Authors' irrational fears

[Angel]

My biggest writing fear is that I'll never get my inspiration back to at least finish my one unfinished fic. But more so that I'll never get to experience the thrill of writing that I used to have.

[Heavenli24]

But more so that I'll never get to experience the thrill of writing that I used to have.

I've been feeling the same way lately - somehow I haven't been able to write well recently, and I haven't been happy with what I have managed to write. More than once over the last couple of months, I've had the horrible thought that perhaps my inspiration and excitement for writing have abandoned me, and I'd hate for that to be the case

I have just managed to get something written again after 3 months of frustration and I feel like I'm getting back on my feet somewhat, so I'm hoping that the lack of motivation was just a phase .

[Jezebel Jinx]

Okay here's my fear.....I'm thirty five years old....almost thirty six and I've never been in love...nor has anyone ever been in love with me.So the whole concept of the emotion...what I mean is how powerful love is between two people,how it makes you feel or what it can make you do is lost to me.I have no experince with it.So it's hard for me to write the emotion or two people sharing it.

The only thing I know of it is from seeing couples in real life,movies/tv and in fanfiction.So I'm always nervous that I either have the couples like two cold fish or to over the top with the lovey dovey and making them look stupid.

Same here. That's a big fear for me. I've been in lust certainly but I've never considered myself in love. Two guys have said they loved me but they hardly knew me so I don't consider that love. So I'm worried that when I write characters that are supposed to be in love they'll come out really sappy or cold and uninterested in the whole thing.

[spacegirl23]

I am such a loser! I just discovered this thread (great topic, btw!).

I have NEVER posted a Roswell fic before. EVER. And the only multi-parter fic that I ever finished was written on some yellow pad that I lost in college (which wasn't a loss, coz it wasn't good! ).

I love reading everyone's replies to this board, coz we have so much in common. Here's my list:

1) That people will think that my writing's stupid. Seriously. I never show my writing to anyone, simply because since I was in grad school, writing has been incredibly personal to me. Aside from my schoolwork or any school paper articles, I've never shown it to anyone. The only time I considered posting fanfic was when I was back in college. I was seriously addicted to Roswell fan fic and had saved so many of the classic Candy fics on my PC. I had written some, unfinished of course, but I kept it in a separate folder. My roommates, bored out of their minds, started reading the Roswell fics and somehow opened the one I was working on. They read it, and were surprised to see it was unfinished (I only saved finished fics), and asked me about its continuation. They were surprised to know it was done by yours truly, and told me it was good and that I should continue the fic. Even though I totally freaked, I was glad they thought I didn't suck. I've had confidence in writing, ever since.

2) That I'll be totally uninspired and not be able to finish a story. I have like, seven unfinished Roswell fics on my laptop, and ever since I found RF, I've been dying to post one. But since I wouldn't want for my first fic to end up in the Dead and Buried forum, I promised myself I'd only post a fic if it's done.

3) That I wouldn't be able to capture and describe a scene that I have in my mind. Most of my fics start with a scene in my mind, and it sucks that it's much much prettier in my head before I put it down on paper.

4) That I'll totally suck at sex scenes. Because of my inexperience in that area, I pretty much have no clue how to write it. I've never written a sex scene before, and while I love writing the scene where the couple is strongly making out and tearing off each other's clothes, after that I'm pretty much out of stuff to write. Thank goodness for books and fic that describe the art of lovemaking very very well.

5) That I'll get negative feedback. I know that as an author, you can't choose what feedback you'll hear, but I'm fragile that way.

Well, that's it. It's awesome that everyone shared their fears, coz I know I'm not alone in feeling these things.

[April]

2) That I'll be totally uninspired and not be able to finish a story. I have like, seven unfinished Roswell fics on my laptop, and ever since I found RF, I've been dying to post one. But since I wouldn't want for my first fic to end up in the Dead and Buried forum, I promised myself I'd only post a fic if it's done.

This was one of my big fears when I started posting, too, so I decided to finish the fic before posting it. Nowadays, I have enough confidence in my finishing capabilities that I'll start posting a fic when I have over half of it written.

4) That I'll totally suck at sex scenes. Because of my inexperience in that area, I pretty much have no clue how to write it. I've never written a sex scene before, and while I love writing the scene where the couple is strongly making out and tearing off each other's clothes, after that I'm pretty much out of stuff to write. Thank goodness for books and fic that describe the art of lovemaking very very well.

I think the best advice I got was to not feel pressured to write one. If you don't want to write a sex scene, don't write one. If you do, then . . . well, brace yourself, because it kind of feels weird. Those kinds of scenes are much easier to write with practice, though, I think. I still worry about them, too, though. There's still that constant battle of trying to make it not seem like porn.

5) That I'll get negative feedback. I know that as an author, you can't choose what feedback you'll hear, but I'm fragile that way.

One of the things I love about this board is that the feedback can often get very intense and heated, but it's never gotten to the point (for me at least) where I feel like it's extremely negative. I think most people on this board realize that fanfiction is funfiction. We're not writing this because we're making money off it. We're writing this for our own enjoyment and for the enjoyment of our readers. So mostly everyone is very respectful.

You know, I would love to read a fic by you. I can tell just whenever I read your feedback that you're a really good writer. Sometimes it's easier to start off with a ficlet. I don't know.

-April

[nibbles2]

fanfiction is funfiction

Clearly, you've never had to read one of your fics. They're torturefiction.

But I do love that expression.

[April]

April wrote:
fanfiction is funfiction

Clearly, you've never had to read one of your fics. They're torturefiction.

I know, I know! But there's a certain amount of fun to be had in torture.

[spacegirl23]

Nowadays, I have enough confidence in my finishing capabilities that I'll start posting a fic when I have over half of it written.

That's pretty much my goal too! Because I hate having to write anything, so when something feels like an obligation, I stop and leave it.

Also, I want to first finish a fic before posting coz I want to stay true to my story, because I don't want to shift gears to please an audience. I'm not saying that any authors are like that, but it's mostly because I'm kind of a people pleaser. (Scene: People Pleasers Anonymous. "Hi, my name is Trixie, and I am a people pleaser".) I'm a bit pathetic like that.

I think the best advice I got was to not feel pressured to write one. If you don't want to write a sex scene, don't write one.

That's terrific advice! Thank you for sharing!

One of the things I love about this board is that the feedback can often get very intense and heated, but it's never gotten to the point (for me at least) where I feel like it's extremely negative. I think most people on this board realize that fanfiction is funfiction.

Actually before RF, I've never participated in a forum-like fanfiction site before. I rarely read reviews, and I don't know why I ever thought that feedbackers were harsh (in my mind, I was imagining something like my grade school English teachers). I started reading feedback for different stories, and I'm totally getting warm fuzzy feelings about how everyone's so supportive of each other (especially of the people who don't have English as their first language, like me!). It's the Roswell love that binds us together, and I love that!

(nibbles2 has a point! )

You know, I would love to read a fic by you. I can tell just whenever I read your feedback that you're a really good writer.

Seriously, April, you are the sweetest. Thank you. I hope that I can start posting one before the year ends!

[Rowedog]

(especially of the people who don't have English as their first language, like me!)

Holy crap, you're ESL? Colour me impressed. I seriously had absolutely no idea, because there's nothing to indicate that in the way that you write.

People who are brave enough to write in a language that's not their first impress the crap out of me, mainly because I only speak English (and pretty poorly at times, too ).

I hope that I can start posting one before the year ends!

I hope so too, because I'd read it.

And April? This is a scandalous falsehood:

I know, I know! But there's a certain amount of fun to be had in torture.

Let's take 521 as an example, shall we? I would have been totally fine had you not dropped Isabel into the mix. In fact, I would have been deliriously happy once K/T got back together (because they kinda needed to break up because of how much Kyle idolised her). Now you're just giving me an ulcer. My stomach lining would like to have some serious words with you.

[spacegirl23]

Holy crap, you're ESL? Colour me impressed. I seriously had absolutely no idea, because there's nothing to indicate that in the way that you write.

You are incredibly sweet! Thank you! (I pretty much learned English from reading Sweet Valley High/Kids/Middle School! )

I hope that I can start posting one before the year ends!

I hope so too, because I'd read it.

Another incentive for me to finish a fic! And that's because I totally adore your work.

And April? This is a scandalous falsehood:

I know, I know! But there's a certain amount of fun to be had in torture.

Now you're just giving me an ulcer. My stomach lining would like to have some serious words with you.

LMAO.