A Baby Story (AU, ?C Teen) *Need Kyle, Isabel, Michael*

[KatnotKath]

~Liz~

“Guess we must look pretty pathetic huh?”

I don’t answer…I don’t really want to think about how I look. What do I care…what do I care about now that this has happened…? Looking over at Kyle, I see him shrug and look out the window.

“I know you don’t want to talk right now and I don’t blame you but I…I don’t want to go back home or be alone right now. I…”

He trails off, running his hand through his hair and I can see how much all of this is hurting him too.

“Would you mind if I just sit here…I promise I won’t say anything. I just need to be…be here…”

I think it’s more a case of him needing to not be at home, but I can’t say no. Kyle is hurting and that’s understandable…I should definitely be able to relate to that, and he’s my friend so I should do what I can. I give him a weak smile. “Sure Kyle, of course you can stay here a while…” I can’t imagine what it must be like for him…it’s going to be hard enough seeing Max at school, but Tess is living in his house…she’s sleeping in his old room… I sigh. We’re in a real mess aren’t we…? Yet however much I want to, I can never hate Max…what he did…I suppose I drove him to it to some extent…that night with Kyle… God I wish I could go back and change it…I don’t know what I’d do, but I know I wouldn’t do that again. To let him believe that I betrayed him like that…it was so difficult, but at least at that time I thought I was doing it for my friends… Didn’t help Alex though did it…? I look down at my hands, twiddling my thumbs. “This is all my fault…” I whisper softly.

[FallenMagic]

~ Kyle ~

I look at her sharply as she says it's her fault. I shake my head at her, refusing to let her think that.

"No, it's not." I tell her firmly. "None of this is your fault. It was...waiting to happen, bound to happen sooner or later." I laugh bitterly as I mutter, "Happened sooner than I expected it would..."

[KatnotKath]

Liz

"No, it's not…None of this is your fault. It was...waiting to happen, bound to happen sooner or later…Happened sooner than I expected it would..."

It comes as a shock as I realise that Kyle honestly believes that. I know better though…if I hadn’t done what I did…driven them together…it would never have happened…if anyone had gotten pregnant with Max’s child it would have been me… Not that I would want to be a teenage mother…no, I don’t envy Tess for that part of the equation, but still…oh who am I kidding…she has got what I dreamt of…it wouldn’t matter how old I was, whether we were teenagers or older, my dream was to marry Max…to have his children… I sigh, not really knowing what to say to Kyle. I want to tell him that he’s wrong…that it could have been so different, but that means telling him about FutureMax, and I don’t know that I can do that… I did what Max asked…just as he knew that I would…I don’t think that I was fully prepared for the consequences though… I look over at Kyle. “I’m really pathetic aren’t I…?” I comment with a wry smile. “It’s not like Max and I were together…it’s not like he cheated on me…he just moved on…” I cover my mouth with my hand, refusing to start crying again.

[isabelle]

Okay, I’m gonna go on without Tess …
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

*MAX*

Tess nods. “Good night, Max,” she says, giving my hand a squeeze and looking up at me, expectantly.

I pause, suddenly feeling very awkward. Tess and I never even went on a real date, but she’s carrying my baby. A moment like this does seem to call for a good-bye kiss. It’s not like I’ve never kissed her before. There was the Prom, and of course the night we were together, and the times she mind-warped me. But this is just… different.

I do care for her. I love her. It’s not her fault I’m not in love with her. But this is what it is. This is where I am. I hope that someday I can feel that way about her, although I know she’ll never be like Liz.

I put on a smile, thinking about how much I care about her and the baby, how much she’s done for me in the last several months, how much we’re going to be depending on one another in the future to get through this, to raise our son, to survive all the dangers out there. I do love her. She means so much to me. I’m not going to let her down.

I lean over to kiss her, aiming for her cheek, but she turns and meets my lips with hers. She’s warm and sweet and wonderful, but she’s not Liz. Why can’t I get past that? Liz is over. She’ll never love me again.

I pull back and smile again, reaching out to push her hair back into place with my fingers.

“Get some sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow,” I tell her and I get up from the sofa. She takes my hand and gets to her feet. I watch her turn and head back to the bedroom that once was Kyle’s.

I look around and I’m not too surprised to see the Sheriff watching me. “I’ll walk you out,” he tells me. Nodding, I walk with him to the front step. I stand there as he lets the door shut behind us, knowing that he’s not done with me. “You got anything else to tell me, Max?” he asks.

I frown, glancing at my shoes before managing to meet his eyes. I have an idea what he’s thinking about but I’m not exactly sure how to answer his question.

“Liz,” he explains. “I know the two of you weren’t exactly together, but I thought you were still interested in her. And it was only a few weeks ago that you were complaining to me about Tess wanting to get into your pants.”

He stops, waiting for me to explain and I’m not at all sure what I’m going to say.

[FallenMagic]

Tess seems to be missing quite a lot

~* Kyle *~

I look over at Liz and pull her next to me. Her shoulders are shaking just a little and I know she's trying hard not to cry.

"You're not pathetic at all." I reply. "You loved Max. You were just going through a troubled spot. Look at me...I've never been on a date with Tess and I'm upset. Why shouldn't you be upset too? You love Max!"

Suddenly a thought occurs to me and I start to laugh. Liz looks at me oddly and I try to hold back my laugh to explain. "This kind of reminds me of that Friends sotry line where Rachel and Ross were on a break and Ross goes and sleeps with someone else!" then, suddenly realizing that I just admited I watched Friends, I hastly explained, "Umm...not like I watch that show or anything. Tess made me watch it!"

[M]

*~TESS~*


After Max says goodbye I walk to Kyle's -My- room and curl up on the bed. I'm so confused and worried. I just want someone to tell me that everything will be ok.

I kissed Max on the lips deliberatly, hoping it would help me feel more for him, help me forget he isn't really the one I want to be kissing. He is wonderful, but he just doesn't...
I know its the same for him really, I can never fill the place of Liz Parker. I wonder how it will affect our child, will he know that his parents will always love someone else more than eachother? Will that screw him up for life? Will he understand the sacrifice someday when he falls in love? Will it be enough?

Can you make yourself love someone? If you really want to? Or need to?

I hope for our sons sake that Max and I can move past everything and start to create a family. Including everyone seems too much to hope for- Liz and Maria will definately hate me for all time, with good reason- but Kyle has been so great and Isabel was nicer, maybe even in time Michael will come around too.

Seeing what Max's parents say tomorrow will be a big step. Although I have trepidations I know that together we can deal with whatever will happen.

I take a deep calming breath and realise the truth behind my last thought. Together we have already gotten through a lot. Liz sleeping with Kyle, the skins, the dupes, New York and the summit. We still have a destiny to fulfill somehow! But we have faced everything so far and come out the otherside. We will face this too.

I wish Kyle hadn't left but I understand why he did. Besides, I no longer have the right to ask anything of him. I thought this was the way it was supposed to be but I'm not sure anymore. Is it possible to fulfill my destiny without hurting him anymore? Is destiny more important than hurting him? Or hurting anyone else?

He was so protective in the discussion with his father. He obviously is furious with Max, but his immediate willingness to support and protect me makes my heart beat just that bit faster. The memory of the look in his eye as he held me in front of the Crashdown earlier this evening still stops my breath for a moment and pauses my thoughts of happpy families.
The thing is in my happy family day-dream its always Kyle and I holding our son. Max is there, but he's not the man I hold my child to saying 'hello daddy'. He isn't the man holding me as we watch our son go off to the first day of school, or the man in the backyard teaching him to play baseball. In my minds-eye that man will always be Kyle Valenti.
except in reality it will be Max

Too tired and worn out to continue in this way I roll over and turn out the light, not even bothering to get under the covers.

A little later I hear Jim at the door. He just speaks my name 'Tess'. His voice sounds protective and weary, but a little awed too. I can't talk to him anymore tonight so I pretend to be asleep and after a moment he leaves.

I strain to hear the front door, waiting for Kyles return. Trying to find something else to say to him to make it better, hoping he has found something to say to me to make it better. Hoping he has comforted Liz, yet terrified what that comfort might have involved.

After what seems like hours but couldn't have been longer then 30 minutes I can no longer just lay here still and I move quietly to the door. The house is dark and silent. Jim has gone to bed. I put the blanket from my bed and walk to the living room. Kyle isn't there.
Not sure what to do I sit on the couch, the blanket wrapped around me. After a while I lay down. 'Just a little nap while I'm waiting- its good for the baby, I'm sure he needs his rest'...

hope thats ok, I tried to stay with what the past Tesses have done. I thought Kyle can decide what he wants to do about the conversation when he gets home, leave her, talk to her, tell her to go to bed, your choice. If you want something changed let me know. Also, Jim coming in is obviously after he finishes his conversation with Max

[Galita]

Sorry I haven't post much here goes nothing.


~*Isabel*~

I look at Michael and it makes me think of everything that was going on. Alex's death, Max and Tess expecting a baby.

"Michael?" I ask softly.

"Hm?" He said.

"What do you think about Max and Tess and the baby thing?" I ask.

"I think that he was stupid. And I hate the idea." He said look at me from the corner of his eye.

I just nod and sigh.

[KatnotKath]

Liz

Kyle puts his arms around me, pulling me closer. At one time I used to enjoy the feel of his arms around mine…of being close to him…at one time we were more than just friends… That was all before Max though…before Max changed all our lives forever.

"You're not pathetic at all." he replies "You loved Max. You were just going through a troubled spot. Look at me...I've never been on a date with Tess and I'm upset. Why shouldn't you be upset too? You love Max!"

For one moment I wonder whether everything would have been better if I had never gone to see Max after he healed me…if we had just continued as though nothing had happened. I wonder whether I could ever have been happy with Kyle…but I know the truth really…I never knew what love was until I met Max… Kyle was a friend, a good friend…and yes, I went out with him…but our relationship would never have lasted… The feelings I have for him are not those you should have for your boyfriend… We’re just friends, nothing more, nothing less…

Suddenly Kyle starts to laugh and I look at him puzzled.

"This kind of reminds me of that Friends story line where Rachel and Ross were on a break and Ross goes and sleeps with someone else! …Umm...not like I watch that show or anything. Tess made me watch it!"

I raise my eyebrows. Under other circumstances I’m sure that this would have me in fits of laughter, enjoying teasing Kyle, but right now I’m just not in the mood. “Whatever you say…” I murmer, my mind obviously elsewhere… I take a look at the clock and sigh. “Look Kyle, I am grateful for you coming over to try and help…but right now, I think I’m gonna be better on my own…besides, you’re dad’s going to be getting worried if you’re out much longer…” I point out softly.

[FallenMagic]

~* Kyle *~

I glance at the clock, surprised to note just how late it was. Nodding I get up and give Liz a quick squeeze on the shoulder. "You hang in there, Parker." I tell her. "You're stronger than most of us."

When Liz just smiles a little sadly at me, I run a hand through my hair nervously, suddenly unsure of how to help her. She's obviously in a lot of pain and hurt. Instead, I head over to the window and start to get out. But then, I pause, wanting to say something to giveher hope.

"Liz?" I say. When she looks up at me questioningly, I say, "We're going to get through this, you just have to work at it."

"Maybe..." Liz shrugged.

I slipped out of Liz's room and quickly scrambled down the balcony. I sighed as I began to head towards home. I knew that I had avoided Tess till now but I knew that once I got home, I wouldn't find it so easy to brush off talking to her.

[isabelle]

*MAX*

I frown at Jim's question, shifting uncomfortably from one foot to the other. "I'm not sure I can explain it, Sheriff." I tell him. He's been acting as Tess' father lately. How can I talk to him about this when I barely understand it myself? I don't really know why it happened. "Maybe it was just something to do with us being married ... before."

"Uh-huh," he says, sounding un-convinced. "Do you love her?"

"Of course, I do," I say, and it's true, as far as it goes.

"The same way you loved Liz?" he asks, cutting to the core of it all.

I look down, feeling my shoulders slump. "Liz doesn't love me anymore," I say. "Not after Alex. Especially not now." Not that I blame her. I wonder what it would be like if it were the other way around. If Liz were pregnant with Kyle's baby. Would I still be able to love her? But I already know the answer. I've loved her all this time, even knowing they had slept together. If she still wanted me, even with Kyle's baby, I would be there for her. In any way she wanted...

"Uh-huh," the sheriff says again as if he doesn't quite agree. But in this case, I know I'm right. Liz hates me now. That part is over. The sheriff continues, "So you're just going to be with Tess now."

I shrug. "That's right." It won't be the first time something like this happened. A shotgun wedding. Or a marriage of political convience. It'll certainly make folks on Antar happy if and when we ever meet up with them. "He's my son. I'm going to do whatever I need to for him."

"What about Tess? What about you? Is this what's best for the two of you?"

I look up into his face, hoping he can see how serious I am. "Maybe this isn't the best of all possible worlds," I admit. "But it's the best option we have left."

"You're sure about that?" he asks.

I nod, wondering if he's still thinking about his suggestion to abort the baby. That's something we can't do. "I'll see you tomorrow," I tell him.

"Okay," he says. "Good-night, then.

I head down the walk feeling tired and lost. For tonight, it's over. Tomorrow, there's school and talking to my parents. And nothing gets any easier after that.

I can't help but think of Liz. How destroyed she looked when I saw her last. I hate myself for doing that to her. I only hope she finds some way to feel better.