Roswell Fanatics

Banner by me

Title: Happy Easter

Genre: AU M/L Mature/lang.

Summary : Sequel to Happy Valentine’s Day

Disclaimer: I am not affiliated with the show Roswell nor any of it’s constituents. I have borrowed the names of the characters simply because I like them.

*~*~*

Chapter: 1/4

Hello everyone, here I am again cheerful and fat and getting fatter everyday, five months and counting. Max insists he isn’t laughing at me when he has to pull me up out of the recliner but I know better, that twinkle in his eyes says it all but it’s a kind laugh. I really don’t mind because it means our babies are growing nicely, as is their mother I might add, and things seem to be moving right along here. We are lucky, lucky, lucky…two at a time, they won’t be lonesome! And to say that our friends are excited is an understatement. I think they are more excited than our parents are and that’s saying something!

The days are starting to get longer with Spring arriving on time and Max has taken to driving me to work these days because my belly is so big that I have to push the seat back so far to get behind the steering wheel that my feet don’t reach the pedals. That is the worst part of this experience…it almost tops the herniated esophagus earlier this year but we don’t talk about that…it’s forgotten but I don’t like having to be driven everywhere I want to go. Max has also put a little step stool in the back seat so I can step up into the SUV more comfortably. It really is a funny sight I guess and he just keeps on smiling.

Well, Maria and Tess are here, no surprise there, I’ll be back in a minute.

“Good morning ladies!” And then I look at the somber faces on the other side of my door and stand aside. This is going to take some major discussing, I can tell.

“Come on in, the coffee’s hot…” And I let the sentence drag a little hoping for some input. Nothing!

I take their coats and hang them up as they make their way to the kitchen. I’m not so sure I really want to follow them…maybe I’ll just let them have coffee and the coffee cake I made this morning and I’ll just go for a drive! Fat chance! Fat being the operative word here. That sounds like a much better idea than going into the kitchen but I brace myself, plant a smile on my face and go in to meet the drama.

Maria is pouring three cups of (decaffeinated) coffee into three mugs and has three plates on the table by the time I make my way to the kitchen and Tess is sitting there looking like someone just ran over her puppy. I take my chair, closest to the door for quick calls to the bathroom, and start in…

“Alright, what’s going on?”

Maria looks at Tess, who by the way looks like she’s about to toss her cookies, and promptly informs me that…

“Kyle’s having an affair!”

I look at my two best friends and, I’m sorry but, I start to howl uproariously. Kyle Valenti and affair do not belong in the same sentence…no! Never! And my two friends look at me like I’m insane.

“It’s true.” Tess says, almost sobbing.

“No it isn’t and you know it as well as I do.” Then I look at Maria and give her that look, you know the one, the one that says ‘what the hell have you stirred up now?’ look.

“No Liz, not me! I swear! I had nothing to do with this.” And now I give her that other look, you know the one, the one that says ‘bullshit’.

Tess looks at me then Maria and she still hasn’t uttered a word…but she’s thinking, I can tell. It’s Maria, I know it is.

“Liz, he hasn’t been coming home until really late at least three, sometimes four nights a week and I haven’t a clue as to where he is. What else can it be?” That’s Tess, finally some sanity.

“Well, one thing is for certain Tess, it isn’t an affair. WE’LL PROVE IT!!! We’ll follow him!” I announce with determination…there problem solved. We’ll follow Kyle, see where he’s going and what he’s doing and then she’ll be satisfied that her husband is not having an affair.

“Just how in the hell do you think we’re going to get away with that. We have kids to take care of and other stuff…we can’t just follow him. Besides, he’ll know it’s us.”

“Not if we disguise ourselves and…AND!… Yes, we’ll rent a car.” I’m on a roll here people, stay with me.

Both women look at me like I’m nuts and I shrug my shoulders and take a bite of my coffee cake. I can’t get enough to eat anymore… I’m starved all of the time.

“You want to know what he’s doing right? Well then, we follow him,” I swallow my cake, “ see what he’s up to and let it go…because I know he’s not having an affair so all we need to do is find out what he is doing.” That’s simple enough, right?

“But what about the kids?” Maria adds to the conversation.

“Max can watch the kids, we’ll tell him we’re invited to one of those ‘come and buy something’ parties.”

“What kind of party?” Maria wants to know.

“Hell, I don’t know!. Pots and Pans! What difference does it make, a damned party! …That way we can go to the Kitchen’s and More store and pick up some gadgets in a couple of weeks and make it look good.”

“Okay, what kind of disguises?” Maria is still wanting details people…the woman has no imagination except when she’s conjuring up bullshit. Maria needs a job, something to keep her busy.

“How abut Easter Bunnies? Easter is Sunday, we can be Easter bunnies.”

That’s Tess, she’s getting with the program here people, this is going to be so much fun!!! Only because I know Kyle isn’t cheating, shit I hope we don’t discover something we aren’t supposed to know yet, like a surprise!

“Fine, where do we get these Easter bunny costumes?”

Maria!!! The woman would make Jesus cry, I swear.

“How about we look in the yellow pages and find us a costume rental place. Does that answer your question?”

I answer her very calmly…honest, my middle name here, calm…serene…happy. AHMMMM! Hum with me here…it’ll make you feel better!

She thinks about it for a minute and then smiles…

“Sounds great!” And so we go into the office and get a phone book and proceed to check out costume rentals…each on her own cell phone asking for bunny costumes. Tess finally finds one in Las Cruces…

"if we’re going to do this we’d better head out now because we need to be back before school is out."

“Hey, tell you what. You and Maria head to Las Cruces and I’ll pick the kids up from school just in case you get caught up in traffic. Liz, you get two in your size and one will certainly fit me. I’ll see you when you get back.”

“Great, in the meantime you can rent a car from the rental place and we can pick it up and park it down the block tomorrow.”

So Tess heads on out to rent a car and Maria and I head to Las Cruces to pick up three bunny costumes. This is ridiculous if you really want to know the truth and Max will kill me if he finds out what I’m up to so I just won’t tell him, the things I do for my friends!!! Oh, but this is going to be so much fun!!!!

*~*~*

Carolyn: I hope it's fun...and thank you for the banner compliment, it was fun to do.
Eve: It's too bad the story is finished...I had no idea about making Liz an egg, that would have been fun.
StarCharms. Thank you for your kinds words...it's meant to be fun and enjoy those little ones, I'm missing not having any around anymore. My youngest grandson is 17 and busy riding mountain bikes.
Natalie36: Yep, Easter Bunnies, they are characters are they not?
Valentinebaby: Well, we just have to wait and see what the three little bunnies get themselves into this time...

*~*~*

Chapter: 2/4

Well Maria and I arrived home from Las Cruces just in time to stop by the school and pick up the kids and then Maria dropped me off at home. We kept the costumes in Maria’s trunk until tomorrow morning so we can try them on…I know Max would want to know what they’re for and I didn’t want to lie to him, so we’ll keep them out of sight. It’s bad enough that I am actually lying by omission, right? Just a little maybe? So I think it is better this way. Maria knows how I feel about keeping things from Max…we learned early on in high school that it was just not a good idea to keep secrets from each other so we never have. Sometime the truth was a little hurtful but a lot less than it would have been had we found out certain things from other people.

So Max and I spent a lovely evening at home and the subject of Kyle’s infidelity nor the bunny suits ever came up. I know Max would have laughed as hard as I did over Maria’s new drama but we’ll find the answer soon enough.

Max looked down at me all curled up under his arm and gave me one of those ‘twinkle in the eye’ looks and I grinned up at him and allowed him to pull me up off the couch and herd me on up the steps and into our bedroom…and whoopee!!! Ladies and gentlemen, let me tell you my husband is one fine specimen, and we are getting very creative with this bump I’ve got growing in front of me. It’s like Max says… he loves a challenge, and boy is it getting to be a challenge…we sometimes have to laugh at the situation but we manage and life doesn’t get any better than this.

We have the nursery all ready for the babies, we have a large crib in my office downstairs, which will eventually be moved upstairs when we feel the babies are ready to be separated from each other, and another one upstairs. We plan on co-bedding them for about 4 to 6 weeks, we’ll know when the time is right. We also have two bassinets in our room…all of the linens for the beds match the wallpaper and curtains and we were told not to buy another thing by just about every person we know so we haven’t. We’ll just wait until after the shower that Maria and Tess are planning. So, as I said, life just doesn’t get any better although I do have to fight myself to stay out of baby shops…the urge is overwhelming but I promised and a promise is a promise.

*

“Max, Max honey wake up…it’s 7:30.” We sort of stayed awake last night making love with each other and then talking until the wee hours. Lord knows what we had to talk about but we do find the most interesting subjects when we should be closing our eyes. Last night was ridiculous names for the babies…at least I hope he thought they were ridiculous…there’s no way I would even consider some of them. We’ll probably go with the more standard names…after all the child has to live with it the rest of his or her life and to be called something “over the top” by today’s standards doesn’t necessarily mean that it will be thought of as unique 20 years down the road. If they don’t like what we choose though they can always change it. Had a cousin do that once….Effie to Gail. Not a bad move really. Especially with today’s slang what it is, it’s awfully close to effin’ don’t you think?

Max is finally stretching and grabbing me by the shoulders…his usual m.o…now I’m being pulled in for a morning kiss on the head and then he’s up, turning around and pulling me up. It wouldn’t be so bad if I could just get a grip on something and pull myself up, I can’t roll over on my stomach because it’s too big so it’s scoot to the foot of the bed and reach for the floor with my feet or get a hand. I’d rather have a hand, especially Max’s hand. It’s really strange, I didn’t start to show until well after three months and then bam, there they were!

(Eve: M.O. – method of operation in this case… )

I’m up and in the bathroom in nothing flat, made my usual potty call, washed my hands and brushed my teeth. A quick shower, with Max of course, then dressed and downstairs to make the coffee and get ready for the girls. I’m sure we will be trying on bunny suits today.

Just as I expected, right at 9:15 the doorbell rings and there they are. I smile as I take their jackets and hang them up while they head on out to the kitchen. Max is already in there having his breakfast and Maria plops down next to him while Tess gets a couple of cups from the cupboard. Max just smiles at them and shakes his head as I waddle into the kitchen and take my place on the other side of him where my coffee mug still sits.

“Well, what are you three up to today? Anything sinister in the works?”

Tess looks at me with this horrified look on her face and Maria grins and says,

“What do you mean Max? We don’t do sinister!”

“Like hell. You three are always dreaming up something. You know Easter is Sunday…no Easter egg hunts, or egg coloring parties planned?”

“No smarty pants…we are taking the kids to the city park this year for the annual Easter egg hunt and we might do bar-b-q there too so how’s that grab ya’ huh?” Tess asks, and she’s actually smiling. Good. Kyle must have come home last night.

“Well, if you’ve got something planned keep it legal and safe.” Max said with a grin and I almost wondered if he knew what we had planned.

Maria and Tess both looked at me and all I could do was shrug my shoulders…I had no idea what he was talking about and I needed to let them know that I hadn’t spilled the beans either.

“Max, why do you say that. If we had something planned you would know about it. Right?”

“Wrong Liz. I only know what you want me to know, now I’ve got to get going so you three can get on with your projects.”

And with that my husband got up off his chair, put his dishes in the sink, kissed the top of my head and bid us all good bye.

“Liz, did you tell him anything?” Maria folks, jump right in DeLuca…whoops, Guerin.

“No Maria, he’s being that way because what he says is true. We are always up to something so it’s very safe for him to say that, especially with Easter on the horizon.”

“Well, not always Liz. Do we look different when we’re up to stuff? Maybe that’s how he can tell.”

“I don’t know…do you have a guilt complex or something going on that only men can read because you look the same to me.”

Tess is just sitting there watching the two of us and then she pipes up with…

“Well, enough of this shit. Where’s the costumes? What do they look like?”

“Oh just wait til you get a load of these Tess…they are so cute and Liz looks darling in hers because she makes the belly stick out. Honest to God they are fabulous, real fur and all.” Maria can’t shut up about the bunnies to save her soul…

“Well, can I see them?” Tess wants a look not a description.

“Sure. They’re in my trunk…I’ll be right back.”

So Maria leaves and I look at Tess…

“Was he home last night?”

“Yeah, and he acts like nothing is wrong. I don’t understand it Liz, why can’t he tell me where he is all these nights?”

“Sweetheart, he acts like nothing is wrong because nothing is wrong. We’ll get to the bottom of this honest. You know Maria exaggerates and can make a mountain out of a mole hill.”

“Yeah, that’s true but then look at your hernia…she knew.”

“She knew I wasn’t home Tess…nothing is going on, I know it.”

About that time Maria came back in carrying three garment bags and when we took the bunny suits out of them Tess stood there and giggled.

“You know, if we get stopped for any reason whatsoever it’s going to be hell like we’ve never known.” Tess told us through her giggles…

“Why in the hell would we ever get stopped?”

By that time we were all dressed up like bunnies and laughing hysterically at each other and then I waddled over to the pantry and got a couple of baskets out and handed them to the girls…”We need candy!!!” And they laughed even harder…

“We need yellow peeps! Lots and lots of yellow peeps.”

And so we added boxes of yellow peeps and Easter baskets to our grocery lists for the day, took the costumes off and headed to the market.

While we were at the market doing our shopping Tess’ cell rang and it was Kyle…

“Hi Babe, I’m going to be running late again this evening so don’t wait dinner okay?”

I could tell by looking at her that she wanted to cry but I pointed to our grocery list and smiled.

“Tess, I promise you we will get to the bottom of this.”

And then I dialed Max’s cell and left him a message that we were going to a “Pampered Chef” party tonight at Serena’s house and I would catch up with him later, of course I didn’t know that Serena was in his office with Jarred while I was on the phone but that’s okay…after tonight he’d know all about our escapade anyway.

“Maria, why don’t you have Michael watch the kids tonight while we’re gone?
It will only be for a couple of hours.”

“Oh I can’t do that Liz. Michael has night shift at the museum three nights a week until the buyer gets back from New York. We can get a sitter though. I have a good one just next door and since it’s just for a couple of hours we can grab some deli chicken and salads for the kids’ dinner and after we’ve done our trick we can stop and get us something.”

“Dressed as Easter bunnies?” I yelled…

“Yeah, hell, no one knows us and they sure as hell won’t recognize us in those get ups.”

“Well okay…deli for the kids and something for us later it is, I’ll pick up some chicken and stuff for Max too.”

So we took our Easter baskets home and filled them with grass, jelly beans and yellow peeps and were ready to go. Since the kids were all going to be at Maria’s we decided to dress at Tess’ and pick up the rental car and leave it there. Kyle would never be the wiser. And things were coming together swimmingly. Oh people this is really going to be fun. I know Kyle isn’t cheating but the fun we are going to have on our girls night out is just awesome. I can hardly wait.

*

Max:

“Hey Serena, are you having a “Pampered Chef” party tonight?”

“God no Max…I’ve got a sick kid here and even though he’ll be chipper as all get out by this evening the last thing I need after the night I put in is a party. Why?”

“Oh, no reason, I thought I heard someone mention it.” I say with a knowing grin and leave the room to get to my next patient. Liz seems to forget that Roswell isn’t that big of a town, I just wonder what in the hell they are up to now?

*~*~*

Eve: I’m so glad you enjoyed the breakfast scene with Max and yes, he definitely knows the girls and their habits. As for Kyle, hang in there…I think you’ll like what’s coming.
Carolyn: Definitely have some trouble brewing here and we definitely hope they can keep this safe and legal.
Valentine Baby: Yes, Tess has been listening to Maria hounding her and she finally, sorta’, believes her b.s., not totally. And I agree with you about having Maria as a friend. ( I wouldn’t even have had the one on the show as my friend) Anyway, you stick around through “Happy fourth of July” and you’ll find out why Maria is acting the way she is. The series is complete and one part flows into the other with each part covering the three friends and their adventures, but there is a good reason, honest.

*

Chapter: 3/4

Liz:

Well we picked up the rental and it’s parked outside. Maria picked up all four kids and took them home with her. She called the teenager next door to come over, put the chicken and salads in the fridge with instructions to feed the kids at five and then came over to Tess’ to meet up with us. We started getting into our costumes right at 4:00 because we had to be at the garage at five to follow Kyle. That’s what time he closed up shop…oh did I mention that he owns Toby’s auto shop …only it’s Kyle’s Auto and Body Shop now.

I looked at Maria and Tess and they looked so cute…the costumes are actually white rabbit fur and the rabbit ears are pink satin in the front. The faces have rabbit eyes, nose and mouth, there’s whiskers and you can flip the hood up for better vision if you’re going to be driving or whatever, there’s white fur hands with pink satin palms and you can slip your hands out of them if you want to. Tess was doing the driving so Maria and I chose to wear our masks because they were so cute. Tess drove through Taco Bell on our way and we ate as we waited for the garage to close. I had a bean and cheese burrito and Maria and Tess each had Tacos Supreme. God was it good, I hadn’t had a bean burrito in ages.

Right at five Kyle came out of the garage, locked everything up and climbed into his truck and took off…Tess hot on his heels. We followed him for a few miles out of town and it surely didn’t look like he was going to meet any lady friend anytime soon. He drove right up to this large closed up factory looking building with a sign out front that said…”Space Available” and drove around back.

We got out of our car, I had my Easter basket with me for some damned reason, and we went around the side of the building and spotted Kyle’s truck parked at one of the doors that looked like a garage entrance and Michael’s car was parked right along side of the building as well. I looked at Maria and shook my head at her…

“Unless they’ve pulled a switcheroo here ladies, which I doubt, I would say that your husbands have something besides women on their minds.”

I couldn’t read Maria’s expression because she looked like Peter Rabbit at the moment and Tess started to giggle.

About that time a security guard had a gun on the three of us and said…

“Don’t move.” And we didn’t.

The next thing I know we are headed downtown in a patrol car, handcuffed to each other but I still had my Easter basket. If it wasn’t for these damned handcuffs I’d have a peep.

The patrolman hauls us into the station in handcuffs as Jim Valenti is just on his way out … Tess and Maria both yell at the same time….

“Jim, help!”

Jim Valenti turns around and looks at the three Easter bunnies standing in the middle of his station and starts to belly laugh right in the patrolman’s face.

“Tess, what in the hell have you done now?”

“Nothing. We were following Kyle and the security guard at the building pointed a gun at us and told us not to move so we didn’t. The next thing we know we’re handcuffed together and here we are.”

“Jesus Tess, what in the hell were you following Kyle for?”

And instead of answering Jim Tess looks at Maria. I wish I could see her face right now, I really do. Jim looks at the taller of the three bunnies and shakes his head.

“Maria, what did you convince her of this time?”

“Well, you never know about these things Jim…you have to be sure.” Maria kind of whispered…

“Be sure of what?” Jim bellowed at her…not nice people not nice at all…I had a peep.

“If Kyle was cheating on Tess or not.” Maria said very seriously I might add, and Jim Valenti, who was not wearing a Bunny Rabbit mask, looked at the woman with so many different emotions running across his face that it was truly hard to keep up with them.

“Tess, did you believe her?”

“Well… after two weeks of her bombarding me with all of these different scenarios I had to be sure.”

Tess confessed to her father-in-law.

“Liz, why did you let them talk you into this…you’re pregnant for God’s sake, you shouldn’t be out running around looking like… like this.” And he pointed to my attire and he was not smiling.

“I know Jim, and I knew Kyle wasn’t cheating but I thought it would be fun to have a girls night out, one that I could enjoy, and have a purpose for having it. What better purpose than to stalk Kyle, it was fun…right up to the point of the gun in our faces…OHHHHHHH OW, OW, OW!!!!!”

And I doubled over in pain. Maria and Tess screamed for the officer to unlock the cuffs and Jim yelled…

“HANSON!!! GET AN AMBULANCE HERE QUICK!!! WE’VE GOT A PREGNANT WOMAN DOUBLED OVER IN PAIN AND CALL MAX EVANS AND TELL HIM TO MEET US AT THE HOSPITAL.”

The ambulance was at the station in no time and I was on my way to the hospital with my Easter basket in tow and when I got there my husband was pacing the floor along with Abby, my gynecologist.

Max took one look at me and stifled a laugh as they wheeled me in. I still had a bunny rabbit face on, pushed up but on, and my Easter basket in my hand and I was groaning in agony.

“Liz, what in the hell is this?” I could tell by the look of confusion on his face that he was bewildered and tickled all at the same time.

“I hurt Max…I think I’m in labor.”

Abby pulled out her stethoscope and listened to my belly while I was still on the gurney and said

“No labor. I’m going home Flopsy and when you can move I suggest you do the same.”

About that time I rolled over to reach for Max’s hand and started passing gas like hell wouldn’t have it…I thought I was going to blow the back of that bunny suit out and when it was all over I felt so much better that I wished everyone could see the smile on my face. I held my hand out to my husband who, for the first time since we were six years old, refused to take it. Maria gave me a hand and I was up and waddling out of the ER eating a peep out of my basket and looking for Max’s car while an entire entourage of people were laughing hysterically. I think I might be in trouble when I get home people…he doesn’t look real pleased right now. I think this beats the turkey fiasco in spades…he is pissed people, really pissed. I would offer him a peep but I think it just might be wiser to keep on moving.

I found Max’s car but Max was nowhere to be seen so I turned to see if he was following me, no such luck, he was in the emergency room talking to Jim, Maria and Tess, who had removed their masks by this time. Soon Jim left in his patrol car and Maria and Tess came out of the hospital with Max. They climbed into the back seat and Tess gave Max directions to where our rental car was parked. Instead of letting Maria and Tess out at the rented car he drove around back and pulled up next to Kyle’s truck. To say that the two men inside the building were shocked was an understatement and then when they saw their wives they didn’t know what in the hell to think. Then Michael saw the look on Max’s face and knew …

“Maria, what in the hell have you gotten yourself into now?”

So, when we explained why the bunny suits and why Max was there and the entire evenings activities including the bean burrito the two men just stood there in silence and then Kyle looked at Tess, and he had a very pained look on his face when he said…

“Tess Valenti…I can’t believe that you let her convince you that I would do something like that to you. I thought you loved me and trusted me. God Tess…God, what were you thinking, or were you?”

Tess just stood there and almost cried…she did know better, I knew better…even Maria knew better if you got right down to it. It’s time for Maria to quit causing problems for people, her mouth needs to be washed out with soap, and I had another peep. I offered some to everyone else but they all turned them down.

Tess:

“No Kyle, I wasn’t thinking…not really. Liz knew it was bullshit but she went along with it…she told your dad she thought it would be a fun girls night out. She didn’t do it because she thought we were going to find you doing something wrong she just came along for the ride… and the peeps… I think.”

‘Hell, try a little humor I always say. It might work.’ I thought to myself as I answered my heartbroken husband.

*

“Hey, what’s going on here anyway?” Maria pointed to the interior of the rented space that was full of flood lights and what appeared to be a motorcycle in pieces.

Maria finally joined the conversation…

Michael looked like he was ready to wring her neck, I’ve seen him like this before people… scary, really scary!

“Maria, if we wanted you to know what was going on here you would know. The reason for the secrecy is for your benefit and yours alone. I wouldn’t let Kyle tell Tess where he was because I thought she might tell you. Even though Kyle tried to convince me that Tess would never break a confidence I didn’t want to take a chance. So get your ass home and we’ll finish this conversation when I can do it without wanting to kill you.” Michael Guerin looked like he could kill with just a look, I swear…Superman’s heat vision…

“Alright Michael, if that’s the way you want to be.”

“That’s the way it is Maria not the way I want to be, now go home and see if you can stay out of trouble until I get there.”

“What are you working on Michael?”

“Maria, what part of ‘none of your business’ do you not understand. Go home!”

And Michael pushed her toward Max who backed up and looked at him…I think Max has had about all of Maria he can handle for one day too and although the plan was mine they didn’t have to go along with it but you know I still think it was fun… I know… I’m depraved!

My two bunnies in crime walked around the building to the rental car and I crawled back in next to Max and ate peeps on the way home. Every now and then I would look over at him and catch a little smirk but I never said a word…best let sleeping dogs lie as the saying goes. I don’t want to push my luck, after all last night was great and a repeat wouldn’t be so bad! And I too had a little smirk.

***

Carolyn: No!!! This definitely came out of the clouds and not real life, honest. I’ve done some crazy chit in my time but not this one, and I’m so glad that you’re finding the fic. fun. That’s what it’s meant to be.

Valentinebaby: Whew, you must have been winded on that one, and…I’m not upset or hurt or any of that ‘stuff’. Appreciate that Maria, Tess and Liz have been friends since childhood…and without giving too much away, they have usually ignored Maria’s crazy way of observing things and sometimes things are just personal, even for your best friends. especially lately, it’s just easier to keep things from her than to deal with her. They love her and this behavior is definitely over the top, it’s meant to be and the story will reveal the problem down the road…They have other lives besides Maria and don’t always have time to deal with her drama…and she is a drama queen. She thrives on it but it’s getting out of hand. Even poor Michael is hiding things from her now, and I agree totally, this is not right but that’s what’s happening.

EVE: What can I say…yes, beans…they can truly be one mean dish if not cooked right. I once had a boss who said they made people “socially unacceptable” and he was right on so many levels.

Cardinal: (LOL) Wham Bam thank you maam…as the saying goes…

Rhonda: So happy to hear you’re getting a kick out of this series thing, it was meant to be fun. And yes, there are motorcycles in that factory garage, I knew people would want to know what the big secret was so I hinted at it. As for Maria, well I explained a little to Valentinebaby about her character, and although a total drama queen she does have some problems that will be addressed down the line.

In the meantime everyone is dealing with her as best they can, and I’m trying very hard to make her insanity apparent to everyone and it seems I’m successful since all of you are wondering “why” she is being tolerated. Well, they really do love her but she’s getting more and more impossible to live with so they are doing the best they can. These questions will be addressed down the line and I guess, because this is a series, it’s difficult to come to a conclusion before the end. So far we’re looking at the 4th of July….I may do a couple after that but the fourth is complete.


Chapter: 4/4

When we got home Max came around to the passenger side of the car and held out his hand…I took it. It was the first time he touched me since this morning and I was taking anything I could get at this point and then I started to waddle toward the house with my Easter basket and I heard my husband laughing. He was laughing uncontrollably and for a second there I really thought he was going to choke, I turned around and looked at him and he was standing there with the passenger door still open looking at me. I had no idea what the hell was so funny but if he was enjoying something then that was better than him being angry at me. I had to wait for him to open the door for me because my purse was at Tess’s house along with my clothes but she’d bring them over tomorrow, if she was allowed out that is. And when Max opened the door he allowed me to enter first, which was not unusual, and that’s when I got my first glimpse of me walking in my bunny suit with my Easter basket. We have a full length mirror at the end of the hall and let me tell you it’s no wonder he was laughing. I turned, kicked up a heel, and continued to waddle up the stairs, peeps in hand, and Max was right behind me.

“Liz, what in the name of God were you thinking?”

“Oh Max, I knew Kyle wasn’t cheating on Tess and I know Tess knew that he wasn’t otherwise she wouldn’t have gone along with this hair brained scheme of mine. But it sounded like fun, you know, we girls spend almost every morning together talking about kids, meals, grocery shopping and the like and we never really do anything fun. And Max… this really sounded like something fun to do. We dressed up, we rented a car, we did drive through for dinner and we played P. I.
for a little while and it was fun. If you get right down to it…even getting arrested was fun. I think Tess and Maria are starting to get a reputation down at the station right along with Mrs. Wilson though.”

( Eve: P I stands for Private Investigator…)

Max grinned as he helped me step out of the bunny suit. I was soaked clean through from wearing all of that fur and I had no idea I was sweating so badly.

“Well, Serena was in my office with Jarred when you called and I asked her if she was having a party tonight…guess what she said?”

“My guess would be ‘no’.”

“Your guess would be right. She also said to tell you hello and that you two need to get together for lunch soon.”

“She’s right, it’s been too long. Do you think I could squeeze one by Maria?”

“Liz….I’m beginning to think that Maria is a dangerous friend.”

I looked at Max, studied him for a second, and I think maybe he half believes what he just said.

“Max, she’s not dangerous, she’s, she’s just Maria.”

“Exactly. You and Tess need to start calling her on some of her antics Liz. She can’t go around stirring stuff up the way she does…it’s not healthy.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. We’re so used to it that we just ignore it.”

Max raises an eyebrow at me and says…

“You’re sure about that are you? It didn’t look like things were being ignored tonight…and yes, I know you did it for fun…I understand that, but the reason for the fun in the first place was dangerous. I would hate like hell to think that she would ever convince you that I would do that to you.”

“Max, I think if you tried to do something like that to me I would know it in a heart beat because there is just too much love radiating from you for you to hide that from me.”

And that ladies and gentlemen was all my husband needed to hear…the next thing I knew I was flat on my back and being ravished just like I knew I would be the whole time I was eating those peeps so quietly in the car.

*

The next morning, right at 9:15, the doorbell rang and there they were… looking sheepish as hell. I started laughing as I took their coats and Tess put my purse and clothes on the dining room table for me. Then we all headed to the kitchen where Max was still eating his cocoa puffs and drinking his coffee.

“Good morning ladies… What’s on the agenda today? “

And they both looked a little repentant before Tess spoke up…

“Max, I’m sorry. I know better and I’m old enough to admit it but I was really feeling pretty punk about the whole thing.”

“Hey, I know you know better and if a certain someone had a more positive attitude about life she wouldn’t go around making false accusations about people. People who know and love her and if I ever hear a word about Liz or me it will be the end of this friendship Maria. I know that these two women are very forgiving when it comes to you as are a lot of other people but it’s time for you to take responsibility for your mouth. If it wasn’t for that mouth of yours your husband might be able to confide in you sometime. Did you ever think of that? And that is not a rumor Maria, it isn’t speculation, but a true observation on the part of the rest of us. Now grow up and be responsible.”

And with that Max left the house.

Maria sat there and I could tell she wasn’t sure she wanted to stay or not but Tess and I convinced her she should. After all, she could dish it out, she should learn to take it.

“Do you think he meant that Liz?”

“Yes Maria I do. He knows the stalking was my idea, I told him, and even though it did get a little out of hand it was fun. But Maria, to tell Tess that Kyle was cheating on her wasn’t right and you know it. You can’t keep doing things like this. And yes, Michael does keep things from you because it’s easier than arguing with you. We keep things from you because we don’t want to hear your twisted thoughts on the subject. I won’t lie to you…there’s a lot of things I wouldn’t discuss with you because you just don’t digest information before you let words run out of your mouth. And that isn’t always good so it’s just better to keep important things to ourselves even when you keep pushing for information. What you don’t realize sometime Maria, is that we just need a sounding board not a solution. Max is right Maria, although I wouldn’t want to lose your friendship I would have to agree with him if you started bad mouthing him. Although I would probably call you on it immediately, I wouldn’t let you get away with it and had you said anything to me about Kyle I would have called you on that too. Tess is too nice to say anything to you so she lets you ramble. I’d rather just not tell you.”

“God Liz, do you know how that makes me feel.”

“Not so good I would imagine, but it’s the truth Maria. Are we still on for the park on Sunday?” Change the subject…

“Oh yeah…9:00 a.m. We can go to twilight services if you want to.” She sounds less than enthusiastic about it all.

“Like hell, I did that once in college with Abby. Never again. Baptism of converts,
then Confirmation and two hours later, if you’re lucky it’s mass and then first communion services. Thanks but no thanks. I’ll go to 7:30 a.m. or 7:00 p.m. Maybe 7:30 a.m. so we can relax the rest of the day.”

“Boy, that sounds like a plan to me. Although we only have one service on Easter and it’s at 9:00 so I guess we’ll skip.” Tess said.

“No, let Max and I take the kids to the park and you and Kyle can meet us there after services. Don’t miss Easter services for eggs, we’ll pick them up about 8:30 and you guys go on to church. We’ll come right over after mass.”

“Great. That will give them a chance to see what the Easter Bunny left them and they won’t have to leave their baskets to go to church.”

“Right. When are we going to take those damned bunny suits back?”

Tess looked at Maria who still had this whipped puppy look about her and asked…

“Maria, can you pick the kids up after school tomorrow in case I’m not back from Las Cruces?”

“Yeah, sure Tess. How about the rental car, how much do I owe for that and the costume?” She asked.

Tess took the rental agreement out of her purse and I got my purse and pulled out the costume rental receipts and the calculator and we added everything together and split it three ways, figured out expenditures and then proceeded to present Maria with the biggest portion of the bill. Tess explained that Enterprise picked the car up this morning first thing so we didn’t have to worry about returning it. Then we all started discussing what we were going to do about dinner on Easter Sunday. I guess the look in my eye scared the other two because they just sat there and shook their heads…

“What?” asked Maria cautiously

“Why not have the market cook our dinner for us and we eat at the park. Get everyone together and show up with all of this prepared food that they advertise all of the time and eat off paper plates and leave the mess for the trash man, huh?”

Maria and Tess looked at each other and shook their heads…

“The Rotary Club is serving Bar-B-Q at the park Liz, why not just eat there?”

“What if it rains?” Tess asked.

“Then we go to the Crashdown and eat there.”

**~*~**

Okay everyone, next Sunday the saga continues with the sequel "Happy Father's Day" ...