If only... (AU, CC, Teen/Mature) COMPLETE

Finished stories set in an alternate universe to that introduced in the show, or which alter events from the show significantly, but which include the Roswell characters. Aliens play a role in these fics. All complete stories on the main AU with Aliens board will eventually be moved here.

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If only... (AU, CC, Teen/Mature) COMPLETE

Post by KatnotKath » Fri Apr 07, 2006 12:37 pm

Story Title: If Only…
Author: KatnotKath
Rating : TEEN/MATURE (just for one scene)
Couple: CC
Disclaimer: The characters of "Roswell" belong to Jason Katims, Melinda Metz, WB, and UPN. They are not mine and no infringement is intended.
Summary: A certain someone’s thoughts about her life and what’s happening in it… I’d give you more, but it’s only short, and I don’t want to spoil it…


Authors Note: Yes, I know I have three stories on the board already, but this came out of my boredom while I was trying to work on some stuff for uni, and it’s practically finished already I promise… I also want to thank Lazza and Allyse for looking over this for me :), along with those who fbed to me on 'write on' in the preview section.

Anyway, here's the prologue, love to hear what you think.



"Abigail, come on sweetie, please don't fuss, mommy really needs to get to class..." I drop a kiss on top of the head of my one year old daughter as I grab my bag and make ready to hand her over to my mom.

She laughs and giggles, probably not really understanding what I'm saying as yet and clings to my shirt. Boosting her further up my hip, I swing my bag onto my other shoulder and then grab my coat with free hand as we hurry out of the room.

Mom's waiting downstairs with open arms, and reaches to take Abby from me. "Alright, say goodbye to momma..." She tells her softly as I try to pry her deceptively strong hands away from my shirt. "I'll see you later sweetheart...love you..." As mom settles my little girl on her hip, I smile and blow a kiss towards her. "Be good for grandma okay baby...?" My gaze lingers on her a few moments longer, and then I force myself to pull away. "See you later mom..."

She nods and smiles. "Have a good day honey..." She uses her hand to wave the tiny one of my small daughter.

Without further words, I head towards the door which leads out onto the back and hurry down the steps onto the road, setting a quick pace as I walk down the street.


I look around.

Oh yeah, that's me, sorry, I guess I didn't introduce myself, I'm Liz Parker...

"Liz, do you want a lift?" The jeep pulls up next to me, and I find myself looking into the face of Max Evans. Tess is in the passenger seat, and his sister Isabel is in the back. I hesitate before answering.

"Come on Liz, there's plenty of space you know..." He assures me with a small smile, gesturing to the other side of the back seat.

After a moment's more hesitation, I nod quickly before I rethink and change my mind. Afterall, it's only a lift, and if I don't accept, I'm going to be late for school. "Okay...thanks..." I murmur softly, giving an awkward smile as I climb in and Isabel moves to one side.

Max pulls away from the curb as I sit down, and I lean back, rocking my head back and letting out a tired sigh.


That's Tess, she has this wonderful talent for stating the obvious it seems...

I count to five, resisting the urge to roll my eyes and simply nod, forcing one of those smiles I give to annoying customers at the Crashdown. "Yeah... Abby was up late last night...and then early this morning..." I comment, and while it might sound like I am, I must point out that I'm not complaining about it... I never complain about my daughter, she's the best thing in my life by far.

Since we're stopped at some lights, Max looks back at me as I say this, his eyes full of questioning and sympathy. "I thought she slept through nowadays...?"

Sighing, I shake my head, fully aware that Tess is already getting bored of this subject. "Yeah, most nights she does, but there's the odd one where she doesn't..." I'm not going to make a big deal of it, it's what happens with kids... Just a lot of moms would then be able to sleep it off later in the day, and I can't...

He nods slowly, and opens his mouth, apparently wanting to say more but Tess taps him on the shoulder as the lights turn to amber, and he redirects his attention to the road. I'm glad he does, I don't really want to talk about it anymore...

Five minutes later, we're driving through the gates of West Roswell High, and less than a minute later we're pulling up in the parking lot.

Yes, you heard me right, West Roswell High... When I was mentioned about Abby you probably assumed I was in college at least... Well, I'm not, and I'm not a teacher either if that's another thought which has occurred to you. I'm seventeen, a senior, and well let's just say my life makes one heck of a story...
Last edited by KatnotKath on Sun Jul 09, 2006 12:31 pm, edited 10 times in total.
My fics:

Dreams and Reality
Reality Revealed
Family Connections
When Love and Loss Collide
When Friendship and Love Combine - New!
If Only...
The Important Thing
Home for Christmas
I Knew Him Before (PB fic)
Love Always...
The First Time Around - New!

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Roswell Fanatic
Posts: 1130
Joined: Wed May 21, 2003 5:54 am
Location: UK

Post by KatnotKath » Fri Apr 14, 2006 12:54 pm

:shock: Wow, is this really my fic lol

Seriously, thanks to anyone that's reading, and especially to those who've replied, I'm glad you all seem to be enjoying it, however little the first part was. I have to admit though, while this next is longer, it's not anywhere near as long as my other fics. It's just a short fic both in number, and length of chapters it seems.

Thanette - interested is good :D:D
Morning Dreamgirl - Sorry, but gotta keep you reading haven't I :wink: hehe.
AllieXie - well there should be six proper chapters, plus the prologue and epilogue, if all nothing changes, so maybe you'll know when I finish?. Anyway, thanks for reading.
Emz80m - :oops: Thanks
Flamehair - My lips are sealed I'm afriad, you're going to have to continue reading to find out :wink:
L-J-L76 - I don't think that Tess really cared, she was making the comment about looking tired more as a dig than out of concern. All your other questions I'm afriad you'll have to keep reading for.
Lazza - thanks hun, I feel the same way with writing these replies, what can I answer without spoiling it...
KarenEvans - All I'm going to say is ask you to trust me... I want to say more, but really it could spoil the story,and I don't want to do that...
BETHANN - :oops: thanks, glad you like it

Okay, so now I just want to say three things - one is that I was intending on posting this sooner, so sorry for the wait but RL sometimes can be a pain lol.

Second, is to do with Morning Dreamgirl's comment about the length of the story. I am going to say again, that this WILL be short, because if it isn't, I don't think I would ever hear the end of it from certain people who want to see some of my current WIPS actually posted... Stringing it out might sound tempting, but this really was written just because I needed a break from my uni work, because I couldn't at the time work on any of the others I have going.

The final thing I want to say, is another type of apology - some of you might think I'm being awkward, or 'funny' in refusing to answer questions or saying so little. Basically, there's little I can say without giving it all away, which I don't want to do so I'm staying stum. All I can say, is please trust me!

And that said, here's the next part, I hope you like it and would love to hear what you think.



Chapter 1

You're probably all wondering how I ended up in this situation - well if you listen, you might just find out...

"Liz, Chica, wait up!"

That's Maria, my best friend. We've known each other since we were in diapers, and I can talk to her about anything...well, almost everything anyway...

Smiling, I stop and turn around as she dashes up. "Hey Maria..."

She grins. "Hey Chica, how's that angel of yours?" She asks, starting the day as always by asking about Abby.

I nod slightly. "Oh, she's good...bit cranky, but nothing I can't handle..." The warning bell rings, and we begin walking along again in the direction of our first class. "I think she's got another tooth coming through, so she's not sleeping too well…" I elaborate to explain a little of what I mean. If anyone at school is going to understand, it's Maria, because it's Maria who I spend most of my time with and therefore gets to see both Abby's good, and bad days…

"Oh, the poor thing…" Maria sympathises, her lip pouting.

Sighing, I nod again. "Yeah, well it's got to happen sometime… Just I kinda wish I could have been while we were on holiday from school you know…?" I hate seeing my baby upset whenever, but it's a hundred times worse when I have to leave her every morning to go to school.

Of course there are those who say that I shouldn't be at school anymore - that I gave up the right to an education the moment I got pregnant, but luckily my parents don't agree, and I'm certainly not going to give up my chance of making a good life for myself and Abby because of some stupid, ignorant…

Sorry, I'm getting off subject here I know, but it's hard sometimes. Anyway…

"Aww chica, are you okay…?" Maria's looking at me through those beautiful eyes which are just brimming with concern.

"Yeah, sure, of course, you know me, supermom…" I try to joke, attempting to laugh it off and then directing the subject elsewhere… "So, how was your date last night anyway?"

It's pretty obvious what I'm doing of course, but then I'm not trying to hide it. I don't mind if she realises why I'm changing the subject, just as long as she doesn't try pushing me on it further. Besides, sometimes it's nice just to talk about teenage stuff, because afterall, mom or not, that's what I am, a teenager…

"It was good… I can hardly believe this is the same Michael who bought me two in one shampoo as a gift last year…" She's grinning at first, but as she mentions the shampoo, her voice trails off, looking at me as though worried I'm going to burst into tears.

"It's okay Maria…I'm past it…" I assure her with a big smile, hoping that I can pull it off. "Besides, I moved on didn't I…? A bit fast maybe, but still…" Crossing fingers behind my back, I give her another big smile as we stop in front of my class. Unfortunately, this is where we split, most of my classes are AP, and well, Maria's…aren't… "I'll see you at lunch?"

"Sure chica, see you later…" She waves her hand at me and heads off down the corridor as I push open the door and step into class.

Clutching my books to my chest, in a manner which I have developed recently - I think it's like a substitute for Abby - I walk across the class, dropping my homework on the appropriate pile on the desk and making my way to my bench where I sit down.

"Hi Liz…"

I look over and give Max a small smile. "Hey…"

It always works like this, and there's never time to say anything more because a moment later, right on time, Mr Seiglmann walks through the door and class starts. We spend the next few minutes sat while he explains what we're doing today, then another fifty or so on the actual classwork, before clearing away and packing up.

I close my book after copying down tonight's homework assignment, and then reach a pencil which has rolled over to the other side of the desk. Apparently Max has seen it too, because he reaches out at the same time, his hand brushing mine just for an instant as he picks it up and hands it over. "Here, I think this is yours…"

I give a small nod and chew my lip. "Yeah…thanks…" Taking it from him, I drop it into my pencil case which I then close up, stacking it on top of my books as I pick them up, holding them against my chest again as I stand up and push back my stool. "I'll...see you later Max…" As the bell rings for the end of lesson, I hurry out of the room without looking back, my heart thumping against my chest.

My next class is Math, and as I hurry into the room, I take my place quickly and try not to look up as students continue to file in, busying myself with opening my book and making a last check through some calculations which we had to do for today.

"Hey Lizzie!" Alex, my other best friend drops down into the seat next to me loudly, providing me with a perfect distraction as another two figures walk into the room, one, tall, dark haired male, and the other a small blond female with curly hair.

Have you guessed who it is?

I turn my attention away from them quickly, focusing soley on Alex as I ask him about his weekend.

"Actually it was great! I managed to get that graphics card I've been wanting for ages…"

Despite his best efforts, he's unable to resist looking over in their direction for long but to his credit, he doesn't stop talking…

Alex is a big computer nut you see - lots of people might call him a nerd for it, but he does have the redeeming quality of being in a band, so computer nut it is… Even if he is something of a nut though, he's one great friend who I can always rely on…

He's been to a big computer fair at the weekend, and takes great delight in distracting me from the way Tess always fawns over Max until the teacher arrives.

That's right, it was Max and Tess who just walked in… And no, Tess isn't his girlfriend, although not from lack of trying… It's just…well…complicated…

As Mrs David walks into the room, all talking ceases, and it's down to work again. We go over the homework assignment quickly, which I'm delighted to find I got right, and then move onto today's work.

I guess you could say I'm pretty lucky really, I've always had a thing with numbers and such. Maths, science, they're 'my' subjects, and even after having Abby, I'm right on track to graduate at the end of this year at the top of the class…


I blink, having zoned for a moment. As said to Maria, I haven't exactly had a good night's sleep, and I'm kinda tired… "What…oh…sorry Mrs David…" I apologise in a flustered manner.

She looks at me questioningly, but doesn't say anything, instead choosing to glare at a couple of kids at the back of the room who are sniggering over my predicament. "Would you like to tell me what's so funny…?" She asks them expectantly.

Meanwhile, I've taken advantage of the distraction, and Alex is pointing out what she was asking me about, so that when she returns to me a moment later, I can actually answer without any problems.

I'm sure that she knows full well why that is, but she doesn't call me on my lack of attention, and instead simply nods, indicating that I'm right, and then moving on. I flash a grateful look over in Alex's direction and then try and concentrate for the rest of the lesson.

"Are you still needing me to watch Abby this Weekend?" Alex asks me as we're packing up our stuff an hour later.

I nod. "Yeah…if it's okay…"

I wouldn't usually have a problem, but mom and dad are away for the weekend at a conference, leaving me to open up the diner, and Maria's working too, which leaves Alex or… Well, basically Alex is my best option…

He grins and nods. "Sure, of course… Why wouldn't it, I haven't been able to spend some quality time with her for ages." He assures me with another smile, standing, and then waiting until I do the same before moving towards the door.

"Thanks, you know I really appreciate it…" I smile back at him as we step back out onto the corridor and head towards out lockers since it's homeroom next.

"Honestly Lizzie, I don't mind…" He grins again and slips an arm around my shoulders, squeezing them gently and then thinking for a moment. "So, do you want me to stay at yours, or can I take her out…?"

Time and time again he and Maria amaze me with how great they are with the whole thing about Abby… They could have just washed their hands of me when I got pregnant, but they didn't', they stuck by me, and they've been there whenever I needed them…

I sigh and shrug. "I'll leave that up to you, I'm not bothered either way, all I would ask is that you have her in the Crashdown for lunch on a Saturday…"

He nods with a smile, knowing that I always have lunch with Abby on a Saturday. I alternate weekends, as far as working, so that I can spend more time with her, but even when I'm working on a Saturday, I tend to go without my breaks morning and afternoon, and instead take one long lunch with my favourite girl. "Sure, no probs…"

We stop at his locker first, and then mine. I grab what books I need, and put the rest back inside and then glance at the clock, checking the time. Homeroom should be starting any minute, but I have something else I need to do first…

"Okay, ready?" Alex asks me, waiting patiently at the side.

I shake my head. "I think I need to visit the restroom first…I'll catch up with you okay?" I assure him with a smile.

Although surprised, he nods and after telling me he'll see me in class, heads off down the corridor leaving me alone. I push the door of my locker closed, and replace the lock, before walking quickly in the opposite direction to Alex, stopping in front of a door about half way down the corridor as the bell sounds. I look both ways, checking that no one's about, and then quickly slip inside, closing the door firmly behind me.
My fics:

Dreams and Reality
Reality Revealed
Family Connections
When Love and Loss Collide
When Friendship and Love Combine - New!
If Only...
The Important Thing
Home for Christmas
I Knew Him Before (PB fic)
Love Always...
The First Time Around - New!

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Roswell Fanatic
Posts: 1130
Joined: Wed May 21, 2003 5:54 am
Location: UK

Post by KatnotKath » Sun Apr 23, 2006 11:01 am

I'm back! :D

Thanks for all the wonderful feedback guys.

tiredmuse - Thanks, glad you're enjoying the story
RhondaAnn - I agree, I thought that the friendship between the two was very important, so I'm pleased that you think that I'm conveying it well. As for rest of your questions and comments I'm going to have to go with 'no comment', but if you keep reading till the end, I promise you'll have all your answers.
Morning Dreamgirl - LOL Sorry, yes, it's still going to be a short story, but I hope you'll enjoy it. For the rest, as with RhondaAnn, the response is 'no comment', read on and you'll find the answers you seek :wink:
L-J-L 76 - Thanks for reading, glad you're enjoying the story
Timelord31 - Well why don't you read and find out :wink:
AllieXie - Well here's the next part
roswell3053 - Thanks for reading
Lazza - lol Yes, I promise, I'm keeping it short. Thanks for reading.
Emz80m - Glad to know you're enjoying the story
behrluv32 - short is about 8 parts, including prologue and epilogue. As for the rest I'm afraid it's my usual answer, read on and you'll find out...
anonyamousarfan - Thanks
Flamehair - :) glad you're enjoying the story

Thanks for all the great feedback guys, hope anyone else reading is enjoying the story too. I'm not going to answer questions, because as I said before it would likely spoil the story and I don't want to do that so hope you don't mind my keeping stum.

Here's the next chapter, I'm not as certain about it as the others, but love to hear what you think as always.


Note: * indicates telepathic conversation

Chapter 2

*I’ve missed you so much…* The familiar voice echo in my mind, just as it did a couple of hours before as he asked after Abby, pressing to know what happened last night, and apologising for not being there. I smile and turn around.

I’m a small room, probably no more than two metre square, lined with shelves full of books and other school equipment. Yet despite it’s size, it’s a room that pretty much everyone knows about, and that most of the senior class have probably been in at one time or another. The eraser room… Used for cleaning erasers, and well…certain other things…

I don’t say anything as I meet his eyes, simply close small distance which separates us, walking into his open arms and looking up, as his lips come crashing down onto mine.

It might be short, but we need this time… The doors closed and ‘locked’ – stuck as far as anyone outside is concerned, and for the moment all we need to worry about is one another…

As I press my lips back against his, I feel his tongue teasing and my mouth opens slightly, allowing him entry as my tongue extends to meet his, running up and down, battling. I soft moan escapes my mouth, so quiet it’s almost inaudiable, but I know he’s heard it…

“How I love you…” He whispers, drawing me deeper into his arms and whispering in my ear, trailing him tongue along the edge and causing tingles to run down my spine with every little touch.

This is our time…

Hooking my arms behind his neck, I rise up on tiptoes, turning my head so that his lips are level with mine once more as I kiss him again, this time initiating the kiss myself, although I’m pretty sure he won’t object.

In fact, on the contrary, he now moves to deepen the kiss, drawing me in further and making me want to forget about anything else. It’s as though time has stopped, as though everything in the world around is frozen, and we’re the only one’s moving.

And we’re not just moving, we’re floating, floating high, together, on a soft cloud…in heaven…

His lips leave mine, trailing a path down by neck, to where my shirt starts. He reaches for my buttons, unfastening them, one after one, and after each, before moving onto the next, kissing the expanse of soft skin which is exposed.

“Oooh…” My head rocks back, my eyes closed and my mouth slightly open as this takes over every sense.

I’m here, with him, and that’s all that matters…

*You are perfect…*

He speaks in my mind again, and I feel that ever present connection between the two of us flairing up, peaking at full strength for the moment. Some days it’s just like a dim murmur in the back of my mind, a reminder, something which I push away, because I have to, but at others, like now, it’s like a lifeline… I feel his overwhelming love, and send him back mine. *You’re not bad yourself…*

I hear him laugh, and right at this moment in time, I’m not sure whether it was out loud, or inwardly…because my mind is more focused on other things…

My shirt is wide open now, and he’s nibbling on the delicate, tender flesh of my breasts, showing me every second how much he cares and loves me.

Opening my eyes, I look up into his eyes and move back as my hands slip forward and down, mirroring the actions of his own as I carefully unfasten button after button, running my hands over the muscular chest which is revealed when I’m done.

“Come here…” He whispers again, drawing me closer again, sliding his arms behind my back and pulling me up against him as he captures my lips in his once more.

A smile plays on my lips as I feel the hardness which is now rubbing up against me, one of my hands slipping down, unbuttoning his waistband followed by pulling down the zip and then his boxers.

Now it’s his turn to moan as I turn my attentions to the length of his shaft, running a finger along slowly as we continue to kiss. I’m gentle and deliberate, I know what to do and how… Easy does it, once twice…

His eyes grow wide and I know he’s struggling. “It’s okay…let it out…” I whisper softly, burying my head in his shoulder and kissing the skin, revelling in the taste of everything that is him.

He looks at me questioningly, and I nod, using my whole hand, cupped now, as I begin to rub faster. The last was designed to tease, this is something more…

“No…wait…” He holds up a hand to me, dipping his head to kiss my neck, teasing my skin with his tongue and continuing his caresses with only one hand as he explores my upper body. A moment later, I feel my own waistband drop, as tugs my jeans down over my hips and slides a finger between my knickers and my skin, easily finding that spot he’s looking for which makes my pulse quicken and my skin burn. He rubs so gently, speaking of his knowledge of me, and yet the feeling is…amazing…

Ohhh…I need him…

He smiles, raising his head again to once more meet my waiting lips as we both continue our attentions to the other, feeling that burst of wonder and joy which shoots through the connection.

We’re both coming close, but however wonderful this is, it can never compare to the ultimate… Having him inside me is just… I closer my eyes, resting my head against his chest as I continue to breath heavily, remembering what it was like as we both climax together…

Sticky fluid covers my hand as I feel his errection fall and I smile as he wipes his hand over mine, cleaning up the mess in an instant.

“I love you…” He whispers again, kissing me once more before we move to pull up our trousers and refasten our shirts. Time is growing short now I know, but I’m not ready for this to end, not yet…

Waiting until he’s done, wrap my arms around him once more, burying my head in his chest, wanting this moment to just go on and on. To be with him…forever…

I feel his arms close tightly around my frame, making me feel incredibly safe, as though when I’m with him, no one can ever hurt me.

*I’m always here Lizzy…always here for you, I promise…*

I smile softly and nod, although I know physically in a few moments he’ll be gone again. This is the way it has to be though, I know it, he knows it…however hard it is…

But then he kisses me again, and for the duration of that kiss, all such thoughts fly from my mind. All that matters is that I’m with him, now…

Unfortunately, as always, all too soon it’s over, and after one last, lingering kiss, and a look so full of longing and desire, he turns towards the door, waving a hand over the lock and listening carefully, looking back at me briefly. “I’m sorry…” He whispers, reaching out and cupping my cheek in one of his hands for another moment before it drops back to his side and he opens the door, slipping out into the corridor and leaving me alone once more.

*I love you Liz…always and forever…*

I smile as I wait in silence, hearing his voice through our now-fading connection, waiting until it’s safe to follow. *I love you too Max…*
My fics:

Dreams and Reality
Reality Revealed
Family Connections
When Love and Loss Collide
When Friendship and Love Combine - New!
If Only...
The Important Thing
Home for Christmas
I Knew Him Before (PB fic)
Love Always...
The First Time Around - New!

User avatar
Roswell Fanatic
Posts: 1130
Joined: Wed May 21, 2003 5:54 am
Location: UK

Post by KatnotKath » Fri May 05, 2006 12:08 pm

begonia9508 - FutureMax... Hmm...it could be...or not...
RhondaAnn - You got it in one, no answers from me, but maybe you should read on to get them from Liz :wink:. Don't worry about asking the questions though, its nice to see what people are thinking :D
g7silvers - Present Max? - you never know... The 'asking' about Abby wasn't what happened in the jeep though - it was done in the same way as he greeted her in the eraser room, just earlier in the morning while at school... Thanks for reading the story, I'm glad you're enjoying it.
Timelord31 - maybe...
AllieXie - Why couldn't FutureMax have a connection with her...? Sorry, couldn't resist asking the question. You know the drill by now I'm sure though, I'm not saying either way but hopefully the story will provide all the answers you're seeking.
Morning Dreamgirl - This is an alternate universe yes... More of a spin off from the cannon than a completely new one though...if that makes any sense...? I could say more, but I think I'll let Liz do that hehe. As for the bribing...well...sorry, no... As I said, certain people would have my hide if I did...not to mention the fact I'm so busy, and plus the fact that if I extend this, the other fics I'm already posting might suffer too, and I for one don't want that...
behrluv32 - here's where I say 'no comment' sorry...
roswell3053 - I promise I'll explain, or rather Liz will...starting below :D
anonyamousarfan - thanks for reading, glad you're enjoying the story.
Empress_luci - sorry I couldn't get here sooner, but here you go
Natz - thanks for the pm, glad to know you're enjoying the story

Thanks for all the fantastic feedback :D:D

I feel really bad, keep saying 'no comment' and knowing that you're putting time into thinking about it, but I just don't want to spoil it. There's so much I want to say, but I think maybe it's better I let Liz do that for me :wink:

Sorry it's taken me a while to get back, but here's the next chapter and I hope you enjoy it.


Chapter 3

Okay, I know, so now you’re asking what the heck is going on?

First of all, yes that was the same Max who offered me a lift to school with, and yes it’s the same Max that Tess keeps throwing herself at. Next question, why am I kissing him? – simple, I love him, and he loves me…

So why am I not going out with him officially…why are we hiding? – Unfortunately, much as we would like it to be, life sometimes isn’t simple…in fact, it can be down right complicated, especially when aliens are involved…

Aliens…? I think I might hear you rolling on the floor laughing, and I can’t say I would blame you… I would have been doing exactly the same thing two years ago…but then Max Evans came into my life, and I guess you could say, everything changed…

Why don’t you sit back, and get comfortable, because this could be something of a long story…

My name is Elizabeth Claudia Parker, and I’ve lived all my life in Roswell, New Mexico. My parents own an alien-themed diner called the Crashdown – I know, it’s very original isn’t it…? – and I work there as a waitress.

My story begins in September 1999, just before we went back to school. Maria and I were serving in the Crashdown, and Max and Michael – yes, the same Michael mentioned earlier – were sat in one of the booths.

They used to do that a lot… Maria was convinced Max was interested in me, but refused to believe it, instead suggesting that it was Michael who was interested in her. Needless to say perhaps, neither of us gave much credence to the other’s theory, although in the end, I guess you could say we were both right…

Turns out the actual reason is that Max was interested in me, but I’ll get to that, and how Maria ended up dating Michael later…

Anyway, we were getting on with our job, joking a bit about Max and Michael, and generally just having a pretty good time.

That was when it happened! I don’t really remember fully how, but suddenly these guys sat at one of the tables started arguing, and then one of them had a gun… It was like something out of a nightmare - only real, and everything seemed like it was in slow motion…

The gun went off, and I got shot. I went down, and I was bleeding badly according to Maria. I don’t remember all that much of this part of course, considering I was barely conscious, but then there was this voice, telling me to open my eyes, and when did so, I found myself looking into the most intense amber eyes you can possibly imagine…

That was Max… He saved me, and not in the way you might think… It wasn’t a case that he kept me talking until the ambulance arrived, or he held a compress to keep me from losing too much blood – Maria had been trying all that and it wasn’t working – no, quite literally, Max Evans saved my life…

And then he was gone… Sirens sounded obviously approaching, and he broke a bottle of ketchup, smeared it over me, telling me I’d just fallen before racing out of the diner with Michael.

The rest of that day was just…weird…

I remember looking at my dress when I was upstairs in my room, and being able to stick my nail through a small hole in the material – a bullet hole…

And yet there was no bullet inside me… When I’d cleaned up, my skin had been completely clear…no cut, no graze even…

I went to see Max the following day, my questions compounded by an interesting cell sample I looked at from him in class, demanded to know what he had done, and he told me what sounded like such an incredible story… The thing was, the most incredible thing was that it was true…

Max has been at the same school as me since third grade… We’ve grown up together I guess, although not exactly as friends… We were lab partners in bio, but other than that we didn’t really talk. He had his friends, and his sister, and I had mine… As far as I was concerned, Max was a perfectly normal guy…

Turned out, that so wasn’t the case…

Max, Michael and Isabel his sister are aliens… I know, sounds crazy, but bear with me…? Forget about the green eyes and big heads, or small stature… Forget about ET or Independence day… Max, Isabel and Michael look just like any of us, only they’re not… They were in ‘the’ Roswell crash…in 1947… They were in these incubation chambers for want of a better description… Turns out they look kinda like cocoons – but how I know that is another story entirely…

Anyway, in 1989, they hatched from these incubation chambers, looking like normal six year olds… Mr and Mrs Evans found Max and Isabel, but Michael hid when they appeared so they got separated… While he got put into foster-care, they were adopted, and I don’t think they saw one another again for a few years.

My details on exactly what happened then are still a bit sketchy, but you’ve got the important stuff… Max and the others are aliens…

Well, having grown up in Roswell all my life, and having lived above an alien-themed diner, you might be able to imagine I was kinda sceptical at first, but with a couple of demonstrations, and after thinking about what he had done for me, I did actually come round to believing the idea…

But in believing, I also have to admit I freaked…just a little… Nothing on the scale of Maria though, when she confronted me with her order book which showed the remains of my blood which wasn’t supposed to have been spilled…

I know, I know, I’m getting off the subject again, but you have to admit, it’s somewhat understandable… This was a huge thing that happened…

Anyway, Max came to see me that night, and we talked some more… It was kind of weird, because he ‘remembered’ stuff he hadn’t been there for – thanks to the connection he made when he healed me…

I guess it was pretty obvious I was still feeling somewhat nervous about it all, because he suggested making a connection again, only going the opposite way, letting me see him….

The long and short of it, is that I agreed, and I that was when I found out how he felt about me…and maybe it was when I realised how I felt too…

Maria and I risked a lot to help Max, Isabel and Michael over the next few weeks… We risked losing Alex for one, because we couldn’t let him in… We kept their secret, but even more, we protected it… What happened at the diner hadn’t gone unnoticed it seemed, and people were watching…

I could probably spend days telling you exactly what happened, but perhaps needless to say, Max and got close… I got more and more drawn into the ‘alien abyss’ as Maria called it, and I fell hard…

Michael and Isabel weren’t too keen on us getting close, and Max at first tried to keep me at arms length too… He never denied his feelings, but he felt it was too dangerous to allow me to get close. In the end though, it was only a matter of time, and I think probably we both knew it…

I guess the turning point was my Grandma Claudia died later that year… I needed Max so badly, and he was there for me… He wouldn’t save her as I asked of him, but that was because he knew he couldn’t play God… What he did do was let me say goodbye though, and that’s something I will always remember…

We started getting closer despite the fact everyone said we shouldn’t… Things got more intense, both in our relationship, and in life… The important thing though was that we coped with it together…

Eventually, despite all the insistences that he couldn’t be told, I didn’t have a choice, and I came clean to Alex. He knew something was wrong, but not everything, and considering we were locked up in a cell – yeah, that’s right, we’d been at a rave, and somehow ended up being caught with alcohol which I jump to assure you we didn’t drink – I thought that telling him I had a least a chance of getting him to stay quiet, and not speak out to the Sheriff who already had his suspicions…

Alex didn’t believe me at first, but he was convinced that I believed what I was saying, so didn’t go to the Sheriff… We both got home that evening, thanks to some sharp talking from Alex, and things went on…

Anyway, while all this had been going on, Maria and Michael had been sort of dating on and off, they argued like cats and dogs, but they always made up in the end it seemed... It was something which happened during one of their break-up phases which is the next thing I guess I should mention… Put simply – Michael nearly died…

Let me explain a little… Earlier, thanks to something else which had happened – which I’m not going to elaborate on otherwise we’d be here all day - Max and I had gone to the Indian reservation, and found something there… We also talked to this guy – RiverDog, Michael decided he wanted to do the same himself…and he got himself into a little bit of trouble shall we say…? – basically his alien DNA didn’t cope too well with the ‘ceremony’ he walked in on…

I know what happened scared me, not only because of nearly losing Michael, but also because I was worried it could happen to Max at some point. I cared for him deeply – too deeply perhaps… It caused Max to say he wanted to take a step back, and in the end, we broke up…

It wasn’t until Maria entered her and I into the KROZ competition (something for which I could have killed her when I found out), and I won, that things started to look up again, and even then it was only for one night… Max kidnapped me when I was on my date, and well…let’s say that we discovered a weakness of his – alcohol… He apparently had been commiserating with Kyle – my previous ex-, and had taken a sip from his hip flash…

Oh, and yes, I do mean a sip… Apparently he’s completely intolerant to it, which made for something of a strange evening…if rather wonderful…

Unfortunately, when he sobered up, he didn’t exactly remember it, and it wasn’t for a couple more weeks that we actually got back together properly…

What I can tell you, is that when we did, I felt as though I was coming home though…it felt just so right, and so…wonderful… For all the complications which plagued our relationship, we were just a teenage couple in love…
Last edited by KatnotKath on Fri May 05, 2006 1:35 pm, edited 4 times in total.
My fics:

Dreams and Reality
Reality Revealed
Family Connections
When Love and Loss Collide
When Friendship and Love Combine - New!
If Only...
The Important Thing
Home for Christmas
I Knew Him Before (PB fic)
Love Always...
The First Time Around - New!

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Roswell Fanatic
Posts: 1130
Joined: Wed May 21, 2003 5:54 am
Location: UK

Post by KatnotKath » Sat May 13, 2006 9:01 am

Thanks for all the feedback guys

LoveIsForever - Maybe, maybe not...here's Liz to give the answer though :wink:
Begonia9508 - Thanks for reading Eve, here's some more answers for you.
Flamehair - Yes it's present Max, the rest I think I'll let Liz answer though
RhondaAnn - So glad you enjoyed it, I was a little worried that maybe she had summed it up too neatly :-?
Morning Dreamgirl - Thanks Ashley, I'm delighted to hear you say that - I always try to go for realistic, even if I do have aliens in there too :-?. Anyway, three more parts to go after this, and much as I shouldn't say it, actually I'm already thinking of a sequel myself...so you never know :wink:
BETHANN - Thanks, glad to hear you're enjoying it
g7silvers - I'm going to leave it to Liz to explain again, hope you don't mind too much. Thanks for reading though, and for the thoughtful feedback.
Timelord31 - Glad you enjoyed it and I'll tell you one thing - nothing happened the night in the van, because that night didn't happen...no kidnapping by Nacedo, no White room, and no rescue.
roswell3053 - Waiting's over - here's your answers :D
Elizabeth Kivana - Actually, Abby's about a year old, and as for who's the dad, Liz is about to reveal all :wink:
AllieXie - Thanks for reading, Max is present Max, Liz's connection is with him, and she's about to explain the rest.
FallenMagic - RIDA! :D:D YAY, glad you made it, and you know you can never annoy me :wink:. You're the one to talk about suspense and confusion though hehe Hopefully this next chapter should clear up all the confusion though, I just hope it doesn't disappoint you.
Alien614 - Welcome to the story, glad you're enjoying it

Thanks for all the wonderful feedback guys, I want to say so much more, but I don't want to risk ruining this chapter... I think this chapter should pretty much clear up and answer most of the questions which have been asked. Hope it won't dissapoint.


Chapter 4

Let me guess - next question would be how we went from going out properly to sneaking around…? I'll tell you in one word - Tess…

Tess appeared late that year after Max and I had got back together and if we thought things had been complicated before, they were set to become completely and utterly impossible it seemed…

It turned out that she was the alien's fourth - there's a long complicated story to that, but I'm going to stick with a simplified version. Max, Isabel, Michael and Tess are basically like clones… Their alien DNA comes from four people who lived on their world previously, the King, Princess, King's second, and yes, you've guessed it, the Queen…

So you see all of a sudden, my boyfriend was being told he had a wife - and it certainly wasn't me…

Max insisted that he didn't want her, he wanted me, but then, when we were together, I got this flash… At first I thought it was from him, it wasn't impossible, it had happened before, but it turned out it wasn't… This one was one for me alone it seemed, and it almost tore me apart…

I saw Max, Isabel, Michael, me, and numerous others of our loved ones, dead… My parents, Amy, Mr and Mrs Evans, Maria and Alex…they were all there, their wide lifeless eyes looking up at me, and there was nothing I could do.

Had I been sleeping, I would have believed it to be a nightmare, but I was awake, and somehow I knew it was real…or could bee…

I got more of the flashes, I suppose they were more like visions really, and as I did so, the message became clear… If I stayed with Max, Tess would leave, and everyone would die… Not now, and not tomorrow…but one day… One day, my happiness would destroy everyone, and I couldn't let that happen…

Max and I spoke long and hard, we theorised that the reason that Tess would leave was that she didn't feel as though she was part of the group. She had arrived out of the blue and, other than Isabel, I don't think any of us had really welcomed her. She hung around with the rest of us…but was she really part of us…?

No… The conclusion we came to was simple and so, with a lot of thought and consideration, we concocted a plan that would hopefully change all that…

The idea was simple really of course, to try and incorporate her into the group, involve her in things. We'd try and cool our relationship for a bit, give her some time…

If might have worked…had I not realised soon after that, that something had happened, and changed everything…

Yes, that's right…Abby…

You see Max isn't only the man I love, he's also the father of my child, and that's something that no one can ever know… He spends a bit of time with her, but no where near as much as he would like… It's too risky to do more - people would ask questions - after all, we're not even supposed to be good friends anymore…

The realisation about Abby meant we had to change our plans, and the result in some ways, was disastrous… We broke up, extremely publicly, and soon after I admitted to being pregnant… I claimed her father was a one night stand, some guy from the nearby college and that I didn't even know his name… It wasn't exactly 'in-character' for me, but it was the best I could do… Everyone knew about the break up and just seemed to accept what I said. I'd been hurt, and sometimes people who've been hurt do stupid things…

My parents were disappointed of course. They supported me, but I could see that look in their eyes…that look which told me that they had wanted me to do so much more…

And yet much as I hated seeing that look, that wasn't the worst…

Max and I had been prepared to cool our relationship, at least in public...but this was something far more… We'd been planning to remain as good friends, maybe even say we were just taking a break, but that wouldn't work anymore…

No, Max had to make out he was angry, really angry… Our friendship, as far as anyone outside was concerned crumbled to nothing and we barely spoke for months…

It's better now of course... We have sort of been able to rebuild something as far as the outside is concerned, and we're all a part of the same group, but until Tess finally finds a reason other than Max to stay for, until we know she truly feels like part of the group, we both know it can't go any further…

And that's the hardest thing about all this… Sometimes I feel like my heart is being torn out, having to sit there, and watch him, or talk to him and pretend I don't feel the way I do…

I know it's worse for Max though… You might all be thinking right now that he's got it easy, but think of it this way - while I'm coping with Abby, albeit as essentially a single mother, he's missing out on his daughter's life…

For the duration of the rest of my pregnancy, we barely spoke two words to one another in public. He couldn't go to my scans, and he couldn't be there when she was born.

He didn't see her until she was about a month old - all because it was too risky…

While I was pregnant and still at school we might be able to sneak a few minutes together somewhere but after I had her, it wasn't that easy... Either mom or dad was always about it seemed, never leaving me alone with Abby at first, and so we just couldn't risk Max being seen… All it needed was for one of them to mention seeing him to the wrong person, and then everything we had done and given up, would be for nothing…

So we waited that month…those long four weeks, counting down the days until he could claim that his anger had subsided to an extent, and he could come to see us…

Whatever you might think, I know he loves her, he really does. Not that I ever doubted he would, but I can see it every time he looks at her, or asks me how she's doing.

If only things could be different…

I know you probably still think he's got the sweet side of this - no responsibility, no parents to deal with, no sleepless nights or being unable to go out because of having a child.

And I guess you're right in some ways… He didn't have to deal with telling his parents what had happened, and he is free, within reason, to do what he wants without the complication of a child…

But it's really not as simple as it sounds… You can say that Max has it easy all you like, but that's not true!

He doesn't have the practical stuff to deal with - no - instead he has the emotional side… The guilt he feels for this situation, the pain he feels every time he knows he can't be there for Abby, or me… You say that he doesn't have the responsibility, but in his mind he does, and he wants it…

We both want so much more than this…

Maria and Alex see Abby at least a couple of times a week, popping in to see me if nothing else - they're the perfect doting aunt and uncle, despite the fact they're teenagers themselves - and yet her father, her 'Uncle Max' might see her only once a fortnight…if that…

It's the way it has to be of course, but that doesn't mean we have to like it… We know that it wouldn't be likely that Max would warm to her a lot… We know that he can't spend time with her alone however much as he would like to… After all, we can't afford to forget that she's supposed to be the result of my ultimate betrayal of him…

Sometimes I wonder if it's truly worth it… If it wouldn't be better simply to have decided to move on, or if I shouldn't have accepted it originally when we broke up the first time… I wouldn't be here, struggling to juggle school, with working, and looking after a child…

But I also wouldn't be here feeling his love surround me either…and I wouldn't have Abby… Can I honestly say that I would change having her? - the simple answer is no…

I loved her from the moment that I discovered I was pregnant, and no matter what happens, she's the reason I always keep going… My daughter is my life, and however hard having her made things, if I could go back and do things again, I don't think I would do anything different…

I can't regret her, and I can't honestly regret anything between Max and I…

Maybe you think I'm crazy, or a wimp for saying this, but I love Maxwell Philip Evans. I know I'll wait as long as I have to in order to be with him…and it's as simple, or complicated, as that… I want to be a family, a true family… I want to hear our daughter laugh and giggle, and see Max beside her… I want her to know she has a mommy and a daddy that love her very much… I want to marry him one day too, I want to be Mrs Maxwell Evans and to be able to call him my husband… And that's my dream…

But of course whether that will ever happen or not doesn't lie in my hands or even his…that's all up to Tess…

It's been nearly two years now, and still she's trying to get Max… Still she's fawning over him and fluttering her eyelashes… He does nothing to encourage her, despite the fact he's officially single, making it perfectly clear that he's not interested it seems, but she just doesn't seem to get the message. She's a part of the group of course, but considering that our group is more than a little 'messy' now, I'm not sure that's enough…

So for now, we have to sneak around, make do with the briefest of 'honest' encounters… We don't often risk it at school, more often it's back at my place when my parents are out. It's not the most ideal, but we need that time… We need to be together sometimes, to be able to be honest about our feelings, and really talk to one another…amongst other things…

Maria is going out with Michael again, she has been for nearly a year solid now. It's a far cry from those early days, when Max and I were the solid couple, and Michael and Maria were constantly at one another's throats. Maybe it has something to do with what they believe happened between us…that they finally admitted the strength of their true feelings, and there's been no looking back from either since then.

Alex and Isabel didn't work out though…and I can't help thinking that's because of us too… Isabel's civil to me, but nothing more… I betrayed Max, jumped into bed with the first guy who came along - well, that's what she thinks anyway… Alex on the other hand blames it all on the nasty public break-up Max and I had… Which therefore means that he blames Max, and hence doesn't get on wonderfully with his sister…

It's a shame…I wish it could be different… They make a good couple, but well…I guess life sometimes gets in the way of what we want doesn't it…?

How I wish we could tell the others the truth… But I know we can't…. It's too risky, there's just too much at stake, and much as I want to be happy, I won't put that happiness before the welfare of my friends and family…

I keep telling myself over and over every day that that is why we're doing this, and I know it's necessary, but that doesn't make it easy.

Do you know how much I want to just run into his arms? How much I need him?

Day by day it seems to get harder, and I need him more… When Abby was born, I used to cry myself to sleep most nights, yearning to feel his arms around me once more. I used to muffle my sobs in the pillows, or even tell mom it was Abby crying if she asked me about it…

Those first few weeks and months after I had her were so difficult - I was uncertain, scared even…I suddenly had this huge responsibility, and I felt that I was still little more than a child myself… Sometimes I felt so completely and utterly helpless, and those were the times when I felt so alone. My parents and friends were there of courses…but it wasn't the same…

But as difficult as it was then, it's a hundred times worse now… I'm more confident and mature, made so by experience…physically, the tasks are easier perhaps, and yet emotionally they're not… I see my daughter growing up in front of me, the months are flying by, and there's always something missing…

My daughter doesn't know her father…

We're all going off to college next year, and at the moment, I'll be the single mother with a kid…

But that's not what I want… Whatever happens, of course I'll still have a child and I wouldn't give Abby up for anything, but the basic thing is that I don't want to be doing it alone…

I want Max to be there with me…

I look to the future at the moment, and it's all so uncertain… Where will I be in five years time? - I know where I hope, but whether it will happen, well, that's another matter… I can wish and I can hope but, in the end, I guess my future is in someone else's hands…

So, there's your answers - that's me, Liz Parker, teenage mom and 'Juliet' in this whole mess of a situation… Anymore questions?

My fics:

Dreams and Reality
Reality Revealed
Family Connections
When Love and Loss Collide
When Friendship and Love Combine - New!
If Only...
The Important Thing
Home for Christmas
I Knew Him Before (PB fic)
Love Always...
The First Time Around - New!

User avatar
Roswell Fanatic
Posts: 1130
Joined: Wed May 21, 2003 5:54 am
Location: UK

Post by KatnotKath » Fri Jun 09, 2006 11:20 am

Sorry for the delay, it's a whole lot later than I would have liked, but life gets in the way sometimes it seems.

Thanks for all the wonderful feedback!

FallenMagic - Rida, seem to know just how to say exactly what I need to hear :wink:. I was so worried about people thinking that I was just letting Max off scott free, along of course which the lack of an Isabel/Alex coupling, which I thought might not go down too well. It's just as you say though, life isn't perfect, and I just didn't see everyone being together... Thanks for reading, and glad I didn't disappoint - the same hope goes for this one too...
begonia9508 - Let's hope that you're wrong...
Morning Dreamgirl -
Yes...Are you sure there isn't a way you can't just kill her and take her place?

LOL oh Ashley, thank you! I so needed to laugh when I read that from you.

Onto your questions, which finally I can begin to answer :D:D - as far as they know at the moment, Abby is completely human, although later in life, who knows...

I think as far as the planning went, Liz and Max did the best they thought they could. It's not ideal, far from it...but the thing which keeps them going is that hope that things will work out. Them getting back together might not raise quite as many eyebrows as you're thinking, they are friends again, and everyone knows they were once involved... It might be seen as a little surprising, but I don't know about so unlikely. It's not like they've got back together months after or anything like this, even now it's over a year, and they've taken their time to build a new friendship in the view of others... *shrugs* sorry, maybe I'm just rambling, but there I go lol.

As for Mr and Mrs Evans... No, I imagine they won't be too welcoming at first, but people do make mistakes, and life does go on. If the two of them get back together, it might take some time, but I think probably they'll come around.

When it comes to university, I see them going to different places, but probably in near vincinity, including Alex and Liz... They are still involved in the group, and like it or not, the things they've been through can't easily be put behind them...

RhondaAnn - Kyle's not a part of the group in this so there's not really any reason why they'd think of him as a possible match for Tess - the cannon storyline didn't continue as far as the White room and Destiny, so basically Kyle's just another kid at school, who did of course date Liz at one time.
g7silvers - I'd love to agree, but deal with her how? I know it's a horrible situation, but they really are trying their best...
Alien64 - Thanks
pandas2001 - I've never thought of Liz and Max as particularly selfish characters though - it seems as though they're always having to make sacrifices for others, and I guess that's what this is... It sucks, but there it is.
Emz80m - Maybe they would take the time they had if it was just them...but remember that Liz saw their parents and friends too - they're unwilling to put their happiness above their family and friend's lives I guess...
Timelord31 - Thanks for reading
roswell3053 - Well you know what people say - Life isn't fair :(.
behrluv32 - You're right, it's a big mess, but then isn't that par for the alien abyss that they live in?
isabelle - You made it :D:D:D Thanks for taking the time to read, I know you've been really busy and so glad you like the story so far.
You're right about Tess being the fly in the ointment - that person who's always there to mess it up between Liz and Max - you'd never mistake me for a rebel would you lol. As for Abby and powers, she hasn't shown any signs yet, so I guess they'll have to cross that bridge when they come to it.
Flamehair - I know it's out of character for Liz to have a one-night-stand, but if she doesn't usually drink, and did that night, maybe they think she could have been drunk and not really known what she was doing...?
LoveIsForever - Yup, hard all round for our couple here it seems.

Okay, so I apologise repeatedly to you guys, as said above, I didn't mean this to take as long, but I've been neck high in papers and notes (a little exaggeration there yes). Seriously though, I have been majorly busy with revising, and my time on the computer and internet has been next to nothing compared to normal.

I have now officially finished though :D:D - still trying to work out what to do next year, but as of this morning, the exams are over at least.

So, hopefully beter late than never, here's the new chapter.


Chapter 5

After waiting a couple of minutes, I now move to towards the door, listening carefully just as Max did earlier. He’ll be long gone by now, sitting in his homeroom, which is of course different to mine, and hopefully the corridor outside is going to be empty…

One, two…three… Here goes…

Taking a breath, I open the door and step outside, closing it quickly behind me and looking round.

My breath catches in my throat as I notice Tess talking to someone at the other end of the corridor, fearing for a moment that she’ll see me, and just know… It seems that she’s unaware of me though and after a moment, I let out a sigh of relief, taking a deep breath and walking towards her since that’s the direction in which my homeroom is found.

I half expect her to say something as I approach, but still she seems unaware of my presence, apparently completely involved in talking to whoever is with her.

That’s when I realise who the other person is… Kyle… Although I try not to stare, it’s difficult not to watch her for a moment, and as I see her laugh at something he’s said, I realise that look on her face is one I’ve never really seen before. She looks truly happy…and while she’s clearly flirting with him, it’s nothing like the ‘throw’ tactics she employs with Max…

Is it really, could it be…?

I’m not really sure what to make of this new development, but after everything we’ve been through, dare I really hope…? I hold my breath, quickening my pace as I pass them and going into class, apologising to the teacher quickly and then sitting down.

Unsurprisingly perhaps, I get very little work done during homeroom, my mind occupied by other things, hopes, or prayers even…

My preoccupation doesn’t go unnoticed by Alex either, who pulls me to one side as soon as we’re in the corridor again. “Lizzie, are you okay?”

I nod absently, although I’m really not completely with him at the moment. “Yes I’m fine Alex…just I was thinking is all…” I respond, attempting to excuse myself quickly to make a trip to the ladies room.

He raises his eyebrow in surprise. “Again? You know the last time you went this often you were pregnant…that isn’t the case this time is it…?”

I can feel my cheeks flushing, no doubt turning a deep shade of red. I had temporarily forgotten my earlier excuse… “What, oh no, definitely nothing like that…” I shake my head, laughing it off. “I just…” I trail off without finishing. “I’ll join you and Maria in the canteen okay…?” Without waiting to see if he’ll respond, I dash off, ducking into the restroom a little way down the corridor and then locking myself in one of the cubicles…

If I’m right, and Tess is finally moving on, it’s everything we’ve been hoping for, but the question is how to find out… I mean I saw her earlier, she was still all over him in Math…is Kyle just a bit of fun for her until Max comes around, or is it more she’s got into a habit of flirting with Max but Kyle’s the one she’s interested in now…?

I wish I could get inside her mind, understand what she’s thinking…

Sighing, I lean my head against the cool metal side of the cubicle, desperately wanting it to be the latter of the two… If only…


I bit my lip as I hear Maria’s voice, having little doubt that she’s here because of me having just dashed off from Alex. No doubt he went straight to her locker and told her where I was…

“Liz?” She calls again, and I hear her pushing open a couple of the doors.

Taking a deep breath, I slide the lock off and open the door, revealing myself to her. “Hey Maria…” I greet her with a weak smile, hoping that my internal conflict will remain just that – internal…

“Hey Chica…Alex said you seemed upset about something…?” Her concern is obvious and if I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a hundred times, I HATE lying to her…

Unfortunately, I don’t see much option but to continue at the moment, and I shake my head. “What, oh no, I’m fine…” I assure her with another smile as I step out and pretend to be freshening up.

She reaches over, stopping the water and causing me to look up. “You look tired…”

Well that is something that I can laugh about, and laugh I do… “Maria, I have a one-year-old daughter, I’m holding down a part-time job, and I’m still going to school…I think it would be way more worrying if I wasn’t tired…”

I can’t help but chuckle in amusement at the rather sheepish expression which she now offers me, nodding. “Yeah, I guess you’re right…sorry…”

Shaking my head, I sigh and look over. “It’s okay Maria…now, can I finish freshening up so that we can go to lunch?” I motion to the tap and smile as she nods, finishing what I’m doing quickly and then heading back out onto the corridor with her.

I need to talk to Max, but that’s going to have to wait I guess… For the moment, it’s business as usual as we head into the canteen, grabbing some drinks to go with our sandwiches and then walking over to where Alex is already sat with the others.

It’s strange in some ways, the fact that we still all sit together, but I guess that’s just a part of having shared the secret for so long… We might not be best of friends anymore, but there’s something between the six of us that we can’t quite give up… “Hey guys…” I greet them with something of a smile.

Max doesn’t look up, and I know that’s probably because after what happened between us not an hour before, he wouldn’t be able to hide how he feels. Isabel however does nod, and Michael greets Maria with a smile, moving over so that she can sit next to him.

“I-is Tess not here yet…?” I ask hesitantly as I note her absence at the table.

“Does it look like it…?” Isabel responds bluntly.

I bit down on my lip and shake my head. “No…I guess not…sorry…” Shrugging, I take a seat quickly, still trying to think over just how to deal with this and find out where we stand, as I pull out my sandwiches and open the can of soda I just bought.

Asking her right out would be the easiest of course, but then after everything I’ve given up and been through, no way am I going to risk it all to do that… No, the simplest route on this occasion is definitely not the way to go!

Trying to ease the tension at the table as usual Alex goes off into a tale about what he was doing in computer class this morning, but I have to admit I zone out somewhat as two figures approach the table.

“Hey guys!” Tess beams around at us, in quite a surprising manner as she walks up with Kyle.

Max looks up, expecting to have to fend off another round of passes, but a look of shock passes over his face as he notes Kyle’s presence. “Hey Tess, Kyle…” He nods to both of them as they take a seat.

“So I thought we’d go to Senor Chows, and then see a movie maybe…?” Kyle briefly nods to Max, before turning back to Tess as he makes his suggestion, seemingly having been in the middle of a conversation with her.

I hold my breath as I hear this, risking the slightest glance at Max, who I find is looking back at me too. We both know what this could mean…

“Sure, sounds great…” Her voice tinkles a little as she responds with a smile, resting a hand over his and then looking round at us, one by one. As finally she gets to Max, it’s almost as though she’s giving him one last chance, and much as I try not to, I feel myself growing excited. “Max, I just thought I’d tell you, Kyle and I are going out this Friday…together…”

A few short words, with a far greater meaning than Kyle will ever know… He actually looks a little surprised, but it’s nothing she can’t deal with I’m sure, and I can feel my heart begin to beat faster as she waits for Max’s response.

Being careful never to give the slightest indication of how much this means – although I’m sure I know what he’s feeling – Max nods simply. “Well I hope you have a nice time…”

The rest of lunch passes without much event, and we pack up quickly at the end, clearing away our rubbish and grabbing our bags, heading back to our lockers before afternoon class starts.

“Maria, I have something I need to do before class, so I’ll go on ahead and see you later okay?” I excuse myself quickly, practically running down the corridor away from our lockers. I only slow as I reach the classroom, pushing open the door and walking inside, taking my seat quickly, and waiting…

A few minutes later, as I expect, Max walks through the door. He blinks in surprise, knowing that I don’t usually arrive until after him.

“Hey…” I greet him softly, offering a small smile as he comes to set next to me as always.

“Hey…” He responds likewise, although minus the smile.

“So…Tess and Kyle…”

He nods. “Yup… I hope they’ll be very happy…”

“Yeah, me too…” I smile again, taking a deep breath. “So…”

“So…” There’s a small twinkle in his eyes and although he doesn’t say anything more, his meaning is clear as he reaches under the desk to take my hand in his. It’s such a tiny gesture, but it means so much… This is what we’ve been waiting for…

There are so many times I’ve thought this would never happen, and yet here we are…

This isn’t going to be a quick fix, and instant solution… It’s going to take time, but that’s okay…

We’ll go one step at a time, take it slow, but in the end, we’re going to be together… Max, Abigail and I…our family…
My fics:

Dreams and Reality
Reality Revealed
Family Connections
When Love and Loss Collide
When Friendship and Love Combine - New!
If Only...
The Important Thing
Home for Christmas
I Knew Him Before (PB fic)
Love Always...
The First Time Around - New!

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Roswell Fanatic
Posts: 1130
Joined: Wed May 21, 2003 5:54 am
Location: UK

Post by KatnotKath » Sat Jul 01, 2006 6:10 pm

Hey guys, I'm back!

roswell3053 - Thanks for reading, glad you enjoyed the new chapter.
LoveIsForever - Well Liz said Tess appeared different when talking to Kyle - more real perhaps than when she's flinging herself at Max?
Erina - You're being cautious I see, can't blame you...
RhondaAnn - Alex and Isabel aren't dating, they did at one time, but split up after Liz and Max did... As for the girls being friends with Isabel, Tess is, but not sure about Liz or Maria... I suppose the hanging together is a sign of the fact that they're still tied in a way, thanks to the secret they share...
Begonia9508 - Abby is very much her mother's child, so there's not that much similarity between her and Max, and besides, it's strange what people can miss when they're not looking for it... As for Tess testing Max, maybe she is, or maybe not...only time will tell I guess...
kittens - Who would they tell though - Maria? - we all know how good she is at keeping a secret :?
Ultimatepickupline - LOL I agree with you completely Max and Liz make such a good couple, and have to admit, Tess with Kyle I can handle...
Flamehair - Is it a game or not...? Well, here's hoping for the latter... Thanks for the congrats about my exams, still waiting for my results but trying not to think about it too much :?
Timelord31 - Thanks
Liz2Infinity - Thanks for reading, glad you're enjoying it.
skippypeanut - Glad you're enjoying the story, thanks for reading.
isabelle - :D:D yay, glad you're liking it. I think probably Liz didn't speak to Maria on that occassion because she really didn't think about it - she's had a lot on her mind, especially after the eraser room too hehe. I imagine she will have spoken to her since though... As for Max being kept away from Abby, I can't say I like it either, but it's difficult. As for secret encounters, the eraser room isn't the only place they take place, he does come see Liz with Abby on occassion, but they both have to be very careful of course. Those meetings are obviously unknown to the others, and are infrequent though, and unfortunately with the exception of such occassions, his contact with Abby is limited,... So Abby doesn't know he's her daddy, but she does know him, to an extent, although as Liz said earlier, Maria and Alex get to see her far more than Max does :(...
Morning Dreamgirl - Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it. I know it's all unfair, and that keeping the secret probably isnt the best thing to do, but for the moment they feel that it's all they can do, and as to what will happen in the future, only time will tell I guess...

Okay, so it's taken me a lot longer than I would have liked, but I hope the new chapter won't disappoint anyone. I just want to say thanks to everyone that's been reading this story, I only hope that you're enjoying it, because I know I enjoyed writing it.

Thanks for being patient and sorry again for the wait.


Chapter 6

“Liz, honey could you get table five’s order for me please…?” I sigh and look up, reluctantly tearing my gaze away from the little girl in front of me, standing up as I grab my order pad from the table. Despite the fact dad usually lets me take double the time I used to, my breaks always seem so short, and I always want more…

It’s natural I guess, I’m at school in the day, working half the evenings… Apart from the weekend, most of the time I spend with Abby is either when she’s sleeping, or when I’m feeding, changing or bathing her…

Not that mom and dad wouldn’t let me give up working in the Crashdown… And not that I haven’t been tempted to do exactly that… But I know that college is going to cost money, and I want to help with that…

We’re not rich…in fact, far from it… But mom and dad have always encouraged me to believe in myself, even after I had Abby… They might be disappointed in some ways, but they've still encouraged me to aim high, and that’s going to cost… By working in the Crashdown, at least I feel as though I’m contributing… Sure it’s still their money when it comes down to it, but at least then I’ve earnt it, and they’re not paying someone to work in the Crashdown too…

Giving a sad smile, I reach over, waving my finger back and forth as Abby grabs hold. “Be back in a bit sweetheart…” I lean over, kissing the top of her head and looking over to mom who’s stood a little way back. She smiles and moved forward again, sliding in next to my daughter as I wander down the diner and get back to work.

It’s strange really… Everything seems exactly the same as normal…just as it has for the last month… There’s nothing to show that things have changed, and yet I know they have…

“Good Morning, welcome to the Crashdown…” I fix a smile on my face, greeting the customers who have just sat down. “Can I take your order…?”


I hear the voice in my head just before the bell above the door jingles, and I know it’s him without turning round. *Just a minute…* Chewing my lip, I force myself to concentrate on the group in front of me as they continue to read the menu. When in a few minutes, they still don’t seem to have decided, I open my mouth, ready to offer to come back in a few minutes.

“We’ll have three Will Smiths, two portions of space fries, and one portion of UFO rings…”

I note down the order quickly and nod. “Would you like anything to drink…?”

The order is completed by three sodas, and I nod again with another smile. “Alright, I’ll be right back then…” Sticking my pad in my apron pocket, I head back to the counter, stopping at the hatch to pass on the orders, before turning and moving to fix the drinks.


I smile softly. “Hey…” It’s such a small thing, and yet it’s nice to see him back in the Crashdown…

“Max, we don’t often see you in here on a week night now…” Dad comments as he walks up behind me. He’s come a long way in his attitude over the last year or so… When we first broke up, I remember that dad was all for banning him from the diner…of course told him it wasn’t necessary, but we did go through a period where he was anything but civil, and I think it only really began to improve after Max made that first visit to see me after Abby was born…

He’s still obviously not too happy to see him though, and I flash an apologetic look in Max’s direction. It's really not fair considering what he knows, but I know my dad holds Max responsible for what happened in a way. He always blamed Max for our nasty break-up, and had it not been for said break-up I would never have been upset enough to go out like he believes I did.

So I guess you could say that Max had the usual 'parent's fury' to deal with anyway...even if not in the traditional way...

*It’s okay….I understand...* He responds silently, looking over at my father and refusing to shy from his gaze. “You’re right, it’s been a long time…” He responds simply, adding to me alone *I missed the service…*

I keep my expression neutral, but inside I’m glowing and nod slightly. “Okay, well let me just take these drinks over, and then I’ll take your order…” I offer him a small smile, making no attempt to hide it from my dad. “Welcome back…”

A few minutes later, I’ve taken his order and I’m fixing the cherry coke he’s asked for when the bell above the door rings again. I look over, and hold my breath for a moment as I see Isabel and Tess walk in.

Immediately they notice Max of course, and I look at him, questioning how he wants to play this. It's been a month now since Tess started going out with Kyle, and while thing might still break-down, I think we have confirmed this isn't just some scheme of Tess'...

My answer comes as he reaches out to squeeze my hand gently. “One step at a time…together…” He whispers softly, not daring to speak in my mind now they’re close enough to feel it.

I smile softly, and nod, before pulling back my hand as they approach the counter, offering a smile to both of them. “Isabel, Tess, hey…can I get you something to drink?”

Isabel responds quickly, asking for two cherry cokes, before turning her attention to her brother. “Are you going to come over and sit with us Max…?” She asks him pointedly, obviously giving him an out of talking to me as he was when they came in.

The ice queen…will anyone ever thaw that frozen heart of hers…?

Despite her obvious expectations though, Max shakes his head. “Actually Isabel, I’m quite happy where I am…you’re welcome to join me if you like…?” He motions to two nearby buffets, but remains where he is, offering me another smile which I return somewhat hesitantly.

Tess looks between us curiously for a moment, as though trying to read the situation, and for a moment I’m afraid… Is it too soon…have we moved too quick…? For what seems like an age I wait, and then see her nod and smile, almost as though indicating her consent. “No it’s okay, we’ll sit at one of the booths…Kyle’s going to be here soon you know, and we don’t want to intrude…” She responds, waving off the suggestion, and motioning to one of the free booths.

Isabel is less than eager to leave Max alone with me, but with Tess on our side, there’s little she can do but nod, following Tess over to the booth, where she sits, positioning herself facing the counter and watching us I’m sure.

“Isabel’s still not too keen on me…” I comment softly, sighing as I move round and begin to wipe down the counter.

Max reaches for my hand, making me put the cloth down and pulling me forward towards him. “She’ll come round…in time…”

I look down at him and nod. “I hope so…”

“How could she not…?” He winks at me and reaches up, wiggling the antennae on my headband. “You make such an adorable alien…”

I laugh and grin, and it’s almost as though we’ve gone back two years to when things were perfect…


His voice is so soft I almost don’t hear. “Yes…?”

He gives me a smile. “Will you go out with me…”

I look at him, not quite understanding.

“On a date…” He clarifies softly, reaching for my hand. “Will you go out with me on a date…?”

The request is simple, and my answer is too. “Yes…”

Tess is moving on with her life, and it's time for us to do the same...

“This Friday…?” His eyes shine like an eager puppy, waiting impatiently to go out and play. But then it’s been a long time…

I nod, opening my mouth to voice my agreement but as a baby’s cries split the air, my attention immediately shifts as I turn, looking up the room to where mom’s lifting Abby and standing up. “She probably needs changing…I have to go sort her out…”

He nods and I can see the sadness in his eyes, the knowledge of how he’s missed so much and the pain of knowing that no one can ever know she’s truly his… “Of course…go to her…” He smiles softly. “Give her a kiss from me…?”

I nod. “Sure…” I reach out and squeeze his hand before pulling back and then hurrying down to meet mom. I hold out my arms silently, taking my daughter into my arms, slipping through the back and up the stairs into my room. I lay her down on the unit, lifting up her skirt and pulling down her tights, and it’s not until I’m unfastening the dirty diaper that I realise I’m not alone.

Mom smiles softly as I look up. “Hey sweetheart…”

I smile back, but I can see she’s got something on her mind, something she wants to say… I continue what I’m doing, cleaning Abby up with the wipes, and putting her in a clean diaper as I wait for her to speak.

And finally she does… “Sweetheart, I don’t want you to get this the wrong way, but I want to speak to you about something…” She trails off and shakes her head, before correcting herself. “No, I want to talk to you about someone…”

I finish smoothing down my little girl’s skirt, lifting her up and rocking her in my arms, giving her that kiss I promised her father.

I just wish he could give it to her himself....

“Who…?” I know of course, but I’m playing dumb for the moment…

Mom doesn’t look impressed. “I think you know honey…” She pauses a moment and then nods, allowing me to have my way. “Alright sweetheart, I’m worried about Max… You’re getting close again…”

Close? - well I guess that’s one way to put it…but I can’t say we ever drifted apart honestly in truth…although she doesn’t know that of course…

Her gaze rests on me, and I don’t look away, simply nodding, and smiling. “He asked me out…” I respond simply without denial. I see the look in her eyes and bite down on my lip. “I love him mom…and I think you know that…”

She nods. “I do…” Her gaze flickers between my face, and that of Abby in my arms. “I just don’t want you to get hurt again honey…” She tells me softly, and I know what she’s thinking - Is Max really prepared for this…?

I shake my head softly. “I won’t…”
My fics:

Dreams and Reality
Reality Revealed
Family Connections
When Love and Loss Collide
When Friendship and Love Combine - New!
If Only...
The Important Thing
Home for Christmas
I Knew Him Before (PB fic)
Love Always...
The First Time Around - New!

User avatar
Roswell Fanatic
Posts: 1130
Joined: Wed May 21, 2003 5:54 am
Location: UK

Post by KatnotKath » Sun Jul 09, 2006 12:28 pm

Hey guys :), as always thanks for all the fantastic feedback.

RhondaAnn - I think that Maria and Alex will probably be nervous about Liz getting hurt, while Michael as you say probably won't be so fussed. Isabel I don't see warming to Liz again for a while yet, considering that she still believes that Liz essentially betrayed Max. It's going to take time for everyone to get used to it of course, but I imagine they'll be trying to take it steadily anyway.
behrluv32 - Who knows what might happen in the future, but for now they obviously think that keeping the truth quiet is for the best. Tess has moved on, but it's all new, and how she reacts to them dating compared to knowing they have a child together might be something completely different. You're right that it's better to come out and tell them to have the others find out, but at the moment they probably think its too soon to even think about it and hence feel they don't have a choice. As for Liz looking like the bitch, I don't think many people do see it that way - Isabel does sure, but my guess would be most look on her as having made a mistake. A lot of things can happen when you're drunk which wouldn't happen when you're sobor. Its a mess yes, no one is saying that it isn't, but they're trying to make things work out...
lazza - Abby is very much her mother's child, most of the resemblance is to Liz, and since there's nothing major like Max's ears (lol) to indicate a resemblance, the tendancy of people is to see what they expect, and they don't expect to see Max in Abby... (If that makes any sense...?)
Timelord31 - Thanks for reading, glad you enjoyed it
roswell3053 - Thanks
pandas2001 - I don't think they have an intention to come clean at the moment, although who knows what will happen in the future. If they get powers it could be complicated, although if as in the series Liz gets her own powers that might expain it... It's not that they want to keep it secret, but I guess they're worried how people would take it. And yes, that's one reason why maybe they should have told people originally, but they did what they felt was best at the time...
begonia9508 - Yes Abby is Max's, and maybe you're right about Tess, but I guess she's the only one that knows the answer to that. As for Abby lol - she doesn't have Max's ears, that much is for certain.
ultimatepickupline - Max and Liz started being able to take to each other mentally part way through her pregnancy - at first they assumed it was an aftereffect of the pregnancy and would wear off after, but it didn't and they've been using it where possible since. They do have to be in relative close proximity though, so Max wouldn't be able to speak to Abby, if it even worked with her, from across town.
L-J-L 76 - I'm afraid a lot of your questions seem set to remain unanswered, but as,and when I write a sequel I will see if I can at least address some of them.
Flamehair - Kyle isn't a game for Tess no, I figure that after two years going after someone that didn't want to be with her, she's finally come round to realising that there's more to life, and much as I might not like her as a character, everyone deserves a chance to be happy don't they? - which includes Tess as much as Liz and Max.
isabelle - :D:D glad you liked it. I think the telepathy is something they have to be careful with, and if Abby starts to share it, she has to be taught to do the same. It's probably going to be a while before any powers she might have will emerge, so it's a question for the future I guess. I think that Tess will be okay with them dating, she's probably realised by this point that Max just isn't interested, and it's not only him that's miserable without Liz, she can't be having the greatest time going after someone and getting nothing but rejection in response... As for Max marrying Liz and adopting his daughter, you're right that the latter would be the only way - blood tests are definitely out - and and as for the marrying...well, it's Max and Liz, what do you think? :wink:

Well, it's been a long time coming but today is finally the day when I can say that I've finished a fic on this board :D:D.

You guys have been wonderful with this fic, and knowing that you've all enjoyed the story means a lot. I know that some of you have disagreed with the decisions that were made, and might disagree with the fact that I made out Max to be a victim in it too, but that's the way that I saw it. In different ways, both he and Liz were missing out and struggling with things. The situation is far from ideal, and I know perhaps the plan they came up with wasn't the greatest, but they did what they thought was best, and it's a fact of life that hindsight can be a wonderful thing afterall. Unfortunately once you've done something it can be difficult to back down and change your mind, especially in a situation like this.

This is the final part of If Only, and I just wanted to say thanks to anyone who's read and left feedback to the story over the time its been up here. So, roswell3053, Thanette, Timelord31, Morning Dreamgirl, AllieXie, RhondaAnn, mlover25, Emz80m, Flamehair, begonia9508, maya, Ellie, L-J-L 76, dreamer19, lazza, Icequeen, KarenEvans, BETHANN, tiredmuse, behrluv32, anonyamousarfan, g7silvers, Empress_luci, LoveIsForever, Elizabeth Kivana, FallenMagic, Alien614, pandas2001, isabelle, Erina, Kittens, Natz, ultimatepickupline, Liz2Infinity and skippypeanut - THANK YOU! The feedback you have all left really does help and I just hope you know that.

I will say that there will be one or more sequels to this eventually, but it might take a bit of time because I'm still trying to work out exactly what want to write about in them. I have a lot of ideas, but it's a case of picking out the ones which will work and then of course doing the actual writing lol

All that said, all that remains is for me to say thanks to anyone who has been reading, I hope you will enjoy the epilogue, short as it is, and have done the same with the rest of the story.




I think my mom still has her doubts – in fact, I know she does…but Max and I have been dating again for over two months now…

“When do you get off…? I think this little lady is getting rather impatient…”

I smile as I look over the counter, watching Max as he sits with Abby on his lap, his arms carefully held around her to make sure she doesn’t fall. It’s a lovely sight, watching him with her, and one that’s becoming more common by the day. “Not too long now…I’ve got another ten minutes…”

The ten minutes actually turns out to be halved, since it’s not busy, and dad decides I can go a little early.

And one thing’s for certain, he doesn’t have to tell me twice!

Grinning broadly, I dash into the backroom, changing and grabbing my bag, before rejoining Max as he’s struggling to try and get Abby to sit in the stroller.

I chuckle with amusement, causing Max to look up with a mock hurt expression. “Hey, I’m trying…” He pouts and I lean over to kiss him briefly before bending over and looking sternly at my daughter. “Abigail Marie Parker!” I use her full name, giving Max cause to chuckle this time as I fasten her into the stroller with relative ease.

“Are you three off then…?” Mom approaches us with a smile. She’s still nervous I know, but she does try…

I nod and smile back. “Yeah, we shouldn’t be that long, just a couple of hours probably…”

“Okay, have a good time…” She grins and bobs down in front of her granddaughter, ruffling her hair. “And you make sure to be good for your mommy and Uncle Max okay…?”

The one problem with this picture - Uncle Max…still Uncle Max…it’s so unfair on him, on her…I wish it could be different…

“Oh, she’s always a good girl for us aren’t you princess…?” Max responds without batting an eye outwardly to the label she gives him even though inside I know he’s hurting…

I reach for his hand, squeezing it and then look back to mom, telling her we’ll see her later before pushing the stroller down the aisle and out of the diner.

A few moments later, we’re on the pavement, and another quarter of an hour later sees us in the park, sitting together with Abby playing on the grass in front of us. I smile softly as I watch her as she stands up, turning and toddling, a little uncertainly towards us “Ma-mama…”

“Come here sweetheart…” I lean forward holding out my hands and just catching her as she stumbles. I lift her up in the air, above my face and she giggles before I bring her back down and into my arms.

Max, who’s sat next to me moves closer, taking me, and therefore Abby too into his arms, and nothing has ever felt so right… I smile and lean back against him, feeling his lips press into my hair as he holds me in his arms. A moment later, as Abigail toddles back to play again, I turn to him for a moment and our lips meet briefly.

“I love you Liz Parker…” He whispers as he pulls back.

“I love you too Max Evans…” I smile softly, before leaning back towards him for one more kiss.

So here I am, a seventeen year old teenage mother of one beautiful little girl whose father is the love of my life… It’s not ideal, and things aren’t always easy, but you know what…I’m happy!

The End
My fics:

Dreams and Reality
Reality Revealed
Family Connections
When Love and Loss Collide
When Friendship and Love Combine - New!
If Only...
The Important Thing
Home for Christmas
I Knew Him Before (PB fic)
Love Always...
The First Time Around - New!