Roswell Fanatics

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Banner made by the fabulously talented Shiesty23

Author:Roslover39
Category:AU
Rating:Adult

Disclaimer: The characters of Roswell belong to the WB, Melinda Metz, and UPN.


I'd like to thank my BETAMNIrish77(love ya GF) and Suicide_Eagle_Rath
for their assistance on this fic.
As well as:
girl afraid
roswell4eva
karenfaye
sweet and spicy
vilandragirl
lyric
duccia
somewhere87
Thanks guys for your suggestions and ideas


Summary:
Imagine the alter egos of the Roswell gang playing a rip roaring round of truth or dare with guest appearances from some of the re-occurring guest cast.



It’s a boring, rainy night in Roswell. Maria and Liz are at Alex’s house playing cds and watching him check out various porn sites.

Liz comes up with a scathingly brilliant idea to make the evening a lot more interesting. “Alex! I am so bored! We need to find something fun to do.” She looks conspiratorially at Maria and winks, “Let’s play truth or dare!

Alex barely registers the comment due to the fact that he is enthralled with his computer screen. Throwing over his shoulder, “Liz, we know everything we care to know about each other, what’s the point?”

Liz looks over at Alex then back at Maria. “You’re right Alex, let’s get the gang to come over and play with us. We need fresh blood to make the game more interesting.” Rummaging around in her purse for her silver cellphone, “I’ll call them over right now.”

Maria shakes her head and winces slightly. “Liz this is a bad idea, what if we get in trouble?”

Alex looks at Maria. “Get a grip, this is gonna be fun!” Finally facing away from his monitor with a glimmer of hope in his eyes. Thinking to himself, this could get interesting with the rest of the group here. Who needs the Internet when I can possibly see the real thing right in front of my face!

Liz is ecstatic about the thought of the gang getting together and unearthing deep, dark secrets. She turns to Maria. “Well Ria, you’ve just been outvoted. Let the fun begin!”

While Liz is pulling her cell phone out of her purse, Alex is pacing around in the living room. Then all of a sudden he stops, runs to Liz and grabs her arm. “Liz, do you have to invite Isabel? I don’t want that bitch in my house. She’s always hanging on me like she wants to do me. She knows I’m not attracted to her ass in the least.”

Liz pulls her arm away from Alex’s grasp. “Alex, chill out! Sometimes you gotta pay a price to have a little fun.” Liz calls Michael’s place first.

“Truth or dare? I don’t know Liz.” Michael’s voice is heard from the other end.

“Oh come on sexy, you know you wanna! Just think you’ll be privy to things you never thought you would.”

There is a slight pause before, “Well, if Max and Isabel go, I guess I’ll tag along.”

“Shit Michael, grow a backbone. Tonight is the night, be there or be square.” Liz hangs up the phone.

The next call Liz makes is to Kyle’s.

“Truth or dare? Oh ok, but I’m not bringing Tess. She’s been working my nerves all day!” He said in a sharp, irritated tone.

Liz doesn’t like the sound of that. “You gotta bring Tess, she’s come to be a good a friend to me and truth be told Maria is boring the hell out of me.” Looking over at Maria trying to convince Alex that Isabel coming over is a good thing.

After about thirty minutes, the first of the guests arrive. It’s Kyle and Tess.

Kyle turns to Tess. “Don’t make me regret that I brought your ass along.” They enter Alex’s living room where Maria and Liz are chilling out. Why the hell am I here, I could be at my girlfriend’s crib getting laid.”

Kyle notices Maria sitting in a corner with her head in her hands. “Hey why is Maria sitting in a corner looking like that?”

Alex turns to Kyle and holds out his hand in greeting. “Maria is looking like that because she doesn’t think Liz’s idea of truth or dare is a good one, but she’s too chicken shit to want to be left out.”

Maria looks up and frowns at what Alex said about her.

Tess glances over at Liz. She plops down on the couch to join her, “Hey, glad to see you here.”

Liz hugs Tess. “Yeah it just wouldn’t be a good time without you!”

There’s a knock at the door. Alex makes Maria get up and answer it.

It’s Max, Michael and Isabel. As they walk in Maxi is the first to speak. He’s wearing a brown shirt that’s unbuttoned to his navel, a baseball cap and jeans hanging off his ass. “How the hell is everybody? Hey I smell sex and candy!”

Michael makes a beeline over to Liz who’s jumping on a brown leather couch waving a sweater she took off into the air, exposing her paisley bra with Tess grinning up at her like an idiot.

“Hey babe.” Michael’s attention perks her up even more.

She jumps into his arms. “Michael, I can’t wait to get this show on the road.”

“I hope we’re not making a mistake doing this.” He kisses her cheek.

“What if things get out of control Liz?” He wraps his arms around her warm body.

“Well studly, we’re bound to have a very interesting evening just to say the least.” He swings her down off the couch where she then takes his hand and pulls him over to where the rest of the gang has gathered.

Alex walks past Isabel and sneers. “It wasn’t my idea having you here.”

Isabel answers him timidly. “Can’t you at least try to be nice to me? I can’t help the way I feel about you Alex.” She looks at him with doe eyes, then a spark of desire runs through the look, “I…I want your body!”

Alex rolls his eyes and answers her unfazed. “Whatever!”
>< >< ><

ENJOY

Liz decides that now is the time to get the show on the road. “Well, I’m so glad everyone could come. We’ll get started just as soon as I set the mood.” She pops John Mayer’s “Your Body Is A Wonderland” in the stereo system, dims the lights and gives directions on what’s gonna happen next. “Ok everybody lets all sit in a circle on the floor.” Indicating a space she just vacated by moving a table slightly out of the way.

Michael walks behind Liz and rubs her shoulders before taking a seat on the floor with everyone else.

Sitting down and getting comfortable Liz looks around at the handsome group. “Ok, thanks for coming. But before we start the game, I need to set some ground rules. 1. This game is no holds barred, if you’re too timid to have a good time, now’s the time to hit the bricks. 2. Whatever happens here stays here, kinda like the Vegas theme. No one is to utter a word of what was said or done here to anyone after the fact, agreed?”

After everyone nods yes in agreement to Liz’s rules she turns to Michael sitting beside her.

Max stands up and starts the game. “Truth or dare Isabel.”

“Me? Oh ok.” She looks around the group but inevitably her gaze falls back to Alex.

Isabel thinks for a minute then answers him. “Truth!”

Everyone groans in response to her answer. Max shushes everyone then looks back at Isabel. “Isabel, tell us about the vision you had after you kissed Alex the day me and Liz were MIA?”

Isabel looks like she’s going to pass out from sheer embarrassment. And Alex looks like he’s gonna hurl.

Looking sharply over at her brother, “Max, how could you, I told you that in confidence!” Isabel folds her hands in her lap and takes a deep breath before she tells everyone what she saw. Max is grinning in delight. “I saw Alex and me naked in bed having sex, ok is everybody happy now?” She says in a rush.

Isabel decides to get her brother back, “Truth or dare Max!

Max answers “Dare.”

“Max I dare you to tell Maria how you really feel about her.”

Max walks over to Maria, nudges her until she’s flat on the floor and straddles her. “Maria, I’ve been trying to fight this, but I can’t.” He looks deeply into her eyes “ I have to tell you I’ve wanted you ever since the first time I saw you in your Crashdown waitress uniform. “

Max leans down and plants an explosive kiss on her. Maria submits to him as he urges her up off of the floor. They run upstairs to Alex’s father’s bedroom hand in hand. Laughter and a slammed door are heard.



The game is interrupted by a knock on the door. It’s Agent Pierce.
When Liz opens the door, Agent Pierce runs in like someone is after him. “I know you’re not gonna believe this but a spaceship just landed and I’m being chased by aliens that are three feet tall, green and slimy! This is the last thing I need.” Looking about frantically, “Can I stay here with you all?”

Michael answers Pierce, “sure you’re more than welcome here, right gang?” Indicating the now vacant couch, “Hey why don’t you pull up a seat and watch us play.”

Everyone in the room smiles and nods in agreement to have Agent Pierce take a seat.

>< >< ><

The game is going strong when there’s another knock on the door. It’s Zan. He’s wearing a Pee-Wee Herman suit and bowtie. His hair is dyed Billy Idol blonde. “Looks like you’re having a party and nobody bothered to invite me, how rude!” He’s standing and holding his left wrist in a very effeminate way. He starts to lick his lips in anticipation of what the evening might bring as he scans the room.

Liz resumes the game. “Zan sit your ass down and shut the fuck up!” Looking at Alex, “Alex, truth or dare?”

“Truth.” He looks at Liz confidently, knowing there isn’t much Liz doesn’t know about him.

“Ok, Alex what’s the one thing we don’t’ know about you?”


Unprepared but willing to shock the hell out of her he answers dreamily, “I’ve always wanted to do Mrs. Evans doggie style.”

Isabel is more than repulsed by that admission and shudders visibly, “Ewww, you don’t wanna fuck me, but you fantasize about my wrinkly old lady?”

Alex gives Izzie a shrug and throws her a smirk.

Tess takes a turn. “Truth or dare Zan.”

Zan purses his lips as he answers quietly. “Dare.”

Tess raises her eyebrows to the challenge. “I dare you to kiss the person you’re attracted to in this room in the mouth.”

Zan takes a thoughtful stroll half way around the circle of people. Then he leans down and plants a fat kiss on…. Michael!

Michael doesn’t fight the kiss; on the contrary he seems to like it.

Liz jumps up and states: “Yee ha go Broke back on him Zan!”

Michael looks up at Zan after the kiss. “Damn Zan, I thought we was gonna keep this between the two of us?”

Zan shrugs, “That would be like quitting you and I just can’t do that.” He says dramatically.

Zan then turns to ask Alex if he and Michael can use a bedroom upstairs.

Alex nods yes but Liz stops them before they head upstairs.
“Hey can I watch?

Michael looks at Zan and then gestures for her to come along.
Zan frowns at her and says, “Stay out of the line of fire, and you won’t get hurt.”

As the three head upstairs, there’s another knock on the door. It’s Kal Langley and Nasedo. Langley speaks while Nasedo just looks at everyone.

“Hello, we were the protectors of the royal four. But then I went to Hollywood and somehow the booze, fame and fortune came to bore the hell out of me.” Pointing at Nasedo standing next to him, “Dipshit here made a deal with a corrupt monarch wanna be then corrupted a young mind and just made an ass out of himself. We now see the error of our ways and wanna go back to Antar. Does anybody know where we can find the Granolith or the spaceship we landed here on?”

Nobody bothers to answer him, as they enter the house. Noticing Agent Pierce sitting on the couch, Langley and Nasedo both go over and shake his hand.

Courtney walks in behind them. “Hey everybody, yeah I know you thought I died. But I made a deal with Nicholas to make it look that way.” She shrugged and took a seat on the floor. “Michael actually thought I meant all those things I said about him being a better king than Max. I just wanted to do him one time. When I realized he couldn’t kiss for shit, I figured it was time to get the hell out of dodge by any means necessary. Whatcha playin’?”

Alex takes one look at Courtney and asks her to play. “Courtney, truth or dare?”

Figuring it out quickly she answers, “Truth.”

Alex crawls seductively over to Courtney. “Do you think I’m sexy?”

“Hot damn! Does this mean we’ll have sex? Let’s do it!” Alex looks at all that remains in the circle.” Whatever you do, don’t come in the basement.” Alex is heard telling Courtney, “I’m gonna turn on the washing machine, plop you on top of it and wear your ass out!” As they leave the room Alex is practically dragging Courtney downstairs.

Kyle looks over at who’s left at the party. It’s him, Tess and Isabel. He then notices Kal Langley pull out a pack of cards. He starts a friendly game of Spades with Pierce and Nasedo.

Isabel gets a gleam in her eye, goes over to Tess and leans down to whisper something in her ear. Both girls stand up and walk over to Kyle grinning like Cheshire cats in heat.

Isabel starts the plan in motion. “Well Kyle it’s just you me and Tess. What are we gonna do about this?”

Tess chimes in. “Yeah Kyle, I know we never appealed to you but hey let’s throw caution to the wind and do what everybody else is doing.” Indicating the Spade players, “besides Nasedo, Pierce and Langley. Let’s leave our troubles behind. Try it, you might find you enjoy sex with two willing alien babes.”

Kyle throws up his hands and says, “Damn, of all the girls here tonight, I end up with you two. Well what the hell let’s get this over with.”

Agent Pierce stares while Isabel unzips and then unbuttons Kyle’s pants, then she leads him onto the floor. Tess leans down and starts to kiss him, while slowly unbuttoning his shirt.

Like a streak of light, Grant Sorenson rushes into the house. He walks quickly past Nasedo, Langley and Agent Pierce still playing cards.

As he walks around a couch he notices Tess, Kyle and Isabel on the floor busily amusing themselves in their ménage-a-trois. Noticing Isabel triggers the reason why he’s there. “Isabel, I’m so glad to see you, where’s your brother Max?”

Isabel doesn’t look nor speak; she’s too into the horsy ride she’s getting on top of Kyle to be bothered.

Grant is getting annoyed to the extent that he starts hollering out Max’s name throughout the house. He makes his way upstairs and comes to the room with Zan, Liz and Michael. He knocks and hollers Max’s name. Liz answers him. “Shut the fuck up you raving idiot, it’s sex going on up in here!”

Grant makes his way through the bedrooms until he finds the one currently occupied by Max and Maria. He slowly opens the door so that he won’t be seen and makes sure he has the right bedroom. He notices that Max is straddling Maria as she’s tied to the bed by her wrists and ankles. Max is singing while she’s begging him to stop.

“More, more, more how do you like it, how do you like it!”

While this is going on, Grant is busy taking his clothes off. After getting completely naked, he walks all the way into the room.

Max stops his pounding of Maria just long enough to notice Grant. “Hey dude, Isabel is downstairs.”

Grant replies as he walks closer to the bed, “I don’t want Isabel, I want you. It’s always been you. You’re my dreamboat Max!”
The sight of Maria being tied up excites Grant. “Max, you’re the one I’ve been waiting for. Tie me up; tie me down, do what you will!” Grant jumps on the bed with both hands out in surrender to Max. “Whip me, beat me, choke me, hurt me!”

Meanwhile downstairs, Agent Pierce looks down at what is happening right in front of him with Kyle, Tess and Isabel and gets an enormous hard on. Realizing there is nobody else available to do but Nasedo and Langley, he asks them a question. “Hey guys ever do a human before?”

Nasedo scratches his head as he ponders the question. “No, I don’t believe I have, what about you Langley?”

Putting down his cards and thinking back, “I was too busy writing to the government to ban lemons to worry about sex with anyone. I hate lemons, the taste, and the smell ewwww! But hey if you two are welling to get it on, I’m game!”

Nasedo throws out his hand and Agent Pierces’ clothes disappear.

Langley waves his hand and a white handkerchief appears in Agent Pierces’ mouth.

Pierce starts jumping around and babbling. Nasedo waves his hand so that he can comprehend what he’s saying. “Goody, I always wanted to be molested by extra-terrestrials!”

Langley grins at Nasedo. “Remember the old days when we used to do human probes, lets add a human sex variation to it just for fun!”

Unbeknownst to the busy revelers inside the outside of the house becomes shrouded in an otherworldly yellow light. The theme from The X-Files is heard so loudly that it wakes up the whole neighborhood. As the music gets louder an alien spacecraft is seen overhead. As soon as the aircraft makes it’s appearance above the house, POOF!
The house and the aircraft disappear. A neighbor walks past the huge, gapping hole where the house had been and shrugs, "And I thought we wanted to leave town!"

ANTAR!!!!

Ros is having problems with her computer so I am posting her newest update!


*Amazing banner by Shiesty!*

Antar Truth or Dare:
The Mayhem Continues!

Author:Roslover39
Category:AU/Slash
Rating:Adult

Dislaimer: The characters of Roswell belong to The WB, Melinda Metz and UPN

As usual I would like to thank my BETA & Muse Irish77 for being such a kick ass babe! I would also like to thank Suicide_Eagle_Rathfor her diabolical mind :hug:

Update: Aliens hijacked Alex’s house and it’s
inhabitants from Earth’s atmosphere. Destination?
Antar.

><><><

“Hey I think we’re moving!” Michael states

Zan replies, “You bet we are big boy.”

Liz interjects, smacking Zan on his exposed ass, “No numb nuts, he means the house.” She holds onto a picture frame that has fallen off the dresser, “The house is moving literally! Damn does that mean I don't get my turn Michael? You let Zan here take up all my time?” Liz puts her hands on her hips and gives Michael a sexy pout. The screams coming from all directions of the house suggests the party’s over. Or is it? Maria is screaming, “OMG, I knew this would come to no good! God is taking us directly to hell. We’ve been so bad that he didn’t even bother killing us first. He sent representatives to snatch us away from polite society!”

Max is standing on the bed in a surfer pose as he shouts, “Sex, drugs, rock and roll, YEAH! Die young, leaving a good looking corpse.” Grant looks up at Max in total awe of his gorgeousness. “Damn Max you’re so hot!” Grant can’t contain his adoration.

Maria starts screaming in Grant’s ear “We’re on our way to God only knows where and all you can do is gawk at Max like a fool?” Grant looks Maria straight in her eyes and starts to sing, “I had the time of my life no I never felt this way before I swear it’s the truth and I owe it all to.” Grant starts kissing Max’s ankle. “You.”

><><><><

After what seems like an eternity, the house comes to a sudden stop and crashes onto solid ground. By then it seems like everyone has recovered from their various states of undress and is gathered, slightly huddled in the living room. The otherworldly yellow light is seen through the front windows as the space ship parks in front of the house. Two ethereal looking beings appear, the female looks uncannily like Genie Francis of General Hospital fame and the other looks just like Jason Katims, that dastardly writer on a once critically acclaimed Sci-fi show that was copied from the lives of the royal four. But before they enter the house they take a walk half way around the house. Tess rushes to the window and leans out to see what’s going on. She notices a head sticking out of the side of the house, “Who the hell is that?” Tess has no idea.

Then out of the blue twenty 3ft. tall green and slimy aliens dressed as leprechauns start running around the house singing “Ding dong the bastard is dead, the wicked bastard is dead!” After witnessing the person under the house the ethereal beings faces glow like the sun as they enter the house.

The female speaks first, “I’ve waited oh so many years for my children to return to me and free Antar from the tyrannical Kivar. Little did I know his demise would be this easy?” She indicates the head outside the house. The man stands beside the female spouting out gibberish, “Oh this is certainly a monumental day for Antar. We have to make plans for the big welcome back parade and the….”

Tess jumps off the couch by the window and asks the male alien a question. “Hey, has anyone ever told you that you look just like that guy that fucked up that sci-fi romance show on our lives?” Tess says standing in front of him hands on hips.

The male alien extends his glowing hands in an attempt to explains his actions, “In my defense I came to Earth and became the head writer for that show because I found out that someone managed to uncover the story of our lives. I made it my business to fuck up the scripts as much as I could so future episodes would never see the light of day.” He then put his hand over his heart, “I was determined to preserve our way of live by any means necessary! And I can proudly say I did a thorough job of it!”

The female of the twosome interjects, “Lets get to the matter at hand besides I knew the show wouldn’t work from the first episode.” Indicating Max, “Why would a gorgeous alien boy risk life and limb for a flat chested, plain Jane when he could have incest and hide in plain sight with his equally gorgeous alien sister?” Rolling her eyes, “We don’t have sexual hang-ups like that on Antar!”

She starts scanning the room, “Zan, Vilandra where are my children?”

Isabel runs into her mother’s waiting arms, Max is next with his shirt still half off his shoulder and his baggy pants unzipped. Zan brings up the rear switching all the way.

The woman notices the two Zan’s standing before her.

She turns to Isabel and asks a question. “So, which one is the real Zan?”

Isabel looks at her mother strangely, “Mom you mean you can’t tell which one is your son?”

“I never figured I’d have to figure the heir and the spare thing out. I thought maybe a Mack truck or something would hit the duplicate.” She almost hits herself in the forehead, “That’s right, the real king of Antar has a mark on his head.”

“Ewww mother no, not like that evil little boy with the sixes on his scalp? ”Isabel asks wincing. “Yeah but we forgot which head the mark was on.” Isabel’s mother is scratching her head.

“Mother you don’t mean.” Isabel looks over at her mother, shocked.

“Yes dear somebody’s gonna have to get down on their knees and check both guys out.”

Zan jumps for joy and the prospect. “Check me, check me now!” As the male alien starts walking towards both guys, Max just stands at attention, his pants never got zipped.

Both guys present their members to thunderous applause. Their shlongs as well as the tongues of the girls in the room just about hit the floor simultaneously.

Liz is more than impressed by what she’s looking at. She’s almost drooling, “Shit Max had I known you had so much to offer, I would have gladly faked it and been your damsel in distress.”

Maria laughs waving her finger at Liz “Oh no you didn’t. It’s too late and too bad!” He’s mine, mine I tell ya!”

The female alien interrupts Maria’s tirade. “Actually the alien book was wrong. Vilandra and Rath, Zan and Ava weren’t the way it was originally arranged. Zan and his sister are king and queen. Rath was to wed his sister Apple. Some idiot sent Ava to Earth by mistake instead of Apple. He thought the mistake would never be uncovered. We tortured the truth out of the imbecile with a nine-inch vibrator. He gladly confessed.”

Max looks at Isabel with new eyes. “You mean instead of risking life and limb for a flat chested plain Jane, I could have been having hella good alien sex with my blonde busty, lusty sister who just happens to be as gorgeous as me?” Max is struck dumb by the discovery. He slaps his forehead with his hand. “I could have had a V-8!”

The male alien speaks after inspecting Max and Zan’s privates. He then pronounces Zan and not Max, the King of Antar. Zan doesn’t like the sound of that.

Max explodes, “Oh hell no, I’ve had the FBI, Valenti, and every crazy idiot after me for three years and now you tell me I’m not the one?”

“Oh no!” Zan starts waving his hands around. He walks right up to his mother. “Momma, if you want me to rule Antar I’ll do so as her Queen. Michael, Rath or whoever you say my lover is will be my King consort. I will have no other.” Zan stamps his foot and pouts like a spoiled punk.

The male alien questions Zan’s mother, “Whatever are we gonna do?”

Zan ignores the perplexed faces of the crowd and saunters over to a bewildered Michael. “Michael you’ve won my heart and performed so many unspeakable acts at my request. Will you be King of my planet as you’re already king of my heart?”

Michael shakes his head, “King, I’m not prepared to be a king. I was always content to be Max’s second in command. Nothing would make me feel happier than to be the number two.”

Zan looks at his mother, “Well if Michael won’t accept the position, I won’t accept the throne!”

Their mother walks up to Zan and slaps him across the face. “Look baby cakes, if you won’t go along with the program we do have a spare who can easily step into your position remember?” She glances over at Max who is busy making a silver handprint appear and disappear on his stomach.

Well, Max is better than no King at all! She thinks to herself then gestures to the male alien to come to her. “Don’t worry we will have someone on the throne. The bigger problem right now is Nicholas and the five families. I’m sure the word of Kivar’s unfortunate demise is spreading like wildfire.”

Without warning the wind starts to howl and the front door of Alex’s house slams open. In comes Nicholas, Kivar’s trusted henchman. He’s crying his eyes out over his bosses demise.

“Who killed my master? Who killed my master?” he shouts while whimpering and blubbering. He’s having a full blown, good old-fashioned temper tantrum. “You know, I can’t believe my life!” He starts wringing his hands and pacing the hallway of the entry, “I try to be the best henchman I can and serve my master with all due diligence and what do I get?” He puts his head in his hands. “Serving Kivar has been my only source of pleasure…. since the bathtub incident.” The tears start to fall like rain after the mysterious confession.

“The bathtub incident?” Seemingly the entire room utters the words in unison.

Nicholas explains. “Well due to my arms being too short to reach my balls, my mom bathed me nightly.” He let’s out another snivel as he continues his pathetic story. “One night mom got over enthusiastic, BANG! My balls popped off like two deflated balloons.”

He starts to cry again, “The irony of the whole thing is that I’ve always loved women, to smell them, touch them, but because of my height and overly adolescent looks I could never get the women I only wanted the lusty busty type so I never got to have sex. Now I never will!”

last of the post

As Nicholas flies into another rage over his flaccid state, Zan saunters over to Nicholas placing his hand on his shoulder. “Oh Nicholas I really feel for ya home skillet. Is there anything I can do for you?”

Just as hope flashes in Nicholas eyes and he begins wiping his tear stained face with his Disneyland souvenir t-shirt,

A faint and evil smile graces Zan’s lips, “Oops, that’s right! You got nothing to work with, so I can’t do nothing for ya man!” Zan saunters away with a seductive sway tossing a smoldering look over his shoulder.

Zan’s outburst along with the laughter and pointing from every girl in the room has made Nicholas turn beet red. Steam comes out of his ears and after a short moment a loud POP is heard. The group watches Nicholas implode into something that resembles a whoopee cushion.

Just as the levity hits an all time high in the room, another gust of wind brings another participant to the party. A haggard Agent Topolsky races through the door.

“Hey everybody do you smell smoke?” It was thought the agent got killed in a fire at an insane asylum. Her clothes are all sooty and smelly. Max stops playing with his stomach long enough to notice her. He walks up to her, “Just look at those clothes.”

What happens next? Tune in for the next outrageous chapter of Antar Truth or Dare.

When we left the gang on Antar, Agent Topolsky had now joined the party, which Max takes full advantage of.

Max waves his hand and her clothes fly off. He tells his mom, “Hit me up if you need me.” Throwing a wink in her direction Max takes Topolsky by the hand and they run upstairs. Liz and Maria watch and grumble about not being picked, since they both know how well endowed he his.

That was the last straw for Max and Isabel’s mother. When Max and Topolsky return, they are sent to the nearest Antar Motel 6 with the rest of the gang because CSI~Antar declared the house a crime scene(The house fell on Kivar)

* Meanwhile back at the hotel…*

The gang has all settled in at the Antar Motel 6 when boredom quickly sets in. Nasedo turns to Kal Langley and says, “Hey, why don’t we form a Soul Train line and dance our boredom away?”

Kal’s eyes open wide and grabs Nasedo by the shoulders, “What a brilliant idea!”

“But damn! We don’t have the room, where will we dance?” Agent Pierce asks indicating the small front room they have all convened in.

“Let’s take this out into the hall.” Max answers. He waves his hand and a huge disco ball appears on the ceiling.

“Ok everybody, girls on one side, guys on the other,” Alex adds grabbing Kal by the hips.

The two lines are formed; everyone is ready to dance when Liz adds something to it for fun. “Ok dudes and dudettes, before we dance everybody have to take a piece of clothing off.”

The guys take off their pants and the girls take off their tops. Max waves his hand and “That’s The Way I Like It” by K-C and the sunshine band starts to play. Max waves his hand again and Afro wigs pop on everyone’s head. Of course Tess, Maria, Topolsky and Courtney’s wigs are all blonde.

Everyone is having a great time dancing the night away when out of the blue
Max hollers out “love, peace, and soul” holding up the peace sign.

Nasedo and Kal Langley get so excited that they end up floating to the top of the ceiling in total bliss. “Man this is better than the probes we used to do on the humans we caught before the great crash.” Nasedo says elbowing Kal.

He nods his approval. Then they put their heads down in a moment of silence in reverence of the crash, then they float back down to the ground to continue dancing.

At the Palace:

The male alien arranged for a servant to show Zan and Michael around while Isabel and her mother share some alone time to get better acquainted.

Zan’s tour ends at his suite of rooms. As the men enter the room, he starts to frown.
“Oh no no no!” He makes his way through the four spacious rooms shaking his finger in the air. He declares the accommodations to be abysmal. “The color scheme is WAY too dark and gloomy for me!” He waves his hand and the color of the walls turn from a respectable brown to a very over the top baby pink.

“That’ s more like it!” He turns to Michael, “Hold on to your hat baby, I have a lot of work to do to make our rooms more presentable.”

The servant shakes his head “May I take my leave your highness?”

“Oh yeah shoo now, I’ll ring if I need you.” Zan gestures the servant out with his hands.

As Zan blissfully redoes the décor of his suite, Michael sits in a chair with his head in his hands. He has something important to say and has no idea how to say it. Zan senses something isn’t right and goes over to Michael.

“What’s wrong Michael?” Zan takes Michael’s hand, concern showing in his hazel eyes.

“Zan I have something to say to you and you’re not gonna like it.” Michael stands up and puts Zan in the chair. “Zan I’ve had one hellava time with you but I have to admit, I’m not gay. I was just in the mood to experiment, and you were more than willing to show me the ropes.” Indicating the baby pink room, “I can’t stay here, I’m gonna see if Liz or the other girls will let me stay with them at the motel.”

Zan puts his hands on his hips, “You’ve got some nerve, and you wanna go back to the girls after sexing me? Go then get the hell out of my room.” He stamps his foot like a petulant child. “Get the hell out of my Palace right now!”

Michael gathers his things, walks out the room and shuts the door. Zan walks over to one of the many windows in his bedroom and looks out over Antar singing “ I Will Survive” by Gloria Gaynor gesturing very effeminately with his hands.

Michael gets a palace chauffeur to drive him to the Motel where the sound of Disco music can be heard as he steps out of the car. He doesn’t bother to check in as he follows the music straight to the party floor.

Max is the first to see him, “Hey Michael welcome back take off your shirt.” Max waves his hand and an Afro wig appears on Michael’s head as he lines up with the rest of the guys in the soul train line. As luck would have it, Michael dances down the line with Liz. He starts the groveling process right away.

“Liz, I’m not with Zan anymore. I told him I’m not gay. I want to be with you Liz, you’re my dream girl.”

Liz stare’s blankly at him, “Now where have I heard that one before?”

The conversation continues as they dance their way down the hall then the sound of a loud husky voice can be heard over the merriment. It’s Zan looking for Michael. He hasn’t given up on him yet.

Zan’s hands are on his hips, “Michael, I’ve come to give you a second chance!”

He unknowingly lines himself up with the disco ball overhead as he speaks. The ball falls and hits Zan right on the head. He tumbles to the ground, unconscious.

“Put him in my room.” Topolsky hollers to Max and Alex as they pick Zan up off the ground.

“Why your room?” Courtney asks.

“Why not?” Topolsky responds, eyeballing the bulge in Zan’s jeans.



After Isabel has settled in her suite of rooms, she finds her mother at work with a servant on the details for the coronation. Isabel interrupts their conversation.

“Mother may I speak with you?” She sits down on a lightly padded chair.

“Yes what is it dear?” Still looking at the papers in front of her she indicates she is listening with the tilt of her head.

“Mom, this question has plagued me for years. I hoped and prayed I’d be able to ask you this.” Holding her hands in her lap like a small child.

“Go ahead, but I’d much rather call you Vilandra hon.” She says looking up at Isabel.

“Mother, of all the planets to send your children to, why did you send us to Earth? Why didn’t you send us to Andromeda or any other planet? After all there's a huge galaxy out there.”

“Yes I know but what you don’t know is that Earthlings are considered the ugliest species in the galaxy. We had no choice but to make you look like them because we just couldn’t get any other life forms to cooperate with us. Politics can be a real bitch sometimes. Anyway looking the way you all did, we had to put you where you
would blend in perfectly. Earth was our only alternative. You and your brother would be of no use to us if you didn’t survive.” Putting all the papers away into a folder on her lap, she now gives Isabel her full attention. “Yes I know the sexual practices of Earthlings are archaic to say the least but when the shit hits the fan you have to work with what you can get your hands on.” Isabel’s mother says very matter of factly.

“Oh!” Isabel replies totally stunned.



When the gang returns to the Palace on the day of Zan’s coronation they’re in for a big surprise. After Zan got hit with the disco ball and came to, gone was the effeminate man that arrived at Alex’s door. In his place was a bold, virile man.

The Pee Wee Herman Suit turned into a soft leather jacket and form fitting black jeans. This hair turned from shocking white to coal black instantly. Almost immediately he became the man that women would give or do anything to sleep with. Topolsky was no different and from there they spent the next few days having sex. Floating through the air during sex, having hour long orgasms with Zan quickly mastering the ancient Antarian ability to have sex all day or all night long. Had Zan not been able to “heal” Topolsky through their act of being joined, he would have literally killed her in due course.

The act of cementing that the Antarians use to join with someone foreign, we Earthlings call The Hokey Pokey. And you can just guess what gets stuck in and out.



The day of the coronation has arrived.

The gang stayed at the Palace the night before to make sure they didn’t have another drunken orgy and show up late or not at all.

There are many surprises in store. Everyone from Antarian society is there. There’s even a Simon Cowell like person critiquing the outfits of all the guests. “Oh no girlfriend why did you bother coming out the house in that ugly frock?”

After the champagne and the crudités, the main event arrives.

The announcement is made: “Lords ladies and gentlemen, with pleasure may I present Zan Of Antar. “

Zan is a figure of much admiration and lust as he makes his way down to the front of the throne room. Beautifully adorned in black from head to toe, his every gesture screams want me! He makes his way to his mother and the Arch bishop who crowns him King of Antar.

The Archbishop gestures with his hands, indicating that the ceremony is over, and the crowd who are beyond joyful to have their rightful monarch back rise to their feet and Zan turns to face thunderous applause. He places his long slender fingers between his luscious lips and lets out a loud whistle. Like clockwork, Topolsky runs out to meet Zan. When she gets to him, he puts his arm around her shoulder. She’s dressed in a snow-white gown. Her hair is done in an elegant chignon and she looks the happiest she’s ever been. Zan smiles at her, kisses her lips and presents her to the gasping crowd.
“Lords, ladies and gentlemen may I present my new bride, Kathleen of Antar.
A hush goes over the crowd just as the eyes of some of the guests look like they might pop out a few heads. The King rules, and the subjects bow in allegiance to Topolsky.



After Zan and Topolsky greet all of his excited subjects, they locate the gang. They all have one question on their minds.

Tess asks Zan, “Hey Zan of all the girls, Why pick Topolsky for your queen?”

Zan gazes down at Tess, smiles at his new bride and answers “Why not?” He gives Topolsky a seductive wink. The merriment goes on at a fever pitch throughout the night.

Zan and Isabel’s mother is glad to have her children back home, the subjects are glad to have the royal family intact again and Zan is overjoyed to be finally living out his destiny.



After Alex’s house went up, the occurrence made news around the world. The attention made the aliens feel welcome enough to come back and negotiate to buy Roswell, NM as a colony of Antar on behalf of the King. The sitting President Chris Rock agreed to the purchase and hoped that this would lead to further contact and negotiations with Earth and the Intergalactic community.



The gang decided to remain on Antar after the coronation. Kyle talked Isabel and Tess into becoming his co-wives. Since Isabel is an Antarian Princess, Kyle was bestowed the title Duke of Roswell, in celebration of the planet’s new acquisition. Isabel’s formal royal title is Princess Vilandra or the Princess formerly known as Isabel, and Tess became the Duchess of Roswell.

Because Max has the same genetic code as Zan, he was given the title of Prince. He was also bestowed a mini Palace and land by his mother that he named The Boner’s Bungalow.

Michael, Liz, Courtney and Alex decided to form the first kibbutz on Antar where they hired a native to teach them various ancient sex practices. Agent Pierce, still interested in law enforcement joined the Antarian guard and invented his present position: Towel boy. Last but not least, Kal Langley and Nasedo decided that since they spent so much time together that they would live together like the Odd Couple. Nasedo became like Oscar and Kal Langley became like Felix

Not long after Zan was crowned King, it is brought to his attention that there was a spy in their midst. It was learned that the male alien broadcasted the whereabouts of the Roswell aliens at Highway 51 to the Earthlings on that fateful day in 1947. As a punishment for treason, the Antar scientists bound the Katims look alike into a spacecraft crashing him to earth in the middle of the LA Neiman Marcus on 5/14/06!

The gang is speechless as the spacecraft whizzes toward Earth’s atmosphere.

Alex breaks the silence. “Even that was too good for him for what he did to us!”

And now for a moment of seriousness:

MAY14, 2002~ The day that will live in infamy in the hearts of Roswell Fans worldwide as the day the story died


I Shall Believe!


2 more chapters left


Next installment~The Judgment

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Thanks Vegas312 for this beautiful banner


Max and the gang decided to remain on Antar after Zan’s coronation ceremony. Kyle, Isabel and Tess got married, had ten children and lived at the palace. Having hybrid children became the rage because of them. Due to the high demand of hybrid children, Kyle opened a fertility clinic. Antarians have black bulging eyes, while hybrids have blue, green or hazel eyes. The fertility clinic has served thousands of Antarian couples at it’s peak; becoming the McDonalds of the galaxy. Kyle asked Liz to go into business with him; she refused stating flatly that she’d rather use her body rather than her brains to affect change on Antar.

Alex, Maria, Michael and Courtney established the first Kibitz and brought a new form of exercise to the religious/sexual rituals on Antar. They invented Sexercise. This technique killed three birds with one stone. You could perform your religious ritual, get some exercise because of the revved up way the technique is performed and takes sex to the next level due to Antar’s atmosphere.

Max became the Hugh Hefner of Antar. With his mother’s support and financial backing, Max started a Playboy like magazine for the Antarian man of distinction called Playboy Galaxy Guy. When the call for the first centerfolds were announced, there were lines that went from his front door to the front of the property where his “Boner’s Bungalow” sign is proudly displayed. The magazine became such an intergalactic success that word reached Hef himself who sent an intergalactic Western Union threatening to sue Max if he didn’t cut him in on the profits. Liz moved in and became his dominatrix/accountant. After demonstrating her formidable dual skills to Hef, Liz now heads up Playboy intergalactic.

Zan and Isabel took to being royalty like ducks to water. After the coronation, their feet literally never touched the ground. They float around doing their official duties. Zan had Topolsky shot in order to heal her and make her a part of the monarchy. Zan is happier than he’s ever been in his life, but for some obscure reason the song “ I Shall Survive” goes through his head every time he peers out of the windows of his bedroom.

The gang manages to get together at the palace for official holidays such as Kiss the King’s ass day, national plaid day and kick your kin day.

As fate would have it, the gang all died on the exact day at the exact same time.

Zan was on the throne in his bathroom.
Isabel, Kyle and Tess were at a ribbon cutting ceremony for another hybrid fertility clinic when their numbers came up.
Liz was standing over Max in bed with a huge whip asking him who was his momma when they kicked the bucket.
Michael was playing sexual hokey pokey with himself as Alex and Maria looked on making sure what was stuck out got put right back in when they expired.

They were all spirited away to a place that looked just like that commercial for Philadelphia cream cheese. The atmosphere was bright white with large fluffy clouds everywhere.

Maria scans over her new surroundings then starts to panic, “I don’t think we’re on Antar anymore!”

Kyle shakes his head in frustration. ”Damn it! Our lives are becoming more like that old flick they show on holidays. You know the one with the little people.”

Zan doesn’t hear a word that’s been said. He’s in his own little world. “OMG! Did I die just like Elvis?” Zan asks himself out loud.

As the gang gets their bearings in this new place, a being in white appears. “Hello, I’m Michael the arch angel. My associates and I witnessed the chaos and mayhem you’ve caused over the years. It’s known that first you die then there is judgment. Well ladies and gentlemen, judgment time has arrived.”

Out of the blue, a band of archangels appear. Two stands next to Liz, two stand behind Max and Isabel. One stands next to Alex, one is next to Kyle, one is next to Maria. Michael, Zan and Tess are the only ones standing alone.

“What…what’s going on here? What’s with the heavenly choir here?” Alex asks not knowing what to think.

The archangel Michael begins to explain, “These were your personal angels. Once they were sent to Earth to bear witness of your lives. On Earth they posed as your parents.

Michael isn’t thrilled to know he didn’t warrant an angel, “What are you saying, I didn’t need to be looked after?”

Dean-Archangel of Secrets, who was Jim Valenti in his earthly body. “Son all I can say is this. The day of your births there was an angel strike. When we found that there was no one to witness your life, we decided to watch you in shifts but then we got our hands full with the charges we had. Plus we never had to worry about you having a shoot first and ask questions later kind of demeanor.”

He walked over and put his hands on Michael’s shoulders. “Oh and I wanna apologize for causing problems for you all when I was sheriff, I had to find a way to amuse myself while on earth. I had no sex life, while my earthly son was fucking everything that moved.” He then looked over at Kyle, “Do you know how humiliating it is to get kicked out of your own house by your son like you’re no longer the man of the house? Like I wasn’t pulling my own weight.” Valenti starts to cry.

Kyle points and laughs in the angel’s direction while holding his nuts in defiance.

Zan and Tess look around the room. “I guess we didn’t warrant angels either?” Tess adds.

The angel formerly known as Nancy Parker says. “Contrary to popular belief, angels aren’t perfect. If we were, that cute little show Roswell would still be on the air!”

Max looks around at the angels, “So, is that why we were able to get around without parental supervision all the time?”

The angel formerly known as Jeff Parker speaks, “Yes Max. Another misconception is that archangels actually save people. We simply watch and record.”

The Archangel Michael interrupts the conversation with a microphone in his hand while a mirrored disco ball gently falls down out of the clouds and smoke starts rolling silently in. He starts to sing”

And now the end is here
And you must face the final curtain
My friends the time has come
And there’s a debt you have to pay
You’ve lived a life of bull
You debauched everyday in everyway
This ticket you bought, it’s your own fault
You did it your way!

He passes the microphone from one hand to the other like Wayne Newton then throws it down causing thunderous static to ring throughout the atmosphere.

Then he speaks in a booming voice, “Ok people, its judgment time who will be first?”

Max sticks out his chest and gestures with his hands, “Ok I’ll go first.

What happens next? Don’t miss the final installment of this fun filled trilogy.

Author's Note:So sorry for the delay.
I hope this was more than worth the wait
ENJOY!





When we last left the gang, Max volunteered to be judged first.

A golden seat of judgment slowly rises out of the floor from the middle of the room. Michael the Archangel gestures for Max to sit in that seat.

The angel starts walking around him like he’s Denny Crane in a courtroom. “Max Evans, can you recall anything you’ve ever done to help anyone other than yourself?”

Max falls on his knees in front of the angel as he speaks. “Your angelness sir, everything I’ve ever done has been to bring pleasure to those less fortunate than myself. If I benefited in anyway that was just a happy coincidence.” He blows kisses at all the girls in the room.

The gang breaks out in thunderous applause.

The angel formerly known as Philip Evans replies, “Order, order I say! Mr. Evans do you care to explain your reasoning?”

“With pleasure.” Max starts waking around the room as he explains himself. “Just look at me, I’m beautiful! Why should I waste all this gorgeousness like some self-conscious outsider who needed to hide behind a tree?

He walks over to the girls and gently lifts Liz’s hair from her face. “I know what I got, I got a lot and I spent my life sharing it with whomever was willing to take a little ride on my Ducati.”

He stares down at his crouch lovingly, then walks back to sit unceremoniously in the golden chair.

Isabel is appalled by what her brother just said. “That’s always been my brother’s reasoning for everything.” Isabel walks over to Max shaking her head disapprovingly as she speaks to the crowd.

“I’ve always made it my business to keep a low profile, not go on dates or do anything fun. My brother on the other hand was never happy unless he was the life of the party.”

She turns from addressing crowd to look at Max disapprovingly, “There was no such thing as a Saturday where he wasn’t at someone’s party drinking a forty or wearing the proverbial lampshade from getting too high.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve found joints the size of sausages in his jeans on washday.”

“Admit it Isabel, you’ve always been jealous of Max and the way he drew people to him. It’s not his fault you were too timid to live your life to the fullest.” The angel formerly known as Diane Evans says defending Max.

“Oh don’t go there old lady, I’m pissed off at you anyway.” She turns her steely stare onto Diane. “So were you scheming on how to go Graduate on Alex when you got the chance?”

“Any feelings Alex and I might have felt for each other is strictly in the past young lady!” Diane gestures for Alex to call her as she walks off.

Michael the angel gets the proceedings back on track. “Ok this is not the Evans road show, Max you’re dismissed.” Max gets up from the chair and makes his way back over to the rest standing off to the side. “Who will be next?”

An unsuspecting person rises and pleads the cases of the gang. “Michael I know you feel these people are guilty but of what, living? I had someone I cared very much for.

The man I loved told me that we had no future. He said that we were just too different. For a while I accepted that as fact. I threw my happiness away for what, the acceptable way of life?

I’ve always regretted my decision to stay away from him. If I had my way I would have turned our last twelve days into a lifetime with the man I loved.”

The woman speaking is the angel formerly known as Amy Deluca, the man she speaks of is Nasedo.

Nasedo blows her a kiss and opens his hand. He’s holding a fifth of a carat cubic zirconium just for her. “Sorry hon after leaving Earth’s atmosphere my powers aren’t worth jack shit!”

Amy looks at what Nasedo has in his hand, looks back at him and replies, “Neither are you!” She walks off in a huff; he follows close behind singing “If I had a million dollars.”


Michael the archangel looks like he’s had enough of this kangaroo court. Shaking his head in defeat, “ I didn’t want to do this but since these proceedings have gotten totally out of control, I feel I have to turn this case over to a higher authority.”

He gestures with his hands and the silhouette of a person shrouded in a white radiance hovers close to the gang.

The life form comes closer and the vivid light causes the gang and the angels to fall to their knees and Michael the archangel is the only one not on the floor.

He walks over to the being; he leans into the being as if he’s listening and nods his head. He bows to the being then walks over to the gathering of people with news.

“For reasons beyond of my control, everyone is free to stay here if they wish. The deity has taken pity on you and given you get out of hell cards.” Shrugging his shoulders he continues, “Why I have no idea.”

Then like a flash, the lights go out of the place for a brief moment. When the light returns, the superior authority is seen for who it really is.

It’s none other than Melinda Metz, creator of the world of Roswell. She hovers gracefully to Max and the gang, giving each of them huge hugs.

She kisses them and tells them to live and be well. Then as mysteriously as she appeared she disappears.

Liz walks over to Maria; “Hey for a minute there I thought I saw a tear form in her eye. I wonder why?”

Maria responds to the query, “Hey we’re all her children if that makes sense.”

Liz nods in agreement and puts an arm around her.

Suddenly a smoky haze overtakes the heavenly courtroom and Liz wakes to another day.
She looks over her surroundings, sits up in bed wiping the sleep out of her eyes.
Wow, I had the strangest dream! She thinks to herself.

After giving herself a good stretch, she turns and finds Alex in bed with her. He’s naked under her covers and smoking a blunt.

After she tells him about her dream, he chuckles shaking his head. “Liz, if I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times. Never eat a Will Smith before hitting the hay.”

He leans in and kisses her left cheek and grins.

“Yeah yeah yeah,” Liz laughs while she picks her pink nightshirt off the floor and puts it on.

They share a lighthearted laugh just as Max saunters out of Liz’s bathroom naked. He walks over to the bed and sits on Liz’s side.

She’s wearing a lusty look while rubbing the side of his face, “Hey babe when’s the last time you had a shave.” She nudges him laughing.

Max tweaks her nose then gestures for Alex to hand over the blunt.

Alex pulls the covers back, grabs Liz and starts ravaging her while inviting Max to participate. Just then their party is suddenly disturbed. A voice is heard coming from outside the bedroom.

Her father, Jeff Parker is calling her. “Lizzie, time to get up hon.” He sniffs the air putting a hand on his hips. “Liz what did I tell you about those funny cigarettes?”

Liz’s face takes on a very troubled appearance as Max and Alex start rummaging the room for their clothes.

Amongst all the upheaval Liz’s father enters the room and stands by the bed facing Liz. The guys are helplessly holding their clothes in front of them to hide their nakedness.

“Liz, didn’t I tell you to call me the next time the blunt was being passed around? Hey guys what’s up?” He acknowledges Max and Alex as if they were all standing in the Crashdown fully clothed.

Liz shrugs her shoulders as her father motions to Max that he wants to take a toke of the unlit blunt he shoved in the pocket of his jeans.

Max nods politely at Mr. Parker while passing him the blunt and a lighter.

As we pan out of Liz’s room, we hear her say “ Hey don’t smoke up my shit!”

The blunt burns!
And all’s well in Roswell.

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The End