Author: Karen
Rating: MATURE
Disclaimer: Oh, if only they'd pay me! Alas, they will not

Summary: Sequel to Searching for Liz Parker; Liz has a new gift - but why? Resumes about a month after the end of the last fic.
Part One
Liz Parker chewed on the end of her pencil, her brow furrowed in concentration. Before her, trapped under one hand, was the chemistry test for which she’d been studying for weeks. She knew the material – she could recite it in her sleep – but she was unable to dredge up any information now that it counted.
And the reason she was struggling was because she couldn’t focus on the test. Instead, she felt everything that was going on around her. The young man in the seat next to her was panicking, his anxiety riddled with self-doubt and self-reprimand; he hadn’t studied enough. The girl three seats over was breezing through the test, her emotions full of confidence and satisfaction.
The girl two seats ahead of Liz was upset, despondent, on the verge of depression. It was emotions like those that she couldn’t ignore. Immediately, her mind started forming the questions: Did the girl break up with her boyfriend? Had a relative died? Was she depressed enough to commit suicide? Was she clinical?
Liz shook her head, trying to block the girl’s anxiety and concentrate on her test. She’d read the same question at least a dozen times now. But every time she started to digest it, the nervousness of the boy beside her crowded her mind instead. She was only vaguely aware that people were starting to leave the lecture hall, that instead of being the first one done with her test, she was trailing far behind.
“Pencils down,” the professor called. “That’s time.”
Liz gulped. It couldn’t be. She put her pencil on her desktop and held up the test – she’d left more than half the questions blank. There was no way she was going to pass. Fighting tears and the urge to gag, she gathered her things and dropped the test on the professor’s desk as she left the room – but not before she saw the look in his eyes.
This past summer, Liz had been granted a much-coveted internship at the Woods Hole Oceanographic Institute in Massachusetts. Due to a personal crisis – the development of her new powers – she’d missed that internship and every faculty member at the school knew about it. They’d granted a wish to a budding young scientist only to have it inexplicably wasted. Liz had offered them no explanation other than she’d had health problems. She hadn’t convinced them.
Clutching her books to her chest, Liz bit back her tears again as she made her way into the bright New Mexico sun. She didn’t want to admit it, but she knew that her career at this school was finished. If she didn’t get her grades up, her career at any school was finished. Never did she think that she, Liz Parker, National Merit Scholar, would be on academic probation. But only a month into the semester, she was dangerously close to it.
Happiness, anticipation, blossoming love.
Those feelings should have been welcome to the person feeling them, but instead it only upset Liz more. She was passing a couple sitting on the steps, their manner cautious like two people who had met only recently. She was happy for them – but she just wanted to turn the floodgate off and feel only her own emotions for a change.
*****
“You’re making me fat, Michael Guerin.”
Michael looked up from his bed and spied Maria Deluca standing sideways before the mirror, baring her belly. He smiled. She wasn’t fat – she was merely putting on the weight she’d lost consuming a steady diet of Spaghetti-Os while living on the road with The Whits.
“Yep, you’re a tub,” Michael agreed, then returned his attention to the text book he was reading.
“Michael!” Maria shrieked, dropping her shirt. She was laughing, though, as she crawled onto the bed. “It’s all your fault. Cooking with cream and real butter.” She laid a quick kiss on his lips.
“That’s the way you’re supposed to do it,” he defended. “You think the great chefs of Europe use skim milk and Parkay margarine?”
“I don’t care about the great chefs of Europe,” she said, her eyes remaining on his lips, hers twisted into a playful smile. “I’m more interested in the great chefs of New Mexico.”
Michael rolled his eyes. “Maria, I’m hardly a great –“
He was silenced by another kiss from her. Soon the text book fell to the floor as he slid his fingers into her hair and returned her embrace. After a few all-too-brief moments, she pulled back from him.
“Where’s Isabel?” she asked.
He shrugged. “I don’t know.”
“When will she be home?”
“I don’t know.”
Maria sighed impatiently. “Do you think we have time to – you know.”
“I don’t know.” Michael loved the exasperated look that came over her face and he snorted a laugh. “She’s probably at school.”
Maria’s brow furrowed. “She’s always at school, it seems. Is everything okay with her?”
Michael shrugged again. “I guess. Why do you ask?”
Forgetting her romantic pursuit, Maria fell onto her back and looked up at the ceiling. “I don’t think she likes me being here.”
“Oh, Maria, please. That isn’t true. Why do you think that?”
“Well, for one – she’s never here.”
“Yes, she’s at school,” he repeated slowly.
“But all this time? Is she taking thirty credits or something?” Maria waved her hand in the air demonstratively. “I think she’s tired of me being here.”
Michael shifted on to his side and reached over to play with a strand of her hair, which was now back to its natural blonde. “I don’t think it’s you. I think maybe it’s us.”
Maria looked at him curiously. “Us?”
“Yeah. I mean, Max has Liz. I have you.”
“And Iz has nobody.”
Michael nodded. “I don’t think it’s the fact you’re here. I think it’s the fact she’s alone.”
Maria frowned. “I wish I knew someone…”
“Like an alien?” He shook his head. “Isabel knows she has to be careful, Maria. It may take her a very long time to find someone she can trust enough to let in.” He gave her a half-smile. “I got lucky on the first try.”
Maria smiled in return and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. “If you play your cards right, you could get lucky right now.”
*****
The urge to cry had left Liz by the time she walked to the apartment she and Max now shared. Instead, she felt empty inside, like the battle she was fighting was now hopeless. As she crossed the parking lot, she spied Max bouncing a basketball in the courts on the other side of the lot. He was wearing a pair of gray sweat shorts and an ill-fitting white tank. He dribbled the ball several times, then with perfect form took a shot; the ball went through the hoop touching only the net. Liz knew he wasn’t using his powers – Max was just that good.
As he chased down the ball, he spotted her approaching him. Grinning, he stuffed the ball between his elbow and hip and waved. Happiness, bliss, unadulterated love. Liz’s smile was genuine – she could always count on Max. Even during disagreements, she could still feel his love for her under it all.
“Hi, babe,” he said, leaning in and giving her a kiss. His skin was warm, damp with a light sheen of sweat.
“Hi,” she answered, accepting his enthusiastic embrace.
Max’s smile faded away when he realized she was less than happy. “So, how did the test go?” Concern, dread.
Liz looked away, her eyes settling on a man walking a dog in the distance. “Not so good, Max.”
Sympathy. Disappointment – not in her, but for her. “I’m sorry.”
She met his gaze. “I know you are,” she confirmed, her jaw set.
Understanding, caution. “Let’s go inside,” Max offered. “I’ll make you something to eat.”
As she followed him up the stairs, she found it amusing that Max was such a mother hen when she was hurting. It was always “Let me run you a bath” or “Let me get you a drink” or “Let me make dinner for you.” He was so sweet sometimes she felt guilty for being glum.
In the kitchen, he pulled out a chair for her, then went to the refrigerator to survey the contents. Liz sat, her gaze turning to the tile floor where she had once carved the whirlwind symbol with the end of a spoon. The mark was now gone – Renovations by Isabel – but Liz still looked for it. It was a reminder of the turning point in her life.
“How about something light before dinner?” Max suggested as he tipped his head to see what was in the back of the refrigerator.
“Sounds good,” Liz answered mechanically.
“Tuna?”
She nodded and Max began gathering the ingredients for tuna salad. The room was quiet as he stood at the counter and made two sandwiches. He placed one before Liz, then sat down opposite from her. Hopeful, eager to please.
Liz looked at the wheat bread and realized she really didn’t want anything to eat. Drawing in a deep breath, she said to the sandwich, “I’m going to fail out.”
Surprise. “What do you mean?” Max asked.
Liz lifted her head. “I didn’t even get half of the questions answered, Max. And what are the odds that I got all of the ones I did answer right?” She frowned and shook her head. “If I fail chemistry, I can just about forget a career in any science field.”
Max wiped his hands on his shorts. “Can you tell me what happened?” he asked carefully. “I know you knew the material.”
“I did,” she agreed, her gaze steady on his. “And then the kid next to me started to panic. Then all I could concentrate on was the fact he was panicking. When it wasn’t him, it was the suicide queen ahead of me.”
Max’s dark eyes were sad. “I’m sorry, Liz.”
“I know you are,” she repeated. “I know you are because I can feel it.”
“We’ll work on that,” he tried to reassure her. “We’ll work on getting you able to shut people out.”
“Nothing we’ve tried has worked,” she stated matter-of-factly. “Maybe this is just the way I am now. I just wish…” Her voice trailed off and she looked away from him, back to the floor where the whirlwind should be.
Reaching across the table, Max took her small hand in his. “You wish what, love?”
She met his gaze steadily. “I just wish that I could have had this ‘gift’ while Alex was still alive.”
Grief. “Liz –“
“No, Max. You don’t understand the guilt of knowing that maybe I could have known what was going on with him or with Tess. If I had been able to read their emotions, maybe he’d still be alive today. Why couldn’t this have happened to me then? Why is it happening to me now when all it’s causing is misery?”
Max released her hand and touched her hair, which was beginning to regain its former health. “I do know that guilt,” he said softly and Liz immediately shared that feeling. “But there are so many ‘what ifs’ when it comes to Alex’s death. What if I’d been closer to the accident site and able to get to him before he’d died? What if he’d come to one of us instead of going to confront Tess? You can’t beat yourself up about a power you didn’t have at the time and didn’t know you’d get in the future. I believe every thing has a time and a purpose.”
“What is my purpose, Max?” Liz asked, her stoic demeanor falling aside.
His fingers grazed her face. “In the greater scheme of things, I don’t know, Liz. I think it’s yet to be determined.” He smiled gently. “But for now, your purpose is to be with me, to let me help you work through all of these new things that are happening to you. Because I think right now that’s my purpose.”
She smiled back at him and took his hand in hers.
“As for my immediate purpose, I think I need a shower,” he laughed and Liz nodded her agreement. His expression turned devilish. “And I think your immediate purpose is to join me.”
Of course she relented to his request. As she followed him down the hallway, she hoped he was right. She hoped that there was a reason for everything that happened – and that the reason for her new power wasn’t to make her fail out of school or drive her crazy.
tbc
~~~~~~
It's not going to stay this angsty - I promise
