Echo (M/L - Adult) (Complete)

[To_Kiss_A_Frog]

Winner - Round 9



Title: Echo
Rating: Adult
Disclaimer: I don't own anything you recognize.
Pairing: CC
Summary: She was young, he was unstable and together, they were volatile. Now, years later, the two come together one more time and have to put aside their past in order to do what they do best… make music.

A/N:Hello everyone! I decided to post this here since I already have 16 chapter written. If you would like to read ahead, I have eleven posted at Roswellian Chronicles and more to come. I haven't abandoned any of my other fics, I'm still working on them but this fic is almost entirely written so updates won't be a problem. Enjoy


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Chapter 1 - I'm Okay



<center>Punk queen, Liz Parker, who has recently hung up her ripped jeans for Dolce & Gabbana is now heading into the studio to record her first solo album. Miss Parker, who has been a member of the Four Square Record Label going on seven years will now try her hand with Antarian Records and their hot young producer, former boyfriend, Max Evans.

Evans, who once fronted the hit heavy band, Livien, is said to be the best on staff and the most logical choice to work with Parker. While dating, the two were said to have collaborated numerous times and though many believe their relationship ended on bad terms after Evans’ stint with drugs, Antarian Records President, Brody Davis insists there are no hard feelings between the two. He is quoted saying “The past is the past. If they can leave it there then so can you.”

Now only time will tell if America’s most remembered musical duo has really put the past behind them.</center>


“Was I naïve to think the press wouldn’t make such a big deal about this?” Liz sighed and tossed the latest issue of Rolling Stone aside. Almost instantly, Alex reached for the discarded magazine and couldn’t help but laugh at the glossy pictures printed alongside the article. “What in the hell are you laughing at?” she demanded and watched her long time friend roll around on the floor in hysterics.

“Sorry… sorry” Alex breathed out as he attempted to calm his racing heart. “It’s just… well you were a really bad dresser back then” he said and held up the two page photo spread. “Seriously, Lizzie… you’re hair was so red it was almost orange” he pointed out, referring to a pic of Liz on stage at the tender age of seventeen. Back then she had no idea what a stylist was and figured there was no point going to a hair dresser when she could just dye her hair herself.

“At least I had an excuse… its called adolescence” Liz retorted and slapped the article away. “I was seventeen but you, my friend, were old enough to know that Buddy Holly glasses and a cowlick weren’t the epitome of style.”

“Burn!” Kyle intervened from where he lay on Liz’s overstuffed couch. “She’s got you there, Whitman.”

“This coming from a guy who still wears his high school letterman jacket” Alex fired back as his pregnant wife waddled through the door. “Hey, I thought you were supposed to be resting” he said and instantly rose to guide Isabel to the nearest chair. Though she was only six months along, the fact that she was carrying twins made her look a lot closer to her due date than she actually was.

“If you had your way I’d sleep my way through this pregnancy” Isabel stated and reached out to smack Kyle on the leg. “And you… quit making fun of my husband” she warned, using her patented Ice Princess glare. Kyle, who opened his mouth to argue that Liz had started it, quickly shut it when he noticed the no nonsense look she was sporting. Dejected, he nodded once and closed his eyes again, ignoring the quiet snickers coming from both Alex and Liz.

After seven years of playing together in the hit band, Echo… Alex, Kyle, Liz and their lead guitar player, Jesse had all developed a close kinship. The four were more like siblings than band mates, thus Kyle knew better than to argue with Isabel, much less now that she was pregnant.

“So the press is going to town with your decision, huh?” Isabel surmised as she spied the copy of Rolling Stone, lying haphazardly on the rug. “Are up sure you’re up to working with him again, Lizzie?”

“I don’t have much of a choice, do I?” Liz shrugged and tried to push down the nervous butterflies that had once again taken up flight inside her stomach. “I signed a contract with Whirlwind Recording so when Antarian Records bought them out, they gained control of that contract. I can’t change that… even if I wanted to.”

“Tess tried looking for some sort of loophole but she couldn’t find one” Kyle added, referring to his girlfriend Tessa Harding who had been managing Echo since they first got signed, seven years before.

“Well I’m starved… who’s up for Chinese takeout?” Liz queried, hoping to deflect their attention to a safer topic. The last thing she needed was to overanalyze her past and near future. She had done enough of that over the last three years and she was tired of worrying over Maxwell Evans. “Right now I’d kill from some sweet and sour pork” she added and looked around at her friends expectantly.

“I’m in” Kyle was first to volunteer and dug inside his pants pocket for a cell phone. “Speed dial #3” he stated, drawing raised eyebrows from the group. “What… I know my priorities. Tess, Liz… China Town.”

Rolling her eyes, Isabel reached for the phone and quickly began spouting off her order while Liz excused herself to the bathroom. Behind closed doors, she exhaled a deep breath and slowly walked up to the vanity. There she saw dark circles beneath her eyes, betraying her lack of sleep and long nights spent tossing and turning. When she did finally manage to find a few minutes of rest, her dreams were usually plagued by forgotten memories of the past.

Since their split, Liz sporadically had nights where she relived the time they spent together but lately those dreams were coming every night. It had been that way for two weeks, since she found out the recording company that had signed her on to do a solo album was being bought out.

Antarian Records was a big time label and she was guaranteed a lot of PR along with the best sound techs but Liz feared the price would be too high.

Three years since they last spoke… three years since the fateful day she last spoke to Maria and cut off all her ties to Livien and Max Evans. For a year afterwards she would wonder whether or not she had made the right decision. At the time, Liz was still so young and still naïve in so many ways. After her life had quickly spiraled out of control, she tried grasping onto anything that would ground her and unfortunately that meant letting go of the one person she needed the most.

Since that day, he had been in and out of the papers for one thing or another. With his talent and rugged good looks he had always been an easy target for the media, eventually they both were but since that day, the stories they told had turned. Some speculated on both their lives, on what finally drove them apart but even their wildest imaginations couldn’t come up with an accurate enough account. Liz could admit she was grateful for that.

“Sweetie… you know I love you but I really have to go to the bathroom and I am not walking up a flight of stairs to use the one up there.”

Shaking the cobwebs from her mind, Liz quickly splashed some cold water on her face and hurriedly dabbed at the drops with a towel. “Sorry” she apologized when she pulled the door open and met Isabel’s concerned gaze on the other side. “It’s all yours. I’m fine” she added when Isabel opened her mouth to ask. “Really.”

“Okay” Isabel relented, knowing that Liz was the Fort Knox of emotions. “Now get of my way” she added and lightly shoved Liz aside.

“What do you know about catching tail? You’ve been married to Isabel since you were like five” Jesse argued and shook his head when Kyle and Alex both started talking at once. Groaning quietly, Liz bypassed the living room and headed into the kitchen for a tall glass of water.

Over the years, the band made it a habit of congregating at Liz’s house whenever they had free time. She knew it was because she was the youngest in the group at twenty three and without a boyfriend or any family around, the guys often worried about her. While it could be endearing at times, others she just wanted a little peace and quiet. Unfortunately, now was one of those moments though she was loathsome to kick anyone out, especially since Isabel had made the trip with Alex this time around.

After taking a long swig of water, Liz plastered on a smile and went to greet Jesse, the fourth band mate who had obviously just arrived.


~&~&~&~&~&


“That chord progression is a little awkward” he said, drawing Liz’s attention away from her guitar fret. Looking up, she found herself staring at a musician she had admired since his debut album two years before. “And you should watch the noise when you slide” he advised and straddled a chair in front of her stand. “Max Evans.”

Blinking back her surprise, Liz noticed his outstretched hand and quickly placed her smaller one in his. “L…Liz Parker” she stuttered and looked away when he merely grinned at her.

“It’s a good song, though. Do write your own stuff?” he asked and plucked at the sheet of guitar chords and song lyrics.

“Sort of” Liz answered and noticed his uncertain expression. “I write it but there always seems to be one part, either music or words, that I can’t quiet get right so Tess is always getting someone in to fix or change it” she explained and blushed when she realized she was rambling. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be” Max replied and waved it off. “May I?” he asked and held his hands out for the guitar.

“Sure” Liz said and passed along her old acoustic. Curiously, she watched him play around with her tuning, mesmerized by the way he closed his eyes and just listened for the right sound. She had an ear for voices, could pin point any tone or pitch but the sounds a guitar made were something she worked hard to learn. Max, on the other hand, seemed to be a natural when it came to finding the right chords… finding the perfect sound to accompany a voice.

Proof enough came moments later when he flawlessly began to play her song. “Why don’t you start a few lines before the chorus” he advised as his fingers gracefully moved over the strings.

“There’s nothing but the rain…. No footsteps on the ground…. I’m listening, but there’s no sound” Liz sang and pushed past her nervousness when she looked up and found Max’s eyes staring back at hers.

“Isn’t anyone trying to find me? Won’t somebody come take me home…. It’s that damn cold night…. Trying to figure out this life…. Won’t you, take me by the hand, take me somewhere new? I don’t know who you are but I… I’m with you…. I’m with you.”

The fluid sound of the guitar faded away as Max’s fingers stilled over the strings. “You have a great voice, Parker” he complimented and handed her guitar back when he found Sean, his bass player, standing in the doorway. “Listen, I gotta jet but do me a favor and don’t let Tess change any of that. It’s perfect the way it is” he said and disappeared from the room before Liz could get her wits back to thank him.

Like a splash of cold water in her face, Liz was abruptly pulled from her dream by the insistent ring of her alarm clock. Blindly, she shot her hand out to hit the snooze button and closed her eyes to ward off the last remaining vestiges of the dream. “Get it together, Parker” she coached and held her hand against her chest in the hopes of stilling her racing heart.

Briefly, she glanced at the window where the morning sun was already peeking over the horizon. Its bright rays drifted through the curtains, causing Liz to roll over and hold a pillow over her head. She wasn’t ready to get up yet, wasn’t ready to face the world yet and most of all, was not ready to face Max Evans yet… if ever.


~&~&~&~&~&


After a stiff cup of coffee and more coaching, Liz grabbed her keys and headed out the door. Her meeting was scheduled for 9AM and if she hurried, she might even be a few minutes early, Liz thought as she strolled into her garage and picked out a car to drive.

Alex and Jesse had always found it amusing that Liz owned almost a dozen cars. Both men believed flashy cars and custom wheels were a man’s obsession, not one that fit a 5’2 woman that walked around in heels. Yet Liz enjoyed variety and had even had her vehicles proudly displayed on a special episode of Cribs. “Hello” she answered a moment later when her cell phone began to ring.

After dropping her keys twice, Liz finally climbed inside her Viper and gunned the engine a couple times just to hear it purr. “Stop playing with your toys and pay attention” Tess snapped in irritation. “This morning I went through your modified contract once more, this time with a fine toothed comb and I found something. Were you aware that there is a tiny little clause at the bottom of the contract that says I am not allowed to sit in during any of your writing sessions?” she questioned.

Liz could imagine her manager, hand on hip, tapping her foot with a look of annoyance on her face. It was a pose she had taken more and more over the years though Liz believed Tess only acted superior in hopes that everyone else would see her that way as well.

“You don’t say” she answered and pretended to mull it over. “Well it’s like you said, that thing is iron clad so there isn’t much we can do about it now” Liz said and tried to keep the amusement out of her voice. She knew, without having to ask, that Max had been the one to add that clause. He had never particularly liked Tess nor did he agree with any of changes she was constantly trying to make.

“Look, if you want to stay pissed at me for something that happened years ago, fine but this is your career you’re fucking with” Tess argued. “Just make sure your pill boy doesn’t screw you over” she said and snapped her phone shut before Liz had the opportunity to respond.

Eyes blazing and temper flaring, Liz threw her cell phone into her purse and punched the gas. Image after image flooded her mind as she sped down the open road, trying to assuage the anger pulsing threw her veins. She could hardly believe that after all this time Tess still believed she had done the right thing and refused to accept any blame for the part she played. If anyone had screwed with Liz, it had been her authority wielding manager yet the blonde still didn’t see it.

Shifting into overdrive, Liz continued to gain speed as it all came flooding back.

[To_Kiss_A_Frog]

Thanks everyone for your feedback!! I'm glad you liked the beginning. The song used in this chapter is Broken by Seether and Amy of Evanescence. Thanks to:

POM
DMartinez
pandas2001
anonymousarfan
Morning Dreamgirl
begonia9508
Emz80m
flohmac
Tinkerbell_Luvs_Roswell
believer_evans
trulov



Chapter 2 - Broken

“How could you, Liz?! After all this time, how could you throw it all away and not even show up?” Maria demanded, causing Liz to hold the phone away from her ear. “God, I really needed you… you, the one person who could understand exactly what I was going through but you just… disappeared and didn’t even bother to call” she fumed as Liz tried to make sense of her friend’s words.

“Maria, what in the hell are you talking about?” Liz questioned when she was finally able to get a word in.

“Don’t play dumb with me. Just admit that you didn’t have the decency to show up because of your latest drama with Max” Maria all but screeched though there was something different about this rant than the usual one. Liz could swear Maria was almost hysterical and quickly grew worried as her friend continued to ramble on about some sin she believed Liz committed.

“Maria, slow down” Liz intervened. “Now tell me, what happened. What didn’t I show up for?” she asked though no amount of bracing could have prepared her for the answer she received.

“Miss Parker, right on time” the receptionist greeted the moment the elevator beeped and the doors opened. Politely, she held her hand out to receive Liz’s jacket and led her down a long corridor lined with awards and platinum records. “Mr. Evans and Ms. Harding are already waiting inside” she added and pointed to a door marked ‘Conference.’

Liz realized the room must have been sound proofed when she pushed it open and found Max and Tess, standing on opposing sides of the table, locked in a heated discussion.

He looked so much like he had the last time they saw one another, she thought. His hair was still long, his body still toned and muscled but his chin was now speckled with a five o’clock shadow. He looked healthier too, more like the Max Evans she first met on tour, rather than the Max Evans she pushed out of her life three years before.

Lost in her thoughts, it was only the sound of their ongoing argument that brought Liz out of her musings. “I don’t give a fuck if Brody has confidence in you. I think you’re a hack who’s only going to play with Liz a little more until she breaks completely” Tess hissed and all but clawed at him. While it wasn’t a scene Liz hadn’t witnessed before it was unexpected, especially since she believed Tess wouldn’t be attending her meeting.

“I see the two of you are getting along famously” Liz said when Max opened his mouth to retort. Instantly, his eyes snapped towards her, holding her gaze for a fraction of a moment before he returned his angry stare to Tess.

“I was just making sure the addict could control at least one addiction” Tess shot at Max and smirked when his jaw clenched angrily.

“Out” Liz ordered and stepped away from the door. “We have a lot of writing to do” she added and watched Tess’ smirk transform into a scowl at the mention of song writing. While her manager had more than enough ammunition to keep hitting Max with cheap shots, Tess couldn’t insult her way into the meeting when legally, she had no right to stay.

“Fine… just remember what I said… both of you” Tess replied and flounced out of the room like the Queen of Sheba.

“Nice to see some things never change… Tess is still a bitch that makes Satan look like the archangel he once was” Max said once he and Liz were alone.

His voice almost sounded foreign to Liz as the rich sound washed over her. It had been so long since she’d heard his smooth tones that it took a moment to realize what he said and another moment after that to laugh out loud. “Yeah… I guess you can always count on Tess to piss you off” she agreed because she didn’t know what else to say.

Liz couldn’t remember that last time she had been nervous around Max. After they began dating and even a little before, he made an effort to always make her feel at ease around him. “Forget who I am on stage because off it… I’m still just Max” he used to say. He wasn’t like Rath who believed she was too young and immature to talk to. He didn’t treat her like Michael, a distraction that would end up becoming a problem if encouraged. He hadn’t been like Sean either who spent the first three weeks of touring trying to find a way into her pants.

No, Max hadn’t fit into any category and had never underestimated Liz just because she was younger than everyone else. It was why she almost felt guilty now because of her nervousness and uncertainty around him.

“You look good… grown up” Max said when the silence became too much for both.

“Thanks” Liz said, awkwardly. “You too… good, I mean, not grown up” she stammered and bit her lip in embarrassment. “So… should we get started?”

“First I wanted to clear some things up” Max replied and gestured for her to take a seat. He waited until Liz was settled in before taking the chair across from her. “The way things ended between us… well it’s definitely not something I’m proud of. I hate what I did to you. I hate that so much of it is still fuzzy to me but I just… I guess I just want to say I’m sorry.” Awkwardly, he cleared his throat and toyed with a pencil as Liz searched her mind for something to say.

“I had an idea for one of the songs. I was thinking along the lines of a…”

“Of a dance around the issue” Max interrupted and accepted the glare she shot him. “Come on, Parker. Accept my apology or not but don’t ignore it” he said and met her gaze head on. For a split second, Liz forgot where she was and felt even angrier when the room swam back into focus again.

“Come on, Evans” Liz mocked and turned when a frown tugged at his lips. “We’re not here to rehash our past or make amends for any of it. We’re here because I signed a contract and your boss thought this would be an interesting way to drum up publicity” she bit out. “I’m not the naïve teenager you met all those years ago, Max. I know the business well enough to realize exactly why Brody paired the two of us together.”

“He put us together because he knows our history… as song writers” Max corrected and began pacing around the room like a caged animal. “Damn it, Parker. This isn’t what I wanted. I don’t want it hanging over us like an elephant in the room that everyone sees but no one’s willing to mention. If you have something to say to me then say it. Don’t hold it in. I can handle your words and I can even handle your disdain but I can’t deal with this robot you’re pretending to be.”

“Well then that’s just too damn bad” Liz stated and closed her eyes to ward of the gnawing pain in her chest. “There isn’t anything in this world that can erase what happened… but I can’t remember that, I can’t let myself remember it. It just… it’s still too much.” The admittance cost her a small crack in her roughened veneer but the words had to be said.

“Some of us don’t have a choice” Max replied.

“Well you only have yourself to blame for that” Liz retorted and snapped her mouth shut when the urge to immediately apologize bubbled forth.

“Fair enough. We’ll shelve it… for now” said Max who reached for Liz’s guitar case and headed towards the door. With confusion in her eyes, Liz followed him back down the hall to a small recording studio.

The tech was nowhere to be found and everything had a thin coat of dust over it but Liz would have recognized the room with her eyes closed. The outside had changed but this hadn’t. Liz couldn’t decide whether or not that was a good thing. “Just pull the covers off the chairs and find some place to sit” he directed, reminding Liz that her surprise had led her in front of him.

Nodding, Liz accepted her guitar case and pulled at several sheets of cloth, revealing stools and a music stand. She wondered if anything had been moved since the last time and felt a momentary pang at the thought that it had all been left their way.

When Max reappeared, he was toting his old acoustic guitar. It looked slightly battered with a few extra scars but Liz could tell he had recently replaced the strings. She found herself wondering if he still woke up in the middle of the night with a song in his head. Did he still keep the guitar by the bed and a pad of paper on the night stand? Did he still refuse to sleep until the chords were just right and until he found words to perfectly compliment them?

“Since your sound has matured a lot over the years, I was thinking we could try something a bit more progressive” Max said as he rested the guitar against his leg. Without asking, he reached for Liz’s instrument again and began tuning it to his liking. Liz was momentarily struck by how familiar everything felt. For a nagging moment, she questioned whether or not she really had the strength to go through with it all.

“Thanks” she said when he handed the guitar back and produced a pick from his back pocket. “Since when do we use picks?” she inquired and sucked in a breath as he smiled at the question. Liz couldn’t remember the last time he had done that.

“Since now” Max answered. Had it been anyone else, even her band mates, Liz would have questioned him but when it came to music, she never questioned Max. When they first began touring together, Liz used to hide in the shadows of the rehearsal room and watch him practice. He knew every time change, every chord progression and every beat to each song he played. Livien used to say that Max had a sixth sense when he held a guitar in his hand and more often than not, Liz wholeheartedly agreed.

Their time apart and all the heartache hadn’t diminished the confidence she had in him as a musician.

“So what kind of song were you thinking of?”

“Do you remember that charity benefit of 2000?” Max asked and watched realization dawn across Liz’s features. “Think you can still play your part?” he challenged as the two slipped into their roles.

“Fine… but I’m playing rhythm” Liz called and actually smiled when Max relented, agreeing to play lead. “On four.”

With her eyes closed, Liz let her fingers do the remembering as she played the intro and waited for Max’s entrance. When he did, all her previous questions were answered. His voice wasn’t raw like someone who hadn’t used it in years. His pitch was still right on key, leading Liz to believe he had never given up on his music, despite everything that had happened.

When it was her turn to sing, Liz let Max take over the rhythm and didn’t bother to be surprised at how seamlessly he did it. “The worst is over now and we can breathe again…. I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away…. There’s so much left to learn, and no one left to fight…. I wanna hold you high and steal your pain”

It was the first song they ever completely wrote together. Liz remembered the late night they spent locked up in his hotel room, tossing around ideas for hours until they finally found the perfect duet. From that point on, the music seemed to pour from their hearts as they told a story dear to both. They brought the house down the night they performed it with both their bands quietly playing together in the background.

“Cause I’m broken when I’m open…. And I don’t feel like I am strong enough…. Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome…. And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away” they sang together while their memories filled in the sounds of a bass guitar and drums. For a brief moment, nothing else existed except the beautiful sounds flowing between the two musicians.

“You’ve gone away, you don’t feel me… anymore” Max whispered as Liz allowed her fingers to flutter away from the strings.

“It’s different than I remember” Liz murmured, thinking back to the countless shows Max performed. The crowd would call for more until two encores had passed and they still weren’t ready to go home. Then Max would call for Liz. He’d bring her on stage and together, the two regaled the audience with the music they wrote. Sometimes it was Broken other times it was something else they had been working on.

The crowd ate up every second the two spent sharing the stage.

“Your voice is stronger now” Max replied and pulled the music stand in front of him. With his hand flying across the blank page of sheet music, he scrawled several notes as Liz watched him work. When he was positive he had the part right, he would look up and ask her to lend the words. It was a routine she knew well but again, Liz was uneasy at how familiar it all was. “Have you written any new stuff lately? For you, I mean… not Echo.”

“Nothing I’ve finished” Liz answered, thinking of the notebook she left at home, filled with incomplete sheets of music and half written lyrics. At the time, it had been a therapeutic outlet to vent out her frustrations. It was her way of saying all the words she had been unable to say to anyone else.

“Bring whatever you have next time and we can sift through it” Max advised and held out a sheet for her to inspect. “Does this do anything for you?” he asked.

“Hmm…” Liz hummed along with the notes when an idea struck her. “Try converting the intro to piano instead” she suggested and plucked the pencil from his hand to jot down a few changes. “Right before the hook, we could do a little feature and then lead in with a strong solo into the vocals. Keep the drums low to make it into a ballad but build them up just before the final chorus” she mused and mentally went over all the lyrics she had, trying to decide whether or not any would suit the music.

After a few more minutes of back and forth, Max went to make a copy of the music and handed one to Liz. “Try rhythm for now and see how it feels” he said and took his sheet to the piano. “I’ll start and you can come in whenever you feel comfortable.”

Nodding, Liz turned in her stool to face Max who closed his eyes and began to play the first notes.

[To_Kiss_A_Frog]

A/N: Hi everyone! Thanks for the feedback! The song used in this chapter is Numb by Linkin Park.

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Morning Dreamgirl
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behrlyliz

Chapter 3 - Numb

All talking at once, congratulating one another, the members of Livien and Echo hurried off stage and basked in their success. The benefit patrons were still raucously cheering them on as the host tried to get their attention again. “What a rush” Alex breathed out and opened his arms to Isabel who hurtled herself at him.

“Oh my god! You’re guys were amazing” Maria complimented and pulled both Michael and Sean into proud hugs.

“And did you see some of the women out there?” Jesse asked and gave a low whistle. “Tonight is definitely going to be a good night” he boasted while Rath and Kyle both agreed and high fived each other.

“Great job everybody” Tess called out as she stepped forward, grinning briefly at Kyle who was too busy staring out the curtain at the lavishly dressed women. “You’ve all been invited to an after party at the Beverly Wilshire and… wait a minute, where did Max and Liz go?” she demanded and searched around for the missing singers.

“Shh…” Max coaxed as he and Liz snuck out into one of the dressing rooms. The sound of her manager’s voice carried down the corridors, causing both to snicker quietly at her irritated tone. “In here” he said and pulled Liz behind the closed the door. “Have I told you beautiful you look?” he asked and wasted no time fusing his lips against hers.

Emitting a quiet moan, Liz grabbed onto the lapels of his jacket and tried to get closer. Hands resting on her hips, Max pulled Liz up against his body and groaned at the feel of her lithe form wiggling around. “What do you mean you haven’t seen them?! They need to be out there to take a final bow with all the other performers” Tess screeched at someone outside their door, effectively bringing the pair out of their sexual haze.

“I swear, that woman’s voice cuts through my head like nails” Max groaned in Liz’s ear, tickling her skin with his warm breath.

“I guess we should get back out there” Liz suggested, defeated.

“Hey, listen for a second” Max said and tipped her chin up so that their gazes locked. “I hate this too… but until you turn eighteen, we have to keep it a secret. Both our labels would try to split the tour to keep us apart if they found out.”

“I know” Liz agreed and sighed quietly.

“Come here” Max gently demanded and held her close so that her head rested against his chest. “Just a few more months” he whispered and stroked her back, soothing Liz more with his presence than with his words.

As her eyes fluttered open, Liz didn’t bother to look at the clock as she reached for a pencil and her lyric book.

It was the same each night only this time, Liz decided to use her memories. They had always been the story she told through song but after everything with Max, she had been loathsome to put herself out there again so personally. Music had become what her band wanted, what their fans liked, not what was in her heart.

Liz decided she couldn’t do that anymore with her solo album. It had to be about her… had to come from her.

Your face it haunts…. My once pleasant dreams…. Your voice it chased away…. All the sanity in me.

“There” she said and tossed the items aside. After snuggling back under the comforter, Liz shut the lamp off and tried to get a few more hours of sleep.


~&~&~&~&~&~


<center>Is the Past Proving too much for Parker??</center>

Sources say Liz Parker, front woman for hit band Echo, has been spending a lot of late nights worrying over her afternoons spent in the studio with former boyfriend, Max Evans. The pair, who split three year ago, have been putting in long hours trying to write the tracks for Parker’s new solo album. Spokesmen for Antarian Records say the album is coming along in record time and should be expected out this spring. The question which remains to be unasked is whether or not the pair, who are famously known for their heartfelt lyrics and melodic music, can get through this album without once again falling under the spell of their music……………….


“Forget about the tabloids. All they’re interested in is selling papers not printing actual truths” Lonnie advised and waved away the latest issue of “In Touch” Magazine. “Now I’ve got you lined up for Jimmy Kimmel on Thursday, an Oprah taping Friday morning and a Cosmo cover shoot scheduled for Sunday afternoon. I’m also penciling Echo in to do the annual Children’s Hospital Benefit” she added, all the while pecking at her palm pilot like an overexcited chicken.

“It’s not… entirely… untrue” Liz admitted and watched her long time friend look up with a sympathetic expression adorning her face.

Three years before, the only people who knew anything about Liz’s breakup with Max had been Tess and Lonnie. Tess made it her job to know everything about her clients and passed that information along to Lonnie, whose job as publicist was to keep their names clean.

Sometimes it meant having them deeper inside her personal life than even her friends were but in a way, it was also liberating. Lonnie wasn’t there to judge and had never tried to either. She simply listened to the story she was told and found every possible way to either keep it quiet or to fix it in the eyes of the press. She was the one person that Liz actually confided in when she began to lose her direction after the whole ordeal.

“I know your heart still has scars but don’t be ashamed of them” Lonnie said and placed her palm pilot aside. “You’re human. You hurt, you bleed and most of all, you feel.”

“He scares me” Liz confessed while Lonnie’s sympathy transformed into concern. “Not like that” she quickly amended. “He scares me because I forget when I’m with him. I forget about the last year of our relationship and I just see that twenty one year old who played my guitar and said I had a great voice. I see the man I crushed on at sixteen. I see the man who kissed me like I was the most precious thing in the world on my seventeenth birthday. I forget that the other person existed at all.”

Lonnie seemed to struggle with her words before letting out a quiet sigh. “Tess would kill me for saying this but… Max isn’t a bad guy, Liz” she stated. “He made mistakes, big ones, but he paid the highest price for them. The fact that you can still look at him and see the person he once was is a true testament to what kind of man he was inside… before all that other stuff got in the way.”

Closing her eyes, Liz allowed her mind to briefly drift back to another time and place. She thought back to that last night. Everything she saw… the look in his eyes… the words she said… the fear she held inside… the anger flowing in her veins… everything. She realized then that Lonnie was right. Max wasn’t that person anymore and maybe if she finally let go of it, she could finally stop hurting.

Nodding, Liz offered Lonnie a small smile in thanks. “Right… well if you’re through with me, I have lunch with your sister” she said and gathered up her belongings. “I learned the hard way not to get in between a pregnant Isabel and food… a mistake I will never make again.”

Lonnie returned the smile with one of her own and nodded her ascent. More than once, she had been on the receiving end of Isabel’s pregnancy hormones and deeply sympathized with Liz. “See you soon” Lonnie said and accepted a peck against her cheek.

Lost in her musings, Liz rode the elevator down to the garage and only snapped out of it when she heard its loud beep. “Thank you” she said to the parking attendant who had her car ready and waiting the moment Liz stepped out of the building.


~&~&~&~&~&


“What exactly are we looking for?” Liz asked as she followed Isabel around the large record store. More than once, she tried to talk Isabel into sitting for a moment but the woman was on a mission to find the perfect birthday present for Alex. For whatever reason, she believed it was waiting for her somewhere in the music store.

“I’m not sure yet” Isabel replied, distracted. “I’ll know it when I see it.”

“You’re listening to K-Rock, 92.3FM and I’m your host Nick. For those of you just joining us, that last song was Out of Exile by Audioslave. Up next… a personal favorite by Livien, entitled Numb.”

“This is why I never listen to the radio” Liz stated as Max’s voice flooded the store.

“He sounds so raw and edgy. Who’s this song about, anyway” Isabel queried and shot Liz a curious look before returning to her hunt for the perfect gift.

“I’ve become so numb I can’t feel you there…. I’ve become so tired so much more aware…. I’m becoming this all I want to do…. Is be more like me and be less like you…” He sang with so much passion and conviction. To anyone else, it was just a song. Something to play when you’re angry, something to sing at the top of your lungs but to Liz it was so much more.

“His dad” she replied, thinking of the first and only time she ever met Phillip Evans.

“Um… hi, can I help with something?” Liz greeted when she pulled open the door and found a gray haired, middle aged man standing on the other side. She didn’t know his face but there was something about him that seemed familiar. “Wait a second, are you Mr. Evans?” she asked when she finally looked at his eyes and realized they were the exact same shade as her boyfriend’s.

“Aren’t you the observant one” he grinned though it looked almost feral, rather than friendly. “Where is my son, by the way?” he added and looked past Liz to the foyer, as though expecting Max to just magically appear.

“He had a meeting with his label but he should be back soon” Liz answered and stepped aside. “Would you like to come inside and wait for him?” she offered, wearing a polite smile. Returning it, Philip stepped through the doorway and followed Liz into the large, spacious living room. “Can I get you something to drink?”

“Tom Collins” he requested and didn’t notice the small frown that crossed Liz’s lips.

“I’m sorry… I don’t really know how to make any mixed drinks” Liz admitted a moment later. At seventeen, she was watched like a hawk by her manager and publicist who made sure to keep her name and image clean. Drinking at any time was out of the question and when she wasn’t touring or recording, she never really had the inclination to ask Max for a taste of whatever he was having. “Can I get you something else” she tentatively asked.

Since they began dating, Liz had only met a few people in Max’s life. There was his band and then there were his people… publicist, manager… agent. His closest friends were his band mates and while he occasionally hung out with another celebrity, Max was mostly a private person who relished his personal space. He had only mentioned his family a couple times in passing though Liz always got the impression he didn’t want to be asked about them. She respected that and never pushed though now she wondered why it was such a big secret.

Philip seemed nice enough, she thought.

“Anything you can find, straight” Philip amended and offered Liz another one of his grins.

“Sure” she said and hurried off to the kitchen to find something for him to drink. Opening and closing cupboards, she finally found a recently opened bottle of Vodka and poured a liberal amount into a glass tumbler. Some sloshed onto the counter so with her back to the door, she reached for a towel to mop up the spill. “Oh… Mr. Evans” she said in surprise when she turned and found him standing in front of her. “I was just about to take your drink out to you.”

“Observant… thoughtful… very beautiful” he murmured and ran one, ice cold finger down her cheek. “What’s wrong?” he asked when Liz took a step away from him, fear in her eyes like a prey watching her hunter.

“You know what… Max mentioned something about um… this… this thing he had tonight. So maybe you should leave and… and um… come back another time” she suggested and continued to step back each time he took a step closer. “Mr. Evans, I really think you should go now” Liz said in the strongest voice she could muster.

“Well that’s awfully rude, don’t you think?” he asked and reached for the forgotten bottle of Vodka. After drinking the contents of a second glass, he returned his gaze to the frightened teenager pressed up against the counter. “You have nothing to be afraid of. Come on, why don’t we get to know each other a little better” he suggested and held the bottle out towards Liz. “Why don’t you have a sip? Maybe it’ll calm your nerves.”

“Mr. Evans, I would really like for you to leave now” Liz stated and watched his eyes, so similar to his sons, fill with anger.

“Now you listen to me. This is my son’s house and I will not have some cheap little whore try and tell me what to do” he spat and roughly grabbed her arm, forcing Liz to look up at him. “Do you understand me?” he demanded and dug his hand a little deeper into skin. “Now what…”

Liz blinked and a moment later, she opened her eyes to see Philip Evans being forcefully pulled away. She hadn’t heard him walk in but relief overwhelmed her senses at the sight of Max pushing his father out of the house, yelling something that she couldn’t quite grasp.

Moments later he returned and pulled her into his embrace. “I’m so sorry, baby. He’s gone now. I promise, he’s gone” Max whispered and continuously ran his fingers through her ginger locks, trying to soothe her frazzled nerves. “I’m here” he murmured and held her closer when she began to shake in his arms. “I’m here.”

That was the first time Max ever opened up to her. That night he told her all about Philip and the relationship he had with him while growing up. It hadn’t been a happy story but it went a long way in explaining the music Max wrote.

“Oh my god! This is it” Isabel exclaimed, holding up a vintage Led Zeppelin concert t-shirt. “Happy birthday to Alex!”

[To_Kiss_A_Frog]

Hello everyone! As always, thanks for your feedback, it's much appreciated! Ths song used here is Angel's Son by Sevendust.

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Chapter 4 - Angel's Son

“I can hear your fingers sliding against the strings” Max stated from where he sat at the piano, rewriting a part he was unsatisfied with. Frowning, Liz glared at the new tablature Max had given her to sight read then stuck her tongue out at the back of his head. “You know the amazing thing about the glass in front of me? It shows your reflection” he added, unbothered by her sulky attitude.

“You know what your problem is?” Liz questioned and walked forward to stand in Max’s line of sight. “You write this stuff and forget that you’re not the one who’s going to play it. Then you’re disappointed in me because my fingers don’t move as fast as yours” she stated and crossed her arms over her chest, wearing a mutinous expression. “News flash, my hands are a lot smaller.”

“Which means that it’s easier for you to move between chords because your fingers won’t get caught up in the strings” Max corrected and tossed his pencil aside, frustrated with both the music and Liz.

“Maybe we should just take a break” Liz suggested, shooting him a pleading look. “Because frankly, you’re driving me up the wall” she bluntly admitted, ignoring the way he quirked his brow mockingly. “And truthfully, I have no idea how the two of us ended up with so many songs between us when our styles are completely different” she mused and nudged him over so that she could sit beside him on the piano bench.

“It’s called sex, Parker” Max retorted without remorse. “Every time things got crazy between us, we jumped into bed and used our anger in a way that got us both off. Then we sat down and started working all over again until we came up with a song.”

“How’s it coming along, kids?” Brody popped in and asked, saving Liz from any kind of reply. Internally, she was thankful for his interruption and quickly jumped at the opportunity to put some distance between herself and Max. With one sentence things had quickly gotten a little too personal for her liking.

“Great” Liz smiled and went to retrieve her discarded guitar. “But I have to get going. I have a birthday party to help set up” she said to Brody, missing the small frown that temporarily marred Max’s face.

“Can you give us a second?” Max said though it was obvious to both Liz and Brody that it wasn’t a request. Nodding, Brody excused himself and swiftly left the pair alone again. “This is our third meeting and we haven’t even gotten through one song. Plus I haven’t seen any lyrics yet” he stated, shooting her an expectant glance. “Look Parker, you said you didn’t want to talk about all that stuff that happened with us before so I’ve kept quiet but I won’t for long if it’s the reason you’re lagging on this.”

“I’m not lagging” she quickly defended. “But did you ever stop and consider how hard this is for me? Did it ever occur to you that it isn’t the easiest thing in the world to lock myself up in a room with you and bare my soul to your ears?” she demanded, her voice rising with each word.

“Probably about as easy as it for me to lock myself up in a room with you and keep everything I want to do and say in check” Max retorted and stepped forward until they were only a few inches apart. “Probably about as easy as it is to pour myself into your songs. To know that no matter how much of myself I put into them, I’ll still never have a piece of you to hold onto.”

“Don’t do this” Liz begged and took a single step away. “It isn’t fair.”

Max opened his mouth to argue but one look at Liz’s face had him biting back the words. “You should go” he murmured instead. “Alex and the others are probably waiting for you” he said, surprising Liz that he had remembered whose birthday it was. “I’ll fix the tabs… make them small hand friendly” he offered and turned back to the piano when she tried to say something in reply.

Blinking back tears that she had been holding in for too long, Liz blindly reached behind her and grabbed the guitar case. Again, she opened her mouth to say something, anything but the words refused to fall. “Bye” she managed and faintly heard his answering reply as she walked out the studio door.


~&~&~&~&~&


“So how’s work coming along with your pill popping, booze guzzling ex boyfriend?” Tess asked as she dropped down into the chair beside Liz’s.

The sound of her condescending voice caused more than a dozen other insults flooded Liz’s mind. Countless times during and after her relationship with Max. She disputed most, other times she just kept quiet, knowing it wouldn’t make much of a difference in Tess’ mind.

“You know… I’m sure you’re an okay person inside” Liz stated as Tess turned towards her, wearing an innocent smile. “But no one will ever notice that if you don’t take your bitch mask off every once in a while” she informed and enjoyed the scowl that transformed Tess’ face. “And things are fine by the way. Thanks for asking” she winked and rose her chair. “Buh Bye now.”

“Ooh, I know that look” Alex exclaimed when Liz strolled up to join their conversation. “Kyle, your girlfriend is being a hag again” he stated, bluntly.

“Damn, Liz could try not to piss her off so much” Kyle requested after glancing over in his girlfriend’s direction. “She takes that shit out on me when we’re home.”

“Then tell her to keep her big, fat nose out of my business” Liz stated, calling attention to the fact that she was truly angry and not just annoyed. “I’m sick of her running commentary. One more time and that’s it… she’s out. At least for me. I don’t want her managing my career if she’s going to give me attitude at every turn.” With stunned expressions on all their faces, Liz walked away, leaving her friends to mull over her words and wonder what caused them.

Running on instinct, Liz fled the apartment building and jumped into her car. Maneuvering in and out of traffic, there was no stopping to wonder whether or not she was making the right choice. In the end, she realized she didn’t have a choice… not anymore, not where he was concerned.

Time seemed to stand still when she screeched to a stop in front of Antarian Records.

“It’s now or never” she said to herself and quickly got out of the car. If there was even still a hint of the old Max in this new version, Liz knew he’d still be locked up in the studio, playing around with his tabs until it was perfect enough to fit his standards. That thought alone got her into the building and up to the eleventh floor.

“You were fighting everyday…. So hard to hide the pain…. I know you never said goodbye…. I had so much left to say….” The amps echoed out the sound of his electric guitar, almost drowning out his voice. It was a song Liz had never heard before but listening closely enough, she realized why.

“One last song…. Given to an Angel’s Son…. As soon as you were gone…. As soon as you were gone….”

“Sounds painful” Liz called out and stepped further into the studio.

“Yeah, well… that’s what ninety mandatory therapy hours in rehab will do to you” Max replied and pulled the chord from his guitar to the amp. “What are you doing back here? I thought you had a birthday party to attend.”

“I did… I do but… you were right” Liz confessed, biting her lip in uncertainty. She could pick her words carefully or she could be honest. In the end, she decided that sugarcoating wouldn’t do either of them any good. “I hated you” she stated, despite how much it hurt to admit. “As much as I loved you, I hated the person you became… the person you hid from me. I’m afraid of talking about it now because I’m scared to stop hating you.”

“Why?” Max asked, pushing past the pain he felt at her words.

“Because then I’ll be back in the same place I was in four years ago, the first time I tried to walk away” Liz answered and closed her eyes to ward off the tears threatening to fall. “I couldn’t do it then and if… if he hadn’t… died, I don’t think I would have been able to stay away from you a year later either. And I’m sorry if that hurts you but it’s the truth.”

Nodding, Max turned his back to Liz and began toying with the switches on his amp. “So I’ll ask again, what are you doing here?”

“Because I’m angry at you… because I want you to answer something for me” Liz replied with forced strength. “Just… just tell me why. Why couldn’t you have done it for me? Why couldn’t… couldn’t you have done it for me?” she cried, no longer concerned with whether or not he saw and heard her tears.

“If you don’t already know the answer to that question then there’s nothing I can say to make you think any differently” Max said in a voice just above a whisper.

“No” Liz demanded and walked forward until she could reach out and tug on his arm. “Don’t you dare take the easy way out. Don’t feed me some bullshit about not understanding.” With fire in her brown orbs, she stared him down, each unwilling to look away first. “Tell me why, Max. Why couldn’t you do it for me?” she asked once last time, knowing in her heart that she would walk away if he didn’t answer.

“How can you not get it?” Max asked though it was obvious he didn’t expect her to answer. On impulse, he raised his hands to cup her cheeks, wiping away her tears with the pads of his thumbs. “I did do it for you.”


~&~&~&~&~&


“What happened?” Liz immediately pounced, the moment Lonnie stepped into the room. For hours, she remained unable to sleep, unwilling to close her eyes for even a moment. She couldn’t and wouldn’t rest until he was found. If it meant going out onto the streets and looking for him herself, she would do it.

“Read for yourself” Lonnie replied and handed Liz a formal statement issued to the press. “His publicist faxed it over a few minutes ago. It should hit the papers by tomorrow afternoon” she explained as Liz’s hungry eyes roved over the copy. Each word was like a dagger to her heart but deeper than that, she knew it was for the best. He needed this and a part of her realized that she needed it too.

“So he’s giving it all up” Liz said and swiped a hand across her cheek to brush away the tears. “Walking away from Livien and going into rehab.”

“You know how close they were, Liz. How well would you have taken it if it had been Alex or Kyle or Jesse?” Lonnie questioned and placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. “I hate that he had to lose someone but if it was the catalyst that finally convinced him to go into rehab, that at least one good thing came of all this” she said but her words offered no comfort to Liz’s battered heart. She was still trying to process everything, feeling every emotion from anger to sadness.

Her heart broke for Max, for what he was struggling with and for the loss of his best friend. She was angry that Tess knew about all it and kept it a secret… angry at her band mates for trying to talk her out of coming back. She was angry that no one seemed to understand exactly what she was going through and so sad inside because she knew it was really over. It was the deal she made. It was the price she was going to have to pay in order to make sure he got his life together.

Liz knew it would hurt but she had no idea it would hurt so much that it literally felt as though her heart was breaking in two.

“So what now?” she asked, holding her head up high despite the swirling emotions still plaguing her.

“Now you join the guys in Seattle and finish up the last leg of your tour” Lonnie answered with an apology in her voice. “Now you let go, Liz.”

Nodding, she replied “Right… now I let go.”


~&~&~&~&~&


“What are you talking about” Liz questioned but couldn’t bring herself to take a much needed step away. “I read the papers… read your statements. You did it because of…”

“Because of you” Max interrupted and shook his head when her confused expression continued to mar her features. “But I couldn’t say that. Everything about you was something I wanted to lock away and keep to myself. You know that. You always knew that.”

Nodding in agreement, Liz remembered how different Max was from other celebrities. He relished his space and hated having his privacy invaded. The only thing he was ever willing to comment on to the press was his music. Everything having to do with their relationship was always kept a closely guarded secret. It wasn’t shame or embarrassment over her age, four years younger than his, it was his desire to keep her to himself because she mattered too much to have their relationship exploited.

Liz had never doubted his reasoning either. She had no need to when he showed her every day how important she was, how much he loved her.

“That night you came to me is still fuzzy around the edges. I couldn’t honestly repeat every word you gave me but one thing I’ll never forget was the way you cried in my arms” Max murmured and gently pushed the hair away from her face. It was an old gesture that he seemed to do without thinking. “You were in so much pain because of me and everything else I felt… all the anger and pain I felt was completely overshadows by the haunted look in your eyes.”

“I hated how much you started to scare me” Liz admitted and looked down at her shoes, knowing her words would only hurt him a little more. “I knew… I knew you would never hurt me… at least not physically but it was too hard to see the way you hurt yourself. I was angry that you didn’t love me enough to fix it.”

“I was stupid” Max stated with complete certainty. “But it was never a question of loving you.”

“Max, I can’t go back there” Liz immediately said, shaking her head as she finally took a step back.

“Because you’re still scared of me?” he asked and allowed her the space she needed without invading it again.

“Because I still have so much to work out in my head” Liz corrected and couldn’t resist taking his hand in hers. “Can’t we just work together for now? Do what we do best and work through everything as we go along. Can you just… just be my producer… my co-writer?”

This time Max was the one who looked away at her request. Liz briefly wondered if there would ever be a time when they didn’t hurt each other. “I guess I don’t have much of a choice, do I” Max replied and gently slipped his hand from within hers. Liz fought the urge to reach out and grab it again as she saw him close up before her eyes.

“I’ll have lyrics” Liz offered. “The next time, I… I’ll bring lyrics.”

It was a small step but both understood it was a peace offering. Bringing in her words for him to read and sing was giving him a small opening back into her heart. The music came from her heart and it would be the piece of herself she gave him to hold onto. It wasn’t much but it was the best she could do just then.

“And maybe some time you could hear what I’ve written since Livien” Max replied in his own uncertain voice.

“I’d like that” Liz jumped and gave him a small smile. “I should go… I kind of ditched the party to come back here. You know how much I love cake” she joked and was awarded a small grin from Max. “So I’ll see you… okay?”

“Okay” he replied and watched her slowly back out of the room.

“Okay” Liz repeated and stepped out of the studio, feeling as though a small weight had just been lifted from her shoulders.

[To_Kiss_A_Frog]

Thanks to:

BehrObsession
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pLANETv33n3ss
Emz80m
Shadowlynxbehr

Chapter 5 - Remember When

“Kyle, hi” Liz greeted when she opened her hotel room door and found him standing on the other end. “Come in” she invited, perplexed by his sudden arrival. The way he and Tess had been all over one in another in the limo ride, she figured neither would resurface until late the next morning. “What’s up?” she asked while watching him pace back and forth, trying to work out the words he wanted to say.

“Since Al’s party, I’ve been asking Tess what the deal between the two of you is” Kyle finally answered and pinned Liz with a serious expression. “I know you’re hiding something, both of you are but what I can’t figure out is what it is. Now I want you to tell me what the mysterious secret is about.” The look he wore was one Liz rarely, if ever saw. Kyle had always been the joking, go with the flow kind of guy who hated confrontations and awkward situations. Now standing before her, he looked more serious than she had seen him in years.

“It isn’t really my place” Liz said, apologetically. “Tess has to be the one to tell you.”

“Well Tess won’t tell me so now I’m asking you to” Kyle argued and gave Liz a pleading stare. “We’ve known each other for seven years now, Lizzie. We’ve been to every state, every major venue and in every crappy bus together. We’re friends… so be a friend to me now. Tell me the truth.”

Torn, Liz turned away from his curious eyes and flipped the switch on stereo system. She couldn’t take the silence and needed some form of a distraction in order to get her words out. Otherwise she would remain locked in the memories he was asking her to dredge up.

“Do you remember the night I found out Sean had overdosed?” she began, finally meeting Kyle’s gaze. He nodded once to show he remembered and waited for her to continue the story. “I was so angry when you all tried to talk me out of leaving the tour to see Max. I thought you were all… selfish and mean and… and my emotions were running so high when I left that I ended up making a deal I regretted immediately after.”

“Deal with who?” Kyle questioned though Liz could see the hurt on his face from her admission. When she had returned to Seattle to finish up the tour, they had all been angry and accused her of always putting Max ahead of the band. None had liked him, all believing that he was too old for Liz and was having too big an influence over her career.

Liz remembered how she yelled back at them though if asked, she wouldn’t be able to recall her words. It had all been said in anger and grief. That night she learned she lost a good friend and in the process, his death dredged up a lot of other bad memories she always worked so hard to bury away. They hadn’t understood that then, they couldn’t have because the only person who knew all the details had been Max. Even after all those years, they still didn’t know parts of the story.

“With Tess” she answered and hurried on while she could still get it all out. “She knew things… about Max. Things that could make his life a living hell if anyone else found out” Liz finally confessed. “When we began dating and Tess found out, she began digging into his past, looking for any and everything she could use in case it fizzled. She wanted to make sure he wouldn’t ruin my career” she said, rolling her eyes heavenward. Even now, it sounded flimsy to her own ears.

Tess had assumed Max had never mentioned their very brief past with one another. It was the start of his career and Tess had jumped at the chance to manage him. Max was new to the game and took a meeting with Tess to see what she had to offer.

When she immediately rubbed him the wrong way with her stereotypes about the trailer park Michael and Rath had grown up in, Max signed with someone else instead.

Later, as Livien got more attention, Tess was bitter that she had been dismissed by them.

“I was so screwed up then, Kyle. I didn’t know what I wanted anymore or… what to do anymore so Tess threatened to release all that stuff about Max if I tried to leave the band” Liz admitted, feeling a small sense of guilt that she had even considered walking away from them all. “She gave me thirty six hours to get to Max and to do whatever I had to do. Afterwards, I was supposed to return to the tour and forget he ever existed.”

Liz could feel her throat closing up, remembering how torn she had been. In the end, it had been a battle of wills as she struggled to fulfill her end, all the while regretting and wondering.

“She black mailed you?” Kyle questioned in disbelief. “Are you saying she threatened to fuck him up publicly if you didn’t do what she wanted?” he demanded in a way that had Liz feeling even sorrier for the answer she had to give him.

“That’s what I’m saying” Liz agreed and saw the anger and hurt Kyle couldn’t hide. “I hated her for so long and I hated that she had that kind of power over me but… but looking back on it now, what she did wasn’t entirely terrible” she said, thoroughly shocking her friend.

“How could you say it wasn’t terrible?” Kyle demanded in a voice roughened by his barely contained anger. “She fucking black mailed you, Liz. She took things, personal things and used them against you” he all but yelled. “How could you keep this from me?” It was a question Liz had anticipated but even so, she was certain she had the answer he wanted.

“Look, at the time I would have walked away. I would have left Echo and I would have stayed with Max” Liz admitted, saying the words she had never spoken aloud to anyone else. “It probably would have been the biggest mistake I could have made then but I was willing to do it anyway. Tess held me back from that and as much as I wanted to hate her for it, she kept me in check when my emotions were doing all the thinking.”

“That still doesn’t make it better, Liz” he said, unable to hold back the disappointment he so obviously felt.

“Maybe not” she acknowledged. “But nothing about that situation was easy, Kyle. I was a twenty year old who only knew that the person I loved more than anything in the world was hurting. I didn’t have the common sense or experience to handle it so she stepped in. She did it wrong and played with my head but in the end, she just did what she had to do as manager. She looked out for me, no matter how much I wanted to believe she was an evil hag.”

A moment passed while he absorbed everything, leaving Liz to contemplate on whether or not he would understand. “But you still haven’t answered my question” Kyle reminded though he seemed visibly calmer. “Why didn’t you say anything to the band… why didn’t you say anything to me? You kept this piece of information to yourself even after I started dating Tess. Why?” he asked, still unable to see Liz’s reasoning for the choice she made.

“When I returned for the last leg of the tour, my body was there but my heart wasn’t. It was in New Mexico with Max at his Drug Rehabilitation Center. It was in LA with Maria who was mourning her brother’s death. It was in the past” Liz said because it was the only way she could explain her decision. “So when the haze finally lifted from my mind and I slowly started to become the person I once was, I couldn’t take a step backwards by acknowledging what happened with Tess. Call me selfish, I’d deserve it but I just couldn’t do it.”

Kyle remained quiet, as though processing her words. Liz knew it wasn’t easy for him to suddenly find out his girlfriend of two years had kept some pretty big secrets from him.

“Is there anything else?” he finally asked in a quiet tone. Liz wanted to reach out to him but wasn’t sure it would be wanted just then. Instead she shook her head and gave him almost inaudible, no. “Right… well I’m gonna get going. Night, Liz.”

“Kyle… I know this doesn’t make things better but I am sorry” Liz apologized and watched him nod once before strolling back out the room.

Alone again, she walked over to the window and looked out at the Hollywood skyline. She had been loathsome to return to her hometown, even for only a day to do the Jimmy Kimmel Show but she hadn’t had a choice in the matter. Lonnie booked it and there was no backing out, no matter how much she wanted to.

It had been seven years. Seven long years since she got signed with Four Square Records and left behind a lifetime of heartache to sing her pain away on a cross country tour. She never looked back and only ever spoke once about it… the night she met Max’s father.

“Would you tell me about it?” Liz asked as she rested her cheek against Max’s chest. It wasn’t late and the sun was just beginning to go down as the two laid together on his bed, warmed by the thick comforter surrounding them. Methodically, he ran his hands through her hair as she listened to the steady beat of his heart, comforted by its even sound.

“Not much to tell” Max replied in the same quiet voice she used. “I grew up with Philip and Diane Evans, two parents who had the highest expectations for me because they were too screwed up to be anything for themselves. We lived in a big house, they had decent jobs… we went to church together on Sundays but it was just this façade… pretending so that we seemed better than all the other families. Then when the lights went out and doors were closed, he was an abusive drunk and she was a manipulative whore who got off on being pushed around by him.”

It was said so casually that Liz realized he had come to terms with it long before. “Did he ever… I mean, did he push… you… around?” she tentatively asked, comforted when he didn’t stiffen or stop his ministrations.

“When I was a kid” Max replied evenly. “But he stopped when I became stronger then he was.”

At a loss, Liz searched for something to say… something to make him feel even an ounce better. When she found nothing, she opted for truthful instead. “My mom slapped me once” she admitted, all the while knowing it wasn’t the same thing. “It was right after my brother… after he… um… it was right after. I said something about her needing to accept he was gone and not coming back and she slapped me across the cheek.”

“Do you ever think of going back there to see her?” Max queried and rolled them over so that they laid on their sides, facing one another. Gently, he pushed the hair away from her face and placed a soft kiss against her lips. Of their own volition, Liz’s eye lashes fluttered closed as she relished the feeling for just a moment before opening them again and answering his question.

“Sometimes… but mostly just around his anniversary” she replied, thinking back to the day she left. “It just became so hard to be around her. I wanted to help her, so much but she wouldn’t let me. She couldn’t acknowledge that anything was wrong so she just kept going through the motions, existing instead of living. I just couldn’t do it anymore. I couldn’t watch her do it anymore.”

Reality had been a hard pill to swallow for Liz who finally had to make a choice. Pretending and wishing for something that would never come true became more painful than the truth was. So when the opportunity came to sing professionally, she jumped at the chance and in the process, left behind the only family she had left in order to survive.

For over an hour afterward the two talked, sharing little tidbits of their past with one another. Liz learned how Philip once forbid Max from seeing Rath and Michael because of where they lived. She learned how Diane had affairs with other men but always came back to Philip despite his violent attitude towards her. Then when he had said all he could, Max remained quiet and listened to Liz talk about what it was like growing up in Hollywood.

The sun went down and the moon lit up the sky by the time their words had faded away. Left in silence, Liz thought back on all she learned, realizing how much of himself Max put into his songs. They were familiar to her now because she finally knew the meaning behind them. Anger… sadness… disappointment… it was all he had known so it was all he wrote.

“Liz…” Max said, bringing her out of her musings. He waited until she had opened her eyes, meeting his expressive hazel ones. “I love you” Max told her, uttering the words for the first time.

With the memories still fresh in her mind, Liz reached for her cell phone and quickly dialed a number. “Lonnie, I need you to do me a big favor. I need you to find a home phone number for me… Max Evans.”


~&~&~&~&~&


As the Taxi slowed to a stop at the cemetery gates, Liz felt her nervousness spike. “Would you wait here… I’ll only be a few minutes” she requested, paying the driver for the ride. Nodding, the elderly man nodded and agreed to stay behind while she went inside.

With slow, tentative steps, Liz walked down the path that would lead her to her destination. A waning moon provided the only source of light though Liz could have found the spot with her eyes closed. So many times before, she had taken those same steps to pay him a visit and even now, years later, she still easily remembered the way.

The fresh flowers over the moist earth gave away the fact that someone had been there recently. Liz suspected it had been Danielle, his old girlfriend since Nancy Parker made it a rule to never visit the grave. In her mind she believed it was untrue as long as she didn’t acknowledge it.

An angel flanked each side of the headstone and with unsteady hands, she traced the words etched into the smooth, cool stone.

<center>Joshua Adam Parker
1981-1998
Beloved Son & Brother </center>

“Hey Josh… it’s been a long time. I’m sorry I didn’t come sooner… I was touring and working and… and I’m a coward. I couldn’t come back here, anymore. It all changed and mom was this wreck and I just couldn’t deal with it. I felt like I was the parent and she was my child. I felt so out of control and I had to get out” Liz rambled before stopping to take a breath.

Slowly, she lowered herself to the ground and sat before the large stone. In a sign of pure nervousness, she wrung her hands together before reaching for a blade of grass to toy with. Much as she had when he was alive, she opened her mouth and bared her soul to a grave.

“I won a Grammy… and a couple other awards but my favorite is my MTV movie award for best song. Um… what else? I’ve been doing the Children’s Hospital Benefit for six years now, I’m working on a new song for Echo to perform… Echo is the name of my band. Oh and before I forget, I’m going solo now. The record label has me paired up with my ex-boyfriend which is strange and slightly therapeutic at the same time. But we’re good together… musically, I mean. I also told him about you. He knows what a dork you were and how I used to be able to outrun you even though you’re two years older than me.”

As she sat there filling him on the happenings of her life, a single tear slipped down her cheek. Stubbornly, Liz refused to succumb to the sadness quickly overtaking her and rushed on with her words.

“I’m sorry, Josh. I’m so sorry I didn’t come sooner but I won’t do it again, okay. I promise you that I’ll come back to see you again and maybe I’ll even sing a song for you. Maybe I’ll sing that stupid Barney song because I know how much it pisses you off” she said while her tears began to fall faster than she could wipe them away. “I love you Josh and… I’ll see you soon… just… just don’t think I don’t love you… just please don’t think that.”

Unable to take any more, Liz pushed herself off the ground and quickly hurried away from her past. She didn’t stop running until she reached the gates again and paused to catch her breath.

Leaning against the entrance wall, she reached into her pocket to pull out the small slip of paper with the number Lonnie had retrieved. Before she could talk herself out of it, Liz dialed the number and listened to the phone ring three times before a voice on the other end answered.

“Max… it’s me. Can we talk?”

[To_Kiss_A_Frog]

Thanks begonia 9508 and BehrObsession for your feedback


Chapter 6 - Tear me in Two

“Maria, slow down” Liz intervened. “Now tell me what happened. What didn’t I show up for?” she asked, only to be met with loud sobbing. “Maria! Maria, talk to me” she yelled into the phone as another voice spoke. “Michael, what’s going on? What’s happening?” she demanded as dread welled up in the pit of her stomach.

“You mean you don’t know?” he asked in surprise, thoroughly confusing Liz more.

“Know what? Michael, what’s wrong? Is everyone okay… is Max… god, is Max is okay?” Liz asked in rapid succession, praying that the man she loved hadn’t been hurt.

“It’s not Max” Michael rushed to assure. “It’s Sean… he… god, Max was all messed up about the break up so Sean took him out to some party. He got all loaded up on Vodka and blow… Max dropped some acid and he started freaking out, hallucinating and shit so someone got him out, I don’t even remember who. Sean kept partying… he took heroine and… and he OD’d. He’s dead, Liz.”

The words hit her like a blow to the stomach as Liz leaned forward and began heaving, desperately trying to drag in large gulps of air. She felt the phone slip from her fingers and hit the tiled floor, echoing throughout the dressing room. “No… no” she muttered over and over again as she dropped to her knees and cried for her friend.

“NO!” Liz woke up screaming and clawed at the blanket, trying to break free from its confines. Two hands reached out and pulled her hands away from her face, holding her steady as she struggled to catch her breath. “Shh…” he murmured seconds before she threw herself against him, allowing his warmth to protect her if only for a few minutes. “Shh… it’s okay… I’m here” he continued to murmur as her breath slowly began to even out. “It’s okay.”

After leaving the cemetery, Liz was unable to calm down. Visiting her brother’s grave brought back so many memories of him and of Sean, all of which refused to fade back into the darkness where she needed them to remain. Her emotions were running high and she fell back into an old habit, one that had always brought her comfort… she ran to Max.

The idea of packing up her stuff and talking to Tess escaped her as Liz instructed the cab driver to take her straight to LAX. There she managed to get a ticket at the last minute and caught a flight into JFK where Max was nervously waiting.

There was confusion in his eyes but he refrained from asking anything. Liz knew that while he understood what upset her, he had no idea why she chose him as the person to turn to.

It wasn’t until they arrived at his apartment that Liz finally broke down and cried against his shoulder. Everything about her visit with Joshua to memories of Sean to the reoccurring nightmares she had begun having. All her worst moments relived at night while she remained trapped inside them, unable to wake until all the events had played themselves out.

Then when she cried herself to sleep, Max lifted her up into his arms and carried her to his bed. After tucking her in beneath the comforter, he sat himself on a chair in the corner of the room and watched Liz sleep until she began screaming and fighting her way back to consciousness. The fear in her voice had him sitting on the bed, scooping her up into his arms as her cries slowly began to subside.

“I’m sorry” Liz whispered from where her head rested against his tear soaked chest. “I know I’m not being fair, I just…” she trailed off, unsure of what she was trying to say. “You’re the only one, you know?” she whispered and choked back another sob when she felt him nod. Tightly, she wrapped her arms around his waist, scared that if she loosened her grip, he would disappear. “Now I know why I never wanted to go back there before” she admitted.

“I’m sorry, baby. I know how hard it must have been” Max quietly murmured, gently running his fingers through her hair.

“I know you do” Liz said and tried to get as close as she could to his body so that even a breath of air couldn’t have passed between them. “Do we ever get past it, Max? Will there ever be a day when we wake up, open our eyes and accept everything that happened? Accept the fact that they’re never walking back into our lives no matter how much we wish they would.” It had been more than seven years since her brother’s death yet there were still days when Liz forgot he wasn’t a phone call away. Each time she remembered again, it got harder and harder to pretend she was alright.

“I wish I had an answer for you” Max replied after several silent moments. “But I don’t think the guilty are ever meant to forget their sins.”

“Where is he?” Liz demanded as she sped down the highway in the car she retrieved from Max’s garage. After arriving in New York, she immediately went to his house on Long Island only to find a disaster area instead. Broken glass littered the floor, the same song continued to play on repeat in the stereo and the entire house smelled strongly of alcohol.

Running on adrenaline, Liz dug around in a drawer until she found the keys to his garage and wasted no time starting up the fastest car he had.

“Look, I don’t think this is a good idea. You should just let…”

“Damn it, Rath!” Liz swore as her concerns and frustrations got the better of her. “I don’t give a fuck what you think I should do. If you want to be a dick about it then fine, but I will find him whether you think I should or not. Now are you going to help me or am I on my own?” she asked, all the while growing more worried with each passing mile.

“He’s at the bridge” Rath sighed and was unable to get another word out before Liz snapped the phone shut and gunned the engine.

“Max, you didn’t kill him” Liz immediately argued and lifted her head from his chest so that she could look into his eyes. “You didn’t make him take all those drugs and you aren’t the one that let him die. You have to know that.”

“Rath went to the party after the police called Maria” Max said in a voice roughened with liquor and grief. Liz was nervous about the way he sat atop one of the girders though she knew he wouldn’t move down to the ground, even if she asked. “They remembered Sean… he passed out on some table after he took his first hit of smack. They thought he would wake up but when he didn’t, they got scared. They thought if they called an ambulance, the cops would show up and they’d all be busted.”

There was so much anguish in his voice, so much loathing in his eyes but as much as it scared Liz, it was better than the zombie she had found an hour before.

“So two of them grabbed his arms and legs… they carried him out into the alley behind the building. No one called 911, no one stayed behind to see if he was okay, they just… left him there. It’s like he stopped existing the moment they turned their backs and walked back inside. So an hour passes and these two girls duck into the alley to smoke a cigarette and find him lying there. He was already cold… with grime on his face from the dirty pavement.”

Max paused only to take a drink from the half filled bottle dangling between his fingers. It wasn’t one of the expensive liquors from his house but a cheap bottle of Southern Comfort that didn’t even burn his throat on the way down. Liz wondered how many of those he had finished since getting word of Sean’s death but didn’t dare ask. She knew that by now, he was straddling a fine line between drunk and complete awareness though she wasn’t sure how long he would stay there before falling in one direction.

Liz didn’t know which would be worse.

“The really fucked up part is that he had only been dead for forty minutes when they found him. He could have made it, he could have fucking made if those assholes had just called an ambulance. He didn’t have to die.” When his voice cracked on the last word, Liz looked up and found him chucking the bottle out into the River. “It isn’t fair, Parker. It should’ve been me.”

“After all this time, how can you still feel responsible for what happened?” Liz questioned in disbelief. “The only thing you’re guilty of is guilt. Sean made a choice and those people at the party made another one but you… you had nothing to do with it, Max” she said, forcing him to meet her gaze so that he could see the honesty she held in each word.

“As much as I understand that, no matter how much time passes there will always be a small part of me that feels like I could have made things different” Max admitted while slowly, he took her hand in his and placed it against his chest, resting directly over his heart. “It’s what my mind tells me but here… here I accept what happened. Here I forgive myself for whatever part I played but it’s also here, that I’ll never forget.”

Liz felt more tears spring to her eyes when she realized in that single moment just how much Max had changed. He wasn’t the man on the bridge and he wasn’t the man she first met. He was someone who had been touched by death and heartache, so much more than anyone deserved to have in their life. Too many people had walked out on him, given up on him or had been taken away for whatever reason. Liz understood she became one of those people but despite it all, here he stood, amazing and filled with more wisdom than she had given him credit for.

The realization left her at a loss over what to say. Frantically, she searched her mind for the words to tell him how proud she was of him for all that he had acknowledged and changed. She wanted to but none of the words seemed to fit. “I can’t believe it’s already morning here” Liz finally commented when she found nothing else to say. A faint light had begun to creep into the room, alerting Liz to the fact that she only had a couple hours left before Tess awoke in California and realized she was gone. “Were you able to get any sleep at all?” she asked.

The serious mood of the room was slowly starting to shift but still, Liz remained perched in Max’s lap, studying him like she used to when they first began dating.

He once asked why she did that so often and Liz would never forget his expression when she gave him an answer. “I’m memorizing you. I want to be able to close my eyes and remember every detail so that you can keep my company when we’re on separate tours.” Loving him had been so easy for her to do. Now, it scared Liz to acknowledge how much she still felt towards him.

“I closed my eyes long enough” Max replied while trying to avoid having to say that he had been too worried about her to find his own sleep. “Tell you what. Why don’t we go into the kitchen and…” he trailed off as the intercom buzzed loudly. A moment of realization flashed over his features while only confusion marred Liz’s. “I’ll be right back” he said and regretfully had to release her from the warmth of his embrace.

Liz, who seemed perplexed that someone was showing up so early in the morning, searched the floor for her purse. She wanted to check her messages and hopefully try to negotiate some way of postponing her show appearance.

When Liz realized she had probably left it out in the living room, she silently debated with herself whether or not to go out there. As she contemplated whether or not it was important to get to her cell phone then and there, she heard the door open. Immediately following were the sounds of childish laughter.

A gnawing sense of fear made a home in Liz’s stomach as she slowly walked towards the bedroom door. She had no idea who was out there but the sight of Max smiling at a little brunette boy had her gasping quietly. And there beside him stood a beautiful woman who ran her hand through the boy’s hair with obvious affection. “Max?” Liz said before she could stop herself.

All three turned towards the doorway, one surprised, one curious and the last silently pleading with her to understand.

[To_Kiss_A_Frog]

Thanks everyone for your interest and feedback!

Mawrter4
DMartinez
begonia9508
BehrObsession
trulov

Chapter 7 - In the End

“Liz… it’s really good to see you again. How are you?” the woman asked with a pleased smile adorning her face. At a loss, Liz turned to Max for some sort of clue as to who the woman was and what she was doing at his apartment with a little boy. “You don’t remember me, do you?” she asked, having witnessed the silent exchanged between the two former lovers.

“Um… no, actually” Liz admitted and was surprised when the woman laughed lightly in response. The action left her even more confused than before.

“It’s Darcy… Darcy Reynolds” she stated, causing Liz to snap her mouth shut as she tried to place where she had heard that name before. It took a moment but when it hit, Liz was assaulted with an image of a much younger woman who had bleached blonde hair, blue eyes and an apron around her waist.

“Oh my god!” Liz gasped in realization. Instantly, she returned her gaze to the woman who looked so different, so much more grown up. “Darcy, how have… have you been?” she questioned with audible tentativeness. Again she looked to Max who was now lifting the small boy in his arms. Another wave of confusion washed over her as she wondered whether or not she had originally jumped to the right conclusion.

“I’m okay” Darcy replied, smiling kindly. “This is my son, Tyler. Sweetie, meet Max’s friend, Liz” she coached though the little boy simply buried his face in Max’s shoulder with obvious shyness. “Max… I have to get going but thank you for doing this today. I’ll be back in a few hours. It was great seeing you again, Liz” she added and offered one last parting smile before hurrying out through the opened door.

“Tyler, why don’t you go into the guest bedroom and watch cartoons for a little while?” he suggested and lowered the boy to the floor.

Nodding, Tyler ran off into what Liz presumed was the guestroom. The action only solidified the fact that the boy and his mother had obviously been to the apartment before. “So… you and Darcy?” she asked, all the while trying to push down the nagging feeling of jealousy that had cemented itself in her heart. After all, they had been apart for just over three years. Liz hadn’t expected him to just pine away, all the while never dating anyone. She also acknowledged that someone as attractive as Max was bound to have women lining up to go out with him.

“You couldn’t be more wrong if you tried” Max surprised Liz by saying. She noticed the small smile he was trying to hide and felt a tinge of annoyance that he had picked up on her feelings. “Come on. I need coffee and you probably need to eat something” he proposed with the slightest hint of concern in his voice. Liz couldn’t help but agree and followed him through the living room into the kitchen.

She watched as he scooped a healthy dose of coffee beans in the percolator before reaching for a pan to place down on a stove burner. Silently, he reached into the refrigerator and returned with several eggs, a package of bacon and a loaf of bread. “Do you still eat yours cooked with salt and pepper?” he asked, startling Liz out of her observations with the sudden sound of his voice.

“It is the only way to eat them” Liz replied as though the answer should have been obvious. The grin Max shot her had Liz smiling back as she leaned back against his nook. “So if I’m wrong… tell me what’s right?” she requested when her curiosity became too much to continue holding in.

“Darcy found out she was pregnant two months before he died” Max stated after a long, contemplative pause. “Sean kept the whole thing quiet because he didn’t want the media after her at work. I was the only one he told… even Maria didn’t know” he quietly added. “I’m sure you remember that the two of them weren’t on the best of terms. Maria always blamed Darcy for getting him into drugs in the first place so even after the funeral she wouldn’t say anything. Hell it never even rang in my mind until I was half way through rehab.”

Liz could easily recall how far gone Max was by the time they had broken up. Once she learned the truth about his habits, he worked less and less to hide them from her until it was all out in the open. Max couldn’t seem to understand how much it hurt her to see him slowly killing himself with all the cocaine and pills… couldn’t see how much he changed before her eyes.

“So when I got out, I looked her up. I figured that Sean would have wanted someone to look out for her so that’s what I did” Max continued and went about cracking eggs in the skillet. The scent of sizzling bacon assaulted Liz’s sense and automatically, she gathered several slices of bread to place in the toaster. Without thinking, she pulled open his refrigerator door, searching for a stick of butter and a jar of jam. Liz didn’t notice the expression adorning Max face, one of longing and sadness.

“Then what happened?” Liz prompted when she realized Max had grown quiet.

“Well… at the time, she was trying really hard to stay clean. She didn’t want anything to happen to Tyler and the fact that Sean died from an overdose played a big part in her desire to kick the habit” Max replied as he continued working on their breakfast. “I understood what she was going through so I tried to be as supportive as I could. Then after Tyler was born, she asked me to be his godfather and eventually, I convinced her to get in touch with Maria. I figured that if nothing else, she deserved to know her nephew.”

Nodding, Liz received the platter of food Max handed her. “But the two of you… you never… you know what, it’s none of my business. Forget I asked” she dismissed and quickly tried to change the subject towards a safer topic. “So how’d you get into producing?”

“Liz…” Max interrupted when she began to shut down. “Let’s just be honest with each other, okay. I’ve hated keeping secrets then and when I got out of rehab, I promised myself I’d never lie to you again if you ever let me back into your life” he stated, daring her to see the truth in his eyes. “You know that I wasn’t a virgin before you and I’m telling you now that I wasn’t a monk after you. I was with other women but the truth of the matter is that they weren’t relationships. I haven’t loved anyone else… I haven’t even really dated anyone else, but I have slept with other people.”

Liz wasn’t prepared for how much the truth actually hurt. She wanted to be angry and lash out at him but held herself back because she would have been a hypocrite. The two were broken up for three years and in that time, she had also gone out with random guys and had even slept with a few. But like Max, she hadn’t loved any of them, mostly because a big part of her heart would always be somewhere else. It was always with him.

When she first began the tour, Liz started seeing one of the guys on the road crew. He had seemed sweet and he was convenient. Yet even then, when she and Max were merely two musicians playing in the same venues, she couldn’t get past her attraction towards him. The idea that he would ever look to her as more than just a girl with a pretty voice seemed like a far fetched dream. There were thousands of women who would have sold their soul for a night with him and Liz wasn’t naïve enough to believe he wasn’t indulging in the opportunity.

Still… her crush held strong into the end of the tour.

Afterwards, Echo went back into the studio to record their sophomore album and Livien returned to their own label. Liz figured her chance to ever say something had past. That was until she and Max were contacted about writing a duet to play for a charity event.

Two hours were spent in the studio trying to come up with the perfect combination of their two differing tastes. In the end, the two had a difficult time reaching a compromise and Max began to get frustrated being cooped up in the studio. His suggestion had been to adjourn to his house where he had recording equipment and where there would be no producers breathing down their necks to come up with something solid.

Broken had been conceived that night and in the process, the two finally acted on an attraction that ended up being mutual.

Two months later, they were each contracted to do a third leg of their previous tour due their growing popularity and immensely high record sales. It was a much shorter ride but ensured the two some more time together. If asked, they simply wrote of their friendship as a result from having to work together on a joint song. Behind closed doors though, the two were very much a couple who quickly grow to care a great deal about one another.

Max admired the obvious strength Liz held and found her more endearing because she didn’t even realize that strength lied within her. At seventeen, there were still so many things that were new to her and being around Liz, Max had the opportunity to relive everything through new eyes. It was why she originally believed he looked to her as a novelty that would eventually lose its appeal.

Max, on the other hand, grew to care so much about her because of the way she listened. He didn’t have to pretend with her. She was someone who finally looked behind the star and saw the man who wasn’t nearly as confident as he appeared to be. With time, he learned that it was her past that made it easy for her to understand his and that realization made him want to protect her. He never wanted to see her in pain… never wanted to have to see her frown.

Yet even then, both still wondered if what they shared between them was the real thing. Time was the only thing that eventually made both acknowledge what they truly felt for each other.

“Was Darcy ever one of them?” she queried in a tentative voice.

“No” came Max’s simple answer. “I’ve never looked at Darcy that way. In my head she still belongs to Sean… you know?”

Nodding, Liz picked up her fork and watched Max walk out of the room. A few moments later she heard his voice calling out to Tyler, asking if he had already eaten breakfast. When he returned alone, Liz figured the little boy wouldn’t be joining them after all. “She looks different now” Liz found herself commenting, deciding that Darcy’s original hair color suited her much better than the blonde did.

“She’s a different person now” Max replied and took a seat across from Liz. Instantly, she pushed the jar of jam towards him then cursed herself for easily falling back into a routine with him. “So what are you going to do about tonight’s show?” he asked, choosing not to comment on her gesture.

“I don’t want to go” Liz immediately answered. “But I don’t think I’m going to be able to get out of it” she sadly added.

“Well I’m sure it would totally piss Tess off, which I’m definitely not opposed to but… if you wanted… I could come with you” he suggested then quickly shoved a piece of toast in his mouth before he could say anything else.

Liz’s gaze snapped up as she considered the offer. He was right, it would piss Tess off but Liz couldn’t imagine having to go back to Hollywood alone. She also had to acknowledge the fact that despite their rocky history, Liz still trusted Max. He was still the only one who knew her better than anyone and if she had to return to her hometown, she couldn’t imagine doing it with anyone else by her side. “What about Tyler? I thought you were taking care of him today” she asked.

“Just for a couple hours while Darcy visits her counselor” Max answered, all the while trying not to read too much in Liz’s obvious openness to having him tag along. “We could even work on your music so it will seem like I have a reason for being there.”

“The truth is that I’d love for you to come with me but it isn’t your responsibility to make sure I’m okay” Liz stated when a momentary bout of uncertainty assaulted her senses. “I’m sorry that I woke you up last night and that I basically invited myself over. You shouldn’t have to deal with me and my angst from the past” she said, watching as frown settled across Max’s lips.

“Listen, Parker… since we’re being honest with each other, I want to get one more thing out in the open” Max declared once Liz had finished her spiel. “You and I fought and we broke up. We didn’t see each other for three years but that didn’t change much of anything for me, at least not about the way I feel towards you. You still mean more to me than anyone else ever will and I want another chance with you. If I can’t have it, I at least want to stay a part of your life… outside of producing. Coming to me last night makes me think that maybe you feel the same way. Am I wrong?” he asked.

Closing her eyes against the onslaught of emotions he dredged up, Liz tried to get her beating heart under control. “Max…there’s always going to be a part of me that will always hold onto a part of you. I accepted it a long time ago but to be more than that… well I don’t know if I could go through it all again. I don’t know if could open myself up, only to have to let you go one more time.”

“Who says you’ll ever have to let go?” Max questioned while gazing straight into Liz’s eyes.

“Because we tried before Max and we failed” Liz answered and refused to acknowledge the pain she felt while admitting it. “We weren’t strong enough to withstand all the changes we went through… we weren’t honest and open enough about what was going wrong.”

“We were also two different people then, Parker.” Frustrated, he pushed his plate away and began to pace the length of the kitchen. “Don’t you think it means anything that after all this time, we still love each other? That we can still look to each other like you did last night? Because to me, it means there are still feelings there. We could build on that but we’d both have to be willing to try” he said and stopped right in front of Liz’s chair. Gently, he took her hands in his and pulled her up to stand before him. “I want you, Liz. I want you because you were the one person I was ever myself around. I want you because you’re my equal… because you complete me in a way I never imagined possible. I want you because even after all this time, I’m still hopelessly in love with you.”

Fighting back tears caused by his heartfelt words, Liz stared into his fiery hazel eyes and saw the love behind his words. It was there, shamelessly on display for her to see and recognize. “I screwed up before but I promise I’ll do everything in my power to make sure you never hurt again. Let me be there for you. Let me be everything you need because…. Because you’re already everything I need.”

“You don’t know me anymore” Liz cried out because she was on the verge of giving in.

“Yeah I do” Max countered and surprised Liz by walking away. Blinking in confusion, Liz turned towards the door he disappeared through just as he walked back in, carrying with him two jewel cases and a sheet of notebook paper. “These are the lyrics you gave me to look at. And these are your last two albums. All I have to do is turn on the stereo and you let me back into your heart. It’s where you write from… it’s how I know you. The music is you Liz and its amazing… it’s everything inside of you.”

A quiet sob escaped her lips as Liz realized he was right. She put her heart and soul into her songs and Max had always been able to read it as easily as a sheet of music. “I can’t get hurt again. I honestly don’t think I could survive getting my heart broken by Max Evans twice in one lifetime.”

“Then it’s a good thing I don’t want to break your heart” Max replied and gently pushed the hair away from her face. “Give me one more chance and I promise you won’t regret it.”

Closing her eyes, Liz thought back to her time with Max. She pushed past the sadness and arguments while instead focusing on their first kiss. She thought about the first time they made love… the first song they wrote together… the first time he told her he loved her… all the nights they spent together, talking, learning and falling deeper in love. She thought about how he had always remained faithful despite all the women crawling around to get his attention. How he always supported her, encouraged and stood beside her. She wanted to believe that it could be like that again. That the Max standing in front of her now had changed, evolved into someone she could safely return her heart to.

Not it was a matter of chance and deciding whether or not her heart could stand the possible beating.

In the end, it was really a choice between giving a once incredible love a second chance, or floating around in limbo while never really moving on because she couldn’t let him go. Before she could talk herself out of it, Liz leaned up and tentatively pressed her lips against his. “Please don’t break my heart” she whispered when his arms came around her.

“I promise” he murmured and wrapped his arms securely around her waist. “We’ll take it slow. One day at a time.” Because in the end, what good is existing when you can live?

[To_Kiss_A_Frog]

Hi everyone! Thank you for all your wonderful feedback. The song used is Halo by Bethany Joy Lenz. Thanks to:

Shadowlynxbehr - Thanks! Glad you like Max
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Chapter 8 - Halo

“Well at least I know why Tess wasn’t answering her cell phone” Liz stated as she replaced the hotel phone on its cradle. An exasperated expression marred her face while she shook her head in frustration. Max found himself frowning along and watched the woman who he loved more than anything, drop down into a chair and run shaky hands over the course material of her denim jeans. “She didn’t even leave a message at the front desk. She just checked out at six this morning and apparently Kyle’s gone too” she informed, knowing exactly what had caused the two to cut their trip short.

“I don’t understand” Max admitted and lowered himself onto the couch beside Liz. “Tess is a tyrant when it comes to you and the band. Why in the hell would she take off on the day you’re supposed to appear live on some show?” he questioned, watching as a guilty look quickly replaced Liz’s irritation. “Why do I get the feeling I’m not going to like this answer?” he asked pointedly.

“Because you won’t” Liz replied in a simple tone. “Let’s just say that you and I still have a lot of things to catch up on and… well Kyle just found out the particulars of one of those stories last night. Needless to say, he wasn’t happy about it” she stated, observing the way Max’s expression transformed into one of no nonsense. Liz knew then and there that it would be no use trying to give him the run around because he wouldn’t be satisfied until she gave him some sort elaboration.

“What does anything in our past have to do with Kyle?” he questioned while leaning back against the soft cushions of the overstuffed couch. “Other than the obvious link of being in Echo?”

This, Liz thought, will either make us stronger or tear us apart. It wasn’t that Max was unreasonable but he might feel manipulated… by both Liz and Tess. Still, she kept telling herself that she did what she had to do and that Max would surely understand. “The day I showed up at the studio… when I was supposed to be at Alex’s birthday party” Liz tentatively began. “I was angry at Tess because was spewing the usual insults about you. Nothing that either of wasn’t already used to” she added. “But Kyle picked up on the fact that there was something behind our bickering and last night, he finally came to me to find out what it was” she admitted, thinking about the look of betrayal on her friend’s face after learning the sordid details of a past better left forgotten.

“I’m listening” Max replied, his way of nudging her to continue with the story she was so obviously reluctant to tell. Liz, for the most part, wondered whether or not the truth had been the best thing for Kyle the night before or if she should have sent him back to Tess without an answer. Maybe it would have been better coming from his girlfriend though Liz supposed she would never know which had been the right choice.

“Max… before I finish this, I need you to listen long enough to find out my reasons, okay?” she requested, watching as more apprehension filled his eyes.

Dutifully, he nodded his head in agreement and Liz knew the action was as good as any spoken promise.

“Okay” she murmured and steeled herself for this next part. “When you and I went public, Tess started a file… one filled with information on our pasts. I’m not even sure how she found some of the knowledge she had been she knew about Philip. About what he was like with Diane about the way she was with… other men. She knew about what he tried to do to me that day in your house” she admitted and saw Max’ jaw tick angrily at the memory. “The drinking, the drugs… all the messes Maria had to clean up for you guys. She even knew that you were talking to another label even though you were still under contract” Liz stated, knowing how disastrous that could have been if his label had thought he was trying to breach his contract. “Basically anything that happened that either of us would ever want to keep a secret, she knew about.”

Not more than a moment passed before Max asked, in a controlled voice, “When did you find out she had this?”

“Not while we were dating” Liz immediately assured. The last thing she wanted was for Max to somehow believe she knew and never mentioned it to him. “I found out the night I tried to go to you. After I found out about… about Sean” she quietly murmured. “I still had at least ten venues to go and Tess went ballistic when she found out I was trying to leave. I told her nothing could stop me and she pulled out the file. She said I had two days to see you and if I wasn’t back in Seattle by then, that she’d go public with everything she knew” Liz informed and watched for any sign from Max as to how he was handling it all.

Beneath the obvious anger reflected in his features, she saw something else though she didn’t quite recognize it. The impulse to ask what he was thinking grew stronger with each passing moment though when he finally opened his mouth to speak, Liz found herself shocked by his words.

“I’m glad she did that” he admitted and ran a shaky hand over his face. He hadn’t shaved recently and there was a dark stumble growing over his cheeks, reminding Liz of the rocker he once was. The years hadn’t really aged him, he was still devastatingly handsome but there was something new to his features. An understanding, maybe. An inner strength that hadn’t been there when they were dating.

Sure she believed he was strong. He handled so much adversity in his past and came through it as strong as anyone she knew. Yet in a way, he was almost untouched. He saw the world in two colors, black and white. The answer was either yes or no and there were never shades of gray. Maybe it was because he was young and powerful or maybe it was a result of the way he had grown up. But looking at him now, Liz finally saw the shades of gray. There was something in his eyes that personified the inner strength he always held deep within, now revealed to her with a single look.

“Why?” It was one word, one syllable and conveyed all the confusion Liz felt.

“Because I was a mess and if you had stayed with me… I would have dragged you down too” Max answered. It was then that Liz finally recognized what had been resting beneath his anger… shame. He was ashamed of the way he had been, of the things he had done.

The strange thing was that Liz had basically said the same thing to Kyle. She told him that in her own twisted way, Tess was just looking out for Liz who was too vulnerable and emotional to think rationally. It was something she believed but even so, she would have gladly made the mistake of sticking around to help Max work through his problems. It was ironic now that Max would say those same words to her and now, she wasn’t so sure if she believed in them.

“Maybe it would have been but…”

“No, Liz, there is no maybe about it” Max interrupted and lowered his eyes away from her expressive gaze. “I was angry that you left me but the truth is that I’m glad you did. It might not have been intentional but I would have kept leaning on you and eventually the weight of it all would have been too much for you to carry. You would have lost yourself in me and I wouldn’t have been able to forgive myself if I had done that to you” he confessed and only looked up when she gently touched his hand. She nearly gasped at the remorse he held and without thinking shifted until she was cradled in his lap.

“You aren’t that person anymore, Max. The fact that you can admit all this to me proves that” Liz stated with no amount of uncertainty.

He didn’t immediately respond except to wrap his arms around her snuggling form. Liz understood though. In a song, Max poured his entire heart and soul into every word, every chord but when it came to words in conversation, it was harder for him to express what he felt. “So what happened with Kyle?” he eventually asked, leading Liz to believe he had accepted her declaration.

“He tried getting it out of Tess and when she wouldn’t budge, he came down here to find out from me” Liz replied, thinking back to the look of utter betrayal on his face. “The truth is I’m not even really that angry with Tess about it anymore, I was just annoyed that day at the party. I have no idea what’s going on in Kyle’s head though, or if he plans on telling the others about the secrets I’ve been keeping” she mused aloud, all the while wondering if her honesty the night before had done irreparable damage.

“I think it’ll be okay” Max stated while running his fingers through her hair. “If your friends care about you as much as I remember, then they’ll understand” he shrugged, filling Liz with a sense of relief that only he could provide.

“I hope so” she whispered, thinking how bittersweet it would be to gain Max back on the same weekend she lost all her friends.


~&~&~&~&~&


“We have a great show for you tonight. We have Kelsey Grammer who is playing Dr. Hank McCoy in this summer’s upcoming blockbuster, X3. Grey’s Anatomy star Patrick Dempsey but first, our musical guest Liz Parker who fronts hit band, Echo.”

A round of applause greeted Liz as the spotlights shone in her direction, cueing the tech beside her to hit play on the music recording her band had provided for the night. The song was one from their latest album… lent to the TV show One Tree Hill for their new season and chosen by the producer after Tess informed them it was too soon to release anything new she was working on.

“I never promised you a ray of light…. I never promised there’d be sunshine everyday…. I’ll give you everything I have…. The good the bad…” she sang, loosing herself in the music to the point where she felt, rather than heard each next beat. It was always like this. Every song blocked out the real world until nothing existed but her and the music. It had been why she latched on to the idea of performing as a teenager; it was the best way to forget everything else that had plagued her life.

“Why do you put me on a pedestal…? I’m so up high that I can’t see the ground below…. So help me down, you’ve got it wrong…. I don’t belong there…One thing is clear…. I wear a halo…. I wear a halo when you look at me… but standing from here…. You wouldn’t say so…. You wouldn’t so if you were me…”

By the end of the chorus, the crowd was cheering so loudly that Liz felt like she was performing in a large New York City venue, rather than a small television studio. Their sounds echoed off the walls, making it next to impossible to hear the music though Liz didn’t mind in the least. She didn’t need to hear it to know what was next. “So pull me from the pedestal…. I don’t belong there…. One thing is clear…. I wear a halo…. I wear a halo when you look at me… but standing from here…. You wouldn’t say so…. You wouldn’t so if you were me…”

As the song drew to a close, Liz lowered the microphone and bowed gratefully to the audience. The camera panned back to Jimmy as Liz was escorted onto his set and perched herself in the seat nearest his desk. “So word on the town is that after five successful albums with Echo, you’ve decided to go solo. You wanna tell us about that… why decided to make the change?” he asked after the two exchanged pleasantries with one another.

“Well I’m sure you’ve heard that our bass player, Alex Whitman is an expectant father” Liz stated, pausing as the crowd rewarded the announcement with another round of applause. “He wanted to take some time off to be around when his wife gave birth and the other guys agreed that it’d be nice to have a little vacation” she shrugged, offering a small smile when Jimmy merely nodded his head. “But we’re hoping to all get back into the studio together after my solo album gets released so… it definitely isn’t the end for Echo” she assured, taking a sip of water as Jimmy went on to the next question.

One by one, she answered all of his inquiries until he turned back to the camera and announced it was time for a commercial break. “Thanks for coming on the show, Liz. You were great” he complimented as she rose from seat to head back into the dressing room. From the TV inside, she would finish watching the show and afterwards, the body guard Tess insisted always accompany her to public events, would lead her and Max out of the studio.

Unlike many other celebrities, Liz had never received any threats that would warrant the protection of a big, burly guard but since she was a female and often traveled alone, Tess believed it was only sensible to keep Simon around in case a fan got out of hand. Liz vehemently disagreed but realized it was better to give in than to argue, something that Tess had grown increasingly good at over the years.

“You looked beautiful out there” Max greeted the moment Liz opened the door. Her response was a bright smile that lit up her features. “I don’t like the song though” he admitted, immediately shifting her grin into an annoyed frown. “I mean… the music is good and all but… there’s something wrong with the lyrics” he said and attempted, to no avail, to wrap his arms around Liz. Turning away, she didn’t notice his amused smirk and instead began to pull out a set of clothes to change into.

It wasn’t as if she couldn’t take criticism. Every day someone slammed her music, whether it was a listening or an executive or even a band mate. Liz was used to the fact that not everyone would like her music but knowing Max disapproved of one of her songs seemed to hit a very sore spot.

“Would you mind waiting outside while I change?” she requested in a detached voice and nearly jumped a foot in the air when she suddenly felt Max press his body up against her back.

“You know, you have me up on this pedestal, Max and I’m not this perfect person. I make mistakes” he murmured against her ear, filling Liz with a memory that had managed to escape her mind during the time she was writing the song. The words had been familiar, almost as if they were spoken before but Liz couldn’t quite put her finger on it. Now, like a flood of water over a broken dam, it all came rushing back.

“…I’m not this perfect person. I make mistakes” Liz stated while clutching her pillow tightly against her chest. Drops of water fell from her wet hair, caught by the pristine white sheets that the terry cloth robe had been unable to absorb. “And this one was… probably the biggest one I’ve ever made but… it was mine to make” she reminded, shuddering in remembrance of the night she just had.

“I just think you could do a lot better than Rick but you’re right… it was your choice to make” Max relented with a half hearted shrug. What he wanted to say was that she could have him but he couldn’t force the words out. She was too young, he knew it as well as anyone else and allowing her to know he had any interest in her would only make things that much harder. So he gritted his teeth and pretended like a concerned friend rather than the jealous guy who had feelings for the young punk princess, or so they called her.

“Thanks though. For being coming by after I freaked out on the phone” Liz said, deciding that despite her tough girl bravado, she would have to end things with Rick. He was a poor substitute for the person she really wanted and though she understood Max would never look twice at her, she knew it wasn’t fair to use the sweet roadie as a way to get over her crush.

“Anytime, Parker” he responded and ran a lone finger down the side of her face. It was a gesture of affection, Liz knew, but she couldn’t help the way her body shivered in response.

“I don’t care what you say. I still think you deserve that pedestal” Max said as Liz turned around in his arms. “And the halo.”

[To_Kiss_A_Frog]

Hi everyone! Thank you for your encouraging feedback... I'm glad you're all liking this so far! The song used is 45 by Shinedown. Thank you to:

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Chapter 9 - Forty Five

“What are we looking at? Eleven or thirteen?” Liz inquired as Max walked through the studio door, guitar in hand. He had just come from a meeting upstairs with Brody, regarding all the details of the upcoming album. It was something Liz had never been able to do, sit around a large table with a bunch of executives who knew nothing about the creative process involved in writing music. They all just assumed musicians were genies who could simply blink their eyes and produce a song in a matter of minutes.

“Thirteen since you’re name is already established” Max answered and set his guitar down in favor of taking a seat on the piano bench. “Standard procedure. One officially released at the end of the week to radio stations, something up tempo to be your first single. Then in two weeks you’ll shoot the video for MTV and three after that we’ll release the second single, probably a ballad of some sort” he explained as Liz sat still in her stool, nodding once in response.

She appeared to be lost in her thoughts though Max could easily decipher what was going on in her mind. She was going through the lyrics in her head, mentally trying to decide which two of her songs she wanted to be showcased. “What’d you got?” he asked after several contemplative moments.

“How about using ‘Going Under’ for the first single?” Liz questioned and reached for her own guitar which had been neatly resting on a stand beside her. “It’s kind of heavy so it should get some good radio time with the rock stations and then the ballad could target the more alternative stations” she shrugged, absentmindedly strumming the recently tuned strings. “What do you think?” she added, shooting Max a penetrating stare.

“You’re meeting with the new guys today and if they don’t work out, we can have another group in tomorrow” Max stated, referring to the backup band he was assembling for her. Liz wasn’t particularly concerned with the fit though. Max knew her taste and what she looked for in a musician. She had no doubt he had found her a group of people she could work with. “After that, we’ll figure out which song to release first. Some of the tabs might need to be adjusted to suit their style” he said turned around to face the black and white piano keys.

Slowly, he ran his fingers over each one before deciding his place. “Why don’t we try the first one we wrote?” he suggested, thinking about the song she had yet to give him lyrics for.

Liz kept telling him that it wasn’t quite right yet. It was obvious that she had high expectations for that one particular song, more than any of the others they had begun to write. Max wasn’t sure what was so special about the song… yet, but he decided he’d find out soon enough whenever she produced the lyrics.

Without waiting for a response, he closed his eyes and allowed his fingers to glide over the keys, coaxing out a beautiful sound from within the old grand piano.

She sat, listening for her cue to enter and mentally going over the words in her head. She could hear the song as she wanted it to sound and allowed her eyes to flutter shut as she soaked it all in. The music filled her in a way that few thing had ever been able to. Unconsciously, her lips began to move, faintly murmuring the words meant to fit in during each verse. It was coming together, she just needed one more line and then it would be complete. She could let Max in to the way she had been feeling, prior to him walking back into her life.

“What’s wrong” he asked as the last of the song fluttered away. He had turned to look over his shoulder and found a frown marring Liz’s features. Her eyes remained closed, almost grasping onto the final notes as though they would give her the answer to whatever silent question she was pursuing.

“Nothing” she shook her head. “I was just trying to hear something” Liz replied and settled her gaze on his face. It was something she knew. Every expression… every line… every mark and every scar. She knew Max, inside and out and briefly found herself wondering how she had been able to tuck him away in a neat little package in the back of her mind for so long. Now, like a jack ready to pop out of his box, Max was no longer willing to remain hidden. He was a part of her life again and Liz tightly grasped onto that.

Suddenly she found herself filled with questions. She didn’t want there to be any more barriers, each had built enough of them over the years. She wanted to tear them all down with stories and truths. It was why she found herself asking a question she had previously been too timid to ask. “What was it like? In rehab, I mean. What was it like?”

“Humbling” Max automatically answered. If he was curious as to why she was asking such a question, he didn’t let on. “More humbling that anything else I’d ever experienced” he said and turned back to the piano. “We only have the sheet music for three songs” he then added, effectively closing the subject back up. Liz felt a sigh in her mouth but held it in despite her disappointment. Just because she was ready to talk about it didn’t mean he was, she thought. “If we want to get this album out on time, we’re going to have to push a little harder.”

Wordlessly nodding, Liz contemplated another questions, one she wasn’t sure would have a positive reaction. “Would you consider letting me play one of your songs?” she worked up the courage to ask.

While they were getting back on track, it seemed to be a slow process that Liz was eager to prompt. She had yet to play her music for him, just as he had yet to play his music for her. Each wanted to let the other in but was too afraid of being rejected for the things they felt and the songs they wrote. Now, she was taking a step to remedy it and only hoped that in return, Max would take a step of his own.

“I don’t think they’d really be appropriate” Max quietly replied and with his back turned, Liz couldn’t see the pain reflected in his eyes. Instead, she took it as a sign of rejection and blinked away the tears threatening to fall. In an effort to push past the sadness she felt, she returned her attention to the six strings, deciding that maybe there were more walls between them than she had originally believed.

“Yeah… that’s fine… I understand” she murmured and allowed her fingers to set on one chord… the beginning of the song they had just played. Flawlessly, her left hand glided over the fret, transitioning for the bridge and silently hearing the words in her head.

With her eyes closed and her heart locked in the song, she didn’t hear or see Max rise from the bench. Quietly he stalked forward until he stood before her and gently plucked the guitar out of her hands. The movement caused her to still and her eyes to snap open in surprise. Without a sound passing from either, she allowed him to take the guitar and watched him perch on the stood adjacent to her own.

His fingers moved effortlessly, producing a sound that was so reminiscent of the music he once made. But this time his eyes remained open, focused on Liz as he opened his mouth to sing.

“Send away for a priceless gift…. One not subtle, one not on the list…. Send away for a perfect world….. One not simply, so absurd….. In these times of doing what you’re told…. You keep these feelings no one knows…. What ever happened to the young man’s heart…? Swallowed by pain, as he slowly fell apart….

And I’m staring down the barrel of a 45…. Swimming through the ashes of another life…. No real reason to accept the way things have changed…. Staring down the barrel of a 45….”

Water fell from the corners of her eyes as she lost herself in his song. She wondered when he wrote it. Had it been just after Sean’s death or when he sat alone in rehab? And in that moment, the idea that she might have lost him before she had the chance to find him again terrified Liz more than she could have possibly imagined.

A voice filled with passion sang the next verse, filling Liz with the realization that this song had been written for so many people. There was Sean… and Darcy… himself and then there was her.

“Send a message to the unborn child…. Keep your eyes open for a while…. In a box high up on the shelf, left for you, no one else…. There’s a piece of a puzzle known as life…. Wrapped in guilt, sealed up tight….

What ever happened to the young man’s heart…? Swallowed by pain, as he slowly fell apart….”

His voice rose, surrounding and enveloping Liz in his emotions. He was letting her in and in the process, was becoming a part of her again. It was a strange thing to fall in love with someone through their music.

Teenage girls crushed on Max Evans, the hot singer who fronted a main stream rock band. When she was sixteen, Liz had been one of the girls. Watching his videos on MTV, listening to his songs on the radio, all the while wondering what it would be like to meet the infamous musicians whose music spoke to her more than anyone else’s words ever could have.

But that was another Liz Parker and the image she perceived had been far from the truth. She didn’t love him for his image or for what she might have believed his songs meant. She loved him for the person she knew, one who had struggled so often in life yet still came out on top. It was pure, raw strength that got him to the place he finally stood in and Liz felt a small sense of pride knowing that she had been a part of that, she was a part of him.

How was it possible to fall so deep in love for someone that no matter how much time past, they remained inside of you, she wondered?

If he expected her to be surprised to find tears lingering behind his own eyes, he would have been mistaken. Instead he found understanding resting in her expressive brown orbs, filling him with an indescribable feeling. One he had always associated with Liz. She wanted to say something, anything to make him see how strongly she still felt. When the words escaped her, an irony if she ever heard one, Liz mimicked his earlier gesture, plucking the guitar from his hands.

Instantly his palms moved to rest against her hips. Liz smiled in response and gently cupped his face between her hands. With her voice stuttering shakily, she rested her forehead against his and quietly murmured, “I love you, Max.”

He had used the words, the day they got back together and then at night as they slept beside one another. Liz had yet to return the sentiment. She knew she loved him, she always had but actually voicing the words out loud had proved to be a difficulty.

In the back of her mind, she supposed it was because a part of her was still scared of getting hurt by him. She was still that seventeen year old girl who shyly listened to his every word, taking his every musical suggestion. She was still that twenty year old standing on a bridge, begging him to live his life… pleading with him to heal. She now realized that along with those girls stood a woman who wasn’t going to let fear dictate her life.

“God, I love you too, Parker” he whispered and dragged her lips down against his.

And then she let go… of everything holding her back, everything holding her down… she let it all go and just… felt.

The scruff on his face tickled her skin as he pulled her closer. With passion filled eyes, Liz looked down at him and found her lust reflected in his own hazel gaze. Without question, he stood up from his seat and led her over to the couch in the far corner of the room.

Liz could remember countless times spent on the couch back when Livien used that particular studio to record every song. Once the others had gone home for the night, leaving only Max to play around with the tabs or tweak the lyrics, he and Liz would bounce ideas off of one another, either about his music or hers. They almost never agreed with one another, their styles each uniquely different. It was then that they’d begin to argue with another, each insisting that their direction was best.

Irritation would spark something far more interesting and before long, the two would be locked together on the couch, working out their frustrations on each other’s bodies.

Slowly, the two settled against the old worn cushions. Max’s lips trailed down the smooth skin of her neck as nimble fingers worked the buttons on her vintage peasant blouse. Liz shivered as the material pooled to the floor, exposing her skin to the cold, air conditioned air. Eager to feel his skin against hers, Liz reached for the hem of Max’s plain white t-shirt and pulled it up off his body. With their bodies pressed together, their lips returned their earlier exploration.

Liz arched into his hands as they cupped her breasts over the lace of her bra. “Max…” she lightly moaned as his fingers deftly pinched her nipples into two aroused peaks. Both impatient, he reached behind her body to unhook the offending garment and tossed it aside, along with both of their shirts. Their mouths mingled, tongues dueling for dominance as his hands slowly trailed up her legs, lifting the material of her skirt with every inch his palms touched.

Liz wound her arms around his neck and lifted her hips when he gently tugged the skirt down her legs. The small scrap of blue lace quickly followed, leaving her bare and unabashed before him.

With loving reverence, his lips continued their journey downward and centered on her breast. He nibbled the supple flesh, laving her perfume scented skin before closing his lips around one turgid nipple. A low moan of approval fell from Liz’s lips as he suckled the sensitive peak and gently scraped his teeth over the aroused bud. He moved his attention to the right side and sucked on her nipple until she was crying out for more.

The journey continued downward, over the flat expanse of her stomach leading down to the place that ached for attention. Yet Liz surprised Max but tugging on his arm, forcing his heated gaze up towards her aroused eyes. “I want you inside of me” she panted and helped tug his jeans down his muscular hips. He kicked his shoes off and discarded the rest of his clothing until he lay above her, naked and painfully hard.

Gently, he pushed her legs apart and settled between them. With a kiss on her lips, he pushed inside of her and felt, rather than heard her moan against his mouth. Her arms settled against his shoulders and arched into his body as he slowly pulled out. A groan fell from his lips as she tightened her muscles, holding him within her moist depths.

His thick length speared her wet walls, drawing out more sounds of pleasured arousal. They were quick to find a rhythm as he thrust in and out, filling her with each motion.

No one had ever been able to make her feel as complete as Max did. He knew her body as well as he knew his own and like a finely tuned instrument, played her to perfection. “I love you” she panted as heat crept up her body. Curling her legs around his waist, she held on tightly as he took her for a wild ride, pounding into her with the force of their love and lust. Sweat formed on his brow from the exertion of their love making. He pushed her legs higher against his body, angling her so that he reached deeper with every thrust.

“I love you” he returned as he felt her walls contract around him. Encouraged by her low moans and uneven breathing, he latched his lips to hers and began to thrust faster.

“Oh my god… ah… Max!” she screamed, the words tearing from her throat as waves of ecstasy wracked her body.

As she tightened around him, holding him so deep within her, Max continued to thrust into her welcoming depths until he felt his own body shake with the force of his release. Her name was a low groan of passion on his lips as Max let go, shooting thick spurts of cum into body.

With their breathing erratic and their hearts beating a fast staccato, Liz held tight to his body, unwilling to let him go just yet. “I don’t want to crush you” he murmured and tenderly pushed the errant strands of hair away from her face.

“I’m not ready to let you go” she voiced with so much emotion that Max couldn’t help but search her eyes.

“You never have to” he replied and shifted her so that she rested between him and the back of the couch. “I never did” he whispered and pressed a chaste kiss against her lips.

[To_Kiss_A_Frog]

Hi everyone, thanks for the feedback Song used is "To Make You Feel My Love" by either Garth Brooks or Josh Kelley.

Ellie
begonia9508

Chapter 10 - Feel My Love

“Ah hell… you’re such a girl” Max teased as he looked over at Liz and found tears lingering in the corners of her eyes. In front of them, the TV continued to blare out ‘I Don’t Wanna Miss a Thing’ as the number one video of 1998. The pair had been watching the top ten videos of the decade when the old Aerosmith song began to play and at the first sight of the Armageddon movie clips, Liz had begun to cry. “Baby, I’m sorry. Come here” he said, holding his arms out invitingly when she looked over at him, a pitiful expression adorning her beautiful features.

“It’s just… sad… you know?” she asked and buried her face against his chest, soaking his t-shirt with the tears now steadily falling from her eyes. “I mean, it’s a lose, lose situation. It’s either her dad or… or her fiancé and… and no matter what happens she’s gonna be happy… and sad” Liz attempted to explain. Thankfully she was too engrossed in the video to see the look of amusement Max wore.

“It’s just a movie, Parker” Max attempted to soothe while gently running his fingers through her soft, chestnut locks. Then, because he couldn’t stand to see sadness on her face, he began to sing. “When the rain is blowing in your face…. And the whole world is on your case…. I could offer you a warm embrace…. To make you feel my love.”

His voice was a soft whisper against her ear as Liz allowed her eyes to flutter closed, relishing the quiet timber of each sung word. She felt herself fall a little deeper in love with him every time he sang to her, now more than ever since she knew how much he hated the song he sang. It was a country hit, written for Hope Floats, a movie Liz dragged him out to see. She remembered telling him in the theater that that song could make her happy no matter what mood she was in.

“When evening shadows and the stars appear… And there’s no one there to dry your tears…. I could hold for a million years…. To make you feel my love.” Liz shifted so that she rested in his lap, straddling him with her pajama covered legs. Her arms looped around his shoulders in a loose embrace while his hands crept up to gently cup her face. Max’s expressive hazel eyes searched her own brown ones, singing from his heart, speaking to hers.

“I could make you happy, make your dreams come true…. No there’s nothing that I wouldn’t do….” Liz sang along, her voice a perfect compliment to the soothing, sexy timber of Max’s own voice. “Go to the ends of the earth for you…. To make you feel my love…. To make you feel my love…. To make you feel my love.” Together, they faded out like a well rehearsed duo. This time the moisture in her eyes was out of endearment rather than sadness.

Before she began dating Max, Liz had never realized how incredibly beautiful and romantic it was to have someone sing to you. Yet he did it whenever she asked, no matter how many hours he spent in the studio recording, practicing or touring, he always had something left for her whenever she asked. In return, Liz sang silly little songs to make him laugh whenever he was having a hard day.

Their band mates often teased them both. His declared Max was being cheesy. Liz’s decided she was being silly. Their opinions didn’t matter much, at least not about that particular issue. “You’re such a cheese ball” Liz teased and hopped up, tripping over Max’s legs in her haste to get away before he could tackle her and put his fingers to use, mercifully tickling her for the comment.

A phone ringing in the distance pulled Liz out of her peaceful slumber. For several nights, since she had been trying to finish up her lyrics, memories of her time spent with Max had come back in full force during her dreams. Now, instead of the sadness and dark moments, she was calling forth some of their happier times spent together. It felt like a huge relief to Liz who was ready to step forward with Max rather than stand still in the past.

The insistent ringing continued to buzz in Liz’s head. Irritated at being awoken, she swatted around on the night stand for her cell phone. “What?” she finally answered and rolled over, only to find a hard body pressed against her side. Without even realizing it, a small smile crept over her lips as Liz looked over and saw Max still peacefully slumbering, holding tightly to half her pillow.

“You have to fix this” Tess declared without preamble. Taken by surprised, Liz shook her head once in an effort to jostle her mind awake. If she wasn’t mistaken, her manager sounded almost hysterical and frightened at the same time. Her voice was raspy, as though she had been crying, and was tinged with obvious fatigue. “He won’t talk to me he won’t… god, this is so screwed up” she all but cried in a tone that had Liz wincing and feeling sorry for her innocent ears. “Please, Liz. You have to fix this” Tess repeated, obviously trying her best to sound much stronger than she actually felt.

“What makes you think I can do anything about it?” Liz whispered, trying not to wake Max from whatever dream had put the contented smile on his face.

A little over two weeks had past since the night Kyle showed up outside her hotel room door, asking for the truth. Liz had correctly assumed that he and Tess had a falling out afterwards but what had come as a surprise was the fact that he had taken off to some unknown location. The message on her answering machine at home said he didn’t blame her but that he needed some time to himself. Kyle had had certain truths kept from him and Liz wholeheartedly understood his desire to put some distance between his heart and his mind.

Soon after, she learned that none of her band mates had any idea where their friend had gone either. Alex, who had taken Isabel to visit her parents, had no clue that anything at all was wrong. He believed Kyle was just taking a little vacation while Jesse seemed to know a little more on the subject. He had been home to personally take the call Kyle made just before he left and though he didn’t understand his friend’s distress, he did know it existed.

“Because you’re the one he thinks I hurt” Tess snapped as though it should have been obvious. Slowly, the old Tess began to seep through the desperate veneer of a concerned girlfriend. “Can’t you try to talk to him? Make him understand that I did what was best for everyone involved” she said. Then, as though the request drained all her energy, she emitted a tired sigh, sniffling pathetically.

Briefly, Liz considered the request being made. She wasn’t entirely sure that she could make a difference, assuming Kyle took her call. Then there was a small part of her that felt like Tess was getting what she deserved after the way she manipulated the situation in her favor, three years before. Liz almost wanted her to work for it but that was overshadowed by the realization that any tricks Tess might pull out of desperation would only hurt Kyle in the end.

Liz didn’t want her friend to suffer because she wanted to teach her manager a lesson. It was only out of concern for Kyle that caused her to emit her own quiet sigh. “On one condition, Tess” she stated in no uncertain terms, making the blonde aware that this one condition was nonnegotiable. “If I talk to him… convince him to give you a chance to fix things, I want the file you have on Max. Originals, copies… notes… anything. I want every piece of ammunition against him or I’ll tell Kyle that I asked and you refused” she threatened, now feeling more awake as a rush of energy flowed through her veins. “How would it look to him? He’d think you were still trying to play games” she added, unnecessarily pointing out a fact Tess had to already know.

Silence followed her request, leading Liz to believe that Tess was weighing her options. She wondered whether or not Tess was willing to give up the power she held in order to get back the man she loved.

“Okay” finally came in a small, vulnerable voice that Liz had never heard her cut throat manager use before. “Whatever you want. Just… just make him understand” Tess added and for a split second, Liz realized that where Kyle was concerned, Tess could actually be a decent person.

“I’ll try” Liz replied and clicked the end button before Tess could utter another word.

“Who was that?” Max quietly murmured, causing Liz’s gaze to snap back towards his serene features. A wave of love assaulted her senses as she replaced the phone on the nightstand and slipped into his warm, familiar embrace.

With all the time they had recently spent in the studio, Liz had been spending her nights tucked away in his bed since his place was closer than hers. It almost felt like a time warp to her when she padded into the kitchen and found him sitting there, drinking a cup of coffee. Officially, the two had never lived together during the years they dated. There were days, sometimes weeks a time where one stayed at the other’s home. They both had keys to the other’s doors but officially, the maintained separate residences. Now, Liz was sometimes able to forget, for just a moment, that anything bad had ever torn them apart.

“No one important” she whispered to his sleepy form. “Go back to sleep” Liz coaxed, deciding she’d worry about the whole Tess and Kyle issue later. She’d fulfill her end of the deal. She would talk to Kyle but for now all she wanted to do was fall back to sleep, contented in the fact that the person she loved more than anything was lying right beside her.


~&~&~&~&~&


“Are you crazy?” Max questioned, though not meanly as he stood in the center of the studio, holding his guitar in one limp hand while staring at Liz in confusion. Inside the sound booth stood Jeremy, Tim and Paul, Liz’s new back-up band. The four were set to record the single which would hit radios in less than 24 hours… debuting a day after Echo was set to take the stage at the annual charity benefit Lonnie had booked them to perform at.

“I just got off the phone with Alex. He said that Isabel’s water broke and he rushed her off to the hospital” Liz explained, ignoring the interested faces of the three men watching and listening. “She could be in labor for hours and there’s no way he would leave her side. There’s no way I’d ask him to” she stated, jutting her chin out defiantly. “Then there’s Kyle who’s stuck in the middle of… somewhere or nowhere or wherever the hell it is he went to. He missed his plane because there was a huge accident on the road and he couldn’t make it to the airport in time” she informed, thinking her story almost sounded like a carefully calculated rouse. Liz shook it off though, acknowledging that her imagination couldn’t have come up with something so elaborate if she had tried.

“So perform with your new band” Max stated, gesturing towards the booth as all three waved in reply.

“You know studio politics better than anyone, Max” she rebutted, shooting him a pointed glare. “I can’t perform one of my new songs until its officially released and we don’t have time to teach them any of Echo’s music” Liz informed, looking more superior with each passing moment.

Groaning, Max turned back to the window standing between him and her band. “Out in the hall… all of you” he demanded with a hard look, making it apparent that he wasn’t joking. Eyes widening, the three young musicians pushed each other out the door in a hurry to do as requested. Liz barely stifled a laugh as one nearly tripped over the other. Max’s reputation as musician alone would have been enough to make anyone fulfill one of his requests but an order from the producer was always nonnegotiable. “Lay your cards on the table” he said to Liz once he was satisfied that they had some privacy.

“I already have” Liz defended, growing agitated by his unwillingness to see this wasn’t some game she was trying to play. “I’m short my bass player and my drummer. My new band, as great as they are, can’t possibly learn and perfect the song by tonight’s benefit… even if I could Jesse down here right now to work along with us. So what other choice do I have, short of cancelling which I refuse to do?” she demanded, dropping her irritation in favor of a pleading look.

“Do you realize how long it’s been since I performed?” Max questioned after a beat.

Without having to ask, Liz already knew the answer as well as the unspoken question in his voice. ‘Did she know how hard it would be to play on stage without Sean and the others backing him up?’ “Maybe in front of a big audience but you perform with me every day” she tenderly replied. “You know how good we are together. We can do this… you can do this. Will you please do this?” Liz asked and watched his eyes, finding the exact moment when he decided to give in to her.

“Fine” Max all but sighed and walked over to the nearest seat which happened to be the piano bench. “But we’ve already played ‘Broken’ at one of these and don’t have a lot of duets between us… at least not formal ones” he reminded, thinking of all the times she had just harmonized with him when they performed one of Livien’s songs or vice versa with Echo’s music.

“Actually, this year’s theme is this whimsical masquerade sort of part” Liz informed with amusement in her eyes. “It couldn’t be more perfect if I had chosen the theme myself because it means we can play our last duet” she said, meeting Max’s horrified gaze with her own twinkling expression.

“The last song I performed was ‘Bleed for Me’ and now you want me to get back on stage and sing ‘Come What May’?” he questioned, groaning when he saw the smile on Liz’s face grown in obvious amusement. “Parker… you can’t be… damn it, you are serious” he said, as though speaking out loud to himself. Liz watched with bated breath, knowing that he’d agree but wondering how much convincing it would take. “You really know I love you for agreeing to this” he finally added, moments later after he let the idea sink in a little.

“Great… so then I’ll get the guys back in here, we’ll start recording with Ethan while you take the old track into another studio and edit out the voices” she suggested with a smile that clearly stated all was right in her world.

Despite his nervousness and irritation, Max rolled his eyes and gestured for her to come closer. Teasingly, she took small steps towards him until she stood a few inches away from his seated body. With his hand curled along the end of her guitar strap, he gestured her down, closer to his face until their lips were a mere breath away. He watched as her eyes fluttered closed, preparing for the kiss she expected him to place against her lips. Instead, he shifted a fraction over and whispered, “I’m not wearing a tie” then pecked her cheek and stood up from the bench.

Max didn’t look back as he walked through the door, gesturing the band to go into the studio. If he had, he would have seen the frustrated look on Liz’s face as she tried to reign in the lust he had quickly spiked with close presence. “Alright boss” one of them, Jeremy said as he reached for his bass. “We ready to rock?” he asked, all three oblivious to the direction of their singer’s gaze as she decided to let Max get away with his game. At least he had agreed to sing again and that was really what mattered most.