Roswellian Kama Sutra (UC/CC/Adult/Slash) A/N 01/28/08[WIP]

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Roswellian Kama Sutra (UC/CC/Adult/Slash) A/N 01/28/08[WIP]

Post by suicide_eagle_rath » Wed May 03, 2006 4:37 pm

Title: Roswellian Kama Sutra

Disclaimer: The characters belong to Melinda Metz, Jason Katims, WB and UPN. They are not mine and no infringement intended. I am only attempting to finish a riveting story from one point of view.

Rating: Adult Slash

Pairings: UC / CC

Summary: Yes you read right: Tthe Roswellian Kama Sutra. Remember that book of destiny where its how who was paired up with whom… well it seems as though some pages were sequester by unknown entity. These pages have just been found and using advance computer aided programs, once again at Las Cruces we have finally after 2 weeks of intense work deciphered those pages. It is a sex manual, plain and simple. Risking being excommunicated by the professional world of archaeology, our scholars are taking a real risk to bring these pages to the public. So sit back and enjoy.
........ :D will update as the "mood" hits me :shock: ...........
Introduction and Background on the Kama Sutra
The mere mention of the word Kama Sutra brings up images of erotic lovemaking, the exotic feel of the Orient, as the participating men and women delicately balancing themselves in acrobatic poses, a sex filled x-rated book for all to enjoy. How many times has a parent’s modern version of the Kama Sutra, showing the positions only in graphic entertaining details, found their way into the hands of excitable young teens, which flip the pages ogling the figures as they engage in their own private sexual exploration?

However, the sexual positions fame that incites these fantasies is not the entire Kama Sutra, but a small portion of an otherwise scholarly if not technical thesis to sexual enjoyment and various sensual pleasures. The book abounds in historical and anthropological accounts that describe in details the customs and lives of ancient India. The Kama Sutra is really more of a self-help manual for young lovers than a porno version of Playboy.

The author, Vatsyayana is a mystery including the exact date of his life although it has been determined from internal evidence of the work that it was written in the Classical Age of India, during the Gupta period between 320-540 A.D. Sir Richard F. Burton’s 1883 translation brought the age of sex as pleasure for men and women to an uptight Victorian aged society and to the imagination of the people.

Vatsyayana deals with the adult subject matter of human sexuality in a frank and forthright manner, reminds one of a modern day Dr. Ruth. The whole scholarly, yes even practical characteristic style of the Kama Sutra is far removed from the type of erotica written today. Yes, believe it or not, much of the book is a fascinating look into the historical and anthropological insights into a culture and to human sexuality, excruciating boring details attempts to document every type of kiss, embrace, and my favorite the various combinations possible from the different sizes of sexual parts (think about that one folks). For those who are adventurous it does say how to sneak into a harem or if you are in the entertainment field how to keep your clients happy. In addition, of course for those who have unhappy marriages the section on how to have an affair is a must.

So where does this leave us, in Roswell land with the recently discovered Roswellian Kama Sutra.

Did the translators who spent the last few weeks in solidarity confinement the basement at Las Cruces determine it was a sex rampaged Penthouse issue smut filled magazine, one of the shape shifters brought along for his personal enjoyment?

Or did the scholars determine it to be a boring thesis on human alien sexuality?

Well time will tell as the Roswellian Kama Sutra is made public one shocking page at a time

… will it forgo all the scholarly stuff and get straight to the sexual positions, who does what, where, when, and how does that go part WHERE?

Or will this be a boring discussion on the cultural attributes of Antar?

Guess you will have to stayed tuned to see
Last edited by suicide_eagle_rath on Mon Jan 28, 2008 11:43 pm, edited 68 times in total.

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Post by suicide_eagle_rath » Thu May 04, 2006 1:03 pm

<center> ~ Conversation 1 ~ </center>

“SHIT! Michael get over here now!”

“What is it Fearless Leader?”

“Stop the Fearless Leader crap and get in here.”

“Wait Maxie, sex later. I am in the middle of grilling lunch.”

“Put your stomach on hold. This is important get in there now.”

“Okay what is it?”


“Come on Max there is nothing on that net that you or I have not done in one lifetime or another.”

“Michael Look!”

“Damn! More pages to the Book of Destiny…... Shit it is a sex manual… I protest why does someone else have it and not us.”

“Michael think! Someone else has our pages to our book, decoded it, and it posting it on the net.”

“I can take care of that little problem. I will kill ‘em.”


“Who is this turd anyways, hmmmm a suicide_eagle_rath sounds like a flake to me. Should be easy to get rid of the little prick. Matris futuor”

“Matris futuor.. been on the Latin sites again huh Michael”

“You know Max, Stercus accidit. Anyways I am gonna to kill the frickin bastard.”

“Michael! You can’t go around killing humans, it will look suspicious. Plus you do not know if it is a male or a female.”

“So what! Male or female I will eliminate the good for nothing geek.”

“Michel! Suspicion! Does that word sound familiar?”

“What Max more suspicious than our life already spread across the TV in that campy show and now all the fan fiction depicting us in one version or another? Shit I have been with you more than Maria in some of those stories.”

“Yeah, but you got to agree it was a blast watching the show, I think Jason Behr portrayed me rather well.”

“Yeah you and Liz sitting in a tree…. K I S S I N G… hey watch the hair with that pillow.”

“Ever read the Kama Sutra Michael?”

“No Hank was more of a Hustler type. Use to leave them lying around. By the time I was ten, knew everything.”

“Wow, how come you never let me in on the info. I found Dad’s playboy under the mattress one day.”

“Whoa Mr. E had a secret huh. Cool did not think the old guy had it in him.”

“Says here it tells how to get into a harem…ever sneak into the Royal Harem Michael as Rath?”

“No Max you forget I was raised away from the Palace, at least according to that kooky writer.”

“Oh right.”

“Did you?”

“A few times. Watched what went on and then one day I got caught?”

“Really! What happened?”

“Lost my virginity as Zan, several times over”

“Hot DAMN”

“Michael, says here one page at a time is to be posted. What do you think it is? Cultural anthropological thesis or Penthouse.”

“Whoa baby it better be Penthouse. I need some new ideas to get down and dirty with.”

“Uh Michael what is that smell?”

“Shit the burgers.. well there goes our lunch Max.”

“Put out the fire and let’s go out to eat.”

“Course Max we also could stay in and put some of the Kama Sutra knowledge to work.”

“Can’t Michael those pages are not posted yet.”

“Damn that means we have to wait.”


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Post by suicide_eagle_rath » Sun May 07, 2006 4:01 am

(Cover Plate)

<center> The Perfumed Garden of Sensual Delights
As Translated from the Antarian

Dr. Claymore Helmer
Dr. Jason Alexander
Dr. Henrich Schmidt

May 2006

<center>~~~~~~~~~~~~~next page~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ </center>

Translator’s note

To the Reader: the following translation is from an ancient text that arrived on Earth around 1950 from a distant Planet by the name of Antar. Two weeks ago, 14 metal plates were discovered in a sealed case underneath a section of the Roswell Library that was being torn down for remolding. I, Dr. Helmer, was called in immediately as my area of expertise in Astro-Archaelology is well known among the academic community that deals in alien artifacts. How these plates ended up in a false retaining wall, is still a mystery that as yet to be uncovered.

After noting the condition of the plates and the possibility of translating the data located within, I contacted Dr. Alexander an expert in Alien Lexicology and Dr. Schmidt, an expert in Alien Religious Studies. Both men are well known in their fields with extensive research into various alien worlds and languages as well as being the authors of several academically acclaimed books on the above subject.

I have endeavored to reproduce Antarian Laconism, phonetics, and dialects as close to the original as possible in separate version in which I will make available to any appropriate scholar through the proper channels. My private version also has several different interpretations of the many paronomasias and rhymes of similar sounding words. In addition, a transliteration is also available.

For the purpose of this disclosure, my colleges ad myself have agreed upon the following translation as being the most representative of the Royal Race of Antar in regards to the sexual, cultural and historical attributes regulating behavior, expectations, fulfillment, and desires.

The translated pages are being disclosed one at a time as the fervor of the moment limits us to this tactic. These pages will be made available to the public on the net so that the world may examine this invaluable piece of literary, anthropological, and historical records of a very private and reclusive branch of the Antarian people known as the Royals.

Let me conclude these short prefatory remarks with some words of common sense too heighten your reading awareness. When reading this little addendum to the Book of Destiny you may want to have at your disposal a cold glass of ice water and a fan, as well as a willing partner.

Dr. Claymore Helmer

<center>~~~~~~~~~~~~~next page~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</center>


<center>To The
King of Antar
His Most Supreme
Imperial Majesty

In your name:

Handed down from the beginning of time, from the hands of the ancients themselves, the instructions, guides, and regulations for attaining sexual favor, gratification and enhancement as it the due right of those born to the Royal Race.

Your Majesty, I humbly present for your Royal and gracious acceptance, this edition that has been transcribed word for word from the ancient Royal Tongue for the pleasure of you, my King the Good and Gracious, and a Lover of Knowledge.

Your Majesty has always supported the libraries of Antar and the archival duties of the Masters who strive to preserve the old ways burned onto the pages of life. You, my most gracious King, as Royal Patron of Education, Arts and the Sciences I humbly ask you to favor and promote the ascertainment knowledge through the improvement of Antar’s literately body.

My King, may Your Majesty may you be blessed with a long and prosperous reign , enjoy the blessings of Immortality as a Majestic King of Antar.

<center>Your Majesty’s
Most Humble and most Obedient Subject
Master Marthane </center>

<center>~~~~~~~~~~~~~next page~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</center>

Table of Contents

Part I:
Concerning Observations Useful for One to Know About n Regards to Males and Females

Part II:
Concerning the Acquisition of a Wife

Part III:
Concerning the Duties of a Royal Husband to His Wives, and Their Duties to Him and Each Other

Part IV:
Concerning the Attributes of the Royal Harem and the Complexity of Affairs

Part V:
Concerning Sexual Gratification, Positions, and Variances in All That is Pleasurable

Part VI:
Prescriptions: For Increasing the Dimensions of Small Members and Increasing Enjoyment[

<center>~~~~~~~~~~~~~next page~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ </center>

Last edited by suicide_eagle_rath on Sun May 07, 2006 2:32 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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Post by suicide_eagle_rath » Mon May 08, 2006 12:26 am

<center> ~ Conversation 2 ~ </center>

“Hey Max, can you hear me? There is a new posting.”


“Get out of the shower! There is another posting on that Kama Sutra sex book.”

“Sex! Where!”

“Max you are dripping all over the bed and the laptop. “

“Sorry you said to hurry. Thought it was something important, you know skins.”

“Yeah Maxwell, the words you used were: SEX!! WHERE!!”

“Okay, okay so what new details are there?”

“Well it looks like the pages were found two weeks go in a false retaining wall in the basement of the Roswell library.”

“Library? That is where Tess recovered the book from, but she took it out of a wall upstairs.”

“Yeah there it appears someone put the pages there… ummm Nasedo or Tess? Which of our two favorite traitors shall we pick?”

“Dose it matter at this point Michael? Anyway, the pages are already found and deciphered. So what do they say?”

“Hey quit shaking your hair like some dog, you are getting water everywhere.”


“It says that three geeks have translated the pages from the original ancient Antarian. Get this Max, one claims to be an Astro-Archaeologist. Now what in the hell is that?”

“Don’t know Michael, guess you can get a degree in anything anymore, just look at he websites. So are they posting the actual pages yet?”

“No the little fucker is teasing everyone. Asshole. But there is a message to you.”

“Really! Move over, Michael.”

“Max you are still wet.”

“Never bothered you before.”

“Hey guys! How’s it going? Interrupting anything?”

“Hey Kyle! No Max is just reading about Antarian Sex and how to get off.”

“Really let me in.”

“Okay this bed is just way to small, you and Kyle have fun reading the how to book, Max. I already know how to and do just fine.”

“So what are we reading Max.”

“It is an Antarian sex manual they are posting on the web.”

“Really! Wow! Is Antarian sex different that regular sex?”

“Yeah better, right Max.”

“Hey Michael did you read the comments left by people.”

“Yeah, Max someone wants illustrations. Another wants to play in the clay with that fucked up Dr. Helmer, the Ass-archaeologist.”

“Illustrations? Now you are talking!! I agree with illustrations.”

“Calm down Kyle you will bounce Max off the bed.”

“So tell me Max, Michael, are Antarians built the same as humans? Okay stop laughing, come on you guys I am serious here. Are the women parts in the same places? I gather my question is funny considering you two are rolling on the floor laughing like space hyenas.”

“Sorry man, we are the same, basically, except for few minor peculiarities.”

“Peculiarities Max?”

“Kyle if you get lucky enough to have sex with an Antarian male or female I will let you let you in on a few secrets.”

“Hey Max we could give Kyle an actual demonstration, or some hands on training.”



“Hey!! I like this one who wrote, there is a picture of Nick who so eloquently portrayed me in the show. If I do say so myself, it is like looking in the mirror. Damn good-looking guy, talk about abs and a chest.”

“God Kyle you are self-absorbed, thought Buddha whapped that out of you.”

“No, Michael just stating the obvious.”

“Well I am going to get dressed. Be back in a few.”

“Trying to sneak a peek there Kyle?”

“Hey no man, just adjusting my eyes to read the title of the last chapter listed.”


“Well did you read it Michael?”

“No, let me see move over. Damn! Can they can do that without alien powers.”

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Post by suicide_eagle_rath » Wed May 10, 2006 10:45 am

<center>Part I:

Concerning Observations Useful
for One to Know About in Regards to Males and Females

1)....A)Those Things In Males That Are Pleasurable To Others
............a)Description of Favorable Males
............b)The Use of Perfumes and Sexual Scents
............c)Perfection of Length
........B) Those Things In Males That Are Displeasing To Others
........C) The Importance Of The Male Member

2).....A)Those Things In Females That Are Pleasurable To Others
............a)Description of Favorable Females
.................i) Among Common Classes
.................ii) Among Royal Classes
............b)The Use of Perfumes and Sexual Scents
.........B) Those Things In Females That Are Displeasing To Others
.........C) Desirability of Males

3) Those things in regards to the arts and sciences that should be studied in order to achieve maximum results

4) Those things that make the art of the sexual act pleasing in the wake of the aftermath


1A) Those Things In Males That Are Pleasurable To Others

a) Description of Favorable Males

The man, who seeks favor with his confident or a wife, is one who is anxious to please one or the other, to create the atmosphere contingent to romantic episodes. The male must be of good nature, a fine physical specimen, eyes clear with radiance, true and faithful in his actions, eloquent in his speech, intelligent, and he must enslave himself to his word, to be faithful to the spoken voice. He must be strong, virile, and knowledgeable in the arts of love.

b) The Use of Perfumes and Sexual Scents

Perfumes and sexual scents used aphrodisiac by males as well as by the female of the species have been proven by scientific means to excite the act of intercourse and to increase the movements, duration and intense pleasure derived from copulation.

Both males and females upon inhaling the fragrant flowers, herbs, and resins become intoxicated, enhancing the erotic feeling, intensifying the nervous systems making each touch, each lick, each kiss a pleasure resounding in itself a myriad if time over.

Especially noted are the herbs of the desert areas and the white night flowers.

c) Perfection of Length

The male member must be virile in all respects in order to please his lover, wife or confident. Desirable dimensions must be at held at a maximum the length the breadth of twelve fingers (1), the equivalent of three handbreadths (2) and at least six fingers (the equivalent of one and a half handbreadth). An Antarian male whose member is of fewer dimensions cannot effectively please his intended.

Here it is important to remind the Antarian male of the ancient story of Gradna and how his fortune depended upon the length of his member.
  • In the ancient days, before the reign of Thardan, there lived a man, Gradna, whose member size was quite small in accordance with his personal bank account, which was equally as small. His wife was very vocal, was not pleased at all with his performance, and complained to her friends.

    The husband feeling very dejected went to see a healer to see if his situation could be rectified. The healer was able to prescribe a medication (3) which grew his member large and thick, as was none before.

    His wife was so pleased her, that she began speaking of them to her friends. From that, the stories grew as his member did, known throughout Antar for his sexual appetite and adventurous activities. The couple became famous throughout Antar and very wealthy.
1B) Those Things In Males That Are Displeasing To Others

Qualities like these below among others are not recommendations for women or males seeking companionship, bonding, or marriage.

Males who goes about sexual intercourse as if it is duty rather than enjoyment gives no pleasure to his counterpart, will only result in their lovers turning away from him.

Males who lay down with their lover, wives, or confidents, with no thought to preparation (4) are perceived as degenerates.

Males who do not kiss, caress, or intertwine themselves around their counterpart but finish in haste without thought to their lover is are not appreciated. (5)

Males (6) who finish their sexual experience long before their companion has begun to long for fulfillment are not appreciated nor wanted as lover.

Males who discuss affairs with various partners and taunt this in front of their spouse, bonded lover, or confident are bastards. (7)

Males who speak falsehoods, lie, cheat, and do not keep their word as their bond are also to be ignored as potential.

1C) The Importance Of The Male Member

When a man, who conducted his life meritoriously should find that when he is in the accompaniment of a potential partner, his body would react with his member rise and stiffen. He should take careful note not to come to culmination too quickly, and once done he should be able to react the events again.

This man is then regarded high in the eyes and feelings of his wife, bonded lover, or confident. A male who is of the appropriate size for his partners will find that he fills the appropriate area completely with little room left over. As it is said by the poet Jarhan from the Kingdom of Kandahar in the reign of Pyrrhic:

<center> Males they say are sought, stalked in hunting
From those young in body and mind
Qualities of firmness, minds enduring, voices soft
Strength, virility they do entertain, pleasure to seek
Members who fill their void, speak with vigor
Broad chest that heaves with breath, lips full
Enjoinment in arms, time never ending
Once floating, the feeling shudders
Once again to the plane of reality crash
Only to begin a new
This is what they are stalked for
( 8 )</center>


1) A small unit of linear measurement equal to approximately three-quarters of an inch.

2) A linear measurement approximating the width of the palm of the hand: 2 to 4 inches

3) see chapter 6 for details on preparing

4 i.e. foreplay

5) ) i.e. Slam, Bam, Thank You Ma'am

6) The Antarian word for this is sekhet, which in essence mean castration. The meaning in this text is unclear; unless that is the punishment for males who conduct themselves on a regular basis in this manner.

7) The Antarian word is “maswer” I bastard is the closest word in English to fit the concept.

8 ) Antarian poetry was difficult to translate, the images are vague and structure seems to be non-existent. For a copy of the original poem in readable Antarian please refer to the Antarian transliterated version.

~~~~ PAGE 1 ~~~~~
Last edited by suicide_eagle_rath on Thu May 18, 2006 9:16 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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Post by suicide_eagle_rath » Thu May 11, 2006 6:48 pm

<center> ~ Comment 1 ~ </center>

Antarian Sex Manual? This has to be some kind of female propaganda dreamed up to make us males look like crap in bed. Have you I am DAMN GOOD, no I am FRICKIN' GREAT . Image

Aliens? This is a lot of bull… Get real and face reality you bunch of fucked up alien hunting chicken-fucking, latex-sniffing, jerks….There are no such things are aliens…they are a myth … what a load of crap. Image

Hey you bunch of fuck-brained warthead experts in supposed fake alien languages each one of you can “globos meos lambe!!!!” Image

Dr. Love
PhD in Sex therapy

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Post by suicide_eagle_rath » Sat May 13, 2006 1:43 am

<center> ~ Conversation 3 ~ </center>

“Hey Michael come here?”

“Yeah Max?’

“Have you been on the net posing as Dr. Love?”

“Who me! Nah why?”

“Seems as though a Dr. Love left a very nasty message in response to the Antarian Sex Manual.”


“Yeah he is in lots of trouble for bashing, that type of behavior is not looked upon kindly.”

“Oh, what about the fuck-brained warthead experts exploiting our lives all over the net. Saying that Antarian men are bastards and such. Hey I am a damn good lover right?”

“Michael! So it was you!”

“Oh really Max, wow you are sharp. Well they should not be posting things like that on the net.”

“Hitting a nerve there Michael? Anything you want to spill?”

“Fuck no, it is our manual we should have it. Plus they will make people think aliens really exist.”

“Aliens do exist Michael. No more sending in comments. Okay.”

“Sure fearless leader anything you say.”

“Michael I am serious we need to lay low. What if the FBI traces the IP and locates us.”

‘Well look at what he said, called us bastards.”

“Michael he did not call us bastards, the translation says Antarian males who do not satisfy their partners and are selfish are basically bastards.”


“Something I should know about. Having a little trouble there with Maria or is it Isabel?”

“Too much info Max.”

“Well it not us. Is it? Thought we were okay?”

“Come on Max you know we are okay. It is just that … well what if the girls see the manual they will want me to do all sorts of things.”

“Like WHAT Michael? Thought you enjoyed doing “things?” A least you seemed to enjoy it.”

“Funny there Max. You know what I mean, romantic crap.”

“Oh that‘s what bothering you.”

“Hey you guys, the game is about to start. Are you coming?”

“Sure Kyle we will be right there. Come on Michael, don’t worry. Maria and Isabel know you too well, just like I do. You have it inside you to be romantic; you just need to let it surface more often.”

“Guys the game started”

“Coming. Michael no more postings.”

“Right. Okay. Sure. All I have to say Max is the part about women had better have some vindication for us males.”


“Psssst Liz come here. Liz Psssst”

“What is it Maria?”

“Shhh…. Come here girl you have got to see this.”

“See What?”

“Let’s go out here.”

“Maria what is it?”

“Girl you are not going to believe what I found on the net.”


“Seems as though there is an Antarian version of the Kama Sutra.”

“What? Let me see.”

“Yeah can you believe this Liz, the manual was in the basement of the library,”

“Wow they translated it. Look Maria look at the chapter titles. Oh my word.

‘They are posting the pages one at a time.”

“Where are the illustrations?”

“Could not find any. Guess Antarians are not into art.”

“Have to agree with the description of males, what they look like and mannerisms. I think Max fits into that scenario.”

“Yeah I guess my non-romantic bell ringer also fits. He does have his days.”

“Trouble in Michael-land?”

“No just wish he could be a little more attentive, maybe remember special occasions.”

“So how is working between the three of you. Must be weird you married to Michael and him to Isabel through Rath.”

“No more weirder than him and Max. Right?”


“But it has been hard, Isabel and I are trying to keep level heads, and cooperate. It is different, very different.”

“Ever going to let me in on what goes on between you three?”

“Maybe someday,… hey what the…. sections about MULTIPLE wives and harems? What the hell? Oh I am going to fry his little Antarian ass if he thinks he can have any other women.”

“That goes for Max also, king or no king. Wonder when that section comes… Oh my word look at the last chapter. They can make it larger?”

Where...oooo….wow…. that I defiantly want to read. How are your cooking skills Liz? Feel like brewing up some “trouble” later on when we reach prescriptions?”

“Yeah that would be …. Hey Maria did you read this section. 'Perfection of Length’ there are dimensions.”

“No, WHAT did you say?”

“The perfect size of the guy’s member.”

“Cock, penis get it right Parker, member is for a club. So what is the right sizes?”

“Well the maximum here is 3 handbreadths which according to the note one handbreadth is between 2 and 4 inches.”

“Okay so that is between 6 to 12 inches, they must mean the 12 inches.”

“WOW… minimum is 1 and a half so that would be 6 inches.”

“Well Liz does Max fit within that dimension?”

“Yeah! Michael?”

“O yeah!”

(Peals of laugher and screaming giggles)

“Hey you girls alright we could here you screaming and laughing.”

“Yeah Kyle everything is alright.”

“Okay just checking. What are you reading?”

“Nothing just reading some Peanuts cartoons online.”

“Peanuts? Okay ... I am going now.”

“Peanuts Liz?”

“That was thinly thing I could think of.”

“Oh my god I have not laughed so much in along while… Liz look! The word for castration for males who are fast little bunnies.

“Maria what are you doing?”

“Printing out the pages so I can refer to them later.”

“When later?”

“Oh you know during certain times where Michael is in a rush say we say.”

“You mean Dr. Love.”


“Dr. Love, PhD in sex therapy, right here, look!”

“Oh that little Antarian turd ... Say it is time that we teach Dr. Love a lesson.”

“What are you going to do Maria?”

“Oh that has to be a plan Liz, a well thought out plan of attack. Dr. Love's wife will need to speak out."

“I am so glad my Max does not do things like that. He is much more level headed and would never read such a book like that.”


“So Max what was the installment today anything good?”

“No Kyle just some boring scientific garbage. The really good sex material is later.”

“Yeah Max is waiting for the positions to try them out.”

“You are kidding right, there are positions described. Illustrations?”

“Kyle calm down you will hyperventilate. Think you had never had sex before.”

“Well so sorry Dr. Love expert in sex therapy but I do not get as much sex as you two get.”

“Jealous there Kyle, a little frustrated maybe? After all I am DAMN GOOD, maybe you need a demonstration on just how good I am.”


“Max!!!! Sorry Kyle fearless leader here is touchy about whom I fuck, right Max.”


“What!!! Only speaking the truth Max, only the truth.”

“So exactly what do you and Michael do, Max? I mean how do you do it, the Antarian way of course.”

“Don’t know Kyle those pages have not been released.”

Last edited by suicide_eagle_rath on Tue May 30, 2006 1:01 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Post by suicide_eagle_rath » Tue May 16, 2006 1:33 pm

<center> ~ Email Reply Reaction Advertise Result 1 ~ </center>


Date: Tue, 16 May 2006 15:33:38 -0500 (EST)
From: Henrich Schmidt " <hjschmidt>

Yahoo! DomainKeys has confirmed that this message was sent by

Subject: Page 23

To: "Claymore Helmer " <C_Helmer>


Reconsidering page 23 in regards to the translation of the word “sidim” may be incorrect. In attempting to visually recreate this position, the translated word “sidim” as “ear” proves to be an impossibility for sexual gratification. Unless of course we have made a calculated error in how “alien” these Antarians are, thus the ear then may be a sexual orifice.

It may be advisory to acquire an artist for the purpose of visual graphs of the various sexual positions. It does help in the placement of the parts mentioned in the text.

Regards Henry



Date: Tue, 16 May 2006 10:15:53 -0700 (MST)

From: "Claymore Helmer " <C_Helmer>

Subject: Re: Page 23

To: "Henrich Schmidt " <hjschmidt>

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I will take under advisement the word “sidim” and study on that further. I agree that unless the anatomy of the Antarian female is contrary to our knowledge data, that this word may be incorrectly translated.

As for procurement of an artist, you may advertise for one keeping in mind that there is no budget at the present time for compensation. If one wishes to come forward for the sake of scientific study then so be it.

Do keep up the visually experiments, they do seem to weed out any problems we may have overlooked in translations.




“Michael what are you doing?”

“Nothing Isabel just trying to get a closer look at your ear.”

“Michael that tickles.”

“Baby here lay back, enjoy, let's have some fun.”

“What are you doing? Stop it.”

“Come on Isabel it is an experiment.”

“Experiment! Michael sometimes you are a little kinky but this is downright weird.”

“Isabel don’t leave, oh come on I was just joking Isabel. Don’t get dressed. Damn.”



Temporary Appointment
Ref No: R2801

This is a scientific research position being established for an artist to illustration translation materials into visual stimuli. Your role includes the responsibility of preparing and submitting work on a timely basis with little or no supervision. You will be required to illustrate certain sexual position based on translation of an alien literary work.

We require a skilled artist who excels in illustrating male and female forms in high details and is creative enough to think in non-human terms if so be required.

Salary range: no salary has been allocated for this position.

Application procedure: Send sample of work with resume quoting the appropriate Ref No. addressed to:

Dr. Henrich Schmidt
University of New Mexico
Las Cruces, New Mexico 88001



“Hey Michael how’s it going?”

“Oh Okay Max.”

“Isabel looked a little miffed, anything happen between you two?’

“No Max, she just wasn’t into experimentation today.”

“Oh, so no definite word on the ear thing.”

“Nope Max it is still a mystery,”

“So what are you drawing?”


“Those are a little explicate, are they not Michael.”

“Yeah “

“So why are you drawing naked people in erotic positions?”

“A job application.”

“Oh .. what …A JOB!!!!!!”
Last edited by suicide_eagle_rath on Tue May 30, 2006 1:02 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Post by suicide_eagle_rath » Thu May 18, 2006 10:11 pm

<center>Part I: Continue </center>

2A) Those Things In Females That Are Pleasurable To Others

a) Description of Favorable Females

i) Among Common Classes

The female who seeks enjoyment with a male is one who is willing to please, does seek to create an ambiance of desire and sensuality. The female must of good disposition, a beauty to the eye of her beholder, faithful to the meaning of love, true in her voice, kind in her actions. She must be a potential mother (1) and lover to whom she chooses as her mate.

ii) Among Royal Classes

The woman that sets to be the wife of a royal (2) must be the epitome of perfection. She must embody the paragon of womanhood, demure in actions, intelligent in thought, soft in spoken voice, artistic in ability, calm and patient in temperament.

She must be vivacious, well educated in the social graces, cultivate recherché topics that are interesting and desired by the nobility. She is not treacherous, nor entices people and has no faults to hide. She takes nothing from anyone, thus not to be indebted to unless specifically receives permission from her lord. She does not surrender her body to any other man or woman, even if abstinence would kill her

She must be the demiurge, the forced behind the power that creates order, peace, and beauty from chaos. She represents the house to which she has married into and serves at all functions as a representative of that house, lineage, and principality or kingdom.

b) The Use of Perfumes and Sexual Scents

As with the males, perfumes and sexual scents are also used as aphrodisiacs. These scents species have been proven by scientific means to prove pleasure to the male senesces propelling them into the act of intercourse and to increase the movements, duration and intense pleasure derived from copulation.

The females may also find additional benefit in using various herbs and flowers in a ritual bath, meant to both clean the body as well as sooth and impassion the mind and soul. Especially noted are the herbs of the desert areas and the white night flowers. (3)

2B) Those Things In Females That Are Displeasing To Others

Females that are always gaming and jesting with strangers are to advise against taking as mates.

Females that are always meddling with matters or in affairs of others that are no concern of hers or her husbands are to be avoided.

Females who join in with other women against her husband or illicit other women to cause trouble against her husband must be avoided at all cost.

Females that are fond of tittle-tattle and unable to keep her husband's secrets are not to be trusted.

Females that are malicious, telling lies, failing to keep her word is to be avoided.

Females that are known for having sexual intercourse with those she is not married to or bonded to are not to be trusted nor their children to be of lineage material.

Females who when requested by their bonded loves or husbands to engage in sexual activities and refuse on a continual basis are considered displeasing to the male eyes.

2C) Desirability of Males

The desirability of males is high on Antar, with those males of Kandahar being especially preferred as husbands and lovers. The following poem was written during the reign of King Prythric, one of the last monarchs in the Kandahar line of succession. This poem credited as the creation of Ranteri, poet laureate of her day. (4)

<center> I prefer a young male for sex, only young
For youth is full of courage stamina
My sole ambition, my lover’s dream
His member is strong, unyielding
Richly proportioned in size and dimension
The head emblazed with passion
For there is nothing like it in creation
Straight and tall, an immalleable shaft
The bow stretch taut, is always ready for action
Never to rest, to lie down, to sleep
My lover’s member, tall and proud seeks no ally
Virile and stately, it asks for no assistance
When fatigue, it pressures forth, duty calls
In the battlefield it never waivers,
In the valence of its actions

My body sings forth drawing him near, inwards
Full of life, no regrets as he plummets downward
Head first into the darkness, his bravery unmasked
Constant in movement, back and forth side to side
Speed variation he engages; slow, fast, never the same
Vigorous in demand, the pressure builds, mounting
He rubs the sides, the very core to my womb
He seeks to please with kisses of fire
My breasts stand erect, my belly quivering
Marks I endure, love, succulent bites (5), sweet nectar (6)
I become lifeless in his embrace,
Swooned by the rapture as the end draws near
Shaking limbs, as tears from him fall within
My body accepts this gift as it does food

My lover’s member is welcomed into me
He lights my eyes, fire burning within
My young man (7) fills me with his virility
My soul feeds on his vigor
Yet it must end as he pulls away
Kisses and embraces during those nights.


1) Exactly how the female Antarian reproduces is still being debated, although some form of an egg being projected from the body does seem the most viable.

2) Additional information on royal marriages can be founds in the section marked “Concerning the Acquisition of a Wife”

3) a research team has been dispatched to determine if any of the debris from the 1947 crash near Roswell contains any alien spores or plant DNA fragments which can be determine in references to before mentioned herbs and flowers

4) Ranteri appears to be a rarity a woman who claims the title of poet laureate. She is the author of several poems involving virile young men at her beckon call to sexual satisfy her.

5) The Antarian word for bite is derived from the root “nbty” meaning to consume. This does bring into question the drinking o blood, is this symbolic or remissness of a ritual sexual act.

6) The Antarian word used for nectar (nasiwot) is slang for the word blood. Originally, this was translated as semen, but upon closer inspection, my colleagues and I determined that notion in reference to the biting and drawing of blood rather than the sucking motion used on a cock to draw out the semen.

7) At this time it is impossible to determine the age of Ranteri although it is speculated she is a mature woman due to her court appointment and terminology used.

~~~~ PAGE 2 ~~~~~

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Post by suicide_eagle_rath » Mon May 22, 2006 2:23 pm

<center> ~ Comment 3 ~ </center>

This is a warning to Dr. Love from Mrs. Love.

Knock off the Lordship crap or you will be sleeping in the dog’s house for the next year.

Master, my Aunt Fanny, bullshit, you insensitive little snot nose boy, just wait until I get off work and get home. Image