Skeezy-Ass Boyfriends

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Zanssoulmate08
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Skeezy-Ass Boyfriends

Post by Zanssoulmate08 »

Okay, I have this friend. Let's call her Sally, shall we? Anyways, we just resumed a friendship that was kinda left on the back burner for a while and are closer than ever. The only problem is her boyfriend...Dan. Dan keeps grabbing my ass and picking me up. Now, I am by no means overweight, but I'm the curvy type that ya know, most guys generally don't like picking up. Not even my guy friends do that and I barely know Dan. He really makes me feel uncomfortable, but every magazine I've ever read says to never make your friend choose b/w you and her boyfriend (even if he is a skeezy-ass son of a bitch! :x ). I know he does this to her other friends too so it's not that he's into me or anything...I don't know, maybe he's horny? I'm really confused and could use some serious advice right about now.

Please Help Me! :?

-Sarah
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Once upon a time in a faraway kingdom,
Man made up a story, said that I should believe him.
Go and tell your white knight that he’s handsome in hindsight,
But I don’t want the next best thing.
So I sing, I hold my head down, and I break these walls ’round me.
Can’t take no more of your fairytale love.
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Lady_vixen
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Post by Lady_vixen »

In my years I have learned that for whatever reason..we women never trust each other enough to beleive. My suggestion which I know sucks is stay away. Send a indirect message to your friend.
Has she ever seen him do this to you? If so tell her that him invading your personal space makes you uncomfortable. That way you are not saying that he is hitting on you and maybe she can pay more attention. I know me personally...I dont care who you are..if I have not invited you in then dont come in.(personal space that is)
Good luck. I hope it works out.
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Morning Dreamgirl
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Post by Morning Dreamgirl »

Why should you worry so much about her?

The problem here, is him.

I know that you should tell her, and I agree with what was said before about being saying it was personal space and as nicely as possible, but when it comes down to it, it's not going to stop until you tell him to.

The next time that he does it. Politely ask him to stop. Tell him that while you appreciate he can be open with people, you prefer to maintain distance.

If it doesn't work and he does it again, gently, but more firmly, restate what you said before. Tell him that you really meant it and that you hope he can respect your wishes.

If he does it a third time (after being warned twice) tell him that he will stop or you'll have to get someone else involved. Then do it. Get the other girls that it bothers and have them come with you. Talk to the principal or guidance counselor, or someone who is in authority.

Sure, you should tell your friend, but don't do it in a matter where she thinks he's trying to hit on you. Just tell her that when he picks you up like that (or whatever else he does) it makes you uncomfortable and that you wanted to tell her because you value your relationship with her and know that he means a lot to her. Then tell her that you've asked him to stop, but wanted to let her know too so that it wouldn't get blown out of proportion.

If he continues (a second and third time), make sure that you tell her about it at those times to. Just make sure that you stay calm and in control, otherwise it'll seem like you're jealous even though you want him to stop.

If, however, he does manage to stop after just one warning, tell her that you appreciate it and that you're happy you were able to come to her about it without her getting upset. (She can relay the message to him if she wants and you won't have to worry about him getting the wrong idea by you telling him.) Besides, you want her to know that you appreciate the fact that she handled it so well... it'll make it easier for her to realize where you're coming from if something like this were to happen again.

Good luck!

Ashley
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Lady_vixen
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Post by Lady_vixen »

Good advice.
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Zanssoulmate08
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Post by Zanssoulmate08 »

Thanks guys! I'll keep you posted!

-Sarah
Image



Once upon a time in a faraway kingdom,
Man made up a story, said that I should believe him.
Go and tell your white knight that he’s handsome in hindsight,
But I don’t want the next best thing.
So I sing, I hold my head down, and I break these walls ’round me.
Can’t take no more of your fairytale love.
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Zanssoulmate08
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Posts: 220
Joined: Sat Oct 08, 2005 6:30 pm
Location: In my happy place, entertaining myself with shiny objects.

Post by Zanssoulmate08 »

Well, it turns out that Dan cheated on Sally (suprise suprise :roll: ) and she found out from another friend. She dumped him and now I don't have to worry about hurting her and can tell Dan to "Get the fuck off of me!"! Yay! :D
Image



Once upon a time in a faraway kingdom,
Man made up a story, said that I should believe him.
Go and tell your white knight that he’s handsome in hindsight,
But I don’t want the next best thing.
So I sing, I hold my head down, and I break these walls ’round me.
Can’t take no more of your fairytale love.
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Lady_vixen
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Post by Lady_vixen »

Glad that turned out well. If telling him to F off does not work..kick him in the.... That works. LOL kidding. Violence is bad but say it like you mean it and hopefully he will get the picture.
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killjoy
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Post by killjoy »

Most of us guys know that touching, grabbing or whatever without permission is wrong. But there are assholes out there who think that they're either God's gift to women or just have no morels and so they grope.

With these idiots you must set the rules fast and easy for their dumbass to understand. Just tell them 'hey I don't like you touching me like that' accompnyed with a good kick to the groin if they don't listen.This will bring home your messge loud and clear to them.
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Lady_vixen
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Post by Lady_vixen »

LMAO, I never in my life thought I would see a guy say
a good kick to the groin if they don't listen
I love it. Killjoy, I am so not making fun of you. Just surprised that you feel that way too.
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killjoy
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Post by killjoy »

Lady_vixen wrote:LMAO, I never in my life thought I would see a guy say
a good kick to the groin if they don't listen
I love it. Killjoy, I am so not making fun of you. Just surprised that you feel that way too.
*Shruggs* What can I say?

I was raised in a house where manners were harped on big time. How one acts in public, how one acts at the dinner table and much other things.But the one thing my father was big about was teaching on how a man treats a lady.

I was raised to always hold the door, give up my seat, say yes ma'am and never ever under any circumstance what so ever to lay my hand on a woman in anger (which I wouldn't have done to began with anyway.)
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