Always Waiting ... (UC,Z/E, ADULT) Ch 46 - AN 6/27/04 {WIP}

[Realistic Dreamer]

Title: Always Waiting for Someone Else ... a Dupe's Story
Author: Realistic Dreamer
Catagory: UC - Zan/Elise
Rating: ADULT
Disclaimer: You know the drill, I know the drill, we all know the drill, but I'll repeat it anyway. I don't own them. If I did, I would have treated them much better. They're owned by JK, KKB, JF, UPN and anyone else who has their finger in the Roswell pie, but it certainly isn't me.

Summary: I have an idea about where I want this to go, but I'm not too sure about the journey from here to there. This is the story of Zan and Elise. Just think DupeLiz here. I'm not a firm believer in offering Liz up like she was the baked ham entree on the Easter buffet. Max has his soulmate and Zan has one too. But, they are not the same girl. Besides, I don't think either guy is into sharing all that much. And one more thing ... I couldn't do the New York talk if I tried, so I'm not going to. I also want to mention that one reason I chose Elise is reading Cookieman1234's wonderful fic "Finding Yourself." I just fell in love with the name.

Link to previous chapters: http://www.roswellfanatics.net/archive/ ... /5068.html

My most sincere apologies, Gentle Readers, both for being gone for so long and for the length of the chapter. The usual real life problems, plus a slight case of writer's block is my only explanation.

The chapter that follows is rather transitionary. If you are kind enough to leave feedback, I have a question I'd like your response to. When I first wrote this, I hadn't really thought about it much past the idea of coming up with another scenario for Zan ending up underneath that truck, dead. I've accomplished that, which leads to the question I'm going to pose. I could probably end this fairly quickly. If I go with the idea of Zan following Elise back home, I could be done with it. Or, I could write a whole lot about the life they'll lead. There are loose ends anyway, such as Elise's adoptive status. It won't be as exciting, but it would be fun to write.

So, my question is ... should I continue this? Will you be bored, since it's not really life-threatening, and the alien stuff will be revealed gradually? I'll keep going if the interest is there ...








Chapter 41

The insistent ringing in Elise's ear made her roll over, away from Zan's warmth, and slap her hand down on her alarm clock. She hit it again a little harder when the ringing continued. When the ringing still didn't stop, it finally dawned on her that it was her phone. Her hand fumbled on the nightstand, pushing the alarm clock away, before she located the handset. Squinting in the morning light, she found the talk button and pushed it, uttering a muffled greeting.

"Hey Lisa, it's Mom," her mother's cheerful voice came thru.

"What time is it?" Elise mumbled.

"7:00. More than time for you to be up and about. I've got the boys up and they're dressed for school and eating breakfast," her mom said.

In the background Elise could hear the complaints from her brothers.

"How come she's still in bed?" Matthew's voice sounded aggrieved.

"Lisa's still sleepin'? That's not fair," Mikey was outraged.

"Hush. You know that she's been busy taking care of her friend. She earned some sleeping-in time," her mother was momentarily distracted.

"Tell them I said I'm going back to bed as soon as we're done talking," Elise grinned.

"Ha, ha." her mother said. "Are you awake and alert and everything? We need to talk. There's been a slight change of plans. I won't be coming to pick you up, but you are still getting your butt home, so here's the deal. I called the bus company in New York, and I got you two tickets to Houghton. You leave tomorrow at noon. You'll be riding all night and you should be here in town by about 8:00 on Wednesday night."

"What's wrong?" Elise's voice was concerned.

Zan had been lying next to her, quietly coming awake at the sound of her voice. When he heard the sudden fearfulness, he turned and propped himself up on his elbow. Elise looked at him and shrugged her shoulders, indicating that she wasn't sure what was up yet. Zan rubbed his hand up and down her arm in a soothing gesture, and she gave him a small smile of appreciation before turning her attention back to her conversation.

"Remember I told you that Daddy was out of town? He went to visit Grandma," her mother told her.

Elise's paternal grandmother lived in Duluth, Minnesota. It's where her father was born and lived most of his young life. When her dad was about to enter high school, his father got a job in Houghton, so they moved. It's where Elise's mother and father met and got married. Her grandmother liked it there well enough, but missed Duluth, so when her husband died, she moved back. It was where her sisters were, and she wanted to be close to them again. Elise's family usually went to visit Grandma as often as they could, and always before a holiday. This year, because of commitments, her father went alone.

"Daddy said that Grandma isn't doing too well. She can't live alone anymore, it's just too much for her to handle and she's not getting around that well. So he isn't back yet. He's spending the next few days looking into an assisted-living home. He tried to convince her to come live with us, but you know how Grandma is about being close to her sisters. Daddy thinks there might be an opening in the place where one of them lives now ... Aunt Ida. So, he's still there, and I can't leave the boys," her mom sounded momentarily exasperated. "There's no way I'll take them on that long car ride to New York and back. I'll end up insane by the time we get back here."

Elise snickered as she agreed with her mother. She loved her brothers dearly, but their endless chatter and the fights that they occasionally got into were bad enough at home. Being trapped in a car with it for miles and miles would drive her mom crazy. Zan lay back against the pillows again, encouraged by Elise's laughter, and the fact that her expression had lightened considerably. Whatever it was, it wasn't devastating news.

"Daddy will be coming home on Wednesday, so he'll be here in time for Thanksgiving. He's bringing Grandma so she can celebrate with us. Then, on Friday, he's going to take her back to the home, and I'm going along. We're going to spend the long weekend packing up the house. Daddy thinks that it would be a good idea to rent it out, since it's free and clear. The income would help with paying for the assisted-living home," her mother laid out all the plans. "That means you'll be in charge. Think you can handle it?"

"Piece of cake," Elise said. "I can ride herd on the guys, no problem."

"Don't you go into slave-driver mode," her mom warned.

"Under my thumb ..." Elise sang the refrain from the old Rolling Stones tune.

Zan grinned as she snuggled closer to him, laying her head on his shoulder and tilting her head back to smile up at him. He started tracing idle circles on her collarbone, his finger dipping below the neck of her tank top. Elise's smile faltered as she bit her lip. His gaze held her trapped and she was rapidly losing track of her conversation as she became lost in his eyes.

"So, I'm depending on you to take care of things while I'm gone, and not to run roughshod over your brothers," her mother's voice came from a distance.

"Yeah, Mom, I'll behave," Elise said, inwardly amused at the irony of what she was saying out loud while Zan's warm hand was skimming the curve from her breast to her hip.

"You'd better. Anyway, I have to go and finish getting the boys ready for school. I'll see you when you get here. Remember, the bus leaves at noon tomorrow. Don't you dare miss it," her mother warned.

"Not a chance, Mom," Elise responded, as she continued to lose herself in Zan's heated stare. "Bye," her voice was faint.

Elise automatically pushed the talk button to disconnect the call, before allowing the handset to fall to the floor. She turned onto her side facing him, pulling away just a bit as she propped herself up on her elbow. Zan lay on his back, his hand slowly moving from her side, tracing her ribs before gently brushing her breast. His eyes darkened as he watched her nipple instantly harden, grazing his thumb over it.

"I've really missed this," he breathed.

"Yeah," Elise nodded, her voice throaty.

She reached out to touch his cheek. It was so wonderful to be able to see his eyes again, even if one of them was ringed with bruising. At least the swelling had gone down, and it was no longer quite so tender. His ribs were the same ... lots of colorful bruises, but not as sore.

"Zan," Elise moistened her suddenly dry lips with her tongue, "are you sure about this?"

She could feel her breathing becoming erratic and her heart was starting to pound. She had snuggled with him at night, as close as she could get without hurting him. It was satisfying to an extent, but they had just started to explore the mysteries of the physical relationship between the two of them, before the attempt on Zan's life. Now that he was feeling better, Elise could feel the desire she had for him start to skyrocket. While she told herself that she didn't want to rush him, she really had this flat-out need to jump his bones.

"More than sure," he replied as his hand moved under her tank top. He cupped her breast in his warm palm, his lips quirking into that lopsided smile when she leaned into his hand, her eyes fluttering closed.

Elise could feel how much he needed this ... not only how life-affirming their coming together would be, but also how necessary a reassurance it would be that her feelings for him hadn't changed. That she hadn't been scared off by how dangerous his life could be. That she wasn't put off by the sheer alienness of what happened. She knew all that was in his heart, understood how off-balance he was after everything that he'd gone thru.

She opened her eyes to look down at him, lying back on the pillows. Elise allowed all the adoration she felt for him to show, reaching out to gently skim her fingers over his bruised cheek. Zan couldn't look away. Now she was the one who held him trapped with her emotion-laden gaze. She leaned forward to rub her nose to his, before allowing her lips to trail over the tender skin that she had just caressed. She bathed his other cheek with the same attention before lifting her head to stare down into his face. Elise's hair tumbled around them both.

"Let me do this for you," Elise whispered, echoing Zan's earlier words to her.

At his nod, she began her healing of the unseen wounds to his soul. There wasn't a part of him that she didn't caress with her hands, followed by her lips. In her mind, every place she touched she bathed with the balm of her love. She paid special attention to the alien tatoo on his right upper arm, tracing the pattern with the tip of her finger before pressing warm, open-mouthed kisses to it. She could feel Zan's heart break open at the act, understanding that she was letting him know in no uncertain terms that she embraced all parts of him. When she straddled him to take him inside her, their coming together was not fast and furious, but gentle and slow and tender.

Afterward, she rested in his arms, content to know that Zan finally truly understood. He was everything she ever wanted or needed, just as he was. There wasn't one thing that she would change about him, especially his other-worldly status. It was an integral part of who he was, and to take away that part of him would actually diminish him in her eyes. For the first time in his life, Zan wouldn't change the fact that he was an alien.

[Realistic Dreamer]

I want to thank everyone who took the time to respond. I have to admit, I really wanted to continue with this, but I was truly worried that it wouldn't be exciting enough. I can have some fun with this. Elise's family's interactions with Zan, and his learning to deal with people who care for him, have some real potential. Matthew, especially, will see Zan as someone to look up to. I'm excited about it, but it won't be life-threatening stuff, so I was a little worried about readers being bored.

So, thank you again, Gentle Readers, for your faithfulness to the story and your incredible feedback. This latest chapter is part of their last full day in New York. Let me know what you think ....



Chapter 42

After spending some time snuggling together, Zan and Elise got up face the day. Since they had both showered the night before, they merely got dressed. Donning his cargo pants, Zan pulled his favorite sweater of hers from the drawer ... the soft red one with little white pearl buttons that could so easily drive him crazy when he thought about slowly undoing them. She had just finished putting on her tank top when he came up behind her. Holding it out for her, he watched as she slipped her arms in the sleeves. He then reached around her to button it, taking his time and occasionally burying his nose in her tumbled hair. Elise wrapped her hands around his forearms as he worked, leaning back against him, resting her head on his shoulder.

"What do you want to do today?" she asked him a little breathlessly when he had completed the task and just held her in his gentle grasp.

"There's a couple of places I want to hit. One you're not going to be too thrilled about," Zan replied.

"You want to go to the crib, don't you?" Elise sighed. "Why? You're not that strong yet, although you're much better now that you've had decent rest."

"I just want to clear out my stuff. It'll be safe enough, I think. I still can barely feel the others, so I'm pretty sure they're not around," he soothed. "Then I want to stop and say good-bye to a friend of mine."

Elise turned her head a bit on his shoulder to look at him, and Zan pressed a kiss to her temple before letting her go. They headed toward the kitchen so that she could start breakfast.

"Who's this friend?" she asked curiously.

"Remember I told you I work on motorcycles at this garage sometimes? The owner's name is Tom. He's a really good guy; taught me everything he could and let me work for him whenever I'd show up. There were times, when we were done for the day, that he would just sit and listen to me talk about anything I felt like," he smiled. "He wants to meet you."

"Me?" Elise stopped in surprise.

"Yeah. Last week it took him all of about 2 minutes to figure out that I was in love," Zan's smile turned into a grin when she blushed. He ran a finger down her nose. "He told me to be sure and bring you around. I want to do that today, if it's okay."

Elise nodded her agreement as they continued to the kitchen. There were so few people in Zan's life, and from the way he spoke about Tom, she could tell that he was probably the closest thing to a father figure he had. Wild horses couldn't keep her from meeting him. She also thought about Zan taking her to the crib. She figured that he must feel that it was okay, because he was so adamant about never risking her safety. She shivered a bit, thinking ahead to seeing the place where Zan had spent almost all of his life. Elise had gotten glimpses of what it looked like thru the connection he had originally forged with her. It was awful.

She shook off her feeling of melancholy, reaching to turn on the radio and rummaging around for what she'd need to start breakfast. Elise pulled out all the stops, making eggs, bacon, hashbrowns, toast, juice and coffee. When Zan had been so ill, he hadn't eaten much, so she was attempting to make up for lost time. He did justice to her cooking, not only because he wanted to please her, but because he was finally truly hungry again. He'd never eaten so well in his life.

Once they had finished, Elise cleared the plates and loaded them in the dishwasher. She then went back to her bedroom and pulled a duffle bag out of her closet, thinking that Zan could use it to load his stuff. She made a pit stop in the bathroom to clean up and brush her hair, and then let him know she was ready to go.

They walked slowly thru the late November morning. Zan had his arm slung casually over her shoulder, as was his wont, and he would occasionally brush her cheek with the back of his thumb or gently fist her hair. Elise kept her arm tight around him, her hand tucked into the waistband of his pants.

"Are you sure about this?" she asked him as they strolled to the subway entrance.

"Yeah. I can feel their presence a little stronger now than before, but it's nowhere near the way it would be if they were here," he told her.

"Why do you think they left?" she wondered out loud.

"Beats the shit out of me. The summit is here, so why leave? What's out there that they would drop everything and risk missing the way off the planet for?" Zan thought out loud. "Whatever it is, it has to be more important than the meeting of the minds."

"Or, maybe it was something that they needed in order to still be considered legit," Elise speculated.

"I thought about that," Zan admitted. "But, what would it be? Nicholas was pretty clear that Kivar was only interested in the Royal 4. Anything else was unacceptable. Why try and kill me?" Zan tightened his arm around her when he felt her stiffen at his words. "I mean, outside of the fact that Rath's an ass and really doesn't think too well for himself. Lonnie was always telling him what to do, said he had space for rent in his head. He usually doesn't act without her express okay."

"So you think she was behind him pushing you in front of that truck?!" Elise was outraged. "I still can't believe she's your sister," she shook her head in disgust. "Man, I wish I could have clocked her, too. Pisses me off," she muttered.

Zan grabbed the fist she'd unconsciously made with her free hand and brought it to his mouth, pressing a warm kiss on her clenched fingers.

"Remind me to always stay on your good side," he laughed at her fierceness as he pulled her into a hug, resting his chin on the top of her head.

Elise laid her head on his chest, allowing the steady rhythm of his heart to calm her. It was the most soothing sound in the world, made doubly sweet by the fact that the beat could have been so easily stilled by the treachery of the other aliens. She could feel herself relax, pulling back to gaze up into his face.

Zan couldn't resist her. He lowered his head to brush her lips with his own, deepening the kiss when he felt her instant response. Elise rose on her toes, trying to get as close as she could, opening up and inviting his exploration. His tongue could do such magical things to her, making her achy and needy. When he finally broke the caress, she followed him, not wanting to end the contact. Zan pulled her closer, moving to kiss her neck, sucking the tender skin before laving the area with his tongue. He rested his forehead on her temple, breathing in her scent.

"I gotta remember to get rid of that before I meet your folks," he whispered in her ear.

"My dad might not take too kindly to seeing your mark," Elise nodded in agreement as she touched the spot. "But I love it, so let's wait until the very last minute, alright?"

"Yeah," he agreed.

Zan finally pulled away, lacing their fingers together to resume the walk to the subway station. He put in the tokens to get them thru the turnstile, and held her close while they waited for the train. The ride to the crib was very short, because it wasn't far away at all. After getting off, he led her to the entrance. Just getting there gave Elise the willies, because the way there was dank and dark, and they had to pick their way over piles of refuse and puddles of dirty water. She held tightly to his hand, constantly checking around to see if anyone was there.

When they reached the main room, Zan snapped his fingers to flip on the lights.

"Okay, I can see you're going to be a very handy guy to have around during a power outage," she grinned.

Her smile faded from her face as she gazed around the room. The phrase that came to her mind was "used and abused." Everything was second-hand, and a cheap second-hand at that. The furniture was ratty and dirty, everything was dusty, and there was nothing that spoke to her of having any meaning. She could easily see one of the aliens taking an object that someone had discarded, thinking it might be useful, or maybe it had caught their fancy, but nothing had any lasting value. She looked up to find Zan watching her intently. He seemed to know what was on her mind.

"Don't feel bad for me," he said quietly. "This," he gestured "was all just so much stuff. It still is. Everything I ever had here is just because it was something I needed at some point, not anything I gave a rat's ass about. You probably think that's sad, and maybe it is," he shrugged. "It's all part of that hand I was dealt. It wasn't so bad, because I never really knew what I was missing. But, I do know one thing ... there isn't a damn thing here that I care about. There isn't one thing that would hold me back from being with you. If I had a choice between having all the classiest shit in the world and never finding you, or having this and having you in my life, I would choose this every single time."

Elise's throat clogged with tears at his words, and she threw her arms around his neck, holding him tightly. She didn't know what to say, so she just held him closely, letting the minutes pass without words. She finally pulled back and gave him a watery smile, sniffling a bit. Zan gently brushed away the tears with his thumbs.

"I'm just gonna go and pack up what I want," he nodded in the direction of a small room. "Won't take long," he backed away, shaking out the duffle bag they'd brought along.

Elise nodded, looking around while she reached into her jacket pocket for a tissue to blow her nose with. She continued to walk around the main room when her attention was caught by something hanging on one of the walls, something she vaguely remembered seeing in the images that Zan had sent her. There were four of them, and by the positioning, she could tell that these were things that meant something to the aliens. She stepped closer, gazing up at them. These were the birth pods.

They were green and leathery looking, as if their original state was moisture-laden and they had dried out. She couldn't quite reach, so Elise grabbed a chair and pulled it up to the wall, climbing on it. She tentatively touched them, fingering what looked like tears in the shells. One of them, when she brushed her hand over it, gave off a tingle of energy ... a vibration of sorts. It felt rather pleasant to her, and she was stroking it when Zan re-entered the room.

"This one was yours," Elise looked over her shoulder to say to him when he walked back into the room.

"How did you know?" he asked as he came up behind her, the duffle bag slung over his shoulder, placing his hands on her hips to steady her.

"I can feel it," she told him with a slight frown. "It's as if I recognized it as soon as I touched it."

Elise turned around in Zan's grasp, looking down at him, and he swung her to the floor, wincing slightly.

"Are you okay?" she asked, immediately concerned.

"That pulled a bit," he admitted.

"Maybe we should go. I don't want you to get too tired. Do you have everything you need?" she watched his face carefully.

"Yeah, I'm ready," he told her, grabbing her hand and leading her toward the entrance. "I can't say I'll miss this," his voice was sarcastic as he looked around one last time. He smiled down at her. "Let's jet."

Walking away from the only place he had ever known as home, Zan felt himself mentally shaking the dust of it from his feet. He never wanted to see it again.

[Realistic Dreamer]

Happy day before April Fool's Day, Gentle Readers. I keep sounding like a broken record, apologizing for the delays, but this whole remodelling thing is just really demanding of my attention. It's just taking up alot of my free time. It's going to be pretty much the same for the next 6 weeks or so, I'm sorry to say. But, I'll try to update as much as I can.

Thanks for your patience and faithfulness to this story. And the feedback has been awesome. Let me know what you think of the next chapter ...


Chapter 43


"Tom's office is around in back," Zan said as he pushed open the door to the garage, letting Elise precede him. "I don't think anyone else is here, because we're getting into the off season for motorcycles. Everyone's done winterizing, so now it's just pretty much custom work till spring. He usually handles that alone."

Elise stood just inside the entrance, allowing her eyes to adjust to going from bright sunlight to the dimmer interior. She wondered what it was about garages ... they all seemed to have a universal scent, a combination of gasoline, lubricants, exhaust fumes and machinery. Her uncle owned a garage back home, and it smelled just like this one. The only difference here was that, instead of cars and SUV's and minivans, it was all Harley Davidsons.

She turned her gaze up to Zan, waiting for him to lead her in the right direction, and almost did a doubletake. Good heavens, his face was practically glowing. Now there was a look she was familiar with, and it almost always involved cars, snow mobiles or motorcycles. She could hear her mother now ...

"Lisa, when the male of the species is young, that old saying about a boy and his dog is true. But when they get older," she shook her head with a sigh, "it's all about a man and his truck. Substitute any type of machinery you want, but the feeling is the same."

Elise watched Zan as he looked around admiringly, and she idly wondered if he would feel this way about a really fast spaceship. A smile broke out on her face at the thought, and it caught Zan's attention.

"What?" he looked down at her animated features, wanting to be let in on whatever it was that had her grinning.

"Nothing," Elise laughed. "I'm just happy to be here ... with you," she nudged him with her hip.

"Uh huh," Zan looked down at her with suspicion.

She gave him her most innocent, butter-won't-melt-in-my-mouth look, before gesturing for him to lead the way. Shaking his head, Zan took her hand, walking to the back of the garage and the small office. Stopping in the doorway, he knocked before strolling in.

"I see the fall rush is over," Zan said as he moved to seat himself on one of the two chairs in front of Tom's desk, Elise slipping into the other one.

"Yeah, we finished the last of it over the weekend," he replied, his attention focused on the computer screen in front of him. Looking up, Tom's eyes widened. "Man, what the hell happened to your face?" he asked in amazement. "Sorry," he apologized quickly when he saw Elise sitting next to Zan, her hand tight in his grasp. "First things first. My name's Tom, and you must be Elise. Zan's told me about you, so it's nice to meet you," he got up with a smile and offered his hand, which Elise shook. "Okay, now what the heck happened to your face?" he reiterated as he sat back down.

"Long story," Zan shrugged. "I got jumped last week," he said, deciding to stick with Elise's tale to her mother. "That's why I haven't been here to help out. I wasn't in the best of shape for awhile."

"You report it to the cops?" Tom asked.

"Nah, I didn't get a good look at them, so I figured it'd be a waste of time," Zan replied.

"You go to the emergency room?" Tom questioned.

Zan shook his head. "Lise took care of me," he said quietly, gazing down at her for a moment. "She did a great job, too," he smiled. Elise beamed back.

Tom got the feeling that he really didn't want to talk about it much, so he decided to let it go.

"Just as long as you're feeling better," he said.

"I'm still a little tired, but otherwise I'm good," Zan nodded.

"So, what brings you here?" Tom asked. "All I have now is custom work. You're free to help out if you want, but I can't pay much. I got a real sweet Electra Glide that came in Saturday," he smiled knowingly as Zan's face lit up. "Why don't you both come out and take a look."

Tom led the way back into the garage, walking up to a candy apple red Harley.

"That is just the shit," Zan breathed as he looked at it, before throwing his leg over the seat to settle in.

"Why don't you hop on too?" Tom said to Elise.

She didn't need to be told twice. She climbed onto the higher passenger seat behind Zan, grinning as he leaned back between her spread legs, making himself comfortable there.

For the next few hours, they stayed where they were. Tom took a spot on another cycle, and he and Zan spent the time talking. They discussed motorcycles and Zan told him about his probable move to the UP. Elise didn't contribute much ... she happily sat back and watched the two of them interact. She had been right about her assessment of the relationship. Tom had a rather fatherly attitude toward Zan and, in turn, he had Zan's respect. It was easy to see the close friendship between them, and Elise recognized moments where Tom gave advice, moments that reminded her of her own father when he offered counsel. She gave a small, contented sigh. It eased her mind alot to know that, despite the messed up alien family situation, Zan had at least one person that cared about him before she came into his life. She leaned forward and wrapped her arms around his neck, giving him a hug from behind as her feelings got the better of her.

Tom used the moment to excuse himself, hearing the phone ring in his office.

"What's up, baby?" Zan asked as he leaned his head back to look up at her.

"I like him," Elise told him as she gazed down at his face. "You were right, he's a good guy."

"Yeah. This place," his sweeping arm encompassed the garage, "it was like my refuge. There were times when things were really bad at the crib ... I would feel like they were closing in on me, constantly challenging me, probing for a weak spot ... that I would come here. Tom never questioned why I just suddenly showed up. He'd put me on something, give me all the work I could handle, for as long as I wanted to be here."

Tom stood in the doorway of his office after his phone call was over, watching Zan and Elise as they sat together, talking quietly. He took in their easy familiarity, the small touches, the ready smiles. He grinned when he saw Zan lean back and pull Elise down to whisper something in her ear. Her pretended shock, and the playful push on his arm that she gave him, had Zan laughing. Tom always had a real fondness for him, and in all the time he'd known Zan, all he'd ever seen in his eyes was loneliness. He was as glad to see the kid truly happy as he was when his own daughters had found the love of their life.

Acting on impulse, Tom walked over to his desk and pulled out his camera. Because of the work he did ... repairs, body work and custom work ... he kept a digital camera in his office, so the photos were easily downloaded into his computer. Sometimes he printed them out on stock paper for a customer, and there were those he kept to be given out as examples of his work.

Going back to the doorway, he zoomed in on Zan and Elise. There was a lull in their conversation, and he was simply leaning back against her, while her arms were resting on his shoulders. Zan had that small, lopsided smile on his face, while Elise was gazing down at him. Tom took the picture and then went to download it and print it for them. It was while he was occupied with his small surprise that Zan and Elise came into the office.

"We're gonna jet," Zan told him. "Lise is getting hungry," he looked down at her when she gave him a nudge with her elbow, and corrected himself. "We're getting hungry," he checked for approval and at her nod, continued, "and we're looking for Chinese."

"Hang on for a sec, I have something for you," Tom told them.

While they were waiting, Elise came around to look at the pictures that were on Tom's desk.

"Are these all of your family?" she asked, taking in the numerous candid shots.

"Yeah. That's my wife, Chris, my daughter Amanda and her fiance Mark .. they're getting married in June ... this is my son John and his sister Laura. This is Angela and her boyfriend Luke," Tom identified each member of his family in the various pictures.

"What does Luke do for a living?" she laughed as she picked up the photo of Angela and her boyfriend.

"He's in the Air Force. He works on ejection seats for fighter planes," Tom said with a knowing grin.

"Ah, that explains the t-shirt then," Elise snickered.

Emblazoned on Luke's chest were the words "The Thrust You Can Trust." She was still giggling when she put the frame back on the desk. She walked back to Zan to let him know that she was going to make a quick trip to the restroom before they left. Pulling his head down and standing on tiptoe, she whispered in his ear ... something that made him pull back and raise his eyebrow, while his lips quirked in a smile. He nodded and she strolled away, putting a little more sway in her hips than usual.

Zan just watched her retreat for a few seconds, before he turned back to Tom, not surprised to see a smile of amusement on his face.

"She," Zan indicated Elise's retreating figure, "she wanted me to find out where I could get a shirt like that ... something about truth in advertising," he elaborated with a grin, while listening to Tom crack up.

"I gotta tell you, Zan," Tom told him when he was under control again, "you have a real keeper there. She's a great girl, and you're a lucky guy."

"Yeah, I know," Zan said in all seriousness.

When she returned, Tom offered them the picture he had taken. Elise was particularly thrilled, and threw her arms around Tom in a big hug, thanking him profusely. He gave her a folder to put it in, to keep it from getting crushed, and she carefully placed it inside. They then exchanged email addresses, Elise offering the one she used when she was at home in the UP. She promised to faithfully keep him up-to-date on what they were doing and, she informed him earnestly, she expected an invitation to Amanda's wedding, because they wouldn't miss it for anything.

As they walked to the entrance, Zan had his arm around her shoulders, and he met Tom's gaze above her head. The older man's eyes conveyed total approval, and Zan smiled. [/img]

[Realistic Dreamer]

Gentle Readers ... Happy Memorial Day.

I'm sorry this took so long. Upside was that the shower was a great success and my house looks wonderful, such as it is. With an old house, it's never done, but I'm happy with the way it is now. We're still remodeling, but the big push seems to be off. Ooh, and the cake I ordered for the shower was simply awesome ... yellow cake with raspberry and creme filling and just scads of buttercreme frosting. The calorie content was not to be believed.

This chapter is part of a rather lengthy scene again, hence the "a" designation. And who knew that my nookie muse would be so slow and picky? Silly thing ...


Chapter 44a

Zan's lips quirked as he strolled thru the twilight back to Elise's apartment, the duffle bag slung over one shoulder. Watching his girl was always his favorite pastime, but when she was being playful, it was even better. She was currently about six paces ahead of him, dancing languidly down the street to a tune that was only in her head, her hips moving in a sensuous rhythm. He kept walking, even when she suddenly stopped, raising her arms above her head, swaying to the unheard music. Zan came around and took a position in front of her, drinking in her features as his mouth got dry. Her eyes were closed, her lips parted in the slightest of smiles as she reached behind her to gather up her hair to the top of her head. She felt his hands go to her hips, pulling them tightly against his own as his body began to mirror her movement.

"I've seen it all, and it's never enough ... it keeps leaving me needing you", she sang in a slow, sultry voice before opening her eyes to stare at him, the song dying away.

Their gazes touched and clung, the longing they felt for each other almost palatable. The air between them seemed to heat up as their breathing quickened, and Zan got hungry as he watched Elise moisten her lips with her tongue. Suddenly needing to be steadied, she let her hair tumble around her shoulders as she fisted his jacket.

"Take me away, take me away ... I've got nothing left to say ..." she whispered.

Zan responded to her invitation, lowering his head to capture her lips in a fevered kiss. Elise held back for a moment, worried that his mouth might still be tender, so she allowed him to set the intensity of their embrace. She inwardly grinned at the strength of the kiss, realizing that he obviously was not having a problem with it being painful. That was all she needed to know, and she threw herself into her response. As his arms tightened around her, she released her grip on his jacket to wrap her arms around his neck. She searched his warm recesses with her tongue, while allowing him free access for his own exploration. She was whimpering, she wanted him so badly.

He pulled his mouth from hers, breathing heavily. He rested his forehead against hers, his heart thundering.

"Zan," she sighed, "I want you now."

"Likewise," he moved to whisper in her ear, before biting down gently on the lobe. Elise shivered as her response to the nip skittered down her spine. "But not here," his voice was husky as he nuzzled the soft hair at her temple.

"No," she agreed, feeling achy and needy, wanting his sure hands on every inch of her.

"We should ..." Zan's voice was low as he feathered a kiss along her cheekbone, his lips tracing the freckles that he loved so much, " ... keep going ..." he moved to the sweet corner of her mouth, pressing an warm caress there, his arm around the small of her back the only thing that held her upright as she leaned back in abandon, " ... keep walking ... " he traced her jaw to the sensitive spot below her earlobe, swirling his tongue along the soft skin, " ... one foot ... " he breathed in her scent, " ... in front of the other ... " his lips moved along her throat to the small hollow at the base, laving the area with soothing strokes.

Zan finally pulled back, tenderly brushing her hair back from her face. Elise's eyes fluttered open, her lips parted. She had the look of a girl who had been thoroughly kissed, her eyes soft and unfocused. He slowly ran the backs of his fingers down her cheek, smiling as she leaned into his caress.

"Let's go," he said huskily, when she seemed to have come back to earth.

Zan put his arm around her, holding her close to his side as they hurried the short distance to her apartment. He was standing right behind her, pushing her hair out of the way to kiss the back of her neck as she fumbled with the key, trying to get it in the lock of the lobby door. He found one of his favorite spots, the sensitive skin right behind the shell of her ear, and he bathed it with loving attention. Her knees buckled for a moment before straightening, finally getting the door open.

At her success, Zan whirled her around, his lips capturing hers, his tongue seeking out her sweetness. His need was clear, finding a matching want in Elise. She was leaning back against the doorjamb, holding him to her with her hands fisted in his jacket again. Zan lifted her, cradling her in his arms as his mouth never left hers, stumbling thru the door and down the hall to the elevator. He fumbled blindly for the button, all other focus narrowed to their fevered kiss. He barely heard the doors open before they fell inside, and he turned so that his back was against the wall, grunting as he let the duffle bag he was carrying fall off his shoulder. It was only the strength of his will that kept him on his feet. Elise came up for air, and pushed the 2nd floor button with her foot, before returning her attention to him.

"Zan," she whispered against his mouth, "what about your ribs?"

"What about them?" he muttered back.

"They ... they don't hurt?" she moaned as she let her head fall back so he could kiss a trail down her throat, nuzzling his nose into the collar of her jacket.

"Nah, they don't ..." he breathed against the soft skin, " ... hurt at all."

Elise raised her head, placing her hand along the underside of his jaw, urging him to look at her. She searched his eyes carefully, looking for any sign of discomfort. Zan's gaze was steady, clear and filled with desire, and Elise smiled as she rubbed her nose against his. She moved to kiss him again when they heard the bell, indicating that the elevator door was about to open again. Sighing, Zan reluctantly let her feet slide to the floor, picking up the duffle bag. He slung his arm around her shoulders, pulling her close as the door opened.

After walking the short distance down the hall to her door, Zan leaned up against the wall to watch, his warm finger tracing a line from her temple to her parted lips, waiting while she unlocked the door. Elise closed her eyes at the caress, giving his finger a gentle bite before swirling her tongue around it and releasing it. Zan's breathing hitched, but before he could respond, she had the door open and she pulled him urgently inside, slamming it and turning on the light, thanking heaven for the invention of the dimmer switch.

Elise roughly pushed the duffle bag off his shoulder, and Zan let it fall to the floor, his eyes never leaving hers. She closed the space between them, reaching up to feather her fingers over his lips. With her other hand, she traced the bruise that still marred the left side of his face. The light touch of both hands moved down his throat, and Zan allowed his head to fall back. Elise stood on her toes to place warm kisses in the hollow, much as he had caressed her before, feeling his pulse throb under her lips. He threaded his fingers thru her hair, cradling the nape of her neck, involuntarily pressing her closer to him before loosening his grip, leaving his hands still tangled in her silky strands. She brushed her nose into the shirt at his throat, searching for his collarbone, tasting it with her tongue. She came back up for air to nuzzle the underside of his jaw.

"This," she muttered in frustration, as she tugged on the zipper of his jacket, "is seriously getting in my way."

She gave a sharp pull to open it, and then pushed the leather off his shoulders so that it fell to the floor.

"Better," she sighed in satisfaction.

"For you, maybe," Zan quirked a grin as he reached to give her jacket the same treatment. It quickly joined his leather as he kicked it out of the way.

His eyes narrowed as they took in her red sweater, his favorite. All those small pearl buttons ... normally, he would be aching with the anticipation of undoing them slowly, one by one. Now, they were just a whole lot of little obstacles that were testing his control. To finesse, or not to finesse ... that was the question. Did he have the wherewithall to be slow and sensuous, or did he just want to rip the thing off her? At that moment, Elise reached out with her right hand, fisted the front of his t-shirt (her favorite ... the black one, with the sleeves torn off), and yanked him to her, latching onto his lower lip like a starving woman. Okay, screw finesse. He waved his hand over the front of her sweater, and all those little buttons just popped right open.

"How handy," she leaned back to breathe.

"Definitely one of it's better uses," Zan grinned.

Elise could practically feel his regard warming her as the smile faded from his face. His gaze became intent, as he took in the creamy skin suddenly exposed. One finger skimmed the top of her breasts, above the line of the scrap of lace that was her bra.

"You have freckles, even here," his voice was quiet.

Elise went still. She was so tuned into Zan, that she could feel the change that came inside of him, something that elicited a mirror response in her. What had been a firestorm of desire in them both, something wild and untamed, was now a quiet conflagration of need. It reminded her of the times that her father would build a fire in their backyard on cool nights. The flames would burn bright and fast at first, but the real heat ... the inferno ... came after the flames died down into red-hot coals.

Zan's hands went to her waist, pulling her to him, his mouth finding hers for a kiss that went as deep has her bones. She thought that he had yearned for her before, but that was as nothing, compared to what she felt from him in this moment. She filled all the lonely places in his heart, completed what he knew was missing all his life but could never articulate, finished what he unconsciously knew had been started long ago.

They say the minute you saw her, you were smitten.

Ava's voice came to her, unbidden, through their connection, and a conviction was born in Elise that she was coming to the knowledge of an old truth. There was a burgeoning realization that what was happening between them was as familiar to her as breathing. It spurred her on. Suddenly, she was touching him ... touching him in ways that she somehow knew pleased him beyond all measure. Her hands, her lips found new paths. She made a small sound of disbelief. These new paths were as old as time to them.

'How do I know this?' she thought, before again being swept away.

Zan, too, was rocked with this new revelation. The conviction that they had done this before was stronger than it had ever been. His mind went back to when he had first caught a glimpse of her, the first time they met. There had been a critical shift inside him, the feeling that a balance was restored, a vital missing piece put into place that made the whole puzzle make sense. He finally made sense.

The bodies may be different, but the players were the same.

Their clothes fell away. They had never been so attuned to each other's desires. Zan's touch on her body went from feather-light brushes of his fingers to warm, strong caresses of his sure hands, always seeming to understand what she needed. And Elise used her new-found knowledge of what pleased him to show Zan just how much she wanted him, only him.

"You're so beautiful," he said in awe as he moved to kiss her breasts over and over.

"I love touching you," she breathed as her hand closed over his erection, causing him to moan as his eyes fell closed.

Suddenly, though, it wasn't enough to feel her beneath him ... to hear her small moans and whimpers of need and pleasure. He had to see into her eyes, the windows of her soul. He had to be connected to her in every way possible, involve every sense.

"Look at me, baby ... I want to see you when you come," Zan's voice was tight as he entered her with one sure stroke.

"I love you ... you're everything," Elise writhed under him as her hips kept the rhythm he set, her eyes never leaving his.

Their shattering, when it came, was the stuff of dreams, their cries filling the room.

"Zan ... kereth" Elise sobbed.

"Elise ... kierys" Zan's voice was hoarse.

TBC ...

song lyrics: Take Me Away by Lifehouse

[Realistic Dreamer]

Gentle Readers:

I apologize, over and over. Everything got in my way ... remodeling (oy!), vacation (to the UP .. now that was fun), The Wedding (I had such a blast), work (tons of overtime, which I absolutely loathe). Then, my son was in little league, which was 2 nights a week, plus lots of practices. And, my muse up and deserted me, the fickle thing. She finally showed up again, looking smug, as if to say "did you miss me?" If I wasn't so happy to see her, I would have tossed her out.

Thank you for your incredible patience ...


From Chapter 44A

Their clothes fell away. They had never been so attuned to each other's desires. Zan's touch on her body went from feather-light brushes of his fingers to warm, strong caresses of his sure hands, always seeming to understand what she needed. And Elise used her new-found knowledge of what pleased him to show Zan just how much she wanted him, only him.

"You're so beautiful," he said in awe as he moved to kiss her breasts over and over.

"I love touching you," she breathed as her hand closed over his erection, causing him to moan as his eyes fell closed.

Suddenly, though, it wasn't enough to feel her beneath him ... to hear her small moans and whimpers of need and pleasure. He had to see into her eyes, the windows of her soul. He had to be connected to her in every way possible, involve every sense.

"Look at me, baby ... I want to see you when you come," Zan's voice was tight as he entered her with one sure stroke.

"I love you ... you're everything," Elise writhed under him as her hips kept the rhythm he set, her eyes never leaving his.

Their shattering, when it came, was the stuff of dreams, their cries filling the room.

"Zan ... kereth" Elise sobbed.[/i]

"Elise ... kierys" Zan's voice was hoarse.


Chapter 44B

Zan pressed his forehead to her shoulder, the weight of his body resting on his elbows on either side of her, his breath coming in short pants. He would swear he saw stars ... what happened between them was that intense. Elise lay underneath him on the floor, slightly turned away, as she too tried to get her breathing under control again. Zan finally found the strength to lift his head, wanting to check on her, but she kept her face averted. All he could see was the line of her cheek.

"You called me Elise," she said in a small voice. She turned to look at him, her hair touseled and damp with sweat, the latent flush still spread across her features. "You never call me that. You've always called me Lise."

For the life of him, Zan couldn't think of how to respond. He was as confused as she was. Hell, he'd just used what he was guessing was an Antarian endearment, something he'd never said before. Not in this lifetime, anyway. He had a moment where he thought he might have made it up, but Elise had used a variation of the same word, and she'd said it first. Zan frowned, as he tried to make some sense out of what was going on. He could feel the rush of anger as, once again, he was left to try and take another newly revealed piece of some past life and fit it in a puzzle that he couldn't begin to understand. He wasted a few moments thinking about how he'd love to kick his "Protector's" ass from one side of this planet to the other, before banishing him to some backwater outpost in the farthest reaches of the universe.

Elise took advantage of his distraction to scoot out from under him, sitting on the floor with her back against the couch. Her knees were pulled up to her chest, her arms wrapped around them, and she had her head buried. Zan shook off his vindictive thoughts, his heart aching in sympathy at her obvious distress. He might be in the dark, but there was one thing he understood, and that was confusion after a big revelation. Been there, done that ... again, and again, and again.

Zan got to his feet and reached for his cargo pants, donning them and zipping up. He left the button undone as he bent to grab his shirt. Picking it up, he went over to Elise and knelt in front of her.

"Lise? Baby, can you look at me?" his voice was gentle as he reached out, wanting to brush her hair back, but allowing his hand to fall again.

Elise shook her head as she continued to keep her face buried.

"We gotta talk about this, sweetness. Something's going on that we don't understand. Hell, I don't get it either; I'm just as much in the dark as you are," Zan said earnestly. "Don't shut me out."

Elise raised her head to look at him, her eyes filled with uncertainty as she bit her lower lip. She remained silent as her confused gaze clung to his.

"Here," Zan reached out to slip his t-shirt over her head, helping her put it on.

Elise could feel the strength of his hands as he smoothed it in place, reaching behind her to carefully pull her hair free. He knew that she was feeling particularly vulnerable, and thought that having something on would help banish that. He could have used her sweater, but he hoped that wearing something of his would make her feel more secure ... that he surrounded her with his love, even as his shirt enveloped her slender form.

Zan moved to sit next to her, his back against the couch. Wordlessly, he gathered her in his arms, pulling her onto his lap and cradling her. Elise tucked her head under his chin, making a small nestling gesture as she rubbed her cheek against his chest. She played with the hem of his shirt, staring at nothing in particular. Zan tangled his hand in the silky hair at the nape of her neck, his fingers lightly grazing the soft skin there over and over. His now-even breathing, and the steady beat of his heart, helped to quiet her spirit. After a long time, she gave out a sigh, pushing her hair off her forehead and shaking her head.

"How did I do that, Zan?" her voice trembled just a bit as she leaned back to look at him. Elise cleared her throat to try again. "I just said a word I've never even heard before, right in the middle of mind-blowing sex ... a word you seem to have used too," she wrinkled her nose as she thought back to the slightly different variation. "Sort of," she qualified. Not the same word, but close enough.

Zan couldn't help the little satisfied expression that found it's way to his face. Definitely the wrong time to be gratified that it was a great for her as it was for him, but there it was. Damn, could he be any more of a horndog?

"Everything I did, everything I felt ... it was as if I was suddenly remembering something that happened between us before. Something that happened a long time ago. It was all so familiar, like a memory that finally came to the surface," she told him, her gaze serious and just a little panicked.

Elise took a moment to change her position, turning so she was facing him, straddling his hips.

"How do I know these things? How do I know that this," she said as she put her hand into his loose pants to brush a particularly sensitive spot on his hip, "makes you crazy?"

Zan pulled in a quick breath at her caress, desire flaring in his eyes, his upward motion into her hand an unconscious act. Elise leaned forward to bite down on his shoulder, sucking hard, and his eyes fluttered closed with a moan. She soothed the reddened area with her tongue, before skimming her fingers down his chest, moving to whisper in his ear.

"And how do I know," her voice was husky, "that you love what I just did. That you feel I'm marking you as my own, staking my claim ... that it's something I've done before?"

His eyes still closed, Zan turned his face to capture her lips. They parted eagerly, and his tongue thrust into the waiting warmth of her mouth. He loved the sweetness of it ... this would be his drug of choice for the rest of his days. 'You taste like honey, honey,' the line from one of his favorite Matchbox 20 songs echoed in the back of his mind, and he gave her lower lip a final, tender pull before slowly releasing it, sighing.

His arms tightened around her, needing her nearer, having this almost insane idea that if he just held her as hard as he could, he could pull her inside of him. It amused him to think that, as long as they were two bodies, she would never be close enough.

"You're not an amoeba, Zan," Elise's voice was soft with laughter as she pulled away to rub her nose against his. "You can't absorb me, although I feel the same way you do. I want you all around me, all inside of me."

She leaned back, feeling how his arm around her waist held her steady. She reached out to touch the piercing under his lower lip with the pad of her thumb, her eyes roaming over his face. He wrapped a lock of her hair around his finger, one of his favorite things to do, while his other hand found it's way underneath his shirt to caress the soft skin of her back. Elise was much calmer now, soothed both by the physical contact and the openness of the connection between them.

She was so beautiful, with her hair tumbling around her, her eyes wide and dark, her lips moist and slightly swollen from his kiss. She was swimming in his black t-shirt, and it did amazing things to him ... seeing her wear something of his, especially the way it slipped off of one shoulder. He leaned forward to press a warm kiss to the creamy skin exposed there.

"Zan, do you understand any of this?" Elise asked rather breathlessly.

"No," he muttered as he leaned back against the couch again, "no, I don't." He shrugged. "But, that's nothing new. Anything we ever find out is strictly by accident."

"Your 'Protector,'" Elise make a quotations gesture with her fingers.

"Our 'Protector' was a worthless piece of shit," Zan's voice was openly scornful, his eyes hard. "I learned more from sweet little Ava in 10 minutes than I did, from him, in the entire rest of my life. And I'm including anything he might have told me before he jetted for good."

He watched Elise carefully, noticing that she was wearing that faraway look again, tears just starting to brim as she bit her lower lip nervously. He could tell that the revelations that came from their lovemaking were starting to weigh on her mind again.

"What do you think it all means?" her voice wasn't quite steady. "I mean, if I read my feelings right, we knew each other before. How can that be? You're an alien," she acknowledged, "but I'm a ... a ... an ..." she trailed off.

" ... an alien?" Zan finished softly.

Elise's eyes flew to his face.

"No! No, I'm a human," she shook her head vehemently in denial. "That can't be. It just can't be."

"Why not?" Zan posed the question carefully. "Would it be such a bad thing?"

"I don't know," Elise said miserably, as she twisted the hem of his t-shirt in her hands. "I don't know what I think, how I feel, anything. On the one hand," her arm came out in a sweeping gesture, as if indicating points to be racked up to the good, "we knew each other before and found each other again. On the other hand," her other arm came out in the same gesture, racking points to the bad, "it now seems I don't even know what species I am."

Zan continued to gently caress her underneath his shirt, hoping that his touch would soothe her.

"A person ought to at least be able to be sure about that, right? Suddenly, I don't even know that much about myself. Being adopted made me wonder about my roots sometimes. Even as happy as I am with my life and my family, every once in awhile I would think about my birth parents ... you know, the usual stuff. Who were they? What kind of life did they have? Did they love me enough to give me a better future, or was I just some unplanned nuisance to be dealt with? That kind of thing," Elise told him.

"I remember you telling me that you never felt like going to look for them," Zan reflected, as he turned loose the lock of her hair that he was still playing with. He used his finger to brush her hair back from her forehead, following the line to tuck it behind her ear.

"I never did. Maybe I was too happy to rock the boat," she gave a short laugh. "Maybe I was too cowardly, thinking it would screw things up. Maybe I was too angry. I don't know. Every time I thought about it, I would push the idea away."

"And now?" Zan posed the leading question, sensing a new determination in her.

"Now," Elise said in a firm voice, "now, I think it's a good thing I'm going home. Because there are some things I need to know."

TBC ...

[Realistic Dreamer]

Gentle Readers ... I am seriously ashamed of myself. I can't believe that I allowed so much time to go by between the last update and this one. I won't even offer excuses, because that's what they'd be ... excuses. I am sincerely sorry about letting this story lag.

Having said that, this next part is very transitionary, which also means that it's rather short. Aack! That is almost unacceptable, too.

Thank you to everyone who has kept up with this, and has faithfully bumped it. That, in itself, has encouraged me alot. I've said it before, but you really are the best ...


From Chapter 44B

"On the other hand," her other arm came out in the same gesture, racking points to the bad, "it seems I don't even know what species I am."

Zan continued to gently caress her underneath his shirt, hoping that his touch would soothe her.

"A person ought to at least be able to be sure about that, right? Suddenly, I don't even know that much about myself. Being adopted made me wonder about my roots sometimes. Even as happy as I am with my life and my family, every once in awhile I would think about my birth parents ... you know, the usual stuff. Who were they? What kind of life did they have? Did they love me enough to give me a better future, or was I just some unplanned nuisance to be dealt with? That kind of thing," Elise told him.

"I remember you telling me that you never felt like going to look for them," Zan reflected, as he turned loose the lock of her hair that he was still playing with. He used his finger to brush her hair back from her forehead, following the line to tuck it behind her ear.

"I never did. Maybe I was too happy to rock the boat," she gave a short laugh. "Maybe I was too cowardly, thinking it would screw things up. Maybe I was too angry. I don't know. Every time I thought about it, I would push the idea away."

"And now?" Zan posed the leading question, sensing a new determination in her.

"Now," Elise said in a firm voice, "now, I think it's a good thing I'm going home. Because there are some things I need to know."


Chapter 44c

Elise sighed, shifting a bit as she snuggled back, searching for the warmth of Zan's body ... the body that should be curled around hers right now. Her left hand went to her waist, wanting to interlace her fingers with his ... fingers that should be splayed over her tummy as they usually were when they were nestled together. She turned her cheek more fully into her pillow, waiting to feel the tug on her hair ... the tug she'd feel because Zan always buried his face in her tresses, as if fascinated even in sleep.

Nothing. She felt none of those things. Elise rolled over onto her back, and there was no strong, solid frame to impede her progress. She yawned and stretched, the quick turn of her head to glance out the window letting her know that it was still the middle of the night. She waited, thinking that Zan had maybe taken a quick trip to the bathroom, and hoped he'd hurry back, because she was getting lonely without him. As the minutes ticked by, and he didn't return, she decided to get up and hunt him down. It wasn't like there were alot of places to go in her small apartment, she thought with a grin.

She threw back the covers, getting to her feet and allowing her body another feline stretch. Elise pulled down on Zan's shirt as she strolled toward the hallway, the fabric coming to rest mid-thigh. She fisted the material, bringing it to her nose so she could breathe in his scent, before rubbing her cheek with the soft cotton. Elise loved the way it felt like he surrounded her when she was wearing his tee. She was going to keep this shirt ...

When she reached the entrance to the living room, she paused, leaning back against the doorway. Zan was sitting on the window seat. The sheers were drawn, but the lights from the street bled thru the fine material, so it was easy for her to see him. He had donned his cargo pants, his feet bare, the muted light glinting off her ring, which hung on the silver chain around his neck. He had his finger along the outer edge of the fabric, holding it slightly away from the window. It was clear to her that he was watching, his gaze intent on the darkened world outside.

"They're back," he said flatly, his eyes never leaving the view below.

"The other three?" Elise asked in a soft voice, as she moved into the room. She didn't even question how he'd known, without looking, that she was there. He always knew ...

Zan sat on the kitchen counter, watching his girl as she moved around the small space. She had spaghetti sauce simmering on the stove and was filling a pot with water for the pasta. Elise had to constantly walk past him to get the things she needed to finish supper, and Zan couldn't resist teasing her. He would reach for her, and she would dance out of the way. Or she would let herself be caught, allowing for moments of tender kisses or playful brushes of his hands on appropriate, and sometimes inappropriate, parts of her body.

The radio was on, tuned to the classic rock station that she loved. When she heard a song she liked, she would crank up the volume, as was her wont. Zan didn't pay too much attention to what was playing, but the words of one song nudged his awareness.

"We've got a thing that's called radar love ... "

"That's us," Zan gave her that lopsided smile as she stood between his legs, her arms resting on his thighs. At her questioning look, he elaborated. "When you first came to New York, I knew it. A month before I ever saw you for the first time, I knew you were here. Near drove myself crazy, looking for you every night. I knew you were close, I just couldn't find you. Once I did, it's like I got a lock on you. I always know where you are, and when you walk into a room? Damn, the radar is off the charts."

"Does that mean I can't ever sneak up on you?" Elise teased, her lower lip coming out just a bit.

"Not a chance," Zan grinned.

"Phooey," her moue of disappointment was irresistible. "Well, that takes all the fun out of jumping you and wrestling around."

"Not all the fun," he leaned forward to capture that pouty lip with his own, swiping it with his tongue and giving it a sensual pull before releasing it again.

"Lonnie and Rath," Zan informed her, keeping his gaze fixed on the streets. Elise came back to the present with a jolt. "I don't really feel Ava," he frowned as he thought about it. He finally shook his head. "I can't get a read on her ... I don't think she's here."

"Are you blocking?" there was an edge of concern in Elise's voice as she settled herself so that she faced him on the window seat, pulling her knees up to her chest.

She thought back to a conversation they'd had, about how the aliens could sense each other, almost as if locking on to a unique energy signal. Zan had explained to her how he'd learned to disguise, or block it, as a defense mechanism. None of the others had ever figured out how to accomplish this little feat, which pissed them off greatly. Zan told her that he thought it might be a gift that was imparted only to the king, a protective weapon to guard against betrayal. Of course, he was just guessing, he told her, because this was just one more thing their "protector" never deigned to inform them of.

"Yeah, I've got the mental shield up," Zan's voice was sardonic. "I've had it up for so long now that I don't even think about it anymore. Even after they tried to kill me, it held steady. Ava only found me because she must have followed the truck, not because she ever got a fix on me."

Elise experienced that momentary flare of rage that she always got when she thought about the skanky alien ho, as she'd started referring to Ava in her head. She gave herself up to a moment of regret, thinking she let the chick off waay too easy, and then banished Ava from her thoughts. She gave Zan a speculative look.

"If you're blocking, why are you keeping watch?" her voice took on a note of anxiety. "Do you think they can find us?"

"Nah, not really," Zan hastened to reassure her. Elise looked doubtful, so he explained with a sigh. "Lise, I underestimated them, and it cost me. No way that's going to happen again. If I felt like I could bet the planet that they wouldn't find us, I would still be sitting here. Besides," his voice took on a tender note, "it's not just about me anymore. All I want right now is for us to get out with no trouble," he said.

"C'mere," Zan reached for her hand, and pulled Elise forward. She simply turned, and settled between his legs, leaning back against his solid chest and resting her temple against his jaw. One arm came around her, and he laid his warm palm on the soft skin of her neck. With his other hand, he parted the sheers again to continue his vigil.

"How are you feeling?" he asked, after a time of contented silence, turning his head to gaze down at her for a quick moment before returning his attention to the window.

"Confused," Elise said wryly. "Seriously, seriously confused. Everything about my past was murky before, but now ..." she let her voice die away as she gave a tiny shrug. "Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah," Zan responded.

"Did you ever block me? I remember you telling me that you watched me for weeks, before we finally met. But, there was that period of time when I would feel you, before we actually met." She leaned forward, turning so she could look back at him over her shoulder. "It scared me at first, but after awhile ..." Elise's voice trailed away as she got lost in the recent past. "After awhile, it was all I was waiting for," she shivered as if she could feel his warm, protective presence washing over her once more ... along with that unexplainable inner knowledge that there was nothing to fear, tinged with the slightest feeling of risk that came with the unknown. She settled back against him again.

"I was, at first. Hell, I was so used to keeping the blocks up that I never even thought about it. Like I said, it was second nature by then. Besides," he turned his head to brush his lips across her temple before continuing, "I was looking for you. 'Course, I didn't know that back then, but there was this thing inside me that was driving me mad crazy, all the time. Whatever I found, wherever I found it, I didn't want them anywhere near when I did."

"You could feel me that strong?" Elise breathed.

"Strong enough to wake me up every friggin' night," Zan's voice was husky in her ear as he began to idly caress the soft skin of her throat with the side of his thumb. She swallowed hard, her mouth suddenly dry.

"But, I didn't feel you right away, not like you felt me," Elise said in a wistful voice.

"I was still blocking," Zan admitted.

"Why?" her voice was small.

"You were human. I wasn't," he shrugged. "The others were the kiss of death to anything I ever cared about. I lived my life constantly looking over my shoulder to see if the FBI was on my ass. You looked like America's Sweetheart, and I was from the wrong side of the universe. Pick any reason you like."

Elise's heart clenched as she turned so she was cradled in his lap. Zan continued to look out the window, his expression remote. She reached out to cup his jaw with her small hand.

"What made you change your mind?" she whispered.

Zan finally turned his eyes down toward her, and she could see the remnants of loneliness that dwelt there, brought to the surface by his memories.

"After awhile, I just couldn't ... not ... touch you in some way," he said simply.

Wordlessly, she nodded, tears brimming. She wrapped her arms around his waist and tucked her head under his chin. His free hand tangled in her hair, holding her close, pressing a kiss on her forehead. Elise could feel the tendrils of his love soothing her soul, and she reached out with her own spirit to answer in kind, banishing whatever lingering sense of loneliness he felt in remembering.

Zan could hear her breathing even out as she relaxed against him, and he knew she was asleep. He should probably move her back to the bed and cover her up. Instead, he held her closely, not wanting to let her go. Things were going to be radically different in the days ahead ... he had no idea what was in store for them. So he tightened his arms around her as he jealously guarded their last night alone in New York.

[Realistic Dreamer]

Gentle Readers ...

It's good to be back in Zan and Elise's world again. I've been spending alot of time on another story which is much more painful than this one is. That's my only excuse for being away.

I'd love to hear what you think, as always, and thanks again for being patient with the lack of an update.


Chapter 45

Elise was tired. She was absolutely, totally tired of this bus. And she was impatient, because home was about 85 miles away. 85 long, drawn-out, boring miles. Once they got to Baraga, the end would definitely be in sight. But first, they had to go thru what she called the dead-zone. Highway 41 between Crystal Falls and Covington was nothing but 40 miles of trees ... pine trees, birch trees, aspen trees, living trees, dead trees. And one gas station.

She leaned forward, pulling her headphones down around her neck and digging her right hand into the carry-on bag at her feet. Elise gave a surreptious look around, making sure that no one could see what she was pulling out. She didn't have too much to worry about, because the bus was hardly crowded. She doubted there were more than about 15 people on board, besides herself and Zan, but they were sitting in the back, where the teeny, tiny bathroom was, so there was a certain amount of traffic.

She turned her head to the left, happily giving herself up to a few moments of watching Zan, taking in his sleeping form, his hand loosely held in hers. He sat sprawled on the aisle, leaving her the window seat. Another buffer between her and the other people on the bus. With the high seat backs, she felt confident that no one could see what was in her lap. To make sure, she shifted towards Zan a little, pulling her left foot up onto the seat, so that her leg shielded the metal book that he had given her to put in her bag the morning they left.

Elise awoke to find herself snuggled in Zan's lap, her head tucked under his chin, his arms wrapped securely around her. Even in the early light, his gaze was still watchful of the street below as they sat in the window seat. She blindly lifted her face to nuzzle his jaw, breathing him in. He turned his face down to meet her lips and she opened fully to him in response, welcoming the urgent thrust of his tongue. Their connection fired to life, Zan's caress at once coaxing and compelling and demanding.

Without breaking the contact, Elise moved so that she straddled his hips, rocking against his hardening erection, eliciting a groan from him.

"Lise," he said hoarsely against her mouth, before deepening the kiss even further.

She could feel him everywhere, his presence running thru her veins like a molten flame, consuming her. There was no other place for her on earth, nowhere else she'd rather be, and she gave herself up to the touch that completed her.

"Do you feel it?" she panted, tearing her lips free, breaking the caress to stare into his eyes, her own dark and fathomless with desire.

"Like I could drown in you," Zan slid his hands in her hair at the nape of her neck, tangling his fingers and gently tugging to pull her head back. He pressed his mouth to her exposed throat, swirling his tongue around the delicate hollow. "Like you're everywhere, all inside," his voice was low and husky, sending shivers thru her.

He dragged his lips along her collarbone, pushing his t-shirt back off her shoulder, kissing the creamy skin as his hand trailed down her arm. He briefly threaded his fingers with hers before releasing his grip, dipping under the shirt to search out her breast. She moaned when he cupped it in his hand, and she frantically pulled up the material and whimpered a "Yes!" when his mouth closed over it. As he sucked and nipped, her hips picked up the rhythm, her lips parted, her respirations shallow and fast.

Zan ran his palm over her back, dipping lower.

"Tell me you're not wearing panties," he muttered against her moist skin.

"I'm not wearing panties," she breathed obediently.

"That's my girl," he approved as he turned his attention to her other breast, causing Elise to grind into his arousal with greater fervor. His hand traveled over the curve of her hip to brush between them, finding her more than ready.

Her rhythm was becoming even more insistent, her hands plucking at the waistband of his pants, impatient. It helped that he'd never snapped them, only zippering them up. Elise tugged down on the fly, and his erection came free. He gave a moan as she wrapped one hand around it, the other threading into the hair at the back of his head, needing his lips on hers and urging him back up to her waiting mouth. His kiss was devouring, his tongue exploring her warm recesses with a thoroughness she'd never experienced from him before.

"In my way," he growled, breaking the kiss as he pulled his t-shirt up over her head in one swift motion, flinging it away.

Elise panted as she looked down at Zan's hooded eyes. She yanked at his pants.

"Drop 'em," she commanded. "Now!"

"Demanding ... I'm all into that," his voice was husky as he nuzzled the delicate shell of her ear, biting on the lobe. "Whatever you want, kierys," his whisper sent shivers down her spine.

Zan's arms encircled her waist, and he rose to his feet, as easily as if she weighed nothing. Her legs automatically wrapped around him, and he fell back against the wall, spreading his feet. His pants merely fell to the floor, pooling there. He entered her with one sure stroke, and Elise's head fell back in abandon, her hair falling in a silken stream over his arms, her hands linked behind his neck, breathing in sharply at the heady sensation.

The connection was wide open, the need racing from the two of them to meet in a churning maelstrom of passion. His thrusts were hard and fast and deep, the rocking of her hips in response everything he could have wished for. Elise was right there with him, and when he opened his eyes to watch her, he almost lost it. Her body arched back against the anchor of his arms, her face tipped upwards and lashes dark against cheeks that were flushed with pleasure, biting her lip in concentration.

'Like that ... just like that,' he heard in his mind when he shifted just a bit, changing the angle and picking up the pace.

"Come on, baby," his voice was that low, sensual growl that always drove her crazy. "Come for me."

Elise dropped her head onto his shoulder, biting down with a keening cry as she went over the edge. Zan buried his face into the curve of her neck as he groaned, his own release coming right after hers.

He barely had the strength to remain standing, thankful for the wall behind him that held them up. Elise slowly raised her head, her hair tumbling around her, flame-cheeked and breathing hard. She moistened her lips and gave Zan a brilliant smile. He had never seen her more beautiful than at that moment.

"Words fail," she said as she rested her forehead against his. "But, then again, they always do," she laid her head back on his shoulder.

Elise shook off the memory that made her blush, even now, and took the small metal book, idly turning it over in her free hand. It was darkly colored, and there seemed to be about 4-5 pages, bound together with rings. Her finger traced the swirling symbol on it's cover. She'd seen it before. It was one of the tattoos on Zan's arm. She gave a moment's thought to getting one like it for herself, and grinned as she anticipated her mother's reaction. Maybe she'd better just get a small version, on her lower back. Less chance of Mom seeing it that way. But, Elise wanted one nonetheless.

She turned her attention back to the book, remembering Zan handing her the strange object the morning before.

Elise was standing in front of her dresser, pulling out clothes to pack for the trip home. She grabbed a stack and moved them to the bed, intent on folding them neatly and putting them in her bag. She smiled when she felt Zan come up behind her, aware of his presence before he ever slid his arms around her waist, pulling her back against him and kissing her neck.

"I should get rid of the hickey," he said as his lips moved over the spot.

"I suppose," Elise agreed, her voice regretful. "Don't want my dad killing you in the first five minutes."

Zan placed his fingers on the mark, a slight glow and a steady warmth letting her know that it was gone. Her lower lip came out a bit in a pout.

"No way that's the last time I'll ever give you one of those, sweetness," Zan hugged her close, feeling her dejection thru their bond. "Word on that."

"I know," she leaned back against his shoulder to look into his eyes. "But it was my first."

"Yeah?"

Elise nodded. She supposed it was a silly thing to get all emotional about, but then again, all the firsts with Zan were special, and she cherished every one of them. After a few moments where he just held her, he placed a kiss on her temple and let her go, moving to grab what he wanted to take along. He dug around in the drawers she'd given him in her dresser to use, pulling out clothes and just haphazardly folding them. Elise shook her head in amusement, and he looked up and quirked a lopsided grin at her.

"What? Not neat enough for you?" he smirked.

"Just leave 'em. I'll take care of it," she rolled her eyes.

"Here," he tossed a metal object, along with a small leather pouch, on the bed. They fell next to the bag she was going to use for her walkman, her cd's and 'all that other crap,' as her brothers called it. Could she help it if she was easily bored and brought alot of things with her to alieviate the problem? "Put these with the stuff you're gonna take on the bus."

Elise reached out to pick up the book, holding it in her palm and tracing the swirling design. She looked up at Zan, who had come to stand close beside her, gazing down at her.

"What is this?" she breathed.

"It's one of the things our Protector left with me before he jetted to wherever the hell he is now," Zan shrugged. He grabbed the leather pouch and let a rough stone fall into his palm.

Elise hugged the book close, and picked up the stone, holding it between her thumb and forefinger, raising it to the light. It gave off that same strange vibration of energy that she'd felt when she was touching Zan's birth pod. She turned to him, her eyes brimming with curiosity.

"What does it do?" she asked.

"No clue," his voice held a note of disgust. "Never got the 411 from the man who knows," Zan shook his head. "I used to just sit and hold the damn things sometimes, hoping for some great, blinding light, 'cause I didn't know what else to do. Stupid," he said in self-derision.

Elise put the objects back on the bed, and turned to slip her arms around his waist, laying her head on his chest, snuggling close. Zan didn't realize how much he gave away with those few words. Even now, years later, she could feel the residual emotions thru their bond. His utter confusion as a small boy at being handed at least part of the answers, but watching the one person who could unlock those secrets walk away, sarcastically wishing Zan luck. His sad hope when he would hold them, thinking that maybe if he looked at them long enough, and hard enough, he could wrestle their mysteries out into the open, and have a clue as to what their purpose was. His frustration at having in his possession things that were obviously important, but never knowing what it all meant.

"I always keep them close by," Zan told her as he laid his cheek on her shining hair. Nothing soothed him like the feel of her in his arms, the sheer rightness of it always settling him all the way down to his bones. "I may not know what they're for, but they stay with me."

"The others don't know about them?" Elise rubbed her cheek against his t-shirt, breathing in his scent.

"Yeah, they do," he informed her, as he wrapped a lock of her hair around his finger, "but I stashed the stuff a long time ago. Pissed 'em off, but I never trusted them enough to let them lay a hand on any of it."

Elise took the metal book, and turned the cover back, gazing at the page.

"Symbols," she said in a soft, low voice as she ran the tips of her fingers over them. After a moment, she turned the page.

"Hieroglyphics," she whispered, flipping to the next page.

"Funky alien writing," when more of the same was revealed. Another page turned.

"Chicken scratch," she said in quiet frustration, closing the book in a slightly irritated motion.

Zan chose that moment to let out a snort of amused laughter. Elise turned to look down at him, sprawled in his seat. He was awake, his face was turned towards her, laughter dancing in his amber eyes. She stuck her tongue out at him, getting a little breathless at seeing them darken just slightly.

"What?" she said in a low whisper, not wanting to draw attention to them.

"Never mind," he grinned. "You can look at that all day, and nothing gonna come to you. Trust me. Been trying off and on for years now."

"Well, it's obviously some sort of language," Elise flipped thru the few metal pages again. "You know," she informed him, "pictures might help."

Zan raised his eyebrow in question, as he sat up a little straighter.

"Pictures ... illustrations, something beyond this unreadable, meaningless mess," she huffed.

Zan reached out and closed the metal book, gesturing for her to put it away. When she did, he pulled her close and she rested her head on his chest, listening to his beating heart and allowing herself to be soothed. Zan knew that she was frustrated, a feeling he was well acquainted with when it came to these mysterious pieces of their now-shared alien past.

"How are we ever going to figure out what it all means?" she asked, closing her eyes as the motion of the bus and Zan's warmth lulled her.

"Don't know," he shrugged. "We've been learning some things. Can't do more than what we're doing now. But, I think that the key is you," he said seriously, running his thumb over the freckles on her cheekbone.

Elise nodded her head, knowing he was right. They had what he'd learned from Ava, and they had what was developing between them, their bond having limitless possibilities. And there could well be some answers in her murky past. Once again, she could feel her life path splinter off into a totally new direction. Searching for her roots would mean leaving her skating behind, something that was still her greatest source of self-expression, but not what she wanted to do with her life. It would also mean that her plans of always living close to her parents and brothers would probably fall by the wayside too. Elise got a little tearful, thinking that she missed them already. This would turn into a quest that she and Zan would undertake together, and it was wrenching and scary and wonderful all at the same time.

And the last miles between Elise and her home silently rolled by.

[Realistic Dreamer]

Gentle Readers ...

I'm sorry that it's been so long. I had some health problems, along with a hospital stay that was just outrageously expensive, and I'm only now finally getting back into the swing of things.

First of all, thanks to everyone who voted for Zan as the best dupe. It was wonderful to find out that we took runner-up in that category.

It's going to be rather undramatic for awhile, but Elise is going to learn more about her past, and she'll have to make some decisions regarding her future. And we all know where her future lies, now don't we?

As always, I'd love to hear what you think.


Chapter 46

Dave and Karen Ryan sat in the waiting room of the bus station, watching their two sons divide their time between sitting beside them, chattering endlessly about their sister's imminent return, and going to the windows to look out, anxious to spot the bus before anyone else did.

While Matthew tried to project the cool demeanor only a 12 year old could, Mikey was clearly excited, and didn't care who knew it.

"When's Lisa gonna get here, Mom?" he ran back to ask Karen for what seemed like the 100th time.

"The bus is due about 8:00, so judging by the time," she glanced at her watch, "it should be here any minute," her voice carried the tones of a mother whose patience was beginning to wear thin. She gave him a verbal nudge. "Why don't you go check out the window again," she urged.

"Okay," Mikey took off.

At his mother's slight nod in his brother's direction, Matthew followed more slowly. He picked up right away on her unspoken cue for him to try and distract his sibling, the rolling of his eyes clearly asking "why me?" Karen leaned against her husband with a sigh.

"Tell me again why we thought it was a good idea to bring them along?" she asked.

"Because we never would have gotten out the house without them," Dave chuckled as he put his arm around her. "You know how much they've missed Lisa, and they just want to be the first ones she sees when she gets off the bus. Her and that boyfriend of hers," his voice got a little tight at the reference to Zan. "What's this kid's name again?"

"Zan, Dave," Karen was exasperated. "His name is Zan. Say it with me, now."

"Yeah, yeah. I can remember his name," Dave was unamused. "What I don't understand is how my little girl can be gone for a just over two months and manage to think she's fallen in love."

"Dave, she's serious about this," Karen told him, pulling back to look up into her husband's face. "We have to be careful," she warned, "because from what I've heard from her over the phone, she's rock solid about how she feels. If we approach this wrong, it'll backfire right in our faces."

"But, she hardly knows him at all," her husband argued.

"She's known him longer than I knew you," Karen turned to pierce him with a steady gaze, "before you asked me to marry you. I'd think you would understand completely, being the 8-day wonder that you were," she couldn't resist teasing.

"That was different," Dave huffed, clearly annoyed at being backed into a corner by the truth and not being able to come up with a credible response.

"Uh huh," she snickered.

"They're here, they're here," Mikey exclaimed, turning his head over his shoulder to see if he'd gotten his parents' attention. "Can I go out there? Everyone's starting to get off."

At his mother's nod of approval, along with the standard "watch for cars" warning, he was out the door, racing across the parking lot to meet his sister. Matthew followed more slowly, but his pace betrayed that he, too, was eager to see Elise.

Karen and Dave rose from their seats, walking to the window to gaze across the brightly lit parking lot. The boys were standing next to the bus, watching each passenger disembark. When Elise stepped off, Mikey launched himself at her, giving her a tremedous hug which was returned with equal enthusiasm. She held her hand out to Matthew, and he slid his palm across hers. Elise knew better than to hug him in public, his 12 year old dignity being a formidible thing. As her parents watched with fond smiles, Zan got off the bus and stood next to Elise, slinging a casual arm around her shoulders. Dave's smile faded.

"I'll lock her up in her room," he said in a faint voice, taking in the spiked hair, piercings and colorful bruises covering the left side of Zan's face. He wore a battered leather jacket with a hooded sweatshirt underneath to protect against the cold, low-hanging cargo pants and a pair of worn boots.

"You can't," Karen's tone held a mix of amusement and irritation. Hadn't he heard a word she'd just said?

"I think I should," Dave gestured out the window, watching his darling daughter gaze up into Zan's face with a happy smile. His lips tightened as Zan bent his head to give Elise a kiss, before picking up their bags and starting toward the terminal.

Karen turned to her husband and grabbed him by the shoulders, realizing that there wasn't much time before her offspring and one on-approval boyfriend would be coming through the doors.

"Dave, repeat after me ... I promise to give Zan every chance to impress me," she leveled him with a stern glare.

Her husband opened his mouth to protest, and then snapped it shut again when he saw that Karen was serious. After a few moments of what his wife could only call pouting, he gave in to the inevitable.

"I promise to give Zan every chance to impress me," he said with extreme reluctance.

"I will keep an open mind about him dating my daughter," she said, turning her head to take a quick glance out the windows. They were getting close.

"I will keep an open mind about him dating my daughter," Dave dutifully repeated.

"And I swear on pain of death I will not take him out into the woods, kill him, and bury him in a shallow grave," she finished.

"Damn," he groused.

"Say it," Karen commanded, as she shook him a bit.

"And I swear on pain of death I will not take him out into the woods, kill him, and bury him in a shallow grave," he sighed.

"So help you God," she hurried to finish as she saw the doors about to swing open.

"So help me God," Dave nodded in agreement. "Happy?"

"Ecstatic," Karen replied before she spun around, putting a quick welcoming smile on her face, her husband standing right behind her. Dave stepped up a little closer to put his arm around her waist, leaning close to murmur in her ear.

"You know, your father made my life pretty darn uncomfortable when I first starting dating you. I don't see why I should let this kid get off so easy," he complained. "I had to work to earn your dad's approval, and I've been waiting for my turn to pay it forward, so to speak."

"Yeah, well who do you think it was that kept my dad from burying you in that shallow grave?" she turned her head to whisper in return. "My mom says he had the shotgun all loaded and waiting, before she talked him out of it," she raised an eyebrow. "Just be fair to Zan, okay?"

There was no chance for him to respond, before Elise, Zan and the boys were standing in front of them. Elise held tightly to Zan's hand as she put her free arm around her mother in a big hug.

"Mom, it's so good to be home. I missed you," she said in a happy voice. She moved away from Karen to give her father the same embrace. "Hi, Daddy," she whispered.

After a moment, she stepped back, her smile luminous. She moved closer to Zan and made the introductions.

"Mom, Dad, I want you to meet Zan," she said. "Zan, this is my mom and dad. And these two guys are Matthew and Mikey."

Karen was the first to express her greetings, welcoming him to their town. She then moved back a few paces, both to watch the interactions between everyone, and to study this boy that her daughter had given her heart to. She wasn't at all put off by his appearance. Never being one to base her opinion on what was on the outside, she easily looked beyond the things that most people wouldn't see past. And she liked what she saw. Zan's stance was loose and easy, but he carried himself confidently. His gaze was steady and respectful as he acknowledged the introductions. He was polite, yet there was almost a regal air about him. Karen could see a bit of a challenge in her husband's eyes, especially when he dropped his stare momentarily to Zan and Elise's clasped hands, but Zan didn't release his grip. He merely straightened a bit more, and his gaze didn't falter at all. Her husband was behaving very well, but she could see he wasn't going to make it easy, either.

As she continued to try and get a handle on her first impressions, she was a little startled when she looked at her older son. He was standing rather close, not to his sister's side, but to Zan's. Karen had seen this before, usually when Matthew was experimenting with clothes or his hair, as every 12 year old does. It was his "don't say anything, or make a big deal out of it, but I want you to notice me" look. If she wasn't mistaken, her son had just found himself a role model. Oh boy.

Mikey was easy to read. He was just happy that Elise was home, and he was chattering away, telling her all about school and hockey and his friends. As far as Karen could tell, Zan hadn't really registered too much on his radar yet.

"Well, let's get this show on the road," she said, thinking it was time to get everyone moving along. "I have a roast in the oven, and I need to get back to help Grandma with supper."

"Grandma Jo is here?" Elise's smile got wider and she turned to Zan. "I can't wait for you to meet her. She's an artist, and just about the coolest person ever."

Zan grinned at her exuberance, and he reached for their bags. He turned to Matthew, holding out Elise's small duffle.

"Matt, you wanna help?" he asked in all seriousness.

Matthew's eyes lit up, and he eagerly took the bag that he would never have considered carrying under any other circumstances.

"Yeah," he shouldered it and thrust his hands in his pockets, ready to leave.

Karen's estimation of Zan shot right up at that little interaction between them. She wasn't sure that the boy knew that Matthew already seemed to look up to him, but what just happened pleased her immensely. She and Dave began to herd everyone toward the exit.

Being the last to leave the building, Dave held the door for his wife, allowing her to go through first.

"Tattoos, you think?" he asked as Karen passed him.

"Not a doubt in my mind," she grinned.

[Realistic Dreamer]

Best Dupe Fanfiction
Best Portrayal of a Dupe


Gentle Readers ... I'm so thrilled by this. I want to thank everyone who voted for this fic and this Zan. It's amazing to me, how much you've taken him to your heart.

Now, on to the state of the nation. I haven't forgotten this. I really haven't. I'm stuck. I have a writer's block like you wouldn't believe right now. And, adding to that, is the fact that work absolutely owns my life. I'm usually putting in between 10-12 hour days, and I'm frankly just fried when I get home. I swear, if I didn't like eating and sleeping indoors so much, I'd quit. Funny, Johnny Paycheck is singing in my ears ... "take this job and shove it." This next week looks to be the worst yet.

The good news is that I go on vacation right after that. No computer, but I'm taking along a pen and a notebook, and I'm going to be trying to get something on paper. It's weird to think that I'm referring to this in my mind as doing it manually. Still, I have a solid week in a rustic cabin with no tv, but a killer lake view, up in the UP.

I hope this isn't against the rules, but if you want to see at least some of what I'll be looking at, go here:

http://www.pasty.com/bridge/bridge_picture.asp

Thanks again from the bottom of my heart for the votes and the support. It means everything to me.