Elizabeth's Justice - M/L - [COMPLETE]

[nicola]

Based on a challenge by Mia Nora. That's all you get I'm sorry! This is a M/L fic but for the first chapters it will be mostly about Liz coming to terms with whats happened to her.
Disclaimer: The author of this fan fiction does not own any aspect of Roswell. Those rights belong to Melinda Metz, Jason Katims, WB, UPN, 20th Century Fox, etc. Disclaimer added by moderator.

Chapter One.

“My Grandmother always used to tell me that no matter what happened in life, no matter how sad and how sinister things got, fate always made up for it in one way or another.”

Liz glanced over her shoulder at her best friend’s pained face. She had her hands on her lap and her thumbs were pressed together nervously, Liz could tell she didn’t know what to say.

She continued, “When I was ten I was scared to go into my bedroom by myself in fear the robbers and murders would climb in my window. To make me feel safer, my grandmother would sit me on her knee and say, ‘sometimes bad things happen to us and there is nothing we can do to stop it. However, if we are brave we can always get through it and come out on the other side with pride.’
She used to try to make sure I knew that no matter what, I could get back up onto my feet again.”

Across the single hospital bed her friend lifted her hand and rested it on top Liz’s. She forced a small smile and then spoke, “Liz, I’m sorry I’m acting like this, it’s just this kind of thing happens in movies, not to my best friend.”

The footsteps and busy voices outside in the corridor carried into the room preventing them from silence. On the wall at the head of the room, there was a large window, which sprayed sunlight in across the white lino floor. Next to it, a grey sofa chair was pushed up against the wall facing the bed. On it lay Liz’s small book bag and her blue jersey.

Hanging on the wall at the head of the bed a painted picture of a pink flower was added in an attempt to make the room homier. There was a dresser next to the bed with a plastic cup of water resting on it and a black metal lamp with a single wire running across the clean surface.

The room smelt like faded disinfectant and something else that Liz did not recognize. The walls were a boring white color and the curtains hanging on the curtain track were grey like the sofa chair.

Liz tucked her hair behind her ears and swallowed. “I want to go home now,” she said.

Her friend slowly lifted herself up off the bed and brushed out her tan cord skirt. She rubbed her eyes and went over to the chair to collect Liz’s belongings. On their way out, she intertwined her fingers through Liz’s comfortingly.

“The police know now Chinca, they’ll find the bastard and he’ll regret what he did to you, you’ll see. Everything will be okay,” she said.

Liz did not speak as they walked down the corridor past all the other hospital rooms. She could see the other patients sitting on their beds out of her periphery; some were reading, some playing games, some doing nothing, but waiting to be better again.

Her mother was waiting for them at the entrance to the hospital. She forced a smile and kissed her daughter’s forehead. “I’ll make you some enchilada’s when we get home, your favorite.”

“Thanks mom,” Liz said. She hated how everyone was constantly looking out for her and wondering if she was going to break down. That was part of the reason she had taken so long to finally let her secret out in the first place.

“I’m going to stay over tonight,” Maria announced on the way to the car.

“It’s a school night,” Liz protested.

As though neither of them heard her, they continued talking. “We’ll hire some movies, maybe invite some of your other girlfriends over. Make a real girls night of it?” Her mother suggested. “You haven’t had one of those in a while.”

“Where’s dad?” Liz asked.

“And we can have carrots and dip so you don’t have to eat junk food like you hate,” Maria said. “I’ll get some herbal tea from my mom’s stash.”

“Oh and they can be olden day movies, we’ll rent them from the library like you always do. Is there any left that you have not seen? Oh well, I’m sure there is some you would like to see again.” Her mother almost seemed excited.

Liz sighed. “Actually I’d just like to have a shower and go to bed, I’m really tired.”

She knew they were just trying to look after her and make sure she was okay, but Liz wanted to pretend like nothing had happened. That everything was just normal. She was just a seventeen-year-old girl in her last year of college, going to graduate at the top of her class.

Her mothers smile faded. “Well if that’s what you really want, I mean we can have a girls night another time. I’ll call the school and tell them you won’t be coming in tomorrow and…”

“Why wouldn’t I be going to school tomorrow?” Liz asked. “I’m not sick, I’m fine… in fact I’m excellent.”

“Well I just thought…”

They reached the car. Liz turned to her mother and said, “Mom, I went to school yesterday and the day before that, I have been going to school since it happened. I’m fine, please, let’s just drop it.”

Deeply discouraged, her mother sighed and put her hands up in defeat. “Okay, I will leave you alone but I want you to talk to someone about it. The doctor gave me the number of a good council—“

“MOM!” Liz exclaimed. “No! Please, that will just make everything so much worse. I just want life to go back to normal. No councilors and no more doctors. I have had a hard long day and I do not need a repeat of it. I understand you just want to help, but you can help by just leaving me alone.”

Her mother stared at her blankly for several minutes, and then hopped in the car. Maria was already seated in the back seat. Liz got in next to her and rested her head on her shoulder in defeat.

“It’ll be okay,” Maria whispered. “We are all going to be here for you when you need us.”



Liz stared out her bedroom window at the rain pounding down on the pavement. The weather seemed to fit her mood lately— dark, depressing but necessary.

Lately her life had been a shambles and it was all because of one person. A person she did not even know, not even what they look like.

In her hand, she held the journal she had been keeping since she was twelve. As the years passed the more her handwriting, what she wrote about, and who she was changed. The entries varied from how much she had liked Troy Peterson to the more recent, plans for college and thoughts on the world around her. One event remained unwritten about and she did not know why but she couldn’t bring herself to let the words flow from her pen. She suspected it had something to do with her innocence being lost.

Innocence she had not been willing to give away.

Liz had always considered herself a decent person, someone people could rely on, someone you could trust. Lately she did not feel that way, she felt dirty, as if she constantly needed to go scrub herself clean. She would be lying if she said it wasn’t keeping her awake all night, the remembrance of his hands on her. Thin and sharp dirty like claws touching her where she didn’t want to be touched.

She may not have seen his face but she had felt his body, she had smelt him—that smell haunted her everyday.

All thoughts of anything else had been replaced by one event and that annoyed her. She used to think about schoolwork, and books, music, writing, anything, but now every second it was just constant torturing memories.

With a sigh, Liz got up off her wooden chair by the window and closed the curtains. She stumbled over to her bed and climbed under the covers. She fought to get comfortable for several minutes and then finally settled on her side facing the wall.

Yesterday, Maria her best friend, had managed to get her secret out of her. They had been sitting together in the cafeteria, Maria was ranting on about how Liz had been acting strange lately, and she was sick of her ignoring her.

Liz had broken down and told her everything right there. Maria demanded to know why she hadn’t said something sooner and wondered why she hadn’t gone to the police yet. They had instantly left the school and gone to her mother.

All morning today she had been sitting in the police office on an uncomfortable chair answering questions Sergeant Yield said were procedure.

“Where did he approach you?” He had asked.

“I was going for my afternoon run like I do every second day,” Liz replied. She couldn’t bring herself to say anymore, it was difficult to talk about, and it made it worse to have all the sympathetic eyes of the police on her.

Though she hadn’t been much help, the information she had been able to give on his physique had led back to one man who was already being chased around Southern America for two first-degree murders and several thefts. Both of the murders were girls much the same age as her that had been killed and then raped. This led the police to believe he had killed them because they put up too much of a fight.

It terrified her to know she could have been killed, she had several bruises as it was but that was nothing compared to what those other two innocent girls had been put through. Her thighs still held purple hand marks where he had held them and the cut in her lip and eye brow throbbed 24/7 every day.

Everyone kept telling her that they would catch him before he got a chance to strike again and that made Liz wonder what the court would do to him once they had him. Surely, for such a trail of crime he would be sentenced to life imprisonment or even death. Liz just wanted to make sure he would not come near her ever again or any other person for that matter.

She knew that until he was caught she would never feel completely comfortable. She was constantly on the edge afraid to go anywhere on her own, terrifying thoughts always running through her head.

Slowly Liz drifted off into a troubled sleep plagued with nightmares.

She woke up several hours later at the sound of voices. She was surprised she had been asleep at all but, even if it were so she knew she wouldn’t be enjoying such a gift again tonight.

She rubbed her eyes and eased her body out of its stiff position. Once she was up and her mind was functioning appropriately she recognized the voices and figured out where they were coming from. They were just distance rumbles coming through the wall but if she opened the door, she could hear what was being said properly. She realized she didn’t care very much and gave up straining her ears.
Dejectedly she got up and shrugged on her nightgown to keep the cold from attacking her petite body.

She opened her bedroom door and peered out into the hallway. The light wasn’t on but her parent’s bedroom door was open and the light from their lamp illuminated a streak across the carpet.

Liz headed in the direction of the kitchen, suddenly feeling a prominent craving for food. She switched on the light and pattered over to the refrigerator to search for something to fill her stomach. She began pulling out all types of sandwich fillings- chicken, lettuce, beet root, cheese, mustard, mayonnaise, avocado, ham, spring onion, the table was instantly covered with foods.

She could hear her mother sobbing in her bedroom and her ears perked up in sudden interest and worry.

“I’m just so worried about her,” Nancy cried. “How could he do this to our baby? How could a man like that find our Lizzie and do this to her at such a young age? She doesn’t need this worry and she definitely doesn’t deserve it!”

“Come now Nancy, calm down. I’m upset and furious too but they’ll find him and he’ll be locked up as he deserves. The only thing we can do now is be strong for her and let it be known we’ll be here for her when she needs us.”

Liz closed her eyes and sucked in a breath; she didn’t want to hear anymore. Maybe the pounding of her heart would become loud enough to drown it all out.

“I haven’t even seen her cry Jeff! I know she’s holding it in, she’s being so strong.”

Liz piled up the food she had gathered onto the piece of wholegrain bread in front of her. When she was done, it was very tall and tilting to one side like the leaning tower of Pisa. She couldn’t pick it up so she got down onto her knees on the ground so she could be face to face with it. In one quick movement she leaned forward and took a big, munch out of it.

She realized she must look like a lunatic but she didn’t care—who was going to see her anyway.

“Jeff, do you realize this is going to scar her for her whole life? This isn’t something you forget about over time.”

“I know Nancy, but there are so many people that love her and will help through this. Life will go back to normal, you’ll see.”

As much as Liz hoped that were true, she had a feeling it wasn’t going to be that simple.

Chapter two.

“So you are aware that the student body have ways of finding these things out right?” Maria searched Liz’s face for any sign of hesitation towards going inside.

“Maria, I can’t just not go to school. If I am going to graduate at the top of my class I can’t miss out on any work. If the students hear about what happened, so be it, I don’t care.”

Maria didn’t know who Liz was trying to fool. Certainly not her. She knew that Liz was hiding her real fear and though it hurt that she couldn’t even open up to her best friend, she would give her time. They always say time helps heal wounds right? Well she hoped it was true in this situation.

They stepped through the double doors and found themselves in the hallways of West Roswell High. Nothing had changed, and why would it have? The walls were plastered with posters advertising the upcoming production of Romeo and Juliet that the drama group were performing in four weeks. The lockers, a newly painted bottle green but nonetheless grafettied on already. The students, some were hurrying to get things done before the bell, others were hanging around in groups talking with their friends.

Liz pushed her black sunglasses up to rest on the crown of her head and examined the room properly for the first time in her life. At the end of the hallway directly in front of her there was a big banner slapped across the wall, it said, have you done one thing for someone else today?

She walked past that thing every day and she never even bothered to notice it. Why she was opening her eyes now was a puzzle to her, she just vowed from now on she was going to be more observant.

“Liz!”

Liz turned her head to see Alex Whitman, her other best friend, hurrying towards her. When he reached her he looked kind of awkward like he didn’t know what to say. Liz hoped it wasn’t going to be like that all day long, with people not knowing how to act around her. She was still Liz.

“I heard about—“

Liz shuddered. “I’m fine Alex, I really am. How was your morning?”

Confusion passed over his face and Liz watched him share a glance with Maria. For heavens sake, she thought annoyedly.

“I have English,” she said. “And I don’t want to be late. I’ll see you later.”

After school when she was in her bedroom she was unbearibly bored. She didn’t know what to do with herself, she wanted to do something, anything, other then sit and THINK. Thinking was definitely not a good thing to do right now.

She decided she would reorganize her whole bedroom. First she moved all her furniture, her double bed was now postioned by the window, still against the wall because she wasn’t comfortable being in the middle of the room. Her large dresser and couch were where her bed used to be and she removed all the movie posters from her walls.

In the end she didn’t like what she’d done but was too tired to move it all back. She collapsed onto her bed and used the remote to turn on her CD player. She lay there listening to one of her favourite bands, Matchbox Twenty, until her mother called out that dinner was ready.

There wasn’t much conversation throughout dinner and afterwards everyone went their separate ways. Liz watched an old love story for two hours and then fell asleep on the couch. The next morning her neck was killing her and she was freezing so she quickly went and jumped into a steamy shower.

She inspected her body, it felt foreign to her. Something about life and routine didn’t seem adequate enough for her anymore. She was almost expecting something to happen to set her all off track but she knew it was just her reaction to her attack. She hoped the feelings would end soon so she could start enjoying her days again.

She turned off the shower and climbed out. Her wet feet were slippery on the misted tile floor but she managed to make her way over to the mirror without falling on her ass. She used the towel hanging on the rack to clear the mirror and then she stared at her naked refection for several minutes.

Why did she feel different? Older some how.

Her long dark hair was still the same length, her eyes still as round, her stomach still as thin. She ran her hand through her hair and down her neck. Quietly she started to sing to herself,

“Let music take your mind, just re-listen you will find.
You’re going to fly away…”

She had no idea why that song was stuck in her head but it wouldn’t go away. Gwyneth Paltrow wasn’t someone she liked, she was beautiful, skinny, could act, and sing. No one should be graced with that much talent, it just wasn’t fair on the less fortunate.

Liz dried herself as much as she could and then went and got dressed.

“Ahh! Let go of me please! No! Stop, please!”

She shuddered as a memory over took her mind. She sat down on the end of her bed and tried to catch her breath. Was this what it was going to be like from now on? Was she going to feel this pathetic always?

“God damn you!” She screamed. She got up and picked up the object closest to her. In a fit of anger, frustration, and hurt she threw it at the wall and it smashed into several pieces. “Why did you do this to me? I was happy!” She yelled.

She felt tears prick her eyes but she would not cry. She would not give the bastard the satisfaction of hurting her.

She turned on her stereo to full volume and blasted it so she couldn’t even hear herself think. She just wanted to not think for two minutes. She just wanted to not hurt for two minutes.

“If you want to, I can save you. I can take you away from here. So loney inside, so busy out there, and all you wanted was somebody who cared…”

She sang along with the lyrics and spun around in circles. Circles, circles, circles…

“Liz?” Her mother banged on the door. “Are you okay, Liz? Open the door would you?”

Liz ignored her. She felt so alone, she felt so violated.

“I can take you away from here, so loney inside, so busy out there and all you wanted was somebody who cared. Please can you tell me, so I can finally see, where you go when you’re gone…”

She collapsed to the floor and buried her face in the sheep skin rug at the end of her bed. She clenched her fists and unclenched them. “No please, no please…don’t do this to me, please…”



“Happy Birthday!” Nancy cried as soon as Liz emerged from her bedroom. “You are eighteen today, can you believe it? How old is that?”

“Very old,” Liz said with no emotion. With all the commotion she had almost forgotten what the date was today.

“You won’t believe what we brought for you,” Jeff, her father said before taking a sip of his coffee. “You’ve been going on about having one since you were sixteen.”

“We decided you really deserved it now that you are going to college, you’ll need one too.” Nancy handed her a pair of keys. “No daughter of mine is going to be catching buses around Boston.”

“Oh, my goodness,” Liz said. She headed towards the front door and flung it open to see her brand new car parked in the drive way. “I can’t believe you guys did this…”

“So you like it?” Maria asked. Liz hadn’t even noticed her heading up the drive way. “I helped them pick it out!” She cried.

Liz’s eyes widenned. “It’s beautiful, just what I wanted. Thank you so much.”

Liz hugged her parent’s and then Maria.

The telephone started to ring. Her father spoke, “I’ll just go get that, Liz why don’t you go check out the inside?”

“Okay,” Liz said. She walked over to the drivers side and used the keys to unlock the door. Maria hopped in the passanger side. All most on cue they both turned to look at each other and smiled brightly.

Maria noted, even when Liz smiled there seemed to be a hollow look in her eyes. Like she wasn’t completely letting the joy through her skin. She wanted to see her best friend laugh again.

“I’m taking you to the French cafetaria you love so much for breakfast okay? I’m paying.”

Liz bit her lip. “Really?”

“Yes, so start thinking about what you want to order right now.”

Liz turned her head to see her father come out the front door and say something to her mother. They shared a pained look and then turned to look at her. They didn’t expect her to be watching and quickly looked away so they wouldn’t have to face her expression.

“What’s going on?” Liz asked quietly. Maria looked at her and then back at her parents. “What’s going on?” Liz asked louder.

She got out of the car and walked towards her parents. “What’s happened?” She demanded.

“Nothing darling, how’s the car?” Nancy forced a smile.

“Don’t lie to me,” Liz said. “I know something’s happened. Dad who was on the phone?”

“It’s your birthday Liz, it’s a day to be happy. Why don’t you go to breakfast with Maria, and then when you get back we’ll go to the mall and do some shopping?” Liz wondered how her mother managed to hold her fake smile in place for so long.

“I’ll go after you’ve told me who was on the phone.”

With a sigh Jeff began speaking, “it was Sergeant Yield. They’ve caught him.”



“Liz, how are you doing? I mean how are you really doing?” Maria asked. She picked at the French crapes in front of her.

Liz gulped back the bile in her mouth and turned her gaze away from her fruit salad to look at Maria. “Honesty?” She asked.

“Honestly,” Maria repeated.

“Honesty,” Liz said. “I’m doing terrible.”

“I thought so,” Maria said. “Liz you know you need to open up and get it out. You are keeping it in, that must be killing you.”

“It just won’t leave my mind, it keeps me awake all night long. I just want to pull my brain out of my head and squeeze all the bad memories out. I don’t know what to do Maria, I’m going insane. I can feel myself drifting further and further away from everyone. Everywhere I turn I can smell him at the end of my nose, when I’m alone I can feel him touching me.”

Maria was glad she was finally opening up and getting some of her hurt out. “I read somewhere that confronting the person can help speed up the recovery process.”

Liz’s bottom lip trembled, she bit it to try and hide it. “I can’t Maria, there is no way I can face him… not now. It will kill me.”

“It was just a suggestion, you don’t have to do it.”

Liz thought about it for several moments. “No, maybe it will be easier now that he’s been caught and isn’t out there anymore.”

“But if it isn’t, will you work your way up to facing him?’

“I…” Liz stuttered. “I don’t know.”

Chapter Three

Liz threw her little purple stress ball at the wall and when it bounced back, she threw it again. She had been spending a lot of time in her room alone lately; she didn’t feel like doing anything else even if it did bore her to death. Her room had never been so tidy in her whole life.

Her mother was worried that she wasn’t getting enough exercise. Liz used to go for a run four times a week but when October the 9th happened she now couldn’t go anymore. Her mother suggested they join a gym but Liz said no, she didn’t see the point.

October the 9th was her new way of expressing ‘the’ day of the attack without actually having say it. She thought it had a nice ring to it.

He had been locked up for one week now but she was still in her constant state of paranoia. Only now was she starting to think maybe facing her fears would, in fact, help her. At this stage she was about ready to jump of a bridge if it meant the horrifying thoughts would stop.

She was terrified, no terrified didn’t even seem to describe adequately how scared she was to face him. What would she say to him? Would she have to say something to him? Would he say anything to her?

She kept playing what could happen repeatedly in her head. Each time it ended with her either running off petrified because of something he’d said, or him somehow breaking free of the guards and harming her again. In her mind he was a hideous man, like a cockroach, hairy, slimy and disgusting to look at. Something that made you shudder just to think about.

Part of her did want to know more about him, what his name was, how old he was and what he really looked like. She didn’t know why but it would probably trace back to some physiological thing she didn’t understand.

Maria offered to come with her to the confinement if she decided to go but Liz knew that if she did take the next step and do it she would do it on her own. It was something she wouldn’t want others to witness.

There was a knock at the door and a few seconds later her mother popped her head inside. “Liz?” She said. “Can I come in please?”

Liz nodded and looked down at the stress ball in her hands. She wondered how hard it would be to pop if she tried to squeeze it as hard as she could. She bet it would take her forever to do.

Her mother put a tray of pumpkin soup down on the floor next to her and then took a seat on the end of the bed. There was a piece of olive bread on the tray that had been buttered and sprinkled with spices, it made Liz’s stomach twirl with nausea. Normally she would have liked to eat it. Normally.

“You’ve been in here for three hours,” Nancy spoke quietly. “What have you been doing?”

Liz knew it wasn’t a good idea to admit she had been sitting in the same spot doing the same thing for that whole time. She lied instead. “Homework, I’m ahead in my homework.”

“Well that’s good,” Nancy said. “Maria called, she told me to tell you she wants to stay tomorrow night.”

“Cool.”

There was a long silence. Liz threw the stress ball at the wall again. And again…

“Liz I’m taking you to Dr. Samantha Gregory tomorrow,” her mother finally said. “I won’t take no for an answer, you don’t have a choice in the matter.”

“Okay,” Liz said. She wasn’t going to try and resist it, she knew she needed help. She needed to feel human again.

Nancy was surprised by her daughter’s easy attitude but she was glad she didn’t have to convince her it was a good thing to do. She stood up and went and kissed her daughters neck. “I love you,” she said. “We’ll leave at 9:00, have a good sleep.”

If I have any at all, Liz thought with shame.



“Close your eyes and we’ll take this as slow as we can okay?” Samantha touched Liz’s arm comfortingly. “Take deep breaths and clear your mind. Are doing that?”

“Yes,” Liz replied.

“Good. Now we’ll do this in stages. The first stage I want you to tell me what you were doing before you left the house for your run and how you felt. The the next stage can be when you suspected you were in trouble. Stage three I want you to express how you felt when he pulled you into his car and then stage four I need you to tell me what you remember about him and how you feel towards him now. Is that okay?”

“Yes,” Liz replied. NO!!!

“Are you ready to start?” Samantha asked.

“Yes.” NO!!!

“Don’t feel as if you have to do anything you can’t and don’t want to do. Just go at your own pace and say what you feel comfortable saying.”

“Okay,” Liz said. She sucked in a deep breath and rubbed her temples with her fingers, an old habit she had inherited from her father that they both did when they were stressing out.

“It was around five-twenty in the afternoon, I had had school that day and been out with Maria that afternoon. I usually go for my run towards the evening because it’s cooling down and the sun is shining across the land. It’s such a beautiful orange color.” Liz hesitated but after a short while continued. “No one was home, mom was at the supermarket and dad hadn’t come home from work so I got changed into my running clothes and then headed out.

“It was really nice to begin with, the cool breeze was flowing across my face and I marvled at how much I was enjoying the feeling today. I was about half way on the circuit I set myself when a man… in a brown old crusty car drove past and tooted at me. I ignored him and continued looking down at the road. A little while later he drove past me again and tooted again, I didn’t acknowledge him. I figured he must be some guy being a perve, it’s not like it was the first time I’d been tooted at.

“I continued to run but when I heard the crackling of gravel under tires I stopped. Just when I was about to turn around to see who it was he hit me on the back of the head with what I’m guessing was a wood plank.”

Liz stopped, Samantha could see her eyes darting around under her eye lids like she was really replaying what had happened. She wrote down what she had heard and tried to be as supportive as she could. “It’s okay Liz, take your time. This is hard for you, I don’t expect you to have a break through in our first session.”

Liz sucked in a shaky breath and she whipped the back of her hand across her eyes. “I…” she started. She didn’t think she could do this. “I remember my legs buckled and I fell to the gravel ground. It hurt…” She sighed. “My ankle and elbow scraped across the stones...” There was a long pause then she spoke again, “can I stop?”

She suddenly opened her eyes. “I can’t do this, it’s too hard…please.”

“You are doing so well, just a little bit more. You can do it. I’m here, I’m trying to help you. I know that you will feel so much better when it’s out in the open.”

Liz’s eyes glazed over and she rubbed them with her fists. She wouldn’t give the bastard satisfaction of tears. No way.

She told herself she could do it and mentally shook herself for being so weak. She could do this, it was just talking… he wasn’t going to hurt her again. He was locked up and would never get to her again.

She rolled her eyes and clenched her hands into fists. “I can do this,” she said.

“You can do this,” Samantha repeated.

Liz closed her eyes again and licked her lips. “After I fell… I tried to crawl away but he grabbed my feet and pulled me up through the car door.” A sob escaped Liz’s lips but she would not let tears fall. “He grabbed me and held me down, I screamed! I tried I really did. I screamed and begged him to leave me alone but he started pulling down my shorts!” Liz’s eyes flung open again and she started to sob. “I can’t do this! I can’t! I want to go home, please…”

She scratched at her eyes making sure she wouldn’t cry, she would not cry.

“It’s okay Liz, it’s okay you don’t have to say anymore.” Samantha rubbed her arm and looked at her sympathetically. “You’ve done so well, you should be proud of the progress you’ve made today.”

Liz did not feel proud at all. She buried her face in her hands and sobbed dry tears. Her eyes stung at all the effort she was going through to stay composed.

“Do you think we should skip to stage four? You tell me how you feel about him, express everything that’s going through your mind. Close your eyes and take deep breaths,” Samantha said.

Liz bit her lip, she hated herself for being so weak. She felt so stupid.

“Close your eyes,” Samantha repeated.

Liz did as she was instructed and closed her eyes and took deep breaths. “What do I do now?” She asked.

“Picture what ever you relate to him and how it’s been for you since what he did. Tell me how it makes you feel. Tell me anything you feel.”

Liz didn’t know if that was such a good idea but she would do it if it would help her feel better. “I feel hatred,” she started. “I hate him for what he did to me and I want him to have everything given back to him.” Her voice cracked but she continued on bravely. “And I feel sad, I feel as sad as I did when my Grandmother died. I’m sorry that I wasn’t strong enough to get him away from me, I wish I could have! I wish that so much. I feel confusion, how could he kill two other girls? Why didn’t he kill me?” She cried out in pain. “I want to know how a person could do such a thing to another person. I want to know what I did to deserve such a thing to be inflicted on me.”

Liz suddenly sprung to her feet and grabbed her coat. “I’m sorry I can’t do this anymore. I have to go,” she said. She left the room before Samantha could even utter a word of protest. Her mother was in the waiting room and jumped to her feet when she saw Liz heading in her direction. She opened her mouth to ask how it went but Liz stormed right past her and out to the car.

When she was finished talking to Samantha Liz’s mother went out to the car and found Liz with her head tilted to one side and her eyes closed. The music in her car was blasted to it’s loudest volume and her lips moved silently to the words.

“Liz,” Nancy said. “Are you okay darling?”

“I’m fine,” Liz said. She turned the music down and turned the keys in the ignition to start the car. Her mom buckled her seat belt in the passanger seat and silently they drove home. When they got there Liz went straight to her room and to her little purple stress ball.



“It’s made it worse,” Liz whispered in Maria’s ear. “Samantha’s ‘stages’ theory just made everything I feel more obvious to me.”

Maria sighed. “You want to go see him don’t you?”

“Yes,” Liz said. “But not yet, I can’t just yet. I have to prepare myself for it.”

“Do you want me to come with you?”

“No,” Liz said. “It’s something I have to do on my own.”

[nicola]

Chapter 4

Liz sat in her new car staring at the wire gates in front of her. Her hands gripped the steering wheel so her knuckles were white and her veins popped out in her wrists.

Her breaths came in and out of her mouth in shallow puffs, like she had had a work out and was now panting from exhaustion.

Outside it was dark, never mind that it was 10:45 in the morning. The grey sky continued to drop buckets of rain that thundered down on the car. Liz felt as if she were the only one getting wet, like fate knew where was going today and decided to make a wet appearance.

Her windscreen wipers swished back and forth, not really doing anything to keep the water off the window. The noise they were causing was the only thing Liz could hear other then her own heart beat. Her own loud rugged breaths ripped through her lungs painfully burning her throat and stinging her dry lips on the way out.

This was the second day she had spent sitting in her car outside the confinement. Yesterday, Saturday, she had been in the same place for several hours. Just waiting… growing strength to go inside. Yesterday she hadn’t been able to do it, but today she would. Nothing could stop her today she was determined.

Nevertheless still she sat with tears stinging her eyes but not falling. Her hands were numb from the cold and her nose was red from the tissue paper she had been using to wipe her runny nose.

Liz slowly eased her hands off the driving wheel and leaned over to pop open the glove box. It flung open quickly startling her in her jumpy state. She sucked in a deep breath and wrapped her fingers around the little tube of lip-gloss she had been searching for. She unscrewed the lid and rested it on her lap while she applied the spicy fruit mixture to her flaky dry lips. Then she put the lid back on and put the tube in her pocket so she could use it later if she needed too.

She closed the glove box and looked in the review mirror to check the back seat. She had been doing that a lot while she sat in the car, like she was expecting him to be sitting there with his hands on his lap and a grin on his mouth. The back seat was empty, as it should be, and clean because of its lack of usage.

“I’m sick of this,” Liz said to herself suddenly breaking the silence. “It’s just a person, get over it.”

She unbuckled her seat belt and it slid back into its plastic holder while she tightened her red scarf around her neck. She looked in the review mirror again, this time to check her appearance, and then turned the windscreen wipers off. Slowly she clicked the door free and kicked it open fully with her foot. Then, loosing her nerve, reached out into the rain, and slammed it closed again.

“I can’t do this,” she said to herself. The rain water dripped down the interior of the driver’s door and Liz wiped away as much as she could of it before it dripped down in-between the seat. She let out a growl of frustration and rubbed her temples to clear her mind. Suddenly her cell telephone blared to life and startled her right to the bones; it took her several seconds to calm her heart down before she answered it.

“Hey Liz,” Alex’s gentle friendly voice soothed her.

“Oh hey… Alex,” Liz said. She was so glad for the distraction.

“How’s it going?” He knew where she was and thought she might need some support.

Liz sighed. “I’m still in my car, I don’t think I can do this Alex, maybe I should just go home.”

“No,” Alex said surprisingly. “Liz, you need to do this. I know in your head you must be listing the different reasons not to go inside but let me just tell you that once you do, you will be so glad you did. When he sees you he’s going to regret instantly what he did and you’ll feel a big weight lift off your shoulders because you were strong enough to confront him. I love you and I know you can do this, just remember that. What he did is in the past and it’s time to move on, you are going to go in there and you are going to show him that you are over what he did.”

Liz closed her eyes while he spoke and let his soothing voice calm her nerves. “Thank you,” her voice cracked.

“I’ll be here when you get back and don’t forget, no one has more faith in you then me. I know you’ll do it, you are the strongest person I know.”

“Okay,” Liz said. She sucked in a breath. “I’ll see you later Whitman.”

“I’ll see you later Parker.”

Liz put her cell telephone back in her glove box and then grabbed the door handle again. This time she flung it open and hopped out as quickly as she could so she wouldn’t chicken out. She slammed the door behind her and shivered at the feel of the cold rain in her hair and on her cheeks.

“It’s now or never,” she muttered to herself and then slowly made her way over to the gate. Her heart thundered in her chest quickly. Boom, boom, boom… boom… boom…



Max Evans stared at his sisters perfectly made up face that was now wet from her insistant tears. She stood up from her chair and pressed her fingers to the glass in a loving gesture.

“I’ll see you,” she said quietly and then turned and headed away. Max saw her stop walking when she reached the officer at the door. A short woman with long brown hair walked in nervously and stepped out of her way so his sister could walk through. Instead of quickly leaving, Isabel spoke the the uniformed man, ignoring the other girl.

“I wouldn’t get too used to seeing my brother in here, he is innocent and my father is one of the best lawyers in Boston. You’ll see, he’ll be free in no time but you will be sorry for making him stay in here.” Her voice was deep with hurt and she glared evily at the guard as though he had been the man incharge of bringing her brother in. The guard said nothing and his sister sauntered away down the corridor and out of sight.

“Excuse me,” the other woman said quietly. “I’m here to see uh, Max Evans. Would you be able to show me who he is?”

The officer nodded and motioned for her to follow him. They walked silently down to the end stall and then stopped directly in front of him. He stared at the girl in interest, she was looking at the ground, terrified of turning her head to look at him.

“Max,” the officer said looking at him. “Quite popular with the ladies today aren’t we?”

“It seems so,” Max replied through the glass. The officer walked away leaving the girl standing by herself. She wouldn’t look at him for several minutes and then finally, after she sucked in a deep, what appeared to be painful, breath she lifted her head and glared straight at him. Max wasn’t sure what passed over her stunning face but it resembled surprise.

She didn’t say anything but chose to take a seat and continue staring at him.

Max stared back, highly intrigued and mystified by the beautiful girl. Her face was perfectly sculptured with full red lips and a small feminine nose. Her eyes were what made her special though, they were large and round with long dark curled eye lashes. They were deep brown pools of mystery that showed her emotion, Max felt compelled to turn away at the terror, anger, and devastation she directed at him.

Her long brown hair hung just above her high breasts, it would normally have been silky and soft to touch but it was wet from the rain and was stringy and curly clinging to her damp cheeks. She wore a red scarf around her neck and a black wooley sweater under her leather jacket. She was petite and to Max she appeared to be the most attractive woman he had laid his eyes upon. He was hopelessly fond of her before she even opened her mouth.

When he could gather his witts he opened his mouth and spoke to her.

“If you don’t mind me asking,” he said, “who are you?”

She blinked once and pronounced her name perfectly with a sweet strawberry voice. “I am Liz Parker.”

Max swallowed. “Elizabeth?” He asked offering a different choice of name.

“Not to you,” she replied coldly.

Max’s breath caught in his throat but just as quickly as it stopped, it started again. He just realized who the girl must be.

And there it was, he thought. Fate had given and then taken away his first possible true love in a duration of two minutes.



The room Liz was in held seven booths, two others were occupied by women talking to males behind the glass. One appeared to be in her late forties and the other as young as she was. The smell in the air was a mixture of damp clothing, shuddering cold, and rotting leaves. Although the room was used frequently it held the awful feeling of stillness and silence.

Liz lifted her gaze from the dirty concrete floor and lay her eyes upon her raper for the first time in her life. Many feelings flooded her senses but if she were to pick the most evident it would have to have been surprise.

In her mind she had pictured a horrible man. A man that was as grotesque as a pile of dung but as much as she hated to admit it, she was terribly wrong. Before her sat a man, who looked as innocent and as shy as she was, with a well formed, handsome face.

He sat up straight and proper, not slouched, which gave the impression of many years of eating at a family dinner table with inforced manners. His hair was cleanly cut and styled so that if he had had gel his short fringe could have been spiked up like the latest fashion. His jaw was straight and strong and presented Liz with the feeling of power, he was strong and very much capable of protecting himself. His lips were a curved, perfect shape like they had been painted on by a very talented portrait artist. He appeared to Liz like someone out of a magazine.

His eyes were were feminine but masculine at the same time. The eye lashes, very long and thick like a womans, but the amber lakes with specks of gold were all man. Like his jaw, he pieced together to give off an aura of strength. All this without even seeing his pysical build which topped off his athletic look, with full developed muscles and a firm stomach.

Liz tore her eyes away and sat down nervously. She placed her trembling hands on her lap and crossed her feet together to try and keep herself from getting up and running away too quickly. She bit her lip and tasted the earlier applied lip gloss on her tongue. It tasted like wax.

As much as the man in front of her didn’t fill her expectations she looked at him with a hatred she didn’t know she had possessed. All her pain, all her longing to be normal again, was all because of this man and nothing his appearance said would change the disgust she felt towards him.

A lump gathered in her throat when he spoke to her. Did she have to reply? Did she want to reply?

She did.

“I am Liz Parker,” she said. She wanted him to know who she was so he would stop looking at her like a normal teenage boy would to another attractive teenage girl. Her thought’s drifted back to the evening he had pulled her into his car and forced her into things against her will. When he asked her if she was called Elizabeth too, she snapped at him in hatred. Like he deserves, she reminded herself.

The look of slow painful recognition that spread over his face was something Liz knew she would never forget. The look of absolute dreed flashed in his eyes so quickly he stopped in mid breath. She almost expected him to exclaim, “oh my God!”

He didn’t. His eyes filled with sympathy and when he caught Liz’s gaze it was like they were having a very deep conversation with their eyes. She shuddered and looked away, unable to take the intenseness of what he was thinking. She decided she didn’t want to get to know him, that would make her feel close to him. She didn’t want that, she wanted to feel as far away from him as possible.

Part of her told her differently and that caused her to think of the blonde woman who had spoken to the officer at the door when she walked in. Had she been speaking about Max Evans? No other male was in the room so she must have, but the woman had seemed so sure. Her persuasive attitude had almost made Liz agree with her before even meeting the man she was talking about. Was Max Evans innocent? Could he be?

She glanced back at the man who held his head in his hands. He still held the look of innocence in him and she considered that maybe they had caught the wrong man.

“No,” she suddenly said outloud. It was by accident but Max looked up at her expecting her to continue speaking. When she didn’t he blinked and sat back in his chair. No, she repeated in her mind. He did do it, other wise that would mean he’s still out there. Max Evans rapped me, she thought. It was him. A tremor ran down her back and she fought the urge to leave.



Max couldn’t believe someone could hurt someone as beautiful as Liz. She was so tiny and innocent, definitely too young to be put through what she had been. He felt like he knew her personally just by looking at her. He could just open his mouth and tell you everything about her.

She had a presence about her, he had felt it as soon as he saw her. Even though she looked at him with terror and hatred, she held a friendliness that made you feel you could easily confide in her and she would easily trust you.

No one deserved to have a part of themselves stolen, but this girl, not only did she not deserve it, he would have died just to stop it from taking place. He didn’t even know her and that was how he felt so just imagining what her family and friends must think, it clamped his heart like a cold hand.

To make matters worse, they all thought he had done it. Not only them, but she did too. He could see her hands trembling in her lap and he wondered how long it had taken for her to build the courage to come here. To see him. Her raper.

He swallowed and rested his head in his hands again in disappointment.

He heard her chair slide backwards and he looked up as she stood from her seat. Her eyes were glazed with tears and her bottom lip was quivering. She didn’t say anything and stepped backwards as she prepared to leave. He wanted to do something to take the pain off her face and he fought with what to say. She walked one step towards the door and he said her name quickly, stopping her and causing her to turn her head back to look at him.

Her disgusted look made him feel like the lowest person alive. To her, he was the lowest person alive. He swallowed back the saliva in his mouth and it struggled to go down his now clamped up throat.

“I’m sorry,” he croaked out while looking her right in the eyes.

Surprise showed on her face but it disapeared quickly and as much as he could tell she was fighting it, a single tear dripped down her smooth cheek. She turned on her heals and walked out leaving Max to sit, dumbfounded and hurting for her. Soon the officer came and led him back to his lonely cell.



Liz ran to her car through the rain and slammed the car door behind her as soon as she hopped in. She stared at the rain pounding down on the windscreen and clenched her hands together on her lap.

Her throat was full of saliva, her nose full of snot, her mind full of everything, and it was her breaking point. She finally let out the pure devasted sob of pain and let the tears fall down.

Chapter Five

The rain had stopped and the sun had come out and was now drying the land right before her eyes. She rubbed the goose bumps on her arms and brought her legs up to her chest to keep them warm but it didn’t seem to help the chill that was plaguing her body.

“So you are telling me you are glad you went?” Alex asked. He wrapped his arm around his friend’s shoulder and drew her close.

“Yes,” she replied. “It’s just… I’m so confused.”

“Confused how?”

“I don’t know… he just… I just…” She sighed. “I don’t know!”

She looked down at the tartan skirt she was wearing and ran her index finger along the lines absentmindedly. She sucked in a deep breath and then looked up and out across the lawn in front of her. When she was little she used to come around to Alex’s house and they would play football in this very yard; those were the best times. His mother would bring them strawberry ice cream and they would eat it while swinging on the little swings at the back fence. The swings still stood and the toys on the yard remained, only instead of being left out by Alex they were left out by his little sister Anna.

Alex smiled. “Liz you are the best I’ve seen you since October the 9th, some of the color has come back to your cheeks. I know that trip benefited you, so what you are trying to say is… I think I’m recovering.”

Liz rolled her eyes at her friend but couldn’t hide the ends of her mouth that twitched with the need to smile. If she had gained anything from what had happened to her, it had been an even closer relationship with her two best friends. They had always been there for her through her miniscule problems like a guy being a jerk or an argument with her parents. But now that something big had happened she knew that not even the hard things would scare them off. It made her feel loved and because she felt loved, she felt better.

“Go on say Liz,” Alex said. “But say, I know I’m recovering.”

“Alex, come on.”

“It’s a new form of therapy, trust me. Say it and within a week you’ll be back to your old self.”

Liz frowned. She was her old self, did they not see her as she used to be? Her feelings toward herself were different, when she looked at herself she felt different, but she didn’t think others saw the changes too. Well, she had hoped they hadn’t. The normal her would say a cheeky reply to Alex’s teasing but she didn’t know if she had it in her.

“Liz?” Alex asked studying her face.

She snapped out of her thoughts. She wasn’t going to let it get to her anymore. “So this therapy, it’s been proven to work?” She asked.

“Well yes, of course it has.” She looked at him doubtfully. “Ok it hasn’t but I was hoping you’d be my testee, so just say it,” he said.

“Testee?” She said with a grin.

“Just say it!” Alex complained.

“Okay,” Liz said. She sucked in a deep breath and pictured Max’s face in her head. She had expected to flinch at the thought of him but she didn’t. Instead she thought of his apology and his child face and his look of innocence and for some strange reason it comforted her. She quickly shook the thought away, not believing herself for her rediculous thoughts. “I am recovering,” she said quetly.

Alex smiled. “A little louder Lizzie pooh?”

Liz chuckled. “I AM RECOVERING!” She yelled.

Alex looked into her eyes as tears filled them. With a happy smile and happy tears she leaned into his shoulder and started to cry. “I am recovering,” she whispered.

Alex kissed the top of her head and smiled with some tears of his own. “You are recovering,” he said personally thanking the stars above.



Liz still hadn’t lost the comfort of her little purple stress ball. She sat on the floor leaning against the end of her bed with her feet out in front of her and her head back. She threw the ball at the wall again and it bounced the wrong way and rolled away out of her reach. She couldn’t be bothered going and getting it so she stood up and climbed into bed.

It was around four in the morning and she had been sitting in the dark for atleast an hour so she was very tired. As hard as she tried she couldn’t sleep, and she tried, boy did she try. All night she would stare at the ceiling, or the wall to her left, or her room to the right, but she just couldn’t drift off no matter what she did.

It was her thoughts that were the problem, it was like her mind was a tap and it just wouldn’t turn off. She couldn’t turn her thoughts, her memories, off. Going and seeing Max had turned the tap on more, causing a heavier flow of suspicions and questions. She had hoped it would end.

There was this feeling, in the pit of her stomach, which had come when she saw him, and hadn’t gone away when she left. She knew he was guilty of what he did, but she just couldn’t seem to conjure up any hate towards the man she had sat infront of. She had plenty of hate towards the man who had pulled her into his car but it didn’t match the way she felt towards Max. It made no sense to her, so she tried to dismiss it from her thoughts. Though, she could not dismiss Max from her thoughts.

She couldn’t believe it, but part of her wanted to go and see him again. She scowled at herself for even thinking such a thing but she couldn’t deny that the thought was there. She thought about his sister and what she had said to the guard. Was his father really a lawyer? That meant that he would have come from a wealthy background or atleast a decent family.

She wondered what had made him turn rebellious at a young age. She guessed he was nineteen or twenty, twenty-four at the most. She heard the sister say that their father was the best lawyer in Boston, was that where he was from?

She sighed. Why did she care? She could tell herself she didn’t but the truth was, she wondered about these things. She didn’t want to; it disgusted her that she was so interested in the man that had stolen from her.

“Why can’t I just stop thinking?” She exclaimed to herself. She rolled over and buried her face in her pillow with a sigh. MUSIC, she thought suddenly, that is my last resort. She switched on her bedside lamp and reached into her draw for some headphones. If she blasted her music at this time of the morning her parent’s would kill her, whether they felt sorry for her, or not.

She grabbed her portable CD player and checked to see what CD was already in it. The cramberries. She could deal with that. She put the head phones on and pressed play, and then switched off her bedside lamp. When she lied down she turned the music up as loud as it could go and clenched her eyes shut. Atleast it worked, all she could think about was how much it hurt her eardrums.

Max still lingered in the back of her mind and getting fed up with it, she vowed to herself that tomorrow she would go to the police station and ask about him. Just where he had been caught, and why they were certain it was him.

Finally she drifted off half an hour later, when her mind and body just couldn’t take it anymore. She woke up around two in the afternoon and felt a little bit refreshed. She hadn’t had any dreams for the first time since it happened, she thanked God for the mercy.

She had a shower and got dressed then rang Maria and asked her to come to the police station with her. She gladly agreed and they went at three-thirty in Liz’s car.

“So why are we here?” Maria asked as they walked in.

“I just…” Liz bit her lip. “You have to promise you won’t think anything bad about it, it’s just something I have to do.”

“Of course Liz, anything you want, I want too.” Maria smiled reassuringly.

“I’m here to ask about Max,” Liz said. “I just, I don’t know why… I just want to know more about him.”

Confusion past over Maria’s face but she quickly forced it away. “Liz that’s totally understandable, if it’ll make you feel better, it’s good!”

A police officer asked them if they needed any help but before Liz could reply Sergeant Yield walked up and cut in. “Ah,” he said. “Miss Parker isn’t it?”

“Yes,” Liz replied. “And this is my friend Maria.”

He smiled. “Nice to meet you Maria,” he said then turned back to Liz. “So Liz what can I do for you?”

“I was just wondering,” she said quietly. “If I could have a few minutes of your time to ask you some questions about… Max Evans’.”

Sympathy flashed in his eyes but he quickly replaced the look with a smile. “Sure, come into my office,” he said while motioning the way.



Max was once told that if you stare at something for long enough you start to notice new things about it. All the insignificant qualtities become more obvious, Max now knew that that only happened when you were extremely bored.

He had been staring at the ceiling for almost two hours now and the knowledge he had gained from it would do nothing to benefit him. The very old concrete had old water patches on it and mold growing in several places. The walls were at least painted a dark yellow cream color that reminded Max of the color of pus.

There was a basin directly to his left attached to the wall, and a toilet beside it. A desk was next to his bed; it was brown, had one draw and a metal chair situated under it. There was one window above the desk that looked out at the courtyard where they had their daily exercise. That time of the day was Max’s saving grace, when he could breathe fresh air into his lungs. It wasn’t long enough for him to get the exercise he was used to, so he was in his cell he passed the time by doing press ups and sit ups and pull ups—anything that he could do in a confined place.

He missed home. His dorm room in Boston University may not have been much but at least he had a television and a comfortable bed that didn’t squeak with every little move he made. He thought about the classes he was missing and how much he’d have to catch up when he got out of here. He had been studying to be a doctor and was pressing himself very hard so he could do it at a young age. All that was a waste of time now because it would take him months, possibly a year, to catch up.

He wished he’d never gone on a break with Michael, his best friend, to Oklahoma City for the weekend. It had now changed his life just because he was in the wrong place at the wrong time. His fists clenched with anger just thinking about it. He recalled the night every day with great annoyance.

”Michael, I’m just going to walk down to the store to get more food!” He had called out as he walked out the hotel room door. He grinned as he walked, happy to finally be away from school and having some fun. Maybe he’d even meet a girl while he was here; he hadn’t been on a date in the longest time.

When he left the hotel, he noted, to his despair, that it was colder out then he had thought. He zipped up his jacket and shoved his hands in his pockets, the store was only one block away anyway, and he could deal with it. In the distance, he could hear police sirens as the cars zoomed down the next street over. He didn’t pay much attention; it wasn’t unusual for the police cars to be chasing someone.

As he rounded the corner, he banged into a man who was sprinting past and didn’t give a damn to watch out for others. The man sped off without looking at Max and under his breath he muttered, “Gee, rude much?”

He noticed the man had dropped something and he picked it up and looked down the street. Even if the guy[/I] had been rude Max wasn’t the type to just let them leave something behind. He ran after the man quickly and followed him down an alley. The police car sirens blasted behind him and quickly Max realized the person they were chasing was obviously the man he was chasing and sped up, even more reason to catch the guy.

He saw the guy jump over a metal fence and as Max neared it a voice behind him yelled, “stop right where you are.”

He had tried to tell the police officers his story but they had no reason to care, or believe what he had to say. All they saw was the bag of money that he had been holding and then pieced together the fact he had been sprinting in the same direction as the real thief. Max didn’t blame them; his story was a little too convenient. He cursed himself for being so stupid.

To make his luck even worse, the guy hadn’t been wanted just for theft, but also two murders and rape. He couldn’t believe it, there was absolutely no way this was happening. While he was still being held in the over night jail cell his parents came to see him and told him they would do everything they could to get him out. After two nights in the same cell, they shipped him to the Albuquerque confinement where his two murders had taken place. His family followed him, and was still here coming to see him almost daily, while working on getting him out. They were staying in a hotel just down the road and put their lives on hold for him.

He felt like shit. This kind of thing did not happen to people like him.

His thoughts were interrupted quickly. “Max Evan’s.” A guard walked up to his cell door and opened it. “You have a visitor,” he said.
















Chapter six

When they left the police station Liz was quiet and Maria didn’t discuss the topic knowing that Liz wasn’t ready to talk about any of what they had heard. She thought she was getting quite good at knowing when not to say anything. She hoped Liz recognized her efforts.

“Liz,” Maria said quietly. “Want to go and get something to eat?”

“No,” Liz answered with a sigh. “I just want to go home and lounge around for what’s left of my weekend.”

“Okay,” Maria backed off.

When Liz pulled up outside Maria’s house Maria hesitated before getting out. She opened the door and was about to step out but turned around and closed the door again.

“Maria?” Liz asked. “What are you doing?”

Maria opened her mouth to say something but then closed it again.

“Maria?”

She sighed. “Liz…” she started. “Why don’t you feel that you can talk to me?”

Liz’s face fell. “Maria…I…” She bit her lip. “Is that how you feel?”

“Well you always seem to open up to Alex and—“

“Maria you are my best, best friend and I love you. I’m sorry for making you feel that way. It’s just so hard to talk about it all; you mean so much to me… I think I just don’t want to have you judge me.”

“Judge you? Liz for heaven sake, this isn’t your fault. You were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Why would I think anything but love and sympathy for you?”

Liz sniffled. “I don’t want you to think I’m a whimp.”

“You are not a whimp,” Maria said. “You are taking this so much better then I would have if I were you. Do you not remember you went and saw him? How brave is that?”

Liz smiled modestly to herself.

“You have to talk to us. Do you know this is just as hard for us as it is for you?”

Liz looked at her in disbelief. “It is not,” she argued. Suddenly, before she realized it, she was very mad at Maria for saying such a thing. “How can you say that?” She asked.

Maria frowned. “It is as hard for us! We love you and seeing you so-so withdrawn hurts us.”

Liz gritted her teeth. “It is NOT!” she exclaimed suddenly. “You can’t say that it’s as hard because you are still whole! You haven’t had a part of yourself stolen! This did not happen to you, it happened to me I will be stuck with this for the REST of my life, you will not. Don’t you dare say this is as hard for you as it is for me.”

“Okay Liz calm down,” Maria said. She slowly registered to what Liz had said. “You don’t feel whole, sweetie?”

“No,” Liz said. “I don’t want to talk about this. I don’t want to talk about it EVER. Please, you better leave.”

Maria had never seen Liz this way before, not it all her years of knowing her. She was always so cool and collected, never terrified and angry… never so broken. “Okay Liz, I’ll ring you tonight?”

Liz didn’t reply she just stared out the window at nothing in particular.

Maria got out of the car and said a quiet goodbye before closing the door. When Liz drove away, she didn’t go home. She didn’t know where she was going, all she wanted was to just disappear for a while. So she drove, she drove for twenty minutes; not registering at all that she was heading in the direction that should have been the last place she wanted to go.

She felt tears in her eyes and wiped them away. She was very disappointed with herself for acting so rudely towards Maria; she had never done that before. She didn’t understand why she did it but to hear someone say he or she was going through what she was going through didn’t seem right. Her sleepless nights and shuddering loneliness seemed wasted.

How Liz ended up standing outside the confinement, she didn’t know. It was three in the afternoon on her Sunday and she should be out shopping or eating or having fun, Right? She asked herself the same question she had been repeating in her mind hundreds of times already this afternoon.

What the hell are you doing?

She thought about what the Police Sergeant had said to her. The evidence they had was very convincing so they were 100% certain it was Max. Liz sighed and nibbled on her nails at the thought. It just didn't seem right, how could someone like him do such a thing?

Someone with such flawless features and the most beautiful most soulful eyes—Where had that thought come from she wondered? The fact that Max was so handsome made the fact he was guilty seem more ridiculous. Why would someone who could clearly get any girl he wanted rape her?

Maybe he had a mental problem, so technically it wouldn’t be his fault.

It confused her to think she was defending him but she couldn’t ignore that everything in her fiber screamed that they had the wrong guy. The consequence of the mistake screamed louder though, the fear that he was still out there over powered everything else demanding it had to be him! It just had to be!

Maybe if she went to see him again she could prove to herself that she got him wrong and he really was a horrible man. Maybe that’s why she was here, to correct her first impression.

Slowly she walked inside and asked the guard to fetch Mr. Evans’. When he left she took a seat on the uncomfortable chair and waited with a rapidly beating heart. Max came out and she was surprised to find herself greeting him with a voice that suggested she had known him for years.

"Hey."

Liz could tell Max was trying to hide the shock that passed over his face when he saw her. He sat down across from her and stared at her through the glass, the lines under his eyes were dark and thick—much like hers— the look he had given her during his last visit was in his eyes again. It resembled sympathy but was different... warmer.

"Hello," he responded quietly. What were you supposed to say to your supposed victim, he wondered? "How are you?" He asked. He knew straight away how strange it sounded for him to ask that, what was she thinking?

She sucked in a breath. "I'm doing better," she replied honestly. What had gotten into her? Her mind screamed. “And you?” Came out of her mouth before she could think… Why was she being so damn friendly?

He looked at her blankly. “As well as could be expected,” he replied.

For those two minutes when they exchanged pleasantries, it was like he was just a normal guy, she was just a normal girl, and there wasn’t the past stacked between them.

Max had been thinking about her. He could admit that to himself. Stella Carmichael, Brenda Tracy, and Liz Parker, how could he forget any of those names? His supposed ‘victims’. He had learnt of them in his first night in jail. Only one of them survived to hate him, Liz Parker. However, here she was, looking breathtaking and inviting.
They had a short silence before Liz spoke again. “When I was here last… the blonde girl talking to the guard said some things about her brother. Is she your sister?”

Max nodded. “Yes,” he replied. “She comes and sees me everyday.”

“She must love you very much,” Liz said quietly.

“She does. She is taking this very hard, as are my parents.”

Liz nibbled on her bottom lip nervously and blushed when he caught her eye. She couldn’t believe the way she was acting; it was weird and uncalled for. She shouldn’t even be here again but here she was—maybe she could blame it on her character?

Before she knew it, she was asking about his life again. “I’m my parent’s only child; I wish I had a brother or sister. What’s your sister’s name?”

Max was puzzled by her behavior. Last time she had been to see him; she was so terrified she couldn’t even sit still for five minutes. This time five minutes had passed and here she still was, the only signs of her discomfort were occasionally biting her lip, which Max found very cute, and the crossing and uncrossing of her legs. It was as if the Gods were looking out for him. For her to be comfortable enough to talk to him was a miracle—and he would not take it for granted.

He smiled and she seemed to physically relax. “Her name is Isabel and as much as I love her she can sometimes drive me insane. You should cherish not having to share your parent’s attention.”

Liz licked her lips. “I-I don’t know. Attention is good but you can’t talk to your parent’s about everything.”

“Well maybe you should treat your best friend as family,” Max said quietly. “Michael—“

“Michael?” Liz asked.

“My best friend. He thinks of my sister and I as his family.” Max watched her tuck her hair behind her ears and glance at the door. She was uncomfortable being so friendly with him, he could tell, and he understood why. He silently decided he would try to make her feel as welcomed as possible, who said he had to act like her attacker? He wasn’t, so he could be himself.

“My best friends are Maria and Alex,” Liz said slowly, avoiding his eyes. “We’ve been friends since we were born; our parents are good friends too.”

Max sat forward in his chair and rested his head on his hand. “Sounds like you have a nice life,” he said. “Are you in college… or high school?”

“I’m in my last year of high school,” Liz replied. Was he much older then her? Please say you aren’t! Liz almost wanted to say. She wanted to throttle herself for thinking such a thing but the more he spoke the more at ease she felt with him. There just wasn’t any reason to be afraid of him other then what everyone ‘said’ he did. It just didn’t seem right…

“Do you… are you in high school?” She asked. He didn’t look much older then her, maybe nineteen or twenty?

“No,” he replied. “I go to Boston University, I’m in my second year.”

Liz frowned. Then what had he been doing in Oklahoma? What had he been doing here on October the 9th, the date of her attack?

“What are you studying?” She asked.

“Medicine,” Max replied. “I want to be a children’s doctor.”

Liz crossed her arms over herself and sighed. He just had to be wonderful didn’t he? Why did he have to be the perfect guy that under any other circumstances she would have fallen in love with? No! He wasn’t perfect; he was a disgusting filthy man that violated innocent girls.

She lifted her gaze and finally looked him right in the face. They didn’t speak for several minutes while she searched his soul with her eyes. No, no matter how much she said it he just didn’t fit her personal description of her attacker.

“Do you know what you want to do?” He asked softly. His eyes were warm, loving, he was genuinely interested in her reply, and he wasn’t just making conversation.

“Yes,” Liz replied, bravely keeping his gaze. “I want to be a molecular biologist.”

“Really?” Max asked, his lips peaking up. “You seem like the teachers pet type, I’m sure you’ll get there.”

Liz’s eyes danced, she tried not to smile. “I don’t know whether to be insulted or complimented,” she said.

“Complimented,” Max said. “Because admittedly I am an excellent student too.”

“Is that right?” Liz asked. “What a geek.”

“Yes,” Max said. “Aren’t you just?”

Liz snorted. “Oh my goodness you did not just do that! I haven’t heard someone pull that off since I was in the third grade!”

“What can I say?” Max said, chuckling.

Liz shook her head. After shooting him her attempted ‘evil glare’ she said, “okay so maybe you are right… but who said it was a bad thing?”

“No one,” Max replied. “So what University are you going to?”

“I’m actually going to Boston University too,” she admitted. “I got accepted four months ago, I chose it for a school because a lot of my father’s family live in the city and will take me in.”

“There are some awesome science teachers there, you’ll like it. I recommend Professor Rick Heart, he’s really friendly and if you make friends with him you’ll do well.”

Liz smiled. “Are you in any of his classes?”

“As a matter of a fact, I am,” he replied.

The unspoken remained between them. Would he ever get to be children’s doctor? Will this on his record it was very unlikely, he would be lucky if he wasn’t sentenced to a life in jail. Liz noticed he still talked as if he was going back. Still holding onto hope that they would prove the crimes weren’t committed by him. She felt an overflowing tidal wave of sympathy for him.

“So,” Liz said. “Is Isabel your only sister? Do you have any real brothers?”

“No,” Max replied. “It’s just me and Is.”

Liz nodded. She glanced at the door but couldn’t help looking back at Max in front of her. It was hard to tear her eyes away. What are in those eyes of yours? She wanted to ask. Why are you watching me that way?

Max was besotted with her all ready. How could he not be? She was beautiful; she held a glow about her that drew you in. It was completely inappropriate for him to have feelings for this girl, they couldn’t be in a more complicated situation, but he couldn’t stop. He wanted to touch her hair; he wanted her to be his.

“Does she go to Boston University with you?” She asked. He didn’t know what to stare at while she spoke her beautiful, life-filled shinning eyes or her full pink lips that breathed life into her lungs. He sure as hell couldn’t look away. He almost opened his mouth and said please don’t leave.

She stared into his eyes while she waited for him to reply. He felt naked, could she see every little detail of his being?

He finally found his voice. “She is a year older then me. But yes, she goes to the same school. She wanted to be a fashion designer.”

“She looked like a model,” Liz said. She wondered what the parent’s looked like, were they as gorgeous as their children were?

Max smiled. “She has done some modeling,” he said. “But she told me her passion was in making clothes not wearing them.”

Liz nodded. “Have you always lived in Boston?” She asked.

“Yes,” Max replied. “Have you always lived in Albuquerque?”

“I don’t live here,” Liz explained. “I live in Roswell.”

“The alien capital!” Max teased. “Do you work at any of the alien tourist stores?”

Liz blushed. “Unfortunately, yes,” she admitted. “I work at a local diner called the crash down. I have to wear this green and silver dress with little alien antennas.”

Max laughed.

“Shh,” Liz hissed. “It’s not funny!”

He continued to laugh. It was wonderful to hear and a beautiful sight. He had perfect white teeth and his eyes just came to life.

Liz tried to fight a chuckle but couldn’t. She giggled with him but slowly realized what she was doing and shot up from her seat.

Max saw it too, she seemed to just shut down. She realized she was laughing with her attacker and that scared her, she seemed to start shaking with fear.

“I-I have to go,” she stuttered. She turned and started to head in the direction of the door but Max stopped her.

“Liz,” he said. He couldn’t believe he was going to ask this, “Will you come back some time?”

She couldn’t catch his eyes. She stared down at her shoes and muttered, “Maybe.”

Chapter Seven

Why did crying and letting out her pain seem to promise relief? It called to Liz, saying come, let it out and you'll feel better. She almost just wanted to break down, scream, and holler until all her worries were gone.

She sat in her room, more agitated then she used to be because of her daunting thoughts. Now it was for a different reason. It wasn't fear that she felt; it was something else that she could not explain because she had never felt it before.

October the 9th still plagued her. Of course it did. It would for the rest of her life. But now another burden was it even a burden? Continued to make the load she carried on her shoulders heavier. She was only a small girl; her shoulders were not broad like a well-built man. Therefor she could not take too many burdens.

No, she realized. This was not a burden resting on her shoulders. This was a burden resting on her heart.

Today was December the 17. It was a very cold day; the snow and chilly breeze stalked every citizen that was brave enough to confront it outside.

Liz Parker sat by the fire in her empty home with a mug of chamomile tea resting in-between her two cold hands. She was wearing her scarf and jacket, her hair was done up nicely, she was wearing her make up… her shoes were on her feet. She would not leave. It was inappropriate, it most definitely was. She knew this, because if someone asked where she was going, she would not tell him or her the truth. She would have to lie.

It's not as if she was breaking any laws, she told herself. She was only concerned for the person who sat alone doing nothing all day probably in a freezing cold cell…

She shouldn't care, she told herself. She told herself, but she did not convince herself.

Her heart continued to send out a signal, calling, begging her to go to the one place she so desperately wanted to be. She was so torn, between what was supposed to be right and what was supposed to be wrong.

Some days when she drove there and sat across from him, watching his face as he spoke her eyes would open wide and her heart would open wide. She would study his every move with complete awe and not be able to tear her eyes away. The way his lips moved up and down as he spoke the words of wisdom he had learnt through his twenty-one years of living. The way his eyes glowed when he spoke of his sister, his best friend, the people he loved.

The way he smiled when he was brought into the room and saw that it was she waiting for him.

She would clench her hands, clench her toes, clench her mind, and most of all clench her heart and then smile back. Knowing it was wrong, knowing what she was doing would most definitely be frowned upon… she just could not stop herself.

Then they would talk. They would talk as if they were old best friends that had not seen each other for years and had so much to catch up on. They would talk and talk, to no end about anything and everything. Anything and everything-things that mattered, things that were trivial but did matter because it brought them that little bit closer to discovering each others character completely.

She wanted to go to him. She did, she could lie to everyone else but she could not lie to herself. At first, she wanted to see him only sparingly, once a week maybe and then three times a week, then every afternoon and now all day everyday. She couldn't go when she wanted to, people would get suspicious as to her whereabouts but it didn't hide that fact the longing was there.

His hands, she told herself. His hands were not those of the man in her flashes of remembrance. She may not have seen her attackers face but she had smelt him, she had caught glimpses of the bony fingers tearing at her shorts. The man she ached to go see did not have bony fingers. She saw his hands frequently and his hands were masculine, nice, well looked after, strong and the type that Liz liked. Even his hands gave the aura of decency, innocence, and foremost care. They spoke in which a way that dared her to believe not one of the well-sculptured fingers had been laid upon a person in a harmful way.

She tried to fight it. She tried to tell herself how absurd she was being infatuated with her attacker. For how could anyone fall in love with a murderer, their murderer?

Liz did feel dead. Dead in an emotional and innocent way-Her friends saw it. Her Maria knew she was hiding something but never pressed her harder then she knew was called for. Alex cared too much for Liz to put her through stress so he pretended that everything was normal.

Everything was far from normal.

It would never go back to the way it had been at the beginning of October when she was still young and carefree. She knew why too, it was because back when the trees were orange and autumn was just nearing its final chapter for the year…she had been a child. Back in the delicious days of youth when you could run down the road in your togs not caring about the stares you gathered or of the extra freckles, you would possess the next day.

As much as she missed it, she didn't think she could go back. Not now, not when there were so many emotions she was yet to experience. Love. She thrived on the thought of discovery. It terrified her in a way that enticed her. Why did its aching and calling have to be so persistent?

She would ask herself these questions repeatedly but she could not find the answers. For the half an hour when she prepared to leave, she would tell herself she could not go. Then she would lecture herself while she walked to her car and then back inside, and then back to her car. On the way there, she would get so frustrated, she frequently had tears in her eyes. She could tell herself and tell herself not to go but somehow she always ended up there, always sitting in front of him.

He made her feel better when she saw him. Watching him and feeling his presence seemed to calm her at the same time it caused butterflies to flutter in her stomach. He knew it was difficult for her but he was always so kind and friendly to try to make her feel more welcome. Their conversations always stayed far away from the attack. Liz wondered maybe if they pretended it didn’t happen it would just go away.

As she knew she would, she eventually got up off the couch and headed towards her car. She drove in silence to Albuquerque, here mind going into over drive.

The guard knew her by now and she didn’t even need to tell him who to go fetch. He smiled at her and she smiled back, went, and took her seat. She always seemed to sit in the last booth, almost as if it would offer she and Max more privacy.

When he came out his face brightened and he smiled with all his teeth.

“Hi Liz,” he said.

“Hi,” she replied. “Max.”

He took a seat and studied her face. She studied his too. “No offense,” she spoke quietly. “But you seem to look more tired every time I see you.”

“I do?” He asked. “I can’t sleep very well on the bed in my cell. You look tired too.”

Although you look tired, you are more stunning every time I see you, they both thought. Liz bit her lip and tucked her hair behind her ears.

“How’s Isabel?” She asked.

“She’s going back to Boston in two days,” Max said sadly. “She can’t miss anymore school, she wishes she could stay…”

“Your parent’s are staying?” She asked.

“Yes.” He scratched behind his ear. “I will miss her visits but I know she has a life to get back to.”

He noticed her face constrict and decided to change the topic. “Anyway enough about me, how are you? You look…”

“Tired?” She reminded him.

“No,” he breathed. “Good, you look really good. How’s school treating you?”

Liz tired to ignore his first comment and the urge to say the same about him. “It’s good, graduation tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow!” Max said genuinely happy for her. “Good luck. You said you wanted to be at the top of your class have you succeeded?”

Liz blushed and modestly nodded.

“I knew you would,” Max said.

“Proud?” She grinned. “Elizabeth Parker class valedictorian.”

“Ecstatic,” he teased. “Are your parent’s going to be there? Maria, Alex?”

“Yes,” she said. “Yes and Yes.”

Max smiled. “I remember my graduation. I don’t know why but I was actually kind of nervous, are you?”

“Just about giving a speech. I never was too keen on public speaking,” Liz explained. “I spoke at my grandmothers funeral… ever since then I dread doing it.”

“I’m sorry,” he said.

“About what?”

“Your grandmother,” he said. “You must have loved her very much.”

Liz felt the familiar sting of tears whenever she thought about her favorite person in the whole world. “I did,” she said. “I do,” she corrected herself.

“I barely see my grandparents, they live in France.”

“France!” Liz said gleefully. “Oh you are so lucky. I think you are just saying that because you know how much I love Europe.”

“No, honestly I wouldn’t do that. They have lived there since I was seven years old. How is your French going?”

“Tres bien, merci,” she replied with a grin.

Max laughed. “That’s good. You would like where they live it is so beautiful,” he said. She smiled. “I’ve only ever been there twice.”

“Twice more then I have,” she reminded him. “I plan to go there as soon as I can. I can’t help but think I was meant to be born there.”

“Maybe in a past life?” Max asked.

Liz giggled. “Maybe.” She was used to laughing with him now. She lived for the laughing. He was so charming and funny, if she ran away every time he made her laugh she would be there for no more then two minutes.

“Max.”

A males voice behind Liz made her turn and look up.

“Michael! Oh my God,” Max said.

Michael glanced at Max and then at Liz and then back and Max. “Is this a bad time?” He asked.

“No, no I was just leaving,” Liz said standing up quickly.

“Liz you don’t have to leave,” Max said. “Stay.”

He couldn’t tell her that he waited all day every day for her to come visit him. Whenever he got told he had a visitor he would hope it was her.

“No I really should go,” Liz said. “I’ll see you later.”

She left before he could do anything to stop her. Michael looked at Max with surprise, “who was that?” He asked.

[nicola]

Chapter Eight

“Footballs my favorite sport, even though I’m not particularly good at it,” Liz explained. “There’s just something about it… being out there with the wind blowing against your face. It’s like the whole world has just disappeared and you and the oppositions all that’s left.” Liz laughed. “You probably think I sound crazy but its how I feel, strange may it be.”

Max’s face was blank. How did he find a way to hide to how he felt for this girl to the whole world who would not let him be with her? He sucked in a deep breath and ran his hand through his hair.

“What?” Liz asked her lips perking into a smile. “Am I… boring you? Do you want me to leave?”

“No!” Max exclaimed. He blushed at himself and then grinned at her. “No, I mean you aren’t boring me. I’ve been playing football since I was six, I know exactly what you are talking about.”

“You have?” She asked her eyes twinkling. She nearly opened her mouth ad said, someday we’ll have to play together. Then she realized that day would never come. Would he ever get out of here? Did she want him too? She shouldn’t. Nevertheless, she did.

“Put your hand up to the glass,” Max said softly. “I want to see something.”

Liz pressed her hand up to the glass and watched as he put his hand up on top of hers.

“Look,” she said quietly. “My fingers barely come up to the middle of yours.”

He was staring into her eyes with an expression Liz did not understand. It was so…full of emotion. She tried to convince herself that she didn’t know what the emotion was but deep down she knew. She knew because she felt it too. She wondered if her eyes reflected his.

“Hmm,” he mumbled. “You really are so tiny,” his voice cracked.

She blushed but couldn’t bring herself to look away. “It’s so annoying. I’m the shortest person I know. I wish I could grow.”

“Please don’t,” he argued. “You’re perfect the way you are.”

Liz’s heart missed at beat. The words, ‘so are you’ sat on the end of her tongue but she quickly swallowed them away. Along with, ‘why did you have to be so wonderful? Why are you everything I ever wanted to find in my life?’ Dejectedly she pulled her hand away from the glass and slumped back into her chair. It squeaked slightly. “Thank you,” she mumbled.

“Liz,” Max said, his eyes boring into hers. “Do you have a boyfriend back in Roswell?”

She bit her lip and shook her head no. She was so shy, she wished she didn’t turn red so often. She noticed Max smiled slightly and opened his mouth to say something. She looked down at her watch to avoid his piercing stare. Cutting him off, she suddenly sprung up from her chair in shock. “Oh my goodness!” she cried. “It’s five-thirty! My parent’s are going to kill me; I’m going to be late for my graduation dinner party. What happens to time when I’m with you? I have to go, I’m sorry. See you later?”

“Oh,” Max said sadly. Damn! Don’t go! He wanted to say. “Yeah I’ll see you later.” He watched her hurry away and then rested his head against the glass and sighed. Why did he always feel so empty when she left?

A few minutes later the guard broke his thoughts. “Come on Max, time to go for dinner.” The guard touched his shoulder and he got up slowly. In a perfect world where he had met her on normal circumstances, he would have been going to her graduation dinner with her. In this world however, he would have to eat at a table with seventy other men while they ate what was supposed to be grilled cheese.

“You’ve been very lucky to be allowed to stay in here talking to your lady friend for so long, you know. You usually aren’t allowed this many visitors—it’s only because you haven’t give us any trouble.”

Lucky? Max did not consider himself lucky. “Thank you,” he muttered. He thought about the sad, lonely Christmas he was going to have in here. He should have had his trial by now but the judge assigned to his case had been in a car accident and the rest of the local judges had already left for their holidays. Well, he thought trying to be positive, at least that brought his parent’s some time to help his defense.

Yesterday Michael had started bombarding him with questions about Liz as soon as she left. As soon as Max admitted that she was his only surviving ‘victim,’ he had gone ballistic.

“What do you mean she’s one of your supposed ‘victims’?” He had exclaimed. “Then what the hell is she doing talking to you as if you’re her best friend.”

“I don’t know… wait yes I do… no, I don’t… you wouldn’t understand Michael.”

“What’s there to understand? She thinks you attacked her doesn’t she?”

“Yes but its not that way between us. I guess maybe she suspects it isn’t me, that’s why she keeps coming back—you wouldn’t understand Michael.”

“You said that all ready. So, if she keeps coming back and thinks you’re innocent why hasn’t she gone to the police to get you out? You have asked her to haven’t you?”

“No Michael I haven’t. It hadn’t crossed my mind too. Look she’s going through a hard time right now and then to discover that I’m not the man she expected—she is probably very confused. Just leave her alone, if she knows I didn’t do it and she feels okay with it, then maybe she’ll go and get me out but I will not ask her. If I asked her don’t you think she’d find that rather concerning?”

Michael didn’t seem to, or want to understand and so they dropped the topic. The problem was now Max was stuck with the thoughts that maybe Liz could get him out? If she told someone he didn’t do it they would let him out—it was that simple. The temptation of getting out of this vulgar place was very strong but he really couldn’t bring up something like that. It would probably scare her off.

He really didn’t want her to stop coming to see him. It kept him going while he was locked in here.



When Liz reached Roswell she had to zoom home and get changed into her evening dress and then head to the restaurant. She was already late and it would take her at least twenty minutes to do her hair.

When she finally pulled up in the car park at the restaurant—forty minutes late—she ran inside quickly.

“Parker,” she said to the man at the counter.

“Ah yes,” he replied. “The rest of the party has already arrived, this was Miss.”

She followed him to the table and when her parent’s saw her, they looked worried. Maria and Alex just looked relieved.

“Liz,” he mother said. “Where on earth have you been?”

“I am so sorry,” Liz apologized profusely. “I lost track of time.”

“You can say that again,” her father spat. “You aren’t going to start making me regret buying you a car are you?”

“No dad, it won’t happen again, I’m sorry.”

Maria looked at Liz suspiciously. “Where were you?” She asked.

“No where,” Liz replied. This was when the lying starts, she thought. Would they understand if she told them the truth? She had a sneaking suspicion they wouldn’t.

“I need to go to the ladies room,” Maria said standing up. “Liz?”

Liz sighed and got up.

“We ordered ten minutes ago Liz. We ordered you the chicken. Don’t be too long,” Nancy said.

Maria practically dragged Liz to the bathroom. The questions started instantly. “Where have you been Liz? Don’t give me that bullshit answer either. You’ve been running off to some place a lot lately and I demand to know where.”

“I thought you needed to go toilet?”

“Oh Liz stop playing innocent. Does this have something to do with me because I am really afraid you are just blocking me out because you hate me now or something. I know not to talk about it but you have changed and you don’t seem to want me around anymore—“

“Maria!” Liz cried. “How can you think that? Of course, I want you around; you are my best friend. I need you around the most!”

“Then why are you avoiding me? You don’t know what it’s like for me to think you hate me. Ever since—“ She hesitated.

“Ever since when?” Liz asked.

“That time when you yelled at me in your car, you disappear a lot more often.”

Liz sighed. “I don’t…disappear,” she said.

“Then where do you go?”

“I-I…” Liz didn’t know what else to say but the truth. “I go to Albuquerque.”

“Albuquerque? Why do you go there?” Maria asked.

“I-I-I you know I just…”

“You just what?”

“I go to the confinement. I go and see Max okay? There now you know, I go to the prison and I see the man that raped me, I go and see him every free moment I get.” Tears filled her eyes and she started to sob. “I wish I could stay away, I try, I really do but I just can’t… you have no idea what it’s like Maria. Max he is just so… he’s so sweet and I just can’t see how he could do something like that. Everything inside me is just screaming that they got the wrong guy but fear also keeps me from admitting it wasn’t him and I’m so confused, I AM so confused MARIA!”

Maria looked at her with a blank face. “Are you meaning to tell me you are in love with your attacker?”

Liz gulped. “No! No I don’t love him, I no—that just sounds so wrong!” You do love him, she told herself. You know you do.

“But you think he’s innocent?” Maria asked.

“No… I mean I don’t know! I told you I don’t know the answers. All I know is that I can’t stay away and I need to go see him. He makes me feel happy Maria, he does. I can’t believe I’m admitting it but he does no matter how wrong and sick and twisted it is.”

Maria didn’t know what to say. She thought it was crazy, of course, she did. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “Liz you have to go speak to a councilor again, you have to talk to someone who knows what they are talking about.”

“No,” Liz said. “Maria I want you to tell me what I should do. Tell me your opinion.”

Maria sucked in a deep breath. “I think that you are just going to see him because you have convinced yourself that like him so you will feel better about what happened. Liz honey—I think you should just stay away from there.”

Liz looked at the floor dejectedly. “I wish it were that easy,” she said.



It was Christmas day and Liz had never felt lonelier in her life. She lay in her bed clutching the blankets to her chest and crying into her pillow. She hadn’t seen Max since before her graduation dinner and she ached to go see him. She would picture him sitting alone in his cell with no one talk to and she wanted to go to him and keep him company.

Then she would scold herself for being so ridiculous and tried to make herself hate him. It just didn’t seem possible. She couldn’t hate him.

She cried some more. It felt so pathetic but she decided she was pathetic. She could have fallen in love with anyone but she didn’t, she fell in love with the one person she shouldn’t and couldn’t love.

She cursed the person who had done this to her. She didn’t quite know who that was but how could they let this happen? How could they let her fall in love with someone so far out of her reach? It got her so worked up she ended up throwing things in anger.

None of this was fair and the only thing that would make her feel better was seeing him. She wanted to talk to him; it was only thing that succeeded in making her feel whole again. Maria had tried to be supportive and had promised she wouldn’t tell Liz’s parents’ but she told Alex. He was just as confused by the whole thing and agreed that she should stay away.

Liz didn’t want to stay away and nothing anyone said to her would help. Not caring anymore, she got up and shrugged on her clothes before hurrying out to her car. Max needed her company and she needed his, as strange as it was. Everyone else be damned.

Chapter Nine

Liz walked into the confinement with a range of feelings washing over her. Guilt because she was going against Maria and Alex’s wishes. Confusion because it was now so obvious to her that she needed Max. Relief because she was finally going to see him again. Anger at whomever had dealt her this twisted hand in fate.

She walked up to the officer and asked him to fetch Max Evans’ for her. She was surprised when he led her into a room she had never been in before. She didn’t have time to react or tell him no. The room was like a communal dinning room with tables and chairs everywhere. When she looked around she saw Max hugging two people she guessed were his parents. There were three other men talking to their guests but she wasn’t paying attention to them and the stares they gave her.

Max’s parents’ were just saying goodbye to him and when they walked past her, she glanced at them and smiled unsure. They smiled back through their tears and she gulped back the lump that gathered in her throat.

When she turned her concentration back to Max she noticed he was watching her with his little shy smile she had gotten to know and love. He motioned her over and she would have moved if her feet weren’t rooted in place. Her heart thundered in her chest and goose bumps pricked her skin. If she went over there, there would be no glass separating them. If he wanted to he could touch her.

Max’s smile faded when he saw her hesitation and he looked at the ground. Her heart suddenly dropped and she found the courage to walk over. The last thing she wanted was to make him feel bad. She would never inflict pain on him. When she neared him she realized that she wasn’t afraid of him touching her, she was afraid that she would want to touch him.

She stopped directly in front of him and spoke in a voice filled with forced enthusiasm. “Merry Christmas!”

He looked down at her with confusion. “Yes, Merry Christmas to you too. I am surprised you came today, I thought you’d be at home with your parent’s opening presents.”

“I will be, later… I just, I mean they sleep late on their days off so they won’t be up for a while anyway.” She couldn’t take her eyes off him. It was so good to see him again, she wanted to apologize for not coming lately, and she wanted to say she had missed him. What she wanted, was to tell him everything. Instead, she said, “How have you been?”

“I’ve been okay, you?” He wanted to brush her hair behind her ear so much. He had to sit down before he lost his control. He motioned her to sit and pulled the chair out for her. She shifted her feet uncomfortably.

“I just… I’ll sit…” She moved away from the chair he had pulled out and sat on the one at the other end of the small table so she wouldn’t be next to him. “Here,” she finished.

Max sighed and sat down across from her. He had to keep reminding himself of how hard this probably was for her. He wanted so much to tell her that he had never hurt her nor he ever would. “You haven’t been by in a while,” he mentioned. To be exact she hadn’t been by in eight days he had counted.

Liz just nodded. What could she say? That her friends demanded she didn’t come back because he was her rapist. She couldn’t tell him the truth. It was for just the same reason they couldn’t talk about her attack.

Because it would be awkward, that’s why.

It was about the only thing they couldn’t talk about. She knew deep down that it being awkward was not the only reason she could not talk about it. She knew it was because she was afraid he would tell her he didn’t do it. Because she knew that if he said it, she would believe him.

She felt as if they were both tiptoeing around a hole on the thin ice. Every so often when something about her attack would slip out of their mouths it would be the ice cracking a little more. Eventually they would fall in.

“So,” Max said changing the topic because it was obvious, she didn’t want to talk about it. “What do you have planned for dinner?” Christmas dinner—how he wished he was at home enjoying it with his family.

“My parents and I are driving to my Aunt and Uncles like we do every year. They are all over forty so I end up sitting in the spare bedroom watching cartoons so I don’t have to endure their clucking about and talking about Aunt Stacy going through menopause.”

Max laughed. “Sounds—er—fun,” he said. She nodded whilst rolling her eyes. “You told me you hate watching cartoons because they are boring. So why do you end up watching them?”

“Uncle John loves them and I don’t have the heart to tell him no when he goes to his collection and pulls out this weeks favorite.” Liz could see he was amused, she loved they warm glow in his eyes.

“Well,” Max said. “If you had a choice what would you do for Christmas?”

“I…” Liz thought about it for a second.

“Let me guess,” he said. “You would eat enchiladas and watch olden day movies?”

Liz laughed. “You know me too well but actually… since I can do that any day I’d love to go camping somewhere. Of course, we would have to stay in a cabin because it’s too cold this time of the year for a tent. It would have to be in a beautiful forest next to a lake that is frozen over. Maybe I could even go ice skating or star gazing…”

“With family and friends there too?” He asked.

Liz wanted to say she used to dream about doing that with her soul mate, her husband. She was too shy though so she just nodded her head and bit her lip. He smiled and said that it sounded nice.

“What about you?” She asked. “What’s your dream Christmas?”

Max was not as shy. “I normally spend it with my family and relatives and we have the fire going and the house is just covered with decorations. My sister is known as the Christmas Nazi so it’s always such a big thing. My mom cooks all day…”

“So you like Christmas just as it is?” Liz asked. His family seemed perfect.

“It’s nice but I guess I would rather spend it with one person, someone I love so we can just stay up all night eating and talking in front of the fire.”

They caught each others eyes and could not look away. To Liz his idea of a great Christmas sounded wonderful, and having no control over her mind a flash of her being there with Max like that came to mind. She gulped and tried to look away and but couldn’t help but feel her heart swell at the way he was looking at her. Was he thinking the same thing?

Without looking away, she commented that it was a nice idea. He bit his lip and nodded then pulled his eyes away from hers. He told her about his childhood and how he was obsessed with Superman. He told her how his mother made him a Superman birthday cake and brought him a Superman lunch box.
“I used to run around the house in a cape, and draw a big S on my shirts. My mom would get so mad when I did that…”

Liz laughed. “I used to collect Polly Pockets,” she admitted. “So don’t be embarrassed.”

Max laughed too. “At home in the attack there is about three boxes full of all my old Superman collectors items. Is that the same with your Polly Pockets?”

Liz blushed and nodded. “Yes, definitely.” She glanced down at her watch and sighed. “I really should get going I only wanted to stop by and see yo—“ She paused, what was she about to say? She couldn’t say that! “Stop by and wish you a Merry Christmas.”

“Yes,” Max said dejectedly. “Thank you for coming. My day is considerably brighter now.”

Liz blushed and got up from her chair. “Around eight tonight you can safely say that I am watching cartoons at that moment and falling asleep with my head on my hand.”

Max pictured her in his mind; she would look so cute like that…

They shared a look and a little smile before she left and when she reached the door she turned around and looked at him sitting at the table by himself. He looked so lost in this big place. She felt tears sting her eyes when she thought about this from an innocent mans point of view, how horrible it would be. She didn’t realize what she was admitting to herself and quickly pushed the thought away.

She caught his eyes once more and lifted her hand to wave. He smiled and waved back and then she left feeling like a cold hand was squeezing her heart.



Liz read the line once more trying to get it to finally register in her mind.

‘He is wearing neatly pressed pants that end just above the heels of his Nike sneakers.’

Again she read it and again she couldn’t care less.

Coming to the public library by herself and reading books down the back away from everyone used to be her favorite thing to do. She could close off and go to any place she wanted without being interrupted but now her thoughts interrupted her so loudly she couldn’t sneak away from the life she was living right now.

Liz sighed and put down the book in surrender.

What a mess her life had become. What a catastrophe—that’s what it felt like to her. She used to enjoy her routine, her lack of adventure, but satisfying life. What was happening to her? Was it a good thing or would it be the end of her before she knew it?

She rested her head in her hands and closed her eyes. Max’s smiling face sprung to mind and she sat up, opened her eyes and cursed herself. She didn’t want to admit it to herself but to hold it in seemed to make them come more frequently. Fantasies.

No, she was not foreign to fantasies but whom she was having them about was definitely new and definitely wrong. In her most recent one, he would be sitting next to her “in the confinement” and they were having their staring contest that they quite frequently had. Suddenly he would spring up from his chair and lift her out of hers. He would sit her on top of the table and step in-between her legs then she would rap her arms around his neck and they would share the most passionate heart soaring kiss that the world had ever seen. Well, her world had ever seen.

Max Evans and her attack were slowing taking over her entire life. The thing was, Max Evans was in a completely different category to her attack. She had nightmares all night long and then she would have fantasies all day long. Max Evans was only present in the fantasies.

She had to end the loophole she was stuck in. She had to stop going to see Max Evans or go to the police and have them let him out.



“You know,” Liz said with her mouth half filled with ice cream. “I don’t know what I believe in. I’m a scientist so I find it hard to really believe anything without proof first.”

Max is sitting at the head of the table today; she is sitting next to him. She brought ice cream. This is what she usually does with Maria—talks and eats ice cream. The guards are only letting them get away with this because it’s his trial tomorrow. She’s trying not to think about it.

“Ah, but most people think that science is a religion,” Max said.

“They are probably right.” Liz smiled. “Do you believe that?”

“I believe what you believe,” he replied chuckling.

“Oh,” Liz said. “Well then, I don’t know what I believe so we are both lost.”

“Or…open minded?”

Liz laughed. “Yes, or open minded.” She watched he dig his spoon into the ice cream pot and then bring it up to his beautiful lips. He licks the spoon all over getting every little bit of mixture off it before going back for more. She sighs and he looks at her and catches her staring.

She doesn’t blush. She’s given up blushing around him; she has no reason to be shy. “You like it?” She asked.

He nodded. “Yes, you brought my favorite—rocky road. Thank you for remembering.”

How could I forget? “I like this flavor too,” she reminded him.

“But not before crème brulee,” Max said. They shared a smile.

When they both went to get a spoonful of ice cream their hands collided and touched. Liz looked up at Max but he was looking at their hands and missed the expression in her eyes. He dropped his spoon and rapped his hand around hers, rubbing her knuckles lovingly with his fingers. Liz’s breath caught in her throat and she too dropped her spoon. Max ran his warm hands over her cold skin and then, being bold, brought her hand up to his lips and kissed her wrist.

Liz’s eyes flashed and she bit her lip. This had to stop right now…

She closed her eyes and when Max looked at her face this is what he saw. Her conflict with herself, her eyes darting back and forth under her eye lids. She was trying to hard to tell herself she didn’t want this but she did, she wanted it as much as him. Max was going to lean forward and kiss her when suddenly she opened her eyes and shifted to the end of her seat so she could get closer to him. She was the one to do it, as surprising as that was; she leaned forward and brushed her lips across his.

She pulled away almost as quickly as she had done it but Max moved his free hand to weave it through her hair. So that’s what it feels like. I knew it would be that silky. He kissed her this time more then the opened-mouthed peck as she had given. He drew his tongue along her bottom lip and finally, hesitantly, she opened up for him.

Chapter Ten

Max pulled away from Liz when he felt drops of warm water on his skin. He opened his eyes and saw that she was crying and he didn’t have to ask why. What was wrong with him? He should not have done that. He wiped away her tears and pressed his forehead against hers. He spoke the words that had been aching to get out since he had first met her. “I didn’t do it Liz, I promise I’d never seen you before the time you came here to see me. I would never hurt you—“

Liz whimpered and turned away so he could not see her eyes. “You are just telling me that because you don’t want to be in here for the rest of your life,” she spoke weakly trying to make herself believe it.

Max noticed this. “Why can’t you look at me and say that?”

Liz groaned loudly. She had no reply. “This isn’t right. You rappe… you attacked me. I HATE you.”

“Do you?” He asked. “Liz you have to believe me. I didn’t—”

“I don’t have to do anything… I can’t, I can’t do this!” She got up from her chair. “HE is not still out there, you did it. You did this to me and I have to go.” She grabbed her jacket off the back of the chair and put it on.

He grabbed her arm before she could get away.

“Let go of me!” She exclaimed.

“Liz, I’m in love with you,” he said.

Liz froze. “What?”

“I. Am. In. love. With. You.” Max let go of her arm. “If you won’t believe that I didn’t attack you then at least believe that and I will some peace of mind.”

Liz didn’t glance at him before she left. She drove home as fast as she could with the music blasted loudly and when she ran into the kitchen at home where her mother was baking she said, “mom, I am not going to the trial tomorrow, I can’t do it.” She burst into tears and her mother ran to her and enveloped her in a hug.

“Please mom, I can’t go…” she cried.

“Okay darling you don’t have to go, you don’t have to go…” Nancy held her tight against her body. She had no idea what had caused this sudden outburst but she hadn’t seen her daughter this upset even when it happened and this was her one chance to be there for her. “Hey, I know, why don’t you go have a nice hot bubble bath with candles and by the time you get out my chocolate cake will be ready and we can have it with some coffee?”

Liz wiped her eyes, looked up at her mother with big adoring, sad, confused eyes, and nodded. “Thank you,” she said.

“Its okay darling, don’t worry about anything. We still have the afternoon, maybe after we’ve had something to eat we can go to the cinema?”

“That would be great,” she said.

“Good, now go and relax. Liz, don’t worry about anything okay? Everything will be fine, you’ll see. I love you.”

Liz shuddered. Max loved her too.

She went and got her bath ready and when she was in the hallway getting a towel out of the linen cupboard, she heard her mother on the telephone.

“I don’t care if she’s the only living victim, she isn’t going. She doesn’t want to and she doesn’t have to. Can’t they just but the prick in jail for life and get it finished? When they ask where she is tell them that she is at home trying to recover, isn’t that enough fucking evidence for them?”

Liz closed her eyes and rested her forehead on the hallway wall.

“I understand why they want her to go up in front of the court but she can’t do it. She’s already told them it was him, what else could she possibly need to say?” There was a long pause. “I’m not promising anything, if in the morning she decides to go then we will be there, but if she still doesn’t want to, then we won’t.”

The telephone clicked as it was put back on the cradle and Liz walked into the bathroom and closed the door. She quickly undressed and looked at her reflection in the mirror for several moments. Her bruises and cuts were long gone apart from a deep scar on her hip. She ran her fingers over it and shuddered with fear when her mind flashed with memories of how it got there. She looked into the mirror and saw Max’s face as it haunted her. She watched him walk up behind her and rap his arms around her bare body… his big warm hands touching her scar and giving it new better memories.

She shivered as the cold hit her with sudden force and quickly made a dive for the warm bath. She lay down on her back and blew on the bubbles so they weren’t suffocating her.

As questions and thoughts starting crawling across her mind, she started to panic and quickly reached for the remote for the portable CD played sitting on the shelf across from her. She turned it on and blasted the music so it drowned out every other noise.

It didn’t help this time. All she could do was think about Max and his words and his touch—

She knew she couldn’t run from it anymore. She wanted to so much. Why did she have to face it? She was perfectly content just pushing the thoughts away from her mind every day and night. Content? Maybe that was the wrong word to describe what she felt towards it.

There was only so much she could take and this was passing the boundary. If she thought about Max’s words, she would admit something to herself that she wasn’t prepared to admit. However, what would happen if she didn’t admit it? What would happen to the one innocent man sitting in jail waiting to be sentenced?

She couldn’t do this. It was too much for her. She got out of the bath and practically ran to her bedroom to get dressed. She put on a pair of jeans and a red sweater and tied her hair up in a pony tale. The first thing her mother said to her when she walked out into the kitchen was:

“That was quick!”

Liz forced a little smile and sat down at the table where her mother had placed two plates. They ate their cake quietly, occasionally talking about everything but. Just like with Max, everything but. When they left for the movies, Liz allowed herself to remember the feel of Max’s lips on hers. She pressed her hand to her mouth and closed her eyes with a sigh. She had never experienced such a wonderful kiss before.

Throughout the comedy, she found herself in a similar situation that she had been in many times throughout the last few weeks. She tried so desperately and frantically to watch the plot of the movie and have it register in her mind but the longer she tried the more frustrated she became. It proved to be useless, for in the end she gave up and closed her eyes to see the man she loved. Ah, relief, She thought. To finally admit it to herself was a grand pleasure that she had not experienced in quite a substantial amount of time.

She thought about his mouth on hers and the sweet taste of his saliva. She imagined his hands on more of her, touching other pleasure places that were aching to be loved. The more images of entangled lovers sent her further and further into what seemed like a red hole so bright she felt her eyeballs singe just with the thought. She crossed and uncrossed her legs and allowed herself nothing but the feeling of pleasure and arousal that she was silently pleading to subside.

She was in the wrong for allowing herself to feel for this man but for these fleeting and breathless moments, she would not withhold the passion she had for so long tried to ignore.

Such a raw range of emotion this kiss had evoked within her. She clenched her hands on her lap and threw her head back. It was unfair. Something like this had finally happened to her and it had to be so far out of her reach. What an impossible situation they were faced with.

When the movie ended, they drove home to a warm house. Liz said she was just going to go to bed, to sleep?

The next morning when she woke up to the birds chirping outside she stretched and rolled her head back. What was the time? Why was she still in bed? Where were the warm inviting arms she so desperately wanted to be there holding her?

Slowly reality rapped around her like a wet blanket and she groaned aloud. Max Evans loved her and she had to go and tell the police to let him go because she loved him too. He would help her heal, he would stop the nightmares and keep her safe until they found the real man.

She glanced at the bedside clock and closed her eyes again when she realized it was only eight-thirty. She could sleep for a little while longer, what would the harm be?

Four and a half-hours later she woke up.

“OH MY GOD!” She screamed. She leapt out of the bed and searched frantically for clothes. Max’s trial had started two and a half-hours ago and would probably be nearing its conclusion by now. She ran through the house and yelled a quick, ‘I’ll be back soon mom!’ before jumping in her car and speeding down the street.

The drive to Albuquerque was longer then it ever had been before. She bit her nails and wiped frantically at her hair to try to make it a little more presentable. Her logical mind was telling her to stop and think about what she was doing.

What if Max was just pretending to be in love with her so she would get him out of there?

What would her parents and Maria say when they found out about what she was going to do?

What if she the things she was feeling were just mistaken emotions brought on by the need to be loved after her horrific attack that trailed behind her like her shadow?

What would happen between she and Max if some miracle happened and he was let free?

What would they be like together if they had the freedom?

Was that dream what was supposed to be?

Was that right?

Was this right?

She pulled up outside the building and ran across the car park as a woman on a mission. She took was outside the door when she heard the word ‘guilty’. Her heart stopped and with a heavy heart she slipped in though the door and stood with her eyes glued to the jury about to read the sentence.

It was obvious he had been proven guilty and she felt an unbelievable rush of pure guilt that she had to grab onto the wall to stay upright.

She only heard these next few words before completely blanking everyone out except the two parents whom cried out and ran towards their son.

“Sentenced to death by lethal injection…”

All the air left her body in one big puff.

“To be carried out tomorrow. Early morning…”

The cries and loud yells at the judge washed over her and if this had been a normal situation, she would have watched with a feeling of relief. If she had hated the man being sentenced, as she should do, if she had never fallen in love. However, this was not normal and she had to turn her gaze away to keep from seeing what was almost as bad as death itself.

Parents touching and hugging their only son for the last time before he was led away from them forever.

She closed her eyes and swallowed the lump in her throat. What to do? This was it, was she going to open her mouth and go up front and say something or was she going to sink into the shadows and hide away from everything that was frightening and different.

She made the decision to move forwards but when she tried, her feet would not let her. She couldn’t do it. She just had too many doubts. Flashes of her attack flooded over her, overtaking everything else and an immense hatred screamed to be let out. If he was the man that did it and she went up there he would be free to come after her again.

Her heart told her it wasn’t him but was her heart always right?

When she opened her eyes it was to see a defeated-looking Max Evans walking towards her with his hands handcuffed behind his back. She couldn’t tear her eyes away if she tried. He saw her and she caught his eyes that were lined with red and tears that threatened to fall. He bit his lip and as he walked past her, his eyes dug into hers. He stopped just before her as he waited for the doors to be opened and she rapped her arms around herself.

I love you, he said with his eyes and when he saw that she didn’t register, he mouthed it. I love you. I love you. I love you. It didn’t say please save me—I expect you to get me out of this. I am waiting for you to tell them. It said one thing and one thing only. He was defeated and he would not fight, but he would let his last feelings be known. With every blink of his eyes it was let be known to her.

I love you.

A thousand times, I love you.

Chapter Eleven

“Liz?”

“Liz, are you okay?”

“Darling?”

Liz blinked once. Twice. Then turned her head to see her father looking at her with a mixture of surprise, shock and worry.

“What are you doing here? I didn’t think you were going to come. Your mother said—“

“I only just got here,” Liz’s voice was dry and creaky. She had to lie down, she had to go somewhere, she just had to NOT be here anymore. What was she thinking?

“Are you okay?” Her father asked. “Did he speak to you? It’s okay love he can’t get to you anymore. Did you hear his sentence? He won’t hurt anyone ever again.”

Liz coiled over. “Oh dad, please I have to leave!” She cried. She turned around and ran out the door to her car. She needed to think. She needed to decide what was right and what was wrong. She told her father she’d be home eventually and drove out to the desert to think.

“Okay Liz,” she said to herself. “Think, think, what do you remember?”

She started to replay the evening of the attack in her head. Tears dripped from her eyes when she saw it unfold before her eyes again. He had long yellow nails and he smelt horrendous, his hair was dark brown, nearly black. He was strong and muscled. That’s all she could remember, she hadn’t been conscious long enough to see his face. The only thing she could trace back to Max being innocent was his hands, they were different, she was sure of it.

“You are such a whimp!” She yelled throwing rocks along the sandy ground. “Just go let him out! You know it’s not him!”

She wanted to tell him she loved him too. It sat on the end of her tongue and even if he couldn’t hear it she wanted to say it anyway. “I love you,” she whispered. “I love you too…Max.”

Why did her whole body scream for her to trust him but only a little part of her told her not too? Why was she listening to the smaller part?

Around five in the afternoon, she finally went home. Maria was there waiting for her and they went into her room to talk. Liz did not feel like talking at all.

“So, where have you been?” Maria asked plopping down onto her bed.

“The desert,” Liz answered simply. She had no desire left to lie.

“What were you doing out there for so long?”

“Thinking.” No desire, no thirst.

Maria propped herself up on her elbows. “About him?”

Liz sat down next to her and besides the lack of communication or cheerfulness between them lately, put her head on her shoulder. “Yes,” she said. She sucked in a deep breath that sounded somewhat like a whimper. “I want my life back,” she said.

“I know you do chinca, I know you do,” Maria kissed her forehead. “You love him don’t you?”

“Yes,” Liz said. Her lungs hurt, her throat hurt, her heart hurt.

She heard Maria take a deep breath. She waited for her to say something but nothing came. “He’s going to die Maria, I just…I can’t have that happen but I’m not confident enough that it wasn’t him to stop it.’

Maria was still quiet. That urged Liz on.

“He kissed me,” she whispered. “Well, I kissed him and…sort of, I don’t know.” She shuddered under the weight on her shoulders. “He thinks he loves me too. We’re both silly aren’t we? Silly, you, lonely people.” She felt Maria start to stroke her hair and she relaxed a little. “I don’t have any proof that it wasn’t him but he’s just…he’s just too wonderful to have done it.’

“This is crazy,” Maria said finally. “Not just silly but confusing and uncalled for. Mostly CRAZY.”

“I know,” Liz said.

They were silent. Their breathing dominated any other noise in the room. Maria opened her mouth and closed it again. Then opened it again, “you remember in the hospital how you said your grandmother believed fate made up for the bad things that happen to us?”

Yes, Liz thought.

“Maybe, you think, fate brought Max to you to help you deal with your attack? Maybe it’s up to you to decide whether he should live or die or not.”

Liz opened her eyes. “I don’t want to make the decision, can’t you? Tell me what you think and I’ll do it.”

“It’s not my decision to make,” Maria said. ‘But you know I’ve got your back no matter what, right?”

“I know,” Liz said. “Thank you.”

“I should get home,” Maria said. “Dinner will be ready soon.”

“Okay,” Liz said. “Just leave my head on the mattress on your way out.”

Maria smiled. “How about I go drown it in the toilet bowl?”

“That’s a good idea too.”

Maria got up. “Everything will be okay,” she said.

“Thank you for saying that but it’s not entirely true.”

Liz put on her jacket before going for a walk later on.

She left her parents while they were watching ‘who wants to be a millionaire?’ They were yelling the answer at the poor contestant on the screen. Had anyone actually ever won the million dollars? Liz didn’t think so.

She carried her wallet in her hand convincing herself that the reason she was out was because she just had to have something chocolate.

“Lone star where are you tonight?” Liz said. This feeling I’m trying to fight its dark and I think that I would give anything for you to shine down on me.

What was his family going through right now? Were his sister and mother in despair, crying their hearts out? Was his best friend reliving all their memories of good and bad times? Was the woman he loved trying to imagine life without him and convincing herself everything will be okay, when really it wasn’t?

Well no, she was here. Going to buy chocolate and trying to convince herself, she was sane.

“Some time you’ll have to explain to your children that you killed your first love. That you had the power to stop it but you didn’t.” She spoke to the cool breeze as though it would offer her solace when all it did was march under her clothes and give her shivers. This was her newest sign of insanity, talking to herself.

Once he was gone, would she slowly start becoming the girl she was last year around this time? Did she want to?

Would she have a happy birthday this year?

Would any of the Evans’ family have a happy birthday ever again? Would Max Evans?”

His sister had lived a happy life till now and her birthday a few months ago had been a very joyous occasion on the poolside. Max had told her that. What had the date been? Maybe next year she could send her a birthday card.

Dear Isabel,
I wish you a very happy birthday,
Love Liz.
PS. Sorry for killing your brother

October the Ninth, that was her birthday. October the ninth, October the Ninth?!!

“OH MY GOD!” Liz exclaimed. A dog replied with a howl in the distance. October the ninth was Isabel’s birthday. October the ninth was the say Liz Parker had been raped of her innocence. October the ninth Max Evans’ had given his sister her favorite cashmere sweater and silver necklace.

She reached the store.

How could he be in two places at once? Maybe he had lied about her birth date?

It was unlikely.

“Chocolate,” she reminded herself trying to focus on the simple things. “I NEED chocolate right now.”

The sliding door opened as she got closer and inside the bright lights stung her eyes.

“Hello,” the young, attractive, boy at the counter said. She smiled at him, seeing nothing but his trainee uniform, with blue Khaki pants and a white button down shirt. If she’d never met Max would she have noticed his good looks?

Who cares.

Four others were in the store. Three middle aged women and one six year old. Put down that porn magazine, Liz thought. Your mothers going to turn around and catch you and then later your father will get yelled at for being crude.

As Liz walked towards the goodies department, she heard the expected, “Oh my goodness! Put that down!”

Liz passed the CD rack on her way to her destination. She stopped and looked. Pink? Eugh, Atomic Kitten? Yuck, The Ketchup Band? Okayyyyy, Dave Mathews Band? Max’s favorite.

She took it with her. Maybe it would like to see the confectionery isle?

Finally she stood in front of what she was ‘craving’.

Caramello? Nuts? Rocky Road? Wafer? So much to choose from! She should have come with a plan.

Caramello-
Pros: Cons:

When a lady walked past, Liz stopped her. “Excuse me,” she said. “What’s your favorite?”

The lady smiled. “Coconut,” she replied.

“Thank you,” Liz said. Coconut it is!

She started heading back to the counter and realized she was still holding Max’s favorite CD. She decided to buy it, she hadn’t added anything to her collection in a while.

She missed the feeling of putting them in alphabetical order, stepping back, and smiling. It was strange how a CD collection seemed much cooler with a new contribution. She told the guy at the counter that.

“How profound of you,” he said.

“Thank you.”

She noticed he was checking her out. When he saw that he’d been caught, he blushed.

“Would you still find me attractive if I were a murderer?” She asked. “Because I am you know.” The sliding door opened and the breeze attacked her ankles.

“Empty your till quickly and no one will get hurt!”

When Liz thought about it, she wasn’t in the least bit scared—not even when the villain pressed his gun to her pulse. “Don’t make me kill her.”

Go ahead, Liz wanted to say. I don’t mind, really I don’t. Put me out of my misery.

She started to say it but he yelled shut up and jabbed her neck harder.

“Shut up!” Why did that sound so familiar? ”Stop screaming and it won’t hurt as much!”

Okay, now she was scared.

She felt his body against her back. She smelt him and saw his hand on her hip. THOSE HANDS!

They were like claws, sharp and painful.

She knew it instantly. It was he, her rapier.

Her heart flew out of her chest and she could see it fly away holding a sign, ‘resigned—under too much pressure.’

The poor by at the counter was helplessly packing the money in the till into a brown shopping bag but all Liz could think and feel was the man behind her. His breath was against her ear and she fought the need to vomit.

Before anyone knew what was happening, sirens and lights filled the air.

“Oh shit,” the rapist cursed.

Liz fought the urge to say aloud, HA HA HA.

The police came in, did their job, and caught him successfully. Afterwards Liz had to sit on a stool and suck on her chocolate while the nice policeman questioned her. She remembered him from when she was questioned about her attack. He remembered her too.

“It was him,” she said instantly. “The man, the man that attacked me! I’m telling you! That was the guy, I know I can tell.”

“What do you mean? He’s in jail—“

“No, Max Evans’ is innocent. That man you just took away was the real guy! You have to stop the execution tomorrow.”
“I-I-I can’t,” the man said. “I’m not authorized…”

“An innocent man will get killed if you don’t.”

“Look, Liz,” the guy said leaning into her. “Go to the execution tomorrow and tell them yourself, I can’t do anything.”

“Please,” Liz begged. “Please try, please.”

He was silent for several minutes. He could see she was trying not to cry. Little did he know it wasn’t because she was scared, Max Evans was innocent, and she didn’t love her attacker!

“Okay,” he said. “I’ll mention to the chef and see what I can do. Do you need a ride home?”

“Yes please.”

He walked her to the door and after he had left Liz’s parents interrogated her, hugged her, and wouldn’t let her go to bed. She told them about Max being innocent and the man at the store being guilty and that seemed to set them off double time.

Finally she said, “Mom, dad, I just want to go to bed. I am a little shaken up, yes, but if I don’t sleep soon I won’t be able to get up in the morning and go set Max free. You have no idea how much it means to me that you care so much but can I please go now?”

They let her go and as she walked away she heard her mother say, “Imagine that! The night before his death the real guy is caught. He’ll be thanking God in the morning!”

Liz tried to sleep that night but she couldn’t. All she could do was cry happy tears that Max wasn’t guilty and listen to her new Dave Mathews CD. She felt as if a huge weight had been lifted off her shoulders only leaving a little amount in its place. Now what was going to happen? She wondered. What would happen between she and Max?

Could they be together? Would everyone understand?

In the morning she drove to Albuquerque with her parents and ran across the parking lot. It took her forever to finally get to the room that saw death on daily bases. She had to be checked for weapons and led down a long corridor. Finally she barged into the room and yelled at the top of her lungs without thinking:

“STOP! He’s innocent!”

[nicola]

Chapter Twelve

Liz heard the room go silent and opened her eyes to see a large group of people. She glanced towards the head of the room where a wall of glass separated the criminal from the audience. She had the attention of everyone now. She knew it was silly of her to just barge inside and not think about the option Max wasn’t in this room yet but she hadn’t been able to stop herself. Luckily, she had got it right.

She ran up to the glass and pounded on it with her fists. “Please! Stop! You have to get him off there he’s innocent! I am LIZ PARKER! I his supposed victim and I’m telling you, that’s not the guy!” Max was strapped to a table and he turned his to look at her through the glass. Was he dead already?
“Please,” Liz started to sob. She was so overwhelmed. “Stop! Please, he is innocent. You have to believe me. Last night a man was arrested at the Bardowie convenience store in Roswell and he was the REAL guy! Let Max go!”

She heard gasps from the people behind her and they started talking. “What do you mean he’s innocent? How do you know?” Someone asked.

A guard came through a door to her left and approached her. “Miss, I’m going to have to ask you to take a seat.”

“What?” Liz asked. “Are you crazy? Are you not listening to me? He’s innocent, innocent, you can’t kill an innocent man! Please, you have to at least contact the Roswell police and see that I’m telling the truth.”

The man looked conflicted, he glanced over at the other guards behind the glass and they all looked just as confused. “Look girlie…”

Liz huffed, she could see he wasn’t going to be any help. She ran over to the door he had just emerged from and pulled it open. He shouted and came after her but didn’t reach her until she was on the other side of the glass. “Max!” She yelled. “I’m sorry I didn’t believe you. I do now, I know… I think I knew all along!” She was just about to touch him when she was yanked back by a guard.

“What the hell do you think you are doing?” He rapped his arms around her to stop her struggling.

Liz glanced up and glared at all the people in the audience, with her eyes she pleaded with them to believe her but they all watched blankly. She finally spotted Max’s father sitting at the back his eyes filled with tears and his hand over his mouth. The door opened and her heroes walked through. Her parents and Sergeant Yield from the police station.

“Stop the execution. This man is innocent,” he said. The guards agrued with him for several minutes but knowing he was a in a higher position in the force they didn’t have much of a choice. As soon as Max was free he ran to Liz and she threw herself into his arms. She cried onto his chest and tried to hold him as close as she could.

“I love you too Max, I do, I don’t know how it’s possible but I do and I’m so sorry for doubting you.” She felt him kiss the top of her head.

“None of that matters, don’t be sorry,” he said hoarsly. He clutched her head to him and his other arm was around her neck.

“I love you,” she whispered. His body was so hard and if she had ever had a chance to feel him like this before she would have known instantly he wasn’t her attacker. His body felt so different, it felt so inviting, it fited hers perfectly.

Max smiled and she lifted her head up to look at him. Their lips touched and despite the shock it caused they would not stop. Liz kissed him, pouring all her love into him in every way she knew how. Max held her so tightly she thought she would pop and that was okay with her.

Max’s father banged on the glass, wanting to be let in to see his son. The guards would not let him and demanded that Max go back to his cell until the mess was sorted out. They started pulling him away from Liz but she held on. “No,” she said. “Don’t…”

“I’ll be okay Liz, I’ll be out soon. Thank you… thank you for saving my life.”

She watched him go and then turned to her parents who were looking at her shocked. Reality came crashing back down on her and she blushed and wiped her eyes. She couldn’t believe how out of her head she ahd been. “Mom…dad…” She started.

“What the hell was that Lizzie?” Her father asked.

Philip caught her attention and she swallowed. “I’ll be right back…” she told her parents. She stood directly in front of him and looked up at his emotional face.

“Who are you?” He asked his voice cracking. “Thank you,” he started to cry. “Thank you; you saved my sons life, my life.”

Liz felt her eyes sting. “He was innocent, I’m so sorry for what you have been put through…”

Surprisingly, the man grabbed her and pulled her into a hug. He sobbed and whispered quiet priers for her. When he pulled away he wiped his eyes with his wrist and sniffled. “I have to get home, I have to tell my wife…Isabel! Oh my God, thank you so much, thank you.”

“Don’t thank me,” she said. She watched him leave and then turned to her parents who were talking quietly to each other. Someone came up behind her, she was holding a hankercheif to her nose and her eyes were rimmed with red.

“You’re Liz Parker?” She asked quietly. Liz suspected she was in her late thirty’s or early forties. Her hair was curly and she wore bright red lipstick and pink tights.

“Yes,” Liz replied.

“I’m Stella Carmichael’s mother,” she said. Liz knew instantly, the mother of the first victim. God she hated the man that had caused so much pain to so many.

“Oh…” Liz said. “I’m so sorry about…”

She shook her head. “Don’t be, I’m sorry to hear about your…attack…I just, you really think that Max Evans’ didn’t do this?”

Liz nodded. “I’m certain. But don’t worry, the guy has been caught and the same sentence will be taken out on him, I just know it.”

She sniffled. “You’re the only one alive left to know so…if your certain.” She rapped her arms around herself. “I have to be going, I just had to make certain…”

“I’m certain, and please…I’m so sorry about Stella.”

“Huh,” the woman said shrugging. “Well we can atleast be glad she didn’t have to live with the experience weighing on her shoulders.”

Like me, Liz thought. “Yes,” she said. “That’s one thing.”

When she left Liz went home with her parents and instantly they asked about what was going on with Max. She could do nothing but tell the truth. Maria came around and she confessed all to them and then went to her room. They weren’t happy, and why would they be? They tried to convince her that she was just trying to get relief from somewhere, and she was, but was that a bad thing? Was it a bad thing to fall in love with someone who could maybe help her heal? She didn’t think she was guilty of anything, but she had a lot of thinking to do.

What would happen now?

Max…well, he was free and she loved him but it was soon. It was so soon, she didn’t think she could be in a relationship. Her nights were still plagued with horrendous memories and she needed to restore her faith in man kind before she even thought of being with someone. Would Max understand that? Would he just be content with being free and not pursue her now?

What they had shared, it wasn’t something most teenagers had to endure but they had and they had found some relief from it together. Now that his trauma was over, would he go back to Boston and continue with his life? He wanted to be a doctor, surely he would work hard now to catch up with work. He wouldn’t have time for her anyway.

After a sleepless night of thinking Liz had come to no conclusions and was more confused then ever. Maria was there for her, even though she didn’t completely agree with what was going on. Alex was wonderful too.

It took three days for Max to be freed. Everything had to be sorted out, Liz had to go in for questioning twice. She wasn’t very impressed by the inadequacy in which things worked and openly went about admitting it. She said that they never should have made this mistake and complained several times. When Max was let out she was happy but made no attempts to get ahold of him or go see him. What would they say to eachother if they were alone together?

In the confinement they had talked with ease but she wasn’t sure it would be like that now. She knew they would need to discuss where they stood and she was terrified of having that conversation with him. She didn’t know for certain why, she wasn’t afraid of him denying her, or hating her, she was quite certain he didn’t.

It was this, not knowing why she was afraid, that caused her to finally try and reach him three days after his being released. She knew that he could have been trying to get ahold of her but she wasn’t certain. She went to his motel.

The lady at the counter said that their check out date was today and she didn’t know if they were still there. Liz sprinted to their motel room praying and hoping she wasn’t too late, knowing Max couldn’t have left without saying goodbye. He just couldn’t have.

She banged on the door with her fists and almost sang out for joy when Isabel opened it. “Yes?” She asked. She even glanced around her making sure no one else was there, not believing it had been little Liz who had caused so much noise.

“Is Max here?” Liz asked.

Isabel frowned. She was just about to open her mouth to reply when the man himself ran up behind her. “Liz?” He said.

She let out a relieved breath. “Max,” she said.

Max looked at Isabel and she huffed and walked back inside the room. Max walked out of the room and closed the door. “Liz, I’m so happy to see you…” he blushed at his forwardness. “I didn’t know how to get a hold of you, you got here just in time.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t come sooner,” she said quietly.

“I understand.” There was a short silence before he said, “come on, let’s go over there, we need to…talk.”

Liz almost wanted to say, no let’s not. She didn’t really want to talk, what she had to say was embarrassing and weak. Not to mention pathetic.

The rooms were set out in a big square that were connected by a belcony. In the middle was a pool and playground. They walked in silence to the playground and when they got there Liz sat down on a swing and clutched the chains with all her might.

Max sat down on the swing next to her and left his hands in his lap. “I know this must be hard for you,” he said.

“You too,” she mumbled.

“No, not as hard.” He chuckled to try and lighten the mood. It didn’t help. “Look, I’ll understand if you don’t want to be… well, hmm…this is a lot at once to have to handle.”

“Yeah,” Liz said glancing at him. He was so beautiful. “Is that what you want, to be together?” She had to know.

“Yes,” he answered instantly and surely. That frightened Liz immensly. What he said next soothed her to some extent, “But I know that what happened to you, that’s not something you just get over in one night.”

“Same for you,” she said.

“Hmm,” he said. “But for you… I understand if you don’t want to ever see me again, not only because of what I was accused of, but also because I’m a male,” he sighed, “and to be with someone so soon after your attack may not be okay with you. You know how I feel, I still feel that way, and that means that I will respect whatever decision you make.”

When he looked at her he could see she was trying not to cry. He wanted to hug her so much.

“I-I,” Liz said on the verge of tears. “I’m not ready,” she whispered. “I want to be, God I want to be so much…but it’s too soon. I’m sorry.” She wiped her eyes with the tips of her fingers and then looked at him with her big sad, defenceless eyes. His heart was breaking but all he could think was how broken she was and how torn she was and he couldn’t be upset for himself. “If I’m ever ready, I want you…I just I can’t now,” she spoke quietly. “I think you should go back to Boston.”

He didn’t say anything.

“Get back on track, get your life back and try and forget me,” she said. “I’m just a burden for you, something that will just make your life a whole lot more complicated. People won’t understand anyway…”

“You aren’t a burden,” Max said. “And what if I want my life to have you, even if it is complicated? People don’t matter, who cares if they don’t understand. It has nothing to do with them.” He reached across and took one of her hands in his. “If you want me to leave, I will, but don’t turn me away because of other reasons other then what you think.”

Liz’s lower lip trembled. She knew what she could be throwing away and that made her heart hurt. “I’m not saying it’s forever…” She realized what she was saying and stopped. She couldn’t say that, what if he wasn’t prepared to wait for her? He sure as hell didn’t have to, what if he met someone he liked? “I mean, I will be starting at Boston University in two months and if we see eachother and want…I mean if you don’t want me then, then we can just forget about everything but if we…” They both knew that there was no way they would just forget about eachother. A hole in their hearts had been dug out and filled in with eachother, they were in love and that wasn’t going to just go away.

“Click, again?”

“Yes,” Liz said sadly. “Then maybe I’ll be, more comfortable with the situation.”

They stared at eachother for several minutes before Max’s mother called at him from their room. “Max, we are leaving honey.”

When his father came out he stopped short and glared at Liz. “That’s the girl,” he spoke to Diane. “She’s the one that told the guards about Max.”

Diane was shocked and quickly walked over and hugged Liz. “Thank you,” she said. “Thank you so much.”

Liz felt awkward. “You really, don’t have to thank me…”

“Mom,” Max said. “Can you give us a minute please?”

Diane looked back and forth between the two and nodded. “Off course, not too long huh? We want to get the show on the road.”

When she was gone Liz took Max’s hand in hers, much like he had done with hers. “Do you understand, why I need this? You do mean a lot to me, I do love you,” she blushed, “I can’t believe how bizarre this is!”

Max smiled. “Yes, it is different. Liz, I completely understand, I knew that it wouldn’t be easy if I ever got out but I think what we have, do you feel it? It’s different, it’s worth it.”

Liz nodded to herself. “Yes,” she said. “It is.”

They stood up and stood in front of eachother sadly. “Augh!” Liz said. “I’m sorry, I hate feeling so pathetic.”

“Don’t…please don’t think that, you are not pathetic.” Max reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “You aren’t, at all. I’ll be waiting in Boston for you, first day I expect to see you.”

She smiled. “You don’t think you’ll forget about me by then?” She asked.

“Not a chance!” Max said. They rapped their arms around eachother and hugged eachother tight. “I’m going to miss our conversations,” he said.

“So am I,” Liz whispered starting to cry again. “I can’t believe I’m doing this.”

“It’s only two months,” Max said, convincing her and himself. “We’ll see eachother again.”

Liz looked up at him and they couldn’t help it, they kissed. Max’s eyes closed and he ran his hand through her hair pulling her close. Liz opened her mouth to him, allowing his tongue to massage hers. They were rudely pulled apart when they heard Isabel’s:

“OH MY GOD MAX!”

Max blushed and buried his face in Liz’s silky hair. “Damn, she can be so annoying.”

“Try having no siblings, it’s so boring,” Liz said. They stepped apart and walked to the car holding hands. Isabel shot Max a shocked look.

“Calm down Is, jeez,” he said. Outside the car they hugged and kissed again, this time only a peck since his parents were there. “God, I’m going to miss you,” Liz whispered shyly.

“I’m going to miss you too,” Max said.

When he left Liz stood there on the sidewalk for a long time. She felt like her life just got a whole lot dimmer. Little did she know, the next two months were going to be harder on her then she had first anticipated.

Chapter Thirteen

“Maria, what about this one?”

Liz frantically pulled clothing out of her wardrobe and threw them down on her bed. Today was her first day at Boston University and after two months of loneliness and depression she was finally going to see Max again. She wanted to look stunning the first time he saw her and just in case he had forgotten her, she wanted to make him remember with a bang.

When he had left Albuqurque two months ago she hadn’t realized what it meant to be in love with him. If she had known what pain and longing she was going to feel she never would have let him leave without atleast getting his phone number or address. She had buried herself in work to try and keep her thoughts off him.

“Liz, I’m on the phone! I’ll be with you in two minutes,” Maria said. She was sitting in front of her mirror putting on her lip liner with the portable phone resting inbetween her shoulder and her cheek.

Liz held her three-quarter denim skirt up to her thighs and bit her lip. She could wear that and her white v-neck tank top with the thick sleeves? “No, no that’s not good enough…” she spoke to herself.

Maria finally finished on the phone and came over to inspect the damage. “Liz, chinca, what are you doing?” She asked.

“Maria! I am dying here, I HAVE to look good today, it is so important.” Looking at Liz now you never would have guessed what she had been through last year. She was no longer the frail little broken girl who couldn’t be alone by herself without thinking of the attack. She had spent these last two months sorting her life out and deciding what she wanted.

Max Evans was what she wanted. The longing to see him again had grown every single day despite all the confusion and lecturing from her parents and occasionally her friends. Once Maria saw that there was no convincing that being with Max was a bad idea she had given up and decided it was best to just deal with it.

Liz was recovering remarkably well. She still had nightmares and woke up at night crying and screaming out for help but her parents were always there for her. Well, they had been for the one-month she remained at home, for the other month when Liz and Maria moved to Boston; Maria had been the one to comfort her during the night.

“Calm down,” Maria said. “I’m here, have no fear.” She sorted through the clothing, putting some back in the wardrobe and back in the draws. When she was done, she presented Liz with a knee-length red-skirt and a black lace shirt. “Go try it on, I bet you’ll look wonderful.”

When Liz came out, she spun around smiling happily. “It’s perfect! Thank you Maria, thank you!”

“Don’t thank me, let’s do you hair or you’ll be late.”

Ten minutes later she walked up the concrete steps to her first lecture of the day - of her life. She didn't know when she would be so lucky as to run into Max but she hoped it would be soon. It wouldn't be very good if she didn't pay attention in class because her thoughts were else where.

Her first class was an early one so there weren't many people around unless they had a specific purpose of the morning. She walked nervously down the corridors biting her lip and taking in her surroundings. When rounding a corner she unexpectedly bumped into a young woman and quickly apologized.

"It's fine," the girl said. "You must be new." She glanced around Liz and called out suddenly, "Isabel, wait a moment would you?" She glanced back at Liz. "Excuse me."

Liz stepped out of her way but couldn't help but glance backward to see the girls she was talking to. It couldn't possibly be—?

It was. Isabel Evans stood several meters away tapping her foot impatiently on the tiled floor. She stopped when she saw Liz. "Oh my," she spoke, "it's you."

Liz couldn't believe her luck. It wasn't even eight'o clock and she had already run into someone who could help her. The girl Liz had bumped into looked back and forth between the two. "You know each other?" She asked.

Isabel walked quickly up to Liz and stopped directly in front of her. "Well, won't my brother be happy to see you," she said.

"I-I," Liz stuttered.

"I know you haven't seen him yet," Isabel said. "He isn't here yet."

Liz opened her mouth to ask when he was going to be here when she spoke again.

"I don't know if you know but you'll find here at three out in the quad near the C dorm building." She turned to walk away. "Oh, and if you hurt him I swear to God..." She trailed off and shot Liz a 'I'm not kidding' look before marching off with the other girl.

"Well," Liz mumbled to herself. "What a way to start the morning."

She ran to her class, now running slightly late and took a seat near the back. The professor had been running late so she was saved from humiliation, thank God. While she prepared she heard the girls in front of her speaking and couldn't help but eavesdrop when she heard the object of her affections name mentioned.

"So he's returned?" One of them said. "I knew he would. I said that then too, when everyone was talking about him, I said he's just not the type and I wouldn't believe it."

One of the other girls snorted. "Yeah right, as I recall I heard you say that he was too good be true and him being a murder was totally called for."

"No way!" The girl cried. "I would never say that."

"Yes you would. You’re only trying to defend yourself because now he's back your going to try and sink your claws into him again."

"I don't know if I should waste my time, he just isn't interested. Maybe he's gay. Alice asked him out at that party last year and he said no, I mean who of straight mind says no to her? For some reason every male seems to find her perfect."

"God knows why, I don't think she's that wonderful. Totally fake I'm telling you. He probably just sees straight through her. I don’t blame him."

Liz knew it was rude to listen to their conversation but she couldn't help it. She couldn't be more relieved that it sounded like Max hadn't found anyone.

"It's such a shame!" A red head that was yet to say anything entered the conversation. "He is just so yum, and genuine. It is so hard to find a nice guy that doesn't just want in your pants. He's the real deal!"

The professor entered the room at this moment and that ended all chatter. "Good morning and welcome to your dreaded class of the year," he said. "We're going to begin with something I know you all will love, my favorite, calculus."

The guy next to Liz groaned. "No chance of him going easy on us first day huh?"

Liz smiled sympathetically at him.

"The names Raymond, Raymond Tim’s, and you?" He was a tall lanky guy with spiked light brown hair and green eyes. He had a freckle above the left of his lip and long eyelashes that made his face have a feminine quality to it. He was good-looking but not spectacular and hearts stopping like someone else she knew.

"Liz Parker, it’s nice to meet you," she said.

"Yeah," he grinned. "That name, I'm sure I've heard it before."

Liz shrugged. "Oh…"

After the papers got a hold of what had happened to her and to her real attacker, her name had been published in every paper around America. Luckily, her picture wasn't published, then it would have been worse. The police had advised her to change her name if she wanted to avoid confrontation but Liz was not willing to part with her real, birth name. She would just have to deal with what was thrown her way. In Roswell it hadn't been that bad, but here in Boston she was having trouble, and that was before school had started.

Luckily for Max, his story had not been included in the papers. She was so glad that he could well and truly return to his life without hassle. She just hoped he had caught up with his study.

The papers had been the cause of most of her troubles in the past two months so knowing that he hadn't had to deal with the same annoyances gave her relief.

After her class was finished, she walked to the bookstore on the corner where she was meeting Maria to buy the extra books they needed for this semester. She was waiting outside and they walked in together, the store was quite crowded.

"So?" Maria asked. "Any sign of loverboy yet?"

Liz blushed. "Maria I wish you wouldn't call him that. And in answer to your question, no I haven't seen him yet but I did see his sister and she told me where I would find him at three."

"You have a class at three," Maria said. "What are you going to do?"

"My class starts at two and finishes at three-thirty. I'm hoping, praying, that maybe he'll still be there then."

"Well, for your sake I hope he is too," Maria said. "After this, we have to go get coffee at that cute little place in the mall. Though, we can’t spend that much now I am a in-debt student.”

Liz smiled. “We both are, no more going shopping every Saturday.”

Maria whimpered. “How will we survive?” She said. She kissed Liz’s cheek. “So, see any hot guys in your new class?”

“I wasn’t looking Maria!” Liz cried.

“Oh sure! What about the professor is he worth paying attention to?” Maria asked.

Liz screwed her face up in disgust. “He has to be at least sixty with saggy man breasts and all.”

Maria growled. “Damn, I should wash my mouth out.”

“But there’s still other classes,” Liz mumbled.

“But there’s still other classes,” Maria agreed laughing. “I knew you had it in you,” she said.



Liz glanced at her watch for the fifth time and sighed when she saw that she still had five minutes to go. She was so nervous her palms were sweating. What would they say to each other when they met?

There was still the chance that he had found himself a girlfriend and had forgotten about her but from what Isabel had said, that seemed unlikely.

Finally the class was dismissed and Liz practically ran from the room and down the one hundred steps to the front. She had found out where C block was earlier and knew where saw was going. She had to walk past the building she and Maria’s dorm room was in to get there. Originally she had planned to stay with relatives when she got to Boston but she decided she wanted to be more independent and ended up sharing a dorm with her best friend. Her choice was proving to be a good one.

To Liz’s despair it was pouring down with rain outside and when she got to the quad next to C block no one who was sane was there. She guessed that the rain had changed Max’s choice of scenery and now she wouldn’t get to see him. Liz walked dejectedly back to her dorm, not caring about the rain. She had wanted to see him so much and now she was so disappointed.

She caught the elevator up to the forth floor and when she got to her room she fell back onto her bed and snuggled into her pillow. What she felt easily resembled pain. Worst things had happened to her but right now nothing seemed harder to endure then this.



Max chewed on his pencil as he read the line in front of him over for the third time. He had been working no stop for three hours with no breaks. It had been the same yesterday and the day before that and the day before that. He hadn’t had a break since he got back from jail. Thankfully, the professors hadn’t been that hard on him and hopefully in another three or four weeks he would be completely back on track again.

Trying to concentrate on reading on the line again, he failed. With a sigh he threw the pencil down onto his desk and turned his chair around to face the window. Outside he could see people running about trying to get out of the rain, some had umbrellas and coats, and some didn’t.

“Max.” Isabel walked into his dorm room unannounced and uninvited as usual. “Mom said that she expects you at home for dinner tonight. You need a break; you’ve been working to hard.”

“I have to work this hard,” Max said.

Isabel plonked back onto his double bed positoned in the corner of the room. “So, did you see her?’

Max frowned. “What?”

“The infamous Liz Parker,” Isabel held her hand up in front of her face to inspect her nails. “I ran into her this morning in the main building. I told her that you’d be in the quad at three like you always are.”

The color drained from Max’s face. “I didn’t go today,” he said. He had been getting ready to go and then the sudden change in weather had prevented him.

“Oh,” Isabel said.

He cursed to himself. She was here, he had been waiting for her and dying to see her again and he had missed her. He couldn’t believe it, this certainly was very unfair. “Well, what was she—?” He didn’t know what to ask. Did she look stunning like the so many other times he’d seen her?

“We didn’t really talk, oh well, I talked, and she just stood there. I had a class to get too and I think she did too.” Isabel got up.

“Isabel,” Max said, “what class? What class was she going to?” Maybe that would help him find her.

“I don’t know Max, I’m sorry.”

Max sighed. He couldn’t believe his bad luck.

“So, you are coming to dinner tonight right?” Isabel asked. “Mom won’t take no for an answer.”

“I don’t really fell like going out…” Max trailed off.

Isabel rolled her eyes. “You can’t just mope around here. Please come, mom will be hell at dinner if you don’t come.”

He really didn’t want to. “Fine, I’ll be there at six-thirty.”

“Great!” Isabel said. “See you then!”

After she left Max got changed into some sports shorts and started working out. After doing one hundred press-ups his thoughts were still focused on the petite girl he was longing for. With a heavy heart, he made his way to the showers


Chapter Fourteen

“Liz, I wouldn’t worry too much. You’ll probably see him tomorrow,” Maria tried to comfort her upset friend. “And if you don’t see him in the morning you can go to the quad at three and see if he’s there.”

Liz drank water from her water bottle, not stopping her running on the treadmill. “You’re right, you are completely right.” She panted as she ran. “And if I don’t see him I can go to administration and ask what dorm building he is in and search for him that way.”

“Exactly!” Maria said. “So what are we upset about?”

Liz stopped running. She didn’t have an answer to that. “I guess I’m just over anxious.”

“Yes, love tends to take the best of us.” Maria got off her bike and grabbed her bag off the ground. “What should we have for dinner tonight?”

“Let’s go to my Aunts house,” Liz said. “She invited us and she is the best cook.”

“Okay,” Maria said as they headed for the showers.

The next morning Liz had a class with Professor Rick Heart. Max had spoken to her about him when he was in the confinement and he had even reccomended him as one of the most excellent science teachers.

She wanted to make a good impression so she got there early and found him writing at his desk. He smiled warmly at her and said good morning.

“Morning,” Liz replied.

“And may I ask who have the pleasure of having in my course group this morning?” He asked. He had short black hair, wore glasses and had a slight goatie. Liz had to admit he was by far the best looking of her professors. And the youngest, he had to be in his late twenties the latest, early thirties.

Liz smiled. “My name is Liz Parker, it’s nice to meet you. I have heard a lot about your work.”

“You have?” He asked. “I’m glad, all good?”

“Yes, all compliments,” Liz replied.

He chuckled. “Well, if I ask will you tell me who has been speaking so fondly on me?” He took off his glasses and looked at her. There were four other students in the room already in their seats.

“Of course,” Liz said. “Max Evans is the culprit.”

“Max Evans!” Professor Heart exclaimed. “Well, I should hope he speaks well of me. We are very good friends. He’s my beer buddy.”

“Beer buddy?” Liz asked surprised.

“Yeah, don’t tell anyone.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “So how do you know Max Evans?”

“We’re…friends,” Liz said.

“Well he’s a great guy, has a big future a head of him. In fact, I saw him yesterday. He’s been working hard lately, barely having breaks. So, Liz, was it?”

“Yeah.”

“What are your hopes for the future?” He asked.

“I want to be a molecular biologist,” Liz said. “I always have, even when I was a little girl.”

He smiled. “Well it’s good you know what you’re going to do with yourself. You have chosen yourself a good career and I will like you more for it.”

Liz was about to go take her seat when she suddenly thought of something. “I know this is going to sound strange but…could you tell me where Max’s dorm room is?”

Professor Heart raised his eyebrows. “If you can assure me if you won’t vandalize his room, because then he’ll come and blame me for giving his whereabouts out.”

Liz laughed. “I promise I won’t do anything unorthodox.”

“Well then, by all means, of course I’ll tell you. He’s in the C block building,” he paused. “Do you know where that is?”

“Yes,” Liz replied.

“Go up to the third floor and he’s in number 3D.”

“Thank you,” Liz said. She quickly memorized what he had said. C Block third floor, 3D. Now she had to get up the courage to go there.

“My pleasure, just don’t make me regret telling you.”

“I won’t.” Liz flashed him a smile before going and taking her seat at the front. She was going to love this class.

After the hour and half passed Liz put all her things in her bag and headed out of the class. The professor came to talk to her outside the door. “Liz, I was very impressed with your synopsis in there, I think you’ll fit in perfectly here.”

“Thank you,” Liz said. “That means a lot; I’ve been really worried about not being able to find my place.”

“You won’t have a problem,” he said. “See you on Thursday…Oh look there’s everyone’s favorite guy in the flesh.”

Liz’s head shot in the direction he was looking and she was rewarded. Walking in her direction was drool-worthy Max Evans. He was walking with two females and another guy, they were laughing over something and he hadn’t seen her yet. Her heart fluttered in her chest, he looked breathtaking and perfect like the last time she had seen him.

“Max!” Professor Heart called.

Max looked over and stopped short. His friends looked at him oddly.

When he gathered his bearings he swallowed and tried to get his heart under control. “Hey, I’ll catch up with you later,” he said.

“You’re going to be late…” His friend Ben said.

Max waved them off.

Liz was looking at him and he was looking right back. He couldn’t believe it, finally! His heart sang. His feet weren’t going to fail him now; he walked in their direction.

“Hey Max, how is the studying going?” Professor Heart asked.

“Long, and drawn out but going, hopefully I’ll be caught up soon,” Max said. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from Liz.

The professor noticed this. “Well, I have to go. See you later Liz, it was nice meeting you. Bye Max.”

“Bye,” they both said in unison.

Liz smiled shyly at Max. She didn’t know what to say.

He smiled back. “I was beginning to wonder if I’d ever find you,” he said.

She felt like crying she was so happy. “Yeah I was wondering the same, I mean I thought that too,” she said. She scolded herself, some first thing to say! She held the strap of her black bag tightly between her fingers.

“I am so happy to see you,” he admitted. “You have no idea…”

“I do.” She wanted to hug him.

“You look,” his eyes roamed over her. “Wonderful,” he breathed out. “God I wish we could go somewhere but I have to go to my class, please… can I meet you somewhere afterwards?”

“Of course,” Liz said. “Of course, I demand you do. I’ll meet you at the quad by C block at three-thirty?”

“Okay,” he said. He couldn’t bring himself to walk away. “God seeing you…”

“I know,” she said blushing.

“Can I—?” He stepped closer. He didn’t know whether to ravish her or wrap her in his arms and never let her go. She decided for him, she wrapped her arms around his waist and they shared a brief but meaningful hug.

When she pulled away, she had tears in her eyes. “You better go; I don’t want to be the cause of your lateness…”

“Okay,” he said. He couldn’t help himself, he kissed her cheek. “I’ll see you at three-thirty, don’t let me down.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” Liz said.

He walked away backwards, not able to tear his eyes away. Finally, when he rounded a corner and was gone from sight she couldn’t help but hop up and down twice in merriment. She practically floated to her lunch date with some of her female friends. All she could think about was three thirty. Would he kiss her? She was dying for him to kiss her. Was he thinking of her during his class? If so, what was he thinking? She barely participated in the conversation throughout lunch and afterwards ran home to freshen up.

She brushed her hair, reapplied her makeup, and then headed down to the quad ten minutes early. As she walked there she was surprised and ecstatic that he was already there waiting. He was sitting on the concrete bench with his elbows on his thighs and his face his in his hands. She walked up to him silently and sat down close to him. He looked up, shocked slightly, and smiled. “Hey,” he said.

“Hi,” she said. “How was class?”

“It stretched out longer then I had hoped,” he answered honestly. He tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear. She was so beautiful, she hadn’t changed at all, and he hadn’t expected her to. He had to know if she felt the same way so he cut right to the chase. “How was your two months? How do you feel?” He asked.

She knew what he was asking. She took his hand in hers and entwined their fingers. “I did what I said I would and healed. I’m still having my moments occasionally but I’m fine and happy and feel great.”

“You have no idea how happy and relieved that makes me,” he said. “I didn’t stop thinking about you, not for one second.”

She smiled. “Good, I didn’t want you to.” She squeezed his hand. “I was stupid to let you leave like that without making sure I had some way of getting a hold of you. I regretted it, I missed you unbearably. Is that all right to say?”

He nodded. “I feel the same. I knew nothing would change that. Seeing you again, it just…it’s bringing back everything I felt when you’d come and see me in the confinement. I used just pray you’d come and see me. What I said two months ago, I still mean it all.”

Tears filled her eyes. “Max I was so worried you’d change your mind!” She threw her arms around his neck and hugged him. “I’m so glad, no ecstatic that you still love me. I love you too, I never stopped and all I could think about was you.”

His heart leapt in attempt to handle all the feelings of content he was experiencing. He hugged her tight, she smelt so wonderful. “I want to be with you,” she said. “I had to lose you to see what we had. I know it makes no sense considering the circumstances but now that I’m here, I couldn’t want anything more in my life.”

Max couldn’t believe it; the girl he had been yearning for loved him back. Today was the best day of his life. He cupped her cheeks and wiped the tears from her eyes. The prospect of her being his was just too much for him, he couldn’t believe it. Before he could open his mouth and say anything, she kissed him fervently on the lips. He closed his eyes and kissed her back, was there any feeling better then that of her lips moving up and down against his?

He had kissed other girls before but none of them had meant to him what Liz did. Sparks shot through him where he was touching her and his body felt alive tingling in sensation.

They broke apart only when they absolutely had to. Liz panted, trying to breathe in all the air she had just missed. “Max, where can we go? I have so much to ask you, we have so much to talk about.”

He smiled gorgeously. “Anywhere, where do you want to go? My dorm room is just through there,” he offered motioning to the C Block building.

“I know,” she said. “Professor Heart told me.”

He raised his eyebrows.

“I asked him, in hopes of finding you,” she said. “Come on, let’s go.” She stood up and took his hand. “Show me the way.”

He stood up and not daring to let go of her hand led her towards his dorm. They rode the elevator in silence but leaning against each other. When they were in his dorm Max frantically tried to pick up some of the open books, he’d left lying around.

“Someone’s been studying,” she commented.

Max cleared a place for her to sit on his bed. “You could say that,” he said.

She sat down and took in her surroundings. His room was the typical male dorm room and she loved it. Maybe she would get to see a lot of it in the near future. She hoped so. “Professor Heart said you’d been working hard lately, is that to catch up? How are you doing?”

Max sat down beside her. “Yes, and I am doing well, I’m nearly caught up. Just a few more weeks and I’ll be back on track again. I don’t have much time lately, all I do is study in here and then the rest of my time is spent in classes and going to work.” He looked worn-out now that she looked at him closely. Liz wished she could do something to help him relax.

Little did she know just what her mere presence was doing for him. They sat not touching because neither of them were sure what they were ready for. Max wanted to hold her but he didn’t know how she would feel about that. Liz’s thoughts were much the same.

“Well, first of all,” she said teasingly. “By the looks of it you’ve got this whole studying thing all wrong. Never study at your desk; get comfortable somewhere, like your bed. When you are relaxed and unperturbed it’s easier to concentrate.”

Max chuckled. “What, you’re in your first year here and your telling me, in my third year?”

She smiled. “Well just because you’ve been here longer doesn’t mean you have got it right. You are in some obvious need of study lessons.” She had her hand on the bed beside her.

“Well maybe you’ll just have to assist me,” he said. He was afraid that in these next few weeks if he wanted to spend time with her it would have to be here while he was reading a textbook. He hated that but he had to catch up. He told her that.

She touched his arm. “I understand,” she said. “And I’ll gladly help you study, if you help me…” she picked up the closest book. “The small intestine huh?”

“We have to start somewhere,” he said. “Tell me what you’ve been up to these past two months, tell me everything. I saw some things in the paper.”

“You did?” She said. “Yeah, unfortunately my family couldn’t stop them from printing anything. I’m so relieved that there wasn’t anything printed about you.”

“I was lucky. Everyone here on campus pretty much knows about what happened but there was nothing anyone could do about that.” Everyone knew about what happened but no one knew about the strange love story that had been created as well.

Liz remembered yesterday morning. “Yesterday in my Calc class I was sitting behind some females that had a very high opinion of you nevertheless.”

Max frowned. “Who?” he asked.

“I don’t know who they were but apparently you’re much admired around here,” she said smiling. “The real deal, if I heard right.”

“Okay then,” Max said. “Whatever that means.”

Liz laughed. “Males never know.”

Would it be too forward if she lay down and snuggled into him? She couldn’t believe how lucky she was to find this astonishing guy.

He noticed that she wanted to say something and that she kept folding and unfolding her legs. “Are you comfortable?” He asked.

She opened her mouth then closed it again and bit her lip. She shook her head, no, and then summoning all her courage, she said. “Max where do we stand now?”

“We stand wherever you want us to,” he said.

She grinned. “So that means I can lie down and get comfortable?” She slid off her shoes and crawled onto the bed so she could lie down with her head on his pillows. She took off her denim jacket and threw it on the floor as she had wanted to since she first entered the room. Max swallowed, his dream girl was lying on his bed! He must be in heaven!

She motioned him to lie on his back next to her and he did, gladly. She rested her head on his chest and took his hand in hers. “Max,” she said. “Tell me if I’m being to forward…I don’t know how to act around you.”

“Act how you are now,” he said. “Yourself. Do what you want.”

“Thank you,” she said. “For loving me.”

He kissed the top of her head. “Thank you.” He rapped his spare arm around her and pulled her closer. All he wanted to do was kiss her again. Being this close to her was moving him largely. He was a twenty-two, year old guy after all. He let go of her hand and put his index finger under her chin, pushing her to look up at him. Her eyes were glossy.

Slowly, but certainly, he lowered his mouth to hers and kissed her as a man in love would. He opened her mouth with his tongue and started his first real exploration of the girl that would make his future. He opened himself up to her like she was for him and together they held on tight preparing themselves for the ride of their lives.

When they broke away, he spoke. “Start from when I left and don’t stop until you reach this morning.”

She smiled. “Well after you left I…”

Chapter Fifteen.

Liz danced around her dorm room singing along with the music on her stereo that she had brought from home. She was so cheerful. She couldn’t remember ever being in such high spirits.

She was so happy that she had no room for any other emotion to seep through. She had a wonderful, ideal, affectionate, defensive, gorgeous boyfriend who would be there for her through the rough patches in her life. She treasured him, he loved her, and they were together, together evermore.

There was a knock on the door interrupting her dancing and she quickly turned down her music and went to answer it. A short girl with black hair and glasses stood in the doorway clutching her open book to her chest. She wore a white blouse with a black cardigan over top and kilt on her hips.

“Excuse me,” she said in English but with a strongly accented voice. “You may not need to be studying, but some of us are trying to and find it very hard to find our muse when their favorite band is being blasted in the next room. Can you please turn it down?”

“Your favorite band?” Liz asked. “They’re mine too. Why don’t you come over here, I was about to have lunch. I’ll facilitate you in your study.”

The girl frowned, obviously shocked by Liz’s sociability. She was in too good a frame of mind and couldn’t help but let it shine through onto the world.

The girl looked conflicted, then sighed, and gave in. “Yeah sure, I’ve been dying for a break. How good are you at Biology?”

“That’s my finest subject, you’re in luck,” Liz said. She held the door open for the girl to walk through. “So, what’s your name?”

And that’s how Liz became good friends with Dasha Chernenko from Novgorod, Russia.



Liz walked into Max’s dorm room with poise. She had only been to see him here three times but yet she felt more at ease here then in her own room.

Max was sitting at his desk typing on his laptop and wasted no time swirling around to see her. “Hi,” he said.

She lay down on his bed and propped herself up on her elbows. “You haven’t had a break in hours have you?” She asked.

He glanced back at his computer and yawned. “I’m making progress,” he argued.

She patted the bed beside her. “Come here,” she said. “Come have a break.”

Max got up, walked over, and took a seat beside her.

“Come out with me,” she said quietly. “You’ve been working too hard and I’ve barely had a chance to see you. Even genius’s need breaks you know. I saw this great kebab place…”

Max sighed. “I wish I could Liz but I have to…” She put her finger to his lips.

“You’re twenty-two years old, nearly twenty-three. You can’t waste your early twenties cooped up in here. You have to have some fun.” She looked into his eyes, trying to get him to understand her seriousness. “Work can wait.”

“Can it?” He asked. “I know I’m being a nuisance but really I’m doing this so later on I will have more time. Can you wait just a couple more weeks?”

She took his face in her hands and ran her finger around the outline of his lips. “You have to get some fresh air, its unhealthy staying in doors.” she said.

“I’ll sit by the window,” he said.

“What about the fifteen-to-twenty minutes of sunlight that you are supposed to get each day to fulfill the Vitamin E requirement to have a healthy lifestyle?”

Max’s brow creased. She had him there

She laughed. “See? You have to get out. Come and have lunch with me.”

They were silent for a moment before she leaned up and pressed her lips to his.

As she knew he would, he opened his mouth to her, brushing and pushing his tongue against hers. His hands found their way into her sleek hair and ran through it, weaving and stroking.

After he didn’t pull away Liz wrapped her fingers around his forearms and tugged him downwards. He slowly drifted towards her and when he saw what she wanted him to do, he got up onto his knees’ and gently lay down on top of her, never breaking the kiss.

Liz rapped her arms around his neck and slipped her legs apart so he could rest comfortably between them. She had never been kissed like this before and he was doing things to her that she had wondered for a long time if she would ever get to experience. Her pulse thumped under her skin, so loud she wondered if he could hear it in his ears.

He was yet to tell her off his experience at this…but to Liz it seemed he had had plenty practice. How else could he touch her so wonderfully? As if he knew exactly how to excite her senses.

Breaking away from her mouth, Max disappointed Liz. She was about to tell him to continue his sweet torture when, as if he knew, his insistent, sensual, exciting mouth returned, this time to have a feast on her neck. His wet tongue felt surprisingly thrilling against her warm skin, who knew such a diminutive act could fire forth such passion.

Her head rolled back and a moan escaped her lips. Please God, she wanted to pray, don’t ever let him stop. She didn’t know if it were appropriate to pray for such a thing but couldn’t help thinking it nevertheless. Her hands clutched at his shirt, bunching it under her finger tips, creasing it and stretching it.

Max was worried that what he was doing was going to startle her. He was hesitant to do anything that would set her off into a nervous attack of paranoia. She was acting so strong compared to two months ago when she had appeared so feeble and delicate but still he never knew, would she be afraid of him being disrespectful?

He loved her, he could be patient. But only if she sought that of him, if she was prepared, he would keep on with pleasure. He ran his hands up her hips, appreciating what she had been given at birth. She was so small, so soft under his fingers, how could he ever do her justice?

She arched into his lower anatomy, surprised to find it enlarged by arousal of his current choice of commotion. She couldn’t believe she had played a part in causing such a reaction; it thrilled her and made her feel superior.

They were pulled from their activity abruptly when the door to the dorm room banged open. In walked a man carrying a guitar case and a big grayish bag with tags and bandanas sewn to it. When Liz got a good look at his face she saw that he had a large clump of hair on his head that covered most of his forehead and eyes. His cheeks and chin were covered with stubble and his chiseled, manly features were topped off with bright blue sparkling eyes. His clothes were dark and raggedy, with baggy khaki pants and, what could only be described as an old army jacket.

He laughed whole heartedly when he discovered Max and Liz on the bed. “Max Evans, do my eyes deceive me, or have you found yourself some honey?”

Max gently climbed off Liz and helped her up to a sitting position. “Timothy!” He said to the intruder. “I was beginning to wonder if you’d ever come back.”

“Don’t call me that, I hate that, I hate that, I hate that,” Tim said laughing. “And I’ll always come back. It’s great to see you man. Do you want me to come back later?” He winked at Liz.

“We were just leaving,” she said shyly.

“Oh, maybe my eyes were failing me after all,” he said.

“Liz, this is Raymond my roommate. Timothy this is Liz, the newest, best contribution to my life.” Max got up off the bed and straightened out his clothing.

“Wouldn’t we all say that if we were lucky enough to find ourselves making out with a beautiful girl in the middle of the day?” Tim said. He bowed to Liz. “How do you do, milady?”

Liz blushed. “It’s nice to meet you,” she said.

Tim walked over to the door on the other side of the room and walked through it to the other bedroom. He dumped his guitar and bag down, pulled off his jacket and fell back onto his bed. “Argh,” he groaned. “Still feels like shit, how I left it.”

Max helped Liz up off the bed. “Tim, we’ll leave you alone to pack. We’re going to go get some kebabs for lunch. Want us to bring you back something?” He asked.

“Oh Max you doll, thank you but I already ate and I think I may just sleep for the next twenty-four hours. Have fun, live the life I so fruitfully gave up.” He kicked off his big boots only to reveal his gray holey socks.

“Okay, see you man,” Max said. He pulled on his coat and took Liz’s hand. “Let’s go,” he whispered to her. She nodded and together they left the building to enjoy the sunny day.

During lunch Max brought up what had been bothering him. “Liz, what happened in there…tell me if you ever don’t want any of that—“

Liz cut him off. “Stop right there before you embarrass me so badly you’ll never hear from me again,” she said. “Max, did I at any time pull away? You’re right, it is hard for me to be fully there because of what happened but that’s what I love about being with you, I know you’ll ease me into a comfortable place for both of us. Don’t worry so much, if at any point I don’t want to continue I’ll let you know.”

“I just don’t want you to be scared of me,” Max said taking her hand.

“I’m not scared of you,” she said. “I would find it very hard to be.”

He looked down at their hands. “I love you,” he said. “I’m so much happier when I’m with you.”

“Good, so what we feel is mutual,” she leaned over the table and kissed his lips simply. “We’re still so knew, but I’m comfortable with you. Like I’ve always known you even if you weren’t there.”

Max smiled. “That’s what makes us special,” he said.



The cold wind nipped at her legs as she walked along. She clutched her big jacket to her chest and frantically tried to keep her scarf from flying away as it thrashed back and forth. She knew that if she didn’t hurry she would get caught in the rain but her legs were moving as swiftly as they could.

For the fifth time she turned to look behind her, the chilly feeling like someone was following her slithered up her spine.

“Calm down,” she whispered trying to compose herself. The wind whisked her words out over the large lake, propelling them into oblivion, never to be seen again. She was just being paranoid, it had been nearly six months since her assault but she still felt troubled going out on her own. This was a public place; nothing could happen to her here. Right?

The tree’s above her head creaked and howled as they bent unusually to escape the harsh rage of the blustery weather. The weak leaves clutching the branches for their life lost their grip and were torn away and blown around her. Stray rubbish whistled and munched as it crashed into park benches and cars.

Liz took several deep breaths, not daring to shut her eyes for that would give someone a chance to creep up on her. She looked to her left, her right and bit her lip. “Just stoppit!!” She told herself. She felt as if she was letting her assailant haunt her again. He was stalking her and waiting till she was weak and alone so he could advance on her again. He was always one step ahead, one breath ahead, and one heart beat ahead…

Well she was not going to let him get her again. He would not silently torment her again; she was strong, constant and unwavering and she would not be defeated.

She stopped walking, clenched her small hands, and closed her eyes. “Here I am, come and get me. Come on, I’m waiting!” She cried. It took a lot of her resolve to be able to say that. Every time she would do something that made her feel powerful she would store it for the next time she had to be courageous. The pile she had made was quickly diminishing. “Huh!” She said opening her eyes again. “That’s what I thought.”

She was about to start walking again when she saw a movement out of the corner of her eye. Her heart clogged up and a sickly puke feeling molested her chest. She turned to investigate but saw no one. She twisted around to face the way she had just come and saw no one. Who else was as silly as her to be exposed to this weather? She heard the pile of leaves behind her crunch and spun around.

A loud shriek erupted from her and she leapt what felt like ten feet into the air.

“Oh!” The person said. “I’m sorry; I didn’t mean to frighten you.”

“Like hell you didn’t!” She blubbered holding her hand over her storage place. She checked deep within her, yip her saved up valor was long gone. The loud thumping of the drum in her head slowly subsided so it was only a small tap, tap, tap.

She apologized to the male in front of her. She had seen him before; he was in one of her classes…what was his name again? She had no idea.

Calculus, he was in her Calc class.

“What did you want?” She asked.

He couldn’t keep his feet still, he kept squirming. “Do you remember me?” He asked.

“Yeah, you’re in my Calc class,” she said shivering. “It’s really cold, I have to get to—“

“I know the weathers terrible for this time of the year. I was just wondering if you wanted to get…uh coffee or something to eat sometime.”

Liz looked closely at the guy. His name was Raymond, she remembered now. He had sat next to her in her very first class. She hated having to reject people. “I’m sorry…” she said. “I’m already seeing someone.”

“Oh,” he said his eyes filling with something indecipherable. “Okay then, sorry for keeping you.”

He began to walk away and she called out to him. “Raymond I’m sorry!”

He turned his head and smiled at her then went on his way.

Liz ran to her class, she couldn’t have been happier to be surrounded by people again. Throughout the period she thought about her walk there. She was sure someone had been following her, in fact she was convinced there had been. She had felt some ones presence.

A shiver sent her body into a tiny convulse, which gained her an odd look from the girl sitting next to her. Liz grew irritated with the girl; maybe she should try walking along the haunted footpath and then see how she felt.

When the class was finished Liz heaved her coat back on and geared up for the bloodcurdling hike back. So she was being excessive, but only a little bit. Outside the door she was overjoyed to find Max waiting for her. He smiled when he saw her and she ran her hand through her hair in hopes to tidy it up a little bit. Her knight in shining armor here to save her from the hazardous, life threatening walk back.

“Hi,” she said approaching him. “What are you doing here?”

“What I need an excuse to come see you?” He asked, still smiling.

“Of course not,” she replied. “Is it raining?”

“Not yet,” he said.

“I was going to come and see you now,” she said. “It’s very nice to see you out of your room.”

He took her hand and they started walking down the hall. “Let’s go see a movie,” he said.

“I would love to,” she said. When she saw that he was heading towards the ghostly lane she shyly told him of what happened and how she was never going to walk this way again.

Max looked concerned. “Do you want to go the long way?” He asked. The wind was blowing stronger now and he had to speak loudly so she could hear.

“No,” she replied moving closer to him. “You’re with me now. I’m safe.”

[nicola]

Chapter Sixteen

Liz fell back onto her bed and swayed her head from side to side. “Maria, Maria, Maria, is it always this good?” She asked.

Maria liked seeing her friend in high spirits. “Depends on what you’re referring to,” she said propping her head up on her elbow.

Liz turned her head so she was facing her companion. “You always used to come over to my house after your dates and I’d listen while you described every little detail of the evening, remember? I used to say it sounded wonderful but I had no idea. I always believed there is one person for everyone and I wanted to wait.”

“Are you glad you did?” Maria asked.

“Oh Maria, I am SO relieved I did. Max he’s just…I can’t describe him; He’s perfect. When I’m with him he makes me forget about everything that happened. And he’s gorgeous! Don’t you think he’s just the most handsome guy you’ve ever met? I could just stare at him forever.”

Maria chuckled, “As your parent’s would say: he’s just what the doctor ordered.”

“Yes!” Liz said. Her face fell, “If they were okay with me dating him that is. They just can’t seem to get past the fact he was in jail. It doesn’t seem to matter that it was for something he didn’t do.”

“Don’t worry, they’ll come around. I was a little hazy about believing it at first too but now that I see how happy he makes you I couldn’t be more pleased for you.” Randomly Maria suddenly spat out, “His room mate is HOT! You have to set me up with him.”

Liz cackled. “Tim?”

“Yes,” Maria said. “He is totally drool-worthy. Don’t you agree? You’d have to be blind not to see what I mean.”

Liz rolled her eyes. “I’m too preoccupied drooling over Max…but yes Tim is some what attractive.”

“Some what!” Maria chirped. “He is MEGA attractive.”

“What ever,” Liz said. “I think there is something going on with him. Don’t get me wrong he’s a nice guy it’s just some of the things he said when I first met him…he seemed like a bit of a trouble maker.”

“I bet he’s great in the sack.”

“MARIA!” Liz got up off her bed.

“Where are you going?”

“I have to go to the library to get a book. Do you want to come?” Liz pulled on her coat and hat.

“No way, I’m going to have an early night and catch up on such much needed beauty siesta!” Maria flopped back onto her pillow and yawned. “Have fun though and don’t be gone too long it’s going to be dark soon.”

“I might go see Max afterwards, see if he needs any help studying.” Liz opened the door and was about to head out when she heard Maria say:

“By helping him study you mean help him study the back of your mouth right?” She imitated him. “Oh Liz, thank you for letting me inspect your tonsils that will help me out during my exam on the human cranium.”

“I’m not hearing you, I am not hearing you,” Liz replied.

“Well at least make him walk you back here when you’re done,” Maria said.

“I will!”

Liz walked briskly to the Mugar Memorial Library. She still didn’t feel confident walking around alone and didn’t want to terrify herself again.

The spooky weather conditions didn’t help either.

Once inside the library Liz sighed in relief. She knew how weak she was being but she couldn’t help it—no matter how many self-motivation speeches she gave to herself she was still scared stiff.

“Hi,” she greeted the librarian. “I was wondering if you could point me in the direction of the place I could find science textbooks?”

“Sure, right out the back in the left corner.”

“Thank you.”

Liz was horrified to learn that no one was in the science section and her presence was obscured from the librarian. What if someone came to molest her here? They could get away with it very easily. She was definitely going to put that in the complaints box. She searched smartly hoping to get out quickly.

A few minutes later she heard footsteps behind her and spun around. “Is someone there?” She asked.

The area went quiet; the only noise that could be heard was her loud hasty breathing. After cursing herself for being so jumpy she continued on her search. She crouched down to read the labels on the bottom shelf and tried to focus. After reading it twice it still didn’t register in her mind. “For goodness sake,” she muttered. “Get a grip.”

Her hands were trembling and she shook them neurotically to make them stop. It didn’t help so she tried to ignore it, that and the thrashing in her chest. She read the label again, Physics. She was in the wrong section. Hastily she got up and walked around the shelf to the other side where she found what she was looking for.

Footsteps again. Letting out a frustrated breath she crooked her head back and glanced around, no one in sight. “Paranoid, you are being paranoid,” she mumbled.

There was a clamor behind her and she whirled around just in time to see a row of books on the shelf tumble off and a figure on the other side move swiftly away. She leapt up hastily and tried to keep from screaming. Some one just knocked it by accident, that’s all.

She walked towards the shelf. “Excuse me!” She called. “You…You tipped the—“

They were gone. How rude.

All of a sudden the shelf that she had just been at clattered and a row off books descended to her feet with a bash. She whirled around in alarm and lost her built up gallantry. She couldn’t take it any more she had to get out of here, she had to get to a place where she was enclosed by people. Slowly backing away in horror resulted in crashing into the ledge behind her and causing more books to plummet down.

She cried out in dismay and covered her face with her hands. “Just leave me alone, please! Please just leave me alone!” She sobbed. The area was silent apart from the noise of her weeping and eventually she pulled her hands away from her face and looked around. There was no one in sight. Her hands gripped the shelf behind her and she slowly turned around to face it. She closed her eyes and rested her head against the metal hoping to get a grip.

A noise on the other side of the shelf caused her to open her eyes. She gasped in shock when directly in front of her she saw a pair of shining green eyes. In a blink they were gone and she was left shuddering and convulsing in terror.

Unexpectedly loud footsteps were heard behind her. She could tell they were a woman’s high heal sandals and sure enough a woman’s voice soon followed.

“What the heck? What’s going on here?” She said.

Liz eased herself back around to face the lady and couldn’t stop the tears from falling from her eyes.

“Are you all right? What happened?”

Liz opened her mouth to say something but couldn’t bring herself to. She cried out and ended up barging past the lady and running as fast she could to Max’s dorm room where she banged on the door frantically with her fists. It swung open seconds later and she fell into Max’s arms and sobbed her heart out.

“Liz?” Max asked concerned. “What’s going on? What’s wrong?”

Liz looked up at him. “I’m just being paranoid, I have to be. He’s locked up and can’t get me but he was in the library and I swear he’s following me…I am just imagining it right? Oh God I’m going crazy. My hands are shaking.” She held her trembling hands up. “They won’t stop, normal people’s hands don’t shake…normal people can walk by themselves without being terrified, normal people can get a book out of the library without—“ She broke down again.

“Oh Liz,” Max said. “Shh, shh it’s okay. Come and sit down.”

He led her over to his bed and knelt in front of her while she sat. She cried onto his chest and he hugged her and whispered soothing words to her.

Max’s heart was beating rapidly, what had happened to her to cause her to loose it so badly he wondered? His stomach twisted in worry, back was the frail, broken Liz.

After a long time she finally calmed down and stopped crying.

She was so embarrassed by what she had just done. “I’m so sorry I just…” She just what, she wondered? She couldn’t believe she had just burst in and did that. She couldn’t believe herself.

“Liz, shh don’t apologize,” he said. He kissed her forehead. “You came to the right place, you know that. You don’t have to tell me what happened till your ready. Do you need anything? Is there anything you want?”

Her big brown eyes blinked. “Why are you being so kind to me?” She asked. “I’m just some stupid, scrawny, useless girl who is too terrified to—“

“Stop right there,” Max said cutting her off. He cupped her cheeks. “Liz what’s brought this on? It’s me. I love you, you know that. Stop saying such mad things, you’re scaring me.”

She closed her eyes. “My hands…” They were still trembling.

Max picked up her hands and kissed her fingers. “They are beautiful, like you are. And you aren’t scrawny, useless or stupid. You’re Liz, funny, smart, caring, stunning.”

He rapped his arms around her again and hugged her. She buried her face in his neck and sighed. What had she ever done to deserve this? She couldn’t understand what he saw in her, she was just a big burden.

“Do you need me to get you anything?” He asked again. “Are you hungry?”

“I’m okay,” she whispered. When she looked up she saw Tim, who had probably witnessed the whole thing, standing in the doorway of his bedroom.

“Is everything okay?” He asked apprehensively. He wasn’t sure in he should intrude on the moment or not.

“Everything’s fine,” Max said shooting him a, ‘please leave’ look.

“Okay. Well I’m going to go have dinner at the cafeteria, want me to bring you back anything?” He said.

“Have you had dinner?” Liz asked Max. He shook his head.

“Go have dinner Max, I don’t want to hold you up…” She said. She really didn’t want him to leave, she clung onto his arms.

“No I’m not leaving you,” he said.

“If you walk me back to my dorm…” Tim cut her off before she could say anymore.

“I’ll bring you back something Max,” he said. He opened the front door. “I won’t be too long.”

“Thank you,” Max said.

When he was gone Liz asked Max how his studying was going.

He looked her doubtfully. “Liz, don’t change the subject. Are you okay now?” He asked.

“I’m…okay,” she said. “I just freaked myself out at the library…I guess I’m not as over my assault as I thought I was.”

Max stood up and took a seat next to her on the bed. “You aren’t expected to be brave,” he said. “Everyone understands how hard this is on you.”

“I should be over it by now,” she said. She flopped back onto his bed and sighed. “I feel so thick.”

“You shouldn’t feel thick, you’re being realistic,” Max lay down beside her and propped his head up on his elbow. “Liz, stop tearing yourself up about this.”

After several minutes of convincing her she was now safe and that she wasn’t being weak they turned on his bedside lamp and turned off the main light. Max lay down with her, him on his back and her on her stomach. His head was propped up with pillows and Liz rested her head on his chest.

“I’m ready to tell you what happened,” she said quietly.

Max ran his fingers through her hair and listened to her tell him about the library incident. When she was finished he was frowning.

“Liz, I don’t want to frighten you more but it doesn’t sound like you were just being paranoid. Two shelves of books don’t just fall down by themselves.”

“Well what then?” Liz asked. “Are you suggesting someone did actually do it to frighten me?”

“I don’t know, I just…” he trailed off. “You know what, let’s not think about it. You’re fine now and I’ll make sure nothing happens again okay? It was probably some jerk with too much time on his hands screwing around.”

“But why me?” Liz asked. “They must have known that I would be a perfect victim, how else would they know that would freak me out so much?”

“They probably didn’t,” Max said. “They probably just saw you alone and wanted to have some fun.”

“Fun?” Liz said disgusted. “How could that possibly be fun to someone?”

“Some people are sick,” he said.

She sighed. “I guess,” she said. “Argh, now I really feel silly.”

“Don’t,” he said.

“Max, can I stay here? I don’t want to go back.”

“Stay as long as long as you want, stay forever.”

When Tim came back Liz was asleep.

“What happened to her?” he asked.

Max pulled the blankets on his bed over her and kissed her temple. He moved over to his desk to eat. “She’s had a rough past that’s all. She’ll be okay.”

“She sounded pretty freaked out”

“She’s fine,” Max snapped.

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry,” Tim said. “Night.”

“Good night,” Max said.

Liz woke up in the middle of the night and was shocked when she realized she was in a foreign place. She looked around and saw that Max had fallen asleep at his desk. She got up and went and shook him awake.

He opened and his eyes and smiled at her. “What time is it?” he asked yawning.

“I don’t know,” she said. “You’ll get a sore neck sleeping there, come and lie down with me.”

They climbed into bed together and Liz rested her head on his chest when he rapped his arm around her shoulders. They drifted off, this time together, and Liz barely had any bad dreams that night.

Chapter Seventeen

The clock beside the bed ticked loudly in the silent room as hour after hour passed. Footsteps of the students going to early classes could be heard creeping down the hallway outside and a noisy roommate walked around his bedroom while listening to rock music. Liz didn’t wake; Max didn’t wake so they slept longer into the morning with their heads pressed together.

Outside the storm that had lasted for four days still howled and wept shaking the old buildings and spraying the windows with water. The sky was a deep grey with no blue in sight and the daunting cracks and bangs it emitted repeatedly was only an indication that the tempest was far from finished.

Around 9:30 there was a strident tapping on the door and Tim, being the only one conscious, tread softly through the room to answer it. He unlocked the door and dragged it open slowly knowing the tarnished hinges would whine and squeak in complaint.

Maria stood behind the door with her raincoat on and her sopping wet hair glued to her cheeks. She flushed when she saw that Tim had answered the door, in nothing but his voluminous pants. She couldn’t help but be in awe of his well formed chest.

“Yeah?” He asked softly.

“Is—is, Liz here?” She asked.

Tim stepped back and motioned to the bed where the duo still slept soundlessly and said nothing.

Maria held her hands over her chest and smiled languorously. “They are so sweet!” She fussed.

Tim laughed quietly. “Yeah, I guess they are,” he supposed.

They shared a gaze. “She has a class at eleven-thirty,” Maria informed.

“That’s ages away,” Tim said. “Hey, I was just about to go get some brunch, want to come? Give them some solitude if you know what I mean.”

“My Lizzie is not going to have sex,” Maria said distressed. “But I’ll come with you anyway.”

“I didn’t mean that,” Tim defended himself as they walked out.

When the door closed with a slight bash Max was torn from his slumber. His eyes fluttered, trying to adjust to the daylight seeping through the windowpane, not that there was a great amount of it. He stretched his legs out and scrunched the muscle in his toes and fingers that were stiff from lack of use. He rolled his head back and loosened the tightness of his rigid neck.

Flanking his side Liz reallocated to get nearer to him and let out a drowsy sigh. Becoming conscious he remembered that he shared his slumber divan and his eyes became more vivid and his lips quirked upwards. He stared down at her face and the splendor he discovered in her countenance evoked movements within him. His rhythmic heart beat accelerated, and his breathing became hastier, she was exquisite through and through and her loveliness awed him.

When he shifted so he could observe her more plainly her eyes snapped open and her face became vexed. However, her idiom was quickly reinstated by unadulterated enchantment and she beamed up at him. Her arm that had been draped over his chest was quickly snatched back to rest at her side and she sat up leisurely.

“What time is it?” She asked herself panicking for an instant.

Max sat up shortly afterwards and planted his hand on her forearm. “It’s just after ten; do you have a class to go to?” He asked.

Liz visibly relaxed. “Yes, at Eleven-thirty,” she said. “I should get back to my room Maria will be panicked.” She didn’t know if she trusted herself to stay here in bed with Max, it seemed very intimate.

Max nodded. “I’ll walk you back,” he offered.

Liz looked adoringly into his eyes. “Thank you Max I—“

“Don’t,” he said. “It’s fine.”

She touched his cheek with her hand and after staring into each others eyes they leaned into one another and kissed tenderly. A moment of panic that she had bad breath flashed in Liz’s mind but when Max rapped his arm around her back and drew her close to him that thought diminished.

“Oh Max,” she murmured against his lips.

They ran back to her dorm room. Liz pulled her jacket on and said, “On your marks, get set, GO!” and they laughed the whole way. They were drenched when they walked into her empty room.

“I need to go have a shower,” she said. “You—“

“Do you want me to wait?” He asked. When he saw her hesitate he sat down at the end of her bed and folded his arms. “I’ll wait.”

Her face relaxed and hugged him tightly. “Thank you, thank you for being so understanding and wonderful! I don’t know how I’d cope if you weren’t here.”

“You’d cope fine Liz, because you are fine,” Max kissed her forehead. Apparently that wasn’t good enough for her because she pressed her lips to his and kissed him rightfully with all her love. The feelings of complete and utter commitment that deluged them was enough to make them lightheaded.

She started climbing on the bed following him and he crept backwards so he could recline. Liz positioned herself on top of him and pressed her forehead to his. “Can I ask you something?” She asked amid kisses.

“A-huh,” he mumbled at the same time as he kissed her neck.

“How, how far have you—you know,” she blushed. “Gone? Like before…?” She wouldn’t catch his eyes after she’d said it and was crimson in the face.

Max smiled. “Are you worried or are you just wondering?” He asked forcing her to look at him. He found her shyness delectable.

“I-I’m just wondering,” she said. “Because I have, done—nothing really.”

He kissed her lips. “I’m, waiting until marriage,” he said.

She bit her lip. “Really?”

“Really Really,” Max whispered charmingly.

She ran her hands up his arms. “Is it alright for me to admit that I’m glad?” She asked.

He laughed. “Yes, I guess it is.” They kissed long and hard and when they broke away they gasped into the cold air.

“Can you…?” She tugged at his shirt. “I want to see you.”

They removed his shirt and threw it on the floor beside them. Liz couldn’t believe her eyes, she had known his body would be wonderful but it didn’t seem realistic at all. It was the kind of thing you saw on television, not on your boyfriend. She ran her hands up his abs and kissed his collar.

Swiftly, they flipped over so Max lay on top of her and she rapped her arms around his neck. While they kissed, Max’s hands ran up and down her stomach, not sure whether he should move them higher.

Liz wanted him to, she trusted him. She repeated it over and over in her head. I trust him, I trust him…

He begun torturing her neck with his lips and she grabbed his hands and guided them up to her breasts. He looked at her surprised and she smiled and took his lips again, fiercely, fervently, fondly, and fully. Max, knowing that he was allowed to touch her, started unbuttoning her blouse, kissing her exposed skin as he went.

Her chest heaved up and down with each breath she took and her breasts brushed Max’s cheeks. He kissed along the edge of her bra and in-between them, indulging in her and devoted to her. He took several seconds to just look at her exposed to him and could barely breathe with the butterflies in his stomach.

Her thin black bra showed the outlines of her nipples and he was just about to stroke them when the door opened and Maria and Tim came in laughing. They didn’t even spot them on the bed; they just headed through to Maria’s room and closed the door behind them.

Max and Liz glanced at each other, both with frowns on their faces. “When did they—?” Max started.

“I don’t know…” Liz replied. They both looked in the direction of the door and then back at each other. “Do you think we should,” she motioned the door.

“I don’t think they’d, uh, want to be interrupted,” Max said.

She blushed. “You mean like we so rudely were?”

Max kissed her lips gently. “Yes, like we so rudely were.”

She caught a glimpse at his watch as he was stroking her hair and sighed. “Damn, I have to…I’ve got class soon. I need to go, shower…”

“Yeah,” he said. He unhurriedly shifted off her and lay down on his back beside her. “I’ll wait.”

She kissed him quickly before going over to her cupboard and grabbing a towel and a grey long-sleeved woolen dress for the day. She grabbed a change of underwear then opened the door. “I’ll be as quick as I can,” she said.

“Okay,” he said smiling at her. He pulled his long-sleeved shirt back on and reached for his jersey he had left on her dresser yesterday morning.

He lay there in silence and was horrified to learn he could hear moans coming from the next room. He buried his face in Liz’s pillow, hoping to drown them out but it didn’t help. How could he get control of his body when he could hear that going on in the next room?

He sat up and ran his hand through his hair. Images of Liz in the shower weren’t helping either…

Suddenly Maria’s door flung open and Max scrambled to put Liz’s pillow on his lap so his arousal was hidden. Maria was wearing her bra and underwear and her unbuttoned blouse hung off her shoulders. She was about to stumble across the room to get something when she spotted him and gasped.

“What are you doing here?” She asked trying desperately to cover herself.

“Liz and I were here before—“

What was he supposed to say? You interrupted Liz and I making out and now I’m left high and dry while you get some in the next room? No, he didn’t think that would go down well. “We were here first,” he simply said.

“You were, there…?” Maria’s face slowly came to realization. “Oh God. Where is Liz now?”

“Showers,” Max answered.

Tim came up behind her in nothing but his boxers. “Babe, who are you tal—Max?” He said shocked.

“Hi,” Max waved. “Don’t let me interrupt.”

“We were just, uh studying,” Maria said.

Tim snorted. “Yeah, each other.”

Max rolled his eyes. “Seriously, Liz will be back soon and we’ll leave. Just pretend I’m not here.”

“Oh yeah right,” Maria said buttoning her shirt up again.

“Wait, oh Maria!” Tim said. “Don’t just…”

“It’s over Tim, it’s not going to happen while he’s in here,” Maria said. She walked back into her room and Tim went after her, closing the door behind him. Max could hear them arguing in the next room

When Liz came back she dragged on her black jacket, scarf, and boots then pulled her hair up into a pony tale. Shooting a glance at Maria’s door, Liz asked Max if they were still in there.

“Yeah,” he replied. She smelt wonderful, her clean aroma wafted over to the bed.

Liz put her necklace on and then held her hand out for Max to take and he gladly slipped his hand into it and followed her out of the room.

“Do you have any classes today?” Liz asked.

“Yes, two this afternoon.” He kissed her neck while they waited in the elevator.

“Well, on Thursday nights Maria and I usually go to my Aunts for dinner, do you want to come? I guarantee good food,” she said.

“How could I say no to that?” He asked. They stopped at the canteen and brought some breakfast provisions to eat on their way to her class. The rain had let up but it was still spitting so they tried to stay under the sheltered parts of the buildings while they walked.

When they arrived at the building and were saying goodbye Max kissed her and said, “I’m sorry I can’t come and get you from here afterwards I’ll just be getting into my class then. Will you be okay? If your not, get Maria to come get you…I don’t want you getting hurt.”

“I’ll be fine,” she said. “Thank you for taking such good care of me.”

“Everyone takes good care of the things they love,” he said. She smiled and kissed him once more before hurrying through the door.



“Yes, I know, Max told me,” Liz said. “So, just how did you end up in there with him to begin with?”

“Well we had breakfast together and one thing lead to another…” Maria trailed off. “I’m actually kind of glad we were stopped now. It’s not like me to just got jump into the sack with someone I barely know.”

“What are you talking about?” Liz asked. “It’s very like you.”

“Liz!” Maria said suddenly very flushed. “Leave me alone!”

She laughed merrily under her hooded head. “Okay, okay, that was mean of me I’m sorry.”

“So where the heck is Max?” Maria asked. “I thought you told him to meet us here at 5:30? That was ten minutes ago.”

“I know,” Liz said frowning. “He must have been held up or something.”

“Typical male,” Maria muttered. “Speaking of Max though, he looked mighty rosy sitting on your bed this morning. What had you two been up too before we interrupted you?”

Liz blushed. “Nothing,” she retorted.

“He’s your boyfriend, you don’t have to be embarrassed,” Maria reminded her. “So?”

“We were just, making out…a little,” Liz said. “That’s it, nothing more to say. Now shhh, here he comes.”

“About bloody time,” Maria mumbled. “Here we come Aunt Edna!”

Chapter Eighteen

“So how did you to meet?” Aunt Edna nibbled at her chicken bone while firing questions in Max’s direction.

Liz glanced at Max across the table and hoped he wouldn’t tell the truth. Luckily, because he was the perfect boyfriend, he responded wonderfully. “We met while I was in Albuquerque…on holiday with my best friend.”

“Really?” Aunt Edna raised an eye brow.

“Yes,” Max said. “And my best friend just left two months ago for Africa to study in a remote part of the rainforest. A group of twenty students from our university were chosen to go.”

“What’s he like?” Maria asked.

Liz rolled her eyes. “Didn’t you get enough of Tim?” She whispered.

“Hell no,” Maria whispered back.

“Well, why did you not go to Africa with him?” Aunt Edna asked.

Uncle Herby clicked his false teeth back and forth. “I went to Africa once.”

“That’s nice,” Max said.

“I was a handsome boy then—“

“That’s a long story,” Liz cut him off. “We really don’t need to hear it tonight Uncle, maybe another time? We have to be going soon and I’d hate to put Max through the suspension of having to wait until he saw you again to hear the rest.”

Uncle Herby smiled. “Smart Lizzie, that’s my niece.”

“I didn’t go because I wasn’t in his class,” Max explained.

“Oh,” Aunt Edna said.

After dinner when Max was waiting outside for Maria and Liz to come out, Uncle Herby sauntered right up to him and looked him in the eye. “You better be good to her,” he said. “I know what you college boys want and she’s been through some things and doesn’t need anybody making things worse for her.”

Max swallowed. “I know, I completely agree. I promise to be nothing but a prefect gentleman.”

He clicked his teeth then let out a low cackle. “Good, good. I trust you.”

“What are you two talking about?” Liz asked coming out the front door.

“Nothing Lizzie,” Uncle Herby said. He kissed her cheek, “You be a good girl okay?”

“I will,” Liz said. “As always. See you later, thanks for the brownies Aunt Edna!”

“That’s okay darling, see you next week.”

Back on campus the three walked together towards their dorms. “I think they liked you,” Maria said blinking at Liz.

Max frowned. “You really think so? I was under the impression if I made one wrong move they’d bite my head off.”

Liz shook her head. “No, they really are harmless; they just do that to feel in charge.”

Once they reached the building where Max would part from them Liz said to Maria, “I’ll be up in a minute.”

“Okay Ria, don’t stay out too late on a school night,” she imitated Uncle Herby.

Liz rolled her eyes.

When they were alone an uncomfortable silence fell over them. “So…” Max started.

Liz lurched at him and kissed him passionately on the lips. When she broke away he was still in a daze.

“What—?”

“Thank you for being so wonderful tonight; it was just the right thing to say when they asked how we’d met. The last thing I need is to have them frowning on us like my parents. They may be silly but they mean a lot to me and I want them to love you as much as I do…maybe not as much as I do but—“

Max broke her off by kissing her lips again. This time they molded together bit by bit, allowing themselves more time to relish in the wonderful feelings cursing through them. Tingling blasted through their bodies from the tips of their hair to the tips of their toes and as lips collided, brushing, stroking, caressing, fondling, they found their embrace tightening and the air around them heating up. Max brought his arm up around her back and pulled her closer, needing and thirsty for more of her.

He was beginning to see that she did not want him to prevent this from getting out of hand. They were both waiting for marriage to take that final step but that did not mean they could not do everything else. At first he had been troubled that he would alarm her with his hormones but it seemed to him that he was not the only one longing.

Just as things started to heat up further, with hands grasping, prying and snooping they were broken apart by someone calling out:

“Excuse me; this is not the place to be—Max and Liz?”

Professor Heart was very distressed to have broken up two of his preferred pupils. He had been exceedingly taken aback to find them is such a fervent embrace, both of them had not come across as the type of people to grope one another in public.

“Professor Heart,” Liz said flabbergasted.

“Rick!” Max was equally astounded. They swiftly stepped apart and checked their appearance.

“Good Evening Max, Liz,” Professor Heart was trying not to express his amusement at the alarm on their faces. “I was just leaving for the day, thought I’d walk and enjoy being outside without the downpour saturating me. I’ll just be on my way now… I’m sorry for, interrupting you.”

Liz let out a relieved breath when he was gone. She clenched her hands so tight her nails dug into her palms.

Max laughed. She was surprised by his ease but then realized there really wasn’t that much need to be discomfited. She’d just never feel the same around her favorite professor anymore.

“Max,” she said.

He stopped laughing. “Hmm?” He stepped closer to her again.

“Can I come back to your dorm?”

Max thought he’d misheard her, how could she possibly be asking him that? He must have been fantasizing. “Huh?” Just to make sure.

“Well we can’t very well stay here,” she said. He could see her eyes twinkling with stimulation and could see she was unsure if what she was asking was apt. Was it ever! Max grabbed her and kissed her again lightly on the lips.

Quietly he whispered, “Let’s go.”

“Wait,” Liz bit her lip. “Can I stay over…I—“

“Of course,” he replied before she finished. He couldn’t keep his feet still with the anticipation sparkling inside of him.

“I need to go up and get a few things; will you wait, two minutes? I’ll hurry.”

“Go,” he said. He leaned against the brick building with his hands in his pockets as he waited. The stars were glistening above him in the sky, the crickets were chirping to his left and right but all he could think was Liz. Her voice, her grace, her smell, they were rapidly becoming his much loved things. As if it were feasible, he felt he was falling in love with her over again. Only this time he could pursue it liberally.

Upstairs in her dorm Liz was being lectured by Maria. “Are you sure this is smart? Liz I know you still have your nightmares and…”

“I know what I’m doing, I feel safe with him Maria, I feel SO safe that I trust him to take care of me.” Liz shoved her toothbrush and change of clothing for tomorrow in a small bag. “I’ll see you in the morning; do you want me to say hi to Tim for you?”

“No,” Maria said. “Just be careful will you?”

“That’s what I’m doing,” Liz replied. She ran down the stairs to meet Max and they walked briskly to his dorm room, close together so their arms bumped with each swing.

When they got inside the door Liz threw her bag down and they hurled onto each other, continuing their earlier bustle. They didn’t bother turning on the lights, they just removed their jackets from one another and kicked off their shoes before falling back onto the bed and crawling under the covers. Liz lay under Max, running her hands up and down his chest and back while he kissed her mouth, her jaw, her neck, her ears…

“Max,” she whispered. “Where’s Tim?”

He paused. “Why?”

“Well,” Liz replied hoping he wouldn’t see her crimson face in the dark. “I don’t want him to interrupt…”

“Oh,” he mumbled. He tucked her hair behind her ears. “Do you want me to check?”

“Could you?”

She felt the loss of his body against hers as he strode across the room in the dim light. Only slightly she could see his silhouette against the wall reaching for the light switch. They both had to adjust their eyes to the new light as it flooded on.

Max knocked gently on Tim’s door and then eased it open and peaked inside. “Tim?”

He got no reply. Liz asked him if he was in there.

“He’s asleep,” Max answered. When he turned the light off and came and climbed into the bed again Liz felt her heart speed up. What was she getting herself into? Was she ready? His warm body covered hers like it had never left and she smiled, she was ready. She kissed his lips and then pressed her forehead against his. “Will you take your shirt off?” She asked.

“Y-Yeah,” he replied. He sat up, straddling her hips slightly and pulled his jersey and t-shirt over his head.

Liz sucked in a deep breath when she felt his hands return to her body they came up under her shirt to feel the smooth skin of her stomach. She wanted him to move them higher but before she could guide them there he tugged her shirt over her head.

“Hmm Max…” she moaned. His lips kissed her collar bone and moved lower sucking and nipping at the skin between her breasts. Neither of them knew how far they would allow this to go but they had no power to stop it at the moment.

Liz’s hands ran up his muscled back, grasping and clawing at his flesh while Max tortured her with his lips. He had the most sensuous, breathtaking, pleasuring mouth that set alight her insides.

One of his powerful thighs was trapped between her small feminine legs and their feet were entangled under the sheets. Liz could hear him panting into the air and felt his arousal against her lower belly, probing her gently.

Suddenly, an image of her assailant above her flashed into her mind. His greedy hands clutching at her and his pecker throbbing against her. She tried to force the thoughts away, this was Max, Max…right he would never hurt her. She wanted this with him, right, she did.

Max paused, as if sensing something was wrong. “Liz, sweetheart?” He brought his face back up to hers where he placed a soft kiss on her lips. “Is everything okay? Do you want me to stop?”

She didn’t know what she wanted anymore. She bit her lip.

Max stared at her face in the dark, from what he could see she looked distraught. Gradually he got off her and lay down adjacent to her. “I’ll stop, it’s okay…” he reached over to the side of the bed and switched on his lamp.

“I’m sorry,” Liz said. “I don’t know what came over me I just all of a sudden…”

“It’s okay Liz, I understand,” he replied. He swallowed; he needed to calm his body down now!

Liz rolled over and buried her face in his pillow. “This is so embarrassing! Oh my God!” Her hands clenched at his blankets. “I can’t even bear it…”

“No, no, no,” Max said. “Hey, it’s me, why would you be embarrassed?” He rapped his arms around her and forced her to look at him. She had tears in her eyes. “Liz, don’t be upset, I expected this I didn’t think you’d want to even touch me in the slightest way but you are so much braver then I anticipated. I’m sorry I frightened you.”

“You didn’t, frighten me,” Liz whispered. “I just remembered something from the…”

“You don’t have to tell me anything.”

“I’m sorry,” she repeated.

“Don’t be sorry,” Max said. “It’s okay. Just as long as you let me hold you for the rest of the night?”

Liz buried her face in his neck and rapped her arms around his body.

“I’ll never hurt you, you kno—

“No!” Liz cried. “This has nothing to do with you, I trust you completely. Please don’t think that.”

“I just wanted to make sure you knew,” he said. “Did you want to get changed?”

“Yes.”

“I’ll wait outside the door while you do okay?” He got up off the bed and looked around for his shirt. When he found it he pulled it on and then stood up. “Take as long as you need.”

She changed quickly into a nightgown so he wouldn’t have to wait long and then opened the door and let him back in. She wouldn’t look him in the eye, she was so mortified!

“I have to do some studying,” Max informed her. “Do you want to sleep?”

“I want to help,” Liz said. This evening had very quickly changed from what Max had expected but he would do his best to not show his disappointment. Liz was worth it all, one look at her and his conviction of that was backed up.

Chapter Nineteen

Making sure she had her shampoo and conditioner, Liz headed towards the showers at eight in the morning. It was a Wednesday and she had her first class at eleven so she had an abundance of time to get dressed.

The bathroom was empty so she quickly slipped off her pajamas and closed the stall door behind her. The water wasn’t hot, it was only lukewarm which made Liz wish she hadn’t decided to sleep in and got up to have a shower earlier when there was hot water.

She lathered her hair with shampoo straight away, hoping to get out of the shower quickly and while it was rinsing she scrubbed her stomach and thighs with her soap. Outside there were footsteps and she paused her movements. “Is someone there?” She called.

When no one answered she continued cleaning herself scrupulously. She washed her face, her back, her feet, and when she finally finished she turned off the water and dried herself with her towel. Lastly she pulled on her underwear, pants, bra, shirt, and sweater and packed up her things. She heard footsteps as she wound her hair up into the towel and frowned to herself. Again she called, “is someone out there?”

There was no reply but the door to the bathroom slapped making Liz jump. She grabbed her bag of things and kicked the shower door open with her foot. Warily she crept out into the steamy room and looked around. There was no one there.

With a sigh she headed towards the mirrors to brush her hair. She stopped dead at the sight before her and feeling a flood of fear drown her she let out a blood-curdling piercing scream.



“That’s it!” Max said resignedly. “I’m calling the cops.”

Liz held her head in her hands. “Why would someone do this to me? What kind of a twisted—“

“Don’t think about it.” Max put his hand on her shoulder and caressed her skin through her top. “Are you going to be okay?”

“Yes,” she replied. “I’m just so sick of this! I just want to go one with life!” She stood up. “I’m going to stay at my Aunts. I’m not going to stick around and let him, whoever they are, get the satisfaction from doing this to me. Will you drive me?”

“Of course,” Max said. “What about your class, are you going to go?”

Liz’s face fell. “Rah, I forgot, I better go if I want to keep up.”

The dorm room banged open and Maria flew in. “What happened?” She demanded. “Lizzie, are you alright?”

Liz wiped her eyes. “Yeah I’m okay, now,” she answered getting up to hug her friend.

“What did they do this time?” Maria asked. This was the fourth time Liz’s stalker had done something to scare her. When Maria found out whom it was she would personally like to kick their ass, she hated seeing Liz being put through extra pressure that she most definitely did not need.

Max pulled her aside and told her, “They wrote on the mirror while she was on the shower.”

Maria frowned. “What did they write?”

Max hesitantly said, “I remember the way you felt.”

“Sick!” Maria cried. “We have to call the cops this time.”

“That’s what I said,” Max agreed. “I’m going to while she’s at her next class.”

They both glanced at Liz who was sitting on the bed rubbing her red eyes. She looked up at them and smiled weakly.

“I’ll walk you?” Max asked squatting in front of her. When she nodded, he wrapped his arms around her and held her in a warm embrace. “Don’t be afraid,” he whispered. “I won’t let anything happen to you.”

“I know,” she mumbled back. She looked up at Maria. “Will you call my Aunt and Uncle and tell them I want to come and stay with them for a little while?”

“Of course,” Maria said. “In fact, I’ll come stay with you.”

When Liz got to her class she stared blankly at her professor for the entire time. She knew that the person following her wasn’t the man who had attacked her last year but yet it still frightened her. She constantly scolded herself for being such so emotionally feeble but the fear that the person stalking her wanted to physically hurt her was dreadfully strong. Whoever it was hadn’t tried to touch her so far, but that didn’t mean they wouldn’t try sooner or later.

Looking down at her hands she realized they were trembling with the effort to keep it together. She had a quaver in her manifestation that on no account used to be there. More then everything else she missed being carefree, the look of being carefree. She missed feeling out of harm's way, happy, stable. Everything remotely entertaining she did nowadays was clouded by unease. Never being able to relax was physically and emotionally exhausting.

She needed to find a way to make herself feel sturdy and at ease again. After thinking hard on it for numerous minutes at 12:17pm Liz Parker decided on what she should do.

She had to keep everything away: She had to become void of emotion unless it was completely necessary. She had to become invulnerable, untouchable, and impervious. Keep everything out, feeling out, emotion out, sentiment out, sensation out, out, out, out, until the end.

All except love. Keep that in. Max, keep you in.



“I don’t know what you want me to tell you officer,” Liz said, using her new well-built, dominant, under control manner. “I’ve explained to you what’s been happening; I’ve told you all I know. I’ve told you what I’ve seen of the person but you’re still asking me questions. Are you trying to make me remember things I want to forget?”

“Of course not Miss Parker, I’m just trying to get a complete understanding of the situation. I’ll be going now, I promise you we’ll catch the person who is causing you suffering.”

“Thank you.” Liz said. “And I’m not that distressed over it. I just find it a bother you know? Thank you for coming.” She closed the door after him and sucked in a breath. Who was she trying to kid? Did he believe her strength? She would have to work on that.

She felt arms wrap around her waist and smiled to herself. “Are you okay? How’d it go?”

Tilting her head back she kissed his lips. “It went fine, as I knew it would. They’ll find whoever it is, case closed. Life goes on.” She caught his eyes. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?” She smiled brighter. “I love you.”

“I love you,” he said. They kissed softly once again. “Let’s go watch a movie?”

“Okay, what time are you going to go back to your dorm?” She clutched his hands in hers and spun out of his arms.

“When the movies finished,” he replied grinning adorably.

Aunt Edna and Maria appeared in the doorway. “Liz, darling, bumble bee,” Edna said. “Can I talk to you for a moment please?”

Liz frowned. By the dim light in her Aunts eyes she could tell she wanted to have a solemn conversation. Liz wanted to stay away from anything that wasn’t blithe. “Max and I were just going to go watch a—” She tried to get out of it.

“Please? I’ll only be a minute,” Edna alleged. Liz nodded and mumbled okay. She shot Max a look that said, ‘forgive me? I’ll be right back’.

He smiled. “I’ll go warm up the couch.”

Liz followed her Aunt through to the master bedroom. It was Herby and Edna’s space and it smelt like sandalwood and Japanese spices. It was ornamented with old tacky seventies-style décor but was cozy.

Liz was sleeping in her cousins, Edna’s eldest daughter, bedroom. Since she was now twenty-eight she didn’t need the room anymore.

Edna sat down on the side of the bed and patted the space beside her. “Come here bumblebee.”

After she was sitting Edna put her hand on Liz’s knee. “Are you okay darling?”

“I’m fine,” Liz answered smiling.

Edna swallowed. “Truthfully? You don’t have to be embarrassed with me. You used to run around my lawn nakey with my Thomas, do you remember that?”

Liz laughed. “No I don’t, but Thomas is four years older then me. That’s a bit pervey really.”

“Yes, I suppose,” Edna said. “So, as I was saying, you don’t have to hide what you really feel from me.”

Lies till the end. Liz chanted in her mind. Keep everything out. “I’m not hiding anything! I’m fine, I really am. I am happy, I have an amazing boyfriend, and I’m sharing a dorm room with my best friend. The science department at school is wonderful…” Maybe she could convince herself while she was convincing her aunt.

“I was thinking, and Maria agrees with me, that you should give therapy ago again.” Edna tried to say it as nicely as possible. “We just want you to be happy and back to your old self.”

“I’m not going to therapy.” Liz stood up. “I told you I’m fine, thank you for your concern but look at me, look closely, I am fine, I am happy and I don’t need to be reminded of what happened to me every two minutes.”

“Liz—“

“I’m done talking to about this, okay? You guys are sweet for worrying, but it’s my life and I’m fine. I’m not going to let that man ruin my life. I’ve moved on, you need to as well. Please don’t keep reminding me because that doesn’t help me. If I need something I’ll do it, I can look after myself, contrary to what you all think of me. I won’t break. Now, stop, please.” Liz walked out of the room, feeling proud of herself. Why did this just have to be a façade she was putting up? She really could feel like this. Everything she just said she agreed with, it didn’t have to be a lie.

She went and joined Max in the lounge. “What are we watching?” she asked.

He was lying on his back with his hands behind his head. “I don’t know, why don’t you pick?” he asked.

Liz walked over to the video cabinet and looked through the selection. “Max I don’t think you’re going to like what’s in here,” she said.

“Just get something with a little bit of action.”

Liz laughed. “Typical.”

Once she put a movie in she went back and lay down on the couch with her head on Max’s chest. “You know what Aunt Edna wanted to talk to me about?” Liz asked.

“What?”

“She thinks I should try therapy again,” Liz answered.

“Yeah?” Max looked down at her. “And?”

“I’m not going to, I don’t need it,” she told him. “I’m fine; you think I am don’t you?

Max kissed the top of her head. “You don’t have to go to therapy if you don’t think you need to. It’s not something anyone can make you do.”

“Thank you,” she sighed.

ààààààààà

“Oh, someone’s dressed up.”

Liz walked into Max’s dorm only to find Tim sitting playing his guitar on the couch.

“Yeah,” she said. “I’m going to have dinner at Max’s parent’s house. Where is he? He’s supposed to be here.”

“He’s just gone down to the bathroom. He’ll be back soon.” Tim strummed his guitar. “Do you know how to play?” He asked.

“No, I’ve never tried,” she replied.

“Well come here, have a go. You never know you might have a natural talent.”

Liz glanced at the door then back at Tim. Max might take a while…

What the hell, she thought.

“Okay, sure.” She sat down on the couch next to Tim and he handed his guitar over. He held her arms to put them in the right place. “Yeah, just like that…don’t look so stiff, be comfortable.”

Liz watched as Tim held her hand to the strings to show her what the different cords were. “Now run your other hand down the wires at that end…yeah, yeah that’s it see you’re a natural.”

She smiled. “You think?” She strummed it again.

“Sure in a few years you’ll be the best the worlds seen,” Tim said with a chuckle. Liz giggled with him.

The door opened as she tried again and Max strolled in. He saw them on the couch together and stopped.

“Hey Max,” Liz said. “Tim was just teaching me how to play the guitar. Are you ready to go?”

He nodded. “Yeah I am,” he said. “When did you get here?”

“About,” Tim looked at his watch. “Two minutes ago.”

“Oh.”

Liz got up and handed the guitar back to Tim. “Thanks,” she said. Walking over to Max she placed a gentle kiss on his lips. “

“You look stunning,” he said. She blushed. He took her hands in his. “Let’s go?”

She nodded. “Okay.”

[nicola]

Chapter Twenty

Looking out on the lake, Max took pleasure in being able to sit outside with the sun on his face for the first time in a week. The hurricane was gone and the hot weather was back so he could finally be outside and truly take pleasure in it. He was wearing a grey t-shirt and thin black pants, no sweaters, no long sleeved shirts.

He sighed. God it felt good to feel the warmth on his arms.

Being locked up in prison made him appreciate sitting here a lot more then he would have earlier last year.

On his watch the time read 3:30pm, he had no where to go and no one to see—he could just sit. He could think about anything he wanted and do whatever he wanted. He was a free-man on the verge of drowning in life. No longer could he be a child, he was a man now, with genuine problems, responsibilities, and concerns.

It seemed to him that being locked up had changed his life completely. He felt like the same person but advanced, or something strange like that. He felt he saw things differently; he really looked at stuff now. He noticed detail, he appreciated beauty.

He felt emotion differently. His spirit felt complex and imperative. He knew it was wrong to value what he had now because for that he would have to be thankful he had been locked up. But he couldn’t help it, he felt great, brilliant, cheerful.

He had trivial burdens that made him nothing but amused now. How could anything be as hard as being in prison? Nothing could be shoddier then that so he had zilch to feel bad about.

The thing that made it all extra wonderful was that Liz came in this package of new life. He treasured Liz with all his heart and he was doing his best to give her the content he now had but he was finding it hard when someone was intent on tarnishing his work and hurting her. He felt such burning detestation towards the person who could be so disgusting as to torture his adorable, innocent Liz. She was naive; it was one of her most infuriating, endearing qualities. She had rapidly become the most vital part of his existence and he’d be damned to see someone mar her contentment.

He was helping her the only way he could think of. All he wanted was to have his chance with her, to get to enjoy her without worrying every two seconds.

“Hey.”

The centre of his thoughts sat down beside him and took off her sunglasses. “I’ve been looking for you.”

He smiled. “You have?”

“Of course,” she replied. “How long have you been here?”

“About an hour.”

“Just sitting here?” She asked.

“Yes.” He reached out and tucked her hair behind her ears. She was more beautiful then the setting sun. “Thinking.”

“Thinking about what?” She squinted in the sunlight. “Anything in particular?”

“Of course.” He smiled. “That’s easy, you of course. I was thinking about you.”

She blushed. “Only good I hope?”

“How could anyone think anything but good about you, Liz?” He kissed her cheek.

She turned bright red. “You know you’re just embarrassing me now.”

“Is that right?” He asked. He pressed his lips to the freckles on the side of her face. “Where did you get your scar, right here?” He kissed the small mark above her brow.

“When I was little I was running around the lawn at my friend Alex’s house and I slipped on the wet grass and hit my head on the side of the swing set.” Liz rolled her eyes. “Had five stitches.”

Max smiled. “What about your soft hair and skin?” He ran his fingers through her hair and kissed her neck.

“Oh, well that’s just after many years of taking care of myself,” she answered.

“Your eyes? Are they too from looking after yourself?” He asked teasingly.

“What about my eyes?” She felt as if she could fly, right out across the lake…

“Their entrapping,” he answered.

“Oh, well no I must have just got that off my father or something,” she said. “What about you? Huh where did you get your eyes?”

He kissed her eye lids. “We’re not talking about me, we’re talking about you. What about your lips?”

“Lips?” Liz asked. “Maybe my mother?”

“Thank her for me,” he said leaning into her.

“I’ll be sure to.” His lips pressed against hers and he slowly made love to her mouth.

When he pulled away Liz kept her eyes closed. “Hmmm, I think you should do that again…right now…”

Max laughed. “You do?” he ran his fingers through her hair, shifting her closer. “Which part?”

Liz opened her eyes. “What do you mean which part? All of it. Give it all to me, quick.”

Max kissed her again. He moaned against her mouth, feeling an overwhelming desire to grow wings and soar high to heaven. Because that’s what this felt like, dreamland…

“Liz,” He whispered, “If I ask you to do something will you say yes to it? Whatever it is?”

She swallowed. “Mmm…yes I guess I would.”

“That’s very good to know,” he said standing up.

“Are you going to ask me something?” She asked.

“Not right now.” He held his hand out for her. “Come.”

“Where”—she tried to keep the excitement out of her voice—“are we going?”

“Anywhere, everywhere,” Max replied. “I feel anesthetized from sitting on that bench for too long, I need to stretch my legs.”

Liz took his hand and he pulled her up. “Oh, are you starting to use doctor terms now?”

“I think it’s a good idea,” Max said grinning childishly.

“Okay, just don’t get too over my head.” She clutched his hand in hers as they walked, close together, their shoulders touching. “Are you going to be one of those good doctors that actually know what their saying? Most doctors are thick; the answer to everything is antibiotics. They don’t even bother listening to you half the time. You know, you should prescribe natural products before—“

Max laughed. “Maybe you should be the doctor?”

“No, I don’t like seeing blood or anything remotely grotesque,” she said. “I wouldn’t last two minutes. I think I should just leave that to you.”

“Yes and I promise I’ll be the good kind. Even if I am going to be a pediatrician, you’ll never have to pay doctors fee’s again.”

“Now that is very good to know.”

They were silent for a moment; Liz could tell Max was trying to say something.

“You have a question for me?” She asked.

“I just…” He trailed off. “Liz, do you have anyone in mind that could be the one who’s following you—?”

She looked up at him. “Not really, I thought it could be this guy in my calculus class. His names Raymond…but I doubt it’s him. It must be someone I don’t know.”

“They must go here,” he alleged.

“Yeah. Can we not talk about this?”

“Hmm,” he mumbled. “We don’t have to talk at all…” He pulled her to him and kissed her. When he pulled away she was smiling. “I’m sorry, I just can’t”—he pressed his lips against hers—“stop kissing you.”

“Why are you apologizing?” She asked. “I see a lot of talking and not a lot of—”

ààààààààà

Maria put down her book and went to answer the door; on the other side was Isabel and some guy. “Hi, can I help you?” Maria had never met her. Her eyes roamed over the male appreciatively, he was hot.

“This is Liz’s dorm room right?” Isabel asked.

“Yeah and mine,” Maria replied. “Who are you?”

“Oh, I’m Isabel, Isabel Evans. I’m looking for Max, is he here?”

“Nope, not right now. Though he could live here considering how often he’s—”

Before she finished Isabel cut her off. “Yeah, okay so if he happens to come around here can you tell him his sisters looking for him? I’ve tried him on his cell but he’s switched it off. His friends back and—well yeah, you get the picture.” She nodded her head. “Bye.”

“Well she’s…rude,” Maria muttered to herself once she was gone. She shut the door and went back to her studying, only to be interrupted again five minutes later. She groaned and got up from her bed, how was she ever supposed to get any work done around here. “Yes?” She asked grumpily. Another good looking male at her door, okay so maybe she could get used to this…

“Is Max here?” He asked.

“Uh…no,” she said. “Have you tried his dorm? You know because he doesn’t actually LIVE here, like so many believe!”

“Right,” he muttered.

“Who are you? I’ll add you to the list of people who have been here for him,” She said.

“Michael,” he replied.

“Oh right!” She cried. “I’ve heard of you, you’re that guy that’s been away…”

“Yeah…if you could just tell him—”

“You could come in and wait if you want,” she asked.

He thought about it for a second. “I have some unpacking to do; I don’t have that much time…” He said. “I can’t. Bye.”

“Right, okay.”

As he was walking away, she fought the urge to whistle. Woah, maybe she really could benefit from Liz dating Max? All his good-looking friends and all…Note to self: Kiss Liz when she gets back.

Michael glanced back at her while he was walking away.

Opps, Maria thought. Caught in the act. “Um, welcome back by the way,” she said.

He nodded. “Thanks.”

She closed the door and went back to her books. Okay, she thought, In 1864 when the—

There was another knock on the door.

“OH, MY, GOD!” She cried. “What the hell is up with this place?” She flung the door open muttering to herself about stupid imbeciles interrupting her every two seconds… “Can I HELP you?” She asked angrily.

Oh, look at that, another male. “I was looking for Liz Parker, is she here?” He asked.

“Tell me, why is it no one comes here looking for me? I am IMPORTANT too! Just because I don’t have a good looking boyfriend with—who are you?”

“I’m Professor Hart, head of the science department…”

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.
“Right,” she muttered. “I’ll go flush my head in the toilet now.”

He looked at her peculiarly.

She swallowed. “I’m sorry, bad morning. Liz isn’t here right now.”

“Oh, well can you please tell her I need to see her about a proposal I have? She has to see me before Thursday.”

“Sure, okay. Where can she find you?” Maria asked. She was going to need a pad to remember everyone’s names soon…

“I can give you a number that she reach me on…do you have a pen?”

Maria got a pen and paper and he wrote down a phone number and handed it back. “Thanks,” he said.

“Sweet as,” she said. “I’ll make sure she gets it. Bye.”

“Goodbye.”

Closing the door for the third time, Maria went back to her studying once again. Surely no one would interrupt her again. No one was that unlucky. Three was enough.

Ten minutes later there was another knocking on the door. Trying to keep her temper under control Maria went and answered it again. The person banged unrelentingly until she got there. “I’m on my way stop with the banging…ALEX! Oh my God!”

Alex grinned at Maria. “Good surprise or bad surprise?”

“Good surprise!” She screamed jumping on him. “What are you doing here?”

“I came to see my two favorite girls, where’s Liz?” He asked hugging her back.

“She’s out with Romeo,” she answered. “I can’t believe you’re here, you’ve made my day, seriously.”

“I’m glad,” he said. “Are we going to stand in the doorway or are you going to let me in?”

Forgetting about her studying, Maria said, “Let’s go out, I’m sick of this bloody room.”

Chapter Twenty-one

Pressing her forehead against Max’s, Liz looked into his eyes and smiled shyly. “You better tell me where—”

“Oh finally! I have been looking all over for you.”

Isabel walked up to the blissful duo with a frustrated look plastered on her face. “Max, Michael’s back and he wants to see you.”

“Michael’s back?” Max asked.

“Hi Isabel,” Liz said. “His Hayden.” Hayden was Isabel’s boyfriend; Liz had met him at dinner at Max’s parent’s house.

“Yes, Michael’s back,” Isabel repeated. “So unless you’re…busy, go see him pronto.”

Max turned his attention back to Liz. “Do you mind? I’ll walk you back to your dorm?”

“Of course I don’t mind,” Liz answered. “You don’t have to walk me back to my dorm, I’m fine. Its broad daylight, what could happen?” She pulled her hands from his. “Say hello to Michael for me?”

Max grabbed her hands again, squeezing them in his own. “I’m walking you,” he smiled. “Don’t even try to argue.” He turned to Isabel, bypassing Hayden until he noticed something flicker in his gaze. He stopped and looked at the guy suspiciously. He was staring at Liz with a haughty, devilish grin on his face. Max’s hold on Liz tightened.

“Are you going there now?” Max asked Isabel.

“Yes,” she replied stiffly.

“Tell him I’ll be there in half an hour tops,” Max answered.

Isabel nodded once, grabbing her boyfriends arm before leaving.

“Come on,” Max tugged on Liz’s hand. “Let’s go.”

“I feel like such a child being walked everywhere,” she commented.

“Please don’t,” he said. “Feel loved, people care enough about you to make sure you are safe.”

“Not people”—her voice cracked with emotion—“you.”

Max stopped walking and stared at her. “What’s wrong Liz?” He stroked her cheeks.

“Nothing I just—nothing,” she said. “Let’s go.”

“I couldn’t live with myself if I let anything happen to you,” he reminded her.

She smiled. “I know, thank you.”

He smiled back. “Will you, tell me if anything’s wrong? You won’t hide it from me?” He stopped. “Yes…Liz will you tell me everything? Will you promise?”

“I promise I’ll try,” she said.

They never reached her dorm room. They ran into Maria coming down the stairs with Alex and Liz screeched and jumped on him. “Oh my God!” She exclaimed. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m here to see you,” he answered. “By the looks of it things you are fine.”

Liz hugged him tightly. “Oh it’s so good to see you.”

Max stood to the side wondering whether he should be jealous or not. His stomach lurched when Liz kissed his cheek and held on to him so tightly.

When he heard Maria call him Alex he visibly relaxed, he’d heard of the FRIEND Alex. He still felt the urge to yank her off him though.

“Max, this Alex!” Liz said. “Alex, I’ve told Max all about you.”

“Max?” Alex and Maria shared a look that Liz auspiciously missed but Max was not so fortunate. He swallowed and shook Alex’s hand, trying to be polite. He knew exactly was Alex was thinking at this second.

“We are going to have a big dinner,” Maria said to Liz. “It’s on Alex.”

“Liz, I better go…”

Liz wrapped her arms around Max’s neck and placed a big kiss on his lips. “I’ll ring you tonight?”

“I’ll probably be going out with Michael tonight so I don’t know how late I’ll be. It’s probably best if I ring you.” Cupping her cheek, he whispered to her for no one else to hear, “Have fun.”

The hidden context in his voice came loud and clear to Liz, who nodded and kissed him once again. “You too.”

She watched him go and then turned to Alex and looped her arm around him. “So where are we going money bags? Somewhere flash? Do I need to get changed?”

“I was thinking smorgasbord,” Maria offered.

“I was thinking Hooters,” Alex said grinning.

Liz rolled her eyes at both of them. “I’ll go get my car keys,” she said.

As she was heading back up the stairs she heard Alex said excitedly, “OHHH we can get the 50 wing bucket.”

As Liz was heading out she noticed a note on the door. She opened it and read it. “Maria?” she asked. “Why is Professor Hart’s phone number on the door?”

“Oh, he came by, he said he had a ‘proposal’ for you and you have to get in touch with him before Thursday.” Maria changed her shirt into a shiny red halter-neck and grinned. “What do you think Alex? Am I hot, or am I HOT?”

“I’m going to ring him now,” Liz said. “I wonder what he wants.” She dialed the number on her cell phone and waited patiently for him to answer. “Hello?”

“Hi, Professor Hart!” Liz said. “Maria just told me you stopped by?”

“Yes I did,” he replied. “Would you be able to come by the classroom tomorrow morning at nine?”

“Of course, what’s this about?”

“I’ll tell you tomorrow,” he replied.

“Okay, well bye.”

Liz hanged up and looked at her two friends happily. “Okay! Let’s go! Where are these promised chicken wings?”

ààààààààà

“Where are we going?” Max asked walking quickly to keep up with his friend.

“Out, a bar…I need to drink and possibly score.” Michael grinned. “Maybe it will be a lucky night and we’ll get someone for you too.”

Max shook his head. “Michael, I’m with Liz.”

Michael looked at him baffled. “And?”

“And, I’m with Liz,” Max said incredulously.

“Is there a point you’re trying to make or…” Michael shrugged. “So how good is she?”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“Well Liz? You are obviously bonking her so what’s she like?”

Max stopped walking. “What the hell is wrong with you Michael?” He asked.

“Wow, calm down.”

“Michael, even if I were sleeping with her that would be none of your business. And besides, you know I’m waiting until marriage.”

“Oh I thought that was just something you said to make girls think you are all sweet and sensitive.” Michael shrugged. “Whatever man, I’ll score…you can go do, whatever you do with Liz.”

“Would you shut up?” Max asked.

“Okay, let’s just go have my welcome home drink,” Michael said. “I won’t say anything more about it because obviously you’re very sensitive…”

“I’m not sensitive you’re being an asshole.”

“I’m sorry! Don’t let this ruin our night.” Michael punched his arm playfully. “You’re just…different I keep forgetting that.”

“What do you mean different?” Max was starting to wish he’d never agreed to go out.

“Well most guys would want to, you know, with any girl they are lucky enough to get…most guys don’t wait for marriage unless they are all sacred or something…you don’t go to church and you are a Christian so it’s strange.”

Max was silent.

“You could have ANY girl you want on this campus, not to mention this whole town but yet you say no to all of them…all except Liz Parker. What’s so great about her? Does she have three breasts or something?”

Despite his mood, Max laughed. “No Michael she doesn’t have three breasts…well not last time I checked.”

“Oh so you have at least seen the goods,” Michael said. “I was beginning to worry.”

“It’s not like that with me and Liz…well it is, the yearning is there but it’s not an objective thing. We can be together and still have fun without having to stick our tongues down each others throats.” Though we like to sometimes anyway, Max thought to himself.

“Well, fuck me,” Michael said. “Sounds like a drag, no offence.”

“One day you’ll know,” Max mumbled to himself.

“You just…you’ve known her now for just over half a year? That’s quick!”

“Ten months,” Max answered. “And feels like a life time.”

“Four of those months you were in penitentiary, three were spent away from her. You’ve been a couple for three.” Michael reminded him.

“I know I find it hard to believe myself.”

“WELL while you were off scooting all around the place with Liz, I met her room mate and if I say so myself, and I do, holy hell she’s fine!”

“Maria?” Max asked shocked. “When did you meet her?”

“I was looking for you,” Michael said. He jumped into Max’s car and tapped his hands on his knees. “I could definitely go for her…”

“She’s already ‘gone’ for some of Tim,” Max mentioned.

“Tim?” Michael asked. “The lucky bastard, he gets everyone worth having.”

He hasn’t had Liz, Max thought. And in his opinion, she was the only one worth having. “But don’t forget it’s exactly that fact that lost him his scholarship.”

“Yeah I never said he wasn’t stupid, I just said he was lucky.”

At the bar Max’s sides were directly flanked with acquaintances from the campus. He tried to courteously extricate himself from the females but some were more unrelenting than others.

“What is it about you?” Michael asked watching amusedly while taking a swig of his beer.

“Why don’t you ask them?” Max replied. He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. Quietly he said, “Like leeches.”

“Let me take a fluky guess,” Michael said. “Liz isn’t a bloodsucking parasite?”

Max laughed. “No actually I don’t think I’d mind even if she was.”

“Please stop, it’s all too deep for me,” Michael said. “So how long do you think this ‘crush’ is going to last?”

“Crush?” Max asked. “Oh no, this isn’t some fling Michael. I don’t think I could just ‘get over’ Liz. It would be easier channeling the moons of Venus to collide with the sun above us.”

Michael laughed. “Whipped.”

“She’s what I never knew I wanted,” Max said.

“Its bloodcurdling just imagining it, so you going to marry her?”

Max swallowed. “I—I…yes, hopefully.”

“Do you want me to come with you to buy a ring?”

“Would you?”

ààààààààà

“I know what you’re thinking.” Liz put a French fry in her mouth and swallowed it. She eyed her male friend favorably.

“Shocking,” Alex said smiling. “Maria what does she know?”

“I don’t know Al.” Maria was too busy eating to notice what was going on. She stared at the women walking around the place with repugnance. “Why can’t I have gigantic breasts like that?” She asked. “Look at them! They are mammoth; I’d be a wonder woman. Males would be in awe just by looking at me.”

Liz laughed. “I’m a flat board compared to these girls,” she said. “Now, would you stop shooting each other looks and Alex, lecture me on my relationship like you’re dying too.”

“I don’t want to lecture you,” he said. “You know my views on your relationship.”

“Why? Yes I know how you feel, you made that clear to me months ago before Maria and I came here. But please give him a chance; he’s what’s most important to me.”

“It’s just strange!” Alex said.

“Put all that jail stuff away in a storeroom, a locker, maybe even a cubbyhole if you like…just while you’re here. Please try and get used to Max because I don’t intend to get rid of him because of some wrong feeling you have, as much as you mean to me.” She patted his hand friendly. “Now, let’s not talk about this again okay.”

Alex sighed. “Okay, sure.”

“Now, what about that chicken, good huh?” Liz laughed. She was in too good a frame of mind; she wouldn’t let anything mess it up. Max had put her in soaring spirits; this afternoon had been too superb. He just loved her so much, as much as she loved him.

ààààààààà

“Professor Hart called,” Liz said. “He said he wants to meet me tomorrow at nine.” She picked at the fluff on her jeans. Maria was in bed so she went out into the hallway and was now sitting with her back against the wall where she wouldn’t interrupt anyone. She lazily held the phone between her cheek and shoulder so she didn’t have to hold it.

“I wonder what he wants,” Max replied with a yawn.

“You’re tired? I’ll go…you have classes tomorrow?” Liz said.

“I’m not tired, how was your dinner? Where did you go?” Max was lying on his bed in his dim dorm room staring at the ceiling.

Liz laughed. “We went to Hooters.”

“Well,” Max said smiling. “Have fun?”

“Of course, who wouldn’t enjoy being served by women ten times more appealing then yourself and making you feel self-conscious all night?” Liz said. “It was wonderful.”

“I’m sure I would have enjoyed it,” Max teased.

Liz rolled her eyes. “Typical. Where did you go?”

“Just a bar with Michael…” Max trailed off.

“Well that must have been nice. You had a lot to catch up on?” Liz stared down the near-empty hallway. Stella was outside her door talking to some guy and another girl she didn’t know was sitting by the stair case trying to study. Liz didn’t need to guess why she was out in the hall.

“Yeah, we did a lot of talking,” Max said. “He said he met Maria, he seemed to like her a lot.”

“Maria?” Liz frowned. “When did he meet her? What is it with your friends? She seems to like them all.”

“Are you sure it isn’t just males in general?” Max asked.

“Don’t talk about my friend that way,” Liz growled teasingly.

“Sorry.” Just as teasingly.

When he yawned again Liz got up. “Okay, tine for a little siesta. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Yes, you will. I love you,” he said.

“And I love you. Goodbye.”

“Hmm, bye.”

Chapter Twenty-two

A very bizarre climate phenomenon was happening in Boston according to Maria. She fanned herself with her hand and glanced around the other students in her class. No one was really listening to the professor, everyone was dehydrated and sweaty. She was wearing her thinnest, coolest singlet and her cut off jean shorts with sandals. Just days ago she was wearing jackets, stockings and sweaters.

She wasn’t going to criticize, she was a sun-drenched girl and she appreciated the high temperature. She DID grow up in Roswell for heavens sake! The hot weather would do everyone some good and that’s why while she was supposed to be listening to her professor jabber on about hospitality she planned an afternoon trip to the swimming pool. She needed to soak in some rays and hopefully get a tan, Liz was lucky she was born with naturally dark skin like a Spanish princess.

Maria had always been envious of that; especially since she was naturally as pasty as pork meat. She would invite Alex and Liz along, and Liz would want to invite Max and maybe…just maybe, or hopefully? He would invite his hunky friend Michael along. This afternoon was slowly looking brighter and brighter!

She just couldn’t wait to go tell Liz of her plans. Ah yes, an afternoon by the pool getting sunscreen rubbed into her back was definitely just was what she needed. Now she just had to decide whether they would go to a public pool or to Liz’s father’s-father’s house that had a big swimming pool. Hmm, dirty public water or clean private water. The decision wasn’t hard, especially when she realized there was the possibility that Liz’s grandfathers girlfriend might be there and she made the nicest mini pizza’s.

Now all she had to do was wait for this silly class to end. There should be a rule that when the weather got this hot all classes were cancelled. But NO why would they do that, who wants the students to be comfortable anyway?

Finally when class ended she strode quickly in the direction of C block but when she got to Max’s dorm Tim informed her that Max had left half an hour ago to meet Liz at his car.

A woman on a mission, she sat down on one of the benches in the quad and tried to get a hold of Liz on her cell phone. There was no way her plans were going to be cancelled or ruined now, not when she’d gotten her hopes up so much.

àààààààà

A great sentiment of triumph deluged Liz’s body as she walked proudly in the direction of her boyfriend’s car. A smile marred her lips, a light beamed in her eyes. For the first time in an extensive period of time she felt pleased with herself. She had just got back from seeing Professor Hart and he had given her the best news! She was just bubbling to tell someone of her delight.

“Hey there.” How did he manage to sneak up behind her like that? She spun around and threw her arms around him.

“Guess what?” She said barely able to hide her enthusiasm.

He laughed. “What?”

“Professor Hart told me that I have been chosen, with four other students, to give a science presentation at the memorial hall across town!” she squealed quietly with delight. “Can you believe it? They picked me, a lowly first year, to give a presentation!”

Max had already known that she was going to get picked. He had been talking to Professor Hart early yesterday morning when he found out. He wanted to wait until she found out for herself to share her happiness. He was glad he had, she was practically beaming. It was a very good sight, to see the pleasure in her smile finally reach her eyes. His heart missed a beat; she was so beautiful when she smiled.

“That’s…incredible! Wow!” He hugged her. “They couldn’t have picked a better person, seriously.”

Liz knew he would be supportive. “I just hope I don’t let them down,” she said. “I HAVE to do this well! Imagine how this will look on my C.V. He said students have been offered jobs according to their success on this one event!”

He smiled. “I couldn’t be prouder.”

“Oh thank you!” she cried. She kissed his lips. “Come on, I’m not going to forget you promised me brunch, I will not let you get out of it.”

“I wouldn’t dream of trying,” he said. He opened the car door for her and then hurried around to his side and hopped in.

“Oh my God! What if I get a job offer in my first year! Wouldn’t that just be incredible? Unrealistic but incredible.” She was so happy she laughed. “What’s up with this weather? Do you have air conditioning in here?”

“Yes, that button the left…lower, yeah.”

They went to a little café in town and while they were ordering Liz’s cell phone rang. “Maria? Hi, what’s up?”

“Where are you?”

“I’m a café in town with Max, why?” Liz took a seat at a table while Max paid.

While Maria unfolded her detailed plan of the afternoon Liz sipped at her drink waiting for Max to join her. “We can’t go to my grandfathers he’s away. If you want to go it will have to be a public pool.”

“Okay fine whatever.”

“I’ll ask Max okay?”

“Ask him now! AND ask him to bring his friend!”

“Which one?” Liz asked amusedly.

“That Michael guy,” Maria said. “Go on, ask him to invite him.”

“Why not Tim?”

“I’m done with him I need someone new,” Maria replied. “You understand!”

“Not really.”

Max came and sat down next to her and she asked him if he wanted to go for a swim. He did.

“She wants Michael to come,” Liz said.

“What? Why?”

“You mean you can’t guess?” she asked.

He rolled his eyes. “Wait a minute it’s Maria, of course I do.”

“I HEARD THAT!”

Liz grimaced. “We’ll see you there in an hour?”

“Fine and you can tell Max to shove a carrot up his ass. I am NOT a slut.”

“I’ll do that, bye.”

“No need to, I heard,” Max said raising his eye brows. Liz put her phone down and picked up her drink.

“I know Maria’s a bit…slutty, but maybe you should refrain from talking about her like that when she can hear, the last thing I want is for you two hating each others guts and refusing to be in the same room together.”

Max leaned over the table and kissed her. “I’ll do better then that, I’ll refrain from talking about her at all.”

“That’s good, she is my best friend.”

àààààààà

“No, he can’t make it,” Max explained to Maria. “Sorry.”

Maria frowned. “Did you try hard or did you do your stupid suttle ‘come if you want to’ thing?”

“Maria!” Liz said. “I was the one who talked to him, leave Max alone. Alex it here, be happy and leave it alone.” She wrapped her arm around Alex’s waist and they walked towards the building.

“So immature,” Alex mocked.

Liz laughed. “Shut up.”

Maria and Max walked along behind them giving each-other evil glances.

“Stay away from me,” Maria said.

“You don’t have to tell me to, I’ll do it willingly.” Max walked ahead, catching up to Liz and Alex. He had to make it work with Maria he didn’t know why he was acting this way. Maria was important to Liz so that made her important to Max. As hard as it was to believe that they were friends, they were so completely different.

When Maria went ahead into the changing rooms Liz turned to Max and said, “I’m sorry about Maria Max, you know what she’s like.”

“I know what she’s like and I don’t care what she thinks of me, we don’t need another obstacle in our way, not after what we’ve already been through.” He kissed her softly. “And please don’t apologize for her.”

Liz bit her lip, nodded and walked away. In front of the mirror after they were changed Liz hesitantly said, “Maria I’m sorry about Max and what he said…”

“Don’t apologize for that pompus-ass.”

“Maria!” Liz said. “You can’t expect people to say nothing when you go throw yourself at random guys all the time.”

“Oh so you agree with him?” Maria looked hurt.

“No, Maria I don’t because I know you. Max doesn’t so much and all he knows is what he sees…you have to admit that you have been a bit of a flirt lately.”

“He still doesn’t have to be so rude.”

“How do you know he wasn’t kidding, because I know for a fact he was.” Liz pulled her hair back into a ponytail. “Please don’t do this; you know how much he means to me. I need both of you. I mean what if one day Max and I got married and you hated each other? What would I do then?”

“Wait, did you just say married? You’re kidding me right.”

“Well…” Liz bit her lip. “Why is that so out of the question?”

“Well he’s a male Liz, don’t get your hopes up.”

Liz frowned. “What does that mean?”

“Oh you aren’t that naïve, you know males always have commitment problems.”

Liz thought about Max as she knew him. He’d never appeared to have commitment problems to her; in fact he’d been the one to initiate the relationship with his persuasive ways. Not that she wasn’t glad he did, she was ecstatic he showed so much interest in him. “I don’t think that’s Max, Maria.”

“Well I don’t know him well but he’s a male Liz, and I know from experience not don’t expect too much from them.”

Liz thought Maria was being a bit harsh towards men. She didn’t say anything, grabbed her bag and headed outside to the swimming pool. Max and Alex were already in the pool deep in conversation.

She snuck up on them and jumped on Max’s back. He didn’t even jump. “Did you know I was coming?” she whispered into his ear. She remained on his back and wrapped her arms around his neck. His bare skin felt so nice against her front.

“I sensed you,” he replied simply as if it was the most natural thing in the world. When Maria emerged from the changing rooms she said she wanted to go into the deeper pool and Alex went with her leaving Max and Liz alone.

Liz stood up and Max touched the scar on her hip with his finger, tracing it softly. “Where did you get that?” he asked gently.

Her eyes seemed to cloud over. He understood. Leaning into her, he pressed his lips to the scar and pressed his forehead to her skin. “I don’t want any part of your body to remind you of a bad memory.”

“Max,” she said moving away and sitting down. “Why do you do that?”

He frowned. “Do what?”

“You let me show my pain like you can't even start to feel yours.” She touched his shoulder, her expression was serious. “What about you?”

“What about me?”

“I’m not the only one who went through a life changing experience. You make me heal, I get to laugh again but you…do you ever look at my progress and think, can I be you?” she swallowed. “What can we do to make you good?”

He brought her into his arms and hugged her. “Don’t you understand? You make me heal too.”

àààààààà

Max lay on his back staring at the ceiling. An old pastime from long boring hours in his cell. It was one in the morning and he couldn’t sleep. He was trying not to think about what Liz had said earlier. Of course there were still times when he thought back to being locked in the confinement and shuddered but he never thought of what he’d gone through as being as bad what she’d gone through. He didn’t need to heal, he was strong and he was too thankful to be out to dwell on fearing it.

Well that’s what he’d always thought anyway.

Suddenly the telephone rang scaring him half to death.

“Hello?” he grumbled.

“Max?”

Isabel.

“What is wrong? Why are you ringing at this time of the night, excuse me—morning?”

“I found something out,” she said. “About Hayden.”

“And this couldn’t wait until tomorrow?”

“No, it couldn’t. I’ve been holding it off all night and I’ve decided I just have to tell you.”

“Okay, shoot. But quickly, I’m trying to sleep.” Max switched on his bedside lamp and winced when the sudden light sent a shiver through him.

“Hayden’s the one stalking Liz.”

“WHAT?” He exclaimed sitting up suddenly.

“We were talking tonight over dinner and I said something about this immature guy I know who pulled a prank on this other guy and then out of the blue he laughed and said, ‘Like that Liz Parker girl!’ And I said, ‘I don’t find what’s happening to Liz very funny’ and he got all defensive and said someone was just having fun with her and the look in his eyes! GOD! It’s him that’s doing it Max. He’s such a creep!”

“I’m going to fucking kill him.”

Isabel never heard Max swear, she was shocked and scared he’d do something he’d regret. “Max no just leave the police to—”

“Like hell I’ll leave the police to it.”

“Max, don’t do anything please! I’m sorry he did it but it’s my entire fault because he got all the information on Liz and you off me. I didn’t think it mattered to tell him all about it but obviously it was because—”

“I can’t talk about this anymore. I have to go.”

“Max, please don’t do anything stupid, shit, I knew you’d do this…”

“Do what? Be mad at a stupid prick for hurting someone I love? Goodbye Iz.” He hanged up and got up out of bed. There was absolutely no way he’d sleep now. He got dressed and threw on a jacket, slamming the door as he left the dorm.

Chapter Twenty-three

Max walked around campus trying to calm down. He knew Isabel was right; he couldn’t just go barge into Hayden’s house and beat him to death. He wanted to so much. He knew that the police were just going to give him a lecture and a slap on the hand, so to speak. What he wouldn’t give to just go there and…

No, he had to calm down. He clenched his fists and his jaw. What could he do to keep from tearing his hair out? He knew. Slowly he made his way to Liz’s dorm. How could someone hurt her? She was so innocent and so…perfect. He didn’t knock on the door he just used the key Liz had given him to get in. He always kept it in the back pocket of his jeans. In the dark he could see her sleeping figure tucked under her blankets. He sighed, she was so beautiful.

She didn’t wake up when he lay down on the bed beside her. He pulled off his shoes and wrapped his arms around her waist. She sighed and pressed her face into his chest.

Was she awake? He couldn’t tell. With tears in his eyes he whispered, “I’m so sorry Liz.”

She mumbled something incoherent to acknowledge him.

“You deserve none of the hurt you’ve been through.” He tightened his hold on her. “I did everything I could to keep you from being hurt again. Know you’re my main motivation for everything. Through it all you are the basis to all my thoughts. I won’t let anyone upset you ever.”

She sighed and wrapped her arms around him. “Sleep,” she mumbled almost inaudibly.

>>>>>>>>

“Is she sure?” Liz wasn’t looking at him; she was staring out her window blankly. He needed her to look at him so he could know if she was upset. He lay on her bed in the same position he had woken up in.

“She seemed fairly certain, yes,” he replied.

They heard Maria shuffling around in her room and her radio turn on. They heard the curtains pull open and the wardrobe door squeaking. Her head popped out of her door to see if Liz was awake. When she saw them she yawned into her hand. “You don’t mind if I turn my music up?”

“Go ahead,” Liz said nodding. “What do you want for breakfast?”

“Let’s go to Aunty and Uncles, I don’t have a class until twelve.” She walked towards the door in her pajamas and went out into the hall. Max chose this moment to finally sit up.

Liz came and sat down next to him. “Do you want to come?” she asked. She was looking at him, her eyes held a sadness in them. He tucked her hair behind her ears.

“I can’t,” he said regrettably. “I have a class in an hour.”

“Oh.” She looked down. “Okay.”

“This afternoon I’m going apartment shopping,” he said. He playfully knocked her down onto her back and looked down at her.

“Good luck,” she said plainly.

“Cheer up,” he remarked. “Come on. Please?”

“I’m trying.”

His hands ran up her hips to her sides where he unexpectedly started tickling her. She jumped and tried to wiggle away. He shifted so he was straddling her hips. “Laugh!” he cried.

She bit her lip trying to hold her giggles in. He bent down and kissed her lips opening them with his tongue while he continued to tickle her. She burst into a fit of laughter and tried to get away but he was too strong for her.

“That’s better,” he said. Sighing he got off her and fell back onto the mattress with a soft thud. She snuggled into his side.

“Now are you going to tell me why when I went to bed you weren’t here but when I woke up you were?” she smiled dopily.

“I think you have a bad memory, I was so here when you went to bed.”

She laughed. “Liar, then how would you have gotten a phone call from Isabel?”

“Would you believe I had my cell phone on me?”

“Oh, okay. Where is it then?”

Max laughed. “Okay you got me.”

Maria stumbled back into the room. “You’re still not dressed?” she asked. “Come on get a move on, chop, chop! I am hungry.”

“I need to go anyway,” Max said. He got up and brushed at his wrinkled clothing unconsciously. Liz kissed him goodbye and thanked him for telling her about Hayden. “Let’s go out to dinner,” she said impulsively. “I feel like going somewhere nice. Pick me up when you have finished apartment hunting?”

“My parents want me to have dinner with them tonight,” Max said. “I’ll ring you.”

“Okay.”

“Bye Maria,” Max remembered trying to be nice.

When he was gone Maria asked, “Again?”

“Again, what?” Liz asked. She walked to the wardrobe with a spay smile on her face and looked for something to wear.

“He stayed over again.” Maria said. She walked into her room and continued to talk through the open door. “Should I be worried?”

“Worried about what?” Liz asked frowning. She pulled out a black skirt and shirt and walked over to the bed.

“You two sharing a bed,” Maria answered. Her head popped out her door. “I mean, how far have you two, you know, gone?”

Liz turned bright red. “Maria!” she cried. “Shut up!”

Maria rolled her eyes and disappeared into her room again. “Oh come on Liz, Max is gorgeous and you love each other so you must have done something?” she laughed. “He can never keep his hands off you. As your best friend I am entitled to hearing about these sorts of things.”

“Oh is that right?” Liz asked. She pulled her shirt over her head. “Well there’s nothing to tell.”

Maria popped out the door again, this time with her hands on her hips. “You mean there’s nothing you’ll tell me or as in, you haven’t DONE anything?”

“Maria…”

“Well come on Liz! You’re kidding me, you two haven’t done anything?”

Liz frowned. “Maria he’s being patient with me. He knows it’s strange for me after…” she trailed off.

“Yes I know, I know. He’s a saint but what about you?” Maria asked. “Don’t you ever just look at those ‘dreamy’ brown eyes and muscled arms and want to tear his clothes off to see what’s underneath?”

Bright red Liz confessed, “Well of course I do! But sometimes when we are making out and things start getting…well, intense, I’ll remember something from my attack and I’ll just freak out. I am not afraid of Max in the least but it’s like I have no control and even that part of me that doesn’t want to stop can’t compete with the part of me that’s petrified.”

Maria patted her arm comfortingly. “What do you think will make you feel safe?”

Liz slumped down onto the bed. “Some days are better then others…”

“GOD!” Maria cried. “I wish I knew how to help Liz.”

“I know you do. I wish I knew how to help myself,” Liz said. She glanced at her watch and got up again. “Let’s go have breakfast before it gets late.”

“Time is probably the answer,” Maria said hopefully. “I bet soon you’ll have no problems.”

“Yeah, let’s hope so.”

>>>>>>>>>>>

“Alex, you have no idea how much I am going to miss you,” Maria said. “I wish you didn’t have to go.”

Liz agreed. She kicked her legs back and forth against the fence she was sitting on. The bus would be there any minute.

“I’ll see you at Christmas back in Roswell,” Alex reminded them trying to be positive. “Well that is, if Liz can tear herself away from Max for the holiday break.”

Liz smiled. “Maybe Max can come?”

Maria and Alex rolled their eyes.

When Maria left for her car quickly, saying she’d forgotten something, Liz wrapped her arms around Alex’s waist and hugged his sadly. “Alex,” she said. “You don’t hate him do you?”

“I don’t hate him,” Alex said. He pressed his face to her hair. “Jesus I’m going to miss you!”

“Oh Alex, I am too!” she cried. A tear dripped down her cheek. “You remember when we were young and I used to sleep over at your house? I would get scared of the creaks and different sounds and I’d climb into your bed and you’d tuck me into you, like this?” She pressed her forehead to his chest.

“I remember,” he said. “You were a little wimp.”

Liz chuckled. “I certainly was.”

“Liz, do you still get scared of the creaks and different noises?” he asked. “Does Max tuck you into him like this?”

She nodded sadly. “But that doesn’t mean I don’t need you.”

“I know that,” he said. “You’ll always need me. We’re blood brothers remember? That way you’ll never forget me.”

“Oh like that’s possible.” Liz smiled. “Like anyone could ever forget you Alex.”

Maria came back and they hugged all together as if they were five again. Then Alex climbed onto the bus and as it drove away waved back goofily, smiling happily.

“BYE ALEX!” Maria screamed.

>>>>>>>>>>

“Stop studying,” Liz said. She got up from her chair next to Max’s. “Let’s have a break.”

He put down his pen and spun his swivel chair around to face her. “Do you want something to eat?” He asked. Always so attentive.

“No,” she answered. She stepped closer to him so she was standing in-between his thighs and put her hands on his shoulders.

“Do you want to go out?” He asked. His eyes were warm and loving. She smiled.

“No.”

The corners of his mouth twitched adorably. “What do you—?” she cut him off by covering his mouth with hers. She climbed onto his chair and straddled his hips.

She pressed her forehead to his. “I want to stay here,” she said, “and be near you.” Her lips trailed down his cheek to his ear where she whispered, “Is that all right?” She kissed his neck flicking her tongue over his skin.

His hands went to her back where they grasped at her shirt. “All right?” he asked. “What are you, crazy?” He slouched back further onto the chair and held her closer to him.

“Definitely,” she mumbled her lips returning to his. She kissed him harshly thrusting her tongue against his. He sighed happily and eagerly returned as much devotion. “Let’s go over to the bed,” she said suddenly. Max wondered where her forwardness was suddenly coming from. He lifted her up and walked over to the bed with his legs wrapped around his waist.

“I haven’t had a nightmare in a week,” she said. Now that Hayden had been punished for what he had done and was no longer harassing her she had gotten through the week extremely well. She decided she was ready to get better. She could feel herself recovering !finally! She was annoyed that because of Hayden it hadn’t started happening earlier but being angry about it wasn’t going to help. She always turned the light on and checked rooms before going into them and was scared of walking alone but she knew that those would be consequences she would forever live with. Just the occasional thing made her anxious but for the first time in a while she felt like she was making progress.

She sighed happily against Max’s mouth.

He grinned down at her and he climbed on top of her. “You haven’t?” he asked. “I guess that calls for a celebration.”

“I thought that’s what we were doing?” she said chuckling quietly. There was only one part of her life that she wasn’t sure if she was ready for. It made it all better that Max was being so patient. She knew he got frustrated sometimes and she didn’t blame him. They were slowly making progress and Liz knew one day she’d be able to go all the way with him without worrying. That is if he wanted to, since he was waiting until marriage.

He kissed her neck only to have Liz push him away so she could lift her t-shirt over her head. He was shocked but delighted and reeled at the wonderful feeling of her bare skin against him. She was wearing a pink bra that made him shudder with arousal.

Her small hands ran up and down his sides enticingly when she unexpectedly bunched his t-shirt into her small fists and tugged it upwards. He arched upwards and lifted his arms so she could pull it over his head. When his chest came back down to rest on her tiny body they both moaned at the feeling of their bare skin together. They stopped kissing for a minute to marvel at the wonderful bliss. Liz ran her fingers over his shoulder and down his arm.

“I love you,” she whispered. “I don’t think I tell you that enough.”

“You do,” he said. “When you look at me I see myself in your eyes. That’s truth enough.” He smiled.

She smiled back. She was thinking about how it would feel to have all of him bare against her. She may be scared to continue but she still had her thoughts and desires. She kissed his lips again, this time more passionately, showing him just how much she felt for him. Her arms went around his neck and—

“WOW!” Tim said coming into the dorm. “Sorry guys, ignore me I’m just going through to my room... Maybe we should make a sign to put on the door: Do not disturb.” He closed his door behind him and both Max and Liz sighed disappointedly.

“When you have your own apartment we won’t have this problem,” Liz reminded him.

“Yes, the sooner the better.”

>>>>>>>

Chapter twenty-four

“It’s quite big,” Isabel said glancing around. “Why do you want a big place?”

“It’s not big,” Max argued. “Anyway I didn’t even notice its size.”

It was a beautiful apartment, Isabel thought. It was a shame it would be wasted on her brother. The entrance led through into the lounge which had wooden floors and large windows looking down on the city below. It wasn’t too far from the hospital Max would be doing his training at so Max was lucky to find a place in this building. The kitchen was small but had a beautiful blue tiled floor.

Isabel sighed. She could do a lot with this place. “Why do you need two bedrooms? Why don’t you share with Michael? It won’t cost as much.” She crossed her arms over her chest and walked towards the windows.

“I don’t want to share with Michael,” Max said. He wasn’t going to tell Isabel that he planned to ask Liz to marry him and move in to his apartment. He wasn’t sure when he would ask her, he was very nervous.

“Why two rooms then?”

“Why not two rooms?” Max asked. “I can afford it! It’s a nice apartment. What difference does it make to you?”

“I’m just worried you’re spending more then you need to.” Isabel shrugged indifferently.

“What are you talking about? There are no other apartments in this area.” Max leaned against the wall. “Mom and Dad like it, why can’t you just be happy for me.”

“I am happy for you.” She smiled. “Look at you so old and grown up. It’s weird!” Her high heels clicked against the floor. “You’re right this place is beautiful. I hope you will let me decorate it.”

“I don’t have a large budget, I can’t afford to let you decorate it.” Max pulled the keys out of his pocket and headed towards the door. “I have to get to work,” he said. “I’ll give you a ride back.”

In the elevator on that way down Isabel asked what Liz thought of the apartment.

“She hasn’t seen it yet,” Max replied simply. What was his heart and soul doing right now? He smiled at the thought of her.

Isabel noticed the dopey smile cross over his face at the mention of the little girl. She rolled her eyes but couldn’t help smiling, too. “Max…” she said. “Are you thinking about asking her to move it with you?”

He looked at her surprised.

“Don’t look at me like that. I’m not stupid!” she pulled her mirror out of her purse and checked her reflection. “You are aren’t you?”

Max studied her. Did she have a problem with that?

“Well I think it’s a great idea. So if you haven’t thought of it, maybe you should.” Isabel looked at him and grinned at the shock on his face. “She makes you happy, what can I say?”

He laughed. “You are kidding right? You’ve never been supportive of Liz and I.”

“Well I am now, okay?” she said. “And besides I feel I owe you one after that unfortunate incident with Hayden.” She put her mirror back in her purse.

“I’m going to ask her to marry me,” Max confessed.

Isabel gasped. “Oh my God!” The elevator doors opened but Isabel stayed put. Max had to motion her out. She power walked after him. “Max, she’s only nineteen!”

“Yes? And I’m only twenty three. What’s your point?”

“It might scare her off… you know, such a big commitment and all. Her life hasn’t even started yet; do you think she’ll want to be tied down? I don’t even want to consider marriage and I’m older then both of you.”

Max frowned. He’d never thought of that. “I don’t think she’ll say no,” he said.

“Have you even thought about what her parents will think?” Isabel asked. “They are going to freak!”

“You don’t know that for certain. Mom and dad don’t mind…”

“You’re twenty three!” Isabel exclaimed. “She’s NINETEEN!”

“So we’re starting early,” Max said. He wanted her to stop talking, she was making him start to doubt his decision that he had been so certain of earlier.

“I’m just worried it will make things awkward between you two if she says no.” Isabel hopped into the car and buckled her seat belt. “Max if she says no…”

“Then I’ll understand.”

“Will you? I know what you’re like. You’ll start freaking out that she doesn’t want you when you know better!”

“Liz is the one Isabel; you know I wouldn’t commit to something so serious if I didn’t feel completely serious about the person.” Max glanced at her when they stopped at the traffic lights. “One day you’ll know how it feels.”

Isabel snorted unattractively. Something she only did in the company of her family. “I really doubt that Max.”

“You will,” Max said. “You’re beautiful. You have a date every second night! Who wouldn’t want you?” He laughed. “Don’t tell anyone I said that.”

“Max that’s the problem…looks is all I am.” She took off her seat belt off as they pulled into her apartment’s car park. “So,” she said. “Have you picked her ring yet?”

“Nope. Michael said he would come with me.”

“Oh God no!” Isabel grimaced. “Not Michael. I’m coming too. There is no way you two can pick out a nice ring on your own.”

Max laughed. “I bet I could but just to be sure, okay you can come.”

Isabel got out of the car and waved goodbye. Max tooted his car horn twice and drove away.

>>>>>>>

“You mean to tell me that everyone has seen this glamorous apartment except me?” Liz rolled her eyes dramatically. “I love knowing my importance to you.” She fell back onto the couch and put her arms behind her head.

Max put the video in the VCR and turned on the television.

“Okay, we’re off!” They were babysitting for Liz’s-Aunties-friends-house.

“The twins are sleeping so you shouldn’t have any problems,” Wes said pulling his coat and then helping his wife with hers.

“Okay!” Liz said. “Have fun.”

“Liz, Max we can’t thank you enough for during this for us,” Rachel said.

“Don’t even worry,” Liz said. “See you later.”

“Bye,” Max said.

On his way out Wes turned off the light and winked suggestively at Max. Liz noticed and laughed. Max just smiled and sat back on the couch beside her. Liz rested her head on his lap and looked up at him. “So tell me when do I get to see this famous apartment?”

“When do you want to see it?”

“When am I allowed to see it?”

“Whenever you want,” Max said and laughed.

Liz smiled. “I want to see it tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow it is.”

She sat up and pressed her nose to his neck. “Hmm,” she purred, “you smell so good! I can’t get enough of your smell.” She lay back down again. When he opened his mouth to say something she grinned and exclaimed, “Shh! The movies starting.”

He rolled his eyes and leaned down to cover her mouth with his. He didn’t relent until she pushed him away gently. “I’m missing the movie,” she said.

“Oh is that all? I thought you had something important to say.” He kissed her again. Again not stopping.

“Max,” Liz murmured against his lips.

“This movie,” he panted slightly, “Got bad ratings.”

“Oh is that right?” she smiled as he kissed her neck.

“Two stars out of five.” His hands touched her thighs. “Bad, no?”

“Then why did you get it in the first place?” Liz asked, her fingers itching to touch him.

“So we could sit here and not watch it.” His tongue teased her skin.

“Oh, then why didn’t you just say so?” she sat up and wrapped her arms around his neck, nibbling on his lips gently. Max grabbed her thigh and turned her around so she was straddling his hips. She moved up and down gently against him, teasing him like she had learnt to do lately as their relationship got more intense.

He groaned. “God Liz I have some control but not much. Please sto—” She giggled.

“You don’t need control that’s the whole point!” she ran his hand up his thigh. She wanted to touch him but she didn’t know how he’d react. She rubbed his chest up and down. “Do you like that?” she asked nervously.

“Hmm,” he mumbled and nodded.

“Is there”—she blushed furiously—“somewhere else you might like me to do that?” biting her lip she tried to hide her excitement.

Max’s eyes popped open and he stared at her in surprise. “I think…” he said slowly, “there may be one place…yes.”

She grinned and then kissed his lips. “Okay.” Max’s breath caught in his throat when she reached down in-between them and unbuttoned his jeans. She wouldn’t catch his eye, he knew she was embarrassed. She seemed to undo the zipper at an agonizingly slow pace and finally she ran her finger along the elastic of his boxers.

“Max,” she purred and kissed his lips. “Tell me if I do something you don’t like okay?”

Liz does something he didn’t like? Impossible! He shuddered with delight. Finally her small hand slipped under the elastic and her soft fingers touched him. Gently at first and then as she got more used to the idea she began rubbing him up and down. While she touched him she kissed his neck and ran her free hand through his hair.

Max tried to keep from moaning so the children in their rooms wouldn’t hear them. Her fingers touched the tip of his arousal, massaging it and fondling it. She wanted to look at him but that was impossible in the dark room.

Max felt her hand slip down the side of his face until she was cupping his cheek. She smiled unsurely at him and kissed his lips passionately, not stopping her movements on his lower half.

“Christ Liz,” he mumbled with his eyes closed. He was so close.

Liz rubbed harder, up and down until his release came powerfully. She caught the liquid in her hand and wiped it on his boxers, trying to keep from smiling to herself.

There was a complete feeling of delight to bring Max to climax. She kissed his lips again, unable to hide how happy she was to do that for him. Would he mind if she did it again? Maybe she should wait a couple of minutes.

Pressing her forehead to his, she whispered, “Max was that…okay?”

Max seemed at a loss for words. “Ye-ea-yeah,” he said. He opened his eyes and looked at her. He was in awe.

She smiled brightly against his mouth when he leaned in to kiss her. When he pulled away he instructed, “Lie down.”

She did as she was told and as she was she heard him zip up his trousers. He lay down on top of her and began unbuttoning her blouse.

“MOMMY!”

Liz sighed annoyed and got up to go check on the little boy. “Hey Mathew,” she said standing in the doorway. “What’s the matter darling?”

He was in tears. “Where’s my mom?”

“She’s gone to get some milk from the shop. Want to tell me what’s wrong?” Liz walked into the room wiping her hand furiously at her trousers. She sat down on the small bed beside Mathew. “Did you have a bad dream buddy?’

He nodded making little whimpering noises.

“Want me to lie with you?” she asked.

He nodded again continuing to whimper. She grabbed a picture book from the book shelf and lay down beside him. The night light was so bright she could see the pages clearly.

“I don’t like that book,” he said snuggling into her chest.

“Don’t you?” she looked up and saw Max in the doorway. He grabbed another book and brought it over for them. Squatting by the side of the bed he said, “What about this one Mathew?”

He nodded. “Who are you?”

“My names Max,” he said holding his hand out. “Nice to meet you.”

“I want you to read me the book,” he said.

Liz got up. “He’s all yours.” While they were reading she hurried off to the bathroom to wash her hands and freshen up. She looked at her reflection in the mirror wondering what she had been so scared of before. She was definitely recovering, now she couldn’t wait to do all kinds of things to Max to bring him pleasure. She grinned at the thought. How exciting.

>>>>>>>>>

[nicola]

Chapter twenty-five

“Oh wow!” Liz exclaimed. “Is there anything this place doesn’t have?” she walked around the large lounge area. “This place is huge.”

“That’s what Isabel said,” Max said and laughed.

“Max, do you hear me? Wow!” she walked up to him. “You are so lucky!”

His face became serious. “Liz,” he spoke, “I was hoping that maybe we’d both be lucky.”

She frowned. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, I want you to move in with me,” he answered. “Before you reply, let me say this—”

“Yes,” she said cutting him off. “I will move in with you Max. Of course I will.”

“You will?” he asked surprised. He thought she would take some convincing.

“I would move in with you if you were living in a pit Max. I would give up a mansion to live on the street with you.” She threw her arms around his neck. “I love you Max, that’s what I do.” She smiled brightly. “Oh this is going to be so wonderful.”

Max hugged her tightly against him burying his face in her hair and wondering what he did to deserve her.

>>>>>>>>

“You asked her to move in with you but you didn’t ask her to marry you?” Michael asked. “Why?”

“It didn’t seem like the right moment,” Max said. He sunk back into his chair and watched his mother fluff around the kitchen with Isabel.

“So when will it be the ‘right’ moment?” he asked and sipped his beer.

“I don’t know,” Max answered. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

Michael shrugged and called to the kitchen, “Is dinner nearly ready?”

“Yes Michael! Ten minutes,” Diane called back.

“Ten minutes!” Michael cried. “That’s ages.”

Max rolled his eyes and got up. On his way to the bathroom he noticed his mom had put a picture of him and Liz up in the hallway with the rest of the family photos. He stopped in mid step and stared at it—it had been taken on one of the nights she had come around for dinner. They were outside because Philip was at the barbecue and Diane had sent Max out to make sure he didn’t kill himself. In the picture Liz was sitting on Isabel’s child hood swing that hung from a tree at the back of the yard. He was leaning against the trunk and they were laughing. He couldn’t remember what about.

He took it down and walked into the kitchen. “Where did this come from?” he asked dumbly.

“I took it,” Diane said. “Didn’t it turn out lovely?”

“Oh it did!” Isabel rushed over to look at it. “I remember when you took that. When did you get the film developed? I want to look at the photos I took last Sunday.”

“They are on the computer table in Max’s room,” Diane said and wiped her dough covered hands on her plastic apron. “I made two copies. There are some other ones of Liz if you want them Max. I’m sure Isabel doesn’t want them.”

Max shrugged and sat down at the kitchen table still staring at the photo. In his opinion the photo was not a good one. Liz may have been laughing but it was one of those times when she had sadness in her eyes—when she was remembering. He did not want her to see this photo. “Can you put a different one up?” he asked.

“What?” Diane asked. She took off her apron and poured herself a glass of red wine. “What’s wrong with that one?”

Max didn’t want to get into it. “Let me pick one?”

Diane sat down across from him. “Well okay…but I don’t see why that can’t be hung up.”

Isabel came back with the photos and soon they were sprawled out all over the table. The telephone rang and Max went to answer it.

“Hello?”

“Max, I’m sorry to say I can’t make it to dinner. Can you put your mother on?”

“Sure. Just a second. See you later?” Max asked.

“Yeah, I’ll try to be home as soon as I can.” Michael was sitting with Isabel when he got back.

He picked up a photo of Liz and waved it around in Max’s face. “Oh I’m Liz and I have Max wrapped around my little finger,” Michael teased with a bad imitation of Liz’s voice. “He’s so pussy whipped! Come little Maxie I need you to brush my hair.”

“Michael shut the hell up,” Max grabbed the photo off him. “Don’t be such an ass.”

“You are so immature Michael,” Isabel said. “When will you grow up?” Pause. “Who was on the phone?”

“Dad, he can’t make it home,” Max said. What was he going to do? Oh right, toilet.

“Where are you going?” Michael asked.

“To take a whiz, you have a problem with that?” Max shot him an annoyed look and left the room.

>>>>>>>>

Liz rubbed her eyes as she stumbled out of bed and across the room. She opened the door, tied the belt on her robe and tried to hold her hair out of her face.

“Liz…come with me,” Max said, grabbed her arm and tugged her along.

“Wha—? Max what the hell? It’s five am! Are you crazy? Where are you taking me? I’m in my pajamas!”

“Do you trust me?”

“You know I do.”

“Then come on.”

Liz followed Max down the stair case yawning into her hand the whole time. She wrapped her arms around herself as they walked towards her car. “You are mad,” she kept muttering. “Why? Why?”

In his car she turned on the car heater and warmed her hands. Still he refused to tell her anything.

“Max,” she whined. “You’ve pulled me out of bed, the least you can do is tell me where you are taking me.”

“What does it matter?” he grinned.

They sat in silence for a few moments. Before Liz asked, “Hey how was dinner at your parents?” She tucked her feet under her thighs to keep warm.

“Michael was being an ass. I needed you there to keep me sane.”

Liz smiled. “What did he do now?”

“Be himself,” Max said. “How was—”

“The convention went wonderful,” Liz spoke before he got a chance to. “I actually felt like I belonged there you know? Everyone was friendly and the presentation went wonderful. Everything was just…wonderful. Did I say that already?”

Max laughed. “Just twice.”

She turned her body so she was facing him.

“I’m glad you liked the convention. Was Rick there?”

“It’s strange to hear you call him that - to me it’s always ‘Professor Hart.’ And yes he was there.” She covered his hand on the gear stick with her own. “You okay?”

“Fine, just…grumpy I guess.”

“Yes,” Liz said and smiled. “Well perhaps 5am joy rides are just a one time thing?”

Max clutched her hand tightly. “Perhaps.”

They drove for five minutes before arriving at their destination. “We’re here,” Max stated the obvious.

“Where is here?” she asked.

“Do you see that?” he motioned for her to look out the window. The early morning sun was rising up on the horizon shining on the ripples in the water.

She nodded. “Is this what you brought me here for?” she did not look pleased.

He rolled his eyes at her. “Spoil sport, get out of the car.” He reached into the back and grabbed two blankets before following her. She was shivering in the cold.

“Max! As thoughtful and beautiful as this is, I’m fr-fr-fr-freezing.” Her teeth chattered.

Being the attentive boyfriend he was Max wrapped one of the blankets and his arm around Liz. They walked down the boat deck to the end and he spread out the spare blanket on the ground. They sat, Max with his legs dangling over the side and Liz with her legs crossed under her. It was too cold to take off their shoes and dip their feet in.

“Isn’t it stunning?” Max asked. He wrapped his arm around her and she rested her head on his shoulder. Her eyes drifted shut. She wanted to sleep.

Max kissed the top of her head and swung his feet back and forth under the deck. With the ginger gold seeping its way across the earth Max told his partner a story. “Once upon a time in a land where money is the high power and people seem to be all for themselves…”

“Charming,” Liz whispered.

Max chuckled. “There was a russet girl that could light up a cosmos with her smile. She had everything to live with but it seemed, nothing to live for—Liz?”

“Don’t stop, I’m listening. This young woman, did she realize there was something to live for? You are an awfully disheartening teller of tales Mr. Evans.”

“Wait, there’s a happy ending.” He cleared his throat. Liz’s eyes remained closed. Her nose was numb and red in the frost. “She sat at her windowsill and waited for clarification, a way out from the chaos. When, in the strangest, most unexpected place she met a boy as russet and brooding as she was. They were both lost. They didn’t have that one thing that made their hearts light. Fortunately for them both the male was very bright”—Liz chuckled insultingly—“and knew instantly that this girl was the missing piece to his puzzle to happiness.” Max rubbed her arm up and down lovingly. “It took her a little while longer—”

Liz smacked him. “Rude!”

“Let me finish!” He turned his gaze away from the sun to press his forehead to her hair. He closed his eyes. “The girl took a little while longer but with good reason. The boy raged against his fate and eventually everything worked out, they were living in the cherry earth but suddenly it wasn’t so dismal because—”

“They were together?”

“Every day was a blessing and they knew it.” Max heard her deep breathing. Liz opened her eyes and shifted so she was looking at him. He continued holding her stare, “So they lived life, having their deserved happily ever after. Their horror seemed another life away, being with her healed his wounds, being adored by him made her feel gorgeous again. Being together in Boston disintegrated the bad. On a cold morning the boy asked the girl to marry him.”

“And?”

“What?” Max smiled. “There’s an and after that?”

“What was the girls reply?” Liz asked.

“She said yes,” Max answered. He rubbed her arms up and down. “And they watched the sunrise.”

“Are you asking?” she asked.

“Are you saying yes?”

“Yes,” they both said in unison.

>>>>>>>

Isabel stood at the counter in the library tapping her foot impatiently. The librarian was ignoring her—she just knew it! The stupid bitch! Isabel tapped her foot louder. Finally, “Hello?”

“Yes, hello,” Isabel said aggravated. “I’ve been waiting for five minutes.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t see you.” The girl was obviously a student.

“Like hell you didn’t,” Isabel muttered.

“Pardon?”

“Oh, nothing.” Isabel said. “I was wondering if you could tell me where to find—”

“That’s not my job,” the girl said. “Ask Susan, she’s over near the computers. She’ll help you.”

“But—” The girl walked away and ignored her.

Swearing under her breath, Isabel turned around and scanned the room for this ‘Susan’ woman. When she didn’t see her she muttered to herself, “Some one needs to yank out the broom stick from her ass.”

“Hey, you’re Isabel?”

Isabel turned around. “You’re Liz’s friend?”

“Maria, I’m Maria. What are you doing here?”

“Michael wants this book picked up for him but I’m late for this thing and—”

Maria perked up. “Michael? I can get it for him if you like.”

“Oh would you?” Isabel asked. She was surprised by the girl’s kindness. “That would be a big help.”

“Yeah sure, I’ve got nothing else to do. Max and Liz are in our dorm ‘celebrating their engagement’ if you know what I mean. Can’t go back there.” Maria shrugged. “What is it he needed?”

“Something- something- chemistry?” Isabel said. “Oh shit I can’t remember.”

“I’m sure I can find it, don’t worry. Where is he? Where can I take it?” she asked.

Isabel told her, and then ran off out of the library calling out a thank you as she went. Maria got out three chemistry books and walked towards Michael’s dorm with a silly grin on her face.

When she knocked on the door Michael called, “Who is it?”

“Uh, I have your chemistry book—hi!” Maria was shocked by the door suddenly being flung open.

“Who are you?”

It was nice to know he’d thought of her too. “Maria…Liz’s friend?”

“Oh yeah,” he muttered.

“I brought your book…” she said. “Isabel had to do something.”

“Typical,” Michael said. “I mean of her…thanks for the books.” He took them off her. “I actually only needed this one.”

“I wasn’t sure of which one so I just got them all.”

He nodded. They were silent for a second. “You wanna come in?”

“Sure,” she said and shrugged.

>>>>>>>

Chapter Twenty-six.

“Can’t you just do it?” Liz asked. “Please?”

Max shook his head. “Sorry.”

“But she’s going to freak,” Liz said. She buried her face in his shoulder and huffed.

“Well you could put it off another two weeks if you’d like,” Max offered. Diane walked passed the couch and glanced at the two of them sitting on the couch.

“Still haven’t called?” she mouthed to Max. He nodded.

“Liz,” she said. “Your mothers going to be happy for you! Why are you so worried?”

“You don’t know my mother.” Liz sighed and got up off the couch. “I need a drink.” Max watched television while he waited for her to return.

“Can we go out?”

Max turned his head in her direction. She leaned against the door frame with water in her hand. “Where do you want to go?” he asked.

She shrugged. “Dunno.”

He motioned her over and she came leisurely and sat on her legs next to him. “You have to do it some time,” he said.

“I know,” she mumbled and put her glass on the coffee table. “Max, if you were my mother and I told you I was going to marry a guy she’d never met but seen once—in jail! What would you say?”

“Do I have to imagine I’m your mother?” he looked perplexed. When she didn’t say anything he grabbed her. “Liz if you aren’t ready maybe we shouldn’t…”

“NO!” she cried. “No! Max don’t think that, my mother has nothing to do with us. I’m just a wimp!” Pause. “Hand me the phone.”

Max grinned to himself and handed her the phone. With a nervous sigh Liz dialed the number and waited. Then hanged up.

“Maybe I can write her a letter? Letters are good,” she said.

“How do you think your mothers going to react to a letter?” Max asked.

She dialed the number again and this time didn’t hang up because her mother picked up. “Hello, Nancy Parker speaking.”

“Mom!” Liz said. “Hi.”

“Liz! Hi darling, what a surprise. How are you?”

“I’m…good,” Liz said. “Mom I have some, ah, news.”

There was silence on the other end and then, “Has something happened?”

“No,” Liz said. “Actually everything is wonderful, I have good news.” Max wrapped his arms around her and pressed his mouth to her neck. She smelt like vanilla and lavender. He sighed happily.

“Oh well that’s great darling, what is it?”

“You know how I told you last month that I was seeing Max and…stuff?” Liz asked. Wow that was eloquent she thought. Max chuckled. “Well, we’ve decided to, ah, hmm…get married.”

Silence.

Oh, God.

“Pardon?” Nancy asked.

“We’ve decided to get married! Surprise!” Still Nancy said nothing. Nervously Liz mumbled, “Heh, you aren’t congratulating us…”

“Liz, are you pulling my chain?” Nancy asked. “Married? Don’t you think this is a little speedy?”

“No,” Liz answered. “Mom, I know this is the right thing to do. We both want it so much. If it didn’t happen now, it was gonna happen later.”

“Liz…”

“I know I’m only nineteen but I’m going to be twenty in a few months. You’re probably thinking that I have no idea what I’m doing and so on. But I do, I completely understand what I’m getting into and this is something I have to do. I want your blessing.”

“Your father is going to kill you.”

“But you’re not right? You’re happy for me?” Liz bit her bottom lip nervously.

“Happy is not the word I would use. Shocked, yes. Surprised, worried, apprehensive YES. Amazed, yes again.” Nancy was quiet for a moment. “I haven’t even met Max, Liz.”

“Well we were thinking maybe we could come back to Roswell for Christmas?” Liz asked. “We aren’t just going to run off and get married straight away, we thought maybe next year around March.”

Nancy sighed loudly. “It doesn’t sound like anything I say is going to make a difference. Liz, are you absolutely sure this is the right thing? Are you ABSOLUTELY sure?”

“Yes,” Liz answered without hesitation. “I am more then sure.”

“It’s just so soon!” Nancy said. “You’ve barely known each other for very long.”

“Well actually we’ve known each other for over eleven months,” Liz mumbled. “I know it doesn’t seem like much…”

“Liz…”

“Before you ask if I’m sure—again. I am just going to tell you, yes! Yes of course I’m sure. Mom, have I ever been the type to just jump into something? You know how much Max means to me.”

Max squeezed her hand and she smiled shyly at him.

“There are so many reasons for you to believe that this is a bad idea. Believe me, I have been fretting over what you’ll say for a couple of weeks and I’ve produced every possible scenario and every possible reply to everything you could possibly say. This is going to happen no matter what, you know how strong-headed I am when it comes to getting something I want.”

“Liz, do you hear me telling you no? I can’t tell you what to do anymore; you are old enough to make your own decisions. All I can do is help you decide if you are certain of what you want.”

“I am! I am certain of what I want.”

“Don’t get exasperated, do you hear me yelling? I’m just having a hard time digesting this all. I guess there are divorces if worst comes to worse…”

“Divorces?” Liz exclaimed. “Mom! How can you say that?”

“I just don’t want you to feel as if you are stuck at nineteen! You have so much life to live, why would you want to be tied down?”

“Tied down?” Liz asked. She was trying very hard to keep from yelling. “Tied down?”

“You are only just evolving into an adult Lizzie, you have many, many, many years to live.”

“Yes, I do, and I want to share them with Max,” Liz argued. “Don’t you think I have thought all of this through?”

“Well I don’t know… how often do you pick up a phone and ring me?”

“SO now you want me to call you more? What is this?” Liz asked. “I ring you often enough. How often do you ring me?”

“Not enough,” Nancy said shamefully. “Okay, okay so if I agree to this you’ll promise you’ll bring that boy down here for us to meet?”

“Yes,” Liz said and smiled. “You will get to meet him.”

“Hmm,” Nancy mumbled. “I have cookies in the oven, perhaps we should talk about this later?”

“Cookies more important than me mom?”

“Oh don’t be silly Liz, I just don’t want them to be wasted,” Nancy said. “I will ring you later, no doubt your father will want to speak to you.”

“I’ll look forward to it,” Liz replied sarcastically.

“Don’t be like that; give me a little while to think this all through. See you later.”

“Goodbye.”

“Love you,” Nancy said.

>>>>>>>

“I ran into Isabel and offered to take the books around to Michael for entirely selfish reasons.” Maria grinned. “Anyway I helped him study and afterwards he asked how he could repay me. I said a date would be nice and so we’re going out tomorrow night.”

“Wow,” Liz said. “Why do you always get what you want? If I wasn’t on cloud nine I would be so jealous.”

Maria smiled. “Yeah, well. I’m really excited! I haven’t been so excited about a date in ages.”

“Well I hope you have a good time,” Liz said. She sank back into her chair and played with her engagement ring.

“Do you realize you are fulfilling your childhood dream?” Maria asked.

Glancing at her Liz mumbled, “Huh?”

“You used to say you were going to find your soul mate at sixteen and run away with your mystery man.”

Liz laughed. “Yes, but I’m not sixteen.”

“Do you think Max is your ‘mystery man’?” Maria asked.

“I believe it with all my being,” Liz replied.

“Well maybe I’ve found mine too,” Maria said and smiled. For an instant Liz was shocked by her friend’s depth of infatuation with Michael Guerin.

“I’m so happy for you!” Liz said. “Where is he taking you?”

“I don’t know,” Maria answered.

“Trust you to go out with Max’s best friend though…couldn’t be anyone else could it?” They both got up from the dinning room table. They were at Liz’s Aunt and Uncles because Edna and Herby weren’t there. It was their anniversary and they were out to dinner celebrating nineteen ‘somewhat’ blissful years together. “I bet you will have a good time together,” Liz said.

“As good a time as you and Max the other night?”

Liz frowned. “Maria, what?”

“While I was helping Michael study, what were you and Max doing locked up in the dorm room all on your lonesome?”

“Nothing,” Liz blushed.

“You’re kidding right? Details—now? How many times do I have to ask?”

“We just did…stuff, okay?” Liz went deep red and threw herself back on the couch in front of the television.

“Like, what, exactly? How much clothing was removed?” Maria stood in front of the television with her hands on her hips so she could get all she could out of her friend.

“I don’t think that’s any of your business,” Liz replied. She threw a cushion at her to try and get her to move.

“Come on, tell me!” Maria whined.

Liz didn’t take much convincing. She would never admit to Maria, but she actually did want to talk about it…a little… “Okay, um, all of it.”

“WHAT?” Maria exclaimed. “You guys didn’t have sex did you? There is no way you can loose your virginity before me.”

“We didn’t have sex,” Liz cried. “We’re waiting until after the wedding. We did—a lot of other things instead.”

“Specifics?”

“No way, it’s private.”

“Okay so all I actually know is that you two were butt nakey in a room alone together, how adorable by the way.”

Liz rolled her eyes. “What? Why is that adorable?”

“Because it’s you two.”

“Well its not very often we get a chance to do ‘things’ alone together. We are always getting interrupted.”

“Well it’s nice to know you’re getting better,” Maria said.


Chapter Twenty-seven

“Maria, you don’t mind me moving out do you?” Liz was nibbling on a piece of pizza and talking on the phone. She was waiting for Max to get home from work.

“Nah, you were a burden anyway, I always had to check I wasn’t walking in on you and lover-boy,” Maria answered. “Don’t worry. I’ll be fine. They’ll probably find me a new room mate in a week.”

Liz crossed her legs under herself. “You think?”

“Yeah,” Maria replied. “I won’t have you to take me to your Aunts for breakfast anymore though.”

“Oh what a shame, you’ll have to walk.”

The front door opened and Max strolled in and took off his jacket and hung it up on the coat rack. He scratched behind his ear and kicked off his shoes. Liz wondered how many times in the rest of her life she would see him do that. Without saying anything he strolled up to her, kissed her forehead, patted her hair and then headed into the kitchen. She rolled her eyes and tried to focus on what Maria was saying.

“Liz? Hello? Ah—HELL-o?” Maria said. “He’s home isn’t he? Oh that’s a shocker. I’ll talk to you later?”

“See ya Maria.” She hanged up and tossed the phone down on the couch. “Max?”

In the kitchen he was standing at the fridge surveying his possible dinners. Liz walked up to him and wrapped her arms around him. “Tired?”

He nodded and replied, “Yeah. Are my parent’s home?”

“Yeah, upstairs.” Liz knew he hated his job; he constantly complained about it and told her he would rather be at the hospital. Smiling she said, “Only four more years and you’ll have your PHD.”

He groaned. “Don’t remind me.”

“Are you too tired to start moving in?”

“Give me half an hour,” he replied. “Do you want something to eat?”

“No, I already ate.” She studied his face. “Hey, cheer up.”

He forced a dreary smile.

“Oh, jee great attempt,” she said and laughed. “Come on, I’ll make it worth your while.”

“Ohhhh, you will?” he perked up. “How?”

She leaned up and kissed his lips teasingly. “I think you know how—”

“That’s wasting power,” Philip grunted as he walked past them. Max shut the refrigerator door and stepped closer to Liz. “Hi, to you to,” he said.

“Sorry,” Philip replied. “Hard day.”

“Ditto.” Max wrapped his arms around Liz’s waist and picked her up. Nodding to his father he said, “Excuse us, we’re going to my room. Liz is going to make it better.”

Diane heard and grimaced. “Son, there are some things you don’t share with your parents.”

Max laughed as he walked down the hallway. Liz demanded he put her down, her face was bright red. “You are so embarrassing.”

“What, me? No.”

When they reached his old room he carried her over to the bed and then went back to close the door.

“Max, I am not doing anything with you when your parents are just downstairs.” She brushed her shirt and got up off the bed. “Besides, you said we could start moving in today.”

“I don’t want to move, yet…” he tackled her back down onto the bed and held her under him. “Soon we can move but not at this very second.”

“There is a lot to be done,” Liz argued. She struggled to get away but she was no match for him. Her mind flashed with remembrance and she shuddered. Max noticed the look in her face and got up.

“Sorry,” he said.

Liz smiled and forced all the memories away. “I knew I’d win. Let’s go.”

Max was confused. Had she faked it or had she meant it? He decided he did not want to know and followed her out of the room. She was wearing the jeans, the ones that were tight on her ass… He wrapped his arms around her back and pressed himself into her. “Whose place first, boss?”

“Yours,” she answered.

He kissed her neck and reluctantly let go. “I can’t believe we are moving when we could be doing other things.”

Liz grinned. “Maybe we could move the bed first?”

He loved this new confidence in their relationship. “Oh of course.”

>>>>>>

Maria spun around in circles in the middle of Max and Liz’s new apartment. “Two days, two days,” she chanted to herself.

Liz walked past with a big box in her hands. “Maria? I thought you said you were going to help?”

“I am helping!”

Max frowned. “How is that—?”

Liz shook her head at him. “It’s best not to try.”

“Two days and I’ll be home in Roswell in my own bedroom with my old bed!” Maria squealed. She was getting more excited by the second. “My moms store and the Crashdown… I have missed it all so much. I just can not wait.”

“Oh Max you have to try a Galaxy Sub at the Crashdown, they are just so good,” Liz said. “Mmm it makes me hungry just thinking about it.”

“Oh hell, do not talk about galaxy subs or I might just kill you!” Maria said. “I want one sooo bad.”

“I’ve wanted one since we left Roswell,” Liz commented.

Max smirked. “You mean I’ll finally get to see the infamous alien uniform you hate so much?” he dropped the box he was carrying onto the carpet. “I’ll make it my mission to get you both to wear it again.”

Maria and Liz shot each other a look of horror. “No way, you’ll never get me in that thing again,” Maria said.

“Do you want to make a bet? Fifty bucks you’ll be it within the first week.” Max didn’t know how he’d do it but he knew he could not go through his life without seeing Liz in her aqua-colored uniform.

“You’re on,” Liz and Maria said at the same time.

>>>>>>>

Liz spread her hands out flat on her thighs and stared at her nails in concentration. Her mother had always been very fussy with the cleanness and tidiness of her fingernails. As a young child Liz somehow picked up on that characteristic.

Max grinned at her. “What are you doing?”

Not taking her eyes off her hands Liz replied, “Grooming myself.”

“Oh, of course. Thank you for reminding me—I have to as well,” Max teased.

Liz eyed him scornfully. “Max—no never mind, you wouldn’t understand.” Max had always had clean, attractive hands. How he managed it without caring was beyond Liz.

He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and tugged her closer. “You aren’t…nervous are you?” he asked.

Liz let out a dry laugh. “Oh right, of what? My own parents—that’s silly.”

Max knew her well, he wasn’t convinced. “I’m the one who’s supposed to be nervous.”

“I am not nervous.”

Max eyed her skeptically.

“Okay so maybe I am,” she admitted softly. “Just a little bit. I’m afraid they’ll embarrass me in front of you and you’ll just run off in horror.”

Max laughed loudly. “Sweetheart, I am not running off anywhere.”

Liz nibbled on her bottom lip.

“I promise,” Max added.

Maria snorted in her sleep next to them. They both chuckled.

Liz curled further into him and tucked her feet under her bottom. “I’m sorry for my insecurities,” she said.

“I have’em too,” Max said. “Love you.”

“I love you,” Liz replied and smiled when he kissed the top of her head. They were quiet for the rest of the train ride. Max closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep while Liz could not so she just stared out at the passing towns and fields. She was feeling some lack of self-confidence about arriving back in the town where she’d left all her horrors behind. As far as she knew she’d get there and everything would be fine. Whereas it could be the complete opposite. For the last couple of months she’d been on a steady run towards success but now…she felt herself hesitating. She’d just have to wait and see what happened. Thinking optimistically, she shrugged her concerns away and smiled to herself.

When they finally arrived it was late at night and they all just wanted to leave the station and fall onto a comfortable bed somewhere. Amy Deluca and Liz’s father were there to greet them.

“This must be Max,” Amy said grinning and nudging Liz suggestively. “I see what all the fuss was about.”

Max blushed. Jeff, however, was not as welcoming. He was hospitable, but…hesitant. “It’s nice to finally meet you,” he said and held his hand out.

Max shook it sternly. “My thoughts exactly. It’s great to be here.”

Jeff seemed pleased by his reply.

Maria and Amy had their arms around one another. Liz asked where her mom was.

“At home,” Jeff said. “Baking a welcome home cake.”

Liz rolled her eyes. “She’s just never out of the kitchen is she?”

“Well, no, you know how she is. It was nice to see you again Maria, I trust we’ll see a lot of you over the break. See you later Amy.”

“Bye!” came her high pitched reply.

There was an interrogation in the car on the way home. ‘So where do you two plan to be living?”

“We ah, have an apartment dad,” Liz answered. “It’s really nice…near the hospital Max hopes to be employed eventually.”

“Ah, a doctor then?” Jeff asked.

“Yes, sir,” Max replied.

“Well do you have a job to bring in some money while you’re getting your PhD?”

“Yes, sir.”

Liz stifled a laugh and wrapped her fingers around her boyfriends arm. “You aren’t in the army and my father is not your sergeant,” she reminded him.

Max smirked. “Yeah, I know…”

When they got to the house Nancy greeted them both warmly and happily. “Max, I have to say…I was a little bit freaked, so to speak, about you and Liz to begin with but I want you to know I fully support you. Don’t mind Jeff he’s just old and cranky.” Leaning over she whispered in her daughters ear, “He can’t sleep in your room, you hear me? You’re father will hit the roof!”

Liz sighed. “Fine.”

Once her parents had gone to bed Liz showed Max her room. “My mom said you had to sleep on the couch, I’m sorry—”

“Don’t worry,” Max said.

“You sure?”

“Yeah, I kind of figured I’d have to. Hoped I wouldn’t have to but knew I would nevertheless…” he kissed her sweetly. “See you in the morning.”

He was just walking out when Liz called out to him, “Max.”

He turned to look at her. “Hmm?”

‘She never said anything about me sleeping in the lounge with you.”

They laughed together. “Are you sure?” Max asked.

“I’ll get up early.”

>>>>>>>

“You know I feel as if this is my final step towards recovery,” Liz told Maria. They were sitting at a booth in the Crashdown eating Galaxy subs. Max was in the bathroom.

“Really?” Maria asked. “You mean…?”

Liz smiled brightly. “Being back here…it reminds me of you know? And the best part of it is – I’m not freaking out about that at all.”

Maria stopped eating. “Are you serious? You think you’re finally…”

“Yes,” Liz said. “There are just two more things I need to do.”

“Oh?” Maria asked. “And what would that be?”

“One”—Liz checked around her to make sure no one was listening—“Is to take the final step with Max.”

Maria squealed and clapped her hands together once in glee. “I knew that would be one. That’s a major step Liz…”

“Oh I am just so ready, if you know what I mean?” Liz asked and winked her eye once.

Maria doubled over. “Oh I know, trust me.” Out of the corner of her eye she saw Max come out of the bathroom. “Quick, tell me the other.”

“Two,” Liz said. “Is to go for a run.”

“Huh?”

“You know, by myself…to the spot.”

Maria swallowed. “You think that’s a good idea?”

Liz nodded. “Definitely.”

Max slumped down into the booth and wrapped his arm around Liz. “Definitely what?”

Liz grinned and kissed his lips. “Definitely enjoying this sub.”

Jeff walked up to the table. “Girls…I know you just got here and I am so sorry but…would you be able to work tonight? Cynthia just cancelled and I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t absolutely have to. Would you, please? You still have your old uniforms out the back for you to wear.”

Max grinned when they both agreed reluctantly. “Pay up girls,” he said holding his hand out. “Fifty bucks.”

“That’s not fair; you didn’t do anything to get us into it!” Maria cried.

Max laughed. “I don’t care, the fact is…you’ll be wearing them, therefore I win. Hand it over.”

Grudgingly the two girls handed over twenty-five dollars each.

“I hate you,” Liz said.

“No you don’t,” Max replied and captured her lips. “You love me.”

Twenty-Eight

“Max! I’m home,” Liz exclaimed and grinned. “Do you have any idea how cool it is to say that?” When there was no reply she frowned. “Max?”

“In here!”

She smiled and headed towards the bedroom. “Have you eaten?” she asked. He was stretched out lazily on her bed watching the rain outside.

“Nah,” he answered. “I was waiting for you.”

“Why are you lying in the near dark?” she climbed onto the bed next to him and snuggled into his side like a little kitten.

“Felt like it,” he answered and kissed her forehead. “Did you and Maria close up okay?”

“Hmm,” she purred and pressed her lips to his neck. “She went on and on about loosing that fifty-dollars to you all night.”

He laughed. “Good.”

“My parents’ car isn’t outside. Where are they?”

“I don’t know, they left a note…said they’d be back late.” Max was silent for a moment. “Found out something interesting tonight…Maria told me that you planned to go back to the…you know spot.”

Liz sighed. “She wasn’t supposed to tell you. So, what?”

“So, what?” Max’s voice raised a notch. “You aren’t going.”

She sat up and looked down at his face in the dark. “Yes I am. Max you are smart, I don’t think I have to tell you why I want to do this.”

“I know why,” he said. “But Liz…there must be something else you can do. It’s not safe.”

“It is safe and that’s why I’m doing it. To prove it to myself.” She caressed his cheeks. “I hadn’t originally…I was originally going to go by myself but…what if, you come with me?”

Max nodded. “Yes, of course I’ll go with you.”

“Okay,” Liz said and lay back down. They were silent for a few minutes until Liz said shyly, “You know what the other thing I need to do is? Did Maria tell you that much?”

Max was thoughtful. “No, she only said that. Why, what else is there? Oh God, it’s not something crazy is it?”

Liz leaned over him and switched her bedside light on. “No, it’s not crazy,” she said and swallowed. “Max, you know how you’ve always planned to wait for marriage?”

His countenance changed as he came to gradual understanding. “Yes?”

She climbed onto of him and pressed her forehead to his. “Does it count if you’re engaged? We both plan to spend the absolute rest of our lives together…does it matter if we don’t wait until we sign a piece of paper?” she heard his sharp intake of breath. “I want you to know I feel completely at ease.”

“Liz…”

She grinned and kissed his lips. “Let me have my dirty way with you,” she teased.

He laughed.

“It’s only natural. Can I help it if I want to?”

More laughs. “Stop, before I die,” he said. “Liz, are you sure you’re ready? Wait, never mind, you sound more than ready.”

“I am,” she responded. “Aren’t you? I want to feel that new closeness with you.”

“I want that too,” he said. “You know what I thought when we were first meeting?”

“What did you think?” she asked. “In prison?”

“Yes”—shudder—“In prison. I thought- are you listening?”

“I’m listening,” she said.

“I thought: if she isn’t the one, then why does my heart tell me she is? With every part of my fiber, I was so convinced that was the end of life for me. I thought that because of our situation that it was so obvious we didn’t belong together.”

“There was no way anything could have happened to you Max. You have too good a heart. The world would be less not to have it.”

“As it would be hell without you,” he said. “Liz…”

“It’s okay, you can tell me.”

“Besides running into your attacker the night before…did you, before then, believe I was innocent?”

“I think I knew it from the first second I saw you Max,” Liz said. “How else would I have been so brave to come and see you every chance I got? You have no idea the hell I was put through trying to convince myself of that. I wish I could have gotten you out sooner. I was just so confused.”

“I’m out now,” he said. “It’s been a year.”

“We’re both doing good right?”

“We’re both doing good Liz,” he said.

“I love you Max.”

“I love you too. With all my heart.”

After she’d locked the door and walked towards the stereo to put on some quiet music she stood in front of him. He was grinning.

“What?” she asked.

“That uniform…” he said and laughed. “I like it very much.”

“Like how?” she asked. He just continued to grin. “Eh, Max, how could you…?”

He tucked his hands behind his head. “What can I say? It’s cute. Tell me…do those buttons undo as easily as they look?”

“Why don’t you just find that out for yourself?”

Max’s eyes glowed. “Right now?” she knew what he meant and she was certain of her answer.

“When else? Of course.” She climbed onto the bed and straddled his hips.

Unable to resist, and because he didn’t have to stop, Max scrunched his hands on either side of her uniform and pulled—unsnapping all the little clasps. “Ah…I see,” he said. “Quite effortless, isn’t it?”

She leaned down and passionately kissed his mouth. “Ah huh,” she mumbled.

“Very convenient.”

“Very…”

>->->->->->

Not a single patch of her body was left free from caresses. Not a single spot was Max-free. That’s how she wanted it. Needed it. He touched every pleasurable piece of territory and then massaged every bad memory away. Unlike how she had anticipated she had no off-putting moments of reminiscence. Only on that opening swift thrust did she think with sadness that he was not the one to tear her open for the first time.

“How did we do, you think?” Liz asked as she lay afterwards in his arms.

Max smiled. “I think we did pretty good.” They rolled their heads to look at one another.

Laughing with him, she agreed, “I think we did pretty good too.”

They were silent for a moment.

“Now what?”

“Now we spend the rest of our lives doing just that,” Max answered.

“Just that,” Liz repeated. “You know, I think that sounds like a plan.”

“I think so too.”

They kissed softly and when Max pulled away he stared into her eyes intently.

“What?” she asked.

“Your scars are fading.” It used to be so obvious she had been wounded.

She touched his nose with her forefinger. “You’ve healed me, partner.”

>->->->->->

“This is it,” Liz stood next to the road staring around her.

“This is it,” Max repeated. He was holding her hand tightly in his.

“Huh,” Liz sighed.

Max looked around. He felt a chill crawl down his spine knowing what had taken place here.

“I feel nothing.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Hmm,” she said and smiled. “He can’t hurt me anymore, you know?”

“I know.” He smiled back.

“Let’s go home.”

“Okay.”

Hand-in-hand they headed back down the highway with the sun on their backs.

“I think we should have lots of babies,” Max said.

Liz laughed. “I think we should too.”

“We’ll save a puck load of money on doctor’s.”

“Isn’t it wonderful?” Liz said. “Hey, I was thinking—let’s set Isabel and Alex up.”

Max stared at her incredulously. “Are you kidding? She’d squash him.”

“Nah, she’s got a soft heart,” Liz argued. “Hey.”

“Yeah?”

“My Grandmother always used to tell me that no matter what happened in life, no matter how sad and how sinister things got, fate always made up for it in one way or another.”

“Yeah?”

She didn’t need to finish, he knew what she was saying.

They turned to each other and smiled.

“I think you are going to be just fine,” he said.

“I think so too.”

THE END