Wow, thanks for all the positive feedback!
I'm doing naked cartwheels that you guys like it so far!
Deejonaise wrote:There was once a time when I thought pigs would fly through the sky before I wrote fluff and you wrote canon. I guess this means the end is here, lol.
You know... people sure are using that term with me alot, lol! They did it over at RAMS about something else... I can't remember what. I must just inspire pigs flying in people, LOL!
Angel wrote:Well, look at you! Over here writing canon.

I can't wait to see where you go with this, I'm sure it'll be fabulous. So stop your worrying. But you know, if Nick shows up for a brief appearance, I don't think anyone would complain.
So where did Liz go? It seemed as if Michael knew. Interesting. More now!
A HA! So Angel bit the dust, too, on the Nick Gannon front, eh?
Don't worry... there are a lot of other Nick Obsessors out there to keep ya good company. Like uh... me?
He's real, real I say!
begonia9508 wrote:That was so frightening!...... what is happening to Liz? but I love reading something from you in the conventional part... you never wrote about aliens if I'm not mistaken? Dosesn't matter anyway bc the start was terrific!
EVE

Nope, never ventured onto this board, lol! And you'll have to wait and see what's happening to Liz...
alienmom wrote:my licious mistress has ventured to the dark side??

but with your writing abilities, i'm not suprised
i'm so hooked already. just what happened to liz?? and why did it happen?? river dog didn't seem to suprised. he knows way more then he's telling. hopefully you will utilize him more than the writers of the show did. i think he has lots more potential.
waiting quietly chained in the corner like a good minion slave

Since you found this all on your own, Michelle, I'm giving you twenty minutes of unchained freedom. Should you abuse this privilege, it'll be bread crumbs for a week!
Behrsgirl77 wrote:So Linds, I get home from work get online and Sarah Marie tells me...LINSDAY POSTED A NEW FIC! And of course I'm like where...she's like the CC Board...And I'm like

on the CC Board?
Something tells me that conversation was way more interesting than that, lol! And where the HELL is S&M today??! I'm going through withdrawals... need... BILL!
Breathless wrote:Are my eyes deceiving me? Is that Lindsay, posting a canon fic? And an amazing one I might add!
I always thought Liz's hesitation in the Balance was an idea the show dropped the ball on. I guess it was just an excuse to keep Max and Liz apart and nothing more. I'm glad to see you expand on that idea, and can't wait to see where you take it.
Thanks Debbi!
Yeah, I think it's an interesting premise, as well, but credit must go to Dee for thinking it up. I'm just the lowly writer... I don't have the imagination to come up with original plots like that, LOL! Luckily, she trusts me enough to take it wherever I end up... so we shall see! Hope I don't disappoint! And also... um... hope to see you over at LOD soon. You know I can't be totally happy until I have ALL my fave authors posting over there.
sunrise102 wrote:Truly though, all I needed to see was this for me to read it:
Rating: NC-17
J/K!!

Really though, your name is enough to warrant a second look.
Yeah... no worries on that front, huh?
Anais Nin wrote:No matter what you write - CC or AU - you do it with that typical Lindsay-flair that just makes it worth reading.

I hope to be able to read more soon!
Um... how about... now?
Okay, the reason I didn't answer any of your very good questions concerning the fic, is because I want you all to be going, "
" So no spoilers, LOL! If you just have NO idea what's going on, pm me and I'll answer as best as I can.
Onward we go...
<center>
Chapter One</center>
“Are you sure you’re feeling all right?” Maria asked tentatively, nibbling her lower lip as Michael let out a sigh of exasperation.
“I told you, I’m fine,” he snapped in a gruff tone that couldn’t quite hide the wary affection he felt for the petite blonde. “It’s not like I died or anything.”
“Bad joke, Michael,” Max answered, folding his arms across his chest as he glanced down the expanse of the grassy quad. Brow furrowing, he spoke in a soft voice, “Has anyone seen Liz today?”
“You know, I haven’t really seen her since the heal… since that night,” Alex corrected quickly when a group of students walked by within earshot. “I called, but her parents said she was sick.”
“She hasn’t been at work, either,” Maria added. “I didn’t think anything of it at the time, with everything else going on… but it isn’t like Liz.”
“What do you mean?” Isabel asked. “She’s just sick, right? That’s normal enough. Max, you have to stop worrying about every little thing Liz does…” She trailed off with a gasp as something caught her attention across the quad. “Oh, my
God.”
They all turned and saw a figure stumbling through the crowd, hand held to her head. A pair of baggy cords hung from her hips, accented by a battered flannel shirt that had seen better days. Her long dark hair was twisted into a lop-sided ponytail and wisps framed her face as she fell to the ground, knocking a pair of sunglasses from her nose.
“Liz!” Max shouted, attracting attention from surprised students who had never heard the closed-off young man speak, much less raise his voice. He took off running, pushing through the throng as he kneeled beside her, taking her elbow and raising her chin towards him. “Liz, look at me.”
She stared up at him through glassy eyes, blinking dazedly. “Wha…” her voice was thick and husky, completely unlike the normal sweet tone that spilled from her lips. “What happened?”
His blood ran cold as he realized the reason for the glasses. Her eyes were black and swirled in a leering tandem as she gazed at him, her lips parted as unsteady breath left her lungs. “Oh, my God,” he whispered, glancing around at the curious faces of their peers. “We’ve got to get you out of here,” he added softly, helping her to her feet as he shielded her from everyone’s gaze. Grabbing the glasses, he placed them back on her nose, trying not to shiver at the sight of her eyes.
As he half-carried her to where the rest of the group watched in varying degrees of fascination and horror, she began to struggle. “No!” she shrieked, regaining her strength and shoving against him as he stopped to stare at her. “Let me go!”
“Liz… what’s…” His voice drifted off in shock as she turned and fled from him, her hair spilling from its confines and down her back. “Liz!” he cried out, heart pounding as he went after her.
He felt and hand grip his arm, stopping him in his tracks as he spun around to meet Michael’s gaze with fire in his own. “What are you going to do, Maxwell?” he asked, mimicking words from not so long ago as they stared at each other. “If you go after her, it’ll only create a bigger scene.”
Inwardly, he knew Michael was right. But that didn’t keep the blood from pounding in his ears as he replayed the frightened disgust painted on Liz’s face right before she’d taken flight. Swallowing, he looked around and sure enough, he was currently the object of several attentions. He allowed Michael to lead him away as his eyes dropped to the ground.
“What the hell was
that?” Maria screeched upon his arrival, looking ready to run after Liz as well. “What happened?”
“I… I don’t know,” Max answered honestly. “She looked at me like… like she didn’t know who I was.” The final words came out in a hoarse whisper as a sharp pain filled his chest. “Her eyes were…”
“What?” Alex demanded, an expression of concern on his lean face. “What about her eyes? And why are we letting her go off by herself? This is crazy.”
“Alex is right,” Maria decided, taking a step forward, before Michael blocked her path. “Out of my way, Spaceboy,” she snapped, tears filling her eyes. “I’m going after her.”
“No,” Max intoned when Michael opened his mouth to reply, no doubt to cause an argument. “No… let me.” When they all looked at him, he let out a sigh and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “I need to find her myself. Please understand.”
“Max,” Isabel began hesitantly. “Why does it have to be you? I thought… I thought you planned on, you know… taking a step back from the whole Liz thing?”
Maria gasped. “You were going to dump her, just like that?” she hissed. “Why? What has she done wrong to make you doubt her? Why push us away now, after everything that’s happened?” She turned wounded eyes towards Michael, who visibly cringed at what he knew was coming next. “This was all your idea, wasn’t it? God forbid you guys get close to anyone. No, it’s just the three of you… no matter that we were there to save your
ass!”
“Maria, calm down,” Alex murmured, pulling her into his arms as he shot Isabel a disappointed glance. “She’s right, though. You all need to open your eyes and realize… there are six of us now. We put our asses on the line to save Michael, we deserve more than your superiority complexes.”
“Just wait a damn minute,” Michael started. “I never asked for you guys to become involved, did I?”
“Of course not,” Maria snapped hurtfully, turning away. “You never do. So you won’t mind when I take myself and my
human stupidity away from you and find my friend.”
With one last disapproving glance, Alex followed. Max’s jaw tightened as he glared at his sister and best friend. “Thanks so much, both of you,” he murmured.
“I’m sorry,” Isabel whispered, obviously shaken by both of the humans comments. “I didn’t mean…”
“Didn’t you?” Max asked tiredly. “You and Michael have been nothing but against this entire ordeal between Liz and me. Between the humans and
us. The fact remains… we need them, whether either of you like it or choose to accept it. I have.”
“Maxwell, this is bigger than what you think you feel for Liz Parker,” Michael answered in a defensive tone. “Don’t you remember, no attachments?”
“Don’t
you remember?” Max returned angrily. “You were lying there…
dying, Michael! It was Liz who helped figure out how to save you! Maria and Alex joined the circle that helped bring you back. How can you still think of them as attachments?”
“Because that’s what they are,” Isabel broke in softly, not losing her ground as Max spun around to face her. “Michael’s right, Max. We can’t afford to let them in… to let them get too close. If something were to happen to us… if someone were to find out the truth…”
“Don’t think that way,” Max whispered painfully.
“It’s the truth!” she hissed, tears filling her brown gaze. “If something happened to us, it wouldn’t be safe for them, Max. The less they know about anything, the more protected they are.”
“I agree,” Michael added, gentling his tone. “I don’t hate them, Max. I don’t even think that they’re as useless as I did before. But they can’t help us, not really. They’d only get in the way of what’s important.”
“And what’s that?” Max asked bitterly, not bothering to disguise his pain at the words coming from their lips. “Finding where we come from? Haven’t we learned anything, yet? Every time we move closer to something, it all blows up in our faces. Look at how close we came at Atherton’s. And for what? You risked your life at the reservation… what did you see? We’re moving nowhere.”
“That’s not true.”
“Then what? Tell me what you saw,” he pressed on, then inhaled sharply. “No, not here. God, I can’t believe that we’re even
discussing this now… I need to find Liz. Don’t stand in my way.” With that he turned and walked away, ignoring the burning stares piercing his back.
<center>***</center>
Fear. Anger. Betrayal. Pain. Shaking. Shaking… stop the shaking. No. Can’t stop. Must find a way to stop…
Close your eyes and let your mind blank out…
What are you?
You know what I am… do you know what you are?
“No!” she shrieked, tucking her legs up to her chin and rocking against the wall. “I know who I am, I know who I am… I know…”
“Liz?”
She jumped at the hesitant voice, and looked up to see a muscular figure approaching. She scrambled away, hiding within the shadows of the dimly lit band room as he stopped in his tracks and stared at her. “Kyle,” she whispered, recognizing him and letting out a sigh of relief. “Kyle!”
“What are you… whoa!” he cried out in surprise as she leaped to her feet and threw herself at him. Barely catching her, he struggled to breathe as she literally tried to crawl inside of him. “Liz… what the hell…?”
“Can’t stop… the shaking…” her teeth chattered as she pressed her cheek against his, the rough stubble leaving tiny scratches behind on her translucent flesh.
“Shit, Liz, you’re freezing!” Kyle said in shock, pulling her away and holding her by the arms. “What the hell’s the matter with you? Are you sick?”
“Stop… shaking…” she whispered, jerking in his arms and trying to move back towards him. “Need… heat…”
“Okay, you’re definitely freaking me out,” Kyle muttered nervously. “Liz… does Evans know you’re in here? Aren’t you guys like, glued at the hip?”
As if on cue, Max’s voice rang out, hard and unyielding. “I’m right here. Liz, are you all right?”
At the sound of his voice, she jerked again and her eyes went wide. “No!” she whispered, trying to hide behind Kyle as she pointed a shaky finger towards Max. “Stay away!”
Max’s jaw worked and he flinched at the barely restrained fear in her voice. Taking a step forward, he held out a hand and whispered, “Liz… it’s me, Max.”
“Maybe you just better stay there, Max,” Kyle said when Liz made a low sound and clutched at his shoulders. “What the hell did you do to her?”
“I didn’t do anything!” Max hissed defensively, trying not to let her rejection faze him. “She’s sick, can’t you tell? She’s not thinking properly.”
“All the same… just…” Kyle trailed off as Liz stepped out from behind him, a confused expression on her face.
“Kyle?” she frowned, pushing at a few strands of hair that had flown into her eyes. Her face was a wan shade of pale, but her eyes were once again deep and brown. Dark shadows plagued the skin beneath her gaze as she flicked a glance in Max’s direction. “Max… what are you doing here? Why aren’t we in biology? What time is it?” she wondered with a nervous laugh. “How did I get here?”
Kyle and Max exchanged wary glances of worry. “Liz… do you remember what happened in the quad?” Max asked gently, focusing on her perplexed expression. No trace of the hysterical female from seconds before lingered.
“The quad?” Her brow furrowed. “But I haven’t…” She trailed off and stared at Kyle. “Kyle. Would you mind giving Max and I a moment?” she asked softly, not wanting to be rude, but unable to ask the questions she needed so long as he was present.
Kyle simply folded his arms across his chest and pierced her with a dubious stare. “What? Hell no, Liz. You practically attacked me when I came in to fool around with the drums and found you here, hiding. And then when Evans came along… you looked like you were scared for your life. So no, I’m not leaving until I get some fucking answers.”
She gasped. “I… what?”
“Kyle,” Max said roughly. “She’s sick. We went on a camping trip and she came down with the flu, okay? She shouldn’t be here. I’m taking her home. Leave it be.”
“Leave it be?” the other boy snorted. “Hell no, Max. You saw her. That wasn’t some fucking virus. She was scared to death. Just what the hell have you done to her, Max?”
“Kyle!” Liz cried out admonishingly. “Max hasn’t done anything to me! This is… this is
none of your business,” she added softly. “Just… leave.”
Kyle stared at her in shock, then his expression tightened in hurt and anger. “You know what, Liz? I’ve had it with you. Really. You’ve changed so much, I hardly even recognize you anymore. You want to hang out with Max Evans and his psycho friends and… and deal drugs or whatever the hell the secret you guys are keeping is, then be my guest. Next time I won’t bother stopping when I see you huddled behind a fucking drum set.”
He turned and stormed away, knocking Max a half step backwards as their shoulders brushed. The second the door slammed, Liz flinched. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I… I didn’t mean to upset him…”
“What’s going on, Liz?” Max asked softly. “You freaked out. You’ve run away from me twice now, and you looked at me like… like…”
“Like what?” she whispered, her stomach beginning to pitch from the shattered expression in his amber gaze.
“Like you were afraid of me,” he admitted, looking away. “Like you were seeing something else entirely. Like… you were disgusted by me.”
“Max, no!” she murmured, shaking her head forcefully as he blinked rapidly. They both were near tears now, as she took a step in his direction. “I didn’t mean… I don’t even remember…” She trailed off on a sob, falling to her knees and hugging her stomach. “What’s happening to me?” she cried out, tears rolling freely down her cheeks as he stared at her. “I feel so… I can’t think… too many voices…”
“Voices?” Max echoed, walking over to kneel beside her. He ran a hand down her hair as she looked up. Catching a tear with the pad of his thumb he whispered, “What voices?”
“I don’t know,” she cried out in a shaky voice. “I can’t remember! Why can’t I remember, Max?” She laid her head against his chest as he swallowed and held her in his arms.
“We’ll figure it out,” he promised, although he didn’t have a clue what was going on. He only knew that whatever it was, it was hurting Liz and that hurt him as well. “Hey, look at me…” he whispered, bringing her up to meet his gaze.
Their mouths moved closer together, until he lightly brushed his lips across hers, tasting the saltiness of her tears. As always, he melted into her mouth, dragging his hands up and into her hair with a sigh.
She allowed him to deepen the kiss for a moment, before stiffening and wrenching herself away, breath coming fast and heavy as she stared at him with wide eyes.
“What?” he asked in sheer confusion. “Liz… what is it?”
She looked away, unable to meet his gaze as she replied, “Nothing. I’m sorry… I just, I’m very tired. I think I want to go home.” Her voice broke on the last word, and something inside of him broke, as well.
“Okay, Liz… okay,” he pulled her into his arms and began rocking her back and forth. She didn’t pull away, but she didn’t return the embrace, simply stared over his shoulder at an unforseen point in the distance.