsciously known for some time now that we had been sharing pain, not just emotional but also physical. Nevertheless, to hear Max's father say it made it frighteningly real. Did it mean that a sickness of mine, a fatal injury of mine, could kill Max? Was that why I had passed out when Max had been stabbed? Had I actually been injured too?

But Max had told Michael that we were not physically linked. Which I had interpreted as our life forces not being linked. The sustaining of our lives didn't depend on the other.

But how would Max know that? Could he know that? No one seemed to know that much about our type of connection.

The thoughts rushing through my mind were so quick, almost frantic, that not more than two seconds had passed when Mr. Evans' reply put a halt to my thoughts, "I'm not sure."

I had turned my eyes to Mr. Evans at his reply, but my attention was quickly returned towards Max as his sudden anger hit me right in the chest, threatening to send my heart rate off into a wild goose chase after my feelings.

He bolted up from his seat, making the chair topple over behind him with a loud clatter. I jumped in anticipation of the loud voice that would match the fury inside of him, but my body did a sudden 180 degree turnaround at the cold collectiveness of his question, covering me in shivering goosebumps. "How the fuck do you not know?"

My wide eyes stared at Mr. Evans, hoping for everyone's sake that he had an answer, and watched Mr. Evans' face harden, his eyes become unreadable, as he opened his mouth to reply.

But Max beat him to it. "You come in here and scare Liz to death by throwing around warnings about our health and then you don't even have a fucking explanation for it?" He was growling, forcibly pushing the words out through clenched teeth.

His whole body was tense while I was burning up with his anger. I curled my fingernails into the top of my thighs, forcing myself to take a deep breath. Trying to find solace, coolness, in the midst of the burning inferno of his relentless protectiveness towards me.

His tension was working itself into my body and I shifted uncomfortably in my seat, pressing my thighs together as my stomach coiled and tingles spread out to my fingers and toes.

"Watch your language, Max," Mr. Evans warned coldly while a wave of heat flushed over me, making my eyes shut while my back arched and my head dipped backwards.

I gasped loudly at the sensation, at the tearing of my insides. It was not necessarily painful, but horribly uncomfortable. As if someone was cooling me down while heating me up. As if every cell of my existence was sharpening with freezing crystallization while melting with unbearable heat.

"She's-" I heard Mr. Evans say, but Max interrupted him with a sharp, "I can see it."

His hands were moving over my body, his face leaning over my tilted head. I moaned (with desire?) as his hands fluttered over my body in response to his desperate thoughts to try and ground me to something. To pull me back from wherever I seemed to have gone.

"Fuck, Dad. What's-"

"There's nothing I can do," Mr. Evans said as my head lolled forward and my eyes opened. "I can't access her."

My breathing was harsh in my ears as I felt myself gravitating towards Max. My neck tightened to support my head as I looked up at him. I brushed his dark eyes to the side to quickly grab his neck with my shaking hands and crash my mouth to his.

I had a fleeting thought that this was inappropriate behavior. That I shouldn't yank Max down on top of me (as possible as that scenario was with me sitting on a chair) in front of his father, making Max almost lose his balance with the strength of my pull, grabbing tightly onto the edges of the chair, pressing the insides of his wrists against the outsides of my thighs, to prevent the chair from falling over with both of us.

I didn't care about how this might look. I didn't care that my boyfriend's father was right there. I was reacting to a strong pull inside of me. A strong pull to have Max close.

He was pulling me up from the chair by his hands under my arms, his tongue moving heatedly against mine, his gasps mingling with mine and our moans filling the stunned air. My legs naturally locked around his waist and my body pressed tightly up against his chest. Yes, my body did, not necessarily on a command by my mind. Because it felt as if it was moving by its own force.

I had no control.

The explanation hit us both at the same time. Cut through the thick desire that was threatening to implode inside of us, and had our lips separate with a breathless gasp. I'm sure the frantic expression in my eyes matched his as Max got out, "The connection-"

"-is doing this," I filled in, my body trembling from me denying it to fuse my lips with Max again.

Mr. Evans' voice caused us both to freeze and all heat that was swirling through my body rushed to my cheeks as the real world knocked, bearing gifts of chagrin and self-awareness. "Your fields are improving."

I should be used to it by now, but it was still odd to hear the complete absence of nuances to Mr. Evans' voice as he stated his observation as a mere scientific discovery. I wasn't sure if I would have been less or more embarrassed if he'd had the more normal parental reaction to seeing his 16-year-old son basically having his way with his girlfriend right in front of him.

The eyes of that aforementioned 16-year-old never left mine and his arms were tight around my upper body, supporting my weight and matching my trembles.

His thoughts were so loud in my head that it would be impossible to miss his next step.

Without acknowledging his father, Max told him, "Excuse us for five minutes."

Mr. Evans didn't object and I barely noticed his silence as Max nudged me to slide my feet down the back of his legs and make contact with the floor. My body brushing against his with the movement had me almost rupturing from pleasure.

I already knew what was happening.

If Max's suspicions were correct, that is.

Something had happened to me when I had used all that energy to 'play' with my newborn abilities. My energy hadn't been brought back into balance. I might have even shifted the balance within the bond itself.

Now it was guiding us. Guiding us on how to refuel.

I giggled at the thought (refuel ) as Max pulled on my hand and rushed me across the common room and towards the corridor.

"Max," I breathed, feeling weak, exhilarated, frightened, out of control and ridiculously turned on, as I tried to keep up with his minor race to the bathroom. "What about your father?"

"He doesn't want to see this," Max replied hurriedly, the desire in his body pounding through mine, making that two-faced concoction of pain and relief crumble up my cells and I stumbled as laughter bubbled up in me at Max's reply. At the deadpanned delivery.

But also... This was ridiculous. What was the bond doing to me? Who in their right mind interrupted a meeting with a grown-up (with a parental figure) to have-

Max barged through the bathroom door, spun my body around the doorframe to the inside by a tug on my hand, making my back impact abruptly with the tiled wall. His hand shot out towards the door and it slammed shut next to me. A brief glowing yellow light flared when he locked us in, before his mouth attacked mine.

I melted against his lips, my knees melting right along; his body pressing me up against the wall the only thing keeping me on my feet. He easily pulled me upwards, coaxing my legs to wrap around the top of his hips, as his teeth grazed my already swollen lips and his hands moved restlessly to my waist to push underneath my sweater.

My hands were shamelessly fumbling with the front of his sweatpants, my heels digging into the top of his firm ass as my feet worked to push his pants down.

The tiled wall was slippery, making me lose the support of my body, until Max pressed me further up against the wall, most likely bruising my back with the contact. Neither Max nor I cared. I didn't even flinch when my head impacted with the hard wall as I threw it backwards in response to the desire erupting from Max attaching his burning lips to the side of my neck.

I noticed the brief pause in Max's assault, of his consciousness making an attempt at swimming up through the thick desire, towards the awareness of my unacknowledged pain, but by then I had gotten his sweatpants down his thighs and was reaching inside the front of his boxers.

All thoughts left his mind as I wrapped my shaking fingers around him and his right hand momentarily stilled against my breast, unconsciously giving it a squeeze as his attention was brought to the actions of my hand.

It was the feeling of slow motion. Of that scene in a movie when water droplets would move so slowly through the air that they would become visible as crystal clear small balls of water. When strands of hair would billow softly from the breaths from a person that it looked like the gentle wings of some exotic bird. When eyes would blink so slowly that they seemed to be struggling against the weight of the eyelashes.

In that moment of suspended stillness, we slowly fell into the consuming darkness of each other's dilated pupils, as our bodies thrummed turbulently with building energy.

In realtime, it was a second before Max agitatedly dropped me to my feet to pull my pants down my legs. They conveniently dropped to the floor and was abandoned in a pile as I was hauled back up along his body, having me naturally clench my now naked thighs around the heated skin of his hips.

Catching my eyes, he kept looking into the depths of my soul as he vigorously captured my lips and, without even the whisper of a pause, thrust inside me. Even though I had known what would happen - could trace his thoughts even through the haze of lust - his movement was so sudden that my gasp bordered on a scream. His mouth inhaled the sounds of my pleasure as he moved inside of me. My back repeatedly slid up and down the wall, the hoodie I was still wearing offering no restraining friction against the slippery smoothness of the tiled wall. My nails raked down his back, dug into his strong back muscles, and my legs trembled with exertion around his hips.

I felt the tightening of the muscles of his behind against my shaking heels, and I knew that he was close. That realization ignited the tingles of the beginning of my own release, heat concentrating at the bottom of my spine and swirling around my pelvis, down my legs and into my toes. Spreading across the point of physical connection between us and seeping into our mental bond.

His pace picked up and he bit down into the top of my exposed shoulder as he searched my hands out, removing them from his back and bringing them up above my head. The consequent stretch of my upper body had me lose the footing on the build-up of gratifying tension inside my very being and I tumbled over the edge.

The screamed expression of his name mingled with his groaned utterance of my name on repeat as he poured into me.

Our release spread like a wildfire inside of us, making it impossible for him to stop moving, to stop making love to me. Together our movements rode out the wave, letting the energy swirl into our systems for several minutes before his hips gradually slowed down against mine and my legs lost their hold on his hips and started to slide down his legs.

But instead of wanting to sink to the floor in sated fatigue, in the after-effect of our intense mutual climax, my body was thrumming with strength and power.

He slowly slid out of me before my feet reached the floor. I took a step forward and pressed our bodies together while I wrapped my arms around his waist and buried my face in the softness of his T-shirt.

It felt weird. It felt odd to be naked from the waist down but restrained by clothes from the waist up. Still floating on the feelings of our joined orgasm, I was hit with the longing to feel the full expanse of his naked skin against mine.

My breaths were too fast, my heart still pumping ferociously from our 'quickie'. I smiled into his chest at the thought. Quickie. Another first. Something normal couples did.

Even if I was well aware of whatever had just happened wasn't normal. We had been directed like puppets in a show; the bond being our almighty puppet-master.

"Fuck," Max mumbled above me and I instinctively moved away from my post-coital happiness and tuned into his thoughts.

What I saw made me go ice-cold.

"I didn't think," Max continued, knowing that I had taken notice of his thoughts, "Fuck. I didn't think." His palms, warm and slightly damp, cradled my cheeks, angling my eyes up to his and his amber pools of emotions were tortured as they pierced into my chilled soul. "I'm so sorry. I should have thought. I lost control." He squeezed his eyes tightly closed and pressed his heated forehead against mine. "I can't believe I lost control around you."

"Max," I whispered through lips dry as sandpaper, moving my hands up underneath his T-shirt again. Needing to feel his skin against mine.

"Are you hurt? Are you okay?" he whispered in hurried anguish, mentally briefly stepping back from the most glaring issue which had plowed itself invasively between us.

But I needed his attention back on the pink elephant in the room. He already knew that I was okay. He already knew that I was more than just okay.

"Can't you check if something..." I blushed, "....happened? Like you did last time?"

Something starting with a 'B' and ending in 'aby'.

We were right back to that. Right back to what had happened the other night. Right back to losing the control over ourselves and not using protection.

How could we be this careless?

Max snapped his hands back from my face and turned away from me so quickly that I stumbled, my body having been leaning into his. He roughly pulled his boxers up over his hips before his hands flew to his head, threading angrily through his hair. The air was thick with the obvious struggle within him to not lose his temper around me. He didn't want to scare me.

If I hadn't been there, he would have slammed his fist into the rock-hard wall.

That fucking connection.

The thought was a scream through my head and I trembled. He started pacing the floor as he thought about the connection as a living person. As someone to blame. As if the connection was an evil manipulator who had set us up for this. Who had made us careless. Who probably wanted us to get pregnant so that the alien future was ensured. Or maybe even, to use the babies of our powerful connection as further weapons into some sick dominance over planet Earth.

With his relentless tirade burning through my body, I retrieved my pants from the floor and pulled them back on with trembling hands.

I wasn't even aware of doing it, but my mind tuned his out to be able to form my own thoughts. To make room for my own speculations. Was it true? Was the connection aiming to make us procreate? Was our need to refuel or energies, balance our bodies and strengthen the bond not the sole reason to our insatiable desire for each other? Was the connection actually trying to have us create a baby?

I wrapped my arms tightly around my middle. If it hadn't been for the energy simmering beneath my skin, my body would have sunk to the floor and I most likely would have started crying. I didn't really want to admit it, but Max's reaction was tearing me in all different directions, digging a horrible aching hole in the pit of my stomach.

We were both rational and intelligent people. We knew it wasn't a good idea to become teenage parents. Especially not in our situation. Max's confession to wanting to have children with me (in the future) was still fresh and very much alive in my memory and this should comfort me to not take his poorly restrained aggravation personally.

I wanted to wait just as much as he did. The idea of having a baby right now was as ludicrous as it was foreign and frightening.

But to see him so upset over having possibly impregnated me sought out my deepest insecurities and turned his frustration in sharp bullets aimed at the sense of security which had been placed over our relationship.

He was frustrated to a point of being completely blind to my emotional state. While struggling to get his feelings under control, focusing on not triggering any latent traumatized feelings in me, he barely glanced at me as his strained body bent down to pick up his pants and pull them up over his boxers.

"Come," he said shortly and grabbed my hand, unlocking the door with light glowing from his free hand before the grip of his other hand around mine persuaded me forward.

There was so much I wanted to say to him. I wanted us to talk about this. But his mind was cloaked in a black veil and I doubted that I could reach him.

"Please... Max..." I mumbled, not finding the right words. Not really knowing what to say.

My pleading gained the response of his harsh breathing and we had almost reached the common room as I sharply tugged on our connected hands, causing a flicker of awareness in his mind and his furious steps to slow.

My voice was sharp this time. "Max."

He came to a reluctant stop, his head bent forward with his eyes closed as his shoulders moved slowly up and down with his forcibly controlled breaths.

"Talk to me," I demanded.

His whole body was strained, even his voice. "Not now, Liz."

I frowned. "Yes. Now." Before we got back into the room with his father. Before we started to avoid what had happened. Before we sunk into some kind of state of denial.

"I'm too angry right now," he said, his tone warning. My mood was infected with his anger the second he started to pull his hand away from mine.

Biting my lips together, I tightened my fingers around his, preventing his withdrawal, and walked around his stiff frame to face him.

"Liz..." he cautioned slowly, his barely restrained mood making his voice tremble.

But he didn't scare me. He might think that he had the power to scare me. That I would be afraid that he would hurt me. But I knew differently.

"Whatever you did last time," I breathed, my aggravation making my chest rise and fall quickly with my breaths, "to check that there was no chance of a baby... Why are you not doing that now?"

I couldn't stop the tremble that rushed through me as he lifted his head and connected black eyes with mine. My mouth turned dry and my hands damp.

"Because last time it was a question of checking if I had-" he interrupted himself, a grimace of torment flickering over his face before he raised a finger and slowly traced it down my cheek. His touch was so soft compared to the danger in his eyes.

"It's using us," he said slowly, fire burning from his body into mine. "It's manipulating us. Dragging us along and getting us to follow its lead."

My breath was still in my chest as I listened to the bitter wrath soaked in betrayal coming out of his mouth.

"It's happening all over again." His jaw muscles clenched. "Just like with Sean. With Sarge." His body shuddered as I could feel the rage boiling with the intent to explode inside of him. "It's removing our free will. We're still not free." He tried to inhale a calming breath, but it only caused him to exhale harshly. "From one fucking prison to the next." He pulled his hand out of mine with a snap - the fear brought about from his monologue making me loosen my grip on him - and took one step back from me, as he bit out between clenched teeth. "We will never be free. Don't you see? We will never own the rights to our own lives."

He turned around and breathed tightly, "Fuck," as he threaded his hands through his hair. "Even our children will be manufactured. Born with a predetermined destiny."

I was having trouble breathing as I watched him fall apart in front of me, felt him crush my hopes and fuel a briefly forgotten misery over my role in the alien society.

"It protected us," I whispered. "It protected me against Sean." I pulled in a shaky breath, my fingernails pressing painfully into the palms of my fisted hands. "It has made it possible for me to share your feelings, your thoughts..." I swallowed as I watched the stillness of his back, facing me. "It's helped us with our memories, with our nightmares." I didn't want to fall into his despair. I couldn't. The connection couldn't be a bad thing. It couldn't.

I shook my head slowly and croaked, "It's given me strength that I've never-"

He sighed. The sound so abrupt that it cut off what I was about to say.

I was anticipating him to start speaking, but when he didn't say anything I licked my lips and softly added, "Connections aren't bad. You told me so yourself. You told me that connections are the link between aliens to connect them, to make them feel and care. You told me it was your race's equivalent of love. How can that be bad? Or manipulative? Or a trap?"

I stared at his broad stiff back, the seconds of silence stretching painfully around us.

"Please, say something," I said quietly.

There was another couple of long seconds before he actually spoke. "I hate this." His voice was low and resigned. "I hate that the only thing I had that would help you - that would keep you safe - is a lie."

I took a step towards him, raising my arms in front of me with the intention of placing them on his back. "It's not a-"

But he turned around before I could touch him. A tear rolled unhindered down my cheek at the torment in his eyes. At the wetness of frustration on his cheeks. At the tightness to his mouth and the lines of worry on his forehead. At the dark and haunted expression in his tired eyes.

He slowly reached forward and took my clenched hands, collecting them in both of his. Pulling the bundle of our hands to his lips, he placed a gentle kiss to the top of my knuckles, his eyes never leaving mine, as he whispered, "I need you to tell me the truth."

I searched his eyes for an explanation behind his words, but his mind was still in an upheaval, making it impossible for me to translate his thoughts. "Of course."

He struggled to get the words out, but once they passed his lips they were even and controlled. "Do you want me to let you go?"

I was stunned into momentary silence as I stared at him. It was the increasing fear in his eyes that startled me out of my stupefaction and I stuttered in a mixture of confusion and rawness, "Wh-what?"

"Do you want me to break the connection? To free you of it?"

I felt my whole body grow ice-cold under his probing eyes, my stomach twisting while my heart turned dark with fear.

"There's no need for it any longer," Max continued in the absence of my reply. "At least it won't be. Not after we have brought down Command."

I couldn't answer him. Not when it felt like I was dying.

"There's no Sean. No Sergeant. Soon the traditional rules will be changed. No one is standing in line to use your powers as a gaea."

I couldn't even cry. The tears were frozen in my eyes. My mouth was hanging open, my gaze drying as I forgot to blink. The sound of my slow heartbeat echoed loudly in the hollowness of my chest.

"I'll make sure that you're left alone. That you'll be left to live out your life in peace. A normal human life. I can remove your memories of this whole fucking mess if you-"

My quiet whisper cut him off. "How dare you?"

He pushed his lips tightly together and slowly let our joined hands drift downwards between us. His eyes were closing off at the shocked betrayal he (apparently) could read in mine.

"So just because the connection is removing your control," I uttered throatily, feeling empty and lifeless, "you're willing to just throw all of this away?" I tasted a fresh tear on my lip. "To throw me away?"

"That's not-" he started, anger darkening his features yet again.

But I wasn't done. I inhaled shakily, shaking my head slowly, tears blurring my vision, "I don't even know what to say. I'm..."

I felt so confused. So hurt. This was worse than seeing the look of enjoyment in Sean's eyes as he had tried to rape me.

The one constant in my life, through this 'whole fucking mess' as he had called it, was Max. And now he was pushing me away? After everything? All the torture, every pain felt and endured, every nightmare, every taunt, every whisper, every confession, every secret, every soft caress, every piece of exploding joy, every detail of unconditional love, every look, every glance, every brush of hands, every thought.

Every. Single. Moment.

"I want you to be happy," Max said, cutting into my heart further.

He wanted to turn it into nothing? Non-existent. As if it had never happened. As if the past couple of weeks of feeling the worst and best were to be erased like some kind of mistake.

"And you think this is making me happy?" I demanded, frustratedly wiping tears from my eyes and cheeks. "Do I look happy to you right now?!"

His body was so tense I thought he might snap in two as he whispered, his eyes closed off, "Liz..."

I took a step back, pulling my hands from his, and said hotly, "You want me to tell you the truth?"

He stared at me, not realizing until a second later that I actually needed an answer. Slowly, with a clenched jaw, he nodded.

I fiercely worried my bottom lip, searching for the words. "You are the most important person in my life."

Unexpected heat brushed the walls around his heart and my blurry vision didn't miss the tremble that raced through his taut frame.

"You're the love of my life." I brushed at more tears heating my cheeks. "You're the only thing that keeps me going. Without you..." Pain exploded in my chest at the thought, my whole body assaulted by painful tingles. "I will die without you."

His walls were crumbling in front of me, even when he was struggling to stay collected. Even when he was attempting to provide me with a damn free choice and his fucked up opinion on what was best for me.

"Baby..." he murmured, trying to close the physical gap between us.

His advance was met with my retreat.

"And for you to even suggest to remove my memories..." I whispered, my voice breaking in all the wrong places.

All those beautiful memories. Of him and me. Of us.

"I-" He was fumbling for the words, fumbling to regain control over the situation.

"Do you want to break the connection?" I fired at him, crossing my arms defensively across my aching chest.

"If you want me to, I-"

I interrupted him, my voice growing loud and strong, "No. That's not what I asked. What do you want, Max? You talk of free will; now's your time to use it. Do you want to be free of the connection and free of me?"

My voice tripped on those last three words and my arms tightened around myself. Trying to keep myself together. I tried to tune in to what Isabel had taught me in our yoga exercises. I tried to find my breath and let it calm me down.

"No," was his reply. A simple 'no'.

But it was anything but simple. It was a vehement quiet scream. Squeezed from his deepest and rawest emotions. Ripped from the deepest parts of his being.

Before I had a chance to react, he had closed the distance between us and fused our lips together. I sobbed into his mouth, my tears falling freely as the pressure over my heart eased off. I pulled my arms out from between our bodies and pressed my fingers into his back, flushing our fronts together, needing him close. Needing to make sure that he wouldn't let me go.

The connection, having been dimmed by Max, flared to life like a silent explosion in our bodies and minds, causing Max to pull back. I tightened my grip against his shoulder blades, warning him to get too far away, as he stilled and slowly started wiping the tears off my cheeks.

"Don't ever do that to me again," I warned him, a frightening coldness to my vulnerability.

He looked at me closely, contemplatively, before saying, "We need to know more about this connection."

He hadn't promised. He hadn't assured me that he wouldn't repeat what he had just asked of me.

"Max?" I demanded, boring my eyes into his.

"I won't leave you," he said with firmness. "As long as you want me around, I'll be around."

As if I would ever not want him around. It bothered me that he was still doing this on my premises. That he was not sticking up for himself. I wished he could have demanded that he wanted me around, instead of needing my permission. He was still so afraid to force me and to push life choices on me that I might not want. His fear of limiting my freedom in any way similar to how his society had done was setting him up for a ridiculously careful decision making.

He was still treating me like a China doll. Like I was breakable. Like I wasn't an equal part of a powerful connection.

Looking deeply into his dark eyes, I realized that we could never win this 'war' we were up against as long as he was weighed down by my fragility as a human.

I knew that he could hear my musings, which is why I purposely held his eyes, stating my silent challenge for him to loosen his control and let me stand on my own two feet. But I also knew that he was not ready for that discussion right now. I had already tried it just half an hour ago, so he knew what my opinions were.

For the time being - considering how close he was to exploding - I needed to back off. Give him the space he had given me on more than one occasion.

But before that, I had to point out that he should "Never again suggest that we should break the connect-", but him placing a silencing index finger to the center of my mouth silenced the end to my request.

"We are true even without the connection. It doesn't make us who we are. It doesn't have anything to do with our love. So if I find out that it's somehow hurting us, hurting you, I will do everything in my power to remove it."

I tried to swallow past the dry lump in my throat. I couldn't really argue with that. "Okay."

Max's jaw tensed again, hard-set determination in his eyes. "And I'm sure that dad knows more about this than he's been telling us."

"About...?"

"The connection," Max filled in. He brushed his fingers through my hair, tucking it behind my ears, before adding, "And he's going to tell us."

I silently nodded, hoping that Mr. Evans would tell us. Because I was afraid of what Max might do to him if he didn't.

Max entwined our fingers, the pressure of his palm against mine reassuring, as we walked towards the common room.

Mr. Evans' expression was collected, not diverging from the general impression I had of him, as we walked into the open-spaced room. I'm sure that he had heard our conversation in the hallway. I'm sure that he knew what we had done in the short time we had been away from the room.

But being the alien that he was, cool and lacking that natural string to his emotions, it didn't seem to bother him. If it did, he didn't let it show.

His only comment upon our arrival was, "Your force fields are intact."

Max's fingers flexed around my hand. "Of course they are. We have the connection to thank for that."

Mr. Evans didn't show any reaction to the loathing dripping off the word 'connection', instead leaning back against the backrest of the wooden pin chair and slowly folding his hands over his stomach.

"That is most likely correct," he concurred, causing Max to grow stiff with heated annoyance.

"I'm done with your bullshit," Max seethed and I automatically squeezed his hand, begging him to calm down.

Don't pick a fight with him, my mind warned him. He might not be so willing to answer our questions then.

Max scoffed. "I don't care if he's not willing."

I looked up at his profile, saw the coldness etched into the sharp lines of his jaw, and swallowed nervously.

"We're stronger than him, remember?" he was answering me, but his eyes never left the man who had fathered him. "Thanks to the connection, we are stronger than everyone."

Mr. Evans didn't move an inch. He sat perfectly still, looking almost peaceful. This only fueled Max's anger, which surprised me. I had known Max to be the cool one. The one that would face adversaries in the exact same collected way that Mr. Evans was doing now. I guess this is where Max got his control from. From his father.

But the Max I was feeling now was losing his control. That impressive control was cracking violently at the seams, threatening to do irreparable damage if completely unhinged.

The one thing that Max had counted on had been the connection. It had tied Max and I together. It had protected me when Max had been unable to. It had made Max feel closer to me, making me a part of his world, of his alienness. Oddly enough, it had made him feel more human.

Which is why his anger right now was not his typical anger. This anger was the result of a deep acidic betrayal. Of feeling tricked and fooled by the one thing that was supposed to be on his side. The one good thing to come out of his heritage.

He was struggling to control this deception, not knowing how to react to it. It was unfamiliar territory. A territory that had even momentarily made him try to push me away just now in order to protect me. Making him believe that I would be better off without him.

It was messing with his head, even messing with the connection itself. The thoughts I was getting from him were no longer clear-cut. They were jumbled and blurry, like looking through ripples of water. I had trouble reading him. I still had not truly gotten used to doing so, but this was different. This must be the connection reacting to Max's animosity towards it. Him turning against it.

"So try and fight us," Max challenged his father darkly. "Go ahead. Refuse us. I'm sure we can break into your mind any way and find out exactly what you've been hiding."

"Max," I gasped, horrified at his threat. He was taking this too far. This was getting out of hand.

But Mr. Evans didn't look upset. He didn't look...anything. Instead he minutely lifted his chin towards the chairs opposite him and said, "Take a seat. I'll show you what I know."

Max hadn't anticipated that. I could tell from the confusion that was making his body lose its tension and how his anger felt interrupted and suddenly misplaced.

"I'm assuming that you are much better at reading her mind than she is at reading yours," Mr. Evans said as we drifted towards the chairs.

Max was suspicious. "Yeah?"

Mr. Evans slowly rose from his chair, lifting it off the floor and placing it next to the one I had just sat down on. Seated next to me, the residing heat from Max's anger was billowing off his body and we both tensed when Mr. Evans came close.

Max's father looked me in the eyes as he took a seat opposite me, our knees almost touching, and I could actually trace how his gaze gradually softened. As if he was putting it on for my benefit, knowing that his defaulted neutral expression would most likely agitate me.

"I will form a superficial connection to you, Liz," Mr. Evans said, his voice matching the gentleness in his eyes. "And Max will be able to view what I'm showing you through your bond."

My heart rate was increasing, the beat growing louder and louder. Sean's and the Sergeant's faces were burning through the retina of my inner eye and I unconsciously reached out and dug my fingers around the top of Max's knee.

Mr. Evans flittered his eyes to Max and Max's voice was dry and tight as he warned, "If you hurt her..."

Mr. Evans held his son's eyes for a second before looking back at my anxious face, leaning in slightly, "I know what they did to you. I know that they put horrible images into your mind. And I can't undo that for you, I'm sorry."

I bit the inside of my cheek while Max pried my fingers away from his knee and transferred my tight grip to his hand.

"I will show you my memories," Mr. Evans continued. "And some of them might be uncomfortable for you, but most are predominately informative. It will, perhaps, help you and Max understand the connection. Maybe it will help you put some pieces together that I myself haven't been able to."

I knew that he wouldn't hurt me. I was more certain of this than Max was, because I would forever remember the strength and the soothing of my pain supplied by him when tending to me in captivity, right after I had hurt Sean. I had seen another side of Philip Evans then and my trust for him had deepened.

It was not Mr. Evans that frightened me. It was the reminder of someone forcing their memories of the torment of my loved ones onto me.

"Will that be okay?" Mr. Evans asked when I remained silent.

"Yes," I gulped, extremely aware of Max's conflicting opinions about this whole thing.

"Why can't you just tell us?" Max asked tensely.

Mr. Evans reached for my free hand, his eyes silently asking for permission to take it, as he answered his son, "I think it's important for you to see it. Experience it. A lot of the details are difficult to describe with words."

I lifted my hand in permission for him to take it. His hand was dry, marked by time and possibly the continuous scrubbing with soap due to the hygienic needs of a doctor. But his pressure against my hand was just as even and secure as Max's.

Being held by both Evans men, I looked at Mr. Evans and gave him a simple nod.

"Okay," Mr. Evans acknowledged.

Gently, he initiated the feeding of the first memory he wanted to show us into our joined minds.


TBC...

Gah! You've been posting lots and I'm woefully behind in my feedback. As cute as I sound with head colds (and let's admit it - I sound adorable) it doesn't make for good response time. But, as you posted three parts the other day (did you hear my heart stop momentarily when you did?) I thought I would post two chapters worth of feedback every time you updated until I was all caught up. Thus you won't have to respond to twenty at once. *laughs*

Okay. Back in a few with 75 & 76.

Feedback Chapter 75

Dear Lord did you spoil us with this chapter! It was like the length of two or three chapters! I'm not complaining though.

I love how Max is continually so gentle with her. Sometimes I think he's making up for all those times growing up where he *couldn't* be this gentle with her. Treating her this way is as much for *him* as it is for *her*. It's as though he's trying to heal all her wounds and traumas - even the ones she can't remember. I wonder if he is also trying to prove to himself that he can be good and loving as much as she needs despite his alien side. (Though in all honesty, I think he is able to love her as much as he does because of his Antarian. With their feelings being so primal and all.)

I love you mentioning Christmas! It made me smile a lot. I'm sure that it was difficult for everyone there but possibly one of the best as well - they have hope for a new system coming soon. In some ways it makes Liz hiding in the bathroom all day (and Max sitting outside it) even more heartbreaking. While everyone else was trying to celebrate it in small ways (board games, movies, a Christmas meal, possibly small gifts - whatever) Max refused to leave Liz's side or force her out just because he had different plans for their first Christmas together.

The way you wrote him talking about that just felt so real and heavy and heart clenching. (All in a good way though, love.) But at least, as Liz said, they aren't still locked in their separate prisons. And the greatest gift that Max could get would be Liz opening up the connection again.

And for Liz to be given the gift of *hope* again (no matter how small) - there is nothing that compares to that (and the connection). I loved hearing all the things that he thought about. To think that he was, at some point before everything blew up, dreaming about those things with her. Gosh it just makes what they went through even more heartbreaking for him. But at the same time it was getting to see inside of Max in a way that we normally don't get to. So I loved it!

Okay so a couple of things about "babies."

While it may *seem* like I'm pushing for them to have children (because of all my questions and musings) in actuality I'm not. At least not yet. They're young, they've gone through a lot, they're healing, they're at the beginning of a revolution and it's not yet safe for them to have a family. Plus they deserve some time where it's just the two of them for a little while. That way they at least feel like they got to do things somewhat "normally."

*That* being said - what I want to know (in case you've forgotten about the last hundred times I've asked - not that I'm persistent in my questions or anything ) is (1) is it possible for a Gaea to have a child with an Antarian and (2) what would be so special about that child?

After all "Gaea" is in reference to the goddess of the earth and the mother of the Titans. If the Gaea line was found on earth (and not an Antarian based) then does the reference to "mother of the Titans" hold any clue? I imagine the offspring would be powerful but in what way? In their powers? Energy levels? Those two seem obvious. But it's like there's something else that we don't know about yet.

Given the fact that the Sgt tried so hard to have children with Nancy and the fact that Max seems so sure that he and Liz can it seems that I have the answer to my first question. But that could just mean that it was *theoretically* possible for a Gaea to have a hybrid child - not that any Gaeas actually had. (Especially with their being so few Gaeas.) Which would explain why the Sgt tried so hard. If they knew it would be difficult (but possible) it explains why he put Nancy through so many pregnancies - thinking one would eventually stick.

Which means that the Sgt was probably told at one point that Nancy wouldn't be able to be put through many more pregnancies (even human pregnancies) before it permanently destroyed her chance of having *any* children - human or otherwise. Thus the reason she only had Liz. Otherwise I have no doubt that certain members of the society would push for her to have at least two daughters - if not more.

Side note: Wouldn't you love to be a fly on the wall during *that* conversation between all the healers and the Sgt? I imagine that *at least* Philip and his father would have come together to insist the Sgt not permanently harm Nancy - and thus the Gaea line. I'm sure Steven didn't like being told (by a lower ranking person) that he couldn't do what he wanted with *his* Gaea anymore.

Obviously there's the issue of whether Liz's genetics are the right ones to produce a healer as well. Philip would know. I wonder if Max knows as well. If he does can you imagine how difficult that would be for him to keep quiet in regards to Philip's comment about needing to "keep the healing line in tact"? It would have been on the tip of his tongue to say that Liz was a viable candidate. (Without, of course, being as calculating as many others have been when it comes to their offspring.) Possibly the strongest candidate there is.

Max has to at least know what the theories of a Gaea-Hybrid child are. He probably would have been made aware of it when it became biologically possible for Liz to have a child. It would be yet another reason he would hate his people. The fact that they would go to those extremes in using her (and probably any children she had) without her actual consent (instead, using mind control on her). It would have really made him sick given how Sean physically treated her.

It seems like there's still so much for Liz to learn about that. But at what point is it good for her to know that? To know why her mother was assaulted so much might help but then to know they were planning the same thing might make things worse. But then *not* telling her might be considered dishonest. She *should* be told but who's the best to tell her? Max seems like the first option but I doubt he'd present the information in the least unbiased light. Philip? Next logical conclusion but sometimes he comes across as too unfeeling. Hmm...

There's still so much to learn (both about some Gaea things and a lot of Antarian things). Let's hope that Liz isn't overwhelmed with it all. And that Max isn't too overprotective while she learns it.

I loved the teasing between the two of them about Liz's lack of self control. That and Max's reaction (tensing) when Liz was telling him she was having trouble opening the connection was too funny! And I *loved* them joking about being dopes together. It was this cool spring of water in this emotional desert they've been in. I could re-read that part alone a thousand times. So sweet and funny!

I'm glad that Max was able to stop Liz from putting up her walls again when she automatically started to. It's as big a step for him as it was for her. It's the first time we e actually seen him (sort of) fight for their connection. Obviously that's what he's been doing all this time but there's a difference. Before he wouldn't admit that *he* wanted their connection - that he wanted *her* - and was actually willing to fight to fully keep her. It's always been about keeping her safe. To some extent it's also been about defying his society's laws.

This time, even if it was unvoiced (and possibly unrecognized) he was fighting to keep *her* because he wanted her. That's a big step for him. Hopefully he can keep making big steps like that.

*laughs*

I'm pretty sure "kinda miffed" is the understatement of the century.

In all honesty I imagine that there are quite a few times when he's so livid he wants to strangle someone. Even without those images in her head. He would know some of what happened to her. I imagine his father and some of the others know things as well. And hearing about them, which he would probably insist on as they pertain to *his* bonded, wouldn't exactly endear him to the rebellion or to his own society. :-/ He'd honestly have trouble not strangling people at times. I imagine it's helpful to have members of the rebellion there though. If nothing else they could train with him which would allow him to get some of his anger out in energy blasts. Though he'd have to make sure to not overdo it - otherwise he could end up pulling from Liz. Anyways, I digress.

It's an interesting theory - the connection killing Sean and the Sgt to keep Max and Liz safe. It makes a lot of sense. Though if it was directed by someone I can see that someone being Max more than Liz. She was more scared by the touch. Max would have felt her fear and become angry at the thought of her being hurt. Plus he's probably been more physically abused than she has. So he might be more likely to strike out due to that as well. But I don't think he was fully aware of doing it (if indeed he did). Or maybe he's simply forgotten given how weak he was at that point. A simple thought of "don't touch her!" could have caused that reaction in those circumstances.

It was dangerous to use that much energy though given how weak they both were. I imagine it wouldn't have worked as well for others if they weren't tied to such a strong Gaea. He'd have been dead way before then.

I love Liz. Even her "flaws" (though they don't seem to be overwhelming by any means). But I still can't help but wonder why she felt bad about the Sgt. and Sean dying. I'm not one for killing just because. It's horrible and changes people, changes lives, etc. After all, almost everyone has someone who loves them.

But to feel bad over ending the tyrannical rule of a rapist, an attempted rapist and what were probably both murders (besides Nancy)? I don't feel bad about that. If you think about it in terms of energy, she's removed a lot of powerful negative energy. Now that energy (after all, they were two of the strongest in the opposition, according to Max) can be overcome with good energy. Good Antarians versus evil aliens basically. And the ones who are smarter and have more energy will win. So getting rid of powerful bad energy that can be used against them seems to be a good thing as well.

But then maybe I just think that some people need to not be given a thousandth chance to hurt more innocent people again. Especially not people as dark as Sean and his father.

I can see her feeling bad about reducing the number of aliens. Especially since they were both full bloods. But then the negative traits in that family seemed to be passed down more than the good ones. So maybe that's a good thing? And it had to be better that they weren't directly killed by Max's hand while they were continually held prisoner. Otherwise I imagine their punishments would be worse.

The use of high frequency to disrupt Max's powers interests me. I'm sure it's not the only thing they used in order to subdue him, especially the time that Liz burned Sean. Otherwise they would have been able to use that from the get-go and shouldn't have had as many problems with Liz being able to defend herself. Of course I always did wonder why Sean chose to beat her instead of bonding with her. Perhaps he knew that Max wasn't really subdued, merely "sidelined"? Obviously they did something else to him during the last time Sean attempted to rape her. Maybe made Max unconscious like they had (tried to do) with Liz when transporting her? The connection is probably the reason why she didn't go under. And it could be what woke Max up enough (if that is what they did) in time for Max to save her.

Of course that means the connection is only somewhat affected by the high frequency. Which explains why they could still talk mentally even when Max's powers were offline. Maybe that's why Liz could still burn Sean? But then does that mean Max's powers are a part of the connection and as long as he's alive (and not blocking it) neither the connection not Liz need his permission to use his powers? That seems right. Or maybe his powers are a part of the connection in the same way we upload data to online storage. Hmm... That'll be interesting, seeing how you explain that one in the course of the story I mean. I have a feeling that could be a deciding factor at times when it comes to battles.

They also couldn't have used the higher frequency all the time if other aliens ever came in to use their powers to torture him. Which I imagine they did. So how did they keep him from fighting back at that point? Could a frequency "gun" really be that precise to only hit one person regardless of distance between Max and any other alien? Hmm...It could make another valuable war time weapon if it is.

I agree with the safety in numbers bit. I wonder why there weren't more Antarians around though. It seems as though, regardless of whether the rebellion was leading an attack or not, there should have at least been someone monitoring security and Max's cell. *Especially* with Liz in it and the rebellion attacking.

One of the first things they should have done would be to put extra guards around that area to secure the "weapon" from the rebellion group. Instead the Sgt (whether or not he knew about the attack) takes his teenage son, who is emotional and obviously isn't good at controlling himself and brings him into a room with Max. I know he probably would never had done so if he knew Sean had a knife but still. No good could come of that.

But I'm guessing the Sgt might not have been aware of the attack. Someone might have waited until he went down to Max's cell to give the green light to the rebellion to attack. Someone who might have been watching on the security cameras and then went down to join the rebellion. But then why not stay in the security room and give info to the rebellion of where any other enemies might be coming from? They obviously didn't if Liz was the one who had to call Philip. Hmm... maybe I'm completely off base. But then maybe the attack led by Dresden (yay for him being a good guy! They need as many as they can get!) wasn't some big "guns blazing" kind of attack but more of a covert rescue. With the purpose of getting in and out without being noticed. Which means their identities would still be hidden as well (hopefully).

But then why only bring Sean if you're the Sgt and not at least have a guard stationed outside the door while you're in there? Hmm...

Command not being there after dropping Liz off is interesting. It's not like Max and Liz were together all that long before the Sgt and Sean went into the room. Maybe a couple of hours? So Command being gone seems highly suspicious.

First off, it would seem like he would want to monitor any interactions between Max, Liz and the Carters. At least to see how Max and Liz react - that way he knows if Liz has told Max anything through the connection. (Or vice versa.) How else will they start pinpointing how the connection works so they could either use it or break it?

Secondly why leave before seeing how the two of them interact just by themselves? During such an emotional reunion you never know what they might reveal. Better to be there until Liz comes out of her drugged state so he doesn't miss that. Because so far all the people under him haven't been doing their jobs or are plotting against his government. Hmm...

He's either secretly good or really, really evil and was working on something else. If that's the case let's hope that one or the other isn't ever re-captured before all of this is finished. That would be horrible.

On to lighter bits - I loved Liz promising to eat as long as Max made her pancakes. That was so sweet. And yay for fixing the pancake memory! *laughs*

Okay, I've probably dragged all that out longer than need be. So I'll shut it now. Plus this way you can be motivated to post more. Agreed? Good! *laughs*

Chapter 76 Feedback

I love that Max is the one taking care of Liz! I think it's good for so many reasons.

First he *does* have that control factor and everything has been *out* of his control for so long that this finally helps him get back to his sense of normal as well. In fact he's been "out of control" for years (very likely since the beginning as far as we've gotten hints of in this story) when it comes to Liz Parker's care and any treatments. This is the first time he's been *allowed* to have that kind of control (though I'm sure it wasn't up for discussion) and he fully intends to do things the right way regardless of what anyone else wants.

Secondly, along with the control, he very likely didn't feel like he was protecting Liz or helping her enough while they were captured. This allows him to sort of "make up" for that as best as he can. He knows he can't ever erase what happened to her (well he *might* be able to but he won't). However, he can walk through the aftermath with her, battling her demons with her and sharing his with her so she learns how strong she is.

Thirdly, it does allow him to move her at a pace that allows her to heal correctly. There's no unnecessary pressure he's going to put on her and he's certainly not going to try and put more alien issues on her during this time like others might. Even if his father understands her limits and what happens he barely gave them a few minutes after both waking up together before dropping all that information on them before. While he might have been trying to do the right thing by giving them information I don't think he necessarily went about it the right way. (After all it made Liz shut down the connection.) He and the others in the rebellion have been preparing for this for a long time and have likely risked a lot. So for them time is even more important than what it appears to be. They'd be more likely to press Liz before she was ready.

Lastly, it allows Liz to go from a time where she was angry (and rightfully so - occasionally) that Max was keeping things from her to an appreciative state where she's glad he *is.* She's learning that sometimes he keeps things back and that's a *good* thing. Every relationship has moments where one or the other *shouldn't* say or do something. Their connection may make that harder to an extent but it's still a valid thing they need to learn. One day he may never have to keep such things (alien things) from her again. Still to have that juxtaposition (the two different emotions that result from him keeping things hidden) is a positive thing. She's learning to trust again - even more so than before the double bond (which is a big thing considering what happened afterwards). And if she can trust Max to take care of her *because* he keeps things hidden then she'll be able to trust him if he has to do so later. She'll also be able to trust him when he starts bringing her more into the alien side of what's been going on. So his controlling tendencies are a really good thing right now. I have a feeling it's going to be hard for him to let go of them though when the time comes.

At some point Liz is going to have to be pulled back in to the alien struggles. And even if they decide to tuck tail and run (which I doubt given how much Max provably wants to kill Command) Liz still needs to know everything before making that decision one way or another.

But Liz is right - she has seen the darkest side of the Antarian race. But hopefully she's starting to see the good side as well through her extended family. After all, humans have a similarly dark side. She's just been very lucky in that she hasn't had to go through anything like that by human hands. In that way I suppose that humans and Antarians are quite similar.

It's interesting to me that Max kept Liz's days completely full. I would think that having some time to just get a little out every day would be a good thing. But then as I thought about it she really *does* have that as an option. They're just in safe places with other people around her.

She's able to get stuff out when she goes for walks with Max, when she's with her dad, Alex, Isabel, etc. It's just safer than doing it alone because she won't get too overwhelmed so easily. So as much as I was (at first) going "give the girl a break!" I actually agreed with Max as I started to read more. But then I probably shouldn't have doubted him given how well he knows Liz.

I love the fact that Max and Liz get to take walks together. It's probably as close to "dating" as they can get right now. But then again they're basically past that stage. *laughs* It's good for every relationship to continue dating though. Especially Max and Liz given all that they're dealing with. To have some time outside of the walls they're living in just to spend together with no one else around... That's priceless. Even more so for Max I imagine. Ignoring everything else he's always wanted to be able to be that close to Liz. To be able to hold her hand, talk to her, have her talk to him - it's all been a (secret) dream of his for so long and now he can have it. It has to be a balm for both of them.

And I find it funny that Philip was concerned about them going on walks together. But then someone doesn't have to attack to have it be dangerous. They could just watch them, gathering information like how long they walk, where they're likely to go, when they turn back, if anyone ever comes with them or scouts it out before, etc. So in that way Philip is right to be concerned. Hopefully it doesn't ever become an issue.

I'm hoping there are the buildings as well that surround the hostel which the other members of the rebellion of staying in. I wonder how they were able to keep all of that hidden from command and the others though? I imagine they pooled that money and bought everything through a trust or something. Still to set that up as a training ground and basically a base camp of sorts would have taken some time. Obviously the rebellion has been around for quite a while. Which makes sense given everything that was happening when Liz was a child.

I am glad that Liz is spending time with Jeff in the evenings. She's basically gone a couple of months without a parental figure she can talk to and with everything that is been happening she really needs one. The fact that he knows what is going on and he wasn't the one that had suffered at the hands of the aliens makes it much easier for them to talk together. I imagine that if it was Nancy instead of Jeff it would be harder for her to be objective about the whole situation.

It's nice that Liz and her father are able to talk about Nancy as well. For them to be able to mourn her as they go through and find out about the other part of her life is really important. Neither one of them would be able to mourn her properly if they didn't know about that at the side. It makes you wonder how much she was aware of the aliens existence, etc. during her last days.

Even if she wasn't aware of them it's nice that others like Alex are able to fill in some of the blanks. Of course now you have me wanting to know what some of these funny situations are! *laughs* Poor Jo! There's just no winning. You give me a chapter that answers a lot of my smaller/background questions and it just makes me ask for more. *laughs* I'm going to have to send you five pounds of candy at some point.

It's good that Liz is letting Alex hopefully though. I hope that Jeff is able to do the same thing. Speaking of Alex and Jeff has Jeff been a part of any of the rebellion meetings? Obviously he is not an alien and he's technically in mourning but he does know about the Antarian's existence now. And it is his daughter that they're wanting from help from. And it was his wife they killed. We still don't know what all was going on around that time - how the Sgt and others figured out there was a rebellion force. I imagine it had something to do with Liz getting closer to becoming an activated Gaea but I'm still not sure about what the trigger was. How the old system found out about the rebellion force. It's what ultimately led to Nancy being "used up" the rest of the way and therefore her death. So it seems like something Jeff and Liz would want to know before attending the meetings. But then maybe it's better to go into the first meeting or two without that info weighing them down. Hmm...

And yay for yoga making its appearance! *laughs*

I'm glad that Isabel is able to take this time and bond with Liz while simultaneously helping her. It's good for Liz on so many levels! But I definitely understand the intimidation of doing yoga with someone who's really good at it while you're just starting. But then, really, would you want to do it with someone who had no idea what they were doing?

You can actually give yourself a pretty good injury if you push yourself too hard too quickly or if you do the poses too incorrectly. Most people don't realize it but it's true. (Of course I'm preaching to the choir here. *laughs*)

Still it's good that Isabel has been so patient with her and walked her through the emotional releases as well. That's actually really good for Max as well. The fact is he can, through his sister, slowly build trust with other people not just being around Liz but touching her even when she's emotional or jumpy. For him to have that kind of support structure to help take care of Liz is a good thing since he can't be there a hundred percent of the time (even if he would like to be). Plus it's obviously a good way for Liz to get used to people touching her as well. She's in a calm environment, her mind is learning to focus and she's learning to relax after weeks of stress.

Speaking of relaxing I found it hilarious that Isabel jumped up to yell at Max from a relaxing position. *laughs* That does seem like something she would do as we've gotten to know more of her. Though maybe it was not the best of plans for Max to simply sit and watch. Part of me thinks he knew that lights would flicker and all that jazz. I'm sure there's a reason he was working out so intensely while Isabel and Liz were doing yoga. And I'm almost positive it was to keep Kia mind from wandering to other thoughts. *laughs*

So that whole "looking down at his phone" thing - nice try to play it innocent on his behalf but I'm not sure if I buy it. Still I loved that bit of foreplay between the two of them. It's so good( and healing) to see them not try and hide that part of their relationship from each other or even other people. I thought it was incredibly sweet for him to join in on the yoga sessions when he obviously never really has before. All for the love of a woman, right? *laughs* But for Liz to be able to have so much to laugh at during that first session would have made both Max and Isabel feel good - even if they were a to tinsy bit annoyed at each other as well.

I'm really glad that Max is able to help Liz start to overcome the physical assaults she suffered as well. Her emotions and reactions are likely so completely different to his right now that he's exercising an incredible amount of self-control in order to heal her. I'm sure his reaction is to just lose himself in her. After all, the brief hints we've gotten about his time in captivity seem to be about them threatening Liz or mentally torturing him by torturing *her.* I'm sure they beat him too but that wouldn't have been the worse of it for him. All he would want (and what he would need to heal) would be to be as close to her as possible and right now he's having to go about that very slowly.

Maybe that's a good thing on his end too. It makes him work through some of his demons instead of just burying them by joining with Liz sexually. They'll both be stronger this way and two or five years down the line they won't have to worry about Liz (or him) doing massive back tracking in their healing.

Interesting that Max is able to use his healing powers in that way as well - to warm up the places she still felt cold at. Now she won't have to take scalding hot showers that don't really solve the problem. I hope that even though they suffered at the hands of the aliens Max is able to see that being an Antarian isn't all bad. He's able to help Liz in ways he would never be able to if he were a human.

Even just getting her out of a locked bathroom would be more difficult if he didn't have powers. Not to mention walking through the nightmares and memories with her. It's sort of a double edge sword. On one hand it wouldn't have happened if it weren't for his people. On the other he'd never be able to help her so much after *any* assault if he wasn't who he was.

The memories and nightmares they have to suffer through are horrible! I can't imagine going through all that without having a breakdown while it was happening. The connection really did keep them sane and saved them. It's definitely going to be stronger than anyone realizes after it had to work that hard.

I wonder if the next time Max and Liz are together if they'll feel that deepening of the connection again. Not the same but sort of. More like a falling deeper or a snapping of the connection into its final place. I can almost see the two of them easily being able to adjust the level on it like a dial on a radio. Where, when it's deeper, they both visibly glow regardless as to whether they're touching or even in the same room. Plus they'd probably be able to see/hear what the other person was doing (without help) by focusing - much like Max did during Liz's anxiety attacks before. So would Liz be able to heal as well? If she connected to Max a bit more deeply?

Let's say for example that she didn't necessarily want Max healing her every time she had a period. I mean as sweet as that was and as much as they love each other they were just some things that you want to keep private. Obviously he's going to know when she has them. In fact that got me thinking that he has probably always known whenever she had one. (Unless he was absent from school them and didn't stop by the Crashdown.) He would've been able to tell because of her colors. At least it was in the middle of the night so Liz didn't realize that. It would've made everything even more embarrassing for her.

But seriously - sweetest guy ever! And so convenient to have him be a healer at that exact moment. *laughs*

Speaking of healers, I'm glad that Mr. Evans is allowing Max to do what he needs to do. It can't be easy to be forced to wait after all these years of planning and with the level of danger where it's at. I guess one consolation is the fact he knows Max would want Command dead. Command is the one that allowed all of this to happen, he's the one that kept threatening ways to get Max to comply or to just torture Max and he's the one that eventually moved her with no one knowing about it. That last one is actually the most terrifying because he could've taken her anywhere even killed her. So even if Liz wants to run I imagine that Max wants Command dead more.

Time is running out though, so I'm hoping that there is some kind of shift or a breakthrough. I mean it's great that Mrs. Evans is able to come and cook for them and that Liz has this extended family around her but if everyone is killed off because they wait too long it doesn't really matter. I don't think you would take us this far though and then do that.

Still when all this starts moving along or is over how are you going to bring Maria back into the picture? She is such a big part of Liz's life and right now that feels like a very big loose end or plot hole. I mean just having one or two chapters with Liz telling her everything and then their best friends again seems almost anti-climactic. So... Are you going to tell me? *laughs*

Now, in regards to your note at the end about there being no dialogue. I didn't even read it like that. I actually found it full of dialogue, just not really specific dialogue. I could hear where they laughed, where they cried and where Isabel and Max were "arguing." And, if you want to be technical, Isabel did have actual dialogue.

But seriously I think you've just developed these characters so well that we can hear them talking to each other even when we don't know all the exact words. You've brought them to life so reading it as it was written didn't feel like anything was lacking. Very few people can do that so you should be really proud of yourself.

And with that being said I've finished yet another one! *laughs*