Roswell Fanatics

TURN OFF THE LIGHT



Title: Turn Off The Light
Author: Melissa aka Aliensister
Disclaimer: The characters of "Roswell" belong to Jason Katims, Melinda Metz, WB and UPN. Not mine and no infringement is intended.
Pairings/Couples/Category: A/I with minor M/L, M/M and K/OC
Rating: Adult for language, domestic abuse, an almost sexual assault and smut.
Summary:Isabel is an Enigma full of dark secrets. Could Alex be her beacon of light through the darkness?

* This is the rewritten version of Turn off the light which I began writing two years ago and I let it die but I reviewed it and have picked it back up again but this time I know what I am doing. The title is from the song Turn off the light by Nelly Furtado and as with any author feedback encourages me to write faster *evil smile* lol. I’d like thank faithlee (babylisou -Ann) for the wonderful banner she made me when I first started this story and to Rosdude for the current banner that is up right now and jeja911 for being my lovely beta, you’re a doll!


Chapter 1

Isabel walked into the school wearing her usual daggy black low-riding khakis that showed off the A on the small of her back with large angel wings spreading from either side of the A to her each of her hips and her tight black wife beater, her little red dragon tattoo peeking out from the strap of her wife beater as well as the usual accessories thick leather studded belt and studded bracelets to match and usual jewellery nose, tongue and left eyebrow rings.

With Isabel’s hair she made quite a picture in contradictions with her grungy punk style, tattoos and piercings and her mane of preppy blonde hair that reached half way down her back but for school was tied back in a sloppy bun at the nape of her neck. Her worn out combat boots scuffing the ground as she rounded the corner only to be knocked to her ass when she ran into someone coming the other way

"Dickhead!, I’m gonna kick your ass....."Isabel muttered until she saw who it was she had been knocked to the ground by. There in front of her sat a slightly disheveled Alex Whitman tall, sort of lanky Alex Whitman, wearing a dark blue button down shirt with all the buttons done up, a pair of dark blue jeans with chain going from his belt to his back pocket, skater shoes and his chocolate brown hair sort of gelled into spikes on top of his head.

"Oh shit sorry Isabel, I just wasn't looking where I was going” Alex said reaching out his hand to help Isabel up after he had jumped up.

"Yeah well I noticed that when I was knocked to my ass "said Isabel sarcastically, refusing Alex's hand to get up, Isabel started to dust the dirt off herself while sneaking glances at Alex as he too began to dust himself off, checking him from head to toe and then scolded herself for her thoughts as they began to fly south for the winter.

You see Isabel was that little boy in 2nd grade that kept bullying that little girl because he liked her and to Isabel, Alex was that little girl (not that she thinks of Alex as a little girl, far from it!) that she so desperately like but is unable to show it. Isabel winced in pain as she bent over to brush the dirt off her pants.

"Are you ok, Isabel?" Alex asked when he saw her wince.

"I'm fine dweeb, now if you'll excuse me I have better things to be doing with my time” she said with a nasty parting smile, she began to stalk away but not before Alex could grab her arm and swing her around so she faced him.

"Isabel, if your not...ok you can tell me, I‘m here if you need me” Alex said his face a mirror of concern, concern for her, Isabel was beginning to melt but shook it off as she forced herself back to reality, letting Alex in just wasn’t an option. Isabel pulled her arm free of Alex’s gentle grip that had left Isabel’s skin tingling where he had touched and began walking off but stopped a couple off feet away from Alex and turned back to look into Alex’s eyes with an apologetic stare, quietly saying "Your better off not knowing Alex". Turning again Isabel walked away from Alex and headed for the Ladies room.

Locking the cubicle door, Isabel leant against the back of the cubicle door lifting up her black wife beater Isabel sighed sorrowfully and stared at the deep purple bruise that started from her left hip and ended just below her left breast.

"Ah another Hank Guerin original” Isabel tried to say sarcastically but it came out all choked up as her tears overflowed and slid down her cheeks leaving their salty tracks down her face.

"Oh Alex it doesn't matter how much I want to tell you, your just better off not knowing, your safer that way” Isabel whispered, lifting her hand Isabel wiped more overflowing tears from the tops of her cheeks. Gingerly Isabel put the toilet seat down and sat down.

Why was life so hard? Why did every step Isabel took have to be marred with complications? With a sigh Isabel placed her head in her hands, elbows rested on her knees. The bathroom door banged signaling someone’s entrance, Isabel didn’t move pretending to not be there. The door banged again and a conversation began.

“Rena have you seen Liz?” Said a voice Isabel recognized to be Maria Deluca, Michael’s on-again off-again girlfriend before he and Max had left and Kyle Valenti’s step sister, Kyle was Isabel’s best friend now that Max and Michael were gone but before that Kyle had been best friend to all of them and only he and Maria knew of their abuse by their step father.

“Um, yep Alex pulled her away about five minutes ago, just before I came in her actually” Said Rena, Alex’s cousin. Isabel wondered what Alex had wanted Liz for, was it about her, about their conversation? Isabel shook her head at her own paranoia Liz Whitman was Alex’s little sister, Alex could have wanted her for anything, maybe she forgot to wash the dishes and he was going to rag on her for it, like Michael has always done to Isabel.

“What did Alex want Liz for?” Maria asked echoing Isabel’s question and suspicion and was met with silence with Isabel guessed meant Serena had shrugged. Maria and Serena finished doing whatever is was that they were doing, probably reapplying their make-up or something like that and left the bathroom with another bang of the door, leaving Isabel alone again.

In the music room Alex and Liz sat discussing Isabel.

“She said I was better off not knowing Liz, what if something really bad is happening to her?” Alex said pacing in front of the desk that Liz sat on contemplating, legs crossed, her brows furrowed in concentration and her hands in prayer pose beneath her chin.

“Yeah I have seen her acting pretty weird but Alex you can’t make her tell you what’s going on, I mean she didn’t tell you she had a four year old daughter did she?” Liz said hitting Alex with truth that Isabel and he weren’t that close and instantly regretted it after seeing Alex’s face fall in sadness.

“Sorry Alex but you know it’s the truth” Liz said softly and Alex just nodded.

“I don’t care Liz, if something is going on I am going to find out and…” Alex trailed off not exactly sure what he would do about it, if he found out that there was something going on.

“I can’t bare the thought that someone could hurt someone as amazing and as beautiful as Isabel Evans” Despite the heaviness of the conversation Liz still smiled, Alex’s love for Isabel had always warmed her true-to-love-heart even though she realized Alex didn’t know Isabel that well, she knew that he loved Isabel.

Liz had supported him because thanks to Alex, Liz had seen a glimpse of the real Isabel that Alex saw and that made Liz think that Isabel was probably a real good person. Liz just worried in Isabel’s need to hold onto her tough girl act, Isabel may hurt Alex.

“Well what are you going to do?” Liz asked ready to help Alex in anyway possible. Alex came to a stop in front of Liz with a frown on his face.

“I’m not quite sure yet but maybe you could ask Maria about Isabel, I mean Kyle is her best friend and you could say your asking because you think my obsession with Isabel is unhealthy” Alex suggests with a goofy smile.

“And I just want to make sure Isabel is a nice person” Liz said catching Alex’s line of thought, frowning Liz continued.

“But I’m not so sure I like lying to Maria, why can’t we just tell her I mean she could go to Kyle and they could help, no one would want Isabel to be hurt, especially not her” Alex shook his head at Liz.

“We can’t because if Isabel finds out we suspect something she will shut down further and we’ll never find anything out, she’s too private” Although Liz didn’t want to lie to Maria, she did have to agree Isabel was an extremely private person.


The first bell rang, signaling the beginning of school. In the girls bathroom Isabel stood up carefully so not to aggravate her bruised side, well aggravate it more than it was already, seeing as just breathing was a pain in the ass at the moment. Walking out of the stall Isabel paused to check her self in the mirror, reminding herself just why it was she put up with all the abuse, reaching her hand into her pocket Isabel rubbed her fingers over the plastic covered photo of her four year old daughter.

Pulling herself up to her full height, Isabel pulled up her walls, the walls that made everyone stay away from her, nobody messed with Isabel Evans, she was a nasty Ice Bitch and Isabel was glad of it. If nobody got close, nobody got hurt, herself and Amelia included.

Pulling the bathroom door open with a jerk, Isabel stepped into the fray of student bodies in varying degrees of rush to get to class and like many of them Isabel just calmly walked not in any hurry. Passing her locker Isabel stopped to grab her books, though Isabel was always late, upholding her school punk status, she had an A grade point average, Isabel was smart, a photographic memory and was topping most of her classes.

The halls were clear when Isabel finally walked into her English class, the tall thin brunette only giving her an annoyed glance and indicated for her to take a seat. Isabel walked to the back left hand corner and was regarded with a wiggle of eyebrows and cheeky grin by Kyle, implying that she was late because she had been off somewhere having some hanky panky, even though Kyle knew Isabel wasn’t like that at all.

Isabel looked up to the front of the class, checking the teacher was facing the away from them and without taking her gaze off the teacher Isabel, reached her arm out and smacked Kyle around the back of the head with a resounding thwack that was heard all over the class. The teacher glanced over her shoulder at the class, narrowing in on Isabel. Isabel gave her an innocent smile and the teacher turned back to the black board looking slightly disgruntled.

“Ow!” Kyle whispered, pouting.

“Don’t be such a whimp” Isabel whispered back rolling her eyes. Isabel looked up to the black board and began writing out the assignment there.

“So you gonna tell me what happened last night?” Kyle said implying to Isabel sneaking her and Amelia into his room at four o’clock in the morning. Pausing, Isabel took a breath and began writing again.

“Not the place Kyle” Isabel warned harshly, not even taking her eyes off her work. “So drop it” Isabel said her tone told Kyle it wasn’t up for discussion, this conversation topic was closed. For now, thought Kyle.

“Miss Evans, Mister Valenti, I suggest you zip it or you will be spending you afternoon with me” The teacher warned sitting down at her desk. Isabel tuned her head to shoot daggers at Kyle who shrugged and mouthed sor-ry back to her.

The rest of the period was uneventful, as was the rest of the day until Isabel’s last class which she shared with Kyle, Alex and Serena. Political Science, Isabel’s favourite class, Isabel wanted to be a social worker once she finished school so maybe she could help other kids in the situation Max and herself were and had been in they were six and Michael, who has hanks son had been in since he could remember.

Even though this was her favourite class Isabel had never wished to be out the class as much as she did right now. Since they had entered the room, Alex hadn’t taken his eyes off her and it was making Isabel extremely uncomfortable. Alex stared at her like he could see right into her soul and it had her unnerved.

The heat from his gaze was almost enough to make Isabel blush and at that thought Isabel got cranky, no one was going to make Isabel Evans blush, she wasn’t going to let him see that he was getting to her. For the first time since entering the class Isabel lifted her eyes to meet Alex’s deep, penetrating gaze and gave him the most pissed off stare she give.

Alex, seeing Isabel’s stare merely lifted an eyebrow, in curiosity and a smile began to tug at one side of his mouth. After talking to Liz at lunch Kyle found out that whatever secret Isabel was hiding Maria knew it but wasn’t saying, which obviously meant Kyle knew as well. From where he had been sitting Alex was able to see Isabel and Kyle having their lunch and engaging in an obviously heated but hushed conversation.

After being friends with Maria, the busy body, Liz had picked up on some of the tricks of the trade of snooping. Liz had picked up a few words of Kyle and Isabel’s conversation and while maybe Alex should have felt guilty spying on Isabel but after what Liz had told him, he knew there was something or someone was hurting Isabel and if Kyle and Maria weren’t going to anything about it, Alex was.

Alex may be known as the sweet guy but when it came his friends and family Alex was fiercely protective and though Isabel may not like him like that, he loved her and he would do anything to make sure she was ok and if Alex had to play games and play an asshole to get into Isabel’s head, Alex would.

Alex couldn’t believe how flustered Isabel was getting under his gaze, Isabel was still glaring at him and even though she was desperately trying not show it, he could see her getting flustered but not out of anger, Alex had watched her since year five and he knew her expression, the movements she made when she happy, when she sad like when Max and Michael had left but more then that he knew when she was mad and she wasn’t really mad, this was covering.

Alex’s cocky grin slid for a moment when it occurred to him that while he knew Isabel’s emotions, he had only started noticing something wrong about 8months ago. He had waited thinking maybe whatever it was, wasn’t that bad but Alex wasn’t going to wait anymore, he wanted it to be ok for Isabel and he would move heaven and hell to see it happen.

TBC...Till next week, same bat time, same bat channel ( I hope to post once a week.) and Feedback...please! *tries not to whine*

Hey guys back again with chapter two
Sternbetrachter- I'm glad you remember it
Stargazer's Delight- Well I'm glad you liked it but while the same name and the first chapter are all most the same thats the only things that are alike, I went back over the story and totally rewrote it, I wasn't able to finish it the way it was because it had no plot and it didn't make much sense. I really hope your not too dissappointed with the new story.
KarenEvans- Ta, Karen I hope you actually read it cause it was kinda different hugs chika


Without further adu

////~~~PART 2~~~////


WARNING: The following contains an adult situation that may be offensive in nature... if sexual violence is not your thing, you will not want to read the contents.


Isabel walked up the stairs that led to the pathetic excuse for an apartment that she’d lived in with her mother Diane Guerin and stepfather Hank Guerin. Unlocking the front door she stepped into the small lounge room that was furnished with two small mustard colored couches and an old worn-out brown leather lazy-boy with a hole in the headrest that had been covered by duck-tape and it was placed in front of the black and white television.



They had a color television once but in one of Hank's alcohol included fits of rage he had put his foot through it! She could hear her mother rustling in the kitchen, cleaning the mess of alcohol and broken plates and glasses after the little “session” last night. Her mother finally came out of the kitchen with a black garbage bag in her hand and a black eye that had graced her face thanks to Hank.

“Hey baby.” Diane said softly, speaking like the small mild- mannered woman she had become, after having her fire punched, kicked, beaten out of her by Hank Guerin.



“How are you feeling?” She said concerned, looking over her daughter, looking for the damage she knew Hank had caused last night.


“Oh um…..like someone kicked the crap out of me. Oh! Wait, that actually happened." Isabel replied icily, rolling her eyes at her concern.

“I told you to just stay away from him when he’s like that.” Diane said trying to defend and redeem herself in some small way.

“It’s been working really well for you, hasn’t it?” Isabel said as she grabbed her mother’s chin to take a closer look at her black eye that had her mother's eye nearly swollen shut and the cut on her cheek where he had back handed her and the bulky tarnished gold class ring had cut her.

“Oh mum why do you stay with him?” Isabel said sadly, shaking her head in pity for her mother.

“Cause I love him and underneath he’s really a good person” Diane said reassuring herself as she planted a kiss on her daughter’s forehead.


“Really.” she insisted firmly and Diane went back to cleaning, as Isabel went to her room. Isabel only had half an hour till Kyle came back to get her and she needed some thing for her and Amelia to live off of for the next couple of days. This was the cycle she lived in since she was young, get beaten and leave for about a week while he went on his bender and then come home for a couple of weeks while Hank was on his best behavior, telling everyone he had given up drinking until one day when got pissed and the cycle began all over.



Closing the bedroom door behind her Isabel went for the duffle bag that she kept half packed at all times, so should she need to all she would need is to grab a few small things and Amelia and her were out of there. Lifting the bag onto top of the sofa-bed her and Amelia shared, Isabel's eyes were drawn to the picture of Michael, Max, Amelia and herself that sat on her bedside table.



Taken about a year ago when Max had graduated early, her mother had wanted to go but Hank had chucked a fit and smashed her face up pretty bad and she didn’t show and though Isabel knew it had upset Max, she knew he was happy that the important people in his family were there.



Grabbing the photo Isabel wrapped it in one of her jumpers and placed it carefully in the bag. Walking around her room, Isabel picked up the other things she needed and hid the photos and breakables that adorned her dressing table and chest of drawers, Hank had been known to trash her and the boys' room when they ran away.



Isabel was about to zip the bag when her eye caught sight of Amelia’s Elmo chicken doll, taking Elmo into her arms Isabel sat on the bed and began to play with the fur of the small monster in a chicken suit. Isabel began to reminisce about how her tiny little daughter Amelia came about. Nearly five years ago Diane Guerin had fallen pregnant with Hank's baby. Diane didn’t want any more kids and she knew Hank didn’t want the kids they had let alone another one.



When Diane found out she had been five months gone and abortion wasn’t an option, Diane had began to think about adoption but Isabel put a nix on that idea quicker than Diane could say adoption. Isabel could be very forceful when she wanted to be. This was a little girl, a little sister, her little sister! There was no way she could let her mother give her away.



//Flash back//

Isabel had cornered her mother in the lounge room

“How can you do this!” Isabel shouted

“I don’t want it.” Diane said trying to remain calm

“Its not an ‘it’ she’s a baby with a heart beat and a brain and 10 little fingers and toes” Isabel seethed

“You don’t understand, I don’t want it!” Diane yelled



“No, you're right. I don’t understand explain it to me!”

“ I can't, it wants it's mother, I j…”

“You are it's mother! It’s growing inside of you!”

“No Isabel. I’m an incubation pod, a mother is someone who loves, cares and nurtures the child. I can’t be it's mother. Your father, oh god your father was my soul mate and I may love hank but I don’t want to be the mother of his children!” Diane said sobbing as she sank to the floor

“Then give her to me.” Isabel said strongly

“What? No! You’re only 14 and baby you’re smart you have a…. a future, oh baby you could have such a bright future.”


“I can handle it. Max and Michael will help me.” and like the weak woman Diane had become she gave in.

“I won’t help, I want nothing to do with it.” Diane said meekly.

“Fine.”



“You’re really going to do this, aren’t you?” Diane looked up at Isabel. Crouching down, Isabel answered her mother.



“Yes.” she said determinedly

//End flash back//



Isabel already had two brothers, Michael Guerin (Hank's only son) and Isabel’s twin brother Maxwell Evans. Max, Isabel and their parents Philip and Diane lived in Roswell until they were 5 when their father died in a fire, leading Diane to drink and drink, until she became an alcoholic. While in a bar in Las Cruses Diane met Hank, they married two months later and Diane moved Max and Isabel to Las Cruces to live with Hank and Michael.





It didn’t take long for Max, Michael and Isabel to bond and become really close. Abuse has the ability to bring people closer, forging bonds against a common enemy that will last you a lifetime even if you never saw that person again and this is how it was for Max, Michael and Isabel, they became a family all on their own, no parents allowed.



Isabel had been the youngest of the three and the boys had always protected her from Hank, getting in his face when he was about to go after her, diverting his attention. Maybe Isabel had been selfish to keep Amelia but from the moment she held that tiny little baby in her arms and Amelia wrapped her hand around Isabel’s finger, she no longer cared that she wasn’t her biological mother; she was going to be Amelia’s mom.



On Amelia’s birth certificate they had wrote Isabel as her mother and the father was not known. Very few people knew the truth and that’s the way it was going to stay. Coming out of her memories Isabel realized that Kyle would be there to pick her up shortly and she needed to be out front waiting for him. Grabbing the black duffle, Isabel headed for the front door when it suddenly opened and a very drunk Hank Guerin swaggered in, slamming it behind him.



“Well, well, well what do we have here?” Hank slurred staring at Isabel and the duffle bag in her hand.



“The little whore wouldn’t be on the run now would she?” He said drunkenly sneering at her in scorn.



“Fuck off, Hank!” Isabel said trying to keep her face calm, after all the beatings she took; she still felt a small tremor of terror at his face coming towards her, even though as she got older the tremor got smaller but it was still there. Isabel tried to push past him to get outside but Hank grabbed her arm and threw her back and she landed against the wall. Her ribs began to throb not even given a chance to heal since last night.



“And where’s that bastard child of yours?” Hank said closing the gap between them, grasping Isabel’s arms so tight there would be bruises in the morning.



“Hank, come on, please…leave her alone, just let her leave!” Diane began to beg, already misting up knowing what was about to happen. Diane moved to stand beside them with her hand over Hank’s trying to get him to release Isabel from his grip.



Diane desperately began trying to pry Hank’s fingers away from Isabel’s now bruised flesh. Letting the arm free that Diane was trying to free, Hank shook off Diane’s hand and she began to move between Isabel and him, making him even angrier. Reaching up Hank grabbed a chunk of Diane’s hair in one and held Isabel in place with other.



“How many times, do I have to tell you not to get in my way woman?” Hank yelled into Diane’s face exasperated and with a yank threw her across the room. Diane didn’t move at all after she landed and it made Isabel fear that she never would again. Isabel’s eyes were wide with horror and fear at the man who stood there with a smug smile at the pain he had just cause Diane.



“Now, where was I?” Hank said sarcastically, turning back to Isabel.



“Oh, yeah I remember now!” Hank said faking enthusiasm, in his eyes was an evil glint Isabel had never seen before; she was petrified, almost shaking.



“I was talking to my new friend Billy down at the bar, telling him all about my miserable bitch of a step-daughter and her bastard child…”



“Aw how charming you thought about me when you were out” Isabel said sarcastically trying to fix her Ice Queen mask back in place but as soon as the words left her mouth, Hank lifted his hand and slapped Isabel so hard her face snapped to the side and she tasted blood where he had caused her to bite her tongue.



“He called you a slut and I mean to be pregnant at 14….You are a slut!” Hank whispered, running his hand softly down the cheek he just slapped as if he had just discovered a new toy. Isabel felt like she had just been doused in icy cold water at the way Hank trailed his fingers over her cheek and down her neck, rubbing her collarbone. Isabel’s insides were quivering and crying inside, begging him not do this, but not a tear or word showed on Isabel’s face. Her face remained impassive, like she had no bearing on what was going on right in front of her.



Hank’s hand moved from her collarbone and roughly grabbed her left breast, squeezing it from outside her shirt. Leaning forward Hank drunkenly kissed Isabel’s neck, Isabel could smell the foul odor of alcohol radiating off Hank as he groped her and panted in her ear.



“Living in my house for so long, eating the food I paid for, using my electricity, you deserve this you little slut.” Hank slurred as he began kissing her neck again. Isabel’s lip began to tremble but she made no sound. Hank’s hand slid to the waistband of her khakis and Isabel hissed out her breath in fear and loathing for the man who was about to forcibly take her virginity. Hank however took the hiss as one of pleasure.



“I knew you’d like this, whore” Hank said sliding his fingers to the button of Isabel’s pants. Isabel turned her head to the side, trying to pretend that she wasn’t there, that this wasn’t happening and that Hank wasn’t about to rape her. Hank slid the leather of Isabel’s belt through the silver buckle.



As Isabel looked away her eyes were caught on the pair of dress making scissors that her mother had obviously left on the small table that was just beside Isabel. Isabel heard the button of her pants snap open under Hank’s violating fingers and Isabel’s fingers wrapped around the middle of the large silver scissors.



The sound of Isabel’s zipper being lowered filled the silent room. Isabel looked straight ahead, not blinking. Her eyes held a look of vacancy but underneath the surface Isabel’s mind ran a mile a minute. Hank’s fingers grasped the elastic of her panties as Isabel snapped. With the scissors, Isabel stabbed Hank straight into his side. Hank’s head shot up, his eyes filled with horror at the bloody pair of scissors that had been pulled back out of him when he had moved back.



“You little bitch!” Hank screamed and charged at her.



Isabel had the scissors held up in front of her, still in shock that she had stabbed him the first time when Hank was pushed upon the scissors again. Isabel’s wide eyes stared into Hanks, both were petrified, Hank because he was bleeding to death and Isabel because she had just stabbed a man, twice.



Hank stumbled back from Isabel, who looked down at her blood stained, trembling hands as she began to sink to floor. Hank’s shirt, once white was now red. Hank’s legs came out from underneath him and he fell to the floor gasping, like it was taking every bit of energy just to breathe.

////~~~ Chapter 3 ~~~////- Sorry this is a bit late...


Kyle had been waiting for nearly fifteen minutes, parked outside Isabel’s apartment building. Isabel wasn’t exactly a strictler when it came to being on time but she it was usually only by a few minutes not by fifteen minutes. Kyle had stepped out of the car after five minutes and leaned against the car at seven minutes and had began to pace after ten minutes and now, here he was at fifteen minutes checking his watch again.

“Ok that’s it, I’m going up to check what’s going on” Kyle mumbled to himself as he jogged to the stairs which he took two at a time heading all the way up to the fourth floor.
With a groan Diane came around and gingerly sat up, trying to ignore the dizziness that threatened to take her back into the dark of her passed out state. Diane moved to her hands to her head to try and stop her head from moving. Slowly she opened her eyes and quickly closed them again as she saw the picture in front of her. Isabel sat crouched against the wall with blood up to her elbows and all over the front of her. Hank lay barely breathing about a foot away from Diane and 3feet from Isabel.

“Oh god” Diane whispered and Isabel’s head shot up, looking like a deer caught in someone’s headlights.

“I didn’t mean too, I just wanted him to stop but he just kept touching me, he was going to rape me” Isabel pleaded to herself with a whine. Isabel was pale as a ghost, making the slap Hank had given her stand out like a sore thumb. Diane couldn’t move paralyzed by fear and disgust, her daughter had just stabbed her partner, the partner who had bashed herself and her children and had just tried to rape her daughter.

Diane was filled with self loathing her baby boy and Michael, the young boy who had stolen Diane’s heart, who she would always think of her son had both been driven out of their home due to Hank and Isabel would of left too had it not been for Amelia, Isabel had wanted to finish school. Now Isabel had nearly been raped and had ended up stabbing someone. It’s all my fault, I did this, I let this happen Diane thought to herself.

“I’m so sorry Philip” Diane whispered to herself, hoping that her late husband would forgive her for screwing up their children.

Kyle reached the front door of the apartment and hesitated a second before grabbing the spare key from under the door mat, he didn’t bother to knock. Kyle rushed in and paused, staring at the three people all covered in blood. Gently closing the door behind him, Kyle braced himself against the door; blood had always made him squeamish.

“Aww, shit!” Kyle said closing his eyes.

“Kyle, Kyle you need to get Isabel out of here” Diane said getting up of the floor. Kyle walked over to Isabel who was still staring at Hank’s bleeding body. Diane walked over to the wall between the lounge room and kitchen and picked up the receiver of the phone that hung on the wall.
Kyle helped Isabel stand up and leaned her against the lounge that wasn’t far from where she was sitting. Kyle ignored the blood as he moved over to Hank, apprehensive of touching the man that had beaten his best friends most of their lives. Placing two fingers on Hank’s neck Kyle looked up to Diane who stood with the phone in her hands.

“It’s weak but its there” Kyle said nodding to Diane, who began to dial a three digit number

“Hello, I need an ambulance I just stabbed my husband….flat 4b number 39 Caracul’s avenue” Diane hung up the phone and turned to stare at Hank.

“You were never here Isabel” She said not taking her eyes off Hank.

“Kyle wrap that blanket around her and take her away from here, I’ll tell the police he tried to rape me” Diane said the last part of the sentence with sob, that had Kyle looking between Isabel and Diane questionably.

Diane moved around the room, grabbing the blanket of the lounge and walked over to Isabel.

“I’m so sorry, can you tell Max and Michael and Amelia too” Diane murmured, tears began to fall from her eyes when she noticed Isabel’s opened fly. Pulling her up, Diane did Isabel’s pants up and smoothed her hair that had fallen out of her pony tail back; Diane wrapped her up in the dark blue and green woolen blanket.

“Take her out of here Kyle” Diane said leading Isabel who still hadn’t said a word over to Kyle. Kyle nodded and gave a brief smile to Diane for finally being there for her child even if it was way over due.

Kyle closed the door behind them and placed an arm around Isabel’s shoulders to guide her down the stairs. They got into the car just as the blue flashing lights of the police and ambulance’s pulled up behind them. Kyle tried desperately not to panic and started the engine, his gaze only leaving the police in his rear view mirror for a moment so he could pull out into the road.

The lights got smaller and smaller until Kyle could no longer see them and he finally let out the breathe he didn’t know he had been holding. Reaching his arm out he stroked Isabel’s hair, still watching the road.

“We’ll be ok now Izzy” He murmured trying to reassure them both.

Kyle turned the radio on very softly trying to dissipate the silence that filled the car, making him nervous.


You sit there in your heartache
waiting on some beautiful boy to
To save you from your old ways
You play forgiveness
Watch it now ... here he comes!

He doesn't look a thing like Jesus
But he talks like a gentleman
Like you imagined when you were young

Can we climb this mountain
I don't know
Higher now than ever before
I know we can make it if we take it slow
Let's take it easy
Easy now, watch it go

We're burning down the highway skyline
On the back of a hurricane that started turning
When you were young
When you were young

And sometimes you close your eyes
and see the place where you used to live
When you were young

They say the devil's water, it ain't so sweet
You don't have to drink right now
But you can dip your feet
Every once in a little while

You sit there in your heartache
Waiting on some beautiful boy to
To save you from your old ways
You play forgiveness
Watch it now here he comes

He doesn't look a thing like Jesus
But he talks like a gentleman
Like you imagined when you were young
(He talks like a gentlemen, like you imagined when)
When you were young

I said he doesn't look a thing like Jesus
He doesn't look a thing like Jesus
But more than you'll ever know

Kyle’s blue and white striped 1970 ford mustang pulled into the driveway of the Red cement house owned by his father and Amy his hippy step mother. Amy knew the very basics of what happened to Max, Michael and Isabel but had promised not to say anything because she had been a child of foster care and knew what the system was like and she knew that due to her police record and that her and Jim’s salary had not been very big, they would not have let them foster all three of the kids and Amy couldn’t bare to be the one to separate them.
Jim didn’t know anything only that Max, Michael and Isabel and then Amelia spent a hell of a lot of time at his house but he loved them all so he didn’t mind. Jim was a singer in his own country music band that had struck it big a couple of years ago and so he spent even less time at home then he did when he was trying to get famous.

Kyle pulled the keys out of the ignition and turned to face Isabel who still hadn’t moved from when he put her in the car, she just sat staring out the windscreen.

“I’m going to go and check that its all clear and then I’ll come back for you”

Kyle jumped out of the car and ran into the house where Amy, Maria and Amelia were playing in the kitchen. Amy looked up and was about to tell Maria and Amelia when Kyle put a finger to his lips and signaled her to be quiet and to come out into the lounge room. When Amy got up and went a curious look passed between Maria and Amy but Maria said nothing.

“What’s a matter Kyle? Where is Isabel?” Amy asked softly seeing that Kyle was on edge.

“We need to get Amelia to go into Maria’s room, something’s happened and I don’t want her to see Isabel” Kyle swallowed back tears as her thought of the small, frail girl covered in blood that sat in his car out front.

“Oh god did Hank hurt her again…” Amy said angrily, she may have promised her silence but it didn’t stop her from being pissed off at the situation. Kyle half shook his head and looked guilty.

“Ok, go get her and I’ll send them into Maria’s room” Amy said leading Kyle towards the door. Amy was a house wife and when Amelia was born had taken to being her babysitter so Isabel would finish school.

As soon as Kyle closed the door Amy moved into the Kitchen ushering Maria and Amelia into the bedroom with urgency pausing only to whisper something had happened to Isabel in Maria’s ear before shutting them in Maria’s bedroom.

Amy heard the front door close and she rushed up the hall into the lounge room. Kyle removed the blanket as Amy walked into the room. Amy covered her mouth with her hand at the sight of Isabel covered in blood, she took only a second before rushing over to Isabel.

“Is any of it her blood?” Amy said checking Isabel over.

“I don’t think so, Hank was on the floor, bleeding, I…I’m pretty sure that it’s all his blood mom, Isabel stabbed him” Amy wanted to cry for all the shit that poor Isabel had been put through to have led to this moment. Kyle pulled Amy away from the comatose Isabel who just stood there, not seeing.
“Mom, I think she was raped or Hank was about to when she stabbed him” Amy gasped sadly and closed her eyes to deter herself from crying. She needed to look after Isabel before any remorse could be aloud to spill.

“Did you just leave him there?” Amy asked wanting to know weather or not to clean up Isabel, if the police were going to want to talk to her it may be in her favor to stay the way she was now.

“Diane was there, she’s going to take the rap for her mom” Amy nodded; it was about time that Diane did something for her kids.

Amy’s mind went into over drive, she needed to get Isabel cleaned up and burn those clothes. Amy knew it was wrong to hide a crime but she wasn’t going to watch Isabel go to prison for something that shouldn’t of been a crime when it came to that pig.

“Kyle, go and get Maria, I’m going to need her help and you stay with Amelia” Amy said looking at Isabel.

“No mom I want to stay with Isabel”

“I need Maria to help me get Isabel in the shower and Ami wont stay in there on her own” Kyle sighed in defeat knowing as much as he wanted to help, it was better that Maria helped Amy, with one last look at Isabel Kyle walked into Maria’s bedroom.

Amelia laughed at something Kyle had said as Maria wearily walked into the lounge room, unsure what to expect. Maria pulled in a breath ready to scream when Amy dove at her, putting her hand over Maria’s mouth to silence her daughter’s screams of horror.

“Maria, you need to calm down, I need you to help me get her clean up…come one baby” Amy murmured into Maria’s ear as Maria continued her panic attack.

“Breathe” and Maria did, finally.

Maria nodded trying to calm herself as she stopped screaming, Maria started to look at Isabel who didn’t move at all, like she hadn’t witnessed Maria’s freak out.

“Is she in there?” Maria said weakly. Amy nodded.

“We need to get her into the shower” Amy said as they moved to either side of Isabel.

////~~~ Chapter 4 ~~~////


Liz Whitman hung up the phone with a confused look on her face. Alex raised an eyebrow in question and grabbed the carton of Chinese food from Serena’s hands.

“Hey!” Serena cried and frowned at Alex, who ignored her.

“Maria didn’t pick up her phone,” Liz said perplexed.

“So?” Serena said finally grabbing another carton of food which she held out of Alex’s grasp.

“You don’t know Maria, she never, ever misses a phone call,” Alex said looking curious. Serena just shrugged, she and her parents had just moved back to town after leaving to live in New York when Serena was two. Now they owned a restaurant with her Uncle Jeff, who was her mother’s brother and Liz and Alex’s father. Alexis Whitman had died when Liz was born due to complications.

Liz sighed jumping up to sit on the counter with her older brother and cousin. Alex dug his chop sticks into Serena’s honey chicken, just to annoy her, which he succeeded in when she smacked him on the shoulder and glared at him.

“I hope nothing's happened.” Liz said biting her lip.

“Like what?” Serena said around a mouthful of chicken, Liz just shrugged.

“It’s just so unlike Maria not to answer her phone.” Alex nodded in agreement.

“I’m home kiddos!” Jeff Whitman sung out as he entered the house.

“In the kitchen, dad!” Liz calls and jumps down to hug her dad as he walks into the kitchen.

“You’ll never guess what I saw on the way home.” Jeff said putting down his bag onto the table.

“Aunty Sara and I were going past the apartment block on Caracul’s Avenue, because I had to check up on some deliveries that hadn’t been delivered and anyway it was swarmed with police and ambulance officers and you know your mom Serena, so we just had to stop and see what was going on like the sticky beak she is!” Jeff laughed, going into the fridge, while Liz and Alex shared a worried glance.

“And well we couldn’t see anything but someone said that some woman on the fourth floor had stabbed a guy.”

“Whoa!” Serena said oblivious to her cousin’s worried looks.

“Hey dad, we're going to head upstairs and…” Liz looked at Alex imploringly.

“…watch a movie” Alex finished as he practically dragged a very confused Serena with him while he gave Jeff a nervous smile and rushed off behind them.

Liz stared at Alex after she closed the door to her bedroom.

“It could be pure coincidence.” Liz tried to reason at which Alex just rolled his eyes.

“Oh come on, Isabel being in pain this morning, like she was injured and then Kyle and her conversation this afternoon and then someone’s stabbed in her building, on her floor!” Alex said angrily.

Sighing Liz sat down on the bed where Serena had been watching her cousins.

“So, what are you going to do?” Serena asked curiously.

“Liz, try Maria again” Alex said handing her the phone.

Maria’s cell phone began to ring for the second time.

“Rock, Rock this party, Dance everybody, Make it hot in this party, Don’t stop move your body” The phone sang loudly, vibrating so hard it actually danced around on the table that Maria had sat it on.

Amelia giggled and bopped her head to the ring tone as she continued to play with her Barbie doll. Kyle sat with Amelia on his lap, staring at the phone. 'God I didn’t answer you the first time, why won’t you just fuck off!' Kyle cursed in his head.

“Rock, Rock this party, Dance everybody, Make it hot in this party, Everybody dance now” Kyle angrily grabbed the phone and flipped it open.

“Hello?” Kyle grumbled.

“Uh…Kyle, is Maria there?”

“No!” Kyle said, knowing he was being incredibly rude to Liz but he wasn’t in the mood. Isabel was his best friend and she had just stabbed a man but he couldn’t do anything to make it better and it was frustrating the hell out of him.

“Um…do you know where she is?”

“In the shower.” Technically he wasn’t lying, Kyle thought.

“Oh...Can you get her to call me when she gets out?” and Kyle merely grunted and snapped the phone closed.

“Uncle Kyle, kiss Barbie! You can be her new husband, I can't find my Ken doll.” Amelia shrugged and even as agitated as he was, Kyle still smiled at Amelia and his new ‘wife’.

Liz stared at the phone, astonished at Kyle’s attitude.

“What happened?” Alex asked anxiously and Serena raised her eyebrows curiously.

“It was Kyle and he was really rude” Liz was shocked, she and Kyle had dated back in the freshman year and even when she broke up with him, he had never been that rude.

“Something is definitely going on.” Liz said trying to work it all out, ever the scientist.

“Yeah, but what?” Serena said shaking her head. “I mean, it’s not like you can do anything ‘bout it” and looked ashamed at the hurt on Alex’s face

“Sorry Lex” Alex shook his head.

“No need to be, it’s all true” Alex smiled sadly.

“I think I’m going to go lay down,” Alex said turning and leaving Liz’s room and heading to his own.

“Yo Liz, I didn’t mean to upset him” Serena said looking at Liz, who shook her head sadly.

“Na, its ok. Alex knows it’s the truth but what can he do he really loves Isabel despite everything”

“Isabel Evans would be lucky to ‘ave him if you ask me, I mean how many guys you know that would take on a chick with a kid and want ‘er for more than a rumble in between the sheets?” Serena said with a shrug.

“Isabel seems like a real hard case but I think she’s ok. I mean I’ve seen her a couple of times with Amelia, her daughter, when I’ve been at Maria’s and her brother Max,” Liz trailed off dreamily as she began to think about Max and then realized that Serena was still in the room.

“And Michael.” Liz said blushing.

“Ooh spill Lizzie, who’s Max?” Serena teased.

“Uh Max is just Isabel’s twin brother” Liz said trying to avoid the subject of Max, whom she had a giant crush on since she was 12 and he had been 13.

“Come on Liz, I know yous can do betta than that!” Serena said lying down on Liz’s bed.

“Rena, it doesn’t matter anymore because he’s moved away and it was never like that between us to begin with.” Liz said fidgeting with the corner of her bed spread.

“Ah, but you wanted it to be more, am I right?” Serena said knowingly in her thick New York accent, Liz rolled her eyes.

“So what, it doesn’t matter now.” Liz reaffirmed.

“….So what does he look like?” Serena said after a few minutes silence. Her curiosity had begun getting to her. Liz rolled her eyes with a good natured huff and reached over to pull her yearbook from last year out of the top drawer of her bedside table. When Liz placed the book down onto the bed it opened to a favored page, the page with Max Evans on it. Serena giggled and Liz began to blush.

“Yo cuz, it’s all good, he is a major hottie and if he wasn’t off limits I would so have hit that” Serena said with a wolf whistle, Liz snorted with disbelief.


“Oh, Rena he is most definitely not your type.” Liz said rolling over onto her back to stare at the ceiling.

“He’s studious, smart, he loves science and medicine and he’s such a good guy, he’s the type of guy who would help an old lady across the street” Liz said with swooning sigh.

“Are you sayin’ I ain’t into nice guys?” Serena said indignantly even though deep down Serena agreed with her cousin. She was the kind of girl who needed a little monster in her man. She needed someone who had a sense of humour and who loved sports and she could already tell that this Max Evans was so not her type but she loved to stir her cousin.

“No! That wasn’t what I was saying, I’m…” Liz began to get flustered.

“Don’ stress lil cuz, it’s all good, I was just messin’ witcha!” Serena said with a laugh and reached around to hug Liz. Liz had a habit of sticking her foot in her mouth whenever the topic of Max came up or worse yet was when Max was around. He must have thought her an idiot because he never even talked to Liz, instead just looked at her odd. Oh well, he’s not around anymore, so it doesn’t matter. 'Not like I’ll see him any time soon' thought Liz as she hugged her cousin back.

TBC...

I just wanted to say thanks to everyone who leaves feedback it makes my day Hugs Mel

I want to dedicate this chapter to the matriarch of my family, my Great-Grandmother Annie Longbottom(82years old) who passed away today 1/1/2007 after battling Dementia for the last 6years. I just wanted to thank her for passing down through the women in my family her stubborness and passion for life, love and family.

////~~~ Chapter 5 ~~~////

Maria closed the bathroom door behind Amy and herself as they ushered Isabel into the small white tiled room. Isabel stared at the wall unseeingly, lost in the deep recesses of her mind. Maria's hands shook as she turned to Amy for direction.

"Help me undress her and then we'll put her in the shower." Amy said with a confidence she didn't feel. Maria could only nod as she turned to the task at hand like she was touching a dead body and in a way she was, thought Amy.

Isabel was out, no one home and Amy couldn't blame her after everything she had been through. Amy stood in front of Isabel, looking into her eyes as she peeled away the undone belt from Isabel's khakis. Amy looked for a sign of life as she and Maria went about pulling black tank top over her head. Nothing, Amy let out a worried sigh. She wanted to scream and cry and hit someone, Hank preferably and she wanted Isabel to want that as well, anything but this silence.

"Leave her bra and panties on, Ria" Amy said trying to make this as unobtrusive as possible for Isabel even though Amy doubted Isabel would speak up if she had taken the underwear off. Leaning down Maria lifted each leg to pull of the boots on Isabel's feet. Amy slid down the zipper on Isabel's pants and for a brief moment thought she saw Isabel flinch, a wave of fear flood her eyes but when she looked again Isabel's eyes were glazed over with a blank look.

Isabel stood in nothing but a pair of black cotton panties and plain black bra. Maria looked over to her mother in a panic, when Isabel realized what was going on Maria was going to get her ass served to her on a silver platter, Maria thought with a gulp. This was only temporary soon Isabel would be back to her old self, with all the threats and very occasional kindness towards her, Maria tried to reassure herself.

Amy pulled back the shower curtain and with Maria's help, they moved Isabel into the bath that had a shower in it. Amy pushed gently on Isabel's shoulders till she sat on the floor of the tub. Amy turned to the small electronic panel that was in the wall next the bath and preset the water temperature.

Fat drops of icy cold water pelted onto Isabel's skin and Isabel began to blink. Her eyes wild with fear, uncertain of how she had arrived in the white tiled bath tub with the icy cold water belting her in the face, was this prison? Isabel asked herself.

A warm hand brushed the soaked tendrils of Isabel's hair away from her face and Isabel slightly moved her head to look towards the owner of the hand. Amy warmly smiled at Isabel hoping to reassure her, even just a little bit. Isabel closed her eyes in relief as the hand of the woman who was like a second mother to her stroked her head. Amy gestured for Maria take the clothes and leave the room.

Amy didn't speak she just picked up the faded pink wash cloth that had been on the side of the tub and turning the heat of the water up, warmed the washer. Amy washed her face, like she was wiping a two year olds face and Isabel reveled in the motherly act, craving innocence that had been stripped from her so long ago.

Please, please forgive me,
But I won't be home again.
Maybe someday you'll look up,
And, barely conscious, you'll say to no one:
"Isn't something missing?"

Isabel's shoulders began to shake as Amy's hands move to wash the blood from Isabel's arms. A sob echoed in Isabel's ears and she was shocked when she realized it was her, her eyes that were weeping with hot, wet tears that flowed down her face getting lost in water that flowed from the shower head.

You won't cry for my absence, I know -
You forgot me long ago.
Am I that unimportant...?
Am I so insignificant...?
Isn't something missing?
Isn't someone missing me?

Isabel's chest heaved as she began to sob in earnest, not even allowing her the take a breath before another sob was torn from Isabel's throat. Isabel's throat began to hurt, closing up on her. Silent tears rolled quietly from Amy's eyes as she witnessed Isabel's breakdown. Suddenly like the floodwalls had fallen under the weight of Isabel's guilt she began to pour word after word of apologies.

Even though I'm the sacrifice,
You won't try for me, not now.
Though I'd die to know you love me,
I'm all alone.
Isn't someone missing me?

"I'm sorry, I didn't, I couldn't, he was going to.please, please, please, help, I'm sorry" Isabel pleaded desperately with Amy, grasping hard enough to leave bruises.

Please, please forgive me,
But I won't be home again.
I know what you do to yourself,
I breathe deep and cry out,
"Isn't something missing?
Isn't someone missing me?"

"Oh god, Izzy, sweetheart, no, it's ok, it wasn't your fault." Amy murmured leaning into the tub to taking Isabel into her possessive arms trying to push some of the pain away, her shirt soaking through as Isabel continued to beg and plead for forgiveness.

Even though I'm the sacrifice,
You won't try for me, not now.
Though I'd die to know you love me,
I'm all alone.
Isn't someone missing me?

"Uncle Kyle what's that noise?" Amelia said looking up at Kyle from his lap, her Barbies lay forgotten on the floor, her eyebrows scrunched in curiosity as a cry came from the bathroom. A noise that Kyle recognized to be Isabel's voice and his heart clenched as he looked down at the tiny innocent butterfly that sat in his lap unaware that her mother was in pain, physical, mental and emotional and had possibly just killed a man.

"I'm sure it's nothing." Kyle said plastering a reassuring smile on his face, grabbing the small CD walkman that was Maria's.

"Hey Ami Princess, how about you listen to Aunty Maria's walkman? I know she doesn't usually let you but we won't tell her anyway." Kyle said desperately as another cry came from the bathroom.

Amelia jumped in excitement at the thought of doing something forbidden as any four year old would do. Kyle placed the headphones over Amelia's ears and hugged her tight in his arms trying to block out the cries of pain that Amelia thankfully couldn't hear.

And if I bleed, I'll bleed,
Knowing you don't care.
And if I sleep just to dream of you
I'll wake without you there,
Isn't something missing?
Isn't something...

Maria slid down the kitchen wall; Isabel's bloodied clothing in a black garbage bag that sat beside her. Maria wrapped her arms around her legs as they pressed against her chest and rested her head on her knees and as Isabel cried, Maria began to feel tears of compassion and empathy roll down her face.

Even though I'm the sacrifice,
You won't try for me, not now.
Though I'd die to know you love me,
I'm all alone.
Isn't someone missing me?

Isabel's wails of guilt began to subside and incoherent babbles became more coherent as Amy stroked her back like a mother strokes a young child who has woken up crying after a nightmare, only Isabel's nightmare wasn't one she was going to wake up from.

"I just wanted it to stop." Isabel brokenly whispered as she hung her head.

"I know honey, I know." Amy whispered back, kissing Isabel's forehead.

Amy closed her eyes and rested her head against Isabel's and let the silence wash over them like an old warm blanket.

* The song in this chapter was 'Missing' by Evanescence.

///~~~~ Chapter 6 ~~~~///

Diane sat with her head in her hands, for three hours she had been sat in this interrogation room. It was a green cement walled room, not enough room to swing a cat in, one wall had a mirror on it but Diane had seen enough Law & Order episodes to know that it was no ordinary mirror, on the other side that “Mirror” were cops and the D.A watching her making up their minds on what they were going to charge her with and talking about Hank’s condition.

Diane felt herself with a seething anger she had never felt before ‘the son of a bitch’ she thought to herself

“So is he fuckin’ dead?” Diane called out to the unseen detectives. Diane was conflicted, on the one hand she hoped the dirty bastard was lying cold on a medical examiner’s table but she didn’t want Isabel to have to live with it the rest of her life. She may have been a fucked mother but she knew the type of person Isabel was, the type who would let Hank’s death, no matter that the asshole had tried to rape her, her guilt would eat at her till she did something stupid, sometimes the morals of good people were fucked.

Diane looked at the blood on her hands, like someone would look at their hands if they had just gotten their nails painted. Maybe she should feel bad but she didn’t, she felt guilty as hell that she had let it get this far, she felt angry she hadn’t been the one to actually stab him but she didn’t feel about Hank getting stabbed, she felt the opposite. Diane was rejoicing, for her babies that no longer had to look over their shoulders looking for the man who made their lives a living hell.

Michael, Isabel, Max and Amelia wouldn’t have to deal with him now.

Yesterday, hell even eight hours ago Diane would of sobbed, the man she had loved was hurt and possibly dead but it had all changed the moment she had awoken to see Isabel’s vacant eyes, bloody hands and open pants. Like being splashed icy cold water Diane’s blood had froze in that moment, disgust and hated swam through her veins like venom eating away at all her love for Hank killing it off faster then her mind could process that she had loved a monster who had tried to rape her daughter.

Where was the justice in life? Her children, her babies, the ones she had given birth too and the one she hadn’t had seen no justice before Hank Diane had considered herself a very religious woman but when Philip had died she lost her faith, how could there be a god who would take away a young father who had his whole life ahead of him, who was an amazing husband and an amazing father. If only it had been me…Philip would never of let someone hurt his kids like this, I’m sorry my babies

The door to the interrogation room swung open and in walked a woman with blonde hair pulled into a swinging ponytail high up on her head, if you had seen her in the street you would have known she was a police woman by the hard look on her face and the way she carried herself, behind her walked a tall man with broad shoulders he wore a smile but Diane could tell he was the one to watch if you pissed him off.
"Detectives O'Lachlin and Smith" Said the blonde detective pointing to herself as O'Lachlin. Pulling out a chair O'Lachlin sat on it back to front and Diane had to resist the urge to roll her eyes, obviously O'Lachlin was the "bad guy" and any minute now Smith was going to speak up with a "good guy" speech…
"Ma'am I don't think you realize just how much trouble you're in, now we just want to sit and talk and then you can tell us what happened" ...'something a little like that'

“I don’t think we need to talk about it Smith, she already said she did it” Standing up off the chair O’Lachlin moved around to get up in Diane’s face.

“What? Did you find out he was having an affair, diddling some little trollop” Diane’s eye flashed in anger, beyond pissed. Detective O’Lachlin laughed leaning back so she stood propped against one of the hideous cement walls.

“That was it, wasn’t it? He was fucking someone else so you got into a fight, that’s where you got the bruises on your face and in a jealous rage you grabbed the scissors and decided to teach him a lesson” O’Lachlin said cockily as if she knew everything which only served to piss Diane off more.

“Do my bruises look fresh to you? Surely in your line of work you have had a few bruises, if you had you would know that this” Diane paused angrily pointing to her face “Is over twenty-four hours old, why don’t you go toddle off and check my medical records, this shit was how Hank was! For twelve years I put up with it, broken bones, stitches, bruises… you may also want to check Michael Guerin, Max and Isabel Evans’s record as well, I snapped today and you know what I would do it again that fucking prick had it all coming to it ” Diane ranted.

“Hank was an abusive drunk and he was always drunk” Diane shook her head at the detectives, she knew it wasn’t going to be hard to make them believe it was her that had stabbed Hank.

“Ok well we’re going to need you to tell us the whole story so we can put it in your statement” Detective Smith said poised with pen and paper to write down the incident.

Silence filled the car as Max and Michael roared down the freeway, neither knew what to say to each other. Max’s mother had supposedly just stabbed Michael’s father. The man that had abused them for most of their lives was finally getting some of his medicine but Max couldn’t help but be angry for the way it had been extracted on him. Max felt guilty for being happy that Hank was hurting and that his sister, brother and mother were all hurting as well because of it. Max had taken the call that Diane had made just before the police had arrived to take her in, the phone call and the scene that continued after it replayed in Max’s mind over and over again.

//Flashback//

“Hello, who is it?” Max said as he picked up the phone, knowing it was bad news. Max had felt it in his bones; something bad had happened he had felt an ominous feeling that had chilled him to the bone about fifteen minutes ago. Please let Isabel and Amelia be ok Max silently prayed.

“Max? It’s me…I don’t have long, they’ll be here soon so just listen” Diane said calmly, Max knew by the tone in her voice not to interrupt.

“Hank’s been stabbed, he deserved it. I need you and Michael to come home and look after Isabel. She didn’t mean to do it, Maxie you need to make sure she comes through this, it wasn’t her fault, let her know I love her. I love you all. I have to go, the police are here. It’s my fault and I’m going to tell everyone that, don’t say anything different. I’m sorry sweetheart, tell your brother and sister, for everything” Diane pleaded and then the line went dead.

Max let the phone drop, when his eyes began to burn. His baby sister had stabbed Hank; His mother was going to prison. Max slid down the wall and rested his head in his hands as he began to cry. Could nothing go right for his family? The front door slammed and Max looked up at the entrance of Michael.

“Fuck, what happened this time?” Michael said once again cursing his father.

“How badly is Isabel hurt? He didn’t touch Amelia did he? I’ll kill him if he did!” Michael swore throwing his jacket onto the couch. Max shook his head sadly as he tried to force out the words that had shaken his world and was sure to shake his brother’s as well.

“Isabel stabbed him” Michael’s face went pale and he fought to draw in the air he needed to breathe. Max watched as the emotions flashed across Michael’s face sadness, fear, terror, elation, anger.

“Fuckk!!!” Michael screamed in rage as he turned to the wall and punched out, leaving a hole in the wall.

“This is my fault, I shouldn’t have left, I should have stayed and looked after her” Michael ranted as he angrily ran his fingers through his hair. Max didn’t stop to correct Michael because he part of him felt the same, rationally he knew it had only been a matter of time before someone hurt Hank but never would Max think or wish it was Isabel.

“They won’t send her to jail. I won’t let them, it’s his fault, he deserved this Isabel wouldn’t hurt someone unless he gave her no other choice, I’ll tell them” Michael said as he began to pace.

“They don’t know it was her, Mom said that she did it” Max sighed, how come their lives were always so fucked up. Michael looked at Max in a mixture of confusion and a hopeful wonder.

“She’s taking the blame?” Max nodded

“She said to tell you she was sorry and that she loves us all” Michael felt the tears begin to prickle and he took a deep breath to clear them, now was not the time to let this out. Clenching his jaw Michael looked up at the ceiling.

“We need to go home” Michael nodded and went to grab a bag for their stay as Max did the same.

//End Flashback//

Max sighed again as he stole a quick glance at Michael; who hadn’t said a word since they set out on the road.

“Maxwell stop sighing” Michael angrily muttered, turning in his seat to look at Max.

“What exactly is it you want from me?”

“Tears? That prick doesn’t deserve my tears he has beaten me till I couldn’t see out of my eyes cause they were so swollen and he’s done the same to you and Isabel and not to mention your mother.” Michael ranted

“He fucking deserves it for what he’s done to all, I’m fucking overjoyed that he’s hurt…are you happy now? I am a horrible son” Michael sighed brokenly, leaning back into the chair.

“Thanks” Michael said quietly, knowing that Max had made him yell, to get him to let it out so he didn’t let it completely fuck him up. The only good thing in to happen in Michael’s life was Isabel and Max and he thanked whoever was out there for them everyday.

“Your not and your welcome” Max nodded as they went back to their silence.

TBC

WOOT! finally...I hate that it's taken me so long but finally I have a new chapter to present to you and I hope it appeases you lol Thanx to everyone who reviewed...I'm in a bit of a rush so I can't say my full thanks right now but I wanted everyone to read the new chapter since I'm happy to finally have it....anyway, without further adu!

//Chapter 7//

Isabel couldn't sit still; she had chewed her usually flawless nails to the quick and bitten the skin from around her fingers till they bled at which point Amy had pulled her hands away from her. The house was so quiet that from her place in the study/extra spare room all Isabel could hear in her head was the sound of Hank's voice and it was driving her crazy.

Pacing the room, Isabel pulled on her hair as she ran her fingers through it and chewed on her bottom lip until swelled under her mistreatment. A knock came from the door and Maria entered carrying a plate of sandwiches and a glass full of a brown liquid Isabel assumed was ice tea and ice cubes. Maria's eyes were red and her face puffy as she walked into the room, Isabel tilted her head to the side to watch Maria place the food onto a small wooden chest of drawers.

"Mum sent me up here." Maria trailed off awkwardly, looking at anywhere but at Isabel. Isabel felt a cold chill of rejection at Maria's refusal to talk to her or even look at her, Maria must really hate her now. Before Michael left they had never been friends but Maria had a fearful respect for her. Now Isabel had nothing, she was nothing, she wasn't even raped but she couldn't just get on with it, no she had to go psycho and she had stabbed a man, Maria was probably disgusted with her. Isabel could still feel the warm liquid of Hank's blood as it had soaked into and dried on her arms and even though it had been washed off Isabel still felt dirty; she hugged herself tightly wondering if she would ever feel clean again.

"I made the sandwiches." Maria said with a hitch.

"Um, I'll just go and let you eat or um sleep or you know whatever you want to do." Maria cursed herself again, wishing that she knew what to say but all she could seem to come up with was 'sorry for that scumbag trying to rape you and I'm glad you stabbed him, he had it coming'. Maria wanted to cry at the futility of words after all that Isabel been through today.

She wanted to curse at God for letting all things that Isabel had to deal with in her short lifetime happen to someone as amazing as Isabel. Maria had come to idolize Isabel in the time she had gotten to know her even though Isabel had intimidated her. Maria had seen the way she was with her family, the fierce love she had bestowed upon them, she had always given and never taken from anyone. How many teenagers would be able to take on a baby that wasn't even theirs in the early teens and live with the rumors and ridicule that Isabel had faced at being a 'teenage mum'.

The countless taunts of slut, whore and so many others and just take it all in stride, all because she had loved a little baby who was the product of her mother and a drunk who had abused her nearly all her life. Isabel loved Amelia with all that she was and that was one thing that made Maria hold a begrudging love and respect for Isabel.

Maria shook her head when she realized that she had been standing there just staring at the floor. With a slight shrug she moved towards the door knowing that she had nothing to do or anything that she could say to Isabel that make her feel any better so she should perhaps just leave Isabel.

"Oh Isabel, Max and Michael rang and said they were on their way and that they should be here in about half an hour. It should be great to have them back hey?" Maria said softly but excited, Max and Michael would fix everything.

When Isabel didn't answer her back or show any sign of the elation Maria was feeling or any feeling at all, Maria gave Isabel another attempted half smile as she walked out closing the door behind her. Isabel felt a wave of paralyzing fear wash over her at the thought of facing Max and Michael, they would hate her. Hank gets stabbed by her and their mother gets into trouble for it; thanks to her now they didn't have any parents at all. No matter if they were crap parents in the first place, they had been their parents and now because of her, one was possibly dead and the other was going to prison for it. Isabel resumed her pacing of the room while she continued to panic.

Maria stood outside the bedroom door just standing there, it was so unlike her. Maria had something to say about everything but the one time she needed to say something she was drawing a blank. "I'm sorry Izzy" Maria said quietly before turning and jogging back down the stairs to rejoin her mother back in the kitchen.

Isabel's whole body was tensed with fear, she felt claustrophobic, she couldn't breathe. Isabel needed to be out of this room, needed to be out of this house and needed to be very far away, she couldn't handle the thought of her brothers' faces as they stared at her with a mixture of disgust and anger.

"You deserve this, you little slut!" Isabel whirled around with a gasp and wide eyes, staring into the dark side of the room. She had been so sure he was there but he wasn't.

"Oh god I'm going crazy!" Isabel said, covering her mouth to try and hold the sobs in.

Isabel walked over to the door and pressed her ear against the white painted wood door.

"I should go up and see her." Kyle said as he began to pace, his best friend was just up the stairs and he wanted to go up but he was afraid and it made him mad.

"I don't know what to say to her. I mean what if I say something wrong and end up hurting her or ugh, I just don't know" Maria said quietly, echoing Kyle's feelings from her position in their mother's arms, Amy just nodded for she herself was feeling the same. Tiny feet padded into the kitchen in a pink 'My Little Pony' nightshirt, Amelia's hair was all ruffled from where she had fallen asleep on it.

"Where's my mommy?" Amelia said quietly, the three adults tried to hide their panic, Amelia had always been a mommy's girl and now her mommy couldn't be there to tuck her in they began to worry how Ami would react.

" I'm sorry sweetie, mommy isn't home yet. How about I tuck you back into bed and then you'll see her in the morning." Maria said coming to the rescue, she may not understand how to deal with Isabel but she had been Aunty Ria since Amelia was born and she could handle their sweet Amelia.

"Ok, but she'll be here in the morning?" Amelia asked tiredly wrapping her arms around Maria's neck as Maria picked her up off the floor and headed for the bedroom that had been done up just for Isabel and Amelia since they were practically living there anyway. Maria just nodded, not wanting to promise the little girl anything that she couldn't come through with.

Isabel hid against the dark green wall listening to her little girl talk sleepily to Maria; as Maria tucked her into to bed, about how much she loved her mommy; Isabel leaned her head against the wall as a fat salty tear ran down her cheek.

"Your mommy's a murderer." Isabel whispered, her heart breaking at the events that had taken place in the last twenty-four hours, now her shitty life had snowballed her into a killer. Isabel looked up and straight into Kyle's room and his window, the same window they had used to sneak in and out of before Amy had found out about Hank. She wouldn't be gone long, Isabel promised herself, she wasn't going to abandon her family but she needed time to think things through so when she saw Max and Michael she could take the accusing glares and maybe she could try and sort through the storm of thoughts and feelings that had her heart, head and her conscience warring.

Isabel crept through the room and out the open window and with one last look around, Isabel ran through the back gate, heading out into the cold cloudy night.

Alex let out a frustrated sigh and rubbed his eyes as he once again tried to read the same passage he had been trying to read for the last twenty minutes. Alex had pulled out the book and climbed into bed and tried not to think about Isabel Evans and just like every other time he had tried to not think about her, it hadn't worked. Alex knew he was insane and maybe just a little bit pathetic, in love with a woman who couldn't stand to be around him. Alex sighed again and laid the book on the bed beside him.

Ten fifty-five flashed in bold red numbers on the clock on his bedside table and rain had just begun to shower down on his window but Alex was keyed up with too many thoughts running through his head to even think of sleeping. Alex hopped up out of bed and began to walk out the door when his eyes caught sight of his car keys sitting on his computer desk. Alex suddenly had this need to be out of the house, his dad would probably freak seeing as it is raining but Alex decided what he didn't know couldn't hurt him. Pulling on his hoodie and sneakers, Alex grabbed his keys and headed down the hall to let Liz know he was going, someone should at least know he was going for a drive.

Alex quietly knocked before opening the door and slipping his head in, only to find Liz curled up in a ball fast asleep next to a magazine-reading Serena, who only arched an eyebrow at his presence.

"I'm going for a drive" Alex said softly so not to wake up Liz, knowing that she was a light sleeper.

"Some place particular?" Serena asked.

"Nah, just need to get out." Alex replied shaking his head.

"Feeling the wind blow through your hair?" Serena joked and Alex smiled.

"Something like that" and with a nod Alex closed the door and headed down his light blue 1994 Honda Accord. Alex turned the engine over, pulled out of the driveway and roared down the road. Alex had no idea where he was going to go he just needed to move, just needed to drive and feel like he had the option to go anywhere he wanted. His father had once told him that he got the need to be free quality from his mother, Alex was very much like his Mother or at least he'd been told so.

She had been an amazing woman, his father had said. Talking about her always made Jeff Whitman sad but there were times when he told his children about her. He never wanted them to not remember her, just that it was still hard for him to lose his soul mate. She had been a free spirit, he had said. Someone who glowed from the inside out, she was extremely wise for someone so young, except when it came to love, for love she was a sucker. 'Just like me' thought Alex. He had actually been named after her, the first time she saw him she had said he had her eyes, that he was like a male her, Jeff always laughed that it was the drugs she taken for the pain but they had named him Alex after her anyway.

"Oh mom, I wish you were still here. You'd know what to do about Isabel, I reckon you would like her. I swear under it all she has a beautiful soul mom, but something is going on and it makes her hard." Alex said taking to the empty car, it was something he did often, his dad had told him once that even if she wasn't there in body she was still there watching over them all.

Alex turned on the windscreen wipers as he turned down the road that led to the park where his mom had taken him before she died. Alex squinted as he noticed the figure walking in front of him in only a soaked t-shirt and track pants with long blonde hair falling down in tendrils down her back. Alex blinked bewilderedly and slowed the car to a stop beside the figure.

"What the hell?" Alex whispered and climbed out of the car as the figured turned to him.

"Isabel?"

TBC

Thank you to my lovely readers
alizaleven
Sternbetrachter
cassie
Mt Gazer
Allie Xie
and thanks to any lurkers out there, *hugs*
And without further adu...



//Chapter 8//

"Isabel?"

Isabel wearily lifted her head at the sound of someone calling her name, turning her gaze towards the voice she couldn't mask her surprise and worry at the sight of Alex standing there, watching her with a very confused look upon his face as rain began to stain his light blue hoodie making it appear dark blue. Isabel watched his hoodie change colour, not noticing as Alex slowly moved towards her lost fragile form. Isabel blinked heavily once, releasing the salty tears from the confines of her eyes and felt as they rolled down her cheeks mingling with the rain until she no longer knew whose tears were dropping off the edge where her cheeks met her neck. Lifting her face Isabel looked up into the dark cloudy sky.

"My mother once told me that the rain was the angel's tears, that when there was a storm it was 'cause God was angry and thunder was God yelling at the angel's and then they would cry." Isabel said quietly as another bolt of lightning lit up the sky and the rain started to pelt down like rocks falling from the sky.

Alex looked at Isabel worried, she wasn't making any sense. Isabel had never been one to ramble nonsense, well at least not to him, and walk around barefooted in the middle of a storm at nearly midnight in a thin grey shirt and old sweat pants that clung to her body like a second skin in the rain and if he wasn't mistaken that was blood pooling around her left foot. This wasn't like her and it was really scaring Alex, Isabel was staring right through him.

Isabel's bottom lip quivering helplessly as she tried to hold back another onslaught of sobs that demanded to be let out. Alex slowly lifted a hand to brush some of her tendrils of hair off her soaked face.

"Isabel, what's going on?" In those four words Isabel remembered every reason why she had pushed Alex away. Alex could see through her and would see through her if she let him. Isabel could feel the heat from Alex's fingers as he stroked her face, all the way to the bottom of her dark soul and it was too much for her to handle, Isabel looked into his eyes and wanted to weep at the total acceptance in his eyes.

"Don't.Don't please." Isabel whispered harshly as she began to back away from him, shaking her head trying to clear her mind of the insane thoughts of just surrendering into his arms like she was craving to do but Alex would have none of it, for every step Isabel took backwards Alex took one forward. Alex could feel it with every fiber of his body that if he let Isabel run away right now, whatever terrible thing that had happened to put Isabel in this state was only going to get worse with her on her own.

"Isabel, stop!" Isabel shook her head no and turned away, her walk becoming a jog as she began to panic at Alex's refusal to go away and leave her alone.

"No, I can't!" Alex frowned and reached out trying to grab Isabel's arm to stop her but couldn't grasp Isabel's wet skin and it slipped right through his fingers.

"Why?" Alex said starting to get exasperated as Isabel began to run to get away from him. Isabel's eyes clouded with tears and her feet were aching the harder she ran but no matter how fast she ran she could hear Alex running right behind her.

"Isabel, stop!" Alex called out. Alex panted as he chased Isabel through the trees of the park that Isabel had ran into, his long legs gave him a slight advantage but Isabel's intense want to get away from him meant she was still ahead of Alex. Alex was beginning to suspect Isabel wasn't looking where she was going at all as she barely missed running into another tree for the fifth time.

Isabel's body was racked with pain, her ribs made her want to double over with every breath she took and they hurt more and more the harder she had to breath to run. Isabel closed her eyes and just ran, ran from Alex and his probing eyes, ran from her family and their pity, ran from Hank and his demons, Isabel just wanted to run forever. Isabel opened her eyes as Alex's panicked cry of her name reached her ears but it was too late to stop.

Alex jumped over the large tree root that stuck out of the ground and that had tripped Isabel over. Alex began to panic when Isabel didn't get back up; she had been running really fast and hit the ground pretty hard. Kneeling down beside her Alex gently rolled Isabel over onto her back, she had scratches on her arms and on her stomach where her t-shirt had rolled up. Alex frowned at the dark bruising on her ribs realizing that was why she had been so hurt when they had bumped into each other this morning. Alex lifted his gaze to Isabel's face and soothingly began to brush of some of the dirt that had caked itself on her face and push Isabel's hair back off her forehead. Isabel's eyes began to flutter open and Alex realized he had never been so happy in his entire life to see someone open their eyes.

"Izzy..." Alex whispered as he cupped her cheeks in his hands, Isabel only poked her pink tongue out to wet her dry lips as she brought her hands up to cover his.

"Stop running." Alex said simply but they both knew his two simple words meant so much more. Isabel stared into Alex's eyes as he crouched over her cold and muddy body for what seemed like an eternity to both of them, Isabel finally nodded. Lying on cold, wet grass in a dark, scary park in the middle of the night, it was a funny feeling for Isabel because with Alex's finger tips caressing her cheeks and his warm breath mingling with hers as he bent over her with a look of love and concern reflecting in his eyes, Isabel had never felt so safe. Alex and Isabel stared locked into each other's eyes, their faces inches apart as they breathed in their mingled breaths, time seemed to stop as they watched each other, waiting for the other to make the first move. Alex threw caution to the wind and slowly moved closer never taking his off Isabel's face, watching for any sign that she would move away, preying to every god that he could think of that she wouldn't move away.

He's going to kiss me

I'm going to let him kiss me

Isabel let her eyes fall close as Alex gently pressed his lips against hers. Isabel's lips tingled as Alex softly rubbed his lips against Isabel's and then pulled back, with her eyes still closed Isabel let out a deep sigh of contentment. Isabel's heart pounded and raced in her chest and her whole body pulsed with electricity, she felt like she was floating off the ground beneath her, she felt calmer then she had ever felt. She had never felt anything like this, granted she had only ever kissed one other boy and that was Kyle and they had been playing a game when it happened and they had been equally grossed out. This was Isabel's first real and proper first kiss. Isabel slowly opened her eyes as she felt Alex stroke her face.

"Wow.." Isabel breathed out in amazement.

Alex couldn't believe he had just kissed Isabel Evans, the girl of his dreams and that she was laying beneath him looking at him like the sun rose and fell in his eyes, he really didn't think he was that great of a kisser. Alex lifted their joined hands amazed that she was allowing him this glorious privilege and never taking his eyes off her, kissed her knuckles and each of her finger tips. Alex couldn't hold back his proud smile when he realized Isabel was blushing and smiling at him, Isabel rolled her eyes playfully at him but never lost her bright smile.

"Alex?"

"Hmm?" Alex replied as he gazed dreamily at Isabel.

"I'm kinda cold and wet and um I think I've hurt my ankle." Isabel said self consciously and bit her lip, hoping she hadn't just broken the spell they were under. Alex moved back to look down at Isabel's ankle and Isabel began to panic slightly that whatever they had just had was over but Alex didn't let go of her hand and squeezed it gently, turning back to face and give her a smile.

"It looks kinda bruised Izzy, I don't think you should walk on it." Alex said, his voice wrought with concern her, Alex took a deep breath, a small part worried that despite the kiss they had just shared Isabel was about to shoot down his plan.

"I'm going to carry you to my car Iz and then I'll drive you to my house or I could take you back to your house or where ever you want to go." Alex said secretly hoping she wanted to stay with him, like he wanted to stay with her.

"I don't want to go home, can I, can I come with you?" Isabel said worrying her bottom lip with her teeth, nervous even though it had been Alex that had suggested going to his place.

"I'd like that." and for the second time that night Isabel blushed.

Alex let go of Isabel hands and wrapped them around his neck as he placed his hands under her knees and behind her back and lifted her straight off the ground. Isabel giggled quietly at Alex's show of manly behavior as he began to walk back towards his car outside the park.

"What are you laughing at?" Alex said with a curious smirk.

"I didn't know you were so strong and manly." Isabel said still softly giggling.

"Hey, don't let my compact appearance fool you." Alex chuckled wiggling his eyebrows even though Isabel couldn't see them as she tucked her head against his shoulder, Alex dropped a kiss onto Isabel's forehead and smiled when she let out a tiny sigh against his neck. Alex put his niggling curiosities as to why Isabel was out in the middle of night, to the back of his mind unwilling to interrupt the peace she had found in his arms, Alex knew eventually they would have to talk but right now he couldn't force her or himself to break the bubble that had formed around them.

Alex gently lowered Isabel to stand against the side of his car while he unlocked the door and fussed over her when she winced at the pain in her side and in her ankle and foot. Isabel stared at Alex as he leant in the car, pushing the seat back so she could sit comfortably. Isabel felt torn, she had spent her most of her life hiding from people and pushing them away if they tried to get too close but it had been different with Alex. Yes, she had pushed him away because she had always known that if she let him see the truth that Alex wouldn't run, he would know it wasn't her fault but now, stabbing Hank had been her fault, she had picked up the scissors, would Alex still standby her?

"Ok so here's my idea, just hold the seatbelt against you so it looks like you've got it on but this way it wont aggravate your side and I'll just drive really careful, so we don't have an accident." Alex said with a goofy smile as he held the car door open ready to help Isabel into the passenger seat and Isabel couldn't help but smile at his enthusiasm, Isabel had dealt with pain before, granted this was pretty high on the pain scale but Isabel had a feeling Alex would be this caring even if she had only stubbed her toe.

Alex helped her into the seat and leaned over her, trying to make Isabel more comfy. Isabel hooked her finger into the pocket of Alex's hoodie as he began to move backwards out of the car; Alex looked down at Isabel curiously when he realized it was her he was snagged on. Isabel pushed the lump in her throat down and leaned up till her lips met Alex's again, ignoring the pain in her side Isabel lifted her hands up to hold Alex's face between her palms. Isabel thought to herself that she was doomed; there was no way she would be able to walk away from Alex's lips.

TBC

[OOC- I'm warning... I have not had this beta'd, sorry I only finished it this morning but it's a little longer then usual, and I have the new banner for TOTL woot! I figured that since I have re-written the story that it should have a new banner and Rosdude has done and absolutely fantabulous job, Thank you chad your the bomb!!!... and without further adu!]



//Chapter 9//
[ How To Completely Disappear – Radiohead ]

Maria quietly closed the door behind her as she slipped into the hallway leaving a peacefully sleeping Amelia behind tucked safely into bed. She let out a quiet sigh of mourning as she felt the thick cream carpet between her toes, she could remember back to the first time she felt the soft and squishy carpet when she had only been four, a tiny little girl with long blonde hair in two pigtails with bright yellow ribbons and dressed in a bright yellow dress with sunflowers all over it.

Jim had picked her up out of the red station wagon while her mom held Kyle’s hand and walked them to the door of their new home where they would all be a family. Maria could remember how excited she was, she was going to live in this huge house with her mommy and her new daddy and her new big brother Kyle. Jim had put her down onto the floor and told her and Kyle to go choose which bedrooms they liked and Maria had giggled at the carpet because it was so bouncy.

Maria wanted to scream at the unfairness of it all, where was the justice in this world that a man could take the innocence of four beautiful children, make them live their lives in fear, living like it was a fight of the fittest, that’s not how children are supposed to grow up, they’re supposed to grow up with parents who love them and nurture them like Amy and Jim had done to Kyle and herself, playing tea parties with them and taking them to little league games and ballet recitals and supported them when they decided that wasn’t where their hearts lay.

Kyle watched as his mother as she moved around the kitchen, wiping down benches and putting away clean dishes with a sigh, the lines of concern and worry highlighted on her face. Kyle felt so empty and all he wanted to do was fall to the ground, curl up in a ball and cry but he was trying to be strong. Kyle folded his arms across his chest and stared at the patch of blood on his sleeve that he hadn’t noticed. Kyle could hardly breathe as the scene unfolded in his mind, Kyle laying half dead on the floor in front of him while Isabel stared right through him as she gripped the scissors in her bloodied hand and her black cotton panties that he could since her zipper was down, it was all so real, it was happening again.

That there
That's not me
I go
Where I please
I walk through walls
I float down the Liffey
I'm not here
This isn't happening
I'm not here
I'm not here

“Kyle?” Amy said watching her son stare into the distance as the colour drained from his face, leaving him white as a ghost.

“Kyle?” Amy touched his arms gently just as Kyle began to slide to the floor, not strong enough to hold him Amy slid with him.

“Oh mom there was just so much blood…. It was everywhere” Kyle said as Amy wrapped her arms around him as they leaned back against the kitchen cabinets.

Maria walked into the kitchen and looked at them curiously as Kyle began to quietly cry into his mother’s neck. She moved to sit down next to them and grasped Kyle’s hand in her own, showing family solidarity.
Diane laid her head down onto the small bunk in her prison cell and stared emotionless at the grey stone walls that surrounded her, as she pondered her life. She was going to go to prison, for how long she didn’t know but it would be less time then she deserved, consecutive life sentences would be less time then she deserved for what she had done, letting that monster beat her children while she watched and she had stayed with him for her own selfish desire because she was afraid to be alone.

He was going to rape her daughter, he would have had Isabel not stabbed him. Diane let out a moan of pain as the tears formed in her eyes. Her babies had seen so much evil, how could she have done this.

“Philip, oh god Philip it should have been me that died in that fire, no you, you were such a good father and look what I’ve done to our perfect angels, I’ve tainted them Philip” Diane whispered, closing her eyes.

“But I’ll make it better; I won’t let them pay for my mistakes any more Philip, I’ll make it better”

“Light outs Guerin!” The prison guard called as her cell went pitch black and for the first time since her husband’s death, Diane prayed, prayed for forgiveness, for her children and for the strength to make things right.

In a little while
I'll be gone
The moment's already passed
Yeah it's gone
And I'm not here
This isn't happening
I'm not here
I'm not here

Max stared at the house that he and his brother and sister had found solace in growing up, a place where they could be normal children and have some semblance of family, of comfort, he wanted to cry at the fact that once again life had kicked them while they were down, it felt like to Max that they would never get a break, it always just seemed an uphill battle. With a saddened sigh Max cut the engine and pulled off his seatbelt and got out of the Jeep and began to walk towards the house, Max felt like his legs were made of lead, never had the walk across this yard seemed so long.

Michael paused, watching his brother walk towards the house defeat showing in every stride he took, Michael’s chest hurt with the tears he was keeping bottled inside, he was going to be strong; he was going to hold it together for his family, be strong for them. Max reached the door and knocked as Michael walked the path Max had just taken, the door gently opened and Michael was caught by look of weariness and pain that Maria wore, shocked at how small and feeble she looked standing in the doorway; gone was the vibrant and fiery pixie he had left here so many months ago.

“I’m so glad you’re finally here” Maria said quietly as she opened the door up wider to let them in.

Strobe lights and blown speakers
Fireworks and hurricanes
I'm not here
This isn't happening
I'm not here
I'm not here

It felt like their footsteps echoed to Max, the silence seemed deafening. Everything had been dulled to Max, his baby sister had stabbed someone and his mother was going to prison in her place, it all felt surreal, like he was waiting for someone to jump out and shout “Gotcha” or that weird Ashton Kutcher guy to tell him he’d been Punk’d but he knew deep down it wasn’t going to happen, it hadn’t happened when Amelia had been born and it certainly wasn’t going to happen now.

“So where is she?” Michael asked gruffly looking anywhere but at Maria, knowing that if he didn’t hold his emotions he would never make it through talking with Izzy.

“She’s upstairs” Amy said coming into the room, giving Max and Michael sympathetic motherly looks. Michael tried to hide his feelings of fear and instead just headed towards the stairs and the bedroom which held Isabel.

Max watched his brother go, he would go up in a second but he knew Michael would need to talk to Isabel alone to ease his own guilt and possibly Isabel’s as well. Max looked around the room at the people who had been like a second family he and his siblings, Maria seemed small and feeble, Amy looked concerned but by far Kyle looked the worst.

Kyle looked like a picture of a returned soldier that Max had once seen in high school, in his history class, a look of horror, of weariness, a look that he had also seen on himself when he looked in a mirror and like a light bulb had lit up over his head Max knew Kyle must have saved their sister.
Michael came bounding down the stairs, taking two at a time. Max looked at him confused which quickly turned to fear at the look on Michael’s face.

“She’s gone” He said as his eyes caught and held Max’s worried gaze.

Serena pulled the head phones off as she felt the vibration of someone moving up the hallway, she looked down at her cousin who was still sound asleep, Serena was pretty sure Liz would sleep through an explosion. As the footsteps came closer she could hear whispering and immediately recognized the voice of her cousin, Alex… But who was he whispering to?

Serena’s mother was always telling her she was to curious for her own good but she just couldn’t help it and so quietly she crept to the door of Liz’s bedroom and opened it a crack just as the two figure walked into Alex’s room, well one walked and the other limped. Serena knew the one walking was Alex and she was pretty sure the other was Isabel Evans.

“Well fancy that…” She said softly as she walked into the hallway, Serena could hear snippets of Alex and Isabel’s conversation as she got closer to Alex’s door, could hear the concern in Alex’s voice and the pain in Isabel’s.

Wrapping her knuckles lightly on the door, she didn’t want to wake anyone else in the house up; she couldn’t see Isabel’s presence in the house going down lightly with Uncle Jeff or hell even Lizzie would have a bit of a freak out.

Alex looked at the door trying not to panic or look panicked for Isabel’s sake. The two of them were covered in mud and Isabel was covered in bruises and if that was his dad or his sister this would not end well. Turning to Isabel who was sat on his bed, a fact that he trying to pretend wasn’t a big deal, he put his fingers to his lips asking her to remain silent Isabel nodded. Hiding from other people now this was a game she was familiar with, her and her brothers had done it with the Valenti’s till they were in their teens.

Serena waited patiently until Alex opened the door, only opening it a crack so he could peek around it but Serena couldn’t see in.

“Too late cuz, I’s already seen her…” Serena said her New York accent a welcome sound to Alex’s ears as he let Serena push her way into his room. Alex knew Serena would keep her mouth shut, She was a curious cat but not a gossip and plus, she would be able to help bandage Isabel up.

“She’s safe Iz” Alex said nodding at Serena before ducking out of the room to grab the first aid box they kept in the bathroom.

“Hey” Isabel gave Serena a small shy smile back in greeting as Serena sat down at the computer desk across from her. Alex walked back into the room and opening the first aid box, laid the contents on the bed.
“Serena’s dad was a boxer and she used to do strapping for him, you know like patch up his bandages and stuff, she’s much better then me… I can barely put a band aid on, that is if you don’t mind? ” Alex said with a cheeky grin as he kneeled by Isabel legs, with one hand hidden from Serena as he rubbed Isabel’s calf. Isabel gave a small nod and tried not to smile at the warmth of Alex’s hand on her leg. Standing up Alex moved making room for Serena to get to Isabel.

“I just clean the areas that need attention and leave the rest to yous” Serena said as she made a move to bandage Isabel’s foot.

Alex handed Serena another bandage and then sat down in the computer chair she had just vacated and watched as she moved her hands gently across Isabel’s flesh and wished harder then ever before that he had paid attention in First Aid so it could have been his hands instead of Serena’s.

It seemed like the whole world was white noise to Alex as soon as his eyes caught Izzy’s, he watched as she turned her head to murmur something to Serena but Alex couldn’t hear them, he had fazed out staring at the girl of his dreams who was sitting on his bed with her shirt up… and Alex was back. Taking what he hoped was a quiet deep breath he tried to swallow down the huge lump in his throat and will the other part of his anatomy to go down; sure he’d seen Izzy’s stomach before when they were out in the rain but for some reason now it was different, maybe it was that they were in his home or maybe it was the fact that she was sitting on his bed, whatever it was, it was seriously messing with his gentlemen persona.

“Alex?” Isabel asked with a small laugh and a knowing smile.

Looking up Alex realized that while in his little day dream he had missed Serena’s departure and Isabel crawling further up his bed and at the sight of her moving his pillows around her, looking so at home he had a feeling this was going to be a long and hard night.