Delicate (XO,SN,UC,Mature) COMPLETE

[vaifeal]

A/N: Things are crazy hectic right now (I'm moving... again) which is why I haven't been around. I'll try to get the next part up on Saturday because Sunday isn't an option, but if I can't then the next part won't be until the 21st. Sorry about this. I'll get back into the groove soon.

“Every now and then I get like this
And it isn't hard to see
But the old man in the kitchen
I think he's part of me”
- All At Once, Pete Yorn

Dean had only ever been in New York City once. It had been when they were younger, their dad had found a hunt there and they'd gone. It'd turned out that the few hunters living in the city didn't like outsiders coming in to do their job. They'd never returned not even to drive through it.

But since Jess had asked Sam to pick up the rest of her stuff from her apartment while she moved into her new place with a very odd woman with an unrivaled love of the word 'fantastic', he got to play delivery boy.

The only positive of the trip was that if he was lucky Liz would be there, had not gone off somewhere like he'd been told she tended to do, and just maybe they'd actually be able to hold a polite conversation. Last thing he needed was yet another woman giving him the evil eye and tripping him up because she could. Though considering how they kept leaving things, it didn't look good.

An extra three hours of traffic later they'd pulled off of Broadway and found the sidestreet where there hadn't been any parking which had added another half hour to the trip, Dean finally stood in front of the building that Jess had provided the address for.

It was the only brownstone on the block instead surrounded by plain brick apartment buildings that looked like public housing. The street was quiet except for the music coming from the black gate beside the house, their backyard. Ignoring Sam as he walked to the front door, he went to the gate and pushed it open.

Immediately greeted by a swell of people and balloons, Dean took a minute to observe. There was a barbecue going, food stacked on a table, two large coolers which he'd guess were separated into alcoholic and non-alcoholic since there were some children running around. It was a completely normal end of summer gathering.

He caught sight of Liz as she moved through the crowd. She looked happy, really happy. He didn't have any right to get in the way of that.

She made a silly face that had him raising an eyebrow before she stretched out her arms and picked up a small girl who wasn't even a toddler with head of dark hair and a wide smile, “Mama.”

*

The first thing Sam saw when he entered the backyard, besides his brother frozen with an expression that could only be described as fear, was Liz dancing with a little kid that if he had to guess he'd say was no more than a year old. They were both laughing joyfully and a couple of people around them were smiling in her direction indulgently.

She always did have an innocent way of attracting attention.

Annoyance flitted through him at her complete unawareness. That was Liz. Rush into things headfirst, mess things around until there was no up or down and right or wrong, and then forcibly remove herself from what she'd done regardless of the consequences, always with a smile on her face.

Liz didn't stay around to clean up her messes.

When Jess had been clear headed enough to appreciate what had been done in her name, Liz had been with them with leaving only the occasional phone call to explain. When Sam had come through and the truth had come out, Liz hadn't been there. She'd even gone so far as to disconnect her number and ask Jess not to give the new one to them. And when he'd taken Jess to her parents to weave some bullshit story about witness protection – Liz's story – the creator hadn't been there.

Jess didn't want to hear what he thought about her friend, his friend who had told more lies than truths, any problems she had had with Liz she'd made peace with and Sam didn't want to disrupt the delicate relationship that they'd established while they rediscovered each other.

Dean wasn't much of a help either. He looked over at his brother who was still staring at Liz. Maybe there had been more between them he had figured. They'd flirted and he was fairly certain that they'd fucked everytime he'd left them alone but in some regards both of them were private enough that deeper attachment was hard to read.

The song finally came to an end and the pair stopped jumping around, the tiny head leaning against Liz's shoulder. Brown eyes finally registered that they were there and a hardness came over her face that Sam hadn't seen in the time that he had known her.

She ignored his presence instead focusing on Dean who hadn't looked away from the kid, “Oh, take your head out of your a-rear end. She's not even the right age.”

His brother let out a strangled noise that kind of sounded like, “Yeah.”

With a role of her eyes Liz pointed at Dean, “Who's that Mickey?”

“Mama,” the little girl – Mickey – replied her hands clapping enthusiastically.

“And who's that,” the finger moved to him.

“Mama.”

“Exactly,” having had her point proven she turned away dismissing them and weaved her way into the crowd.

*

“Charlie,” it was half surprise and half greeting.

She ignored it to tighten her grip on his arm. Sam had never been her favorite person. A bit too whiny for her tastes. The people she favored took action. Grabbed life with both hands rather than let it pass them by. He had always been too content to sit back. Except apparently when he wanted a word with Liz who he'd been trying to pull aside since she'd given him the brush off.

He wanted to yell at her.

Stupid ass.

His brother seemed to have more sense. Dean had grabbed a drink – non alcoholic surprisingly – and a burger before finding a piece of wall to lean against. He'd followed Liz with his eyes the whole time but at least he didn't follow her like a kicked dog. Smart man.

Besides he clearly didn't like most of the music playing. She enjoyed that.

“Do you wanna know something I learned a long time ago?” Sam gave her his confused hurt puppy look. Jess had always called it cute. Charlie thought that it made him look like a constipated stupid ass, “In the end people always get what they deserve.”

She released him and walked away without looking back.

*

Serena watched Dean leave the yard to move his car and Liz move toward the garage to make room for it. They kept a lot of shit in there that didn't belong. At some point they'd have to get around to cleaning it out.

Dean was almost exactly what she had expected.

Attractive and scruffy, had an easy smile and deep eyes, and was clearly as crazy about Liz as Liz was about him. Too bad nothing would come of it. Not at the moment. Neither of them would make a move. They were both too unsure, too hurt to put themselves out there.

Maybe she could help.

She saw her sister come to stand next to her, tanned features following the same pair. “He really loves that car, doesn't he?”

Biting back a laugh, Serena didn't try to tell her not to do whatever was going through her head. It'd be a futile and empty gesture. While she wasn't quite ready to take action against the Winchester's, Charlie obvious was.

And when Charlie wanted to do something, she did it.

*

It was harder to ignore the way her stomach was flipping over itself than she'd anticipated.

But then all she'd had to gage what her reaction might have been to his presence was a picture in her head and that was not nearly as effective as him standing in front of him. Liz just wanted to lean forward into his warmth, to forget the things that had gone wrong.

If she could erase anything it'd be that.

Wincing slightly at the awkward conversation that they were trying to keep going, Liz shook her head and took a deep breath trying to clear her head. Dean always had fogged things up, “What do you want from me?”

He didn't respond for a minute. She didn't know if it was the sudden change in topic or if he didn't want to hurt her by saying it or if it wasn't a question that he'd thought about since they'd stopped being them, “I don't know.”

That was a lie. She could read it in the way he looked away from her, his head tilting toward the noise of the dying party. He scratched the back of his neck and shoved his hands into his pockets and Liz knew. It was the same reason that she'd been given in the past. Always the same reason.

Why did everyone assume that she wanted normal?

She dropped her head resigned. He couldn't say it. That he wanted her. That he wanted to work it out. Not him. Pushing past the exhaustion threatening to overwhelm her, Liz turned back to her apartment. She needed a nap.

“Great, that's just fucking great.”

[vaifeal]

Did you know that it's Thursday? I didn't know it was Thursday.

“So if you walk away
Who is gonna stay
Cause I'd like to think the world is a better place”
- Have You Ever, The Offspring

When she went upstairs to her apartment to hide, Liz hadn't expected Sam to be there silently fuming. She knew that eventually that he'd find her and make her talk but she'd foolishly hoped that it wouldn't be on that day or that he'd accept what she'd done without a her there to be his personal verbal punching bag. Hell, he sorta lived with Jess and Dani that had to lend something to her case.

The way he was looking... glaring at her she'd have to say that it was too soon for that.

With a resigned sigh she closed the door behind her, walked past the boxes of Jess's belongings, and into the living room/study. The windows opened up on the front of the house so the sounds wouldn't drift into the backyard. There wasn't any need to get anyone else involved.

“Do we have to do this?” she moved away from him, as far as she could. “I'm not going to apologize for what I did.”

He wouldn't hit her. Would do nothing but verbally assault her. Liz would have preferred it the other way. Physical damage faded, at most, in a few weeks. Mental bruises, if they subsided, took years. Sam wouldn't raise his fist but he'd already done more damage than any demon had.

Those Winchester's were dangerous.

“You lied to me.”

“I failed to tell you the truth. I didn't lie,” his jaw clenched and she could tell that he didn't appreciate her splitting hairs. Unable to stop herself the bait passed her lips, “Maybe if you'd asked the right questions.”

Sam took a deep breath, his glare still challenging, “You let me believe Jess was dead.”

“I did what I had to.”

“Have you ever said anything that wasn't complete bullshit?”

*

After a half hour during which Liz hadn't returned to the party, Serena went to find her. Instead she found Dean watching the few remaining people as they pulled chairs together and settled in for hours that they'd spend drinking and joking. Under normal circumstances the three of them would be some of the louder participants. As it was the only one there was Charlie.

“So you're Dean Winchester,” she held out a soda for him to take which he did with a half smile.

“That's what they tell me.”

She sat next to him with a nod, “From what I heard I thought you'd be hamming it up with my cousins.”

“They're are hot but...”

“But there not the ones you want,” he gave her a dark look but didn't respond. “Liz has that effect on people.”

“Hmm,” he hummed noncommittally, careful not to give anything away which gave everything away.

“You gonna grow a pair and tell her?”

Put on the defensive his shoulders stiffened, “Who the hell are you?”

“Your fairy fucking godmother,” Serena slapped his thigh and stood up. “Now lets go find where your charming mistress Houdini-ed to.”

*

“Who gave you the right?” Liz took a shaking breath in as Sam ended his tirade.

He'd been going for what seemed like a half hour but it could have been more or less. She hadn't known he could be like that. Sure, when she'd talked to Serena in that hospital two years ago she'd known that she was jeopardizing their relationship but he'd been like a brother to her. She just needed him to have a little faith in her.

A little yelling and a little forgiveness.

She'd lied but so had he. It was the lives they led. He didn't believe her though. Not that it'd been to protect Jess. Not that she knew someone that didn't have ties to demons and could heal. And he certainly didn't believe that aliens were real and that she was sorta one of them.

It hurt. Like someone had cut her open, pulled her innards out, and poured salt on the whole mess.

“I-”

“WHO GAVE YOU THE RIGHT?” she winced away from his voice.

It wasn't fair. That wasn't fair but she couldn't find the words to tell him that.

“I did,” Serena's voice snapped through the room, her work mask down making her look terrifying. Her heart jumped into her throat as Dean stepped up behind her friend, his heated gaze directed at his brother.

“I should've known.”

Serena clicked her tongue and took a step into the room, “Careful there Sam. I'll think your ungrateful.”

“Who the fuck-” Liz darted forward and grabbed his arm to keep him from advancing on Serena. Her friend didn't pull her punches. Never had. She didn't need them to start on each other.

“You don't want to get in her way Sam. This isn't Stanford. Things aren't the same here,” he had to understand that. If either Pinto really wanted it, the Winchester's wouldn't make it out of the city alive.

As it was Charlie was a hair away from calling in their warrant.

“Either take your head out of your ass or go paddle your bullshit elsewhere.”

*

“What the hell is wrong with you?” Dean fought to keep his voice level as he slammed the door behind them. The sounds of the highway and the occasional plane only slightly muffled.

Sam pressed the icepack to his cheek. Liz's friend had a hell of a left hook, “We're not talking about this.”

“Jess is alive because of her. I'm alive because of her.”

“Dean-”

“This is crap Sam. She's done nothing but help us, why the hell did you go off on her like that?”

“She lied to me.”

“You lied to her too,” he ran his hand through his hair frustrated. He didn't get why his brother was being such a thick bastard. That was usually his role.

“This isn't any of your business.”

“Bullshit,” he shoved Sam into the wall, the plaster cracking slightly at the force. “Why Sam? What the hell did she do for you to treat her like she's worse than a demon?”

“She saved Jess,” the response wasn't one he'd expected and by his expression Sam hadn't either.

“What?”

“She saved Jess and I couldn't. I was the problem. I'm always the problem. Mom died because of me. The demon kept coming after us because of me. Demons still come after us because of these abilities I'm supposed to have.”

“That's bullshit and Liz doesn't have anything to do with that.”

“How can I be ok with her trying to make everything good for me when I'm more dangerous for them than anything we've faced and she knows that?”

*

At three o'clock in the morning when her head felt like it had just hit the pillow – even though she'd been asleep for a good two hours – some mad ass started banging on the door. Still slightly drunk and definitely not awake, Charlie grabbed the baseball bat beside her bed and used it to help her stumble down the stairs.

When she saw that it was Dean on the otherside. That just made it all the more pertinent to use the bat for more than just a cane.

“You fucking douchebag,” she yelled as she wrenched the door open. “You really are a thick fuck.”

“Is Liz here.”

“Given the hour I'd say yeah,” she could see the Impala parked directly ahead and she moved to shove past him but a small body collided with her sending them both into the doorframe.

“Charlie don't,” Liz's slight finger pulled at the bat.

Her friend really was much more forgiving than she was.

“Why not?” Liz dropped her hand. “Is he going to fix what he broke?” a slight subtle wince. “Then why can't I return the favor?”

“Please...”

Letting the bat drop to the floor, Charlie turned to Dean. He was nothing special but Liz didn't need her to say that, “Don't make the mistake of thinking you're welcome here. You and your cunt brother can stay the fuck away from my property and get out of my fuckin' city.”

*

“What are you doing here Dean?” he rubbed his neck with his hand eyes darting from her to the door and back.

Liz wrapped her arms around herself protectively. It was three in the morning and she was finally starting to get tired and having him there was only going to make her insomnia worse. If she closed the door on him then she'd just keep asking herself if she'd just lost him for good. If she stayed then chances were he was just going to break her heart again.

“I wanted to tell you that I talked to Sam. He'll apologize soon.”

“You shouldn't have done that.”

“Why not?”

“It was between him and me.”

“He shouldn't have done that to you.”

"Taking care of me isn't your responsibility."

"Yes-"

“I stopped being your concern the moment you walked out of Bobby's,” they stared at each other for a moment. She didn't want to fight. They'd fought enough. “Why are you really here?”

Dean ran through his arsenal of awkward tells making him look like a little boy who had to tell his parents that he'd 'accidentally' blown up the neighbors mailbox, “I'm no good at this.”

“I don't-”

Let him say it. He had to say it. She needed him to say it.

“Just let me get this out. I-” he cleared his throat and avoided eye contact. “I shouldn't have left you at Bobby's. I didn't want to and it was wrong. I'm sorry,” she tried to work her mouth but her voice was caught. He must have taken it as she wasn't accepting it because he started to walk away. “I'm gonna go.”

He walked down the stairs toward the Impala, light flannel overshirt wrinkled from a long day, hair sticking up in all directions, keys already in his hand. He was doing it again, walking away. She wouldn't let him. Not this time.

“Dean,” he paused enough to let her catch up. “I-Don't be a stranger.”

“I'll call,” he gave a slight nod and started to turn again.

Not bothering to halt her instinct Liz launched herself at him, his surprised arms catching her easily and holding her tightly. He gave great hugs. Warmth threading through her voice, she nuzzled into his neck, “You are such an ass.”

But he was her ass.

[vaifeal]

“Day by day I work myself down to the bone.
And I put your arms around me whenever I’m alone.
And sure, I know that those arms, they aren’t real,
But I say that anything is better than the way I feel.”
- Just Perfect, Ryan Montbleau

For several months everything was as close to perfect as it had been since she'd been eight and her parents had taken her to Disneyland.

Sam had apologized – a tense awkward affair that made both of them reexamine the way they'd been acting – and Jess was happily playing house in Colorado, utilizing the stubbornness that she'd inherited from her friends with a new old engagement ring to show for it. Dani was neck deep in her studies which made her slightly more loopy than average but other than that she was doing well.

Serena had just gotten back from Crete with Ryan, their spur of the moment elopement that they hadn't told anyone they'd been doing until it was done. Granted neither of them had known they were going to do it until ten minutes before they'd left for the airport but Liz – and everyone else – would have liked more notice than a voicemail after having gone missing for two days.

And Charlie. Well, Charlie was Charlie. She'd gotten fired. For punching her boss. After he'd pinched her ass. They'd settled out of court so that both of them could avoid jail time. Instead of getting a job at another station, she'd gotten a job with Major League Baseball. She didn't like baseball but loved her new job. Go figure.

Even as the days and weeks had passed Liz had waited for the other shoe to drop. For the delicate hesitance to give way to disaster. For the peace that the people around her were finding to collapse.

It was stupid and Dean had called her on it more than once during their hours long telephone conversations that more often than not ended up with them falling asleep on the phone. She'd never understood why people did that. What was the point of making the call if they were just going to sleep? Now she was that person.

Her cellphone bill was a bit higher than it used to be.

But Dean would make comments on her behavior. Little things about living in the present and not worrying about things until they happened. She didn't have to be prepared for every little thing. Quiet didn't always have to be the calm before the storm.

Though, in her experience it did.

So she went on. Going to work, which was suddenly more predictable since she'd moved into forensics and out of the field, hunting occasionally though not much, and talking to Dean whenever their schedules fell at a time where they both free. They had a nonconformist relationship.

She missed the sex.

He missed it too. She could tell by the way his voice would take on a choked quality when she'd make a seemingly innocent innuendo: if there was such a thing. Liz had never had a dazzling active sex life. She couldn't imagine what the dry spell was like for a man who, quite simply, had been a slut in the purest sense of the word.

To be honest, she was one dirty dream away from blatantly propositioning him and she couldn't think of one person who would begrudge her that.

*

Liz had learned a long time ago that in her life, bad things didn't just happen. Catastrophes happened.

It started with a frantic call from Sam. Jess had accidentally melted her coffee cup, his alarm clock, their door nob, and one of Dani's textbooks. Along with a plethora of other minor objects. She had ended up on the wrong side of the odds and she needed help. None of them could afford to leave her with that kind of power and no training. It would bring all kinds of attention down on them.

If suspicion was cast on Jess it would lead people to Liz. If eyes were turned toward Liz it would bring attention to the others. And if it was suddenly made widely known that Jess was alive then the FBI would have several new points of interest to find the Winchester's by.

It was a completely shit situation.

Numerous conversations later, Liz had finally laid down in bed ready to pass out comfortable in the knowledge that she had a very busy couple of weeks ahead of her. Then, just as her head had hit the pillow, her phone had rung. Again.

Ava.

With a message from Larek. Kivar had lost control of the planet. He was on his way to get his revenge.

*

“This thing with Jess, is it going to happen to me?”

The highway static crackled around her, weaving in and out of their conversation but that's what happened when both parties were at rest stops. Liz in Oklahoma. Dean in Colorado. She didn't want to have this talk on the phone, there was just too much to it, but they both knew that as soon as they crossed into the Roswell city limits it'd be too busy to do more than blink.

“I don't know.”

“So it doesn't always...”

“Nope,” she couldn't tell by his tone if he was distressed by the possibility. She needed to see him. “Max didn't come with an instruction booklet. We all kind of learn this stuff along the way.”

“That makes it more interesting.”

“You have no idea.”

*

Dean arrived in Roswell before she did and that kinda scared her. There had been no way of telling what the general reaction to him would be. The lot of them tended to be less overprotective of her then Charlie and Serena but they could be a bit extreme as well.

That's why when Liz found them all out by the pod chamber talking genially – though the atmosphere was more one of a new found common ground – she was inordinately relieved.

Of course she'd greeted them all in turn (leaving Dean for last so she could do it properly and in private). Most of them were easy. Sam had been a bit awkward since it'd been the first time they'd seen each other since his apology but Jess had playfully shoved them closer and Liz had felt the tension drop away. He was trying, that was all she needed.

When she'd gone to say hello to Ava, the petite blond managed to trip over her own feet and in a perfect display of spastic precision land in front of Dean. The newly initiated abyss member had leaned down, smirk firmly in place to help her up.

“You alright down there half-pint?”

Ava glared up at him with all her worth but took the offered hand, “Impressive, the ape managed string together six words.”

For a minute, there was a tense silence before Dean broke it with a sharp laugh.

“I like her.”

*

There were a couple of things that Ava was very good at.

She ALWAYS knew when her son was lying, could disappear into a crowd faster than the best double agent, had mindwarping down to a science, make Max become puddy in her hand, kill Skins with a practiced ease, protect her family with all she was worth, and she had one hell of a sixth sense.

A survival tool, forged through years of living on the streets, it was one of the few things she was grateful her past had given her.

Two nights after Liz had come home, Ava knew hours after her sister had disappeared with Dean that there was something off. No matter how horny Liz was she wouldn't just go AWOL like that. Knowing more than to question his wifes intuition, Max had grabbed Michael and gone out to look for the pair.

They'd found Dean in the park a large welt on the back of his head, “He was hit by some sort of blunt object.”

Ava turned to Kyle and blinked, “He IS a blunt object.”

Despite her attempt at levity they all knew what it was. A message. Kivar had arrived.

And he had Liz.

[vaifeal]

“Sometimes the white coats; They hide black hearts.
We've learned to sugar coat the same black guards.
Well, I turn lead into gold
I'll cure original sin.
Oh, now that I've tasted blood,
Now this wine seems too thin.”
- Blood and Wine, Dustin Kensrue

Jess was trying not to show that her hands were shaking. Isabel could tell anyway.

She felt sorry for the girl. None of this had anything to do with her. She was just another person to be caught in the storm that was their life. Because of Max. It always came down to her brother. Isabel understood that most times he was doing what he felt was right. Or what someone had asked him to do. Or what any of them would have done if they'd had his ability.

But he never thought things through.

Especially when it came to Liz. They weren't together anymore. Both of them were happy in separate relationships but he still had a damning blank spot where she was concerned. Despite that Ava had turned out to be his best half and Dean was, with all his faults - because of his faults, what Liz wanted.

There wasn't any wrong with the way they acted around each other but she needed Max to be more careful when he was helping Liz. He jumped in and did what was asked. Which left this poor woman struggling to deal with the consequences.

Sure Jess would never be as powerful as Liz and definitely wouldn't be able to match any of the royal five, there was no need for her to even have gifts. Her having abilities meant that Max had been sloppy. It wasn't necessary and resulted in the blonds life never being the same.

Their type of life took everything they had to give.

All they had to do was look at Liz to see the proof. The only reason that Kivar had taken her was because of them. Because of Max. He hadn't had any control when he'd brought her back from the brink of death. She was the strongest of the changed humans. On top of that, for a long time she'd been the kings' chosen mate.

Liz had Max's mark on her. Less so than Ava but it was still there nonetheless.

There was no normal after that.

*

“I thought no one could get into her head,” Dean winced as the door slammed shut again.

The house was in an uproar. Bags were being tossed, valuables collected, people double checking that there was no traces left behind for others to follow. They had done it all before but he didn't see the necessity to do it at the moment. Liz wouldn't give up their location, no matter what they did to her.

“Kivar isn't just anyone,” Ava moved the icepack to check the welt on the back of his head. He didn't want Max to heal it. “He'll break her mind for the pleasure of it.”

“Then what the hell are we doing,” he shoved past her, ignoring the way his skull burned.

They couldn't just leave Liz with that alien. They knew what it was going to do to her but they were packing. Ava was protesting behind him, something about making sure that certain parties were safe. He couldn't do that.

“Sam. Sammy,” his brother skidded into the room relief evident on his face. “We're leaving.”

*

The gruff one was standing behind him, silent and domineering. Michael was a joke waiting to happen. Especially when he was around Maria but Dean didn't give a shit about that. He needed to get Liz away from the prick who had her.

Everyone else was busy moving anyone with ties to them to safety. Guerin and him were going to get her back.

It didn't matter that they were going into it blind or that he didn't have any effective way to defend himself, he wasn't going to leave her at it's mercy for who knew how long until the rest of them were ready. Their priorities might've made sense for them but the Winchester's didn't work like that.

No one got left behind.

Their dad had learned that in the Marines. They'd learned it from him. He'd made sure his boys would do the right thing. Make the hard decisions. Take care of each other.

Silently watching Sam exchange goodbyes and good lucks with his fiance, Dean called him over.

“I want you to go to leave with Jess.”

“What? No.”

“There's no point in us both going. You can help more with them,” Sam glared at him darkly just as he'd known he would.

“She's my friend too. I'm going.”

“I'm not going to be able to focus if I have to worry about you and you'll be worrying about Jess. Go protect the spawn,” he tried to offer a smile but it felt brittle.

“Dean-”

“I can't leave her out there Sam, I got to get her back.”

His brother looked towards Jess for a moment as if reminding himself of how far he'd go for her, “Okay.”

*

He hadn't moved.

Michael hadn't been sure of Liz's latest boyfriend, preferring to reserve judgment – even after Ava had given his approval and he'd offered his assistance in the coming battle without question. Concern for the woman who'd become closer to him than he'd ever thought possible, years of experience in which he'd been burned too many times. Both kept him from accepting the cocky man.

The way he'd been with Liz, quiet open affection, had played in his favor. Dean had almost gotten his respect with the way he'd deflected questions away from them then in the way he'd refused to put off going to retrieve her. Michael had even found himself reluctantly liking the man. His opinion of him, however, was cemented once they'd rescued Liz from an obviously half-assed prison.

He hadn't moved.

They'd went in, got her out and to a safe house, and Dean hadn't moved from her side. Liz stared blankly out, beyond them. She was catatonic but Dean didn't move.

*

The idea had been doomed to failure the moment the seeds of it had planted themselves.

Though against all odds it had worked.

But as screams of raw agony bounced around the room, Ava just wasn't sure if it had been the right things to do. Liz had hidden away in a dark corner of her mind, a fragment, in the hope that Kivar wouldn't be able to find her and rip her to shreds. A small part of her untouched and protected.

They'd pulled her out. Exposed her to what she was trying to hide from. Liz's mind was fractured, perhaps beyond repair, and Ava had shoved her into that. There were no more shields, no more dark corners, nothing that the average person used to protect their minds. Just chaos. Each memory pushing itself to the forefront. The damage removing any ability to block stimuli.

Liz was completely open, no one was meant to be that way.

And she'd done it to her.

*

There were a handful of moments in Dean's life for which he could say that he'd been truly terrified.

Most of them where from when he'd been younger but he could say with certainty that he could add seeing Liz writhing in pain with no inkling on how to make it stop to the list. He'd laid down in the bed next to, pulling flush against him, just to make himself feel like he was helping.

No one had been more surprised than him when – even though she hadn't moved – her cries lessened to whimpers and sobs. Max had tried to heal her. Isabel had tried to guide her. Ava and Tess had tried to build back her walls. Michael had stood a silent guard over her.

But it was Dean who made her calm.

She might have just tired herself out but he thought it was more than that. It was as scary as it was empowering. On some level Liz knew he was there and she wanted him to stay. She trusted him to keep her safe, to be with her when she was at her lowest.

The woman who kept everyone at arms length was clutching at him like a life line. He pulled her close watching her features as she dropped into a fitful slumber. He was about ready to follow when all hell broke loose.

Kivar had brought the battle to them.

*

She felt like her head was being held under water or had a plastic bag over it. Any notion of safety was gone and there was just asphyxiation and pain. There was no sense of direction. Up was down. Right was left. Dark was light.

Then there had been Dean.

Liz had known it was him. His person was made of little details she'd spent months memorizing because she could. The scar on his right thumb that interrupted the callous there. The silky patch of skin of the inside of his wrist. The way his second toe was bigger than his big toe. That his eyelashes tickled more than the light growth of facial hair he always had.

The unique beat of his heart.

That his fingers were usually cooler than the rest of him.

How his bottom lip felt like a little pillow when it pressed into her forehead.

Shirts soft with years of use. Jeans that had little rips in them because he could be as much of a klutz as she could be and because him and trouble were like a moth and flames.

He'd been there. A fixed point that she could use to navigate the storm around her. She'd used his presence until it had suddenly disappeared leaving her to blink her way into consciousness by herself, trusting the knowledge that Dean wouldn't have left her.

He was stubborn like that.

*

One minute Dean had been bracing himself for the inevitable and the next he'd had to rush forward to catch Liz as she slipped down the wall, a small relieved smile on her face. She grabbed him as tightly as her weakened arms had been capable and he'd squeezed her back.

The fighting continued around them but it didn't matter. Not then.

[vaifeal]

“Life falls down on me
Cuts into my soul
But I know I got the strength
To make it through it all
Cause I'm still standing tall
Breaking through these walls
I'm gonna give my all”
- Jamia Simone Nash And Impact Repertory Theater

There was a certain feelings when a chapter drew to an end. Excited expectation that the next part would be what the promise that had threaded through. Dread that the climax hadn't been reached despite what it may have seemed. Exhaustion that it wasn't just over yet.

Liz drew her finger over Dean's steadily rising and falling chest.

She was going for a fourth option: accepting happiness. She wasn't going to question what might happen later or aggravate the little loose ends that followed them around. The here and now, that's what she was going to pay attention to.

They'd done the alien thing. Had done the supernatural thing. The peace thing was worth a shot. At least temporarily. Dean would always have his eye caught by some demonic or otherworldly clue and she'd always go with him.

Screw the degree, the steady job, and the 'security' that the average person searched for. At some point in her life she'd had all three, there would be a time in the future that she'd probably have some semblance of that again, but she'd done life with out it and had been fine.

It wasn't what she needed.

Dean shifted, his hand coming up to rub at his face, “Why're you still awake?”

The last time she'd gone on without what she needed, she fell apart. Become a complete fucking mess. It wasn't something she was in any rush to experience again. Given that it was avoidable she couldn't see herself walking away from this.

“Not tired,” he smiled at her and rolled them so that he was half on top of her.

“We're gonna have to fix that.”

*

Dean wasn't actually sure when he'd become domesticated.

It had to have come on gradually for him not to have noticed it. He looked at the grocery bags in his arms. Grocery bags. With real food in them. Including vegetables. There was nothing in there to be deep fried, microwaved, vacuum sealed with an expiration date so far in the future his unborn children would be old, and nothing generally thought to be able to survive a nuclear holocaust.

Which meant that Liz hadn't let him buy any of the things he usually ate.

Sure he liked the food that she'd make for them whenever they had the opportunity to skip out on the dives they usually got food from and she usually made simple meals that he would like but that wasn't the point.

She'd taken him Grocery Shopping. Made him push the cart as she filled it with ingredients he'd never used before. They'd made small talk with the other people at the register. There was now reusable bags in the Impala, right next to their duffles.

It was one of those things that he'd noticed had changed about her. Like when they were hunting and she was more liable to hold his hand, less willing to split up to cover ground quicker. He wasn't sure what he meant but he was starting to think that she was trying to let him know that her position with him was much more permanent then it had been.

Though, she could have just said that.

*

Sam's shook his head, his shaggy hair shaking like a dogs fur sending dirt flying. He turned towards where the assault came from and was met by Liz's innocent grin, the shovel - that she'd been using to dig the holes for the daisies Jess had asked her to plant – dangling from her fingers.

“I'm going to make you pay for that.”

She stood and started to back away from him, “Yeah, you and what army?”

“I don't need an army,” he grabbed the hose that was sitting next to him. He could tell from her expression that she hadn't thought through her attack.

“You wouldn't.”

He squeezed the nozzle ignoring her surprised scream as the cold water hit her, “I would.”

*

Breath coming in gasps and chest heaving, Liz let out an adrenaline wired laugh. She'd called it. Their peaceful – however peaceful hunting full time could be – stint had come to an end. Fairly quickly too. Glancing at Dean as he focused on the road, she shook her head.

Leave it to the Winchester's to piss off yet another 'all powerful' demon.

“So what's the deal with this Lilith?”

END.

Thanks for reading this and putting up for all the delays as of late. I hope you enjoyed it :}