Title- Tonight
Author- Crazyapplesaucer (Anushruti)
Disclaimer- I don’t own anything.
Category- M/M, TEEN, Maria POV
Spoilers- Behind the Music
Summary- This is my version of what Maria would have gone through in New York to finally make her come back home.
Author’s notes- once I was just listening to the song a thousand miles by Vanessa Carlton, when this m/m fic came to me. I have not yet seen whole of season three but heard a little about it, here and there. This fic is post “behind the music”. Sorry if it violates anything. It’s been haunting me since forever. So, I had to write it.
Making my way downtown
Walking fast
Faces pass and I’m homebound
Staring blankly ahead
Just making my way
I’m making my way
Through the crowd
And I need you
And I miss you
And now I wonder
If I could fall into the sky
Do you think that time would pass me by
Cause you know I’d walk a thousand miles
If I could see you… tonight
It’s always time like these
When I think of you
And I wonder if you ever think of me
Cause everything’s so wrong
And I don’t belong living in your precious memory
Cause I need you
And I miss you
And now I wonder
And I, I don’t want to let you know
I, I drown I your memory
I, I don’t wanna let this go
I, I don’t….
Making my way downtown
Walking fast
Faces pass and I’m homebound
Staring blankly ahead
Just making my way
I’m making my way
Through the crowd
And I need you
And I miss you
And now I wonder
If I could fall into the sky
Do you think time would pass me by?
Cause you know I’d
Walk a thousand miles
If I could just see you…. Tonight
If I could fall into the sky
Do you think that time would pass us by
Cause you know I’d walk a thousand miles
If I could just see you
If I could just hold you…. Tonight
As I walk back home, I see nothing but the sidewalk in front of me. ”Hey! Watch it!”, I hear somebody shout as I bump into him. I really don’t care to apologize. I can’t wait to get back to the sweet solitude of my apartment. I wish my feet were quicker. Everything around me seems so blurry.
I collapsed exhausted onto my couch clutching the teddy bear you gifted me, tightly to my chest. Trying desperately to reduce the pain against my chest that tears my heart into pieces, like a cold gust of wind, freezing me to death. God! What I’d give to have your warm arms around me is beyond my comprehension. I’d give anything to feel your chest supporting my weakened and fragile body, to hear you breathe into my hair, nuzzle my neck, kiss me, whisper next to my ear. I miss you and my need for you multiplies day by day...
If only, I could rectify my mistake. I agree that I got a little carried away. The glamour of showbiz lured me away from the safety of the one and only person who cared about me, lived for me, went through a lot of crap, so that I could express my feelings. The one and only man who loved me.
I would give my life just for a chance; a chance to go back in time to make things better. Things were a mess the way I left them. No matter how far you are from me, I would walk, tirelessly, back into your life if you’d accept me. This is the only thought that seems to consume my mind tonight.
Snow is falling outside my window. I am reminded of Christmas when you gave me the Jetta bumper and pearl earrings as a Christmas present. I loved it when you surprise me.
Work is nothing compared to my daily shifts at the Crashdown. Everybody is quiet, minding his or her own business. I miss my friend Liz. I miss seeing Max mooning over Liz. Most of all, I miss my daily squabbles and fights with you; passionate make outs in the break room. I miss seeing you flipping burgers. Haunted by your every memory, sometimes I wonder if you miss me the way I do. I wonder if you think of me everyday or rather ignore and try to get over the past.
Today at work, it struck me. How could I have been so blind? Michael did not go back to his planet. He stayed back for me, for I was his home. All his life he had been living with the belief that there was something outside this world, which was better than him. How could I do this to him? He stayed back for me and I ran away from him. Broke up and came to New York. If he could sacrifice his dreams for me then so could I….
Enough of living in your memories. It is time that I go back home- not to the apartment or Roswell but to the arms of Michael Guerin. I packed my bags and caught a plane for Roswell. Everything is clear. I have found my destination. The only question in my mind is:
Has enough time passed to heal your wounds, patch up things? Mend the mess I made. Has time made you move on? Will time help us put our past quarrels and start afresh? Have a new beginning. I fear wish for only one thing. I wish that you still love me. Please do not let him move on to such an extent of replacing me with someone else.
The End.
Tonight (CC,M/M,TEEN, Maria POV) [COMPLETE]
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Tonight (CC,M/M,TEEN, Maria POV) [COMPLETE]
i came here with a load
and it feels so much lighter
now i met you
and it feels so much lighter
now i met you