Author: Kerri
Category: Mi/L even though it won’t appear so at first.
Rating: Come on…. this is me guys! Adult!!
Disclaimer: Yadah yadah…I don’t own…blah blah… but you bet ya ass I own Lena.
Feed back: Yes, please. This is my first Polar fic, so it would be appreciated. I'll only be updating once a month or so guys, so be patient ok!!
Banner: Jenny.
Summary: After Tess falls pregnant and the pod squad leave, the gang is left to pick up the pieces. How do they react when they come face to face with those who haunt their dreams after nearly eight years?
Authors note: Alex did ‘die’, and Tess and Max do bump uglies, and we go from there. Season 2 has all happened. The bar is based loosely on the movie coyote ugly. No infringement is intended. Just a note though…Max isn’t nice at all in this fiction ~ think end of season 2 Max…but worse. But I do promise you all this ~ he will redeem himself by the end.
For four very special woman ~ Nat, Lisa, Stacie and Ann. Thanks for kicking my ass when needed, and for being sounding boards, and for introducing me to the wide world of polar fiction. Four special women, who I count amongst my closest my friends. And to Jenny, for once more agreeing to be my beta…. we all know how twisted and scary my mind is, a place Jenny visits frequently. I haven’t killed her yet, but I’ve given her several heart failures along the way ~ you rock babe, above any other.
Prologue:
Vertigo:
The sensation of dizziness. An instance of such a sensation. A confused, disoriented state of mind.
A group meeting had been called, and they gathered together slowly in two separate groups. Kyle and Liz sat side by side, their heads close together as they spoke quietly over a problem Kyle was having in science class. They didn’t see the others approaching, and were blissfully unaware that their lives were about to be turned inside out as they talked. Liz explained the problem slowly, her head touching Kyle’s as he finally nodded in understanding.
“Thanks Liz…you’re a life saver,” Kyle murmured, snapping his book shut and removing his pencil from between his lips, where he had been chewing on it while Liz spoke.
They both winced at his choice of words, and Kyle picked Liz’s hand up and gave it a gentle squeeze. Turning her hand over, he laced his fingers through hers, a sign of friendship and support as she gave him a small smile. Sadness had dulled her eyes, Kyle knowing he and Maria would both give anything to see them sparkle once more.
“You ok Liz?” Kyle asked quietly, Liz shaking her head in response.
“No…not really Kyle.” She lowered her gaze and plucked at the grass with her free hand, her shinny hair swinging forward gently and hiding her from view, something she had become an expert of lately. Hide in plain sight…you can’t get hurt that way.
“Oh ohhh…I feel an ice cream moment coming on,” Maria whispered, shooting Kyle a look that spoke volumes. She had been sitting in front of them, watching her best friend closely.
That was the only warning Liz got, Kyle tackling her onto her back, and tickling her ribs as she started laughing helplessly. Maria laughed at Kyle’s expression as he gave Liz’s ribs a scrupulous working over, leaning back against her hands comfortably as Liz shrieked. It was the first time in day’s…weeks really, that Maria could remember feeling like this…since Alex…
It was a throat clearing that had them looking up, their laughter dying down when they saw the four aliens standing nearby. Isabel looked completely shell shocked. Michael looked as if he was ready to commit murder. Tess looked triumphant yet nervous, and Max…Max looked like he was going to be sick. Liz scrambled out from under Kyle, and smoothed her hair down as she sat up, guilt visible in her wary gaze.
“What is it?” Maria asked quietly, sensing that this meeting was going to get nasty. It was the way all of their meetings had ended lately.
Max glanced at Tess, and stepped closer to her side. The movement didn’t go unnoticed by anyone in the group, and Maria blindly groped for Liz’s hand.
“Ummm…things changed…the night of prom…” Max began haltingly.
“We get it Max” Kyle interrupted. “Both Liz and I saw you and Tess kissing. You’re together now…. So why the public announcement about it?”
Max blanched at Kyle’s statement, and Tess lowered her eyes.
“Its more than that” Max stammered, unable to lift his gaze. “We…we spent the night together…ummm…Tess’s pregnant.”
Max lifted his gaze then, and watched as Liz swallowed, hurt radiating from her every fibre as she deliberately turned her gaze from his. Max frowned slightly, but before he could open his mouth to remind Liz that she had slept with Kyle, and that they were no longer friends, Maria spoke up, her own eyes shooting angry sparks.
“Ok…so…Tess and you are gonna be parents…can we like…go now? Or we having a party to celebrate just how fucked up this is?”
Max shook his head as he glared at Maria for her heated outburst, and looked towards Michael and Isabel for support. Michael scowled at him, before spitting out the news none of them were prepared for, showing just how angry he was at the situation.
“The kid can’t survive here…we’re going home.”
Part 1.
“Alrighty Jamie…. ya’ll get home safely now ya hear?”
Liz looked up as the double doors shut with a thud, and she sat down with a soft groan. The sun was due to rise in an hour or so, sending it’s pale light spilling through the wide bay windows, and dust particles spinning. She massaged her aching temples lightly with her fingertips, and sent a half hearted glare in the direction of the source of her headache.
“Do me a favour Kyle…. hide that damn karaoke machine!”
Kyle started laughing, and nodded his head in agreement.
“That was just down right nasty last night…. I think if I’d heard one more rendition of Sweet Home Alabama, I would have gotten up and punched the Alabama right outta Jamie’s mouth!”
Liz started laughing at the thought of that image, and she collapsed weakly onto the barstool. It was when the music kicked in for at least the twentieth time that night that she turned around, a genuine smile breaking out over her face when she saw whom the culprit was. Kyle held his hand out to her, snorting with laughter as he sang the offending song of choice. It was the same occurrence every time they held a karaoke night. Jamie would hog the microphone, and this song would be all he sang. But now that the bar was empty save for staff, Liz didn’t mind the song. After all, it was almost her national anthem now.
Kyle grabbed her around the waist, and dipped her backwards over his arm, Liz snorting with laughter as he almost threw her upright, sending her hair swinging around her face in silken waves. He sighed softly as he drew her into his arms, Liz smiling as she rested her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes. Yeah…she was home.
“How’d ya’ll do tonight? Many guys grabbin at ya ass Lizzie girl? Or did grasshopper here frighten da horny bastards off?”
Liz opened her eyes and smiled slightly, her eyes trained on the woman who had spoken. Ava sat on the bar comfortably, leather clad legs stretched out, and a devilish smirk on her face as she twirled some of her hair around her finger, all the while chewing madly on a piece of gum. Ava wiggled her eyebrows suggestively, causing Kyle to groan out loud. Liz couldn’t help smiling, and gently withdrew from Kyle’s arms as she joined Ava at the bar.
“Nope…I stayed behind here tonight…you should know that Aves…it was you after all, shaking your butt on the counter, remember!”
Ava smirked again, and winked at Kyle as he started to clean up the stage area.
“True dat lady, but I also know that da guys here come for three things…and three things only…”
“Some damn fine entertainment, all da scotch they can handle, and to get a glimpse of my fine ass,” Liz finished dryly in a bad imitation of Ava’s thick accent, both girls starting to laugh as Ava clucked her tongue against her teeth.
“Ya know it baby! So when are ya gonna give ‘em some suga hey suga?”
Kyle grinned as he joined them. “Why would she Aves, when you’re up there every night, shakin what ya alien makers gave ya?”
Ava flipped Kyle the finger, and leant closer to him. “Suck on it Buddha Boy. Don’t ya’ll be envyin da booty…might lower ya status to an ant.”
Liz choked on her laughter, Ava snorting outright as Kyle glared at her.
“Just coz ya worship ya man’s booty rather than the divine teachings of Buddha doesn’t mean that karma won’t run full circle Ava!”
Ava raised one perfectly plucked eyebrow, and nodded slowly, her eyes sparkling with mischief as she slid a glance Liz’s way.
“Riigghtttt…. coz da bronze man’s gonna gimme an orgasm when I go to bed latah on right Kyle…uh huh…can ya hear me now Lizzie girl?”
Ava ran her hands up over her breasts, and tilted her head back as she let out a throaty moan, her eyes sliding shut as Liz hid her grin.
“Ohhhh…ohhhh…Ohhh Buddhhaaaa….”
Liz doubled over with laughter as Kyle snorted, stomped his foot, and stamped away, muttering under his breath about certain blonde alien chicks and their smart assed mouths as he went.
“Latah lova…ya’ll give Buddha a big smooch for me now” Ava called out after him, Liz gasping for breath as Kyle turned around and shot the blonde a filthy look, before continuing up the stairs to the private rooms above the bar.
Liz shook her head in wry amusement as Ava slid from her stool and under the bar, grabbing two shot glasses on her way. Liz sighed softly, watching as Ava poured them both a shot of single malt whiskey, and lit the top of both glasses with a lighter. Blue green flame flared brightly for a moment, before circling the rim of each glass lazily. Blowing the flames out, Ava slid a shot glass over to Liz, the two girls clinking glasses.
“To a damn good night,” Ava murmured.
“To karaoke,” Liz returned.
“Alli-oop,” Ava cracked, before both girls downed the shot.
Liz winced as the whiskey slid down her throat, warm and soothing the whole way. Life sure had turned out strange. If you had asked her ten years ago what she would have been doing at the age of twenty-five, she would have smiled and said, “Working in molecular biology, and having babies with Max Evans.” Well…that plan had shot out of the atmosphere eight years ago. Molecular biology had taken a back seat to having part ownership of a bar in the dirty south. Having babies was shelved, the replacement being the friendships she had formed. And Max…
Max Evan’s was a bad dream she had suffered from every night. Liz winced as she set her glass down with a solid thud on the polished oak surface of the bar. Her memories assaulted her, turning her eyes blind with tears as she remembered the callous way Max had treated her after Alex had died. His blatant refusal to listen to her pleas for understanding regarding the set up with Kyle. The names he had called her…hatred burning in his eyes. Yeah…life sure had turned out strange.
“Yo Lizzie girl…where ya at?”
Liz looked up at Ava, and had to blink as she stared into the face of the girl whom she hated with every fibre of her being, yet loved more than anyone else too. Two girls, both from the same dead queen…yet complete opposites in personalities. Love and friendship shone in Ava’s eyes…along with understanding. She knew where Liz had gone in her mind all right…and it called for desperate measures.
Picking up the whiskey bottle, she pushed the call button under the bar, signalling to Kyle that he was needed, and steered Liz into a seat at a table. Pouring them both another shot, Ava set the bottle down with a thud, and stared at Liz silently as they downed their shots. Liz’s eyes slid shut as the straight whiskey burnt her throat, and when she reopened them, Ava’s eyes had turned sad. Ava poured again, and then ran her finger over the rim of the glass, sending a pure sound echoing around them.
“Do ya remember when we first hooked back up girl?”
Liz nodded slowly, her eyes trained on the girl who had saved her and the human’s in more ways than one.
“I thought ya were gonna scratch my eyes right outta my head…I swear, I’ve nevah been so damn scared in my whole life as I was right then. Ya were lookin at me and Zan as if ya’d seen a ghost…starin at me with hatred, and at Zan with love and hope in ya eyes…then ya realised it was me, and I swear girl, I’ve never seen someone so broken as ya looked right then…ya remember?”
Liz nodded slowly, Ava indicating she should take her shot. The two girls touched glasses and drank, and Ava resumed her tale as she poured them another.
“It wasn’t all bed of roses after that though was it? I was fightin with Zan over da mind warp in regards to da truck, and he was tryin to explain himself…Maria was spirallin down a bad path, Kyle was shit scared of me, and you…you were forced to face ya worst nightmare when Zan and me finally got our shit together, and hooked back up…I honestly thought I’d lost da only friend I had when that happened.”
Liz sighed softly. “It just reminded me of…them. But then I realised that you…”
“…Wasn’t Tess. And Zan wasn’t Max. And that we wanted nothin from ya’ll, but friendship. And that’s all I wanted girl. So here we are…eight years on today…and ya still lookin at me like I’m her.”
Liz sighed heavily at Ava’s words, and lowered her gaze in shame. Ava was right…she and Zan had been a lifeline for the others…helping when first Liz’s, and then Kyle’s powers manifested. Helping them to not only control them, but to understand them. They had taken on Michael’s old apartment, and had basically hidden for the final year that the others had been in school, before the five of them had taken off the day after graduation…and none of them had been back to Roswell since.
Zan and Max might have looked the same, but they too were direct opposites in many ways. The punk look was the first clue. The second was the difference in powers. While Max had been the healer, Zan could only heal slight wounds. Nothing major. His main power was destruction…more along Michael’s powers than Max’s. And Ava could dream walk, not mind warp like Tess. She could change money and simple things…again… nothing major. It was Zan who could warp…
They could both drink, where as the others had gone completely haywire when they had even had a sip. And while they looked like the others on the surface…inside…again, polar opposites. Ava was gentle and kind, with a fun loving sense of humour. She and Kyle blatantly picked the shit out of each other, but at the end of the day, they had become friends. It had taken nearly three years, but friends they were. It was only Ava that Kyle could talk to about Tess, and she listened with a sympathetic ear, and shoulders strong enough to bear his burdens.
And Zan…Liz sighed. He was ice cold on the outside. The only people he let in were Ava, Kyle, Maria and Liz. Mistrust shone in his eyes and there was a hardness to him that Max had never had. It rang true, along with the scars from living on the streets. From almost dying at Lonnie and Rath’s hands. From having to heal the old fashioned way…from nearly losing Ava…but when he did let you in…you had a friend for life. One who would give anything and everything for you…without wanting anything in return.
Eight years had changed them all. Maria had left them though…she was married now, and living with Lucas in New York City. Her music career was solid, and she was finally happy. She had laid Michael’s ghost to rest after the fifth year anniversary. It had been hard for her to let Lucas in, but he had been patient with her, wearing down her walls slowly. Life was beautiful for her now, and the others wished her nothing but happiness.
Kyle…Liz smiled slightly. Kyle had been a man whore. He’d nailed anything female in those first few years, chasing tail and getting happy. But then he’d turned back to Buddha, and turned his life around. He had helped out with the bar, and had settled down. He and Zan had formed a solid friendship, and could be found most days, tinkering with cars or bikes, or discussing life in general. While Kyle had been uneasy around Max, with Zan he was finally at ease.
Liz sighed…she’d changed the most. Her mother had never forgiven her for giving up her dreams, and while that had shocked Liz, her father’s support had been the biggest shock of all. It had been him who had fronted the money she needed to buy into the bar. Her father who made the trip every year, to make sure she was ok. Her father, who had not turned from her when he discovered her biggest secret, and who had listened with a gentle smile, and an open heart.
Ava’s gentle voice tore Liz from her musings, Liz forcing herself to look Ava in the eye.
“Lookit Lizzie…we’re friends yeah?” Liz nodded; and let herself relax as Ava laid a gentle hand over hers.
“Then why have ya been wiggin on me for da past week or so? Ya lookin at me like I’m Tess again…like I’m gonna warp ya or somethin. Did I say somethin to upset ya’ll? Or is it somethin else?”
Liz took a deep breath, and squared her shoulders.
“Have you been dream walking me Ava?”
Ava reared back as if Liz had slapped her. Her eyes widened in distress, and her face paled as she stared at Liz in shock.
“God no!!! I’d never do that to you Liz! How could ya even think…god.”
Liz bit her lower lip as she reached out and covered Ava’s hand with her own. She hadn’t meant to upset her friend, but she’d had to ask all the same.
“I’m sorry Aves…really I am. It’s just…since I changed, I can tell when someone’s using their powers…. you know this. And for the last few weeks I’ve felt this…presence…I wasn’t sure if it was you or not. I had to ask…I’m really sorry Ava. I know you’d never hurt me…you or Zan.”
Ava reached blindly for the bottle, and took a deep swig, not bothering with niceties such as using a glass. When she sat the bottle back down, she reopened her eyes, and stared straight at Liz.
“Where…when…how often…and what da hell are they doin in ya dreams? What are you doin in ya dreams?”
Liz sighed again, and spoke quietly. “It started three weeks ago…. just a faint brush of my mind. They don’t do anything, they just watch. I’m always dreaming about this place, and the bills we pay, and everyday shit. You taught me to keep myself closed off, so I do, even in sleep. Kyle’s the same. After that first brush, it happened a few days later, and then a few days after that.”
Liz grabbed the bottle, and took a mouthful herself, needing to settle her nerves now that it was out in the open.
“Not last time, but the time before, I caught sight of someone. My dream plane was like a thick bubble, and this…person…was standing on the outer edge watching me do the books. It’s hands were pressed against the bubble’s membrane, and I could…. feel them Aves. They were so sad…so lonely. The guilt they felt…and the shame. That’s why I thought it was you.”
“So you ain’t pickin up on no malice then…just these feelin’s. What else?”
Liz looked towards the stairs, and spoke softly. “The presence is getting stronger…it’s female. She wears her pain like a cloak, because she isn’t aware that I can pick up on her feelings in there. But then last night…someone else joined her in the dream world. It was male. All he could feel was anger and pain and doubt. Fear. He just stood behind her and watched. They’re both strong, but he’s definitely the stronger of the two.”
“Like me and Zan?”
“Yeah.” Liz looked up then, and looked straight at Ava. “I really am sorry Ava. But I had to ask. The only two aliens I know live with me…I just had to be sure.”
“Had to be sure of what?” a new voice asked.
Liz looked up and smiled slightly as Kyle settled down onto the bar stool between her and Ava, nudging Ava’s shoulder gently with his own to let her know his act before had just been a joke too.
“Someone’s been dream walkin Lizzie girl here…she asked if it was me or Zan, which it ain’t…”
The threesome fell silent at that, staring at each other uneasily. It was Kyle who broke the silence as he reached for the half empty bottle. Taking a mouthful, he set the bottle back down and spoke softly.
“Isabel could dream walk.”
“Isabel’s on Antar…she’s probably dead Kyle. They probably all are” Liz said quietly.
“Like we’re supposed to be a dead?” a wry voice asked softly.
Liz spun on her stool, a warm smile breaking out over her face as she stared at the door. Zan winked at her, his cocky attitude in full-blown smart-ass mode as he blew Ava a kiss. Liz could only stare at him for a moment, her heart constricting slightly. No…Max would never measure up to the man before her now. It wasn’t the attitude, or the tatts, or the wildly scruffy look…it was the heart of him. And the fact he had risked his life to save the man standing at his side.
Turning slightly, Zan took the hand of the man beside him, and tucked it into the crook of his elbow. When he squeezed slightly, Zan crossed the room slowly. This was their biggest secret, and one that none of them had trouble keeping. The only people outside of the group at the bar who knew were Maria and Lucas, Jim and Jeff. It was also the reason why they had left Roswell so quickly, and why none of them had been back since.
Reaching out, Liz took the man’s hand, and led him to his seat, as Zan grabbed Ava’s hair in a playful handful, and tugged her head back for a kiss. Kyle and Liz watched as the blind man set his cane by the table, and removed his wire-rimmed glasses. Bright green eyes stared blindly across the room, but his voice was warm and tinged with amusement.
“Liz Parker…have you been keeping secrets again? Is that anyway to treat the surviving members of the Scooby gang?”
Liz heard and felt the slight admonishment behind his words, and reaching out, took his hand in her own. Lacing their fingers together, Liz felt her burden lift, and smiled as she stared into his unseeing eyes. Blind or not, at least he was still here…still with her.
“No Alex…you’re the only secret I have left.”
This will be it for me until my baby is born, so enjoy for now, and thanks again for your continual support and I'm glad you are all enjoying it